Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

WAIFS Alin WHIMS. A Lie ker-dealer—the schoolmaster, The sodn-drinker often thinks of foam. The promises of some men always re main shall owe. New way to “know all about thy self”—get a Presidential nomination. Isn’t it slightly paradoxical to call a man with full heard a bare-faced liar? Fly time—when you hear your father's cane thumping along the hall. Commissioner'Le Duo, in his crop re ports, never mentions the hops at the seaside. A western journal heads an article: ‘‘A Lunatic Escapes and Marries a Widow.” Escaped, eh? We should say he got caught. A Whitehall man has discovered a way of instantly tinning sweet milk into fresh butter. He feeds it to a goats, Patent applied for. A Wisconsin theorist says that hay will satisfy hunger. There may be some thing in this, for a couple of straws will frequent satisfy thirst. It is claimed by some medical men that smoking weakens the eyesight. Maybe it does, but just Bee how it strengthens the breath. . Boston has a publio vinegar inspector at a salary of SI,OOO per year. One would think ho would get awfully tired looking for his “mother.” A little girl in church, after the con tribute m plate had been passed, Com placently and audibly said, ‘‘ I paid for four, mamma, was that right?” Said Jones: “Smith won’t have so soft a thing as he had.” “I don’t know,” replied Robinson, “he’ll have a soft thing so long as he doesn’t lose his head.” Bridget—“And how shall I cut the poie, mum?” Lady of the house—“ Cut it into quarters.” Bridget—“And how many quarters wood I cut it into, mum? ” You may have notioed that the flies never bother a speaker, no matter how dull he is, but invariably attack the over worked sitter who is trying to get a lit tle sleep. They’re high-toned in Deadwood, and they wouldn’t go to see the Black Crook until it was advertised written by Shakes peare, and then they couldn’t keep peo ple away. “Ah heavens!” cries Nana, sentiment ally, to her visitor, “when one is adored by a magnificent captain like you, noth ing ever can make her love again—unless it is a major.” “My umbrella is getting decidedly shabby,” said a young man about town one evening last week. “I believe I will have to strike another prayer-meeting the first rainy night.” Occasionally you find a Detroit man who can stand having his whisky stolen and not complain; but when the flies pester them during a morning nap, they all swear.— Boston Post. Bullion is wealth in a crude form, and after it is coined and kept at interest a while, it becomes wealth in accrued form again. This language of ours is worse than the gem puzzle, a heap. Deuced queer how men differ about different things. When a man hooks a lot of fish he will brag of it for three days, and when he hooks a lot of apples he hasn’t a word to say about it. “Oh I thought this was a drawing room car!” apologetically observed a lady to a man in the door of the smoker as she discovered her mistake. “It is, mum,” he said, drawing on hisn with all his might. A poet asks: “When lam dead and lowly laid, * * * * And clods fall heavy from the spade, Who’ll think of me?” Don’t worry. Tailors and shoe makers have very retentive memories, and you’ll not be forgotten. A New Yoke man was challenged to fight a duel the other day, and being at liberty to choose his own weapons pro posed a trip to Boston on a Sound steamer. The challenger backed out. He said the idea that death must attend a duel was a relic of the dark ages. A visitor enters a French newspaper office and is greeted politely by the office boy—“lf monsieur comes to fight a duel he will have to be kind enough to call again; all our editors are already engaged for to-day.”— Paris Charivari. An Owego man, after a little experi ence, truthfully and indignantly asserts that no woman, however nervous, has a right to wake up her husband from a sound sleep to tell him on inquiring what’s the matter, “Nothing, only I wanted to know if you were awake. ” “Nasby” takes pride in the service of his father and grandfather, in one way or another. As for himself, he says: “My own military record is clear. In the late rebellion I served by substitute. I furnished three substitutes, all of whom to-day are in good health—in Canada.” A Freak of Nature. it is reported that out in Mason Valley a Piute squaw lately gave birth to a fe male papoose, which lias, instead of hands, two almost perfectly-shaped frogs joined to the wrists at their hack. The infant is able to move the legs and open the month of what takes the place of the right hand. The one fastened on the left wrist is not so complete, as the mouth will not open, but the legs move as freely as the other. It is supposed that the mother was frightened by a frog sometime pre viously. The Indians regard the infant as “ big medicine, ” and the squaw now occupies a high social position.