Newspaper Page Text
%icnltnt*, Jllomifiulnmi, &r.
Plank Roads.
The following Extract from a recent report of the Secre
tary of the Board of Improvement of Kentucky, furnishes
Some useful information, on the subject of Plank Roads :
1. The system of plank roads, which originated in’ Russia, 1
has since been adopted in Canada, and in many of our north
ern States, entirely superceded the Me Adam and Telford
rock or gravel roads. r lho great success and al uc ol the
plank road consists in the cheapness, in case of draft, in
speed, and in comfort to passengers.
2. The approved mode of construction thereof, is as fol
lows: For a single track the planks of pine, hemlock, oak.
red elm, black walnut or sweet gum, should be eight feet
long, and from three to four inches thick —they should be laid
across the road at its line. These planks arc to rest on two
longitudinal sills or sleepers, each four inches square, bedded
in the earth to their full thickness. The earth should be fully
kept up to the plank at every point, in order to prevent confi
ned air resting in any vacant space beneath the planks—no
pin or spike is needed to confine the plank to the sleeper, their i
weight being sufficient to keep them firm. Hicrc should be
placed on the upper service a coating of sand an inch thick. ,
There should be provided for a single track turnout places—
and to eflfeet this, an earthen road must be banked up ten or
twelve feet wide on one side, and two or three on the other —
each embankment should be made flush with the ends ot the
plank, and thence sloping outwards so as to carry off the wa
ter, as perfect drainage is the great secret in the construction
of any kind of road. The plank should be laid even, with
part thereof projecting two <>r three inches beyond the gene
ral line of the road, in order to prevent ruts made by the
wheels at the junction of the plank and each turnout. And
If the bed on which the planks arc to be laid is anew one, it
would be better to be travelled one season before they are
laid down. One track, with the supplementary earth road .
thus formed, will be sufficient for all ordinary travel. And.
if the tonage transported on the road be chiefly in one dircc- |
tion, the track should be laid on that side of the road which
wiil enable the loaded teams to keep it, and thereby force the j
unloaded ones to do all the turning out.
3. To make a double track, all that is needed will be to
make two tracks each eight feet wide, or one sixteen feet
wide. The former is preferred. h"i* the sixteen feet track,
three or five longitudinal sills are required, each to be four by ;
six inches, and laid edgewise and embedded in trenches six j
inches deep. These timbers should be from fifteen to twenty
feet long. Great advantage is obtained in the construction of j
the double track with long plank, by giving the road bed a
slight convexity of two or three inches in the centre, and
springing the plank road to the outside sills, and attaching
them thereto by half inch spikes or nails three inches long.
4. The duration of plank roads is from eight to twelve
years. This matter, however, depends entirely upon decay
from rot, and not by the surface wear of the plank—the sand
which is spread upon the track when finished, protects the
wood from the shoe soles of the horses (which cause most ot
the wear) and soon penetrates the grain ot the plank until
the wood fibres and the deposites on the road, a tough elastic
Covering is formed, whereby the plank is saved from the fur- ,
ther wear. Experience teaches that one-half the wear and j
tear of seven years occurs in the first yeai. Therefore, it is a
matter of great importance on these roads to have small toll
age, in order to invite such an amount of travel as will pro
’ . . . j
mote their wearing out instead of rotting.
5. The cost of the plank road greatly depends on itslocali- i
♦y. But it will be found the following estimate will approxi
mate to an average valuation, to wit:
For one mile of road with a single track, made with plank
eight feet wide and three inches thick, will require 12b,b29 i
feet broad measure of plank, and of sills 4 by 4, 14,0t>0 ma
king in all of lumber, 140,000 feet, and costing say five dol- <
lars per thousand, would equal the sum of seven hundred
and four dollars. The laying and grading will cost from 30
cents to one dollar per rod, or from ninety-six dollars to three j
hundred and twenty dollars per mile. The earth work,
ces, bridges and contingencies, admit of no average.^qj ma t 0
Therefore, without them, and one hundred dufiars per mile
for engineering, superintendence; and ed dollars for
gate houses, wo have the total coster mile from one thou
sand to one thousand two ;in ,\ twenty-four dollars.
Project of the Growing Crop.
AVeiutf',l t(J keep our readers well posted in matters re
tfltyfifr m the present growing crops of the South, especially the ■
‘great staple, so that every Merchant and Planter maybe able j
to form his own conclusions as to the quantity and value of
the next crops. To this end wc invite our fitends scattered
abroad to keep us advised of every particular of the passing
season which may*. aid in a correct judgment touching .a
matter that interests every citizen. In the mean time wc
give a few items that have already reached us through our
exchanges.
For the last two days we have had very severe showers
of rain, which has been of great advantage to the crops. The
river has risen since our last about five inches, and is still on
the rise. —Point Coupee (La.) I'jcho April 29.
The Crop of 1850.—Letters received from all parts of the
Cotton region, furnish proof that the cotton plant was never
more backward at this season of the year. The cold weather
of March killed the cotton which had come up in the lower
country, while the long continued rains have put back the
planting in the upper. A large extent of country is under ‘
water on the Bayou Macon, Black River and other streams.
Persons interested, may rely on this, that the prospect for a
large crop was never so discouraging. Our information em
braces the entire cotton region of the M est. — N. O. C i cscent.
The rains last week were very heavy in the interior. All
the rivers at our last accounts were rising rapidly, and it was
apprehended an extensive overflood of the low lands would
be. the consequence. Great injury will of course result to ■
planters, cutting oil’ all possibilty of making any thing like j
nverage cotton crops on the river lands. —Mobile Tribune.
May 3.
