Newspaper Page Text
Speiman Spotlight
Page 5
April 20, 1982
Enrichment And Support Program
Spelman’s Phase 4 Activities Progress
Games Mother
Never Taught Us
By Emily L. Patterson
Reporter
March 23, 1982 was Graduate
and Professional School Day at
Speiman. from 9:00 a.m. to 3:00
p.m., in the Upper Concourse of
the Manley Center, information
was provided by the Career
Counseling Department. The
information was provided for the
benefit of undergraduate and
graduate students, particularly
juniors, to make them conscious
of the necessary preparations for
graduate and professional
schools. There were booklets
and pamphlets that discussed the
requirements for entrance ex
ams such as the Law School
Admission Test (LSAT), the
Medical College Admission Test
(MCAT), the Graduate Manage
ment Admissions Test (GMAT),
the Graduate Record Exam
(GRE), which is required for
entrance into most graduate
programs, and others. Hints on
preparing the Financial Aid
Application were available also.
One particularly informative
pamphlet was one consisting of
questions and answers concer
ning law school.
There was much information
provided by the Atlanta Univer
> • *•
s - v
r
1 * *
I - 'ir-.
- * -■ X
a*?
-I
!
~ *i r *.
sity, especially the School of
Business. Tom Sellers, Harvard
University representative for the
Kennedy School of Government
offered information about
careers in Public Service. There
were also facts about summer
programs and financial aid.
Career counselors, Barbara
Brown and Peggy White offered
helpful guidelines to assist
students in their planning. They
suggested that students research
various institutions in order to
make good, informed decisions.
“The earlier we can get to
students the better it is ..." Ms.
White commented.
The student response to this
effort was generous. Kimberly
Packer, a Speiman junior,
remarked, “This was very infor
mative for me. It increased my
knowledge on how to properly
pursue admittance to graduate
school.” Gayle Branson, another
member of the junior class,
commented, “It gave me infor
mation on the qualifications, the
requirements necessary, and
what steps to take in getting
additional information about
By Yolanda D. Williamson
On March 25, 1982, the office
of Life Planning presented a
seminar entitled, “Games
Mother Never Taught You.” The
seminar was conducted by Ms.
Cynthia Cuyjet, District Sales
Manager, Avon Products Incor
porated.
Ms. Cuyjet’s talk expounded
on the “ins” and "outs” of the
corporate world. She related her
success in the business world and
discussed the use of networking.
Networking is the process of
people already on the "inside”
of the company, giving inside
information that helps aspiring
business people make it in the
corporate world.
The talk also shed light on the
business - world game of cor
porate politics, whose objectives
are money and power. Cor
porate politics are those tactics
that are used to help one
become successful in the cor
porate environment. These
games include networking, get
ting to know the expectations of
the job one is seeking, learning
the art of making a good impres
sion in interviews, and* other
tactics influential in increasing
success. As in any game, perfec
tion comes with practice, and as
Ms. Cuyjet stated, “Black women
should start playing immediate
ly-’’
Ms. Cuyjet was asked if the
cliche, “It's not what you know,
but who you know,” is still a
dominant factor in determining
success. Her answer was yes, but
she added, that what you know %
matters just as much as who you
know, because the competition
in today’s business world is high,
and one should be well prepared
in all aspects.
The seminar was well attend
ed, and proved to be very
enlightening. Those who missed
it, especially future business -
women, really missed a great
deal of useful information.
graduate school.”
Counselor Barbara Brown
added that there will be a Mini -
Recruitment on April 6, 1982 at
Speiman. This will be sponsored
by the Atlanta University
departments of Library Science
and Social Work.
Brown Bag Seminar...
Black/Male Relationships
By Veronica Peggy Green
Reporter
An energetic program on the
topic of Black Male/ Female
Relationships was presented by
the Speiman College Office of
Life Planning, The Continuing
Education Program, and the
recently established Women’s
Center, on march seventeenth in
the conference room of Manley
Center. It was the second
“Brown Bag Seminar” on this
topic.
Dr. Henry Braddock and Dr.
Sharon Robinson were the guest
speakers for the afternoon. Dr.
Braddock is a well known clinical
psychologist with the Fulton
County Mental Health Division.
He has done substantial work in
the areas of adults, adolescences,
and sexuality. Dr. Robinson is a
consulting psychologist and
Regional Mental Health Coor
dinator of Westinghouse Health
Systems. She also works with the
Headstart Health Consultation
Projects which include an area of
eight states.
