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HOUSTON HOME JOURNAL Allowing child to skip chores may have developmental impact QUESTION: I have to fight with my 9-year-old daugh ter to get her to do anything she doesn’t want to do. It’s so unpleasant that I’ve about decided not to take her on. Why should I try to force her to work and help around the house? What’s the downside of just going with the flow and letting her off the hook? DR. DOBSON: It’s typical for 9-year-olds not to want to work, of course, but they still need to become acquainted with it. If you permit a pattern of irresponsibility to prevail in your child’s formative years, she may fall behind in her developmental timetable leading toward the full responsibilities of adult living. As a 10-year-old, she won’t be able to do anything unpleasant since she has never been required to stay with a task until it is completed. She won’t know how to share with any- Daddy's simple truths My daddy never made a lot of money but he made a good living. For him self and our fam ily. The good liv ing came not in the form of dollars but rath er in sim ple truths Ronda Rich Dixie Divas and philosophies that cen tered our home and direct ed our paths. Those simple truths are the guideposts that continue to map my daily existence. He’s been gone for several years now but not a day passes that he doesn’t participate in the running of my life. With daddy, God came first. The rest of us fell into fine somewhere below the All Mighty. “Pray about it and let it go,” he said often. “You don’t need to keep tellin’ the good Lord what you need. He’ll hear you the first time.” “A man who will he to you, will steal from you.” That one was always punctuated with an all-knowing wink and firm nod of his head. That was among the tru est of the things he pontifi cated. “Nothing’s ruder than to keep someone waitin’. Be on time. Otherwise, you’re tell ing others that you’re more DANIELS From page 6A And recent trends are showing some positive chang es. Research by a University of Maryland sociologist reported in September that parents, especially dads, are spending more time with their children now than in LETTER From page 6A or around $150,000 per acre. I think the developer should have been more gener GRAPHIC DESIGNER HEEDED! Looking for someone who would fit into a deadline-oriented work environment in the Production department designing advertising newspaper layout, and special sections. Experience with QuarkXPress, InDesign, and Photoshop is preferred - but will train the right person. Must have dependable transportation, a pleasant attitude, and be self-motivated. Work hours are Mon-Fri B:3oam-s:3opm, but longer hours may be required due to deadlines. We offer a competitive benefits package. Please fax resume to 478-825-4130 -OR- Email to aevans@evansnewspapers.com Walk-ins may fill out application and leave their resume for consideration. NO PHONE CALLS OR WALK-IN INTERVIEWS. THE LEADER TRIBUNE 109 Anderson Ave. Fort Valley, GA 31030 57114 one else because she’s only thought about herself. She’ll find it hard to make decisions or control her own impulses. A few years from now, she will steamroll into adolescence and then adulthood completely unpre pared for the freedom and obli gations she will find there. Your daughter will have had precious little training for those pressing responsibilities of maturity. Obviously, I’ve painted a worst case scenario with regard to your daughter. You still have plenty of opportunity to help her avoid it. I just hope your desire for harmony doesn’t lead you to do what will be harmful to her in later years. QUESTION: What answer do important and that ain’t true. Ain’t no big I’s or little you’s in God’s eyes. We’re all the same.” Daddy lived on West Point time, arriving 10 or 15 minutes early. Me, I’m never early but I’m seldom late. Daddy was right about that. It’s self-centered. “Your word is your bond. If you say it, you do it. No matter what it takes. A per son is only as good as his word.” Sometimes I agree to something that I wish I hadn’t. Sometimes keeping my word costs me money. But whatever it takes, I always do it because I had a parent who instilled in me the importance of integrity. Daddy wasn’t well-educat ed, dropping out of school at 16 to feign for himself. But he was oh so very wise. “Solomon was the smart est of all the Biblical men,” he opined. “He asked God for wisdom, not riches. But, if you have wisdom, every thing else will fall in place.” I often think of one of his other self-written com mandments and ponder how much happier folks would be if they heeded that advice. “Don’t ever get yourself so much in debt that you have to stay a slave to a job you hate.” That one I had to test for myself. Just out of college and the happy recipient of credit cards, I dug a hole for myself, jumped in and cov ered the grave. It took three decades past. Time with our children is a gift of love. They may not realize it until years later, but the invest ment can reap a lifetime of rewards. None of us will look back on our lives and wish we’d spent more time getting “things” done, but we will look back at how well we invested our fives into our ous/public spirited since he developed Eagle Springs at a huge profit. Or even donated the land to the county for such a worthy facil ity. Or sold it at a lower price. - Frank IK Gadbois, Warner Robins you have for those who say being a mother and a housewife is boring and monotonous? DOBSON: Some women see the responsibility that way -- but we should recognize that most other occupations are boring, too. How exciting is the work of a waiter who serves food to customers every day - or a medical pathologist who examines microscopic slides and bacterial cultures from morning to night - or a dentist who spends his lifetime drilling and filling, drilling and filling - or an attorney who reads dusty books in a secluded library - or an author who writes page after page after page? Few