We do not recollect ever to have seen the crops as back
ward as they are this season; and, upon the whole, the pros
pects of the* planter are decidedly less cheering than they
were after the April frosts of last year. Most of the corn that
was planted early, was cut down, and is just begining to re
vive. That planted later, has come up badly, or rotted in the
ground. The Cotton is in a worse condition; many <4 our
planters have just finished putting in their seed, and we
do not believe there are one hundred acres in the county
which have appeared above the surface. —R ashington (Ga)
Gazette , May 1.
Many of our country exchanges express fears that the Cot
ton crop of this year will fall short of the last, in consequence
of the late frosts. Many planters, we learn, have been obliged
to replant every acre of their land. But wc rather think it is
far too soon to calculate the consequence of this upon the
eoming crop. —Mobile Register , May 1.
The Ringgold (Ga.) Republican of the 13th ult. says the
wheat crop in that county was netoi moie promising than
at present. The farmers have the cheering prospect, if the
season continues good, of a rich and plentiful jield of this
production.
In this county, with the exception of the grain crop, which
is very r good, the prospects arc not at all flattering to farmers.
The planting season has been backward, and at no period
since that time, has the weather been propitious for growing
crops, for a longer time than from five days to a week at, a
time, consequently vegetation of every kind even in a grow -
ing state has been checked, and wc very much doubt wheth
er the disastrous frost of last year did the farmer more injury
than the continued backwardness and coldness of the present
season. Certainly the cotton and corn crop of May last,
looked not a whit more unfavorable than they* do at this
time.— Sandersville Georgian , May 1.
Tue Cotton Grot.-—The Alabama Chronicle of the 20th
ultimo says:—The prospects of the planter in this section
! are rather unpromising. Many have had their crops cn
! tirely ruined by the late frosts and cold weather and arc at
j this late period compelled to plant over. We are rather in
clined to this opinion, that the crop of the present, will fall
very far short of that of the past season.
Albany, Baker Cos. Ga., April 27.
‘‘l will now give you an account of the appearance’ of the
growing crop. Throughout all of the Southwestern coun
! ties, the Cotton is fully as backward as it was last year, near
ly all of our planters have been planting and replan ting since
the 15th of March, and there is a great deal of Cotton not
yet out of the ground, and lhat which is up, requires close
examination to find it. If a full crop depends upon an early
j start this crop bids fair to be even shorter than last year. r l he
j Flint River receipts fall off about one fifth.”
The Crops.— The cotton crop this season, in this region
is unusually backward. The planters from all direction give
very gloomy accounts. An intelligent planter from Coweta
county informed us yesterday that the cotton crop in that
| county is not only in a worse condition than at the same time
last year, hut more backward than it has been for several
• years. The wheat, however, in the same county is in a mid
i dling prosperous condition. In Henry county both the cot
-1 ton and wheat are very backward.— Atlanta Intelligencer ,
May 3.
The Tennessee river has again overflown its banks, and is
almost as high as it was in March last. It is now about on a j
stand. The plantations on the river have been greatly in
jured, and the planted crops destroyed. This is the third
overflow of the Tennessee this season—each unusually high.
The heavy rains which fell during the last ten or twelve days i
caused all the streams to become impassable. .Flint river was
higher than ever before known. The injury to the growing
crops is of course very great.—Huntsville “(Ala.) Advocate ,
May 1.
Farming Prospects.— The Mari ago county (Ala.) Ar
gus of the 16th ult., says: “The late frosts with the recent
heavy rains have proved fully as disastrous to the farming
interests as did the very severe snow and frost of last sea
son—though the freeze last year was a few days later. Cot
ton seeds are much more scarce and the planters already be
gin to need them. Many plantations need to be wholly re
planted and the proprietors find it difficult to obtain even a 1
third quantity of the seed necessary. The rains washed the j
cotton beds to a level and scattered the seed underground to j
such an extent that the stand would prove worthless even if ■
the seed should come up; and doubts are entertained as to !
the soundness of the seed in the ground. Some of our plan- j
tors have had seed under ground from 15 to 20 days, and ,
have failed to find the sprout aboveground.”
fljr Iteflwjifr. I
Melon Marmalade. —Take fine large citron melons, and
cut them into quarters, having removed the seeds. Weigh
the pieces, and to every pound allow a pound of the best ;
double-refined loaf sugar. To every three pounds of melon
allow two lemons, and a tea-spoonful of ground white ginger. !
Then grate the melon slices on a coarse grater, hut not too j
close to the rind. Grate off'the yellow rind of the lemons j
and add it with the ginger to the sugar, which must be finely ;
powdered. Then mix the whole with the grated melons in
a preserving kettle. Set it over a moderate fire, and boil,’’
skim, and stir it till it is a very thick smooth jam. Put it j
warm into glass jars, or large tumblers ; lay a double round
of tissue paper on the surface of the marmalade; cover the I
jars closely, and tie a piece of bladder over each.
Pumpkin marmalade may be made in the above manner,
omitting the ginger.
Tomato Marmalade. —Take large fully ripe tomatoes, and ;
scald them in£pt water, so that the skins can be easily ‘
peeled off. Weigh the tomatoes; and to every pound, al-j
low a pound of the best sugar; to every three pounds, two j
lemons and a small tea-spoonful of ground ginger. Grate off i
the yellow rind of the lemons, and mix it with the sugar and j
ginger; then add their juice. Put the tomatoes into a pre- j
serving kettle, and mash them with the back of a wooden
ladle. Then mix in the sugar, &c., stirring the whole very
hard. Set the kettle over a moderate fire, and boil it vt'fv
slowlv for three hours, till it is a smooth niass_>]rffi, m - m <r it 1
* ,/■*• ’ © |
well; and stirring it to the bottom jtfler.aaWi skimming.
This is an exeelh^-stPeeToneat; and as the lemon must !
on no omitted, it should be made when lemons are j
The best time is the month of August, as lemons
Fro then to be had in abundance, and the tomatoes arc less
watery tlian in the autumn months. For children, it is made
with brown sugar, and witfr less lemon and more ginger.—
Like all preparations of tomato it is very wholesome.
