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\VIIA\A\sWORh
Entered at Second-Class Postage Rates.
A LITERARY AND DOMESTIC MAGAZINE.
PUBLISHED MONTHLY.
FIFTY CENTS I J FIVE CENTS
FEX YEAR J t PER COPY.
Edited by KATE GARLAND.
iMiario by thi sear talent.
It is the desire and effort of our maga
zine to show the way of living for useful
ness and happiness. If some word ofmine
can make home a brighter place, and
strengthen the ties of love which should
bind its inmates together, my humble la
bors wLI be rewarded. lam afraid that
many of us are crushing life’s sweetest
and fairest blossoms, by our indiderent
and inconsiderate treatment of those whom
God has placed nearest to us, and whose
lives are so largely influenced by our own.
It is strange that we, as rational cea
tures, will thus sacrifice our own happi
ness, and make of ourselves scumbling
blocks in the way of others ; but we seem
prone to overlook the blessings which are
nearest us, and to vainly pursue visionary
objects which will ever be beyond our
reach.
Last month I tried to impress up jn
husbands and wives the sacredness of
their duties, and the importance of pa
tience and consideration in all their re
lations. Their own happiness and the
temporal and spiritual welfare of their
children are so vitally affected that I have
come to look upon this matter of home
life as one of inexhaustible importance.
The greatest responsibility of men and
women, in this W’orld, is as parents; the
training of theii children affects not pres
ent interests a’one, but will be active,
either for good or evil, after our genera
tion has given way to future ones.
But, while thus emphasizing the par
ents’ obl'gations. 1 hope that it will not
be amiss for me to say something to the
boys and girls concerning their duties. If
my young friends who see this, have been
wisely instructed, and have proven obedi
ent to their teachings and faithful to their
trusts, I will be very glad that my sug
gestions are not needed by them, and ask
that they be received as words of com
mendation for loyalty to the right. If
you, dear boys and girls, have been
thoughtless or careless of your manners,
and of your bearing toward those about
you—whether it has arisen from lack of
proper training, or from your disobedi
ence to that training—l ask youtobegi'>
at once to do your full part towards giv
ing pleasure to your loved ones and com
panions.
* *
«
Shall i begin with the boys or the
girl-? Real y, I can’t see that there is
much difference in what should be expect
ed of each; so I think it will be as well to
talk to our boys and girls together. I
know that some persons seem to think
their work should be entirely separate,
but I much prefer to see brothers and sis
ters help one another in whatsoever they
may have to do. Then, again, I know
that some girls and ladies seem to think
that politeness is expected only of boys
and men, but I am going to ask my girl
friends, both small ones and large ones, to
be jmt as courteous as they expect their
brothers and other boys and men to be.
I have heard men speak of meeting sev
eral girls on a street crossing, and, no
matter how muddy it may have been, the
girls seemed to think the entire crossing
was for them, and that it would sacrifice
their dignity to change positions and di
vide the space, 1 was ashamed of those
girls, and I hope that every one of our
Woman’s Work girlswill guard against
meh breaches of good manners, whether
arising from thoughtlessness or selfish
ness.
And then I have known homes in which
the boys seemed to think they were at lib
erty to lounge about the house, or play on
the streets, so lor.g as there was nothing
to be done except helping mother, which
was left entirely for the girls. Boys, I
hope that none of you will do this way.
What if some thoughtless person should
try to tease you by calling you ‘'girlish,”
or by saying that you are -‘tied to your
mother’s apron strings? ’ You can tell
them that you are proud of the distinction
which it gives you, and that you had rath
er have the approbation of your mother
and sisters than to please those vrho ridi
cule you for helping them.
And I have known a few girls—not
many, I am glad to say—who seemed to
think that it would baa reflection on a
“lady” (e-pacially a young lady) to per
form any domestic duties; so they would
sit in idleness from their late time of ris
ing, in the morning, until the frivolities
cf the evening were over, leaving home
affairs to be attended to by others, or left
undone. I have even known two girls,
when their mother was sick and the fam
ily was unable to have a servant, to allow
their father to cook breakfast before going
to his day’s work. Perhaps the mother
had encouraged her daughters in the be
lief that they were too “good” to ba cooks,
and was thus more at fault than the girls;
but I pitied both mother and daughters,
and doubly pitied the poor man who had
to suffer for their combined foolishness.
*
* *
Now, my dear young friends, let us
look at your lives from a practical stand
point. It is a mistake to think that you
must frolic all the while, in order to be
happy. Work is play, if we only make
up our minds to take an interest in it and
do it well. The best way I know for you
to ba happy, and grow up to be contented
and useful men and women, is for you to
do all you can, at all times, to help others
and add to their joys. No matter how
young you may b\ you are either a source
of trouble or pleasure to those about you.
