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Thursday, May 11, 2000
Everyday Graces
June Cleaver’s looking better all
I ’m waiting for a Mother’s Day when no tant child-rearing is, and that both my sons
one mentions June Cleaver. For 4^ s . and daughters will recognize parenthood
years, every Mother’s Day, media and a lilt is a tremendous responsibility, a respon-
advertisers remind us that modem 4 sibility not easily passed on to others,
women are nothing like June pi **** | In some circles, being a mother
Cleaver. Surprise! i Sky- seems to rank a distant third behind
Was anyone ever like June i lk . career and self-fulfillment. Perhaps if
Cleaver? She stood at the kitchen JyljJt IS' , , motherhood (and fatherhood) were
sink a lot. At her most assertive, she % jSBttmgr honored in this culture, those parents
suggested Ward have a talk with the who consider taking time out from their
Beave. Who remembers growing up Marv Hood Hart careers to care ^ or t ^ ie ^ r children (even
with a mother like that? Our mothers, ' temporarily) would be more inclined to
whether they worked outside the home or not, see that decision as noble, instead of foolish and
had ideas, opinions, character. And they influ- second-class.
enced ours. As long as our culture views caring for its chil-
June Cleaver is no more a prototype of 1950s dren as something mindless, something almost
motherhood than Roseanne is of 1990s mother- anyone can do, we’ll end up with poorly paid,
hood. Television is not the best place to look for unqualified caregivers and parents who find
prototypes. I wonder if those who are so quick to “better” ways to spend their time,
use the June Cleaver comparisons would appre- In a perfect world, child-care providers would
ciate in 40 years being compared to Roseanne. be trained professionals, and those parents who
Of course, what they really mean by the June must work long hours for personal fulfillment or
Cleaver references is that staying home with to pay the bills would be confident their children
children is outdated, a 1950s cliche. The implica- are receiving excellent care. But this is far from
tion is that moms who do so are hopelessly a perfect world. Paid care frequently fails to give
behind the times. children all they need for healthy development.
Certainly since 1950, more women are work- Until we can provide the best care for all chil-
ing outside the home. And nowadays it’s the rare dren who need it, we must encourage other
individual who would discourage a young options.
woman from following her dreams. It’s the Staying home or working part time is not the
extremely rare individual who would tell her she death sentence to a career that many would have
is suited only for housework and childcare. us believe. And, even if a career is derailed tem-
As the mother of two daughters, I am deeply porarily, isn’t the welfare of children a greater
grateful that my girls are provided the same priority, not just to individual families but to
opportunities as my sons. However, I hope my society as a whole?
children will grow up to understand how impor- In order to care properly for our children, we
The Southern Cross, Page 5
the time...
must first regain a respect for motherhood. I’m
not talking about putting mothers on a pedestal.
I’m not talking about considering mothers too
delicate to function outside the home. I’m talk
ing about respecting the profound influence
mothers have on children, and respecting how a
mother’s influence determines to a great extent
what kind of adults her children will become.
Instead of finding dignity in motherhood,
many, encouraged by the culture, consider moth
erhood’s demands a nuisance, a distraction,
something that interferes with the really impor
tant stuff in life. In a Washington Post article
about Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader
Ginsburg, Ginsburg recalled a time when her son
was young, and she was phoned regularly by his
school principal regarding his behavior. Ginsburg
was offended that the principal always phoned
her instead of her husband, so she finally
responded: “This child has two parents. Please
alternate calls for conferences.”
I have trouble understanding a parent, father or
mother, so quick to dismiss a principal’s phone
call. If one of our children were misbehaving at
school to the extent that the principal phoned us
regularly, Jim and I would be deeply concerned.
The last thing we’d worry about was which one
of us received the calls. What would matter to us
is why the principal called.
In the article, Ginsburg was presented as a role
model for contemporary mothers. In light of
such a model, June Cleaver’s looking better all
the time.
Mary Hood Hart lives with her husband and
four children in Sunset Beach, N.C.
601 E. Liberty St.
Savannah, GA
31401-5196
Father John Dowling
Bishop J. Kevin Boland received this letter
from Bishop William J. Weigand of Sacramento:
Dear Bishop Boland:
It is with regret that I inform you of the death
of Father John Dowling, a priest of the Diocese
of Savannah. Father Dowling died Wednesday
night, April 5, 2000, and was buried at Mt.
Calvary Cemetery, Klamath Falls, Oregon, in
accordance with his wishes.
I presided at a Memorial Mass for him at Holy
Cross Church, Tulelake, on Sunday, April 9, and
on Monday, April 17, at 10:30 a.m. at the
Cathedral of the Blessed Sacrament,
Sacramento.
Father Dowling served in the Diocese of
Sacramento since 1947. The Diocese was very
blessed and fortunate to have had Father
Dowling minister among its people. He will be
missed by all whose lives were touched by
Father.
Fraternally in the Lord,
William J. Weigand, D.D.
Bishop of Sacramento
On Elian
Dear Editor:
My name is Steve Scroggins and I’m in the
Letters
Saint Joseph’s parish in Macon, GA. I was most
impressed with your column in The Southern
Cross (April 27)—it expressed my thoughts pre
cisely, though perhaps I wasn’t as kind as you.
I have no particular ax to grind on this issue
although I make no secret of my disdain for the
Clinton administration and abusive government
of any kind. I’m tom about the issue (both sides
make persuasive arguments), but in the interests
of consistency and the law and the father’s
rights, Elian must be returned to Juan. My issue
is with how the INS took the boy.
Steve Scroggins
Macon
Dear Editor:
Where is the humor, the lightness of the
church? It sure isn’t in The Southern Cross. I put
your latest critique on Elian next to Andrew
Greeley’s Web site weekly column and I wonder
if you spend vacations in little Havana. Opposite
observations. Maybe that remark is nasty, but so
was your political column of last week. Maybe
you vacation in George W.’s country.
Maybe the paper could at least have a Catholic
crossword puzzle in place of some of the endless
photos and / or Sweet Jesus paragraphs. How
about more of Kavanaugh and less of Mike
FAX: (912) 238-2339
E-mail:
DClark5735 @ aol.com
Smith?
If I sound harsh, it’s because I am an opponent
of the Mother Angelica crowd. God bless
Archbishop Weakland, the last great American
hope.
Bill Peterson
Augusta
Thanks
Dear Editor:
I am writing to express my gratitude for the
series of historical articles by Rita DeLorme.
These articles remind us of the rich multi-cultur
al history our diocese has. I am sure that I am
not the only one who looks forward each week
to see what piece of our Catholic heritage will
be discussed in The Southern Cross.
Being an alumnus of Saint Pius X High
School of Savannah, I was particularly pleased
with Ms. DeLorme’s article of March 2 that
chronicled the history and legacy of my alma
mater. Thanks to the article, hundreds of people
now know what we alumni already knew: Saint
Pius X High School was an excellent high
school.
Ormonde E. Lewis
Savannah