The weekly Georgian. (Atlanta, Ga.) 1913-19??, May 05, 1914, Image 7

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~ Wnich Is Our Greater Enemy— Huerta, Who Mocked Our Diplomacy, Defied Our Government and Permitted Our Flug to Be lnsulted‘ OR Villa and Carranza, Under Whose Banner American Men Are Slaughtered, American Women Are Oufwrgye’({ ?L\‘d‘ “}r:\el;isfin Property Is Destroyed ? g - , / s '< /;:/ //'/,//. N v ///// //4 = "\Vfi ,//// 2 4// V/ W S% ~ / / 7/ 41 N /,fiw i 4 @ \ \"v/// "INV Gee N N AN et 7 A /,;gf(/& W T . =% - Iy, 77 IR N, 7 NS / //// ) s ,/a\‘ " 4 /W e //%" t //f’ = } ) , N vl Z 76500 7/ / \ ~ 7 177, RN &:\\‘\ b 0 7, ?’/\'///// // A \ \,%/ R/ N \\\\\\\ % YA al\ Ny . ol A/, /// J-@A J BT \’\\a\/;f" /(&\ f /’/ //f 4/‘D @\ ‘:‘é 4/ ' O\ e ", // WIE . W o 0 [T | / g S - ; (7 J\"@ "iI Ay )l ‘\ ) sl 11/ & ‘:§ g 5/ N :6/ | gAY /‘\-'I% N Z\ S/ VSR o }97» W) AN NN W G2O ) Uil ol 7N ER NS TSR ) 1G SR AL AR o W 7 RS o | A T (W o /;,V@ D s /// A u\\\\\\\\;’ / |oo TV BTV N 7 R\ 4 ;"" W "Jl 2‘»?“"“ =) fi . Tl e \\*s,:’%") iy 4&:/(‘/{/ = AATTE o Up-to-the-Minute Jokes ® I The family were very hard up, had . suffered months of privation, and had received many hard lessons in- do mestic economy, when another little stranger arrived. . “You have a new baby sister,” the father told the youngest member of the family. “Don't you think that's nice?” : “Well,” replied the child, whose mind traveled back over a long period of short commons, “I suppose it's all right, but it seems to me there's a lot of things we need a good deal more!” .. . - It was their first venture at shoot ing, and they were dreadfully keen. Suddenly Casey spotted a bird, and, taking careful aim, prepared to fire the fatal shot. Then Pat seized him by the arm, frantically. 3 “For mercy’'s sake, don't fire, Ca sey!” he yelled . "“Sure, an' ye've for gotten to load yer gun!” “That's as may be, my lad"” re torted Casey, “but fire I must, Be gorrah, the bird won’t wait!” * - - Billy, while being reprimanded by his teacher for some misdemeanor, sat down, leaving her standing. . * * She reminded him that no gentle man should “seat himself while the lJady with whom he was conversing remains standing. # “But this is a lecture,” replied Billy, “and I'm the audience.” - * - Vigitor (consolingly to Tommy, who has upset a bottle of ink on the new carpet—Tut, my boy, there’s no use crying over spilt milk. Tommy—Course not; any duffer knows that. All you've got to do is AGENTS—Hot weather is here. .Make $5O per week selling Imperial Self-Heat ing Irons. Every housewife wanis one. Gardner Flat Iren Co., Memphis, Tenn. THE GEORGIAN’'S NEWS BRIEFS to call in a cat, and she’ll lick it up; but this don’t happen to be milk, an’ mother’ll do the licking, - » - Grocer—What do you mean by sending me only twelve ounces of steak when I send for a pound? Butcher—Oh, I don't know; but il tell you what I did. I lest my pound weight, and so used one of your .pound packages of tea instead. . > * A female lion tamer, soung and fair, beckoned to a big lion, and it came and took a piece of sugar out of her mouth. Sy BEND_ DPERE We s v o . “Why, 1 could do that trick!” ex claimed a gentleman in the front row. “You?’ retorted the fair performer. “Certainly,” said the young man, “just as well as the lion” Britzmnn’s Evidence. In one of the courts a case required the testimony of a young German immigrant. “Now, Britzmann,” said the lawyer for the plaintiff, “what do you do?” “Ah vos pretty vell” replied the witness, j “] am not inquiring as to your health, 1 want to know what you do.” “Vorkl” | “Where do you work?" continued the counsel. . “In a vactory.” “What_kind of a factory?’ 1 “It vog a bretty big vactory.” - “Your honor,” said the lawyer, turning to the judge, “if this goes on we'll need an interpreter.” - Then he turned to the witness again. “Now, Britazmann, what do you make in the factory?” he asked. “You vant to know vot 1 make in der vactory?” . “Exactly, Tell us what you make?” “Fifteen dollars a veek.” Then the interpreter got a chance to ears his daily bread. ‘ | ® Taboid Tales _ o By FRANCES L. GARSIDE, What, Mother Dear, is meant by that term, “Icy contempt?” It is the expression, Little One, that comes into the eyes of the mother of many children when she sees a wom an kissing a dog. ‘Why, dearest Mother, do you insist that a strap hang behind every kitchen door since parents no longer whigflthelr children? . True, Child, but the day is rapidly drawing near when children will be looking for a strap to whip thelr parents. 1 notice, Mother, that when. a guest arrives 'with a trunk at the home of Mr. Jinks, he takeg his small son aside and whispers to him. Is he cautioning him to be good? Ah, Daughter, you do not know the men. He is asking of his son, “Have you found out how long she intends to stay?” ‘What, Mother, was in the paper last evening that made Mrs. Jinks . s 0 happy, and Mr, Jinks so mad? A soclety notice, Little One, men tioned Mrs. Jinks as "Miss ‘Maud Jinks' mother,” and in the same paper there was a reference to Mr. Jinks as “the father of Horace Jinks.” ‘What, Mother, is meant by “Every cloud has a silver lining?"’ ‘When father is a widower, Dear, and dies very wealthy, the gilver lin ing to the cloud is that he hadn’t married a second time. ~ Why, Mother, is there so Htle sym pathy for Pa when he gets sick? Because, Child, man ig 8o inconsid erate as to always get sick 4t the wrong time, deliberately choosing those occasions when there is a dress. maker in the house, housecleaning going on, or invitations out for & party, ‘What M:.Lcer, does a woman mean when she g:* “Isn’t that just like the men?” Anything, anything, Child, so it is uncomplimentary. What, Mother, i# meant by indeter minate sentence? It is talked about openly, Child, when a judge sentences a prisoner and thought of and nothing sald when a preacher marries a couple. What, L‘other, is meant by saying there is a difference hetween a mother’'s and a father's sympathy? +« A father's sympathy for a child in pain, my Dear, depends upon if he ever had a pain like it, but a moth er's sympathy doesn’'t depend on any~- thing. Why, Mother, do you laugh when reading of the latest marriage en gagement reported from the White House? Because it +ghows, Daughter, that even the President of the United States, with an army and navy at his command, is as powerless as a hod carrier when his daughter .wants to make a marriage to which he is op=- posed. What, Mother, is Sympathy? It is that sentiment, Child, the ex= pression of which gives a neighbor the right to visit the home of the bereft and poke into every corner. What, Mother, lis meant by “a one is as wise as an owl?”’ It means, Child, that one does his carousing at night when there is no one awake to see, and looks wise and guperior in the daytime,