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"A Nightmare in the Daytime”—Page 8.
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VOL UML TWO.
•AIUJiSER
WHAT WE THINK OF WHAT WE SEE
A Pennsylvania woman has written to one of the
papers asking why her hens will not lay. It is
wonderful how some people persist in going away
off somewhere to find what they want. How the
editor of a paper in a great and bustling city can
tell a woman in some quiet rural community far
removed from the circle of his personal knowledge
just why her hens have gone on a strike, is more
than we can determine. The natural impulse of a
right thinking poultry raiser would be to inquire
of the hens themselves.
We wonder if President Roosevelt will denounce
as ‘‘Nature faking” the story reported from
Brooklyn of a child falling from a third story win
dow who was saved from death by the fact that
he was holding in his arms a Teddy bear and fell
upon it, breaking the force with which he would
otherwise have landed upon the pavement. But
then if the child had been playing with a diplodo
cus he would not have fallen in the first place.
Diplodocuses have a natural aptitude for taking
care of children.
The Republicans have always expressed great
contempt for James Buchanan, the last of the ba
fore-the-war constitutional presidents, but they have
better reason now than ever before, since the dis
covery of a letter written by him in 1859, in which
he declines to accept a free railroad pass because
be had conscientious scruples against it. There was
a man who lived before his time. How many leg
islators of a year ago would have paid strong mon
ey to get hold of a similar letter written by them
selves about the time Buchanan wrote his!
at at
A North Carolina contemporary contains an ac
count of a mail carrier living within the circle of
its influence who can eat live coals with impunity
and a spoon. He carries his spoon with him, pre
pared ito eat live coals for all comers at five cents
per. If he gets away with the coal, the nickel is
his for keeps. He has recently posted an offer
stating that for the modest sum of one dollar he
would allow a spoonful of molten lead poured into
his mouth and would allow it to cool there, return
ing the solid piece to the owner. The account
closes with the query: “What can the Devil do
with such a man?” Should it become necessary,
we believe he could do enough.
Had it not been for the firm resolution and
strong common sense of relatives, a Polish wed
ing in Chester, Pa., would not have occurred as
scheduled, last week. It appears that a we'hlb*
is an occasion of some importance under Polish
customs, and a large supply of refreshments, both
liquid and solid, had been provided to make this
ATLANTA, GA., JULY 11, 1907.
Sy A. E. RAMS A UR, Managing Editor.
one a success. The hour was set and arrived. Th
groom, with the priest, was “waiting at the
church”; relatives and friends were gathered in
festal array; the refreshments were in
when at the eleventh hour the bride decided she
would not wed. Arguments, expostulations and
tears proved of no avail, and it began to seem that
the guests would have to disperse without enjoy
ing the feast. This contingency was not to be en
dured, so four husky male relatives picked up the
bride, placed her in a cab and had her driven to
the church, where the ceremony took place in due
and proper form. The feast was all that it prom
ised to be, and all parties concerned are happy.
We have noted many complaints recently over
the increased cost of living. Salaries have, in the
main, remained just as they were years ago, ex
cept those of Congressmen. Prices on all the nec
essities of life have been climbing steadily, and
consequently the purchasing value of the dollar
has gone down; but we were not prepared to read
the statement of a paragrapher that the gold dollar
was in reality only a fifty cent dollar and that if
things keep going it would soon look like thirty
cents. That may seem bright, viewed from certain
angles, but it is so, so far from the truth, we
shudder to contemplate what that young man is
coming to. No gold dollar ever looked like thirty
cents; no gold dollar ever will. During the past
few years they have been steadily looking larger
to us. First they were about the size in general
appearance of a buggy wheel; then they grew to
the circumference of the driving wheel of a Cor
liss engine, and the other night the rising moon,
which is some thousands of miles in diameter, ap
pealed to us as just about the size of the last dol
lar we saw. But that was long ago. Memory may
be over-generous in its estimates.
W *
It has been said that the mule never dies; that
he lives to a ripe age and then undergoes a trans
mutation into some beautiful form of insect life,
thus continuing a career of usefulness to the sons
of men. Out in Missouri flourish the most perfect
mules on earth. So exemplary are they that many
of their attributes are copied by their human fel
low citizens, and mules, people and all alike have
to be “shown” on every occasion. Such a place
has the mule attained in that commonwealth that
quarantine and capital punishment laws have been
spread upon the statute books. In fact there is
a special section of the Code devoted mainly to
mules and immigration. Pursuant to these pro
visions, a mule was recently executed at Kansas
City. It cost the commonwealth of Missouri nine
teen dollars. The facts were these: A Mr. Van
Hooser had a mule named Lady Janett, twenty
seven years of age, who was discovered by the
State Veterinary to be suffering from glanders, a
disease mainly confined to the mule race. The mal
ady was 'too far advanced for vaccination, so Lady
Janett was condemned to death. The matter was
made to appear to the Court made and provided
for such cases. Two appraisers were duly appoint
ed, visited the mule and appraised her at ten dol
lars. The Deputy Sheriff then repaired to the
scene and shot poor Lady Janett. So the bill was
composed of the following items: Appraisal, $4;
Shooting, $5; Paid to owner, $10; Total, sl9.
There is no mention of the undertaker’s fee. A
complete report of the proceedings, including the
court orders, the appraisers’ report, a photo-en
gravure of Lady Janett, and resolutions of regret
will be forwarded to Governor Folk who will prop
erly approve them and they will be filed in the
archives. Sic transit gloria muli.
* H
The way Mr. Rockefeller was treated the other
day by coarse and unfeeling court officials, the im
pertinence with which they pried into his private
matters, and the rudeness they exhibited in wish
ing to know how he got hold of some of his money,
make us fear for the conditions which we foresee
approaching in this country. A land where the
rich are mistreated and forced to submit to pro
cesses of the law just as common people do, cannot
long endure. Something bad will grow out of it,
mark our words. Mr. Rockefeller is naturally re
tiring in his disposition, never more so than when
deputy sheriffs are trying to serve him with a
subpoena requiring his appearance in court. So,
recently, when the Standard Oil investigation was
going forward, he retired to his son-in-law’s home,
where it was quiet and where he could meditate
upon the high themes which constitute his daily
thoughts. Officers approached the home, but Mr.
Rockefeller’s son-in-law, being because of his rela
tionship, superior to the canons of truth governing
ordinary mortals, stated that Father was not there,
had not been there and wasn’t coming until the late
fall. The officers went away —just as they should
have done. It ill becomes an officer of this Gov
ernment to doubt the word of a man of that sta
tion. But one of them was a rude, hard-head*d.
brutal man —probably not a typical American,
probably a recent immigrant—who had a psychic
nudge that Uncle Jawn was around; so he went
back, and sure enough he was! And the process
was served and Mr. Rockefeller was forced to
waste several hours of his valuable time answer
ing annoying questions in a common court room,
overheated by the unpleasantly large numbers of
hoi polloi assembled there out of vulgar curiosity.
There should be steps taken to prevent the recur
rence of this outrage. Our rich men must be pro
tected. Let Chancellor Day denounce it, and all
good citizens join in protest.
TWO DOLL AUS A YEAH.
FIVE CENTS A COPY.