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Growing older
Reflecting on the marriage scene
By Lou Cottin
People of our age who have
been married a long time usual
ly read divorce statistics with
indifference or with a mild tsk
tsk. The data doesn’t concern us
unless one of our own sons or
daughters is, or has been, in
volved in divorce proceedings.
Then there is heartbreak. We
suffer deeply with our divorced
children. We cannot comfort
them.
Also, we experience an un
easy sense of doubt and guilt.
Sure enough, we ll get some
blame. If we approved the
marriage, we ll be told, “You
should have warned me.” If we
objected to the marriage, the
charge will be, “What chance
did we have with you nagging
day and night against my wife
(or husband)?” If we arrange
the marriage — “Ouch.”
The fact is that in a majority
of present-day divorces, we
older people are not to blame at
all Young people usually don’t
listen to parents the way we
did. Nor do the young think of
Old anger, bitterness flare
in Senate debate on vote bill
By DONALD LAMBRO
WASHINGTON (UPI) - The
anger and bitterness of the old
civil rights battles of the 1960 s
has flared anew in the Senate
with liberals fighting southern
ers over a proposed 10-year
extension of the landmark
voting rights law.
Racing against time to
complete action on the bill
before the scheduled Aug. 1
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Inside view of Carver Road Baptist Tabernacle
Inside view of Carver road Baptist Tabernacle’s new
sanctuary. The church will have dedication services
tomorrow with a full day of activities scheduled. The Rev.
Jack Bridges, clerk of the Baptist Association, will bring
the dedication message in a 2 p.m. service. The Rev. Bob
marriage the way we did.
In the 20s and '3os, when we
exchanged marriage vows,
there were three factors in
volved —a bride, a
bridegroom, and an “it.” The
“it” was marriage as an in
stitution, a really separate
aspect inherent in the union.
Philosopher Immanuel Kant
would justly have called it a
“ding an sich” (a thing in
itself). The words “till death do
you part” were taken seriously.
To that end, we made com
promises. We faced up to
weakness in one another. We
adjusted our thinking. We
rationalized our disap
pointments. We revised expec
tations. We felt — no, we knew
— that we were committed to a
lifetime partnership. It had to
be made to work. Our roles
were established.
Yes, there were many mis
eries. But the marriage held
together.
Now, in our later years, prac
tice has made us more tolerant
recess, Senate Democratic lead
ers Friday pulled the House
passed measure off its calendar
of bills for action and simul
taneously filed a petition to
forestall a filibuster on it.
The Senate planned to meet
today in a rare Saturday
session, and Assistant Demo
cratic leader Robert Byrd
warned there might have to be
“all night” sessions and per
haps even a Sunday session to
break the impasse.
In an unusual disblav of
anger, Democratic leader Mike
Mansfield charged Sen. James
Allen, D-Ala., an arch foe of the
bill, with “trying to undercut
the leadership” and of subject
ing the Senate to “the indignity
of procedural pranks.
“This is outrageous, out
rageous,” Mansfield was heard
telling colleagues on the floor
about Allen’s parliamentary
maneuvers. “What the ... is
I NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISE ASSN )
and more affectionate. We
know each other and ourselves
better. We can look back with
considerable pride at the way
we built and nourished our
marriage. And we’re even
prouder of the style in which we
refurbished it when it became
seamy at the edges.
But present-day marriages
are new in concept. We long
married folks must recognize
the validity of our children’s
aspirations in their marriages.
They don’t think of marriage,
the institution, as something
that will require any sub
mergence of their in
dividualities.
It is a deal between equals.
The roles in the marriage are not
set. The husband is not
necessarily the only
breadwinner. The wife is not in
evitably limited to homemak
ing, baby-making, diaper
washing
Forced ego-building for a
second-rate spouse is no longer
a must for either mate. The
the Senate coming to.”
A bill similar to the House
passed measure had earlier
been approved by a 10-4 vote in
the Senate Judiciary Commit
tee, which planned to report it
to the floor by the middle of
next week.
But Democrats, fearing that
would not leave enough time to
wrestle through the parliamen
tary maneuvers being planned
by its opponents, called up the
House bill to avoid attempts to
block it in committee.
The extension measure would
permanently ban all literacy
tests and broaden the original
1965 act to include Spanish
speaking Americans and other
minorities under its protections.
The basic law, passed in 1965,
sends federal registrars and
examiners into areas deemed to
U.S. farm team to visit Russia
By BERNARD BRENNER
WASHINGTON (UPI) - A
team of American farm experts
is heading for the Soviet Union
today to make an on-site
inspection of the draught
plagued Soviet spring wheat
crop.
Last year a similar team
went to Moscow but returned
abruptly when Soviet officials
refused to allow scheduled field
visits. This time the Russians
approved only part of the
requested tour, but an Agricul
ture Department official said
the itinery of five growing
areas was “satisfactory.”
