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Developing street smarts
Helping your child become
“smart” so he/she is safer on the
streets and in the neighborhood
is of more concern to parents
than ever before. Preparing chil*
dren for emergency situations,
particularly those involving
potential abuse or abduction, is
of primary importance today,
regardless of where you live.
Parents want to support their
children’s independence, but at
the same time assure their safe
ty. They want children to
become aware of potential prob
lems, but don’t want to scare
them.
Here are some ways to help
kids become street smart - keep
these goals in mind.
Assess your own situation.
Would you describe your child
as being fairly mature and
responsible? Does he or she
notice his or her surroundings,
or seem to have his or head in
the clouds? Do you think your
immediate neighborhood is a
safe place to walk alone? Are
there kids of about the same age
around? Do you know some of
your neighbors, storekeepers or
others in your vicinity?
Establish ground rules. Create
boundaries within which chil
dren can move safely on their
own. However, even it if extends
only to a 10-block area, an adult
must still give permission to go.
Boundaries should be set in
rural areas as well as in cities.
Depending on the destination,
a child should check in upon
arrival and come home at the
agreed upon time, unless he or
she calls. These are non-nego
tiable rules. If they are broken,
tell your child that you are
going to take away this privilege
till you feel he or she can earn
Tips from the extension office
Bird sanctuary
To attract bluebirds, put a nesting
box on a post at least 5 feet off the
ground close to a wooded area.
Make way
Remove old foliage from irises
and ornamental grasses to make
way for new spring growth.
Plant now
February is a good time to plant
balled-and-buriapped and bare-root
plants. That gives them time to get
established before spring. If estab
lished plants need moving to anoth
er place in the landscape, do that
now, too.
Feed bulbs
Fertilize spring-flowering bulbs
Do you have blood on your hands
Do you have a guilty con
science? Do you feel like
you’ve just killed your good
friend the grapevine because
you pruned it back and now it’s
just sitting there bleeding?
This flow of sap, or “bleed
ing”, does not harm the plant, so
don’t be alarmed. It is not
uncommon when pruning
grapes, especially when we have
a warm spell like we’re having
right now. Your vines will for
give you and probably thank
you by yielding great gobs of
grapes. After all, if done prop
erly, pruning your grapevines is
an invigorating process not a
death sentence.
I often drive down the road
and see these wonderful huge
muscadine vines growing in
people's yards. My mouth
waters when I think about
standing next to a vine and
munching those tangy sweet
fruits in late summer and into
fall. But I also want to screech
to a halt, jump out of the car
and start cutting on those over
grown beasts.
For optimal fruit production,
grapes require heavy pruning
each year. Without this they
will produce more tangled vines
and less fruit.' If left unattend
ed, sometimes they will bear
fruit only every other year.
Since muscadines require dif
ferent pruning techniques than
bunch grapes, we’ll limit this
discussion to muscadines.
Late January and through
is a fine lime to prune
r. Debbie
your trust again.
It’s okay to say NO if you
aren’t comfortable dropping
your 12- or 13-year old at a
mall, movie theater or video
arcade. Explain that it isn’t that
you don’t trust him or her, but
rather that you are concerned
about the crowds and the poten
tial for an unexpected situation
in any of these places. An adult
should go along even if there
are a few kids.
Role play with your child
potentially dangerous situations.
Pretend you’re a stranger in a
car asking for help, or a teenag
er inviting your child to play a
free game at an arcade. Then
reverse roles. Play the “what if’
game. Ask your child how
he/she would respond in differ
ent situations such as: “What if
you have a problem with your
bicycle and someone you do not
know offers to help?”
Talk to other parents. Be aware
that you are not in this alone.
The same conversations about
safety on the streets and on the
Internet are happening in every
household where there are
preteens. Talk, together and
compare notes on concerns such
as safety, going to parties and
other social issues.
If you have questions in the
area of Family and Consumer
Sciences, please call Monday
through Friday, 8 a.m. to 5 p.m.
at (770) 887-2418.
lightly with 10-10-10 (1 pound per
100 square feet) when the new
foliage is 3 to 4 inches high.
Bug buster
Any insects that overwinter as
adults are hurt by freezing weather.
Mild winters let these bugs go into
the growing season with high popu
lations.
Heat bills
You’ll save about 3 percent of your
heating costs for every degree you
lowa- your thermostat during winter.
