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THE WEST GEORGIAN, WEDNESDAY JANUARY 27,1982
Opinion
Make-up Classes
“Snow Melts To Icy Reality: Satur
day ('lasses." Remember that
headline? What about, "Dewey
Defeats Truman" or “Talmadge
Walks Away With Fifth Term”? Know
what all three have in common? All
three came out in print, only to have
the news changed on the same day.
Since last week’s paper, we have
leameo that vice president John
lewis has announced anew make-up
class schedule that will extend winter
from March 10 to 12, without Satur
day classes.
We know what you were probably
thinking: they don’t know what the
hell they’re doing Well, that’s not
quite the- story lewis told the West
Georgian Monday morning that the
school would schedule classes on
Saturdays. He called back Tuesday
Homecoming Parade
Everybody loves a parade. There’s
something about a procession of
floats, bands, cars and clowns that br
ings out the Ix-st of every festive occa
sion Regretfully most West Georgia
students don’t feel that way however.
A recent survey indicated that most
students were riot willing to put forth
the effort to revive a discarded tradi
tion at West Georgia, the Homecom
ing parade Like the annual, The
The West Georgian welcomes
letters from its readers on tftpics of
general and campus interest. let
ters criticizing or praising
editorial stands or opinions are
also welcomed. letters must lx'
signed by the author, typed and
must include a valid mailing ad
dress or telephone number for
verification. In certain instances,
names will lx' withheld upon re
quest. Unsigned letters will not be
considered for publication, letters
to the editor should not exceed 300
THE WEST GEORGIAN
EDITOR Mark McCloud
MANAGING EDITOR Debbie Godbee
EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Bob Havnie
COLUMNIST Jeff Styles
NEWS EDITOR Ellen Wilson
ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Hal p artn(lge
ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Cindy Booker
ART EDITOR Alan Kuykendall
SIGHTS EDITOR Ed lorenz
COPY EDITOR Cherry Caldwell
ADVERTISING MANAGER I>enms Cooper
REPORTERS Allen Adair.
l orry McDumam, Tom Busko, Kim Bosoman, Eric Herbst, Tommy Forest.
Eldred Hightower, George Agnos, Thomas Ballenger, Jimmy Espy, Anne
Wallace
STAFF ACCOUNTANT Judy Wells
PHOTO EDITOR David Edward?
PHOTOGRAPHER John Steed
ADVISER Joe dimming
The West Georgian is published every Wednesday during the fall quarter
except for final exams week. (Xfice hours are from 1 to 5 p in. each week
day.
Subscriptions are $5. per year. Please send name and address along with
payment to: Subscription Dept., The West Georgian, Student Center, Car
rollton, Ga. 30118.
Editorial policies and unsigned editorials reflect the consensus of the
Editorial Board of the West Georgian. The board will consist of the editor,
managing editor and five editors selected by them. 'Hie Board is also
responsible for amending policy w hen the need arises.
Letters
Personal Vendettas
May I use some of your space to
publicly congratulate Professor
Sidney Cook on making 'honorable
mention" in the column which Mark
McCloud uses to pursue his personal
vendettas
Ever since my class received
special treatment from McCloud last
summer, Mark goes out erf his way to
avoid me on campus; whether it is
dislike due to my refusal to be m
timidated when he attempted to get
mt' to throw out the examination
papers of an entire class which he ac
cused of cheating, or because of his
shame, 1 do not know.
1 had considered writing a letter of
protest last summer of his use of the
West Georgian for his personal vindic
tive purpose, but after discussing the
matter with the rest of the class which
he accused, in his “personal column"
of cheating, 1 decided not to.
I assumed that the West Georgian
was being supervised by some more
mature person or group, and that this
use of the paper would be corrected. I
afternoon to let as know the ad
ministration had changed its mind.
But, there was nothing we could do,
the presses were rolling. We apologize
for any inconveniences the story may
have caused.
