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BODY & MIND
Ways To Boost Your Will Power
Resisting temptation is only half the
battle. Here’s the other half. Ways to
boost your Willpower.
An east coast businessman knew he
drank too much. But he had a stressful
job, and a few glasses of wine before
dinner seemed to ease the tension. Wine
and hard work made him drowsy, and
he’d fall asleep quickly afterward.
“One day I realized life was passing
me by,” he says. Instead of the “wine
hour”, he decided to spend more time
with his son. It was tough at first. He
missed the relaxing drink, but he told
himself he was gaining, not losing,
something. He was right. The more
rewarding family relationship recharged
his energies for work better than wine
ever had.
For every hurdle we want to
overcome, we need willpower. For every
difficult decision we want to carry out, we
need an inner strength that will push us to
confront the challenge and keep us going.
Yet all too often we come up short and
lament, “I just don’t have enough
willpower.”
The fact is. willpower isn’t some
immutable trait we’re either born with or
not. It is a skill that can be developed,
strengthened and targeted to help us
achieve our goals.
“The dictionary defines willpower as
control of one’s impulses and actions.
The key words are power and control.
The power is there, but you have to
control it.” Here. Alan Marlatt, a
psychologist studying how willpower
helps people break habits and change
their lives, and other experts, show us
how to do just that.
Be positive. Don’t confuse willpower
with self-denial. Willpower is most
dynamic when applied to positive,
uplifting purposes. Positive willpower
helps to overcome inertia and focus on
the future. When the going gets tough,
visualize yourself happily and busily
engaged in your goal, and you’ll keep
working toward it.
Zero-in on your target. Marlatt found
the most successful people to be those
who had the most specific goals. “Don’t
say, I’m going to get more exercise, or
I’m going to read more,” Marlett advises.
“Say, “I’m going to walk for 45 minutes
every morning, or I’m going to read three
nights a week for an hour.”
Make up your mind. James Prochaska,
professor of psychology at the University
of Rhode Island, says, “some people are
chronic contemplators.” They know that
they should reduce their drinking but will
have one more cocktail while they
consider the matter. They may never put
contemplation into action. Try to focus
and mobilize your efforts, set a deadline.
Believe in your cause. If your half
hearted about exercising because you
can’t see the benefits, desire alone won’t
help you into your running shoes. Marlatt
has clients prepare a four-way grid of
short-term and long-term costs and
benefits. By spelling out pluses and
minuses, the subjects find it easier to
muster their willpower.
Feed your ego. Knowing the benefits,
however, isn’t enough, says Prochaska.
The greatest incentive is the desire to
improve self-image and to seize control
of one's life.
“Act as if...” Acting as if you’re
strong-willed can help you be strong-
willed. Keep telling yourself, “I am
determined to give up (bad habits),” and
you’ll succeed.
Expect trouble. The saying “Where
there’s a will, there’s a way” is not the
whole truth. Given the will, you still have
to anticipate obstacles and plan how to
deal with them.
Be realistic. Sometimes it’s best to set
a series of small goals instead of a single
big one. As in the Alcoholics Anonymous
slogan “One day at a time,” divide your
objective into one-day segments, then
renew your resolve the next day. At the
end of a week, you’ll have a series of
triumphs to look back on.
Be patient. A strong will doesn’t
develop overnight. It takes shape in
increments, and there can be setbacks.
Figure out what caused you to backslide,
and redouble your efforts.
Keep it up. A strong will becomes
stronger each time it succeeds. If you’ve
successfully mustered the willpower to
kick a bad habit or leave a dead-end job.
you gain confidence to confront other
challenges.
Adapted from “Ways to boost your
Willpower” by Edwin Kiester, Jr. and
Sally Valente Kiester.
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