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Commentary Thursday, September 28, 2000
negative whispers with compassion
The Southern Cross, Page 4
Replacing the
By John McCormack
he one relationship we can never escape
from is the relationship we have with our
selves. We can take a break from everyone else
in our life, including God, but so long as we are
awake and sober we cannot take a break from
ourselves.
We are constantly talking to ourselves, explai
ning the events of our lives. Most of the time,
we believe that bad events are what cause us to
feel distressing emotions or have an attitude
problem. In reality, it is what we say to our
selves about these events that flattens us or turns
us sour.
The challenge is to stop the self-critical whis
pers. As Father Eamon Tobin, pastor and writer,
urges: “A major part of self growth is learning to
firmly but gently deal with our ‘inner voices.”’
To do this, we first must become aware of our
inner critic, and then immediately be thankful
we noticed the negative whisper. For when we
notice what we are doing, it is then that we can
do something about it. So, immediately we must
thank ourselves for catching ourselves. Too
often, the mistake I make is that I criticize
myself for criticizing myself instead of thanking
myself for catching myself.
Then I must turn to God and say: “Dear God, I
have been beating myself up inside, again.
Thank you for helping me notice. Please help
me to love myself instead.” Or some such prayer
as this to acknowledge God’s work in our inner
life.
Then we must speak up and talk back to our
inner tyrant. We must replace the whispers of
self-hatred with sincere affirmations of our
goodness and worth. Perhaps messages of
human compassion might touch us, for exam
ples: “I am a good person.” “I am doing the very
best I can.” “My children love me, I am good.”
“I have confidence in my abilities.” “Breathe
deeply and inhale peace.” “I deserve to be treat
ed well.” “I am a good friend.”
Sometimes a spiritual message will more
effectively silence our harsh inner tyrant, for
examples: “I am a child of God.” “God loves
me.” “Abba.” “ Only say the word and I shall be
healed.” “Thy will be done.” “Be not afraid.”
“Make me your instrument.” Use any short affir
mation you genuinely believe to replace the
wounding words.
Each of us must find our own affirmations that
work. On a good day we may never need them.
Other days we may need to use them seemingly
endlessly as our inner tyrant runs amok. Next
time at Mass, or praying, or reading Scripture, or
listening to music, or hearing a compliment,
notice the compassionate phrase that catches
your ear or your eye. Save it and repeat it later,
again and again.
Put these affirmations that speak to your heart
in writing, and post them around the house or at
work to pleasantly surprise yourself. Incorporate
them into your morning and evening prayers,
again and again. God’s invitation is to stop whis
pering comments of self-hatred and start whis
pering compassion and self-love. All goodness is
from God. Ask his help with this. Every time he
does, thank him.
John C. McCormack, PhD, PC, is a
parishioner of Saint Mary’s on the Hill,
Augusta.
Father Walker
(Continued from page I)
that frailty, temptation and sinful
ness is part of our lives.”
“Father Walker died in the good
graces of the Church. He received
the sacraments of reconciliation
and the anointing of the sick prior
to his death. For all who knew
Father Walker and especially the
beneficiaries of all the good things
he did during his 10 years of priest
hood there is consolation in the fact
that the healing hand of Christ is a
grace beyond all understanding.”
Bishop Boland was to celebrate a
memorial Mass for Father Walker
at Saint Peter Claver Church,
Macon, on September 28.
Deacon Mathis
(Continued from page I)
of Fontana, Sylvia Miller Evans of
Hacienda Heights, California, and
Marsha Armstrong, Karen Allen,
Carliss Mathis and Diane Thomas,
all of Fort Valley; nine great-nieces
and eight great-nephews; a great-
great niece and a great-great
nephew; and a host of godchildren.
The Mass of Christian Burial was
celebrated on September 27 at
Sacred Heart Church in Savannah.
Bishop Boland was the principal
celebrant. Additional services will
be held at noon on September 29 at
Central Union Baptist Church with
internment in Goodwill Cemetery
in Fort Valley.
601 E. Liberty St.
Savannah, GA 31401-5196
More comments on declarations
Dear Editor:
Hooray for Pansy Bird and her thoughtful
response on Cardinal Ratzinger’s declaration! I
was as heartsick and insulted as she was. His
statement returns us to pre-Vatican II and
inspires Catholics and Protestants to distrust
and disapprove of each other, instead of follow
ing Saint Paul’s instructions to concentrate on
what unites us rather than what divides us. I
have been involved an interdenominational
Bible study and have been deeply impressed by
others’ fervent love of Christ and deep spiritu
ality and I myself have been reenergized
regarding my own faith. Cardinal Ratzinger
would keep us separate and unequal. I pray that
his attitude does not prevail.
Jackie Kennedy
Augusta
Dear Editor:
I am a left-of-center Anglo-Catholic
Episcopalian, which means I support Marian
devotions and the ordination of women.
Coming from this perspective, two recent
Vatican actions have disappointed me.
Regardless of what anybody says, I reject the
belief that the “church of Christ ...continues to
Letters
exist fully only in the Catholic Church.”
Ecclesiastical organizations are essentially
human. Rome, although Mother Church, is not
The Church. The Church transcends all denom
inational boundaries. By the way, Anglican
Bishops are within Apostolic Succession,
regardless of what the College of Cardinals
says.
The second issue is the beatification of Pope
Pius IX. I have read about Pius, and the best
thing I can say is that he was much nicer than
Gregory XVI. I hope that nobody considers
beatifing or canonizing the last Pope Gregory.
On the other hand, my former rector and cur
rent bishop, Henry Louttit, once said quite
wisely that all saints have skeletons in their
closets. That they lived and died for Christ mat
ters. My opinion, however, is that beatification
and / or canonization should not occur when a
proverbial closet conceals an equally proverbial
burial ground.
There is an old joke about an archaelogist’s
wife: the older she got, the more interesting her
husband found her. First and foremost, I love
and find the Roman Catholic Church interesting
because of its age and the spiritual riches it has
amassed over the millennia. Its history is the
most spotted only because it is the oldest
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Christian church, so to attack Rome for her his
torical booboos while ignoring those of other
bodies is in error. I wish to continue learning
from Mother Church, but cannot live within her
house. Most American Roman Catholics loyal
ly oppose the Vatican on many issues. If some
at headquarters cannot understand and learn
from dissent, it is their loss.
Kenneth R. Taylor
Cordele
A correction
In Rita DeLorme’s article in the August 31
issue of The Southern Cross, she indicated that
“in Savannah, Knights of Columbus Council
5588 at 700 Christopher Drive and Council 631
at 3 West Liberty Street welcome Catholic lay
men of the city to join the organization as it
continues the work started close to a hundred
years ago.” Savannah has five councils rather
than two that welcome Catholic laymen to join:
Council 10274, Saint Benedict the Moor
Council, 10579, Island Council and Council
10687, Queen of Peace, along with the two
councils mentioned in her article.
This correction should be noted.
Fred D. Foster, Past Grand Knight,
Council 10274
Savannah