Yankee Apple-Podding. —Butter the bottom and inside
of a deep tin-pan. Pare, core, and quarter six or eight large,
fine, juicy apples; and strew among them a heaped half-pint
or more of broken sugar. Dissolve a tea-spoonful either of j
soda, saleraius, or penrlash, in a pint of sour milk. The soda
will take off entirely the acid of the milk, and render the
whole very light. Stir the milk, and pour it among the ap- ;
pies. Have ready a good pic-crust, roll out thick. Lay it
over the top of the pan of apples, Ar.; trim the edge nicely,
and notch it neatly. Put the pudding into a hot oven, and |
bake it brown. It will require at least an hour, or more, ac
cording to its depth. Eat it warm.
This is a good plain family pudding. A similar one may
he made of peaches; pared, stoned, and quartered.— Miss
Leslie's Receipt Booh.
Pumplihi Pies.
By a Yankee Girl.— Select a fine-grained, marrow
squash, cut it up and boil in as little water as possible.— j
When it is perfectly cooked strain oft’ al! the watery part, then
pass the squash through a sieve or colander. Add to one ‘
pint of the squash one quart of new milk, four well-beaten ,
eggs, and sugar, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, and salt to suit ‘
the taste.
The paste is made of lard, butter, cold water and flour,,
well mixed. As we never weigh nor measure the ingre- ;
dients, it is difficult to state the exact proportions, but with
a little Yankee guessing to assist, l think the pies come out j
about right.
AH wc can say to the above receipt of our fair correspond- j
. ent is, that wc have often had a taste of her pies, and found
them the most delicious and luscious of the whole pumpkin
j family of Yankeedom.
To Cure the Scratches in Horses.— Wash the affec
ted parts thoroughly with warm soap suds; rub them se
verely with a cob ; and then apply beef brine. One appli
cation will usually effect a cure. If you will rub the parts
that are usually affected, every day, with a cob, you will
seldom need- do anything more. A Farmer.
„ ■ — L _,-
Poetic. —One of the b’hovs indites the following to his
lady love :
“And when the reverend sire shall say,
“My son take thou this daughter ?”
I’d answer him in fearless tone,
“I shan't do nothin’ shorter !”
“Willyou, my son, support and nourish
This flower I give to thee ?”
I'd give my white kid glove a flourish,
And answer, “Yes, Hir-ree !”
A Good Boy.— “ Tom, where have you been?” “No
where.” “Whereis nowhere?” “Up on the common.”
“Who went with you?” “Nobody.” “Who is nobody?”
“Bill Doakcs.” “What have you been doing?’ 1 “Nothing.”
j “What is nothing?” “Playing marbles.” “What have
| you done with the money I gave you ?” “Lost it.” “How
i did you lose it ?” “Bill Doakes won it.”
A Loving Dialogue.— “Wife, 1 am going to leave you.
The doctor tells tne that I can live but a few hours at the ino: t!
I shall soon be in Heaven I’’
“What! you soon be in Heaven?—You? You'll never
be any nearer heaven than you are now ! you old brute !”
“Dolpheus!” hoarsely growled the old man—“Dolplieus,
bring me my cane, and let me larrup the old trollop once more
j before I die !”
I t$ © till f* ISS2 $H .
Improvement. —“ Great age,’’ this we live in. People don't
laugh now-a-days—they indulge in merriment. They don’t ■
walk they promenade. They never eat their food—they
masticate it. Nobody has a tooth pulled—it is extracted.—
No one has his feelings hurt—they are lacerated. 5 ottng
men do not go courting the girls—they pay the young ladies
attentions. It is vulgar to visit any one—you must only make
a call. Os course, you would not think of going to bed—you
would retire to rest. Nor would you build a house —you
would erect it.
Traveling w ith a “Sulkey.”—Smithers says lie always
travels with a “sulkey”—that is, he always goes with his wile,
who contrives to be obstinate and out of humor troni the time
they leave home till they get where they are going to. The
only time she ever smiled, he says, was when he broke his
ankle.
What a Story !— A child has been born in St. Timothy,
Canada, with nothing human about it but the head and arms,
the rest being a tortoise with a hard shell, and amphibious
feet, moving out and in. The parents wished to kill the mon
ster, but the priest forbade them, and baptised it, audit is like
ly to live.
A great many people like an “independent press, ’ which
always chimes in exactly with their oicn opinions ; but a truly
honest press must differ from somebody.
Sidney Smith said there were three things which every
man fancied he could do—farm a small property, drive a gig,
and write an article.
A friend of the Syracuse Star says: “lie’s head and ears
in love, or else he’s got the cholic—lie can’t tell which, as he s j
not certain which lie tasted last, kisses or watermeWhs.”
If wisdom's way you wisely seek,
Five things observe with care:
Os whom you speak, to whom you speak—
And how—and when—and where.
A Receipt.—The following ‘cure for the gout is taken
from an old work:
‘lst. The patient must pick a handkerchief from the pocket
of a maid of fifty years, who never had a wish to change her
condition.
2d. lie must wash it in an honest miller s pond.
3d. He must dry it on a parson’s hedge who was never
covetous.
4th. lie must send it to a doctor's shop who never killed a
patient.
sth. He must mark it with a lawyers ink, who never
cheated a client.
6th. Apply it to the part affected and a cure will speedily
follow.’
A rich man that employs his wealth in doing good, takes ;
the best and surest course to settle his estate upon his poster- *
ity for many generations.
Xenophon tells us of an Egyptian who,being sent by his
wife to purchase perfumes, brought her a jar of freshwater.
In the natural history <f insects, the grub turns into abut- j
terfly; but it often occurs in the natural history of man, that j
the butterfly turns into a grub.
