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THE STANDARD AND EXPRESS.
A. 11ARS4H U,K 1 „
W. A. lURIKAf ALK,J Editor* and Proprietors.
'I V MVK -*I.Vo; I,
never upoke a word of love,
We never named its name,
Ah through the leafy wood, and down
The shadowed path we came;
And yet—and yet-I almost think,
Although I can’t tell why,
rtis love is mine, and mine is his ;
We’re oura—my Live and I,
h lF® let , me sit . and lire lit thought
Those blissful hours ttgain
At. and ere I heard In my heart
1 heir sap and Sweetness drain.
‘ 'AP'ItPt 8 J u’ lucr their fair young heads
, Bsneath t’ ae bluer sky,
'rte ta'ke a a t trivial, common things,
We ,alked— my Love and I.
And once—bow well I know the spot—
We stopped beside the brook.
And saw the gurgling waters, as
Their sunlit way they took.
My eyes met his. the soul of love
Tn that brief glance did lie,
My eyelids drooped—we watched the Btrearn
Fiow past- my Love and I.
A nd now, I’ve nothing more to say,
My heart won’t let me tell
The silent talk our spirits had
The charm that o’er ua fell *
I am not sure, but still i think
Although T can> tell why. ’
His love is min'-, and mine is his
We re ours -my Love and I.
THOMPSON’S DOR JERRY.
About one hundred m : les from Mo*
bile, on the banks of the Tombigbee
river, there lived an old planter named
Thompson. Mr. Thompson was a great
lover of horses and dogs, particularly
the latter, and his plantation was head
quarters for the lovers of the canine
race for miles around. Mr. Thompson
had a son named William ; we will call
him Bill, because everybody called him
by that name.
Bill was about fourteen years of age
when the war broke oat, and it inter
fered with bis father’s plans concerning
his education. However, the war
ended, and he was sent to finish his
studies at the University of Virginia.
Bill remained at the university for
about four years, and at the expiration
of that time returned to his home
The old gentleman was very proud of
Bill—indeed he had reason to be. He
bad grown to be a tall, elegantly formed
man, of graceful manners and genteel
appearance.
f in his joy at his son’s return, Mr.
Thompson had provided an elegant re
past, and the elite of society were in
vited to welcome Bill home. The
entertainment was numerously at
tended, and the occasion promised to
be the one of the season, for the old
gentleman and Bill were really great
favorites. The old mansion was
thronged with youth and beauty, and
to the merry music of the dance the
hours glided swiftly away.
Bill was congratulated over and over;
but tbe many congratulations he re
ceived occasioned tbe drinking of more
whisky than he could carry, and his
part of the reception was brought to a
close by bis getting helplessly drunk,
in which condition he was found by his
father, under one of the tables.
The old gentleman, however, smoth
ered his resentment, taking into con
sideration that this might have been an
accident, and that it would not again
occur; but his hope was destined soon
to be dispelled, for as other fetes fol
lowed at other places, it was found that
Bill was too fond of whisky and that he
regularly c.ime to grief at each enter
tainment.
Mr. Thompson was not a man to
very long tolerate such action on his 1
son’s part ; and one morning, after one
of Bill’s excesses, he spoke to him con
cerning the matter. ■* Bill could not
deny it, and there was a poor chance
for an apology. The old gentleman
became enraged at Bill’s silence, and
thus addresed him: “Bill, I have
raised you up as carefully as ever a
child was raised. You have disgraced
me and my name ; I had fondly hoped
you would be an honor to me and it.
I’ll have no more of this. You can re
main here if yon want to, and this may
be your home. You can have a horse
to ride and I will clothe you decently ;
but, he added with great emphasis,
“you shall not hereafter get drunk,
you shall either earn your money or
steal it.”
It. was in vain that Bill tried to apolo
gize. The old gentleman would take
no apology. The fiat had gone forth,
and however dry his throat might be,
Bill knew there would be no retrac
tion of his father’s words. So he
concluded to be a temperance man, but
as is usual in such eases, though “the
spirit was willing, the flesh was weak.”