Although it could be said that the
administration was too wishy-washy
on the issue, we believe the change is
to the better plan. We are also glad to
see the administration considering
the impact of its decision on students
for a change. And while we may lose a
day of class for switching to the new
plan it’s better for the student who has
to work weekends. We seriously doubt
that attendance would be very high if
we stuck to the Saturday plan.
And now, the record is straight.
Unless it snows again...
Chieftain, the parade was discarded
due to student apathy. No one was
willing to put forth that little bit of ef
fort toward something worthwhile.
If that's the way you want it, that’s
fine. But, we’re sorry, ft’s sad that a
majority of the students here are only
interested in following their selfish
pursuits and not in improving the
spirit and unity on this campus
Letter Policy
words and are subject to editing
for style, clarity, libel and length.
The West Georgian also
welcomes guest editorials. They
should not exceed 300 words and
must be submitted two weeks
More desired publication date. All
guest opinions are subject to ap
proval by the editorial board.
I -otters and guest editorials
should be addressed as follows:
Editor, The West Georgian, Stu
dent Center, West Georgia College,
Carrollton, Ga. 30118.
wonder if this is the way West Georgia
students want their paper to be used.
Sincerely,
s/Walter A. Woods
Professor, Bus. Adm.
Editor's note: If I may remind you,
the column to which you referred.
“Monkey See. Monkey Do" 8-12-81,
did not divulge your name, your room
number, or the class you were
teaching. You were given complete
anonymity in order to protect your
identity because the incident was be
ing reported confidentially with
witnesses. The reason The West
Georgian provided you with anonymi
ty was m the hopes that the incident
would be fairly investigated without
causing undue embarassment to you
and the students involved. Since you
have chosen to make the matter
public, you are responsible for the loss
of confidentiality. I am not ashamed
of my actions nor am I ashamed to
have pointed out the misadventures
that took place in your class.
I vowed to never write one of these.
They’re called "bits and pieces” col
umns. Atlanta columnist, Ron
Hudspeth is famous for them. But, I
couldn’t resist. After reading about
some of these crazies, I felt sure they
belonged in Ripley’s...
...Whatever happened to the good
old days of rock and roll? You know,
when the eccentrics dressed in hallo
ween costumes and blew fire?
Nowadays, rock stars aren’t satisfied
with just dressing up in extravagant
costumes, they’re onto bigger and bet
ter things 1 read last week where
British rock mailman, Ozzy ( Osburo
ed) Oslximc was undergoing treat
ment for possible rabies because he
bit the bead off a l>at thrown from a
spectator during a concert. A medical
report at one of tlx* hospitals read:
“Patient bites head off bat.” Osborne,
known for his bizarre acts, also
reportedly bit the head off a dove dur
ing a recent promotion for his new
album His next stunt? Supposedly to
blow up a goat.
Don’t like roadies in your dorm’’
II
You Asked For lt-
By Debbie Godbee
1 never knew when lie was bracing
himself to spring out at me as I round
ed a comer.
When l picked hun up I never knew
if he would dig his claws and teeth into
my arm in a death grip or cuddle up
contently against me
And, I was never prepared for his
midnight attacks on my hair as I
slept
He was one of our family cats. He
was five years old and a huge solid
looking cat with a coat of blackish
grey cotton that 1 used to love to run
my fingers through. But, last week he
died.
We called hun Mischief, an ap
propriate name for any kitten really,
at first, but that was soon changed to
Doodle, and then that was changed to
In a dingy room, lit only by a single
yellow bulb suspended from the ceil
ing, two rather evil looking women sit
huddled over a small, rickety old
table speaking quietly to themselves.
“Ve haf to vait only a few more
short hours until another state has
fallen into our dutches, and ve nil be
one step closer to completing our mis
sion.” crooned one woman.
The other old hag, wearing a
hideous, out-of-style hat low over her
beady eyes replies, "Ya f our glorious
leader will be very pleased vith us.
The vote is only TO minutes away now.
It is too late for anyone to stop us. HA
HA HA HA HA.”