It is merit and not title, which give importance. It is use- .
fulness, and not grandeur, which makes the world happy. j
As gold which lie cannot spend will make no man rich, so ,
knowledge which he cannot apply will make no man wise.
Men of genius arc often dull and inert in society; as the >
blazing meteor, when it descends to earth is only a stone.
Teach self-denial, and make its practice pleasurable, and you
create for the world a destiny more sublime than ever issued !
from the brain of the wildest dreamer.
“Genius will work its way through,” as the poet remarked
when he saw a hole in the elbow of his coat.
A clear conscience is the best law, and medicine the best i
physic.
A wife win i loses her patience, must not expect to retain*
her husband's heart.
Perfumed pocket almanacs are now carried by the Parisian (
ladies.
Crosses are ladders that lea l up to Heaven.
Moderation is the silken string running through ‘.he peafrlsj
chain of all virtues. U
the spanker.
Is the jay more precious than the lark, because his feathers
are more beautiful ? Or is the adder better than the eel, be- i
cause his painted skin contents the eye?
Rousseau says : “The empire of woman is an empire of
softness, of address, of complacency. 1 lor commands are ca- i
resses, her menaces are tears.”
A drunken man is like a drowned man, a 6><>l, and a mad- i
man; one draft above heat, makes him a fool; the second :
maddens him; and a third drowns him.
Old Cotton Mather, addressing the aged people of his flock. |
told them, “You have given your Hour to the devil, and now .
you bring your brail to the Lord.’’
Wlio was it that once said, “let women carry the whip,
and you'll ride safely to heaven, hut give them the reins, and j
they'll drive to the devil. ”
The superior man is he who devolopes in harmonious pro- ;
portions, his moral, intellectual and physical nature. ’lbis j
should be the end at which men of all classes should aim, and
it is this only which constitutes real greatness.
“Many things happen between the cup and the lip.” Ibis
proverb arose from the fate of Antinous, one of Penelope s j
suitors, who was shot by an arrow from the bow of l lyssus as
he was going to drink.
When does a man degrade himself to the position of a bad j
chimney ? When he smokes.
An Indian, dressed out in his finery, thinks he is some : but
we have seen an Indian summer.
You cannot always avoid the bite of a mad dog, hut you 1
can easily keep clear of a bight of a rope.
Why <1 id the French depose Louis l’hilippe ? Because his
offence was rank.
Why is the hangman’s trade like a vegetable ? Because it
is the art o’ choke.
Why is a heavy blow like a hatter's material ? Because it's
felt.
| Why is food to a hungry man like half-past ten o'clock o
i a Sunday morning ? Because its meal-in-time.
“Why is an infant like a diamond ? Because it is a “ dear
little thing.’' 1
A wag on hearing a chimney sweep had given up business,
expressed his astonishment, for he thought the business soot
ed him completely.
What is the difference between a pickpocket and a pocket
picked ? None at all, they are both relieved.
Every body condemns scandal, yet nothing circulates more
readily—even gold itself is less current.
Falsehoods, like distorted reflections from an uneven mirror,
| suffer death by contact with each other.
Speak of yourself as seldom as may he. If you praise i
yourself it is arrogance; if you dispraise it is folly.
Little minds triumph over the errors of men of genius, as
the owl rejoices at the eclipse of the sun.
If men would but follow the advice which they gratuitously J
j bestow upon others, what a reformation would be effected in j
the world.
Duty has pleasures without satiety.
He that pryeth into every cloud may be stricken with a j
thunderbolt.
Out of a hundred persons who pass you on their way to the !
city, you may be sure that ninety are going in search of mo- j
ney, and that eighty of them will not get a farthing.
Remember, of all things living, thou art alone made capable
of blushing. Consider, the world shall read thy shame upon
thy face; therefore, do nothing shameful.
Excessive fear opens the door to desperation.
M e should act well by our friends when present, and speak
well of them when absent.
He who wonders, is ignorant in the same proportion.
There are some mortals whose bodies are but as the orna
mented sepulchre of their dead hearts.
When men speak ill of thee, live so as nobody will believe
them.
Every man should strive to be a creator rather than an in
heritor —to give rather than receive—to forge his own wea
pons rather than rely on the rusty sword of his forefathers.
Wise sayings often fall to the ground, but a kind word is
I never thrown away.
■iflji’ Itfnnrorist.
Let dimpled mirth his temples twine,
With tendrils of the laughing vine.”
Front the New Orleans Delta,
Parson Kossin and (he Hornet’s Nest.
Friend Delta: —I lmve concluded this morning
i to till uj* a sort of hiatus in my professional life, by
! redeeming a promise I made to you some time ago
1 —that of writing “an occasional article for the
| Delta.”
! To see myself in print, is the ultima Thule of my
! manhood’s ambition, as it was in mv boyhood’s,
j when I scratched the “1 >isinterment” for the now
! defunct Collegian. Oh ! halcyon moments of de
parted joys, how often 1 linger, with a delightful,
though melancholy satisfaction, over the tomb ot
thy now faded, buried fruition! Then no worldly
cares had broken the heart’s urn, and unsealed the
invisible but sacred fountains that slumber there.—
Then, the thousand streams of affection flowed out
in joyous and benignant floods, cooling and calming
the irritations of youth, and smoothing its asperities.
Tempera mutantur, et nos mutamur cum illis. Ah 1
indeed have times changed, and we have changed
with them. I no longer revisit with gladsome
heart, the theatre of my juvenile amusements; for
j there, they are all strangers. A few sacred objects,
, o’er which memory her silent vigils still Hold!
j hold! thou “mighty implement of little minds,”
hold! Excuse me, dear Delta, for this strange ex
ordium to my story, and attribute it rather to a cacoe
thes scrihendi which has seized upon my sluggish
pen. AN ell, now for the Parson.
