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&3 BRIEFS jan’s Comic Page o - - By George McManus \ . SAY - MAYGIE - r I;ull—T\u NTHBE(}T J’H;Ac\gu‘?ot, W‘MTA:.KND :OTJ Jw‘lqé\?lN:H:g ADOJ o ~row : T KIODA ME? . e . NDOLA‘D' s S ~ ] == ; | CANT LAND ANY TON , = —:__: -f WITH THESE SHRIMPS ‘ 4 ;(05} | | a = = AL | u ’; : N 09, & BN o 2 ¢ o . B M Ve Hea %AR [ 1 - E:' 4: S “:““:‘a. > 3— » A 0 | (0 U ‘N»A e PR K ' E:E’fi A =] (Sl R (BN Ae & flfl; < ¥ g o 2 ¢PP / 7§ = I ‘ :.: ? / ; L// i« Vt/( /'\A V:é’ : / ) i, P, W L . :: G [!{\ N Nog S ’ £ N\ oo [ (T, S LMR SO . . A =&, T o ¢ AN -.,- - :;.é W { / { . - - - By James Swinnerton l T B~ O = i N \\m MOON waS” N =709 \f % 9%‘\ \ MaDe FoROU 4@ Tl (wrymes sack =1 BNG 1T AL -l e g T AE] AR RRE L e S St \\\ ‘\ 7 Z Afl//ll IT eaNT BEff THERE'S NO %2‘652‘5&” : e @ N 7 s TRuE BUT | PLACE LKE |( pINGEEN - < ~\‘\ (\ /N — f vT s! HOME. 1* \ R - T \ \_.\\‘%\{‘\ e i g\‘ 5 o _ . 4 ] v ~ | : §§\§ ’7N X ) '-,/é'}:?:« g ‘@7‘ 0.. ] S\ \ T S 5,"0 ; \\\ AN ~ 0 — : _ 2 O o 0 Q5B 4 Ny ) — 2 e L % weel B el YOVE X T 2 [ 2 \ SN < ; l By TAD o o .——.—y————-—‘-———_ B i | :f“‘lflfi;g | { i | W l lit eY ' H,lf! [ f< i 8 fHHi| i}’,,; | ! ()G:E e 1 eeap N i A BAKYARD ;‘:!i;fz‘é;’l!;"]?' i :H}m*eit;? ¥ ?T‘DK@":\M ‘w"l klll, "i\./lxi‘t | 1 e Re, B v ouY ‘-:_F : /) Furan *\( b va % \ Seu. G murT | ¢ TAT, | / i HES A // HA-HA— /::(?L;:)IN'N" i i uors A (T me DOrLEN ~ \ pAPERS = SHouLD BE i (D PR S RRSS - N ’/- . S ‘ /L . & i YA = = /4 7"? T SR e / W 2 7] - 8 R - ”2" STH - B 7 ,55'1:,. (R = ;.q - s iz ~ér;_ o=l (i 7 ',’,:"44‘- =" W sy, 2 -\ i== i } 4‘/ i i W = {:’} i 7~ T = - 7 £°7% - = B v /‘% ;F\ Y 7/ i q iRI oS o\ .;,‘li. '”,’,,; / e / i il :;// 7 1 Ty - A g T P ey | AHHx' \ ‘l; V' | B % 1Y =y | / N 41 INDOOR_ SPORTS = R SR ; é_:—:-’f.;,dul?ea HELPING A PAL ot o e Y E:‘:E.‘“‘.z% TO SELL A DO G When some people wish to express disdain, they say of a man, “I doa't see what there is in him,” giving one the impression that man is as inscru table in his make-up as a mince pi: at a restaurant. What, Mother, is a “hopeless fool?”’ It is the man, Daughter, who has made a fool of himse'f twice the same way. \What, Mother, is meant by the ex pression that a man has left the earth? It is a description, Child, given to a happy bridegroom. In a very short time he appears to be carrving it on his shoulders, Does it make a man angry, Mother, if another man compliments his wife? Not always, My Child. He feels that others have a right to compliment her, but he feels that his rights are being usurped when others than himself scold her. LILIAN LAUFERTY. Is it true, Mother, that widows are more faithful to the memory of the dead than widowers? Alas, yes, Child. A widow must wait for some man to ask her to for get, but a widower may rush straight from the cemetery into a proposal, tearing off his crape cn the way. Why, Mother, do you insist that a man should make the most of the svmpathy his sweeth -rt gives him? Will he receive ympathy after 1. arriage? Yes, Dear, bu lifferent kind, Before marriage =i 11 be so sorry when he teils he < to work so hard, but after ma: e when he be ging such a tal: ce she will al ways reply: LW heaven you had my job!” Why, Mother, do married men re ceive no compliments? There is ‘an unwritten law, Little One, which says the onlv person hav ing the right to compliment a married Taboid Tales man is his wife, and she never does it because she thinks he is already too conceited. Why is it, Mother, that men do so iittle talking around home? For the reason, Child, that if a man talks he wants to talk on his favori‘e subject, and when he does so every tenth sentence is punctuated by his wife breaking in with, “How about the men?” Is there anything more impolite. Mother, than to interrupt one who is talking ? From a woman's standpoint, no, Child; but from a man's point of view it is more impolite to interrupt one who is eating. What does it mean, Mother Denr, when it is said that “Borrowed finery invites trouble?” It means, My Child, that the spoon bearing the initials of a neighbor al ways falls into the hands of the most inquisitive guest at the party. What does it mean, Mother, when it is said “the punishment fits the crime?” Ah, Child, it means that the punish ment must fit the social standing of the criminal, I heard, Mother, the preacher de clare a man’s sins will find him out. Is It true? Yes, Little One, but they always find his wife at home. . Why, Mother Dear, do you say that women are smarter than men? A woman, My Dear, can do her cooking and take ‘care of a crying baby at the same time, but there never was a man who could keep at his work with a bag of nuts on his desk. Up-to-Date Jokes A man entered an eating house and crdered a steak and