.As their chilling laughter cuts
through the smoky air of the room, a
lone figure appears at the window,
casting a long shadow into the room.
The two women suddenly catch their
breath and begin to shiver.
"No. It cant be.”
With a mighty leap the shadowy
figure bursts through the window and
lands m a heap on the floor. Quickly
picking himself up and bounding
across the room, he gingerly slaps one
of the women across the face as die
tnes to reach into her purse for a gun.
The Difference is Worth Knowing-
By Mark McCloud, Editor
A This and That Column
Would you settle for spiders instead?
According to a University of Florida
entomology researcher, “banana”
spiders do not form messy webs and
are not poisonous, yet they are lightn
ing quick and can eat up to 25 baby or
adult cock roaches per day.
Condomama. No, it’s not what you
are thinking. Newsweek reported last
week that about 500 University of
Texas students have become con
dominium dwellers, enjoying the lux
ury of fireplaces, swimming pools,
microwave ovens and jacuzzis.
Although the fad has hit other parts of
the country, it is especially popular in
Texas where there are a lot of wealthy
moms and dads who don’t have to
spend a fortune on tuition One real
estate firm ad read, “A condo for you,
a tax write-off for Dad.”
There’s good news out of the state
capital That evil old senator from
Smyrna has withdrawn his proposed
bill that would have raised the legal
drinking age to 21. Thompson,
however, will concentrate on tougher
D.U.I. penalties, which is a better
Doodoo because he was always doing
it on the floor or the rug or just
anywhere he happened to be at the
time
Of course we’d be furious with hun
and try every vet’s secret to break
him of his indiscreet habit, but he
learned early not to worry too much
about our attacks upon him with a
newspaper or outbursts of harsh
words. He knew that any such actions
would be followed shortly by smother
ing hugs and petting by the guilt
possessed perpetrator. Finally,
however, he got the idea and he and
the rest of us were much happier
together.
Although he received plenty of at
tention from everyone in my animal
loving family, Doodoo had an affinity
for my mother. (I guess he knew
somehow that as a girl, Mama and her
In Style -
By Jeff Styles
Right Man Rides Again
"I suppose you have a permit to
carry that firearm, Ms. Steinem"
Right Man quips. "If not, you will be
in more trouble than you already
are."
The women shnek and fall to the
floor, stunned in awe by the magnifi
cent presence of Right Man.
Right Man...the dynamic defender
of the upper class. The shining symbol
of justice for the oppressed big
business people of America. The last
vestige of hope for the
ultra—conservative, right-wing silent
majority of our great country.
As we return to the small room
located in a cheap motel somewhere
in Atlanta, we hear Right Man speak.
“So ladies, up to your old tricks
again? Still trying to push that horren
dous Equal Rights Ammendment on
the innocent, unsuspecting, decent
women of America?" As he spoke.
Right Man was good naturedly kick
ing the prostrate forms of the
women's bodies in the short ribs.
“Surely you knew that when I heard
about the ERA vote going on in the
Georgia House of Representatives I
would suspect the work of two of my
idea anyway. In light of the alarming
statistics and tragic stones, isn't it
about time 0 People won’t do it on
then- own. I speak from experience
And while Thompson says he won't br
ing up the drinking age bill, don't be
too surprised if he changes his mind
and tries to sneak it on some other bill
before college students have a chance
to be heard. What’s interesting
though, is mo6t violators caught for
driving under the influence are in the
24-36 age group according to the 1980
Georgia Uniform Reform.
There’s also some good news from
Boston, Mass., for men only It seems
we may see some legislation calling
for men's liberation in the future The
claim is that women didn't go far
enough w seeking equality. Men want
to be equal too.
Quarters, a popular beer drinking
game among college students has
turned into a medical nightmare for
some University of lowa students
Several have had to have surgery to
remove coins which have become
lodged in the esophagus or between
Mischief
family had at one time possessed 28
cats He must have known that he
was in good hands).
