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Mother-in-law's disregard doesn't bode well for future
DEAR ABBY: I am upset about what my
mother-in-law did at my wedding
last Saturday. This is my second
marriage and my husband,
“Sherman’s,” first. Instead of elop
ing. we chose to have a wedding
with family, close friends and only
my children, who are 8 and 11. No
other children were invited.
We made arrangements at a
hotel to provide supervised activi
ties and snacks for the children.
One of my brothers refused to attend
because he was unwilling to leave his son
with someone he didn’t know. My other
brother went to great lengths to find a sitter
of his own choosing.
My mother-in-law informed us before
the wedding that she wanted to bring her
daughter’s 3- and 4-year-old children. We
clearly stated that no children other than pry
own were invited and offered to include her
grandchildren at the hotel with the other
children. She declined the offer and assured
us that the little ones would be taken care of
by a friend of their father’s.
Fifteen minutes before the ceremony,
those little ones were out of control, waving
plastic machine guns and running wild
through the church. I asked that they be
driven to the hotel immediately. They disap
peared, and I assumed that’s where they
went. When the ceremony began, they were
in the second row with Sherman’s parents.
During the 30-minute service, they sat on
various people’s laps, kicked the back of the
pew in front of them, shrieked, and loudly
asked questions about what was going on.
They turned an intimate, private affair into a
circus.
Now my two brothers and sisters-in-law
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Joyce Jillson
TODAY’S BIRTHDAY
(February 5). It’s an any
thing-can-happen type of year
for you, and the surprises start
this month. Where others don’t
dare go. you just say “yes” and
dive right in. The more you
see, the more you can open
your heart to accepting the
love that comes at you in
abundance. June and August
are especially fabulous, as are
the signs Sagittarius and Aries.
Your lucky numbers this year
are: 8,24, 1,55 and 19.
ARIES (March 21-April 19).
You're ready to take a risk
you have little to lose and your
happiness to gain. Don’t do
what you think you should do
instead of what you love. Let
nothing pull you off track from
what you are genuinely attract
ed to.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20).
Spontaneous decisions are
lucky. Abandon old projects
for something fresh. Your
career flourishes with the
influx of beginner’s luck.
Personal life is the focus
tonight. Stop catering to
friends who are low in appre
ciation.
FORSYTH COUNTY NEWS Thursday, February 5,2004 -
won’t speak to me because they think I
favored Sherman’s family over
Iljß Jliß
Jeanne Phillips
were upset, they should have brought their
children, too.
I am at my wit’s end. Sherman fully sup
ports me in this. I don’t want a fractured
relationship with Sherman’s mother, but I
have never had anyone disregard my wishes
with such effortless aplomb in my life. I no
longer want to visit her, spend holidays with
her or do anything with her at all. It bothers
me that she has set a precedent of what she
says, goes.
What can I reasonably do other than
pack up my family and move to another
state or country?
MAD AS A HORNET IN N.C.
DEAR MAD AS A HORNET: Tell your
siblings and their spouses in writing if
necessary that what your mother-in-law
did was against your expressed wishes.
Your mother-in-law was determined to
get her way regardless of whom it offended.
I don't blame you for wanting to distance
yourself. Under the circumstances, your
feelings are understandable. Unless you live
in a very small town, you don’t have to
move to another community to avoid your
husband’s mother. See her only when
absolutely necessary. That rude, self-cen
tered woman is nothing but trouble.
Under the stars f gaze
GEMINI (May 21-June 21).
You aim to hit the target dead
on, so even if you revel in the
journey, you are nonetheless
moving forward with alarm
ing speed. The arrival of a rel
ative or friend provides a
refreshing, new perspective
on life.
CANCER (June 22-July
22). Stressed? The stars
encourage you to find ways to
make things easier on your
self. You have the power to
change what you don't like,
and there is no excuse not to.
Those who start bold and new
get plenty of support.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22).
Make a silent agreement to be
a willing student, and then,
relax, and let the world reveal
its lessons. Regarding career,
the right person for the job is
you. All you need is a chance.
Try and remember why you
ever left the situation.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22).
System and order will be
hard to maintain in this day
of revolution-like activity
unsettling for someone as
organized as you, but don’t
resist, as it’s a waste of ener
gy. Everyone has a bout of
bad behavior now and then.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23).
If you want to be a good
friend, be available to listen,
but don’t ask questions. If
you want to attract romance,
be mysteriously unavailable.
Continue personal artistic
endeavors, as they are impor
tant to progress in other
areas.
my own. Other guests with older
and better-behaved children are
also upset because I told them
only my children would be there.
I haven’t slept a full night
since because of this. Today
Sherman confronted his mother.
She said her grandchildren are
family, and she wasn’t about to
exclude them, and if my brothers
SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov.
21). It all depends on how
you want to be. You’ll
achieve subtle gains through
subtle moves outstanding
gains through remarkable
moves. The biggest thing
standing between you and a
fortune is a thought.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-
Dec. 21). Look around you to
see how your ambitions fit
into the big picture. Helping
someone powerful will in
turn have a strong effect on
advancing your own goals.
The relationship of money to
romance is a focus.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan.
19) Simple things like a walk
in the park are better than
anything that can be bought.
Educational and career possi
bilities are numerous and
quite confusing, too. Sort
through it all; you’ll make
something of the mess.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb.
18). Love is crazy. One look
can change everything. Take
a risk you would not have
taken yesterday. At work, you
could help someone save
face, which will be remem
bered. A struggle leads to
clarity about what you really
want.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March
20) Your special project may
be close to your heart, but
others have never even heard
of it. Use your public profde
to help get your message out.
Funding arrives just in time
for something you want to
do.
PAGE 3B