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THE MAROON TIGER
Page 14
1 : SMarom Spice : |
By Hal J. Breazeal, ’34
Sticking To His Major
Stude: Prof, would you kindly show me the way to
the gym.
Prof: I majored in math; you will have to see a major
in geography for that.
Hey, Blake, what’d your wife say when she walked
out on you yestrday?
Blake: She said, “I ll sue you later.”
It is believed that the absence of the “Discorders’
Trio”, namely Teddy, Goffy and “Bear” Robinson, caused
Morehouse a victory over Fisk. If we had only known.
Hooray! for the polite gentleman murderer who while
sitting in the electric chair tried to get up to give the
lady who was present his seat.
The great football player, Geo. Shivery asked the
coach what was he supposed to do when the man came
his way with the hall.
Self-inflated college hoys are always rising in their
own estimation.
Every bride groom knows that the first hundred bis
cuits are the hardest.
When “Square” Thomas wishes to disguise himself
completely he merely puts on an expression of intelli
gence.
“Snout” Lewis has played less football than any
other foot player in the world.
“Past tense of marry is divorce.”
“Cultivated people dig to get that way.”
She: “Is that the moon up there?”
He: “I don’t know, I am a stranger around here.”
W. T. Smith, who is making good with what he has
left, said, “If you don’t he true to your teeth they sure
will be false to you.”
According to a psychologist, people are most intelli
gent at the age of fourteen, before they start to college.
Advertising school of music offers crooning in ten
easy lessons. Easy on whom?
John’s father: “I received a letter from your teacher
today.”
John: “If you give me a quarter I won’t tell mother.”
We find that “Duck” Watson has a temporary loss of
mind.
He came home the other night and put the umbrella
in the bed and stood up in the corner all night.
Hard Boiled Husband (coming home from work):
“Say you! Where is my supper?”
Wife: “Why, Husband, you didn’t leave me any
money.”
Husband: “I didn’t leave you any money? Well,
where is that quarter I gave you last week.”
Wife: “Why-er.”
Husband: “Why-er, nothing, f believe you are hold
ing out on me. What is that over there in that greasy
package?”
Wife: “That’s otdy some lard, dear.”
Husband: “Fry that then.”
Red Simmons said that he is going to Electorial Col
lege next year.
Mother: “James, if you eat another biscuit you will
pop wide open.”
James: “Well, pass me the biscuits and move out of
the way.”
Guest in hotel, phoning down: “Say, night clerk!”
Clerk: “Well, what’s on your mind, now?”
Guest: “Mind, me eye! They’re all over the bed!”
Freshman football player looking over his quarter
marks.
“Well. I’m as famous as Lindv now.”
Soph.: “How’s that?”
Fresh.: “Well, I went down in history.”
The birthday cake was heavy, hut the candles made
it light. Are you asking me?
“Did you see me come in?”
“Yes.”
“Have you ever seen me before?”
“No.”
“Well, how did you know it was me?”
There is no such word as “fale” wrote little Jimmie
on the board.
Visitor: “Why don I you correct him, teacher?”
Teacher: “Because his statement is perfectly right.”
B. M.: “G ee, wasn’t that telephone operator good-
looking, we just passed?”
Lee: “Yes, and she had your number when you said
hello.”
I). A. H ammock likes Buicks as well as Hupmobiles.
Am I telling something?
“Did you like that candy?”
“Yes.”
“Well, the cat didn’t, he spit it out three times.”
F. Abies: “Do you thinks Ford’s money is tainted?’*
Chink: “Yes, it is tainted in two ways.”
F. Abies: “How’s that?”
Chink: “Taint yours and t’aint mine.”