Newspaper Page Text
Monday, November 11
THE MAROON TIGER
PAGE 10
He Said
Continued
from page 8
She brings
along a girlfriend
when the two of
you go out.
She gives
you the wrong
phone number.
(BELL SOUTH
RECORDING:
"The number you
have dialed is not
available or is no
longer in service ...")
She promises to call back but never does.
She asks for your number but refuses to give you hers.
She asks you continually about one of your boys. ("What's
up with so-and so?")
When she sees you coming, she hides like 007 or pretends
to be too involved in something to notice you.
She calls you only when she's hungry, needs money, or wants
a ride somewhere.
The clincher, of course, ensues when you accidentally
"bump" into each other in public again, and she embraces you
with some half-hearted hug:
- "Oh, my God," she sighs, "Where have you been?"
- "I can't believe you had my address all summer and didn't
even write. Okay???"
- "How you doing? We haven't talked in so long."
- "I wrote your number down, but I couldn't remember what
I did with it."
- "I almost didn't notice you at first. You been workin' out?"
If life were simple, then negotiations in the battle of the sexes
wx^tifuf De simple, as w-di.
over tiiese mvenfav©
efforts by black women to curtail potential dates, phone calls,
and relationships with black men, I have come to one strong
conclusion. A quick word of advice — Ladies, be honest with
unwanted suitors without having to lie or be shady. Many
brothers have been played by four words: "Give me a call."
And guys, if she doesn't directly tell you that she likes you,
then DON'T assume anything.
She Said
She brings along a
girlfriend when the
two of you go out.
Never run your
fingers through an
unknown woman's
hair. The backlash
Continued from
page 8
Carrying a light
object. "You need
some help?"
Carrying a heavy
object. "Damn, that
look's heavy. Your
man should be helping
you with that."
These are only
effective if it reflects
your playful nature
and can be backed up
with something impressive. Which leads to the cut-that-zero/
get-with-this-hero rap, used faithfully by most wannabe
comedians:
Girl on pay phone. Guy: "Your man can't buy you a cell
phone?"
Girl at bus stop. Guy: "Your man couldn't give you a ride?"
Compliments, however, are good attention getters. "You
must work out" or "You have a pretty smile" are nice, if sincere.
Sadly, too many guys accent such statements by unconsciously
licking their lips or looking the woman over, making an innocent
compliment incredibly offensive.
If a woman looks like she wants to be alone, THEN LEAVE
HER ALONE. "Smile, you look like you're in in a bad mood" (I
am), can cause the girl to lash out on any pick-up artist.
Avoid touching. An exposed navel, arm, or back is not an
open invitation for you to touch. Never run your fingers through
an unknown woman's hair. The backlash could be frightening.
A poll of several women concluded that the following were
the worst comments they'd ever heard:
- "Can I have a naked picture of you?" (Yeah, I always
Ca rry ) -——
- "Fine pieces of sh— like you break my camera." (Uh . ..
Thank you?)
- "Can I suck your left breast?" (um, sure)
And the nastiest line of all time . . . "Can I wallow in your
guts?"
The best method is to show you are sincerely interested in
the woman. But if you're only after one thing, don't pretend
your attraction is serious. Just be honest and direct by saying,
"I'm sexually attracted to you and have no interest in
commitment." Her response might surprise you.
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The Party: Another Reason to Put it in Your Mind
Continued from page 8
— Well, now THAT is
justification for us to come
together. C'mon keep it real.
And look sisters, when
you rhyme along to the "you
can lick it, you can suck it, you
can taste it" chorus,
understand that there are
brothers watching and taking
notes. NOTHING justifies
abuse, but there ARE actions
which promote the wrong
idea. Check yourself. My
freshman year, the whole club
used to rock when Snoop
proclaimed, "It ain't no fun, if
my homies can't have none."
Hey, sister, were you jammin'
too?
Women justify groovin' to
Snoop or Tupac by sayin' ,
"Well ,when he rhymes about
b*tches, he's not talkin' about
me." Right. These men make
a calculated decision based on
empirical observations which
makes it ascertainable upon
visual contact to
systematically decipher
between a woman and a 'ho.
Believe that if you will. I'm
here to tell you that for these
brothers, a b*tch is a b*tch and
a ho is a ho and a Spelman
sweatshirt does NOT make
you exempt.
The messages in our music
motivate us in unforseen
ways. Justifying the use of the
word b*tch in a song, justifies
the use of the word b*tch.
Point blank period. If you
accept the song, if you accept
the word, then you accept that
a man cannot see past exterior
or stereotype and will deal
with you two-dimensionally.
Black folk, the party's
over. The Saturday Night
Demon is laying us to rest.