So, whenever we would hear that
awful “Raw-aw-aw” sound outside
and we would open the door to see a
tiny mouse or mole or one of my
mother’s favorites, a mockingbird,
clenched in his jaws, we knew it was a
special gift for her. He rarely ever ate
any of his victims.
One of the greatest joys in Doodoo’s
life appeared to be chasing his
mother, my cat Mindy, around the
house and yard. He was only trying to
play with her; his claws were never
out The more he would pat her with
his furry mit, the more she would cry,
and that would just egg him on even
more.
He also enjoyed going to our garden
in the early morning hours while my
arch enemies... Gloria Steinem and
Bella Abzug."
Walking to the shattered remains of
the window he prepares for a super
leap, but first he turns and warns the
women. “I’ll be back to deal with you
two later. First I have to go warn the
representatives that they have been
tricked. Taken in by two of the most
infamous troublemakers in America.
I must hurry. I shudder to think what
would happen if your insidious plan
succeeds."
Streaking out of the window. Right
Man flies directly to the capital. As he
nears the great building he nods in ap
proval at the expensive gold flake that
covers the capital done. He thinks to
himself, “Now that’s the way the
government’s excess money should be
spent. By beauUfying our ad
ministrative buildings we will in
crease the public's (Hide in their
leaders. Too many handouts to
welfare cheaters only cut back on
such noble endeavors."
Crashing through the skylight and
falling like a large sack of flour to the
floor of the impressive gathering of
state representatives, Right Man
screams, “Stop. You must not vote in
favor of this evil amendment. You
the stomach and intestines. The
school has treated 15-20 students since
the beginning of the term. The game
is played by bouncing a quarter off a
table top and into a glass of brew The
person who successfully ac
complishes the feat must chug the
beer or elect another to do so. In gulp
ing the drink, some accidentally
swallow the quarter.
In the past few years, doctors have
discovered some rather unusual
ailments such as "dog-walker’s
elbow" and "sports car palsy". Ac
cording to the letters-to-the-editor
section of the New England Journal of
Medicine, a respectable medical
magazine, other strange ailments can
be included. "Ponderous purse
disease” is characterized by neck
pain from lugging around an
overstuffed purse. Its sister ailment,
"back pocket sciatica,” is a pain in
the thigh caused by a fat wallet.
Another is "Disco Digit”, a pain in the
fingers resulting from snapping
fingers while disco dancing.
mother picked peas, tomatoes and
any other of the ripe vegetables. He
would sneak around below the growth
of the plants and leap outat her when
she least expected it.
On many a summer night during the
five years we had Doodoo, I would sit
out in the yard and watch those glow
ing yellow lights i the only part of him
I could see in the dark,) dart back and
forth as he chased after some un
suspecting nocturnal prey. During the
day sometimes he would race back
and forth across the yard with his ears
layed back for no apparent reason. It
must have just felt good, and it was
fun to watch.
I’ve decided not to grieve over the
fact that one of my family’s most
treasured pets is dead, but I want to
remember all of his comical antics
and loving instead. I think Doodoo en
joyed having us as much as we en
joyed having him.
have been tricked.”
As he picked himself up from the
wreckage and gathers his wits about
him. Right Man uses his superoratory
skill to whip the confused politicians
into a righteous fury. After they learn
ed of how they had been duped by the
considering liberals that were in
league with Steinem and Abzug i who
were obviously part of a communist
plot to undermine the strength of the
American family unit) they are
enraged. When one young democrat
asks, "Why shouldn’t women have
equal rights and opportunities as their
male counterparts 0 ” he is attacked
and tom to shreds by several of the
old guard republican floor leaders.
Right Man nods his approval and
shouts as he leaps through the ruined
skylight, “Once again the evil plots
our country’s enemies have been foil
ed. Now I’m off to Fort Benning to
oversee the military training of those
visiting generals from Ell Salvador.
We have to keep our interest alive
overseas, you know. ”
So with a hearty “Hi Ho Stockman”
he flies into the air amid the heart
stirring cheers of the Georgia con
gressmen. Away to another adventure
and another victory for all America.