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8.
THE UNIVERSITY BUMBLE-BEE.
members of the Faculty so well by
pretending he has more than mor
tal man can possibly do.
Notwithstanding all these facts
the University says she is poor,
barely able to -keep up the current
expenses, and yet permits these
professors to drain out her life
blood. It is sad, but none the
less true. When these young
“janitors” shall have been removed,
then with more force and a better
chance of obtaining their request,
can they appeal to the state for
aid.
WANTS, (Con.)
YAHOO PLEDGE.
I hereby make application to
occupy a room, rent free, in the
Dormitory, so that I will not have
to walk such a long distance to
Chapel services; that I will be
under the protecting wing of the
Chancellor, and that I will not
lose my “dip” by consuming all
my time waiting for the Library
to open.
And, in consideration of this
favor from the University, I sol
emnly swear, on a stack of Bibles
high as heaven, that I will neither
throw rocks at “Riley,” yell “rot
ten Riley,” or shoot at him. But I
will assist in hanging those who
burned him. I will, to the ut
termost of my ability, help
hiring the culprit to justice who
hurled a snow-ball at our great
Chancellor. Upon my honor as a
gentleman, I will carry all the
dead rats in “Yahoo” to “Proty,”
and will not send Potts to the
Dispensary.
Every fly or bug that shall light
upon “Yahoo” shall be fired upon
immediately, and every pencil
scratch on its walls shall be
promptly reported to the Chancel
lor. Moreover, I will raise my
hat, bow down to the earth and
think the Chancellor the only
living man should I happen to
meet him. And I furthermore
pledge my honor that I will not
ring the Chapel bell at midnight
or paint L. C. I. goats, but that I
will attend the Chancellor’s Bible
class on Sunday mornings, and
during the remainder of the week
walk jn his footsteps.
Signed,
WANTED.
WANTED. To know what Boggs
does with the money appropriated for
the Senior reception.
WANTED. The stuttering, stam
mering freak, Proty, to use a text
book. Suffering Students.
WANTED. To know in what
“filthy spot” the Trustees discovered
Riley. Students.
WANTED. A military voice. Shef
field, greasi-commandant.
WANTED. To know why Gibson
didn’t lead English. Juniors.
WANTED. To know who purloined
the Yahoo pledges from my office.
Wm. Ellison Boggs.
WANTED. “Charley” to explain
why Jessie’s ears are so long and his
mouth always open. “Big” Smith.
WANTED. The students to know
that I have a vote in the Faculty.
Col. Jesse Coates.
WANTED. To know who wrote
Riley’s speech at the Alabama ban
quet. Wondering Students.
WANTED. To know how much
beer it takes to fill “Charby’s” bay-
window. Students.
WANTED. The students to issue a
Bumble Bee for ’94. Riley.
WANTED. A cure for rheumatism.
Bocock.
ADVERTISEMENTS.
Publication.
Dr, B. F. Riley has
completed a new work
-ON-
WANTED. To know why “Char
lie” wears long pants while playing
base-ball. Lucy Cobb Girls.
WANTED. To be Chancellor. Dr.
Benjamin Franklin Riley.
WANTED. To know why I am
not popular. Boggs.
WANTED. To preach Commence
ment sermon every year for one hun
dred dollars per annum. Boggs.
Wanted. To know why Harris, a
Tr ustee’s son, gets out of drill with-
. m
WANTED. To know why Riley
didn’t keep on preaching. “Zip.”
WANTED. To introduce Kinder
garten methods in his class room.
Riley.
WANTED. To know what brand of
whiskey it is that ha; a reddening ef
fect upon Sheffield’s nose.
WANTED. A degree. Riley.
DOST.
LOST. All our secrets through Ri
ley’s mouth. Faculty.
LOST. One whole term in English.
Classes 1894, 1895 and 1896.
LOST. Riley;
The Church.
a good Riddance.
LOST. Our self-respect since Jesse
was taken for one of us. Freshmen.
LOST. All the money wasted on
my son, Adam, for one year in Eu
rope. Billy Boggs.
FOUND
FOUND,
se’s head.
A perfect vacuum. Jes-
FOUND. The offices our father
promised us. Bogglets.
FOUND. The missing link, known
to science as Jesse Coates. U. of Ga.
FOUND.
B. F. Riley
“The Negro Problem.”
This book is a most
interesting combina
tion of plagiarism and
original verbosity.
The author is a man
of great reputation,
holding the position of
Professor in English in
the University of Geor
gia, He has sent the
manuscript to ten pub
lishing houses, but on
account of the number
of such works on hand
none of them has
availed itseif of the op
portunity.
Some enterprising
publisher can obtain
this valuable work at a
reduced price.
Old Books Wanted.
Having found myself
obliged to deliver a se
ries of lectures on En
glish Literature, I will
buy all old books on
that subject which are
so but of date that
there will be no dan
ger of their contents
being recognized as
not my composition.
B. F. RILEY.
Notice of Partnership.
Col. Jesse Coates is
busily engaged in writ
ing a new “Text Book
on Physics,” which will
be published about the
1st of June. It con
tains some new and
original ideas. It will
be adopted by the U.
of Ga.
Agents wanted to in
troduce it to Mercer
and Emory.
That I know everything.
FOUND. That I am in bad com
pany. Professor Barrow. ,
FOUND. A new and wonderfully
original way of formulating exams'.
Riley.
FOR SALE.
The University corps
of Cadets, finding its
self able to dispense
with my services as
Major, my uniform,
given me as an adver
tisement, will be sold
at public outcry on
Commencement Day.
(SIGNED.)
Maj. 0. H. Sheffield,
Ex-acting Commandant.
D. W. McGregor and
Messrs. McPherson,
Bocock, Hooper and
Riley heve formed a
compartnership for the
purpose of draining
^eIdocRets or tlie stu
dents.
Mr. Mcgregor will
coutinue to sell books
whiie the other parties
will introduce them in
to the University, and
see that the students
get no chance to sell
old books.
A Sly Old Fox, with
one gray eye and the
other green; would be
very useful also as a
Clod Crusher,
as he possesses the
largest pedal extremi
ties in the world.
This specimen is
dubbed Billy Boggs,
and must positively be
gotten rid of
AT ONCE.