of us enjoy heart-thumping excite ment each moment of our profes sional lives. Even the high-profile jobs have their boring dimensions. On a trip to Washington, D.C., a few years ago, my hotel room was located next to the room of a famous cellist who was in the city to give a Dr. James Dobson Focus on the Family years and the untold agony of working for an evil, over bearing tyrant before I was able to purchase my free dom. After that, I swore that I’d followed daddy’s advice and never sell myself into bondage again. I haven’t. Yet, too many haven’t learned that lesson yet. It seems not a week goes by someone will confide how much she hates her job. “That’s a simple problem to fix,” I’ll reply. “This is a free America. Quit and find another job. Don’t be enslaved.” These are college-educated people. Some have Master degrees or even doctorates. Yet, they’re not as wise as my daddy with only a ninth grade education. Wisely, he knew that controlling our pocket books also meant controlling our happiness and well-being. Sometimes I write what I call “refrigerator pieces,” meaning that a column hits a note with readers so they cut it out and stick it on their refrigerator door. They want to be reminded of the column’s simple truth. I have a feeling that this column is going to see a lot of refrigerator doors. Though he’s gone in body, daddy’s wisdom lives on. Ronda Rich is the best selling author of What Southern Women Know (That Every Woman Should) and The Town That Came A-Courtin’. children. Georgia Family Council is a non-profit organization that works to strengthen and defend the family in Georgia by equipping marriage advo cates, shaping laws, prepar ing the next generation and influencing culture. For more information, go to www.geor giafamily.org, 770-242-0001, stephen@gafam.org. OPINION O Come, All Ye Forgetful My memories of decorating the Christmas tree as a youngster remain crys Len Robbins Columnist airpub@planttel.net our decorations in heavenly peace, a fire quietly crack ling in the background. As we hung our ornaments with care, we chatted pleas antly about the niceties of the season. “Mom, can you make the eight-track play ‘Hark, Harold’s Angels Sing’ again?,” I would enthusi astically request. Everyone would chuckle. Me too, even though I didn’t know what they were laughing about - a yKH, pi Rutter featuring Miriam Marchetti, soprano, with harp, organ, strings, winds & percussion Jane Kimbrel, Director of Music Ministries i “My soul doth magnify the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior. ” Luke 1: 46-47 Sunday, iD&cemfrw 9th at 9:CC and 11:00 1002 Carroll Street 987-1852 Nursery provided classical concert that evening. I could hear him through the walls as he practiced hour after hour. He did not play beautiful symphonic renditions; he repeated scales and runs and exercises, over and over and over. This practice began early in the morning (believe me!) and continued until the time of his con cert. As he strolled on stage that evening, I’m sure many individuals in the audience thought, “What a glamorous life!” Some glamour! I happen to know that he had spent the entire day in his lonely hotel room in the company of his cello. Musical instruments, as you know, are terrible conversationalists. No, I doubt if the job of a home maker and mother is much more boring than most other jobs, par ticularly if the woman refuses to be isolated from adult contact. But as far as importance of the assignment is concerned, no job can compete with the responsibility of shaping theme which would become prevalent in later life. When we finished, the tree was breathtaking. My younger sister would then have the honors of putting the angel on top of the spar kling, beautiful evergreen. With these jovial memo ries so vivid, I thought it would be wonderful if my own nuclear family could recreate them as a tradition of our own - decorating the Christmas tree in blissful harmony. It didn’t really work out the way I had planned - a theme which has become prevalent in my life. I had the scene set. Early Sunday evening, soft holi day music playing in the background, a small blaze in the nearby fireplace. We brought in the Christmas decorations from the attic. The problems started when we opened the boxes holding the ornaments and lights. I immediately started try ing to untangle the lights. tal-clear, lo these many years. Some soft yule tide tunes hummed in the back ground as our fam ily hung WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 5, 2007 and molding a new human being. That statement is not particularly politically correct in today’s cul tural environment, but I believe it to be true. May I remind full-time mothers of one more important consider ation? You will not always carry the responsibility you now hold. Your children will be with you for a few brief years and the obligations you now shoulder will be nothing more than dim memories. Epjoy every moment of these days - even the difficult times -and indulge your self in the satisfaction of having done an essential job right! Dr. Dobson is founder and chair man of the board of the nonprofit organization Focus on the Family, Colorado Springs, CO 80995 (www.- family.org). Questions and answers are excerpted from Solid Answers and Bringing Up Boys, both pub lished by Tyndale House. JAe United Aldhedwt Qhmk SxmduaHyQhm presents My boys immediately start ed scavenging through the ornaments. Apparently, it is impos sible for a 5-year-old or 3- year-old boy to hold a round ornament without immedi ately throwing it across the room. It’s irresistible. And the shinier it is, the farther they throw it. I handed the lights off to my wife to put a halt to the budding ornamental base ball game. Meanwhile, our daugh ter had ditched Perry Como See ROBBINS, page nB PQKSETIUS! Get Yours A t rLewis Farms 3 Nurst ... Three Sizes Available in . / Red. White A I'int ; I Call Tim Lewis at 478-954-15071 I - Delivery Available On Large Orders - I 7A 157033