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iljbf |epnblitan.
Mr. and Mrs. Spoopendyke.
“Now, my dear,” said Mr. Spoopen
dyke, shuffling the cards and dividing
the checkers into two even piles; “sup
pose we play a little game of poker.
Do yon know how to play poker?”
“1 guess so,” replied Mrs. Spoopen
dyke, hitching up her chair and dusting
the top •. f the table with a towel.
“Now how many cards do you want?’
“Let me think,” ftutteredMrs. Spoo
pendyke. “Let’s see. I believe I’ll
take ten.”
“Better take a gross!” snorted Mr.
Spoopendyke, eyeing her wrathfttlly.
“Perhaps you’d like half a barrel!
Don’t you know you can’t draw but
five? If you’ve got any bad cauls,
throw ’em away and I’ll give you more
for’em. If your cards are all good
you can stand pat. Do you want to
stand pal?”
“I guess so,” sighed Mrs. Spoopen
dyke, helplessly. “If I stand pat do I
play the eight or the queen?”
“You don’t play either,” replied Mr.
Spoopendyke, helping himself to five
cards and drawing a couple ot kings.
“Now, its my bet. I bet two; what
do you bet?”
“Then I bet two," answered Mrs.
Spoopendyke, biightening tip as she
began to see her way clear. “I bet a
queen and an eight,” and she laid them
down with confidence.
“That calls my hand,” said Mr.
Spoopendyke, gleefully, “only you
don’t bet your cards; you bet your
checkers. Put in two checkers aud
show your cards.”
Mrs. Spoopendyke shoved her check
ers into the middle of the table and
lei Ido vn three eights and a pair of
queens.
“Where’d you get ’em?” roared Mr.
Spoopendyke, recognizing his defeat.
“What’d ye want to keep talking
about the three of eights and the two
of queens? \Vhy r didn’t yon tell me
you had a full hand?”
“You gave ’em tome,” returned Mrs.
Spoopendyke, dolefully. “I only had
those five. What does it do?”
“It makes a jack pot!” growled Mr.
Spoopendyke, seeing a chance for him
self in his wife’s utter ignorance of the
game. “Now we’ve each got to put
in one checker, just be cause you play
ed in that way.”
“I am sorry, dear,” cooed Mrs. Spoo
pendyke, rather pleased with the idea
of getting out of the scrape at any ex
pense yet And,, I might have known
it would have made it a jack pop it I
had stopped to think!”
“When you stop to think, you only
want a stick of chewing-gum and a
rat-trap to be a female seminary! Do
you know what a jack pot is? Dot
some kind of a notion that it has three
lege and is used to cook mush in,
haven’t ye? Well, it isn’t to sit there
and gtin at, either! It takes a pair of
jacks, or something as good as them to
open it. Now take these cards and
tell nte whether you open it or not!”
Mrs. Spoopendyke examined her
cards critically.
“What have you got?” demanded
Mr. Spoopendyke.
His wife laid down four aces and a
jack.
Mr. Spoopendyke glanced at the
hand and then at his own cards. His
ace was only the joker, which he had
forgotten to remove from the pack.
“Which opens it?” inquired Mrs.
Spoopendyke, watching the gathering
storm with some trepidation.
“Notliingopensit!” yelled Mr. Spoo
pendyke, dashing his cards to the floor,
“With your way of playing it, it would
take a steam oyster knife to open it!
How’d ye think it was opened—with a
night key? (lot an idea that it had
hinges, haven’t ye, and opens widest
when it has nothing to say, like your
mouth?”
“Must 1 bet my last cent now?”
faltered Mrs. Spoopendyke, profoundly
impressed with the idea that the game
was still going on. “I’ve got four
dollars, but I want one for wiggin.
Shall I bet the other three?”
“Bet ’em!” howled Mr. Spoopendyke
who, like a great many men regarded
the idea of his wife beating him at
anything as something intolerably
blasphemous. “Why don’t ye bet?