One way to get those savings with
out sacrificing is to use newer, pro
grammable thermostats. They can
raise or lower the temperature auto
matically. So you can save energy
while keeping your home as com
fortable as you want it.
Sam SgL
Geer
your grapevines. Pruning can be
done any time during the dor
mant season, but in late winter
the vines are less likely to be
cold damaged.
Muscadines produce their
flower-bearing shoots from the
lower portion of the previous
season’s growth. So this lower
section is what you want to
remain when you prune. For
annual maintenance you should
take the branches that grew last
year and follow them back to
the first raised bump on the
stem. You are looking for that
collar that indicates where last
years growth began. Depending
on how much your vine grew it
could be six inches or six feet
down the branch.
When you find that collar,
come back towards the end
about 3 or 4 buds and cut every
thing off beyond that point. It is
unneeded growth that the vine
must support at the expense of
developing flowers and fruit.
The other situation is when
you’ve left your vines unpruned
for many years and now they
resemble your hair when you
wake up in the morning. Well in
this case they need a severe
haircut. A mere brushing just
won’t dj. You need to prune
Abby
By Abigail Van Buren
Universal Press Syndicate
DEAR ABBY: Eight years ago, I came out
of the closet. I had been married for 18 years
and had two children —a son, 15, and a
daughter, 17. At the time, I decided that for
40 years I had lived my life for everyone else,
and it was time to live my life for myself.
I have had a lover for seven years. We have
a loving and compassionate relationship. At
the time I “came out,” my family disowned
me, and we have not talked since. My son, on
the other hand, kept in touch. He and his
fiancee have visited my lover and me several
times, and we have enjoyed a good relation
ship over the years. During that time, my
lover and I have been very generous to my
son with birthday and Christmas gifts, and
even bought him a new car. When he and his
fiancee visited us on several occasions, we all
got along well. They met our gay friends and
socialized with us.
Last week, my son called to say they were
sending out wedding invitations. I am wel
come, but my lover is not. I explained to him
that we are just as much a couple as my
brother and his wife, or my sister and her
Horoscope
Aries - March 21/April 20
Several loved ones are being
secretive about a family matter.
Don’t get angry or push them to
tell you what’s going on. Try to
be patient. You’ll learn the facts
soon enough. The person whom
you’ve been seeing wants to
take a break. While this upsets
you, you know that it is the best
thing to do. Aquarius plays a
key role.
Taurus - April 21/May 21
Don’t be stubborn when it
comes to a business meeting
late in the week. Listen to what
others have to say. Some of
them make very valid points.
Try to work out a compromise.
A close friend is having roman
tic problems. Offer your advice,
because you’ve been in his or
her place in the past.
Gemini - May 22/June 21
A business associate reveals
his or her true feelings for you.
No matter how you feel, don’t
get involved with him or her. It
only will create problems at
work. A loved one asks for your
opinion about a family matter.
Be honest even if he or she
won’t want to hear what you
have to say.
Cancer - June 22/July 22
You have a falling out with
that special someone early in
the week, Cancer. While you
have every right to be angry and
upset, don’t make any drastic
decisions. The two of you can
work this out if you just listen
to each other. An acquaintance
them back to the original cane
running down the wire.
However, if you do this, you
won’t have any fruit this year.
I’ve done this to my vines, cut
ting them back so I have one
main cane running down my
fence/trellis in opposite direc
tions. I’ll be surprised if I have
any fruit this year. But the next
year should be great!
If you don’t want to go without
grapes this year, just prune one
side back to the original cane
and prune the other side back
like I described above. Then do
the same thing next year. This
way, you’ll at least have some
fruit this year.
If you’ve got several main
canes, you can take out 1 or 2
each year until you’ve com
pletely renovated the vine over
several years. Remember
though, you must always cut
back the previous years growth
to that second, third, or fourth
bud, or your vine will just keep
getting overgrown.
With proper care you grape
vines can remain healthy, attrac
tive, and productive year after
year, and I can stop driving by
your hourfe wanting to get out
and prune your vines. Instead,
I’ll stop by and eat the grapes in
the fall.
For more information on care
of your muscadines or bunch
grapes you can call (770) 887-
2418 or come by the Forsyth
County Extension Office at 101
E. Maple Street.
husband. He told me that he did not want his
friends to know he had a gay father, and
therefore, my lover would not be allowed to
attend.