— Logan County (Nev.) Times. Transplanting Wild Flowers. Every one who desires to remove from ilie woods and other wild localities the finest native flowers, should mark the spot where the roots may be found after the blooming season has ceased. This should be done while plants are made conspicuous with their blossoms. Early spring flowers have now passed, but many are coming out and more are to follow. Our ornamental gardens should not be made up exclusively of exotics; we have many American plants of surprising grace and beauty which, interspersed in the wilder portions of grounds, add greatly to their attractions. —A merican Cultivator Kelklsh people of the very amiable kind are the very worst sort of people to get along with. They conquer you with their smiles, and you are so greatly over whelmed by their gusli that you have not the grit to complain. They say that you are aw fully good, but they are never very good to you. They say that you are “a dear," and they take the pillow from under your head, still saying that to give it up you are “ a dear;” and you may keep on being “a dear” so long as they are amiable and 6elfish enough to let you do so. Mother (very sweetly) to her chil dren, who have just had a distribution of candy—“ What do children say when they get candy ?” Chorus— “ More 1" JV 0 William* * V * Hamilton Journal. LAMAR A DENNIS. Publishers. VOL. VIII.—NO. 38. suivsirr on the hills. BY ROBERT FRANKKNMTKIN DOTY. Lo: in the west the light Is being hid By intervening v-.oi, wul Nature old Huh hushed those busy daylight songs. Which wore but merry clanking* understood Ah coming from the haunt* of auu-llt hours! The red glare on our mundane sphere la aeen— The glowing minuet shines upon the hills, While earth la richly carpeted in gieen. And all the varied hues which Nature doea possess. On yonder’* hill we see the fiery gleam— The dying Htroken of Nature’* portraiture. Whereat all living things seem satisfied That sunset brings it darkness and ita rest— That sunaet’a deep philosophy is felt. As some great god propelling mother earth And bringing to us all a grand reviow Of all ita happenings and past events Ah! quietude is settling over earth. A dampening gloom in overspreading aL, While juilkuyddN cease the* r merry songs, And eriehafc chirrup in the tall, dank vri-ae. > * The lambs are looking at tho far-off hills, While brilliant sun-tints give a picture fair, But in the east the elonds o’erhang our earth. While from the South a gentle breeze is sent! We murmur not that night lu coming on To give us dreams and reveries of frieuds, For. as we see flie swallows hoiuew’ard fly, We know they, In their haven, dream as we, And so our hearts are gladdened at the thought That all creation is alive with love, As when the sunset on the hills about Gives fervor and sublimity to life 1 Oh! praise to all for beauteous sunset fair; On! praise to 10m who sends His goodness down To our great earth, and thinks of us when we Would wish to rest in quietude and peace— To dream and picture memories of all The fair, the rare that dwelleth round about! Ah, things which add a pleasure to our life, And make us thankful for our little all 1 The beauteous allegory of our life Portrays the picture of our gladdened hearts, A luring coast whereon we wander down r l3ie stream of life, across whose waters dee'* We see a sunrise on the other shore: 11 comes like butterflies of silvery light, And sinks again upon the distant hills— Ah. glorious sunset on the hills of God! THE RUNAWAYS’ REUNION. BY MBS. J. V. H. KOONB. CHAPTER I. “ Well, for my part, I am very sorry the old farm was sold, and the Ilustons have left us. They lived there many a year, and were hard-working, pious, quiet people, and it will be a long time before we shall have their like again for neighbors. ” “ I hope it will, father,” said 10-year old Ned, with a sigh of relief. “I hope the new-comers will not make me churn or carry a load of stove-wood every time I’m sent there in a hurry of an errand.” “ Chores are the making of boys, and they should always be ready to perform them,” answered the stern, mistaken parent. “ I think I have quite enough to do at home to make or break any boy, and, if I’m ever seqt to Mr. Maynard’s, I trust there’ll be no old Mrs. Maynard there to set me churning, or carrying crockery from the cellar, swill to the pigs, or wood from the shed, as old Mrs. Huston always did.” I “I think you will not be troubled in that way,” said meek-eyed Mary, a sweet-faced girl of 14, whose dread of endless drudgery fully equated that of ber little brother. “Mrs. Carroll told me yesterday that there were but three in family of the Maynards, aqd that Mrs. Maynard is an accomplished lady, keeps a housekeeper and a waiting-maid, and devotes all her time to the study of music and painting.” “Ha ! ha ! a fine specimen for a farm er's wife ! ” exclaimed Mr. Woodruff, with a glance at his daughter that made her shiver. “I cannot understand,” ventured Mary, “ why farmers’ wives and daugh ters, if they have any taste and talent for it, should -not study books, music, painting or anything else that tends to educate or elevate them. I have lately read that women all over the country are forming themselves into reading socie ties and art clubs, and are making rapid progress in whatever study they take up. ” “Nonsense! nonsense ! Lately read ! I like that sopnd! Where have you lately read such stuff?” demanded the infuriated father. “In a paper that Mrs. Maynard sent to Mrs. Carroll.” “I am sure I have always taken great pains to keep all kinds of story papers and books out of my house and out of my children’s sight, and now you, Mary, dare to tell me that you lately read— St. Paul, help me, or such non sense will be the death of me.” “ It was not a story paper, father, but a journal devoted to—” “Devoted to fiddlesticks! I’ll hear nothing more of it, and now I here for bid you to touch any more papers from Mrs” Carroll. I shall not allow her pro gressive ideas to creep