Newspaper Page Text
24 (144)
* o
H ii
Story Corner
n ii
A Sl'MrATliETKJ lil JU.l.AlL
"1 woke up suddenly the otlier nigni
and thought 1 heard a burglar in the
room. 1 sat up in bed and that awoke
my wife."
'What did she do?"
"She accused me as usual of having
a burglar bug. Said I'd never hear
a real burglar if 1 lived a thousand
years. 1 said I'd bet 1 would. Sue
said she'd bet 1 wouldn't. And just
then a snadowy form arose Irom behind
the dresser and a hoarse voice exclaimed
: 'He wins, ma'am.' "
"Did you catch him?"
vcatch him? 1 didn't try. i just laid
there and laughed and heard him slam
the door and run down the street. And
say, my wiie was so mad she didn't
speak to me for a whole day. But I'll
bet one thing."
"What is it?"
"I'll bet that burglar was a married
man.?The Advance.
As Mr. Canton looked down at his
waistcoat he discovered that it lacked a
button. "And 1 asked my wife to sew
it on more lirinly last uigui," he said
to nis commuter neighbor in the train.
"1 don't see how sue toigot it."
"buu't ever ask her to ineud anything,"
said nis irieud. "1 learned a
belter way beioie id beeu murr>ed a
year. \? ueu i want any miug mcnued,
say & shirt, tor iuoiauce, i uae u uuuer
my arm, a?l uiuaaea up, and opeu me
Cioaet uoor, and biug out 10 lay wue,
'Wnete's me rag bag, reggy?'
"'ivnat do you waul of iue rag bag?'
sbe'll aak me.
" 'On, 1 mougbt I'd throw this away,'
I tell her, and squeeze it a lime lighter
uuuer uiy arm.
" 'Oet me aee what you have there,'
Bhe'll Bay, and I'll tnuiier bouiemiug
about 'worn-out old tniugl' wnlie 1
hand it over to her.
'"Why, Jatnes Holland!' she'll say,
when sne's spread it out and looked it
over in a hurry. 'I am suprprised at
you! This is perfectly good. It doesn't
need a single thing except ' And
then there she sits down to mend it,
looking as if 1 made her a present."?
Youth's Companion.
Nurse Girl?"0 ma'am, what shall 1
do? The twins have fallen down the
well!"
Modern Parent?"Dear me; how annoying;
just go into the library?very
gently, so as not to disturb Fido?and
get the last number of The Modern
Mother's Magazine; It contains an ^
article on 'How to Bring Up Chil- ,
dren.' "?flu. ?
]
A NON-CONDUCTOlt.
A teacher in an Hast Side school was <
trying to explain some of the simpler J
phenomena of electricity, and at the <
close of her little lecture she asked <
sweetly. "Now can any of you children
srlva ma tha noma nf anmo n?n.n/v- -
ductor and tell us about it In a (ew J
words so that we can all understand?" o
A sharp-eyed street urchin jumped up ?
and down in his seat, waving his grimy S
paw frantically. "I kin, teacher!" he
exclaimed. "Billy Hogan's old man is j
one. They was a spotter on his car J
seen him knock down a fare. Old Hog- "
an's a non-conductor ever since."?LlpptaouUfls
A boy was asked to define "vacuum," S
but couldn't "I've got It in my head,"
be said, "but I can't express It"
M" I
?
i rf
r
, I
THE PRESBYTERIA
: *.'. .
" **?
;: : :'^:':
The discrii
/ in foods, for v
rectly so, somewhat
f less the reasons for cha
anticipate your questions and answ<
at the hands of every discriminating h
Subject: H
Question No. 1 ; Why shon
Answer : Because it not 011b
and economical.
Question No. 2 : Is the llavt
Answer: Yes, the compoundi
a flavor impossible in strt
Question No. 3: Why is III
Answer: The National Disp
promote digestion and st
Naturally therefore, the
produces a wiioiesome ai
never regret it.
Question ~No. 4: You say E
Answer: In the last year ai
other article of food. On
quently, the blend is low
duces the quantity of 1
most coffees.
Conclusion : Is there any re
this delightful and most ]
new methods and moderr
the protection and preser
vince you. YOUR GRC
.. r..
" . S&l'.V* * . ' -S/KiHi,
jjjj^^ ^1
[iriin TO niv ?Now ? for our
itNU lUUAl FREE interesting
iw booklet. It tells all
ibout Dr. Foote's "Home Cyclopedia" of
Plain Home Talks on the subjects of
i>ove, Marriage, Parentage and Sexology,
rhls book is certain to awaken thought
?contains 1,001 facts that every adult
>ught to know. It contains more truths,
:ommonsense. valuable advise and In'ormation
than your doctor would give
'or |100. It answers in plain language
nany questions that occur to the minds
>f men and women.
mi'khay iiii.i, run. ro,
154A, K. 2Ntk St., .New lork.