I told him that if my lover could not attend,
then I would not attend. If he cannot accept
us openly, and if he’s ashamed of our rela
tionship, then I really do not want any further
contact with him.
We are very hurt. For the last eight years he
appeared to accept our relationship, especial
ly when it came to gifts and several free trips
for him and his fiancee to visit us.
Abby, am I wrong? I’ll be interested in your
comments.
SAD IN PALM SPRINGS
DEAR SAD: You are NOT wrong. Being
gay (or straight) is not a matter of choice.
People who do not know this belong in the
dark ages. I hate to see you break your last
remaining tie with your family, but I respect
your decision not to attend the wedding.
DEAR ABBY: I just moved to Los Angeles
two months ago, but my boyfriend of five
months will not be able to move from
asks to borrow money. Don’t do
it!
Leo - July 23/Aug. 23
Don’t let a compliment from a
co-worker go to your head. You
certainly deserve the praise, but
that doesn’t mean that you don’t
have to work hard anymore. You
must keep giving 100 percent. A
loved one has good news. Help
him or her to celebrate. Libra
plays an important role.
Virgo - Aug. 24/Sept. 22
Be honest when a good friend
asks for your opinion about his
or her new relationship. While
he or she might not want to hear
what you have to say, it still
needs to be said. You meet an
interesting person while running
errands. Make plans to see him
or her again. This could be the
one!
Libra - Sept. 23/Oct. 23
Don’t let a minor setback get
you down, Libra. You still can
reach your goal; you just have to
come un with another approach.
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FORSYTH COUNTY NEWS Wdn—day, February 3,1989
If you relax and clear your head,
you’ll think of the perfect plan.
A loved one is concerned about
you. Don’t ignore his or her
questions. Talk freely, and tell
him or her how you really are.
Scorpio - Oct. 24/Nov. 22
You have a lot to do this week,
Scorpio. Stay focused on the
tasks at hand, and don’t let oth
ers distract you. If you work
diligently, you can get every
thing done and have time to
enjoy yourself at the end of the
week. A friend of a friend asks a
favor of you. Do what you can.
Sagittarius- Nov. 23/Dec. 21
Don’t take your personal prob
lems to work with you. Your
superiors are expecting a lot
from you this week. Don’t dis
appoint them. A loved one lets
you in on a family secret. Keep
it to yourself. It’s not your place
to tell anyone. Leo plays an
important role on Thursday.
Capricorn - Dec. 22/Jan. 20
Stand your ground when it
Houston to California for another four years:
So far, we call every other night, sentfe
mails, and we plan to visit each other as often
as we can. Do you think it is possible torus
to maintain this long-distance relationship for
four years?
LOST IN LOVE IN LOS ANGELES
DEAR LOST IN LOVE: I’m doubtfulzS’s
easy to put your faith in the old qfreite,
“Absence makes the heart grow but
the reality is that when you find yourself
alone on a Saturday night or at a party, anoth
er expression will come to mind: “Oui-of
sight, out of mind.” '; -
CONFIDENTIAL TO “LOCKED UP IN
SAN DIEGO”: You must find the
perform another “brave” deed. Write a;shprt
note to the San Diego chief of police. Explain
that you have been Idtked in a house wifb.no
access to a telephone, by a husband who'has
raped and beaten you. Ask him to help you
get out. The police can help you locate a shel
ter for abused women. After that, regardless
of what your husband promises, stay away
and do not look back!
comes to a disagreement with an
acquaintance. You know that
you are right. Don’t back down
just to end the situation. Others
will support you. A close friend
wants to set you up on a Wind
date. Don’t do it. While he or
she means well, the date has too
much potential to be disastrous.
Aquarius - Jan. 21/Feb. 18
Don’t get in over your head
when trying to help a co-worker
this week, Aquarius. While you
want to assist this person, you
have a lot of your own work to
do. Don’t make yourself look
incompetent to make him or her
look good. That special some
one has a surprise for you.
Enjoy it!
Pisces - Feb. 19/March 20
When you see something that
you want this week, Pisces, go
after it. No one else is going to
help you get it, so take some
action. A loved one needs to talk
to you about a personal prob
lem. Listen to him or her, and
try to be supportive.
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