into and poison your mind as they did your sister’s—re member, I say. I’ll have you read no more of them—it is time now that you and Ned were about your evening work.” triad of any escape from her father's pinching presence, poor Mary started for the cow pasture with Ned, while Mr Woodruff, to the annoyance of his tired wife, continued grumbling about the de generacy of the times and the growing idleness and forwardness of girls. In the rage of a moment he had mentioned his eldest daughter, and as a consequence his wife was in tears, Mary had darted away from him with a sorrowful face, and Ned took on a look of adamant, and somehow Iris self-trust was always shaken whenever he thought of her, and all his household seemed to slip from under his control if her name escaped his lips. The sight of Mr. and Mrs. Woodruff naturally suggested hawk and dove, yet there was much in common between them. His long and tiresome march in the straight and narrow way, his puny idea of woman’s sphere affected the life of his gifted, shrinking wife, as the ab sence of light and warmth affects a flower. He had admired all the beauty his prosaic eye could detect in her paint ings before they were married, but he was surprised and disappointed that she she should attempt or even desire to touch brush or pencil after they were married, for wife to him meant little more than servant of all work ; but he gave up at last that she should paint all the pictures she chose provided she taught their daughters nothing that would in any way interfere with their becoming first-class housekeepers and fit in every sense for hard-working farmer’s wives. Like Milton, he thought “one tongue enough for a woman,” and desired his daughters only to know how to read the F.Tigliah language, and to know only enough of arithmetic to keep their but ter and egg account exact. Qlad of the privilege of following the only line of light that stretched itself before her, she studied and worked, doing doublo duty, keeping in order her household and feeding tho spirit within her that never ceased its clamor for one more and high er tasto of the beautiful; her studio was her closet of prayer, her temple of wor ship, tho one sunny spot in tho lives of her children, the star that shone through all the darkness of their lives. Uncon sciously, its influence was wanning the hard soil that surrounded the inner and better life of Mr. Woodruff* The first that came to brighten their homo was little Helen, who in her baby hood possessed, a vest rnmigutsurplus energy that manifested itself in pranks of sauciness and self-will. Now, thought her father, was his opportunity. So he began to break her, not as he would a 2- year-old colt, by first coaxing it, but by abrupt and ill-timed commands to do, and not to do, whatever would thwart her girlish put ]jses, by surprising her in her moments of inspiration and burning her bits of verse or drawing, and sending her at once to some dull, dry task, to fit her, he would say, for womanhood’s stern duties. Galled in spirit, year after year, she endured such harsh and uncalled-for treatment. And only one sweet in a vast desert of bitterness bound her to her father; he had found tune to hear her Bible lessons, all that he permitted her to study; they had committed to memory, and could repeat together, a number of the psalms. And many a time Helen would wonder how one who could love and appreciate such beautiful songs could bo indifferent or dead to the bud ding, hopes and aspirations of girlhood. “ Pe'rheps his father taught him os he tries to teach me—and he was teachable; he says that I am ‘ perverse and obstin ate. ’ I think I am, from his standpoint, but he shall never subdue and crush me as my dear mother has been subdued and crushed. My gifts are God-given, and too sacred for even my father to trample upon, and I shall use them to the glory of the Great Giver; if not under the roof of home then away under the bending blue somewhere, I shall find a place that shall be to me a sanctum sanc torum.” And tho young girl looked de termined as a lioness as she uttered this declaration of independence. CHAPTER EL Dear Father and Mother : lam assistant teacher in the High School of this place : am en gaged for a year. A maiden sister of Mrs. Car roll, your old neighbor, is Principal. I am boarding with her. I have tne use of hor piano ; I take two lessons each week from a good music teacher, and find time each day to keep up my drawing. I crave your forgive ness. You will not forget my struggles to enter the life for which I felt myself born. I found nothing bnt disappointment, until in High*.,l made “ way for liberty," and you meat feel what the separation cost me, while yon are sorry for, and doubtless blame, your loving daughter, Helen. Thus read the letter that came to the half-erased Mrs. Woodruff in one month after their daughter was among the missing. “Driven from home,” the an guished mother would have said, had she not felt that she must comfort, not accuse, the sorrowing. Never before had she known the depth of her hus band’s love for his children. Baffled and broken as his spirit was now, time to his nature, he could not forgive ; and, for all his days of grief, his sleepless nights of Buttering, he still protested that his wayward child must be pun ished, and accordingly he wrote : Helen : You can justly claim nothing from the home you so foolishly deserted. If you re main away