Bring forth the speculative three dollars
and hazard it on the four triumphant
aces! Wah-h-h-h-!” and the conclu
sion of Mr. Spoopendyke’s speech flew
out of him too fast for perfect enuncia
tion.
“I don’t care,” murmured Mrs. Spoo
pendyke, as she wound the clock, and
stood scratching her nose with the key;
“he told me that four aces were as good
as the jack pot, and when I opened it,
he Baid I was wrong. Another time,
I’ll put them in my pocket and he can
play away at that jack pot until he’s
bald before I’ll help him get it open!”
And with this riotous determination,
Mrs. Spoopendyke crawled into bed
and dreamed that she had got caught
in a jack pot with a spring lock to it,
and couldn’t get out because she had
left the four aces in the pocket of her
new plum-colored silk. —TJvctkcs Mug
azine.
SUe Saw the Dust Fly.
Not long ago a bright little girl in
the Sunday school, who had reached
the bottom facts of the lesson—the cre
ation of man out of the dust of the
earth—came running home to her
mother over full of confidence in the
Scripture theory, and her _ own reflec
tive conclusions and exclaimed; “Oh,
mother, I know it is all true, what the
catechism said about Adam’s being
made out of the dust of the earth—l
know it is!” “Why?” “Because I
saw Aunt Emma whip Gracie, and I
saw the dust fly out of her. I know it
is so.” Little Gracie had been play
ing with the ashes.
Ayer’s Sarsaparilla is a highly con
centrated extract of Sarsaparilla and
other blood-purifying roots, combined
with lodide of Potassium and Iron.
Its control over scrofulous diseases is
nnequaled by any other medicine.
SCROFULA
and all scrofulous diseases, Sores, Erysipe*
las, Eczema, Blotches, King:worm, Tu
mors, Carbuncles, Boils, and Eruptions
of the Skin, are tlie direct result of an
impure state of the blood.
To cure these diseases the blood must he
purified, and restored to a healthy and na
tural condition. Ay Kit’s Sausai’A iu lla has
for over forty years hocn recognized by emi
nent medical authorities as the most pow
erful blood purifier in existence, it frees
the system from all foul humors, enriches
and strengthens the blood, removes all traces
of mercurial treatment* aud proves itself a
complete master of all scrofulous diseases.
A Keccnt Cure of Scrofulous Sores.
“Some months ago I was troubled with
scrofulous sores (ulcers) on my legs. The
limbs were badly swollen and inflamed, and
the sores discharged large quantities of
olfensive matter. Every remedy I tried
failed, until 1 used Ayer’s Sarsaparilla,
of which 1 have now taken throe bottles,
with the result that the sores are healed,
and my general health greatly improved.
7. feel very grateful for the good your
medicine has done me.
Yours respectfully, Mrs. Ann O’Brian.”
148 Sullivan St., New York, June 24,1882.
All persons interested are invited
to call on Mrs. O’Brian; also upon the
Rev. Z. P. Wilds of 78 East 54th Street,
New York City, who will take pleasure
li2*r of ’fviwtr to the wonderful efficacy of
Ayer’s rot only in the euro
or this lady, i>. . • -> and
many others within his ...
The well-known writer on the lioston Her at a,
B. W. Ball, of Rochester, N.U., writes, Juue
7, 1882:
•* Having suffered severely for some years
with Eczema, and having failed to llnd relief
from other remedies, I have made use, during
the past three months, of Avicr’s Sarsapa
rilla. which has effected a complete cure.
I consider it a magnificent remedy for all
blood diseases.”
Ayer’s Sarsaparilla
stimulates and regulates the action of the
digestive and assimilative organs, renews
and strengthens the vital forces, and speedily
cures Rheumatism, Neuralgia, Rheuma
tic Gout, Catarrh, General Debility, and
all diseases arising from an impoverished or
corrupted condition of the blood, and a weak
ened vitality.
It is incomparably the cheapest blood medi
cine, on account of its concentrated strength,
and great power over disease.