fried potatoes, “Yes, rir-steak and potatoes, sir,” said the walter. “And will you have chops and peas along with it?” “No, thank you."” “Roast beef, then, perhaps, sir? The roast beef's very fine to-day.” “No; Just steak. and potatoes.” “How about a nice lobster or & bm§e of crabs, sir, with the steak?” “No." i"Shad roe and trimming, perhaps sir?" “No, I tell you!” “A nice——" But at this point the proprietor summoned the waiter to him. “What do you mean, you scoundrel,” he sa'd, “by tormenting that patron in such an outrageous manner?" “Oh, I wasn't tormenting him, sir,” said the waiter. “l was just trying to make him feel at home. He's a bar ber.” 40 Young Lawyer (having passed his examinations)—Well, I'm glad it's over, I've been working to death the last few years trying to complete my legal education, old Lawyer—Cheer up, my boy; it'll be a long time before you have any more work to do.” - 4 * . A good story is told of Lord Clon mell and an Irishman who met each other once in a New York hotel. On being asked what part of Ireland he came from, Paddy replied: “Well, as a matter of fact, at one time I was one of your discontented tenants.” Lord Cronmell glanced at him in surprise. “Yes,” continued Pat, thoughtfully, “I was. But here are you and I drink ing together, while in Ireland I could never get close enough to you to hit you with a shotgun.” ' * L “One-half of the women in this world retail gossip,” remarked Mr. Stubbs, as he lit his after-supper cigar. “Quite considerate of you not to say all of them retail gossip,” snapped Mrs. Stubb, as she washed the dishes. “Qh, no, only half, Maria. The other half wholesale it.” * * * An old Scottish gardener was show= ing to a tourist the beauties of the loch and of the little village of Dud dingston. It was evening, and as he expiated on the lovely scene and on the glories of his country the moon rose over a hill. The old man stopped short in the middle of a sentence and gazed at the moon in admiration. Then he turned to the tourist and said: “There's a moon for ye! 1 tell ye, man, we're a grand nation!” A corporal in an Irish regiment when on a march in India went to the quartermaster to borrow a camel to carry a spare tent. The quarter master refused. “I have only the cart, and this spare camel 1 am keeping for a case of emergency.” 3 “Well,” said the ,corporal, “can’t you put the case of emergency on the cart and let me have the camel?” * * % “You're terribly severe in your re ligion, Donald. I suppose you think we're going to perdition, and nobody will be saved but you and your min istert” i “I'm not so sure o' that,” said Don ald, thoughtfully. “Ye ken, whiles I hae ma doots about the minister.” * * * They were on their honeymoon, and were staying at a big hotel. One night the man retired somewhat later than his spouse. Arriving at the door of what he imagined to be his room, and finding it locked, he tapped and ca'ed, “Honey!"” No answer came, and he called again, more loudly, “Honey!"” Still he got no reply, and, becoming uneasy, he repea ed the endearing term with still more power. Tais time he was answered. “Get out, you idiot!” came an in dignant male voice from the other side of the door. “This is a bath room, not a blooming beehive!” * * * Olive and Gerald, while out walk ing, met a vicious bulldog, and Ger ald’'s conduct in the next few moments left much to be desired. When they had safely passed, Olive turned io Gerald and said, reproachfully: “Why, Gerald! And you said ydu would face death for me.” “I know I did,” answered Gerald, “and I meant it. But that bulldog wasn't dead.” * * * An Irishman and a Frenchman were disputing over the nationality of a friend of theirs. “1 eay,”” said the Frenchman, ‘“that he was born in France; therefore, he is a Frenchman.” “Not at all,”’ said Pat.. “Begorra, if a cat should have kittens in the oven, would you call them biscuits?” MARRY--Many rich, congenial and anxe ious for companions. Interesting par ticulars and photo free. The Messenger, Jacksonville, Fla. MARRY RICH —-Matrimonial paper of highest charaeter, containing gundreds of nhotos and descriptions of marriage able georle with means. Maliled free. Sealed. Either sex. Write to-day. One may be your ideal. Address Standard Cor. Club, Box 607, Grayslake, IIL HUSTLING man or woman representa tive wanted in each locality; part or full time; $5O to $5OO a month; every customer secured gives you a Steady monthly income; experience is not re quired; only one a{mnintm(-nr in each locality—hurry and be the first to apply. Write the 1-L-1, 1274, Covington, Ky. SALESMEN WANTED. SELI. TREES—Fruit trees, Pecan trees, Shade trees, Ornamentals and Roses. E..sy to sell. Big profits. Write to-day. SMITH BROS,, Dept. 39, Con cord, Ga, 5