Did you ever think of this? If you haven’t,
I hope that you will do so, and commence
now to assist in carrying the burdens of
others. Don’t make the mistake of be
lieving that childhood is only a time for
idleness. It is a great satisfaction to know
that you have done something to help fa
ther or mother, and you are not too small
to do that. Even the little bird that jumps
among the branches and sings near your
window is helping others, for hearts are
made glad and minds contented by listen
ing to his musical notes. We are all giv
en this lifs for a purpose, and if we faith
fully perform our part, whether we be
young or old, rich or poor, we will receive
the approbation of God and man. I heard
a mother say, sometime since, in speak
ing of her son : “He has always been as
kind and considerate as a son could be;
he has never given me an hour’s trouble
in his life.” What a tribute to a boy I He
has reached manhood now, and is a much
better man by having made himself a
blessing in his home while growing up. I
wish that every son and daughter could
receive such words of praise, and I want
each one of you to make up your minds
that you will deserve them.
I want you all to remember the Golden
Rule, and live just as nearly up to it as
you can. If you do this I am sure that
you will have many friends, and will nev
er feel that life is all made up of hard
ships. Did you ever think that you have
no right to treat others in away that you
would not wish to be treated? This is
true, and it is a pity that we so often lose
sight of it. The trouble with us is that
we are disposed to be selfish. We want
our way, and if we can’t have it, every
time, we fret and fuss and make trouble
generally. Did you ever see brothersand
sisters who were continually disputing and
WOMAN’S WORK.
contending with each other for some triv
ial advantage or unfair claim? lam sor
ry to say that I have seen a few of this
kind. The children quarrel, and sems
times, I am very sorry to say, get into
fights. They have bitter feelings among
themselves, and they keep their mother
worried until she becomes cross, and every
thing about the home goes wrong. Father
almost hates to come from his work at
night, because he expects to And all in a
state of wrangling, instead of being met
by a happy band of children who join
their smiling mother in greetings of wel
come. lam glad that there are not many
homes where such tumult reigns, but there
are more than there should be, and I am
anxi< us to have our Woman’s Work band
entirely free of such unfortunate house
holds. I think that it is so desirable for
brothers and sisters to divide all their pos
sessions with one another, and to have no
quarrels about who shall have the most or
best of anything. The Bible says that it
is more blessed to give than to receive,
and we really know very little about gen
uine pleasure unless we do something for
others. Have you young people ever tried
this? If not, I want you to do so. Just
make up your minds that it will not do to
live for self alone, and that a great deal
more can be accomplished by working for
and with others. How much honey do
you suppose the little bees would ever
make if each one refused to work for and
with the others, and insisted on having
separate interests? Why, the honey would
dry up faster than one bee could gather
materials; and bee-life would baa failure,
sure enough. Then suppose the little ants
quarreled among themselves every time
they began to excavate a home under the
ground. You have seen them carrying
the dirt away, bit by bit, haven’t you?
What if each one waited for the others to
do the work, or insisted on working alone
for fear he might carry a few more loads
than his companions—lo you suppose
their houses would ever be completed? I
don’t think so, for the winter storms
would stop their labors before each indi
vidual ant could accomplish much on his
separate home. It is sometimes well
enough for each boy and girl to take cer
tain duties for which they must be respon
sible; but if every one is inclined to do
right, they may help one another and all
get through sooner and more pleasantly.
If you boys and girls have not been
making yourselves useful about the home,
go to mother and father, now, and tell
them you want to begin to help with
whatever is to be done. It may take you
a while to learn, but' it will not be lon 2
o
before you can do your part well; you
will feel an interest in it, and all the fam
ily will feel better when night comes—for,
one who has done well feels well.
e- *
If 1 were asked to give the secret of
success in life, I think the nearest I could
come to it in one word would be courte
sy. If I could endow each of my young
friends with either true courtesy or abun
dant wealth, I would not hesitate a mo
ment in selecting the former. The truth
is. that man who has money without po
lite manners is poor, for money will nut
bring happiness; while he who conducts
himself with real courtesy toward all men,
is possessed of great riches—for all the
world is friendly to him. We hear many
opinions about the stability or the uncer
tainty of friendship, and it is not unusual
for persons to say that money is the only
real friend in this life. But I want every
one of you young pe< pie to be sure that
you get no such erroneous idea in your
minds. There is such a thing as true
friendship, and it is so closely akin to love
that I think of it always in conneotion
with “the greatest thing in the world.” I
don’t think that a person can ba very hap
py in this life without friends, and I sm
sure that each of you can have a great
number of friends if you will do your part.
