Newspaper Page Text
November 10, 1909. TP
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Story Corner |
LEARNED IT BY EAR.
The dear little girl arose, bowed and recited
it in this manner:
"Lettuce Denby up N. Dewing,
Widow Hartford N. E. Fate;
Still H. E. Ving, still per Sue Wing,
Learn to label Aunty Waite."
Then, with the tumultuous applause of
the audience ringing in her ears, she sat
down in happy confusion.?Chicago Tribune.
Two telephone girls were talking over
tho vi? i ro *?? 1 A
nii?. uvvu ncie uiscusBiug wnai
they should wear. In the midst of this
important conversation a masculine voice
interrupted, asking humbly for a number.
One of the girls became indignant, and
scornfully asked, "What line do you think '
you are on, anyhow?" "Well," said the
man, "I am not sure, but judging front
what I have heard I should say I was on
a clothes-line."
"Jimmy," said the teacher, "what is a
cape?" "A cape is iand extending into the
water." "Correct. William, define a
gulf." "A gulf is water extending into
the land," "Good. Christopher," to a
small, eager-looking boy, "what is a ,
mountain?" Christopher shot up from his
seat so suddenly as to startle the teacher,
and promptly responded, "A mountain is
InnH ovton/1 tt
???vi vAiviiuiiig 1 uiu tuc an. ?iiun b ncr*
aid.
The traveling salesman had looked at
Mrs. Dolan's third-floor-back, and found it
neat and attractive. "I'll take it for two
months," he said, "and I always pay as I
go. I suppose that will suit you?" "It
will not," said Mrs. Dolan, firmly. "There
are times I'm not in the house whin
folks goes; they're liable tc be called off
suddent, wh'n I'm out o' the way. My
boarders navs whin thev come?or elno
they don't come."?Youth's Companion.
Miss Backbay of Boston: "Now we do
not speak any more. I don't recofenize
a girl who indulges in profanity." Mr.
Pitts: "You don't mean to say." "Oh,
yes, 1 do. We were talking of Browning;
and she said, 'Oh, bother Browning!'"
"But 'bother' is not profanity!" "Maybe
not, but 'bother Browning* is."
"Your husband has been ill," said the
caller. "Yes," replied the little, worriedlookine
woman "hf> has haan faallno- varv
w 1 - -VW..MQ ' W' /
badly. I do my best to please him, but
nothing seems to satisfy him." "Is his
condition critical?" "It's worse than critical,"
she answered, with a sigh, "it's
abusive."
Unimpeachable?If you were to see the
unequalled volume of unimpeachable testimony
In favor of Hood's Harsnparllla,
you wnuld upbraid yourself for so long
delaying to take this effective medicine
for that blood disease from which you
nro suffering.
IE PRESBYTERIAN OF THE SC
| Miscellaneous |
AMERICAN HEN VERSUS A GOLD
MINE.
The American hen has demonstrated
her right to cackle. Her total output is
greater than the output of any other one
class of products in the industrial world.
According to the last census there are
233,598,005 chickens of laying age in the
United States. Their aggregate value is
$70,000,000, and if divided, the eggs they
lay would allow 203 eggs annually to each
person in the country. The value of all
the fowls, about $85,000,000, would entitle
every person to one dollar if the proceeds
of sale were divided. The weieht
of the eggs laid yearly tips 970,363 tons,
while all the animal products exported?
pork, tallow, beef, bacon, ham, and sausage?weigh
only 846,860 tons. Chicago
is the greatest egg centre in the country.
Seven hundred and twenty millions of
eggs are stored there yearly. An averaage
of 2,000,000 cases of eggs comes into
Chicago every year, each case containing
360 eggs. The greater part of these arrives
in March, April, and May, when
about 20,000 cases are received daily.
During the remainder of the year about
5,000 cases a day are received. These
eggs come from all States West to the
Kocky Mountains and south to, and in
DR. JAMES
A Memorial Volume C
PAltT I. lUt. WOODKOW AS KERN MV 11 im
Charactersketchea written by hu form
PAKTlI. II IS TKACHINGM, AM CONTAIN I
It IAI-S. KTt".
Kdlted anil published by his daughter
L. liryun Cmnpnny. i.uou pages. Full cloth
Copies may be obtained from
.MISS M. W.
50 Lesson Business
Teacher,
THE SCIENCE OF ACCOUNTS
Arranged for Public School Busini
School. 25 Lessons for Graded Schot
School Boards. Money refunded if no
tt a uooKiei containing 12 sped m<
Addre
Southwestern Prest
CLARKSVILLE,
Thirty-Fifth Session O
Literary, Scientific, Divinity Courses.
Graduates prominent in the South. Ex?e
No saloons. Expenses moderate.
(1776) Hampden Si<
Able Faculty. Select student body,
ble moral and intellectual tone. Extensh
leading to degrees R. A., B. S., B. Lit., ^
modern conveniences.
One hundred and thirty fourth sesd<
For catalogue or other information a
REV. HENRY TUCKER GRAHAI
? *
)UTH. 27
eluding, Texas. Few States East of Chicago,
i. e., Kentucky, Tennessee, and Alabama,
send their surplus to its market.
Most of the Eastern States supply New
York and Boston. The value of the egg
production in tne United States for a single
year is given at 1145,000,000. Wool
produced is valued at $45,750,000; poultry
exceeds it by $91,000,000, and eggs
by $99,000,000. The American hens' lay
in a year is equal in value to fifty-seven
per cent of the entire income realized
by the export of all the meat products.
Ir to the eggs is added the value of the
poultry, meat products are completely overbalanced.
Only once since the government
has kept records, in 1900, have the
American mines been able to beat the
record of the American hen.
WHEN IRONING.
i LUHt? u na on my cooKing range, place
over gas, put on three irons. While they
are heating I get meat for a stew, put
in kettle with handle and place over the
irons. This keeps irons hot and boils
meat at the same time. I place water
kettle next to the irons, and that is,
heated by the time I want it for dishes
at noon.
When ironing, put pillow cases over
board and iron handkerchiefs on them.
You are thus ironing both at same time.
The dampness of handkerchiefs dampens
the pillow cases just enough to make
them nice and smooth. I use four irons.
WOODROW.
onsisting of Two Parts.
Friends.
-r pupils. colleagues, and associates.
ed in His Sermons, Addresses, Kdito,
Marlon W. Wood row. Printed by the R.
u Price, t'2.00. Cash to accompany order.
WOODROW,
1301 Washington St., Columbia, S. C.
x -
vjuuiac, VY ltllUUl a
for $1.00
> MADE CLEAR AND 81MPLE.
3ss Course. 50 Lessons for High
>1. Endorsed by Business Men and
entirely satisfactory,
m lessons, sent free if applied for.
88
jEORGE ALLEN, Raleigh, N. C.
>yterian University
TENNESSEE.
pens September 15th.
Students nearly all church members,
llent athletic record. Healthful location.
\AJ 11 I l?u niuu/innic /?.
bbinm vniniuuic, wnanceiior.
iney College (1909)
High standards and thorough work. Nota,'e
Campus and Athletic Field. Courses
t. A. Steam heat, light, baths and other
>n begins September 15, 1909.
ddress,
irt, President. Hampton-Sidney, Va.