Bill’s throat soon became very dry
and annoying, and at last he made up
his mind that he must calculate upon
some plan whereby he could get a drink
of whisky.
In some of his readings Bill remem
bered the fable of “The Wise Dogs,”
and determined to profit by it. Meet
ing liis father one evening, about a
month after he had received the pre
ceding lecture, he thus addressed him:
“ Father, do you know anything about
this colony of Yankees down here at
the mouth of the river ? ”
“ No, I don’t” was the reply, and a
gruff one too, for the old man didn’t
like the Yankees and didn’t care to
hear anything about them.
“ Well, father, they must be a queer
lot. They have got schools down
there.”
“Yes,” thundered his father, “schools
for niggers.”
“ Wei*, ” replied Bill, “lets give the
devil his due; they teach white children
too.” ’’
“ Ye3,” said the old man, “ they teach
lies—they teach them lies.”
“ Well, I suppose they do,” replied
Bill, “ but what I was going to speak
of is that they have got a school for
dogs ! ”
“ A school for what ? ”
“ A school for dogs! They teach dogs
to talk ”
“Come now, Bill, if you are fool
enough to believe such stuff, don’t try
to make as big a fool of me ! Teach
dogs to talk! They may teach them to
steal—l shouldn’t wonder if they did,
hut don’t tell me about this teaching
dogs to talk ! ”
“ Well, now, father, I respect every
word you say,” replied Bill, “but I am
bound as a gentleman to believe what
gentlemen say ; and I have heard sev
eaal. talking about it. Really. I know
nothing of the facts; but, as I said, I
heard several speaking about it, and I
believe it. I was down town the other
day and your dog Jerry was with me,
and a gentleman from Tennessee
noticed him as we were speaking of the
school. I asked him how long it would
take for a dog like Jerry to learn to
talk, and he said a dog as knowing as
Jerry would learn in two months.
Borne dogs will learn in three months,
and he said a good many never would
learn.”
Bill’s praises of Jerry did not go un
noticed. If there was any one thing
that the old gentleman fully believed,
it was that there was never another dog
that, knew as much as Jerry.
The conversation for this time ter
minated, but Bill somehow felt that his
father would mention the subject again,
and he was not mistaken.
A few days after the above dialogue
the old gentleman met Bill and thus
addressed him : “ Bill, do you really
believe that Jerry could learn to talk?”
“I certainly believe it.” Bill re
plied.
“Do you know how much they
charge down there ?”
“Well,” replied Bill, “I believe
they charge twenty-five dollars admis
sion, and then ten dollars a month for
board and tuition for whatever time it
takes.”
“ Bill, how much would it cost for
you to take Jerry down there and put
him to school and come back; make
up the figures, and if it ain’t too much,
I’ll have you go down and put hitn to
school.”
Bill figured up the amount and came
to the conclusion that about seventy
five dollars would defray the necessary
expenses, and so apprized his father.
“ Well now Bill, the Osage is coming
down the river this afternoon ; you get
ready and take Jerry down there, and
put him to school, if you find the
school all right; if not, you bring him
home. I wouldn’t sell him for a thou
sand dollars, and if any dog can learn
to talk, Jerry is the dog.”
The grass did not grow under Bill’s
feet in getting ready, and at five in the
afternoon he got on board the steamer
Osage, which was bound down the river
to Mobile.
Bill was not long ou board before he
had the whisky he so much longed for ;
and by 8 oVock in the evening he was
as drunk as a lord, and had already got
into a fight. Poor Jerry, seeing bis
master rather rouehly handled, took a
share in it, and bilingoneof the parties
engaged was quickly set upon and
knocked over the side of the boat, and
falling just in front of the paddle
wheel was struck by it, and instantly
k lied.
Bill did not discover the loss of the
dog until the steamer had arrived at
Mobile ; and it was to that place that
he had originally determined to go.