Not a thousand miles from the renowned stream
of lloligee, in the county of Green, and State of Ala
bama, there once resided an eccentric preacher,
whom I shall call Kossin. For several years, how
ever, anterior to his death, he resided in the adja- i
cent county of Sumter.
Parson Kossin was universally regarded as the
breathing impersonation of unsophisticated goodness,
and the nonpareil of a rustic clergyman. Indeed,
lie was, emphatically, what might with very great
propriety, be called a good man; but he had, two
most unfortunate infirmities, viz: whiskey drinking
and laughing. The first, as a matter of couse, was
artificial, and was superinduced from his natural
bicaeious disposition. The other was evidently con
genital, for it appeared to have been in his nature.
The first of these infirmities caused him to fall from
his high estate, and very often to draggle the er
mine of heaven in the dirt and filth of an unhal
lowed doggery; whilst the other, upon more occa
sions than one, has brought him to the threshold of
the county’s public boarding-house. Upon this in
firmity hangs my story.
In order for you the better to understand and ap
preciate what 1 am about to relate, I will give an
instance or two of the peculiar influence this morbid
laughter exercised over mv hero. Some years
since, he was walking leisurely along the streets of
the city of Mobile, reading the signs on each side as j
he passed along, when he suddenly came upon a
tremendous boot, suspended in front of a boot and ;
shoe store. The sight was perfectly irresistible to •
his eachinatory optics, and down lie tumbled upon I
the side-walk in a paroxvsm of laughter. Having 1
remained in a sort of semi-stupid condition for some <
time, the authorities of the city were about sending
him to the hospital, when one of the Parson’s friends |
came up and explained to the mighty crowd of poo- i
pie who had, through curiosity, assembled around
the unfortunate man of God, the circumstance of his
infirmity, and remarked that he was certain some
thing had tickled, more than usual, the old man’s !
fancy, and had thrown him into this peculiar condi- j
tion. \\ hen the Parson returned to his conscious*
ness, and was asked what was the matter, he replied j
that he wanted to see the man that wore that bi(j ‘
boot just one tone.
A certain facetious voting lawyer of Gainesville, ■
Alabama, was the evil genius of my departed hero,
for he never saw him that he did not fall as if a
bullet had pierced his heart. I poll one occasion,
when he was deposing upon the stand, in a very j
important civil suit, lawver S. entered the court j
room, and placing the digital extremitv of his dexter .
maims upon the apex of his nasal protuberance, ;
gave it a few gyrations, when poor 1 toss in tumbled \
in the sawdust of the court-house floor, as if fifty ;
Leyden jars had been discharged into his body. —
Judge Cli n, who had long known the witness,
and his infirmity, awaited with patience his recove
ry, and ordered Harvey S. (who, by the by, was j
another evil genius of old It., and was sheriff at the j
time) to remove the cause of annoyance to the j
witness.
This much as to his infirmity; now for the Ilor-
net’s Nest.
When flu* writer of this was a boy, Kossin officia- j
ted in small country church, twice a month, as its !
pastor. Every once-in-a-while he would have a two
davs’ preaching. This church, rude as it was ex- |
ternally, had pealed forth, at each successive meet- j
ing, as sweet and mellow music as ever ushered from :
the portals of a gorgeous cathedral. It had but J
one door and one window—one out immediately j
opposite to the other. The rough pulpit was erect- j
cd in front of the window, and commanded a full
and perfect view of all that passed out of either the
door or window; for the latter was cut down to
within one log of the bottom, making it almost as j
large as the door. Upon a certain Saturday of one j
these two days’ preaching, some rude urchins, “with
out the fear of God before their eyes,” did, “felon-J
ously,. wilfully, and perhaps with malicious atore-j
thought,” to the great annoyance of the congrega-;
tion, torture an Opossum, which by some means j
they had entrapped. The Kev. Kossin, indignant at ;
this desecration of the puilieus of the house of God, |
reprimanded the boys severely for their conduct. ,
One of them, feeling a little chagrined at this pub- j
lie reprimand, for a little innocent amusement, took
the Opossum to the door and gave his tail a slight |
twitch, which made him put on one of his usual
dr (/-grins, l’oor Kossin, as it stricken down by a
thunderbolt, fell almost lifeless in the pulpit, so
soon as the animal elevated its upper lip. The au
dience sat perfecty silent and contented, (tor they
knew his infirmity,) until the old fellow gathered
himself up. After he had fairly recovered, he
opened his eloquent and stinging batteries upon - the
i youth, who would thus wilfully tamper with God
Almighty’s appointed. The young man incensed
and smarting under the pungent castigation, started
for home, with the avowed determination of ob- j
[ taining revenge before to-morrow’s sun should set.
En route, lie bethought of a large hornet’s nest,;
which lie knew swung in the apple orchard at home. |
| After night had closed in, he prepared him a cork, ;
and repaired forthwith to the pendant mansion of I
; the hornets, and corked up its door. Early next
morning—which was Sunday —he proceeded hor
nets under arm, to the rustic church, and awaited at
the window the coming of his reverend enemy.
The hour of service was, as is usual in the conn- ;
trv, at 11 o’clock. To this hour did the youth look i
an Tth most intense anxiety. Finally, the long looked j
for hour arrived; the little church was filled to
overflowing; our reverend hero rose in his usual
pompous and pseudo solemn manner, and after hav
ing adjusted his spectacles, gave out his hymn. The
hymn’ being sung, lie “bent the willing hinges of tho
knee that faith might follow praying.” Just as ho
had placed himself in a devotional attitude, the
j youth slipped the hornets’ nest under, without un
j corking it, beneath the skirts of the brass-buttoned
“long tail blue.” “Oh Father ofiheaven and earth,”
commenced Kossin, “your unworthy subject feels
like praying to thee this morning, for he feels glory
jn—( just here the youth pulls out the stopper of the
nest)— in his— [slap, slap) —glory in his— [slap,
slaj), with both hands very rapid] —glory in his
— [slap, slap, slap, slap, (dap ] —glory in his soul,
and H—ll and and nin the seat of his breeches!”