PREPARED BY
Dr. J.C. Ayer&Co., Lowell, Mass.
Sold by all Druggists; price §l, six bottles
for SO.
Mrs. 11. RAIS
Is now opening her stock of
Spring Millinery!
She will have on exhibition in a few days a
full line of
HATS, BONNETS
NECKWEAR,
HAIRGOODS
AND
jEWELnin
Those who wish to purchase MILLINERY
will do well to call and examine her goods,
as they have been selected with great care.
decStf
Miss KATE KING
Invites the attention of the Ladies to Iter
SELECT STOCK OF
Millinery and FancyQoods,
NOTIONS, Etc.
ALL OF THE LATEST STYLES,
Which site keeps on hand at all times,
and at the
LOWEST CASH PRICES!
NEW GOODS
ARRIVING DAILY.
FINE &SSIRTHINT IF ZEFIYI GiIDS.
tSTTIon’t fail to Call and Examine her
stock before purchasing elsewhere.
Miss Kate King,
PUBLIC SQUARE AMERICUS, GA.
aprl4-tf
Ngw Tailor Stoj,
AMERICUS, CA.
MThe undersigned lias
just opened on Jackson
street, next door to the
Telegraph OlHce, where
he is prepared to cut
GENTS’ CLOTHING
in a style that will equal
those mado in other
cities, either North ■or
—. South, from past experi
ence as a Cutter and practical Tailor, in
other cities, he can guarantee his work as
first-class. He has the
LATEST IIPOITS Of FASHIONS
for customers to select from, yet all gar
ments will he made to suit the taste of each
and every enstomer. Not having Goods or
Trimmings at present, they may he obtained
of the Americus merchants; but if the de
sired goods cannot he found here lie lias a
Full Line of Samples
from some of the best Piece-Goods Houses
In the North for customers to select from
and order at Wholesale rates. Particular
attention paid to Cutting, Making, Fitting,
Pressing, Cleaning and Repairing, at low
rates for cash.
Come and test the work of
W. T. MOORE.
feb!4tf
DR. ELDRIDGE’S DRUG AND PRESCRIPTION STORE DR. ELDRIDGE’S DRUG AND PRESCRIPTION STORE
Dr. E. J. Eldridge's
DRUG
AND j
5
t
t
rescription Store.)
/
t
c
<
!
I
i
DeORSAY *
*
I
1
COLOGNE !j
I
I
l
1
A Delightful and Lasting
Perfume.
Lubins’ and Other Popu
ular Perfumes.
HAIR BRUSHES,
COMBS,
Toilet Powder,
SOAPS, ETC.
-ALL OF THE-
Popular Patent and
Family
MEDICINES.
PHYSICIANS PRESCRIP
TIONS A SPECIALTY.
Dr. E. J. Eldridge’s
DRUG
AND —
Prescription Store.
A DOMESTIC SCENE
BETWEEN
Mr. and Mrs. John Smith.
Mrs. Smith —Now, John Smith, what on earth ! Didn’t I tell you to go to
JOHN R. SHAW’S and get these goods, and here you have gone some
where else and spent OUR hard-earned dollars, and haven’t got much more than
half their value. Why didn’t you do as I told you ?
Smith —Why—er—why—my dear, you see I thought he had his store torn
up so, that lie was paying no attention to getting in new goods, and
Mrs. S.—John Smith, you know that is not so, for I know I told you
yesterday that I had seen Mrs. Jones, who had been to John R. Shaw’s and got
EVERYTHING she wanted, and she told me his store was overflowing
with NEW Goods of the latest designs, aud you kn6w as well as I do, that a
man of Shaw’s business capacity and push, would ho found in the lead ol “the
Procession,” with the best and prettiest styles in everything. You know also
that I told you he had turned his attention exclusively to DRY GOODS
(Fancy and Staple), NOTIONS, CLOTHING, BOOTS,
SHOES, HATS, CAPS, UMBRELLAS, PARASOLS, and
all articles kept in a first-class Dry Goods Store, and if you had
gone there you could have got just what I sent you for, and at much less than
what you have paid for these things you have brought home. No, lam well
aware liow it all happened. You let some slick-tongue chap get hold of you
and pour about a pint of “ Corn Juice," down that old dry throat of yours, and
then you were ready to believe anything he said. I reckon he made you believe
this stuff here to be “all wool and a yard wide,” when its only seven-eighths, and
half cotton at that, and no style about it.
