Newspaper Page Text
NI R R T
New year needs a
resolution to take
laws off the books
VINCE COYNER
Columnist
One of the great places
to observe the successes
of New Year’s resolutions
is at the gym. January
invariably sees the place
packed with new people
in their new workout
clothes trying to under
stand the sea of
machines. By March, the
scene is much different,
in that a majority of those
newbies have fallen off
their path to fitness while
those remaining have fig
ured out which machines
they like and what rou
tines keep them going.
The beauty of New
Year’s resolutions is that
whatever your hubris at
the end of the year — “I'm
going to lose 50 pounds
by summer” or “I’'m
going to read one book a
month” — you can
reconsider it with little
consequence and change
your behavior according
ly. In other words, New
Year’s resolutions can be
short-lived or enduring,
you get to decide which,
based on your goals,
objectives and willing
ness to do the work.
Unfortunately, such is
not the case for laws.
Unlike New Year’s reso
lutions, which will leave
you with little more than
a bruised ego if they
don’t work out, laws can
leave you with less
money and less freedom,
and you can’t just shrug
your shoulders if they
don’t work out.
Across America the
new year rings in its
annual christening of new
laws.
From California, where
students get to choose
which bathrooms they
want to use, 1o restric
tions on Rhode Island
employers asking appli
cants about a criminal
past. There are 40,000
new laws and regulations
that will be added to the
millions through which
Americans already have
to navigate.
And, unlike resolutions
that can wither in the
face of reality, laws rare
ly, if ever, are rescinded,
and once they are on the
books they can be used
as tools of intimidation
by government regulators
to pretty much do what
ever they want. And what
they want is control,
regardless of what it
costs you.
Take as an example a
recent interaction
between the FDA and a
company called
23AndMe. 23AndMe
marketed a $99 test
where customers would
send in a sample of their
DNA and the company
would send them a
detailed ancestry report
and personalized infor
mation on 248 genetic
traits and health condi
tions.
Basically, the company
would analyze your DNA
and give you a report of
what it says about your
health, at a genetic level.
Do with it what you like,
but that’s what the data
says. And that’s the prob
lem.
Apparently the FDA
doesn’t think you are
smart enough to make
informed decisions about
your own health. As
such, they have perverted
a 1938 law that gives
them the right to regulate
“medical devices” to
basically put the compa
ny out of business.
You’re not allowed to
find out about a predispo
sition for cancer or liver
disease because the FDA
worries that some people
might do the wrong thing
with their info. To protect
doctors from competi
tion, and to keep citizens
from becoming more
informed about their own
Old-time masters of
laughter are missing
JULIANNE BOLING
Columnist
Lately I have enjoyed
the advertising of past
television comedy shows.
The Dean Martin Roasts
and Carol Burnett Show
were favorites at a time
when life seemed easier.
Of course, I was younger
and the shows available
were appropriate for all
ages. Not so anymore.
When was the last time
you said, “I don’t
remember the last time I
laughed this hard”?
Perhaps, we are taking
everything too seriously,
or the situation in our
country is no longer
laughable. Perhaps the
latest government
shutdowns, unexpected
health care changes and
the unemployment
benefits disappearing
have eliminated reasons
for us to smile.
What I notice is a lack
of comedians that do not
have to use profanity and
sexual implications to get
a laugh. There are no
more like Red Skeleton,
Milton Berle, Carol
Bumett and Tim Conway
out there. Younger
comedians seem to
believe that vulgarity is
funny. These younger
stage performers use
sarcasm, insinuate
immorality or use just
plain stupidity to get
laughs.
It is for sure that my
generation has very little
on TV to capture our
attention. We are too old
to appreciate the reality
shows and the survivors
of insane adventures. If
you like real life crime
dramas there are plenty
of those shows. If you
like pawn shops, car
towing episodes or
housewives in different
locales, there are plenty
of those too.
Many years ago when
remote controls were the
latest gadgets, the man of
the house had control of
it. Now, women are
beginning to take charge
in many households and
they dictate how many
ballgames are seen on
any given weekend and
how many car shows take
up an evening’s viewing.
Control of the “clicker”
by women has not helped
since the cooking shows,
fashion experts, and the
shopping networks are
often their main focus.
bodies, the FDA has
decided to put the genie
of DNA testing back in
the bottle.
They can’t. If
23AndMe doesn’t move
to the Bahamas'and set
up shop, someone else
will. Regulation cannot
stop technology. Nor can
it guarantee fairness.
Numerous jurisdictions
are debating raising the
minimum wage in order
to provide “a living
wage” or “fairness” to
fast food and other ser
vice workers. Such regu
lations will of course fail
at both counts, not
because they can’t raise
the wage, but rather
because they will simply
drive employers to use
more technology in their
businesses.
Today, computers can
take your order while
robots can assemble
burgers and sandwiches.
Regulation can raise
wages, but it can’t bring
about “fairess” or the
government mandated
Nirvana that regulators
seem to endlessly pursue.
How much good does a
higher minimum wage do
if it reduces the number
of jobs?
At the end of the day,
the new year ringing in
40,000 new regulations
should not be a cause for
celebration. It should be
a clarion call for a
nationwide resolution to
stop looking to regulation
as the solution for every
problem and to go on a
national diet where
instead of pounds we
shed a majority of the
laws and regulations that
are already on the books.
It might not improve
our waistlines or cardio
performance, but it will
do wonders for individual
freedom and the prosper
ity of the nation.
Vince Coyner is a Forsyth
County resident and a reg
ular columnist. You may
e-mail him: vince@imper
fectamerica.com
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One big difference in the
use of the remote is that
women will consider
watching a good movie
full of car chases,
bombings and war, and
will sit through many
ballgames without
protesting. Men, however,
if they have control, will
still flip channels in case
something else looks
more interesting.
Now, back to the
laughing matter. William
Rotsler wrote: “A smile is
a silent laugh. A grinis a
smile to yourself that
shows. A chuckle is a
small laugh, sometimes
real, sometimes not. A
snicker is a wicked
chuckle. A snigger is a
dirty snicker. A chortle is
an old-time, small time
laugh. And a laugh ... a
laugh is happiness set to
music.”
Now that you
understand the meanings
of the various kinds of
laughter, you may be able
to further confess that
laughter is indeed the
best medicine. And if you
remember the above
comedians, you may
smile until it becomes a
laugh.
Cumming resident Julianne
Boling's column appears
each Sunday.
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