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28 THE ATLANTIA li November, 1922 BREWER’S Capitol View Pharmacy, Stewart Ave. Pharmacy, 453 Stewart Avenue. 231 Stewart Avenue. Phone West 1277. Phone West 1610. Oakland City Pharmacy 705 Lee Street Phone West 2089 “1 he Stores With a Smile” Brewer & Chandler PROPRIETORS Drugs, Sundries, Cigars, Soda Water, Periodicals AT IT AGAIN. Two old English women who had not been on speaking terms were brought together by friends who de sired to patch up their quarrel. There was an embarrassed silence between them for a moment, then one ventur ed, “Well, Mrs. ’Iggins, I wish you all you wishes me.” “An’ 'oo’s sayin' narsty things now?” snapped the other woman.— Boston Transcript. Departing Passenger—This is mis erable street car service. Conductor—Why, what’s the mat ter? Couldn’t you get a seat? “Sure I got a seat. But my wife had to stand up all the way.”—Chi cago Ledger. A minister, preparatory to learning golf, was going around the course with a friend when they came up with two players who were figurative ly scorching the green with cuss words. Discovering the minister, one said: “Please excuse us, reverend. You know how golfers are. We always call a spade a spade.” “I’m glad to hear it, Graham,” re plied the minister. “I was thinking you’d call it a dam shovel.!’ Professor—Look, Martha, at the young man running in haste toward his classroom. The boy must be eager for knowledge. The Wife—But you forget that it is raining, Thomas.—Washington and Jefferson Wag Jag. “And you wouldn’t begin a journey on Friday?” “Not I.” “I can’t understand how you can have faith in such a silly supersti tion.” “No superstition about it. Satur day’s my pay day.”—Pathfinder. O’Hara—And are ye gping to leave this pile o’dirt here all night? O’Mara—Begorra, phwhat will Oi do wi’ it, man ? “Dig a hole and shovel it in.” He—Hey, there’s no swimming al lowed here. She—Why didn’t you tell me be fore I got undressed? “Well, there’s no law against that.” —New York Medley. Teacher—Where was the Declara tion of Independence signed? Willie (after three minutes of si lence)—At the bottom.—Pitt Panther. LET “PAT DO IT” 510 Courtland St. THE LAZIN’EST NIGGER. This conversation was heard on a diner between the head chef and an other chef who was sent on an errand. Being gone longer than the head chef liked, the latter said to his assistant on his return: “Well, nigger, you can go the fudderest the quickest, and stay the longest, and do the lessest of any nigger I ever saw.”—Atlanta Consti tution. As the new preacher of the colored Baptist church was passing one morn ing he leaned over the fence to admire Sam Hill’s flowers. “Sam,” he said, “I understand you have a white poppy.” Sam became indignant. “N-o, sah,” he said, emphatically, “you been hear ing ’bout Samuel Johnson. My dad dy’s black as de ace o’ spades.” The son and his family had gone over to the grandparents for Sunday dinner. Grandpa was in the midst of an argument when dinner was an nounced, and after seating himself still kept talking for so long that little grandson, sitting next to him, finally touched him on the arm and said: “Hurry up and read your plate, grandpa, I’m hungry!” When you tell a man something, it goes in one ear and out the other; when you tell a woman something, it goes in both ears and comes out of her mouth.—Michigan Gargoyle. Mr. Johnson, deacon in the local church, owned drug store in a small town. The church was in need of new hymnals. Mr. Johnson of fered to furnish the much-neqded books provided he could place an ad vertisement on the inside. After due consideration the pastor and church membership agreed to this offer and in the course of time the books arrived. The following Sunday morning the pastor, in announcing the arrival of the new hymnal, said: “I have the pleasure to present to you this morn ing the new hymnals so generously furnished by Brother Johnson. We should be doubly grateful to Brother Johnson, for after careful examina tion I find the brother has refrained from placing a secular advertisement in so sacred a book. We will now sing hymn on page 162. ‘“Hark! the Angel Voices Sing. Johnson’s pills are just the thing. Hear their voices, ever mild, Two for man and one for child!’ ” Servant—There’s a man to see you, sir. Master—Tell himjto take a chair. “He has, sir. He’s taken them all, and they’re moving out the piano now. He’s from the f.Vniture store.”—Dart mouth Jack o! Lantern. “Close the bar and cork all bottles,” shouted the captain as the ship cross ed the three-mile limit. “We are now going into dry dock.” WALK-OVER flktA'{~€vet SHOE STORE 35 Whitehall Street