it must he in a silence that will not be broken by your Father. “ Cruel! cruel !” sobbed Helen, ns she read and 1 oad the words that seemed to freeze her heart and shut her out of the world. Her childhood had known nothing but the yellow leaf, but the sadness of autumn had not rendered her cold or misanthropic. The opening bud of love, watered bv the dew of faith, was trembling to blossom in her pure youug heart. She sought strength and consolation in prayer for the loved ones she had deserted. A sad, sweet picture she made as she sat in that capa cious old arm chair by the little parlor window, in the cozy home of the school mistress. She was simply and neatly clad in an evening dress of pink muslin, with a white bow of lace at her throat; one ring, a plain gold band, that encir cled the forefinger of her left hand, was all the jewelry she wore. It was a gift from her mother’s father, who prayed, as he placed it upon her finger, that if she inherited any of her mother’s talent she would also inherit, in an equal de gree, her father’s will power. Her glos hy brown curls were fastened carelessly back with a spray of white lilac. It was sunset, but the lingering beams of light that kissed her fair young face revealed the hitter tears slie could not keep back as she unfolded again and read aloud her father’s icy words. The wound was opened afresh, and in her agony she cried: “ Oh, my dear mother, why did you not say just one little word to me ? It would have been kind, and kept my heart from breaking. But, oh ! I know my father would not permit you, sweet, patient mother, dear little sister and brother, and with all your faults my dear, dear father, how can I live without yon ! What, oh what shall I do?” No audible answer came to the strick en young heart, but rest and love and home awaited her, for Mark Maynard had seen, heard and recognized his own, and had silently withdrawn from the room he had entered unseen, and said to himself as lie walked away : “Dear Helen, thou art the fresh, sweet spring in the desert of my lone life. I can scarcely believe in special providences, but surely God’s own hand has led her to the heart that has ever loved her, and when the wave of sorrow that is now’ sweeping over her goes by a lover shall claim his own.” Brief and to the point was the court ship that ended in the union of two con genial spirits, and Helen Wixslruff was duly installed mistress of the superin tendent’s home that the town people had named “Batchelor's Button,” lie cause of its round, smooth-ent appear ance. The modest little building lay in the center of an eight-acre lot just out of the corporation of the city ; it was surrounded by the choicest fruits and flowers. Four rooms had answered Mark Maynard’s purpose, a front and “ DUM SPIRO, SPERO." HAMILTON,GA-. SEPTEMBER Hi. 1880. back room above amt below, with bay window below and above 4km looked to the east, south and west. The south room below was largo, light and airy, and handsomely furnished, and answered the purpose of sitting-room and purler. The room above it was Mark’s study, filled with all that a student’s heart could desire ; back of this was his bed room, beneath which was kitchen, din ing-room, pantry and hall combined, furnished with overcoats, shoes, over shoes, hats and caps in the wildest pro fusion. But it was the first place that Murk hud ever found a leal home. His boyhood had been homeless in all save the name; he was left an or plum at the age et - years, and was adopted by hi- a. i. well-Ar*- do farmer, who had nv> nought than to bring Mark up a first-el ass farm hand- but tho fates had determined oth erwise. His uncle had allowed him three months a year in school, but Mark resolved to have more time for study than three months yearly afforded liim. Long and wearily he tried to get rainy days and odd times for liis own, but his Undo Huston was a model farmer, and there was always a hoe to scour, or some repairs to make that could bo done un der shelter, so the time went by till, one bright May morning, there was a vacant chair at tho Huston table. The family had not been awakened as usual by tho old boll that Mark had rung so early and so promptly for so many years, and long after the sun had peeped into his empty room did Mr. Iluston enter it in a rage, with a rebuke and a lecture on early rising be was swelling to deliver to tiie offending Mark. “ Why, Murk 1 Mark ! ” he began, but ended by taking from a bare table and reading the fol lowing explanatory note: Dkar Uncle : I cannot beg. I oan claim nothing that is mine till I am of age. Yon know the one desire of mv heart is an educa tion. To rid you of daily disappointment and vexation, and io keep my own life from starv ing, I leave vour home and care, confidently believing “ the Lord is mv shepherd, I shall not want.” That lie will bless you and yourH here and hereafter, is the prayer of Mark Maynard. CHAPTER 111. Poor Mr. Huston went hack to the broakfast table with a breaking heart, for he really loved all of the boy that his narrow life could understand. “I am afraid,” said he, “ that Mark is only anew edition of his father; and he frit tered all his time away and fretted him self into the grave over his hooks; and my poor dear sister seemed to think it was all right, too, for hor last words to mo were: ‘Do give my son a good education; ’ and by way of silencing an uneasy conscience continued, “I am sure there was noth ing in