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The 10 Most Important Things To Tell
Our Sons About Being Black Men Today
To our dearest and most
beloved Black sons...
THIS VERY IMPORTANT LETTER
IS WRITTEN EXPRESSLY TO YOU,
WITH MUCH CARE, COMPASSION
AND CONCERN FROM TODAY’S
MUCH maligned African American
men. We are your brothers, yes, just as
you often refer to yourselves in casual
conversation. But we also are your
fathers, your grandfathers, cousins,
uncles and friends.
This message is for those of you who
are here now, growing up without male
figures of any kind in the household, or
in your respective academic settings. Yet
it is also directed to the privileged among
you who lay claim to many of the ad
vantages that life has to offer, as well
as to Black youth of every social and
economic strata in between.
It’s for the elite minority among you
that society has traditionally embraced
(meaning those who will ultimately serve
to entertain them in the realms of
athletics, or by way of the performing
arts arenas), and it’s for the alarming
number that America has overwhelm
ingly, and historically, written off. We
also speak now to the generations of our
sons that are as yet unborn. THIS IS
OUR MESSAGE, TO YOU:
1. You come from greatness. And
given this simple fact, you don’t need
so-called “role models” to teach you to
be men, so stop vainly searching for
them. It’s time to put an end to all of
the tired, intellectualized excuses for
failure, and start setting your own stan
dards and goals. Our history books are
full of positive Black male images, if
you absolutely must have one to
emulate. But why not be your own role
models? Everyone has choices. You can
choose excellence, or you can choose to
do nothing and fault everyone else but
yourself. Just because one is born into
a disadvantaged household, neighbor
hood or upbringing doesn’t necessarily
mean that it therefore has to be born in
him.
2. Respect and protect the Black
woman. That is, those that respect
themselves. Every Black female
shouting from the rooftops that she
deserves respect doesn’t necessarily
merit it merely because of her gender,
just as every weak Black male hanging
out on the street corner hurling verbal
insults at sisters isn’t representative of
all men of African descent. Respect has
to be earned, individual by individual,
and each entirely of his or her own ac
cord. The Black woman is, however, the
queen and the precious jewel that God
has so graciously seen fit to bless us, of
all men, with. And with a dignified,
respectable sister behind and beside you,
there is no limit to how far you can go
in life (for there is no greater team).
Given all of the prevailing rhetoric about
Black men supposedly becoming an
“endangered species,” or “extinct,”
you’d think that Black men one day are
just going to cease to exist, and that
Black women are going to be forced to
carry on all by themselves. Not so,
young brother. Black men aren’t going
anywhere that Black women aren’t go
ing also, as the futures of Black men and
Black women are irrevocably bound
together.
3. Just being male doesn’t make you
a man. There are those among you who
have been misguided to the point that
you believe that because you are male,
you also automatically become a man at
some magic age. Some of you also
presume that proof of manhood comes
from fighting with your fists, instead of
using your brain, or from wielding a
weapon or fathering children. Please
understand that only the weakest excuse
for a man hides behind a gun. Because
that’s just what carrying one is—
weakness, and an excuse (for not think
ing). Just take a gun away from such a
person and force him to solve a problem
with intelligence and reason, and you’ll
see what we mean.
4. Knowledge is power. As a young
Black man, you must learn and accept
that you are not a “minority” when
three-quarters of the people in the world
look like you. And, you should never
think or allude to yourself as such.
Develop a global perspective when
thinking, writing or speaking of the
African diaspora, work for the re
unification of people of African descent
the world over and thoroughly know
continued on next page
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