Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

PAGE 20 THE SOUTHERN ISRAELITE March 21, 1986 .S^HbeadwzLes ...Jewelry Designed And Made By YOU! REMODELING SALE 20-60% off All Merchandise No other discounts valid with this sale Sale prices thru Sat . March 29 The Balconies 843-8606 290 Hilderhrand Dr Mon. Fri. 10 5 1 (all Roswell Rd Ik Sat. 10 4. J he Punchline) I FOR THE BEST I OF BOTH WORLDS Ron Weintraub New and Used Cadillacs Best of Europe, Jaguar Hennessy Cadillac Jaguar 3040 Piedmont Rd., N.E. Atlanta, GA 30305 261-5700 Dear JFS, With the appearance below of "Dear JFS," The Southern Israelite is pleased to begin a new monthly feature coordinated by Jewish Family Services Inc. Readers are invited to write JFS in confidence about problems affecting their lives. Professional counselors will respond, either in this column or by mail. !\o names will appear in the naner. —F.ditnr. Dear J FS, We are a happily married couple (25 years) in our late 40s. Our last child is out of school and on his own. We have enough income and we have been looking forward to this time to “do our own thing," as the kids used to say. Here is the problem. My parents have just retired. They are thinking of mov ing to Atlanta. One of the reasons I was happy about moving south was that we get along better when we don’t see each other that much. I love them, but they can be so controlling. They are in their 60s and in good health. I am afraid if they move here instead of staying near mv brother and his family, we will spend the best years of the rest of our lives taking care of them. My husband says it is up to me and he will support my decision. His parents have passed away. What choice do I have? Feeling Trapped Dear Feeling Trapped. Yours is not a unique problem. Thousands of couples in similar situations are faced with the same choices every year. You don't say if you have tried to directly share your feelings with them. Or, if you feel you can. Possibly an educa tional group for couples and fami lies with similar issues could sup port you in deciding what will be best for you and them. Sincerely, JFS Dear JFS, I am 25 years old and a college graduate. I have had a hard time getting and keeping jobs. My employers say I'm a good worker, but also complain I ask too many questions. How else am I supposed to learn? I live at home with my mother. She and my father are divorced five years. My mother works, but never goes out socially, unless it is with me. I’ve recently gotten a job and have had it for a few months. I want to save money and move out. My mother wants me to stay a while longer. I don’t know what to do. Sometimes I am angry and sometimes I am guilty. If I leave she will be ail alone. I am so tired of having to be her com panion; yet, she would do anything for me. Ready to Go? Dear Ready to Go, There are many questions that / would need to ask you before giv ing a rc*.y or no answer. What does your mother want to do for her self? Do you see your father? What do you do for fun? I can say it is hard for all of us to decide what we want, especially if our decision may make someone we care about unhappy. It certainly wouldn't hurt to talk it over in person with someone who can be objective. Sincerely, JFS Dear JFS, I am the mother of a 17-year-old daughter. We have always had a wonderful relationship. In the last few months ever since she was accepted at college in Maryland, she has been provoking me. She challenges everything I ask of her, breaks her curfew and won’t tell me where she is going, or when she will be home. One night she stayed out until 4 a.m. Then, she either won’t talk or we end up in a fight. My best friend’s daughter, who is the same age, does everything with her mother. I don’t understand. Is there something wrong with her? With me? Confused in Atlanta Dear Confused in Atlanta, What you are likely experienc ing with your daughter is her response to the upcoming separa tion that college will bring. Some children cling, some pull away, and often they do some of both. While this is hard on you, it seems to be fairly normal. If this continues, you might want to seek profes sional services to help both of you. For right now, bear with her grow ing pains and allow her the space she needs to separate. Sincerely, JFS We hope in this column to pro vide a forum for your concerns, as Jews and as individuals in a mod- I s I ern complex world. All letters are confidential and will receive a response either by mail or in our column. We are looking forward to the challenge of “Dear JFS” and hope to become a helpful and enjoyable part of your Southern Israelite experience. Send all let ters to: Dear JFS, Jewish Family Services Inc., 1505 Peachtree Road, N.E., Atlanta Ga. 30309, (404) 873-2277. It’s a dream come true. King Springs Village Luxury Retirement Community 404 King Springs Village Pkwy. Smyrna. Georgia (404) 432-4444 Choice of: Studio, One Bedroom or Two Bedroom Apartments. No Entrance — No Endowment Fee Required There’s no more dreaming about your retirement or need to search for a really ideal setting for active retired people to live-really live in It’s here now at KING SPRINGS VILLAGE. Your single monthly check includes rent, utilities, maid and laundry service and meals in the elegant dining room. Full time activities director, beautiful year-around indoor pool and sauna are available for your well-being. Scheduled free transportation to local shopping. Come out today and see our beautiful on-site display apartments. Adjacent to the retirement community is a 32-bed professional health care center to provide 24-hour emergency service. Owned By Henry ® Barbara Grossberg Israel ® Yetra Goldberg Kosher Meals Available Upon Request BATHROOMS SHOULDN'T BE BORING M : : AA Complete bathroom renovations Plumbing repairs & installation Shower pans replaced ■at.iniii.iiia i.-inria MAKING DREAMS COME TRUE (404)971-8162 mm MARK BRESSLER LYNN BRESSLER VASTER r*LUMBER JOURNEYMAN PLUMEtl R OESIC.NER/BUILDER DESIGN SPECIALIST