I do not mean by this that you must do
just as you are asked to do in every case.
Home may wish you to be hishonest;
which 1 hope none of you will ever he
guilty. Home may tell you that it is fool
ish to be considerate of the old and poor
and helpless. If it is necessary to thus
FEBRUARY, 1894.
sacrifice your convictions of right and
propriety, in order to retain the friend
ship of someone, do not do it; such friend
ship is misnamed, and such attachments
are dangerous to your character and hap
piness. Above all things, don’t do that
which you know is wrong, no matter who
it may please. Dare to do the right, even
if the whole world is against you, and they
who may ridicule you for it to-day will
respect you for it to-morrow. Those who
will prove real friends to you will be won
by attractive manners combined with hon
orable methods in all things, audit should
be your constant effort to make such
friends. Whether in the home, in school,
in business or elsewhere, do not forget to
c induct yourselves as real gentlemen and
ladies; then you will not only be popular,
but you will deserve popularity.
Why do you sometimes hear a particu
lar child spoken of as the family favorite?
Isn’t it because that child is considerate
of the wishes of father and mother, broth
ers and sisters? Why is a certain boy or
girl most popular in school? Isn’t it be
cause there is a smile for teacher and pu
pils, a willingness to oblige everyone, a
frank, genial, sunny disposition, that at
tracts confidence and never disappointsit?
A very easy matter it is for us to forget
the right way, and do things that bring
trouble to ourselves and others; but I
want us all to guard against this, and see
how much more pleasant life will ba. A
manly character is sure to win respect,
whether it be possessed by a boy or man,
and I want everyone ot my boy friends to
cultivate such a character. You know
what it is to be manly; I want you to re
member the great difference there is be
tween a manly boy and a wiannisA boy, for
the latter is a very disagreeable object to
all right thinking persons. 1 have seen a
mannish boy treat one who was poorer
than himself with great rudeness, and I
have seen the poor b>y treat him with
such manly silence that he completely
mastered his would-be tormentor.
A womanly bearing is admired in all
civilized countries, and I ask each of my
girl friends to jealously guard, not only
her character, but her conduct. To be
either manly or womanly is to be gentle,
modest, winsome and gxid. It is to have
good morals, of course; but it is also to
have good manners. 1 have seen girls of
good social standing, who giggled in
church until a considerable portion of the
congregation were annoyed. I have heard
them laughing so boisterously in a crowd
that 1 was ashamed for them" I have met
them on the street, chewing gum as if it
was a very desirable accomplishment for
public display. I sat opposite a young
lady in a street car recently, and she en
♦ ertained(?) me by cracking Brazil nuts
(you know how large and hard they are)
with her teeth. I can’t think of her with
out deploring her lack of refinement,
though I am not even acquainted with
her.
My dear young people, I hope you will
guard against these faults, for just such
failings as these are stumbling blocks
along the pathway of life.
I havo not intended to leeture, for I
hope you do not need lecturing. I only
wish to make friendly suggestions to you,
and ask you to consider their bearing on
your happiness, and your relations with
others. A great many things I have not
mentioned, but you know the difference
between right and wrong, between good
habits and bad. Every boy knows that
whiskey drinking will ruin him; and 1
would like to impress upon each one
that the use of tobacco and cigarettes is
only a few degrees less harmful than
intoxicants. Every boy who contracts
the habit of smoking or chewing is tying
a millstone about his neck, from both
physical and financial standpoints. Ev
ery girl who wastes her health in fashion
able dressing and midnight dancing, is
committing a sin against God, herself,
and future generations. Think of these
things as you grow up; and after you
grow up, I believe you will be better boys
and girls, better men and women, by so
doing. When you are inclined to do some
wrong or foolish act, remember that your
first and greatest duty is to conquer self,
kou must be uoselfi-h; they who live for
self alone must reap meagre returns, and
will leave none here to weep forthem.
You must avoid stubbornness; the brave
and the wise are ever ready to correct a
wrong. You must be charitable; charity
not only covereth a multitude of sins, but
it brings a rich store of blessings which
cannot come otherwise. You must guard
against anger; a soft answer turneth
away wrath. You must avoid moroseness;
good cheer is life’s own sunshine, without
which this existence would be a misas
matic waste.
You must try to appreciate the possibil
ities of true manhood and womanhood,
which reach all the way from the chang
ing, perishing things of this life up to the
realms of Godhood.