TUSON.
From the St, I-outa Reveille.
A “Sucker” in a Harm Hath.
Our trieiid Louis, of the “Italian Baths,’’ has
just about the nicest arrangement in the shape of a
! bath that an up river man can desire; but still he
liasnt after all, got the “latest touch” in the wav
ot his cocks and that we found out recently, at
the Bt. ( harks Hotel, New Orleans. We called
in to see our old acquaintance, the Irish lady, who
does the towels, <tc. and who, with more stretch to her
girdle resembles nothing fleshy in peticoats, ex
cept it be halstafl, disguised as the “fat woman of
Brentford, in the “Merry Wives."’ We were shown
into a bathing roong and there we discovered that
an entire new plan of “letting on” and “letting off”
the water, hail been introduced. AN e saw a shi
ning brass plate, with three polished handle, hav
ing a “crank turn,” and elegantly lettered beneath :
“Hot,” “Cold,” “Waste.”
“Dye understand the cocks?” said Mrs. McTow
el. “Oh, certainly,” said we for the credit of St.
Louis and the “Italian I laths.” The fat mistress of
the mysteries shut herself out. We went to work
very confidently at the handles, heard a desperate
guggling ay through polished gratings in the bot
tom ot the tub, prepared ourselves leisurely for the
luxury; and —but we have another storv to tell
about the matter, and as the other is the richer of i
the two, we shall only say, that between “hot” and
“cold,” we were never so cooked in our life. After a
desperate struggle, having managed to get a bath on
the “improved plan,” without exposing our ignor- !
ance, we left the place, and were met at the corner
by a rough but estimable friend from Illinois—one
who had made a fortune among the “diggings” anil
who can aftord to take a “splurge” every now and
i then : so he terms his occasional visits to the large
cities.
“Vou hain’t been takin’ a bath liev ye?”
“Oh, yes,” was the reply.
“In them there brass handled consarns?”
“\es,” said we; “a great improvement; obviates
the inconvenience of the noise and dash of the old
plan.”
A\ e hope that this public confession may prove
some atonement: but we certainly did talk to our
more ingenious friend unblushinglv. He roared
out laughingly, and gave us his own experience of
the matter.
“( ld Mrs. Cornfed, there,” said he, “asked me if I j
‘knew the cocks,’and I told her *ves,’ in course—
cause 1 and bathed a few, I reckon, though not with
them kind of fixins—and 1 takes and turns ’em all,
and there was a kind ot splutter below; but 1 1 *n I
was ready there w as’nt a mite of w ater in the blast
ed thing? It jest nat’rally run out as fast as it run
in, and then 1 know’d what ‘waste’ meant. NNVI!, I
just fussed with it, fust up then down, and then one j
side, and then t other, till 1 allowed I’d shut the
darned tiling tip, ’cause the tub begun to til!. Well,
it kept fillin’ and fillin’, till 1 recoiled it was about
right, and in I went, one leg. but—holy Egypt! out Ii
came again howling! The cussed, eternal cold one
had’nt worked, I s’pose, and l couldn’t a come out
wussfrom a seven biler explosion ! Old seven hun
dred weight knocked at the door : ‘l’erhaps you
dim t understand the cocks ?’ says she. ‘Cock thun
der !’ I sung out, but I didn’t w ant her in, to laugh
at me, and wasn’t exactly fit to be seen by a lady
either, it >lte was fat; so l said it was nothin’, and
tried again to get the hang of the consumed han
dles; but by this time the tab was quite full, and
bililt’ at that, and 1 kept turnin’ and wrigliu’, till 1
rather guess I must a started the cold one without
stoppin’ the hot; and as it was hrimmin before, i
just now nat rally oi’errun, and ywiiiiiis then* wasn’t
the darnd st rise, all over that carpet in two min
utes that you ever did sec. The cursed cocks I
would’nt stop; none on ’em,and I was hoppin’ about I
in the water, and l had to sing out for old fatly
anyhow? I’d rather a gin a farm, by tlmiid r; but
I .siuitr out, ami half ojn iioil the* il.ior ’tom 1 reeul
lftftoil aliout my cosh torn ! l'aek wont old fritfa-
Lfainst tlio contro-tahli'ami broke a j*iteln-r. ami i
hopped on a chair ami into mv pants and then I;
broke tor one ot the opposite bat hint; rotnns, and
lockcil myself in, ami told the old woman I'd £rjn
her ten dollars if she’d uwah n]>. hand me mv shirt,
and say nothin’ alumt it! I don't know whether
she has or not, but l almost die a larfin, sjiiteof mv
scalded leer, whenever I think of it !
‘I tell you what,’ added our sucker friend, “1
don’t mind havin’ a lats. but if you yo, to ] üblishin’
this in the Reecille , I’ll shoot vou bv
beg to assure our friend that we consider ourselves
shot.
r%. mmmm wmgmmm
A I>og Fight.—The following storv of a great
dogfight which came off once upon a time, is not
“slow;’ but it wants the ludicrous accompaniments
of Gossiu, the clown’s voice and gesticulation to I
give it its richest effect:—
“Oil, pa, I jist seed one of the worstest dogfights
as ever was seen or hearn tell on in the world.”
“NVell, Simon, my boy, how was ir ?”
“AVell, there was one great big black dog with
white ears, and a brass collar, and one little, black
green dog, w hat hadn’t no man w ith him and as ”
“Come, come, Simon, don’t talk so fast, you get
everything all mixed up; stop and take breath a
moment, and not blow so like a porpoise.”