Smith —Well, my dear, don’t be so hard on me this time. I acknowledge
the Corn, and I promise you that I will not go counter to your advice again, for
I am now convinced that I have missed some good bargains by not listening
to you.
Mrs. S.—Now, you begin to talk sense, and I wish you had heeded my
words when you started out to buy—but I won’t scold you any more. Only
now he sure you listen to the old woman next time, for I tell you she has made
some of the best trades at John R. Shaw’s she ever made in her life.
[Smith retires, fully convinced that HIS Mrs. Smith is a woman of decided
energy and superior judgment .J
PR FJ.PTRTnQE’S DRUG AND PRESCRIPTION STORE DR. ELDRIDGE’S DRUG AND PRESCRIPTION STORE.
Ami now, kind friends, we trust you will follow the good advice given by
Mrs. Smith to her better half, and call and be convinced that we can give you
BETTER BARGAINS
than you can obtain elsewhere.
COME ONE, COME ALL,
THE OLD, THE YOUNG, THE SHORT, THE TALL,
THE RICH, THE POOR, WE PLEASE THEM ALL;
LET NOT THESE WORDS UNHEEDED FALL,
BUT HEED “THE WRITING ON THE WALL”;
COUNTLESS BARGAINS AWAIT YOUR CALL,
AT- *
JOHN R. SHAW'S,
Forsyth Street , • imericus , Ga,,
“AND DON’T YOU FORGET IT.”
JAMES FRICEER, , a. FRICKE
Danville, Va. Amebicus, Ga.
Jas. Flicker &Bro.’s
-=JEWELRYi^-
AND
MUSICAL INSTRUMENT HOUSE!
Under Barlow House, Americus, Ga.
New Firm, New Goods, Low Prices!
Buying in suclt large quantities to supply this and the Danville store we now net
quantity discounts that we did not heretofore, and are thereby enabled to e’ive our ens.
tamers lower prices than ever. Our stock of 8 us
WATCHES, CHAINS, NECKLACES, LOCKETS, BRACELETS
RINGS, SETS, LACE PINS, EAR RINGS,
GOLD AND SILVER THIMBLES, SOLID SILVERWARE
KNIVES, FORKS, SPOONS, CASTORS, BUTTER DISHES
PICKLE STANDS, SYRUP CUPS, SPOON HOLDERS
BAKING DISHES, CAKE BASKETS, WATER SETs’
WAITERS, GOBLETS, CUPS, FLOWER STANDS ’
CARD RECEIVERS, ETC., ETC.,
was never more complete than at the present time. We also have on hand a large lot of
Clocks of all KirL<a.s !!
which we will sell cheaper titan ever and guarantee each one to give entire satisfaction
SEWING MACHINES.
WE KEEP THE
HAIIS, WILLIAMS MR, WHEELER i WILSON, NEW HOI,
OTHERS, constantly on hand, and have Just reduced the price FIVE
DOLLARS on each style. Just think of it, a bran new Wheeler & Wilson, No. 8. with
two drawers and drop leaf, with attachments complete, for TWENTY'-EIGHT DOL
totS'a”SS!k?™£k!""" y ” I “ t - N ' eal “' >■•
SPECTACLES.
We always keep in large quantities, and have Instruments to test your eyes, and can fit
you up with just what you need. Prices from Fifty-Gents to 'Twelve Dollars per pair.
MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS.
This Department is filled with
PIANOS, ORGANS, ORGUINETTES, ACCORDEONS,
HARMONICAS, VIOLINS, GUITARS, BANJOS,
TAMBOURINES, and everything else in the Musical Instrument
line down to a Jews Harp.