the way of the boy’s education had he remained here and trted todearn." Search after search was made for many and many a day all over the country, bit all in vain ; no clew could be gotten of the runaway. Buried in the desert of a great city, Mark Maynard entered the homo as errand boy of one of the best educators in the land, and eventually be came bis pupil. There he remained for six years, ut which time, through the in fluence of his teacher, ho was mode principal of the High School of L , For five years he labored there with all the zeal of an earnest teacher, and was then made superintendent, at which time Helen Woodruff glided quietly into the school and filled her place with becom ing dignity, and as quiotly in a short tiro } afterward was made the wife of him wh had been marked out by his friends for an old bachelor. The marriage created no little excite ment in the gossipy circles of the city, but a calm followed Mark’s innocent confession that Helen was his “firstand only love," which thread led to the un raveling of both their lives.. Busy-bod ies were satisfied when the heard that Mark Maynard, at the age 14, hail kissed Helen, a child of 8 years, his only play mate in his uncle’s neighltorhood, just the evening he ran away, that he hail not forgotten her, that he hail intended to go back and claim her, who, by a strange coincidence, iiad come to him. All the city bade them good-by regret fully, after two years of happy life spent in their midst. They sold “Bachelor’s Button,” and took their departure for the old Houston home, now all their own, and so near the one still dear to Helen in spite of all the bitter memories that clustered around it. wus a charity, a work of reformation that wus to begin at home. Tne Hustons had settled down to easy, quiet life in a neighboring village and whispered not the secret intrusted to their keeping, that the Maynards, who hail taken possession of their old place, were no others than the two run aways, Mark Huston, as he was called in his boyhood, and Helen Woodruff. From cellar to garret life ran through the old home ; large old rooms that hail been dark and dusty for years were filled with sunlight and fresh air and flowers ; happy birds sang in bright colored cages that hung from vine tangled windows; where all had been silence before, music gushed forth in sweet, entrancing tones. The Maynard place became the admiration, if not the envy, of the whole neighborhood. More than a year had gone by, and what of the new neighliors ? There had been enough gossip about them and their new way of country living, but nothing was positively known of them save that Mark Maynard had once been Mark Huston, that he hail run away from his uncle, educated himself, made money enough to buy his uncle’s interest in the farm, that he had married a lady, and was living in elegant style. None of the country people, except Mrs. Carroll, had ventured to call on the “high-fly ers,” as they had been termed by tfiose from whose inner lives the ideal had been crushed and <lriv*n out by the rude hand of the real. None, shall I say? Mary and Ned Woodruff, that very evening tliey had started so gloomy of soul after the cows, had wandered ori beyond the limits of their own meadow into an adjoining wood of the Maynard farm, wandered, talking busily of their trials, hopes and fears, when they came upon a vision that was light indeed to their weary young lives. There, on a large, mossy stone, sat sister Helen. Mary sprung toward her with a cry of joy ; Ned stopped suddenly, turned pale, and stood as motionless as a statue. Helen Maynard was not long in securing the entire confidence of her sister and brother, and they were ready to obey any command, or to act upon any sug gestion from her. She understood the part she mustpluy to accomplish her work, and struck the notes accordingly. Their father must not know anything of their designs until they were all executed ; and right well was their seorot kept. Ned was hired to saw wood once or twico a week at the Maynards’. Mary was em ployed at BO cents a week to toko charge of baby Maynard on washing and iron ing days. The ruse worked liko a charm, and Master Nod was furnished with the best l looks and liecamo quite an elocutionist. Mary learned the prin ciples of music, and, under thy kind and careful teaching of Helen, shefiould play several pieces in a very creditable man ner, was conversant with a few good hooks, and had acquired a little knowl edge of all kinds of reform literature. Many times in the dead still of night mother and daughter hail mot on the sly, working and praying together for the resurrection of the soul they both loved —the soul thut lay buried under the hard-beaten seal of custom. To bo brief, a year hod rolled by and everything was working together for good. Ned had committed and paraphrased several of the psalms, by which ho hod secured his father’s attention, if not his heart felt but unexpressed praise. Tho journey had boon made, the feaat was spread, tho victors wero waiting to be crowned. Nor had tliey long to wait; tho hour in its fullness was at hand, and never was a homo filled with truer, deeper joy than tho Maynard home, that beautiful day, when tho Hustons, Carrolls, Woodruffs, and a host of neigh bors and friends met to banquet and rejoice in the reunion and reconcilia tion of father and daughter, uncle and nephew. The seed has been sown broadcast, and year after