Vccept This Swell $25 Suit
Yes,FREE. WestartOTrr?wel1-drcw8cdsalee
? _ ^representatives out looking right?we send
I *1 our outllt/rwt at once, biggest and bostsam'?"?
pie book*.attract! vo iubrirs,handsomest color
trie* plates, with our new, remnrkahlc, ear* moneymaking
oi?or,your extra sample auitol.er
as well. Swell-dressed, and blocked by u i.
/ l1 ' ay?a CA" tnako b g money showing our
samples?orders coma thick, fast ar.d
easy. Snarotimoornilof it. No money
or eipenencenecesaary. Noreferencea
or red tape. Wo trust you absolutely.
YOU CAM MAKE
E>P* Per Day Easy or
to $50 a Week
Other ncents nro?you can
itiDir ciirr ?_ . do sa well or better. ExelusiMsrLfc
SUIT Ive territory and special inside wholesale
Everything In price so you can undersell all competition
Just for you. and make Wg profit. When your friends
nrr To *** your suit they will gladly order these
KCC Vau awe]leat, hard tailored rrade-to-measuro
. al - _ , , garments. They will says 13 to|6. Suits. H
JUTFIT
SEND NO MONET
o get ewcll clothes and mako most money. Get in aukk. Na
sk. Everything tent exjrrttmpnid. Hurry up postal today.
treat Central Tailoring Co. CHICAGO,B\Ll.'
N OF THE SOUTH
* .. '^if *
:'-5 V'
'
iffee Question:
ASKED AND ANSWERED
ninating housewife, the woman who seeks
rhosc family nothing is too good, b natura
; loth to give up that which she knows to
nging are sound ones. We have, therefc
3r them, so that our product may receii
lousewife.
A Processec
'Cflll Coffee
id I drink HERO?
j possesses a most delightful flav
:>r of HERO different from that c
Lngwith purechicory lends to the (
light high grade coffees.
iRO so wholesome?
ensatory says, "Chicory is thoug
imulate the liver. It i3 a tonic >
blend of such a healthful artic]
id nourishing drink. You car
LililiO is more economical? Why?
id a half the price of coffee hag
the other hand, the present pri
er in price. Again, the richness
iero necessary to make a cup.
ason why you should deprive y<
healthful breakfast cup? Hero i
t machinery are the best Hero i
vation of its strength, flavor and
>CER KEEPS IT.
Potter Sloan O'Donohue Company
13 and 15 Old Slip. Now York City
FOR YOUR EASTER COMMUNION I
THE THOMAS individual
communion slrvice.
Over 10.0U0 Churehfa using our
say to you, "Adopt this
'ecrrloe for your Easter^Cominun
^ church.large or smalMo purchase
1 u serrloe. Addreee at once,
Thomn Comminlon Service Co., Bo?80fiLlma. Ohio.
Direct Q & C
Route Route
I
TO
NTCTW YORK.
WASHINGTON.
CINCINNATI?DETROIT.
BUFFALO?CLEVELAND.
PITTSBURG?IND1ANAP0LJ8.
BIRMINGHAM?CHATTANOOGA.
ELECTRIC LIGHTED SLEEPERS.
DINING CARS.
Ticket Office: 711 St Cfcarleo St
Depot: Terminal Station, Canal St
Phone: M. Mil
[February 7, 1912
lly, and cor- \ \
be good, un>re,
endeavored to
re the consideration it deserves
1 Combination of
and Chicory
or, but is both wholesome
>f most high grade coffees?
x>ffee a rich creamy flavor,
ht to increase the appetite, .
vithout being an irritant."
Le of food with pure coffee
l drink Hero at will and
> advanced more than any
ce of chicory is low, conse
and strength of chicory reHero
goes twice as far as
Durself and your family of
s pure and sanitary. Our
s packed in sealed tins, for
. purity. A trial will con/
ri j. g)?
Wood's Seeds
Fop 1912.
Our New Descriptive Catalog
is fully up-to-date, and tells all
about the best
Garden and
Farm Seeds.
Every * fanner and gardener *
should have a copy of this cata
log, which has long been recognized
as a standard authority,
for the full and complete infor
a?ia%*uil II J^IVCSi
We are headquarters for
Grass and Clover Seeds, Seed
Potatoes, Seed Oats, Cow Peas,
Sola Beans and all Farm Seeds.
Wood's Descriptive Catalog mailed
free on request. Write for it.
T, W. WOOD & SONS,
} Seedsmen, >- Richmond, Va.