Dr. Robinson began by stating
that relationships should be
based on reality. Many dates
and/ or relationships begin in
the mirror as people spend hours
getting dressed and rehearsing
how they feel they should act. An
individual can often sense and
figure out the type of behavior
that is required of him/ her so
they will fit into the groove of the
relationship. In doing this, the
person is dealing with images of
what and who the other person
most desires them to be. She
reminded us of the many things a
person could be depending on
how much the individual is
willing to change. Be yourself as
opposed to being an image
which is an illusion. Everyone
wants to be liked, and for this
reason they put on masks. The
fear of rejection wastes a lot of
valuable time.
“A healthy way to start a first
date is by talking,” noted Dr.
Robinson. In many instances,
people go through relationships
not knowing the other person,
and never having had a serious
conversation. The couple will
usually begin the first date by
going out somewhere, and
watching something whether it is
a movie, concert, or the theatre.
Dr. Robinson commented that
they focus their attentions on
something other than each
other. The purpose of dating is to
find out what you want. Itisasort
of data gathering experience.
People spend more time
searching for clothes and shoes
for their dates, rather than
spending time getting to know
their date.
You cannot love what you do
not know. At some point it will
become imperative to be
yourself. Dr. Robinson pointed
out that a lot of problems begin
at this point. People get to know
each other when it is too late.
Once you are engaged and
married, it is too late to get to
know someone. At this point,
couples find out their mates do
not want children when they do,
they cannot agree on the intend
ed family size, and how often
they want to have sex.
An individual cannot meet
and satisfy all of your needs.
Therefore, having friends is
considered healthy. Males can
have female friends, and
likewise, females can have male
friends. A friend of the opposite
sex may be able to provide an
insight that you might not have
received elsewhere. Dr. Robin
son said there is no such thing as
a perfect person. In the ideal
relationship, a person loves you
and can-live with your imperfec
tions. And likewise the other
person does not come faultless.
Dr. Robinson said that we
were all raised upon a fairytale
Cinderella story. And all of us
look for that Cinderella who will
fit the slipper or that knight in
Black shining armor. However,
reality says that nothing is
promised. It takes more work to
keep it going than to get it going.
And compromise is not a dirty
word.
Dr. Braddock stated that a
relationship is like a bank ac
count. If you do not make
deposits, it is impossible to
withdraw. He defined friends as
“people who know you but like
you anyway." When a friendship
involves individuals of the op
posite sex, there is an intense
pressure to attach a label or
name to the relationship. As
soon as a boundary is put around
something, its expansion is cut
off. You have often heard people
say, “We are just friends.” This is
belittling the relationship. We
also have to be willing to be with
someone without expecting to
gain something.
The fairytale story about Little
Red Ridinghood was explained
as an early socialization
mechanism that taught little girls
to look for somebody to protect
and take care of them. Dr.
Braddock noted that in reality,
you do not need anyone to take
care of you. You can take care of
yourself.
Dr. Braddock also said that we
should think about what we
expect the relationship to be,
and why we are dating. Is every
date a screen test for the role of
leading man? One of Dr. Brad-
dock’s sayings is, “If you need
something, you do not love it at
the same time.” You need water
and food, but do you love those
things? Almost anyone can take
you out for a nighton the town.
But it is the time spent together
with your partner that truly
counts. Ask yourself what is the
quality of the experience? When
asked about feeling guilty when
breaking up with someone, an
associate of Dr. Braddock’s said
that guilt is a learned behavior.
Just start practicing not feeling
guilty.
Have you ever taken notice of
how some people say ‘my man,’
'my lady,’ and ‘shedoes not want
Miss X to take him from her
because he is hers?’ Dr. Brad
dock asked the question, are
people objects that we can place
the label of ownership on? We
did not go into a store and
purchase that particular item or
individual.
‘You upset me,’ ‘you broke my
heart,’ and 'you hurt me,’ but in
reality, ‘you’ did not do anything.
He or she may have told this
person something or may have
done something to do this
person. However, that person
made his/her own decision, in
his/her own mind, based on the
situation. It is all in the way one
perceives the situation. The
other person may be saying, ‘ I do
not think I broke his/her heart.
Although, he/she may have
taken it that way.’
In parting, Dr. Braddock re
quests that you define what you
want a particular relationship to
be. He also stated that “if you
want to find the one in your life,
use a mirror and not a
telescope.”