year the golden harvest ripened Silent strugglo and suffering broke down the cold, hard crust from the life of Mr. Woodruff. Tho Bpirit of Christ’s tender words, “ Except ye be como as little children, ye shall not en ter tho kingdom of heaven,” fell for the first time into his heart liko a balm. A new life opened within him ; a now earth stretched itself before liim, and a now heaven bent abovo him. The wildornoss of the Woodruff place blossomed as a rose, and celebrated as artist, author and elocutionist became the names of Helen, Mary, and Ned Look lontf enough On any peasant’ll face hero, ooarne and lined. You’ll catch Antinoue nomewbere In that day. Then iieralat. And If your apprehension's competent You’ll liudaoiuo fairer angel at hln book Ah much exceed!ug him an he the boor. Muncie City, Ind. A Mustier Mashed. One of the many handsome young la dies residing in the aristocratic portion of the ancient suburb of Bellville packed up a small “grip-sack” one morning re cently, and departed for a visit with a friend at one of the many picturesque stations that abound on tlio Cincinnati, Hamilton anil Dayton railroad. Finding, upon her arrival at Cincinnati, that she bail several hours in which to make the train, and as she also wished to purchase several of “those things” so essential to the completion of a young lady’s ward robe, she concluded to nmko her pur chases and pass a portion of hor surplus time in walking to the depot. She made her purchases and was leisurely strolling along Fifth street, admiring the latest summer styles, when hor meditations were brought to an abrupt termination by a dapper, dandified little fellow, who was rigged up in one of the very latest style summer suits. His cranium was covered with a hat constructed upon the second-story jilan, a pair of eye-glasses straddled the bridge of his Roman nose, and a sweet, killing smile apropriatoly adorned bis countenance. Stepping up, lie politely lifted his hat and accosted her thus: “ Excuse-ah’-mo, Miss, may I-ah’m-liave the ali’-m-pleasure of carry ing vour portmanteau ?’ The young lady looked id him, hesitated a moment as if meditating whether it would bo safe to trust him, and with a “certainly, sir, certainly,” handl'd him the “grip-sack,” which the handsome Lothario took, at t lie same time tipping u wink to a couple of friends who were loafing on the comer. The couple started toward the depot, and as they meandered along the young man tried lo strike up a conversation with the young lady; but she evidently wasn’t Jii a very talkative mood, as she could not be induced to speak only in answer to direct quest, ms, and those she answered in monosyllables. Arrivingatthe depot, the young lady, to the consternation of the young masher and the amusement of his friends, wiio hod followed them just to watch developments, pulled out her pocket-book, and handing him a dime, said, in a voice loud enough for the by lamlers to hear: “ I’m reallysorry, but it’s all the change I have; I’m very much obliged to you for your kindness. I as sure yon it is appreciated, and should j ever meet you again 1 will give you fifteen cents as it is certainly worth a quarter.” —Cincinnati Paper. Memory. Memory is riot peculiar to intelligent people. On the contrary, the inferior race of mankind, such as negroes, the Chinese, etc., have more memory than those of a higher type of civilization. Primitive races, which were unacquainted with the art of writing, had a wonderful memory, and were for ages in the habit of handing down, from one generation to another, hyrnns as voluminous as the Bible. Prompters and professors of declamation, know that women have more memory than men. French women will learn a foreign language quicker than their husbamls. Youths have more memory than adults. It is well developed in children, attains its maximum atenit the fourteenth or fif teenth year, and then decreases. Feeble individuals of a lympliatio temperament have more memory than the strong. Students who obtain the prize for memo ry and recitation chiefly belong to the former class. Most people remember better in the morning, when the miuil is soothed by a night of rest, than in the evening. Many people who hunt for happiness. are continually finding fault. J. L. DENNIS, Editor. SI.OO a Year. Rata. Rats are a great pest in every city and town, and, indeed, everywhere in this country. It seems nearly impassible to get rid of them, and any method that promises to secure this most desirable end is worth trying. Somebody recom mends covering stones, rafters, and every part of a cellar with ordinary whitewash, made yellow with-copperas, putting copperas in every crevice or cranny where a rat may get, and scatter ing it, in the corners on the floor. Ho has tried it repeatedly, and the result has lieen a general retreat of both mioo and rats, not, one of which had at last accounts returned. It is said that a coat of this yellow wash, given each spring to a cellar, will net only banish those ver min, but will prevent I fever, dysentery, or typhoid fever. Everything eatable should lie carefully Beourod against, the ravages of rats, wliioli are so intelligent that they will soon abandon places where they can get next to nothing to eat. The rat wo are most troubled with is tho brown rat, much larger, stronger, floroer, and more ravenous than tho black rat, which has almost entirely disappeared, having been driven off or exterminated by tho more formidable species. The brown rat is frequently called the Nor way rat, from the erroneous impression that it came from Norway, which coun try it did not reach until it hud become abundant in Britain and America. 