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Thursday, October 12, 2000 The Southern Cross, Page 5 Appreciating the humor in daily annoyances B y now we’ve heard all the reports: Laughter is healthy. People who laugh a lot relieve stress and build up their immune systems. In contrast, those who take life too serious ly, especially those who become irritated over small annoyances, are more likely to become ill. For parents of young children, these reports contain both good and bad news. They contain good news because children provide lots of opportuni ties for humor. Babies are often very funny; just looking at one can make us chuckle. Small children catch us off guard by inadvertently saying and doing funny things. And all children are great at finding humor in everything from a milk mustache to Mickey Mouse. But these reports contain bad news for parents as well because children are also excellent at creat ing those stress-inducing irritants which try even the most patient adults. How many parents find humor in puddles on the bathroom floor, dirty socks on the kitchen table, and Bristle Blocks under foot? What happens to our stress levels, and our immune systems, every time our kids forget to close the refrigerator door? So while there’s plen ty to laugh about with kids in the house, the challenge is overlooking the irritations long enough to find the humor. Indeed, household humor is best appreciated when we separate our selves from the stress of the situa tion. The late columnist Erma Bom- beck was a genius in pinpointing those universally funny moments in family life. Her appreciation for the absurdity in ordinary life offered a refreshing perspective. It takes that refreshing perspective to make almost anything funny. Watching your child’s toothbrush slip deep into the bathroom sink drain doesn’t seem remotely funny as it’s happening. But the humor in that mishap, like the toothbrush itself, can always be extracted. Indeed, quirky mishaps often make the most remarkable family stories. Some of the strangest things can happen in a house full of chil dren. For example, my boys used to enjoy hammering nails into scraps of wood near the garage. One time, finished with the hammer, they placed it on the back bumper of my car and went off to play elsewhere. Later that day, running an errand, I drove off, unaware a foreign object was on my bumper. Imagine my surprise when at a stoplight, a dozen miles down the road, someone in the car next to me honked then yelled, “There’s a hammer on your bumper!” It hadn’t budged from where the boys placed it. Had the hammer fallen and damaged some thing, the humor probably would have been lost. Yet even mishaps involving damage can, over time, seem funny. Comedian Jeff Foxworthy speaks to every parent’s experience when, in referring to his family’s posses sions, he says, “If it ain’t broke, it ain’t ours.” And while broken household items are not in them selves funny, parents are sometimes forced into laughter at the absurdity of what can “accidentally” happen to possessions once children are in the home. It took at least a year before I could laugh about the time Katie, then 4, belly-slid across a brand new coffee table and gashed the cherry finish with the zipper of her shorts. The head print denting the drywall that resulted the night Jimmy jumped into bed became amusing only weeks after it materi alized. Indeed, as upsetting as they seem at the time, if they’re not mali cious and no one is hurt, such “acci dents” eventually become family stories to laugh about when recol lected later on. Yes, we parents benefit most from the inevitable mishaps of family life when we learn not to take ourselves and our stuff too seriously. That les son is hard to retain, and we’re forced to learn it again and again. (Yet our children make sure we keep at it.) I was the recipient of such a lesson years ago, when as I finished a column I’d been working on for hours, Anna, then 2, who’d been playing quietly at my feet, reached for the switch on my com puter’s surge protector. Before I could react, Anna pressed the switch, shutting off the power. My column vanished from the screen, lost forever. At the time, I didn’t appreciate the humor of the situa tion. But I’m beginning to. Mary Hood Hart lives with her husband and four children in Sunset Beach, N.C. Mary Hood Hart Lay ministry observance prompts reflections Editor's Note:On November 26 the church will celebrate a Jubilee Day for Lay Ministers. Our diocese in many ways depends on the service of dedicated lay ministers who are both paid staff members and volunteers. In a series of articles Cathy Gilligan, director of the Diocesan Tribunal will explain the scope of lay ministry and introduce you to a few of the lay ministers in the Savannah diocese. his week we will look at some general questions related to lay ministry. If readers would like to ask questions about this area of church service please send your questions to the editor at 601 E. Liberty St., Savannah, GA 31401 (e-mail: DClark5735@aol.com). 1. What is lay ministry? Ministry is the way in which the Church continues what Christ began and still intends, namely, the salvation of humanity and the transformation of the world. All baptized and confirmed Christians receive a call and gifts enabling them to participate in this mission. When lay people carry out Christ’s work as priest, prophet, and king in their own proper way through public activity authorized by the Church, we call this lay min istry. In recent years, a growing number of lay per sons have prepared for and been appointed to positions of service and leadership in the church. Some of the recent documents of the U. S. Catholic bishops refer to such ministers, who often work full-time for the church, as lay ecclesial ministers. 2. Are deacons considered lay ministers? No, deacons have received the Sacrament of Holy Orders, so they are ordained ministers of the church. 3. Are religious brothers and sisters consid ered lay ministers? Yes, because they do not receive the Sacrament of Holy Orders, religious brothers and sisters are considered lay minis ters. Some studies of lay ministers and of per sons preparing for lay ministry create a separate category for religious brothers and sisters. In 1992, such religious constituted 41% of parish lay ministers; in 1997, they were 29%. 4. Will lay ministry make up for the priest shortage? Lay ministers can help meet the needs of the parish and the church, but there will always be a need for priests. As lay minis ters collaborate more and more with priests, priests are freed to do what only they can. Shortage is a relative term. The United States has a much better ratio of priests to Catholics than many other countries. In a recent docu ment written to the Church in America, Pope John Paul II urged pastors to encourage lay leaders in the community. That, said the Pope, “will lead to a better distribution of tasks enabling priests ‘to dedicate themselves to the encounter with and the proclamation of Jesus Christ, and thus to represent better within the community the presence of Jesus who draws his people together.’” 5. What can lay ministers do in relation to the Mass? Lay ministers have long been assisting in the celebration of the Liturgy. They have been acolytes (altar servers), musicians and choir members for centuries. Since Vatican II, lay ministers have participated by reading the Scripture, reading the general petitions, and serving as extraordinary ministers of commun ion. Only an ordained priest or bishop can pre side at the Eucharist. In the absence of a priest, a lay minister may lead a Communion service; but that is not Mass. 6. What can lay ministers do in relation to the sacraments? Baptism is ordinarily admin istered by an ordained minister but in a case of necessity any person can baptize. Confirmation is normally administered by a bishop or a spe cially delegated priest. Presiding at the Eucharist, Reconciliation, and Anointing of the Sick is limited to those ordained as a priest. In the Sacrament of Marriage the couple adminis ter the sacrament to each other; the official wit ness is normally an ordained person but church law provides for lay ministers serving as the official witness when diocesan circumstances are determined to warrant a special provisions by the Vatican (this is generally found in mis sion countries with few priests for many Catholics). Conferring Holy Orders is limited to those ordained as bishops. Lay ministers play a very important role in preparing those who are to receive the sacraments. (Continued on page ! I)