Newspaper Page Text
December 7, 1978
The Maroon Tiger
Page 7
Astrology for Jerks
The Sagitarian Jerk
by Pamela Denise Moore
Do you ever tire of hearing the
numerous flatteries repeated over
and over by astrology buffs?'Here’s
an article, that marks the
beginning of a regular column, that
views astrology from a different
perspective—all in fun, of course.
Astrology for jerks: The
Sagitarian-jerk
Personal data:
element: water (having no shape,
form, or substance)
quality: adaptable (to all women)
symbol: centaur, the aimless
archer
address: 660 Jive Time Joke,
Jupiter, Universe
jewel: himself (as only he regards)
nickname: Egor
intellectual trait: spiritual void
lacking all creativity.
Character description:
What type person is the
Sagitarian? First of all he is of dual
nature as reflected by the half-man,
half-animal symbol, the centaur.
Thus his intellectual nature and
animal nature are constantly at
war, in many cases with the
animal-like nature triumphing.
Thus, do not be alarmed by ihe
presence of marked wallks, torn
doors, or stair rails loosely
attached in the walls, since all of
these things may be evidenced in
some Morehouse dorms. These
things are merely the work of the
Sagitarian expressing his
creativity, while in an animal-like
state.
Furthermore, this animal-like
nature can be of great benefit when
it comes to eating in the
Morehouse cafeteria!—it helps to
establish a repoir with the
numerous rats and roaches who
frequent there, and also with other
beings (that some of you caonsider
inhumane, anyway) who assist in
the daily' preparation of the
gourmet meals (like grits and lima
bean salad complemented with
yesterday’s hors’a le meate).
A Sagitarian lacks precision and
punctuality, thus a woman should
not feel as if she is being taken
lightly when her date arrives
Wednesday for a Monday night
date.
The Sagitarian also believes in
being broadminded, tolerant, and
loving of his freedom.
Consequently, where one, two, or
three women may suffice any
normal man. the Sagitarian may
require several (say, for example,
■200).
and the work will be submitted for
publication in the Agnes Scott
College Choral Series by the
Hinshaw Music Company.
The contest judges are Robert
Shaw, music director of the
Atlanta Symphony Orchestra;
Theodore K. Mathews, director of
the Agnes Scott Glee Club;
William Lemonds, chairman of the
Emory University music
department and Roland Allison,
chairman of the Spelman College
music department.
According to Mathews,
compositions will be evaluated on
the basis of aesthetic qualities,
craftsmanship and performability.
If no entry is judged satisfactory in
all three categories, no award will
be given.
Manuscripts should be
submitted no later than Jan. 15,
1979. A winner will be announced
on or before March 15, 1979.
Information on the specific
requirements for compositions and
on other contest conditions can be
obtained by writing Professor
Theodore K.. Mathews, Agnes
Scott College, Decatur, Georgia
30030.
When did you discover about the birds and the bees
Renee Edwards
Sophomore
Seattle, Wash.
Spelman
“I found out around the seventh
grade and my reaction was I
couldn’t wait to try it.”
Kent Hinesman
Senior
Atlanta, Ga.
Clark
“I discovered when I first started
dealing with women in the
elementary school. It was cute.”
Jackie Harris
Junior
Montgomery, Ala.
Morehouse
“I found out when I was seven and
I thought it was a beautiful
experience.”
“When 1 was about seven and 1
took it veyr seriously.”
T his month’s advice:
Those born under th sign of
Sagitarius should I) begin
preparation today for next
month’s date, 2) seek a deeper and
more binding relationship with
others of similar nature (perhaps
starting in the Atlanta zoo), 3)
refrain from visiting Spelman
during exam week and 4) have a
Merry Christmas!
National
Composition
Contest
The Agnes Scott College Glee
Club announces its second
national contest for compositions
for treble-voice choruses. A prize
of $250 will be awarded the
composer of the winning work,
and what was your reaction?
Pearl Davis
Freshman
Westport, Mass.
Spelman
“I discovered about it when I was
about 8 and I didn’t think of it
sexually; it was just natrual."
Adrienne Baron
Freshman
Washington, D.C.
Spelman
“1 learned about the birds and bees
when I was 9 and 1 didn’t think
about it.”
Sheryl Craton
Junior
St. Louis, MI.
Spelman
Michael Harris
Junior
Montgomery, Ala.
Morehouse
Wendell Jones
Junior
Baltimore, MD
Morehouse
“Ini 969 at the age of 9 and I was so
naive I only knew Birds flew and
Bees made honey.”
Valeri Jean Tart
Freshman
Chicago, Ill.
Spelman
“I kinda picked it up bit by bit and
due to that fact I didn’t have one
reaction.”
Phillis E. Black
Sophomore
Savannah, GA.
Spelman
“My mother told me about it when
I was in the second grade and I
thought it was nasty.”
Laura Newmore
Freshman
Houston, Tex.
Spelman
“My older cousin told me about it
when 1 was in the second grade and
I was shocked that my parents were
doing such things.”
“I found out from the boys when I
was about 6 and I wanted to get in
on the action.”