11 ap is aired first, at, Astrakhan, iu tho begin ning of tho eighteenth century, and gradually spread over Western Europe, whence we have derived it. It was once known ns the Hanoverian rat, because the British Jacobites were pleased to be lieve that it came in with the House of Hanover. Britilliuigli’s Advancement. The New York Times' London letter lms the following: “If the friends and foes of Mr. Brad laugh, the member for Northampton, had entered into an alliance to advance his personal interests and make him tho most famous or notorious of Great Britain, they could not have done more than they have done. They have played his game all the time. It is difficult to say who lias been his greatest friend Mr. Gladstone, the Primier, or Sir Stafford Northcote, the loader of her Majesty's opposition. “ Mr. Brudluugh is proprietor and ed itor of a newspaper called tho National jteformcr. ‘.We novor at any time pre viously to tho present excitement,’ ho said to a friend of mine, ‘sold more than twelve thousand copies a week, but our circulation lias now gone up to two hun dred thousand.’ This being tho case, Mr. Brudlaugh, from a position of com parative impeouniosity, rises to one of aflluonco, and a mere political outsider the other day, ho is now one of the fore tnost men m England. Determined to still further advance his cause, uae Hen ry Lewis Clarke has issued a writ against him for $2,500, the penalty proscribed by act of Parliament for sitting and voting in the House of Commons without hav ing subscribed to tho oath of allegiance, in accordance with tho 2(itli and 80th Victoria, chapter 10. Every time Brnd laitgh votes, Clarke says he will sue for the penalty.” Farming Under the Sea. The fact is not generally known that within three hours’ rido of Boston a large and profitable business lias been carried on since 1818 along the seashore, anil is nothing more or less than “farm ing under the noa.” Everywhere upon the coasts of eastern New England may be found, ten feet below the water mark, the lichen known as carrageen—the “Irish moss” of commerce. It may lie tom from the sunken rocks anywhere, anil yet the little seaport of ficituato is almost the only plane in the country whore it is' gathered and cured. This village is the groat center of the moss business in the country, and the entire Union draws its supplies from these beaches. Long rakes are used in tilling this marine farm, anil it does not take long to fill the many dories that await the lichen, torn from its salty, rock bed. The husbands and fathers gather the moss from the sea, and the wives and daughters prepare it for the market. Soak it in water, and it will melt away to a jelly. Boil it in milk, and a delicious white and creamy blancmange is the re sult. The annual product is from ton to fifteen thousand barrels, and it brings $50,000 ' into the town, which sum is shared by one hundred and fifty families. Its consumption in the manufacture of lager beer is very large, and the entire beer of the country draws its supplies from Soituato benches, as the importa tion from Ireland has almost ceased. It is not generally known that the moss, as an article of food, is called “ sea-moss farina. ” Apple Boueii.—According to a writer on horticultural and agricultural sub jects, when borers have once gained possession of a tree the only way to get rid of them is to bunt for them care fully with a knife or wire and destroy them. The eggM of the parent beetle are deposited during nights in June, and are placed in the bark of the tree at the surface of the ground, or whatevor may Burround the tree. The®© egga hatch m our latitude during (September, and it is soon after this that the young grubs may Ik? easily roniovwl without the ua© of anything morn than the point of a pen knife. A few minutes spent in this way about the Ist of October each fall will keep the tree free from this pest. — iScie/i --liflc American. To wash lawn or thin muslin : Boil two quarto of wheat brail ill six quarts or more of water half au hour. Strain through a coarse towel and mix in the water in which the muslin is to be washed. Use no soap, if you can help it, and no starch. Rinse lightly in fair water. This preparation both cleanses and stiffens the laws. If you can, con veniently, take out all the gathers. The skirt should always bo ripped from the waist. The whole number of men, from time to time, called into the national service during the war of the Rebellion was ‘2,(188,523. As many of those were mustered in twice, while hundreds of thousands deserted who were never under fire, it is probable that not more than 1,500,000 effectively participated in suppressing the Rebellion. THIS AND THAT. A good oonveytnoer is known by his deeds. Light travels at tho rate of 192,000 miles jmt second. Iron tiles are mode by hand while ths iron is soft, uud thou annealed. When a man draws an inference he should draw it mild. The mark of cane—Dust on the un ruly Schoolboy's jacket. It is believed that the word “ never" has been crippled for life. WiiAn a man's curiosity is piqued, he asks sharp questions. Many of tho now summer books in press will bo bound in muslin. An artist is not so strong as a horse, but ho can draw a