“NVell, I want to tell you how one dog with the
white ears got on one side of the meeting-house, and
the other meeting-house, with the yaller dog ! no, no,
I mean one meeting-house with the yaller green
ears got on one side of the dog, and the other he—
no, no, the white dog with the yaller ears, he gin a
yelp at the other meeting-house, and the other, the
other dog, dog—O dad, I'm giv eout; there wasn't
no dog at all /”
Timing It. — A minister in the Highlands of Scot
land found one of his parishioners intoxicated.— ;
Next dav he called to reprove him for it.
“It is wrong to get drunk,” said the parson.
“I ken that,’’ said the guilty person, “but then I
dinna drink as moikle as you do.”
“Why, sir, how is that ? ”
“NYhv, gin it please ye, dinna ye ave take a ghiss
o’ whiskey and water after dinner? ’’
“Why, yes, Jemmy, sure I take a glass of whiskey
after dinner, merely to aid digestion!”
“And dinna ye take a glass o’ whiskey toddy eve
ry night when ye are gangin’ to bed ! ”
“Ves, to l>e sure, I just take a little toddy even
night to help me, sleep.”
“NVell,” continued the parishioner, “that’s just
fourteen glasses a week, and about sixty every month.
I only get paid once a month, and then if I’d take
sixty glasses, it wad make me dead drunk for a week.
Now ye see the only difference is that ye time it bet
ter than I do.”
A Troublesome Complaint. —Dr. Weiting, in
one of his lectures given lately, remarked there were
a great many persons who had not the slightest
knowledge of the human frame or the “ills that
ffesh is heir to,” while they were apparently pretty
well informed on most other subjects.
To prove his assertion, he said that lie once met
a lady possessed of great conversational powers, and
he was disposed to think her rather intelligent till
at the close of the colloquy between them one after
noon, she enquired,
“Doctor what subject do vou lecture upon to
night ! ”
“The circulation of the blood,” be replied.
“Ah, well, then, l shall certainly attend,” w as the
lady’s exclamation, “for I have been very much trou
bled with that complaint of late! ”
The Doctor was satisfied.
wssnrsitfl
MILITARY INSTITUTE.
Blue Licks , Ky.
BOARD oFviSITORS.
r I' , llt. AI'JUT ANT GENERAL, together with five fit persona, tab
j A annually appointed by the Executive, to attend examination* at
I least once a year, according to law.
F A CUtTYi
j Incorporated with all the powers, and right* eicicMl by tho Tms
j tres and Faeu/tp of any other College,
j COL T. F. JOHNSON. Ornrrul Superintendent.
•COL. E. \V. MORGAN, .hint Superintendent and Professor of fa.
gineering and of .Yatura/ Uistirrn.
•LIEUT. COL B. R. JOHNSON. Professor of .Vatural and F.iperr
mental Philoso/thp.
fMAJ. W. W. A. FORBES, Prot'esssor of Mathematics.
RICHARD X. NEWELL A. M. Professor of .Inc,cat and Modem
fsinguagcs.
J AMES G. BLANK, A. B. Adjunct Professor of languages.
1 REV. J. R. SWIFT. A. M. Professor of F.thirs and Ueltes Let tree ‘
JAMES 11. DAVIESS. Esq. Professor of ]aiv.
| REV. H. V. D. NHVIVS, A. M. Principal of the Academy;
j CART. C. K. M< ITT, Teacher in the .feademu.
| CAFT. W. A\ . GAUNT. Adjutant of the Institute.
j *EiHeated at West Point.
♦Educated at the Virginia Military Institute.
Two hundred and thirty Cadets, from fifteen different States, hard
j entered this Institution since it was organized, in 1817, If is efttirty
; Ijr free from the control or domination of any sect of party, fciihir pnf
j litical or religious. Economy in dress, by the adoption of a cheap”
: Uniform, for Winter and Summer, is rigidly enforced. Every student
; is required to select a College guardian, with whoa all funds brought
I or received must be deposited, and no debt must be contracted without
i the consent of such guardian.
An institution combihing the science of the West Point Academy
and of Polytechnic Institutes, with the classical literature of our bast’
j Colleges, adding the modern languages, and superadding practical
schools of Law and Engineering, nearly realizes the long-felt dender-’
at ion of a university abie to meet the wants of Western progress a
university w here all may select a course of steady to suit their time/
j means ond professional destination.
j Mr. Daviess, the Professor of Law, is known is the variant
j Courts as a practitioner of great ability, varied learning, long eipcrU
j once and exalted character. His eminent qualifications, the wboMP
some exercise and discipline of the Institute, aud the convenient ob
servation of the forms of judicial proceeding, offer unusual inducts
incuts to those who are earnest to achieve distinction as sound lawyers
CIVIL ENGINEERING
Will be thorough:* and practical!* taught in the Western Military In
stitute—the Professor. Col. Moru an. being one of the n t skillful aud
experienced Engineers in the I nited States. All the instruments cou
nect.-d with that department, have been procured at considerable cost,
and are of the best quality.
The Superintendent takes the liberty of stating that he is now ofler
eds7j per month, fta* competant assistant Engineers. One of his foi
mer pupils receives at this time ® 2,5 011 per annum, ns principal En
gineer of a Railroad now under construction in Kentucky whilst
others of the same class arc receiving in different parts of the United
.states. *-.00(1. *]..',00, or * 1 .‘.'00 a year as Assistant Engineer*,
The time is rapidly approaching when there will be a great demand
for such as have been prepared for that vocation, at the Western Mil
itary Institute. Nothing is hazarded in saying that they wiU readily
■ command 81. .>OO or .$1,500 per annum. Every man ol uUervnuou
must see that the gigantic enterprises a I ready propost-d, wiU give birth
to hundreds of others, tributary to th. m. The rapid advancement of
onr w hole country, and the eagerness of our pc-0,,W. for explorine ti e
hidden resources of the new rotates and the newly acquired territory,
w ill give ample see)** for apes to coj iit ., to the skill and enterprise of
the Erigirwvr. tic Geologist, the Mineralogist, the Surveyor and the
Architect. Voung men who luive an opt.tudr for the Mathematiiwl
and Physical sciences w ill have a w i,’e t>ld opened p, them for enga
ging in an honorable, a healthful ami a lucrative por-uit, for which
they may be thoroughly apd practically tpialila-d. in a short time, ami
at small cxjteiise, al the Western Military institute.
