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February 3, i~r^ TI
For a Smile
The Guatemalan minister, as he was
leaving a recent reception in Washington,
said to the man who called the carriages:
"Call the carriage of the Guatemalan minister.
You understand, the Guatemalan
minister." "Yes. sir; understand perfectly,
sir," he replied, and then shouted:
"The carriage for the watermelon minister!"
A cautious Scotch elder, it is said, had
taken supper at his nastor's house and
in returning thanks after the meal, entered
upon a detailed exposition of various
causes for gratiude. He concluded by invoking
the divine blessing upon the pastor's
wife as his godly helpmeet, who had
always upheld his hands in every work?
"at least" he added in a saving clause,
"as far as we know."
Two small girls were talking about
their dreams for the future. "When I grow
up," said Mary. "I'm coine tn hp a octinni
teacher." "Well. I'm going; to be a mother
with four children," said Stella. "Well,
when they come to my school, I'm going
to whip them, whip them, whip them!"
"You mean thing," said Stella, as the
tears came into her eyes," "what have
my poor children ever done to you?"?
The Delineator.
The secretary of one of the college
classes at Princeton, in sending out each
year a list of questions to be answered
by members of the class, in order that
the reanlfcs 1? j??? * -
? . wwulvD may uc tllliy lHDUI&t6d and
set forth In the university annual, is said
always to include in his liaf this question:
"Are you engaged?"
It would seem that one of the members
was cursed with doubt in this respect, for
in the blank space given over the query
mentioned he made the return as follows:
"Do not know. Am awaiting letter."?
Harper's Magazine.
A minister of a fashionable church in
Newark had always left the greeting of
strangers to he attended to by the ushers
until he read the newspaper articles in
reference to the matter.
"Suppose a representative should visit
our church," said his wife. "Wouldn't
it he awful?"
"It would," the minister admitted.
The following Sunday evening he noticed
a plainly dressed woman in one of
the free pews. She sat alone, and was
clearly not a member of the flock. After
the benediction the minister hastened
and intercepted her at the door. "How
do you do?" he said, offering his hand.
"I am very glad to have you with us."
"TV. ?
* utuik you," replied the young woman.
"I hope we may see you often In our
church home," he went on. "We are always
glad to welcome new faces."
"Yes, sir."
"Do you live in this parish?" he asked.
The girl looked blank. "If you will give
me your address, my wife and I will call
on you some evening."
"You wouldn't need to go far, sir," said
the young woman. "I'm your cook."?
Philadelphia Ledger.
IE PRESBYTERIAN OF THE SOU1
wSM Grant
IV II Ify J makes b
i-t" 1 christm/
acceptai
THF f.RANf
I JL^ M ZZ
Excursion
Mobile, Pensacola ant
VIA
Central of Georg
Account Mardi Gras celebrations Fe
sold to Mobile, Pensacola, and New Orlea
leave these points returning up to and in
March 1, 1909, except that an extension to
of ticket and payment of extension fee of
For further information in regard to
e t ticket agent.
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