larger object. Ought a woman to kiss a tobaoco oliower ? Yes, if she chows. Saratoga hotels will all charge a little more than they did last year. Hen a kino of reptiles, is “Landlord, Fill the Flowing Bowl” a treat ode ? A correspondent reminds us that “ ‘There is n medium in all things’— i 'spoolidly s]lirituol ism. ”. The piono first made its appearance as a musical instrument aliout the mid dle of the eighteenth century. Why have chickens no hereafter ? Because they have their necks twirled (next world) in this. Why iH it easy to enter ar. old man’s lintlitation ? Beoomse his (fait is brokisi and his locks are few. Having asked his girl for a kiss as a tonic, she replied that there was such a thing as being too tonic. “ You’re a man after my own heart,” us the blusliiug maiden confessed wheu her lover proposed marriage. The trouble with too many in this world is that they want reserved seats everywhere except in the family circle. Why is the strap of an omnibus like a man's conscience ? Because it is an in ward check on the outward man. " A KIKH," Mill ChrUw, “In * noun, we allow; But toll me, dear. In It proper or common 7” Lovely Mary bloahed deep, and exclaimed, “ Wby, I vow, I thtak that a kiaa ta both proper and oommon.” What’s the liest definition of a quill ? Something taken from the pinions of one goose to spread fhe ’pinions of an other. Why is the money you are in the habit of giving to tho poor liko a new ly-liorn babe? Because it’s precious little. Hymen is always represented os bear ing a torch. This symbolized the tortu ous ways of true love that never did run smooth. “Sim never told her love”—because tho young man, anticipating something of the kind, hasn’t called to see her since leap year opened. When a fond parent secs aboywjdk through a gateway, instead of climbing the fence, lie iH worried for fear the lad isn’t quite himself. Artkwuh Ward once began a lecture by saying : “ Ladies and gentlemen, I possess a gigantic intellect, Imt I haven’t it with me.” A lazy boy was complaining that his bod was too short, when his father stern ly replied. “ 'Flint is because you are al ways too long in it, sir.” The proprietor of a Louisville bone factory announces that persons leaving their bones with him can have them ground at abort, notice. NoTHriU* will please a girl so much as the information that a rival, who is try ing to rob her of hor best fellow, has got a pimple coming on her nose. A New Jersey colored man, whose wife hail left, said: “She would eome buck if I frowed ber some sugar, but I ain’t frowing no sugar, do you heah?” Ip an unemployed man can find noth ing else to do, lie ran always find a situ ation as head waiter by going into a crowded barber shop to get bis hair cut, A country editor being asked, “Do hogs pay ?” says a great many do not. They take the paper several years, and then have the Postmaster send it buck, “ Refused.” Don’t despise a woman because she can’t drive nails or hang pictures ; if you want to discover your own weak points, just carry a (5x4 mattress down a narrow, winding stairs. A strolling theatrical company was at tlie dinner-table A waiter ap proached one of the members, and saia : Houp?” “ No, sir,” replied the guest, “I am one of the musicians?” An unsuccessful vocalist went to the poor-house anil delighted the inmates with his singing. He said it was a nat ural thing for linn to do, ns he hail l>een singing to poor houses ever since he be gan his career. Fight Halves. A girl composed of eight halves is s mathematical anomaly, a scientific mon strosity, And yet we heard ono recent ly. within half an hour, declare she was Imlf dead with heat, had laughed herself half to 'leuth at somebody’s mishap or blunder, was half crazy to know some thing about something else, was half tinkled to death at some funny remark of an ape of a beau, was half mad at an escort’s presumption , and was half killed by a Imirpin scratching her neck, while all of h< ir—two halves more—was sti] alive, well, and absurd. Girls, drop all these hyperbolical norisensiealities that disfigure your daily walk and conversa tion, and he as sensible as you are pret ty and lovable. —l Mad wood Pioneer. A Hard Business. It is estimated that to properly care for the sewers of Paris it requires one man for each kilometre, but this average has not been maintained from motives of economy. Still, there are employed in this work 627 men, divided into little companies, which arc sent to various sec tions of the city, according to the needs of the sewer service. Almost all these men are natives of the Midi, and come from Gascogne. Theirsis ahardbusiness, and though some few egoutiers, as they are called, may liecome old, it is rarely the ease that one can safely do such work longer than fifteen years. They then become victims of the “plomb,” a word used to express “asphyxia.” The Oroe.er thinks that if the dairy interest continues to increase as it has been doing heretofore, in a few years hence no other country need make but ter and cheese, as this country will be able to supply the requirements of the world at a lower rate and of a better quality than they can make it them selves. “Mv sou,” said an illicit distiller* “ remember that it is the early bird that catches the worm.” “Perhaps so, father,” replied the slothful young man —“perhaps so, in some localities, but around here it strikes me that it is the early revenue officer who catches the worm. ”