In this line, as in all others, we cannot he undersold, as we buy in large quantities
direct from manufacturers. Our terms for selling Pianos and Organs on time are more
liberal than any other house we know of. To convince yourselves, get prices and terms
from any one else and then call and compare with ours. Remember, when youbuv from
us you don’t have to pay freight extra; the price of Instrument covers that; also includes
(stool and Book. Wo guarantee every Instrument sold. Should anything get wrong vou
do not have to write North and wait ten days for an answer, or ship your Instrument a
thousand miles to have it repaired, and he deprived of the use of it for six or eight weeks
hut simply report the trouble to us. Be sure and examine our stock, and get our prices'
before you purchase.
WORK DEPARTMENT.
We wilt, as Heretofore, turn out nothing but first-class work. Mr. C A FRICKER
gives his personal attention to this Department. ALL WORK WARRANTED Prices
reasonable. We solicit your patronage, and will endeavor by fair dealing to merit thesame
JAMES FKICKER & BROTHER,
O?. S. GKREIEIISnE,
CARRIAGE
Thankful for the patronage
heretofore extended to him,
would inform the public that he
is fully prepared to do all work
in his line,in the best manner, and
at prices as low as the lowest.
Bring me your old Buggies, Wagons, &c., aud
I will surprise you at the price they can he put
in order for. All work Ido is fully warranted,
and I won’t go hack on anybody.
Gome and see and be convinced. Shops Cot
ton Avenue, opposite Prince Bros.* Stables.
T. S. GRFJENE.
Americus. Ga.. Mav 19. 1883.
MEAT MARKET
AND
Provision Store
W. H. & T. M. COBB
Having purchased from HARE & COBB,
the Meat Market and Provision Store, on
COTTON AVENUE,
Keep on hand the VERY BEST CUTS of
BEEF, PORK, KID
AND SAUSAGE,
AND ALSO A FULL LINE OF
GREEN GROCERIES
Provisions, Etc.,
embracing all kinds of Vegetables and
Fruits in their season, Canned Goods, etc. !
It is their aim to keep a first-class establish-1
ment, and give their customers good goods
at the lowest prices. ,
Highest price paid for CATTLE, HOGS,
and all kinds of COUNTRY PRODUCE.
Amekiccs, Ga., Dec. 16,1882. tf
WnHMBMB9KKZnT!r.~ T7avk you seen it? If
TIMES.!
Box 8283, Blon, M#s. >
DOG ORDINANCE.
Section 1. Beit ordained by the Mayor
and Gity Council of Americus, and it is
hereby ordained by the authority of the
same that from and after the sixteenth day
of June, 1883, it shall be unlawful for any
owner of a dog to permit the same to run at
large, within the corporate limits of the city
of Americus, unless such dog shall be
securely and safely muzzled.
Section 2. Be it further ordained by the
authority aforesaid, that it shall be the duty
of the impounding officers of said city, to
impound and at the expiration of forty-eight
hours, kill all dogs running at large in vio
lation of the above and foregoing Section,
unless the owner of said dog so impounded
shall reclaim the same within the above
prescribed time by the payment of two dol
lars and fifty cents to the Marshal.
Section 3. Be it further ordained by the
authority aforesaid, that all ordinances in
conflict with or militating against the provi
sions of this ordinance, bo and the same are
hereby repealed. J. B. FELDER,
may3o-td Mayor.
For Sale.
I offer a splendid little 40-acre farm three
auarters a of mile northwest from Americus
a. There is on the place a six-room frame
dwelling, the rooms plastered aud very com
fortable; house almost new; all necessary
outbuildings on the place, and everything
in good order, including stable and carriage
house. The land lies well for cultivation,
and the soil with ordinary attention could
be made to produce profitably; excellent
water on the place. For price and terms,
apply to W. J. DIBBLE,
mar7-tf Real Estate Agent.