The three left Friday night —
just a day after U.S. officials
said that because of bad
weather the Soviets may have
to double their planned grain
imports next year to 15 million
tons.
Soviet buyers covered part of
that need this week by ordering
Jones, pastor, will bring the 11 a.m. message. Open house
will be 3-5 p.m. and refreshments will be served to visi
tors. Dinner on the grounds will be served following the
morning worship. The church moved from its West
Cherry street building where it began.
young are more competitive
with each other, more critical
and more demanding of each
other.
My wife, Nikka, and I truly
believe that these qualities are
good for marriage as an institu
tion. Few of us old married peo
ple ever really learned that in
dependence does not negate in
terdependence.
In our opinion, what is re
quired of us as parents of a
divorced daughter or son, is
faith in our children. As the
song goes, they will work it out.
We must even accept with good
grace their rejection of our
orthodox standards. They face
different ideological, societal
and practical difficulties from
those that we did. In the end,
they will surmount such dif
ficulties even if it takes a se
cond marriage to do so
On the other hand, if they use
us as scapegoats and whipping
posts, our best bet is to stay out
of the whole mess and let them
stew in their own juices.
have conducted discriminatory
voting practices against blacks.
It now covers seven southern
states — Alabama, Georgia,
Louisiana, Mississippi, South
Carolina, Virginia, and North
Carolina — and counties in
several other states. It expires
Aug. 6 unless extended.
Sen. William Scott, R-Va.,
whose amendments to modify
the bill were defeated in
committee, called the sudden
move by Democratic leaders
“ruthless.”
Allen conceded to reporters
he could not “block” final
passage of the bill but
maintained that “it’s up to me
to put up a fight against it.”
5.2 million tons of wheat from
the United States and Canada.
However, the forecasts of
total U.S. grain exports did not
change much because other
countries are now expected to
need less than previously
estimated, an Agriculture De
partment report said Thursday.
The U.S. team’s on-site
inspection of the Soviet spring
wheat crop will serve as a
doublecheck on the Soviet
production forecasts on which
U.S. export estimates are
based.
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f AA. <lll II ill 111 e l
) 814 W. Taylor
> MONDAY:
( SUNDAY. DfIACT RFFF
(TWO (2) FREE DRINKS K
) WITH THE PURCHASE BAR-B-U MNUWIIH
/OF ONE 12” PIZZA. half 75* whole 1 50
the m
FAMILY# #
LAWYER X
Is Obesity a
"Disease”?
Unable to reduce her weight by
the usual methods, Kay decided
to try abdominal surgery. The
surgery did help her weight prob
lem. But it also led to a financial
problem: was the cost of the oper
ation covered by her group health
insurance?
The insurance company refused
to pay off, arguing that the policy
covered only “diseases”—and that
obesity was not a disease. How
ever, in a court hearing, Kay de
scribed half a dozen ways in which
the excess weight had disrupted
her bodily functions.
Impressed, the court granted her
claim. The judge said that chronic
obesity can be considered a disease
because it “impairs health and
shortens life.”
If you have health insurance,
the policy may use the word “dis
ease” in defining your rights. As a
rule the law takes a broad view
of what that means, giving the
policyholder the benefit of the
doubt.
Still, not every abnormal con
dition will be included. In another
case a woman sought insurance
for the removal of four impacted
wisdom teeth. But in a court hear
ing, it appeared that the teeth had
been causing her no pain or dis
comfort whatsoever.
Rejecting her claim, the court
ruled that she had not been suf
fering from a “disease.” The court
said there had been “no distur
bance in any of the functions of
the body.”
Os course, the policy itself may
avoid doubt by spelling out the
specific conditions to which it ap
plies.
A man suffering from a severe
abscess tried to collect health in
surance on the ground that his pol
icy listed “boils” as one of the
covered ailments.
An American Bar Association
public service feature by Will
Bernard.
© 1975 American Bar Association
The standing U.S. estimate,
issued July 9, forecast Soviet
production of all grains at 195
million tons, including a wheat
estimate of 90 million tons —
down 5 million from previous
forecasts.
The July 9 report, however,
was accompanied by a warning
that “the weather during the
next few weeks will be
important in determining the
final size of the spring grain
crop which accounts for over
two-thirds of Soviet grain
production.”
I r^dJSMT KTONW 1
Bi SUNDAY MONDAY!
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COPYRIGHT 1975 SUPERx
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PEPSODENT JUST WONDERFUL JERGENS i
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/ Ty; \y~-4 V\ // I Wide Sturdy,
Yv / WnlLWjr < Il polished
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81 \ i iNwy and weather ’
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I SQ99
—if anyone beats our price on \|\ )i| J® .
the same item — we will refund ,
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Page 5
— Griffin Daily News Saturday, July 19,1975