TISUMS.
lfi the Academy - 9.10 00 |>er atiniiu,
111 ll;c IV,liege . . . -11 l III) -
F'-r Music aud use of Arms and Accoutrements II fill - •
For Fuel* - - - . 00 ■
I!’ ‘ARDING can 1-e had in private families, at from two to two and
a halt dollars a week. When in Barracks, it is designed to furnish
Commons at „ uniform rite. Eludents from a distance will be require
*-d to board at the Institute, and hare no communication with tha
town, exrep: as allowed by w ritten permits.
e £/ The next session w ill Commence <m the first of September, and
continue ten months.
f March gut. mm, ,_, f
THE GEORGIA MARBLE
Manufacturing Company.
interest ofll. Roberts iu the above c-'tn;<auy le.s pantsi iut*
A G"’ bands of J dm G. Raukm and the company nf Simoi.B, Hwt.
lick & Vaughn into flic hands of Win. Ilurli'k—wh-> lias associated
buns. 11 V. itli \tkinson Rank nol flic Clrttrgin M'rh'e .V :nufacturiog
Cos. Th*"’ husirn ss will hereafter he carried on h\ Atkinson, Ihmkia
Ilurlick. All debts due the concern and liabilities against the sums
since th'* first of June will be settled by them.
We are prepared to and * an exti pMvc business : onr nitrile is sirsP
ent—and w< ar.- determined to offer w ork at prices w Inch will kesp
Northern nurM. fjs.in the stale. Exruuine our marble and pn.**.
r work is all done at the mills. Address.
ATKL'WN. RANKIN k IIUHI.It K.
Haniageville, llierokee fV,. fleo.
AC o N
Candy Manufactory.
Siilincriher still rnntinues to nnitufictiw CANDY ofrrry
variety, next <i<mr below |{ >*- Jc < o'-, on Cotton Avenue. llv
---i tie reaped my tiieilitic* and obtained .'lAlifioiml Tool*. 1 am now j.rrpxr
eJto put up toord. r. CANOiES, of any variety, and warranted equal
to any manufactured in tlie sSotnh. I al*o manufacturer *U|**rtor ar
ticle of Liiiii and ot tier SYRUPS, O ‘RDIAI.S. PRESERVE*!, Xe.
All my artielo* are well pue.le and. delivered at any point iu tin- C.tj
and warranted to give sutistaction.
H. C. FREEMAN. A f *nt,
March. *2l, lS.'.rt. j—ts
lllii
Tllli nmlersiened have just eotupk*tiil ilu ir SPLESDIR
NEW ST.N.IJLE <n tin* corner of Mulberry and Third
Streets, nearly opposite the Moyd I louse, where they kerp on
hand safe ani well bkoke horses and every variety of
; Conveyance for the aeeomuioilatioH of their friends and the
pnblic.
Single Horses anil Drovers will be attended to with the ut
most care and on accominodatinfj terms. As the Proprietor*
, have hnt ONK STAID. Ivjiihl can therefore give their per
sonal attention to tlie.r business, they feel eoutident of being
able to give universal satisCietion. lhrd of Horso 75
j cents per day. T. M. MASOX,
March 21,15.70. WILLIAM DLBBIK.
| COT TO S GIW 0,
k v l WM &M,
HAVE now in successful oisration one of the most extensive
and complete Manufactories of UOTTuN GINS in the Boutk.a*-
I The materials usi*d are of the best qimlit v. The machinery is all new
I and constructed on the most approved plans for tbe manufacture t*f
I Cotton Gins.
The, machinists and workmen employed in the establishment are
: skillful and exjierienced in the business; and they have made such,
i improvements in tlx* mechanism and construction of the Gins that
j they feel certain, in every case, to furnish a Gin which will perform,
; admirably well, and give the purchaser entire satisfaction.
23?” ORDERS can be sent to E. T. Taylor & Cos. by mail, or eon-,
! tracts made with their Agents who are travelling through the country.
I GINS will be sent to any part of the country, and in all case* war-,
i ranted to fierform well.
Persons addressing the Proprietor* by mail, w ill direct their letter*
to Columbus, Ga..
| A sample of Cotton, just as it came front one of theirgins, manufac
tured for a planter of Muscogee connty. can he seen at the office of tha
| -Georgia Citizen,” Macon, to which the attention of Cotton Broker*.
’ and Planters is invited. N. Ousley & Son are agents iji the earn*
place, for the sale of these superior Machines.
Columbus, March 21st, 1850. I—l y
j _ WASHHiGTON HALL
i STABLES.
NEW ARRANGEMENTS.
.CV_ A.C. MOREHOUSE having purchased the interest of Thru*,
-siiA. Brown, in the above establishment, the business wUI
j hereafter le carried on under the firm of
MOREHOUSE & HARRIS,
who xvill be happy to serve their triends and customers on the fhorteeS
notice and in a satisfactory manner.
A CARD.
rpiiE undersigned having sold his interest in the Washington Hall
1 Stablest'l Mr. A. C. Morehouse, would solicit for the new Cca
-1 c ,. rn a continuance of tl;c patronage so liberally bestowed on R*old
tirm of Brown it Harris. THOS. A. BROWN,
j April 4, IM* 2 ~~ tf
NEW OMNIBUS.
i A T ASON At DIBBIAW OMNIBUS will call for Pas-
A 1 singers in any part of ths city, on notification being given at tha
Fl'’'d House or at their Stable,
April 11,1 b jP.