His astonishment and sorrow at the
loss of his father’s favorite dog were
very great, and it moreover necessitated
all the strategy Bill was possessed of to
bring his original plans to anything
like a successful ending,
He had originally intended to take
the dog with him to Mobile, and on
returning to his home to declare to his
father that he had been
that the school was a humbug and the
pretended teachers knaves; and he well
knew that so great, was his father’s dis
like for anything Yankee that he would
escape without any very severe cross
examination. The killing of the dog
had upset ail Bill’s reckoning, and he
was compelled to frame anew story,
which, as the sequel will show, he suc
cessfully did.
After remaining for about a week at
Mobile and having pretty nearlj' ex
hausted his cash in hand, * Bill started
for home. His father met him at the
landing and asked him many questions
concerning Jerry’s chances of learning
to talk. Bill declared that there was
no doubt of his ability to learn, that he
had seen many dogs not half as know
ing as Jerry who could talk quite well;
and the result was that the old gentle
man was much elated with the idea of
possessing such a wonderfal being as a
dog lhat could talk.
Before the end of the two months,
which Bill had declared would be suf
ficient to give Jerry a decent education,
Mr. Thompson had become quite im
patient to hear concerning Jerry’s pro
gress, and Bill had written several let
ters by his lather’s orders to ascertain
how the dog was along, but
strange as it seemed, no reply was re
ceived to aiy of them and at last Bill
was ordered to get ready and go down
and see about Jerry, and bring him
home, if only for a visit.
Bill again went down the river on the
same steamer by which he went on his
previous trip, and with very much the
same results so far as his own conduct
was concerned, until he returned home.
This time his father did not meet him
at the landing, to Bill’s great relief, but
soberly waited for him at the house.
The old gentleman’s disappointment
can better be imagined than described,
when Bill came into the house alone;
for he had not the slightest doubt that
his favorite dog, fully informed on sub
jects in general, would soon delight his
ears with a hearty “ good evanirig” in
place of his accustomed familiar bark.
“Bill,” said his father, “where’s
Jerry ?”
Bill made no reply.
“I say, Bill, where’s Jerry?
“ Jerrv’s dead, father.”
“Dead!”
“Yes, dead.”
“ How did he die?”
“ I killed him,” coolly replied Bill.
“You killed him! You killed
Jerry?”
“Yes, father, I killed him.”
“ Yon rascal ”
“Hear me, father,” interrupted Bill.
Let me tell my story, and then if you
think I did wrong you can abuse me
and do and say what you like. ”
“I went down to the school,” con
tinued Bill, “and I was there all
through the examination. Jerry could
talk as well as I can ! They sai'i he
was the smartest dog they ever saw!
We came down aboard tbe steamer, and
Jerry sat up in a chair, and as the
ladies whom he had seen before came
one by one into the cabin Jerry would
say ‘good morning, Mrs. Smith,' or
‘ good morning, Mrs. Jones,’ and he
looked as stately as a judge.
“ Well, father, at last we got started
away from the lauding. Perhaps we
had got a half mile away, and the ladies
were looking out of the windows, and
Jerry was still sitting in his chair, when
all of a sudden he turns round to me
and says : ‘Bill, how are yon, my boy?”
I says, ‘l’m all right.’
“ ‘ How’s the old man ?’ says he.
“ ‘ All right,’ I replied
“ ‘ How’s the old woman?’ says Jerry.
“ Now, father, I didn’t like to hear
him speak as he did about you, and
when he called yon the old man, I
couldn’t stand it very well, but when
he spoke that way about mother I
couldn’t bear it at all; still I didn’t
want any fuss, because you thought so
much of him, so I didn’t say anything
only to eay she was well.
“ Just then he looked around, aud
speaking right loud, says he: ‘Bill,
does the old man hng and kiss the cook
as mueh as he used to?' I didn’t reply,
and he kept on: ‘Bill,’says he. ‘l’ve
seen the old man kiss the cook, Louise,
I mean, more than fifty times, and I’ll
tell the old woman when I get home.
Won’t she give it to the old man!’
“ Father, I couldn’t stand it. It was
right before the ladies. I got up and I
took Jerry by tbe throa‘, and says I,
‘You lying dog, I’ll choke you to death.
This comes of your cursed Yankee edu
cation. I might have known thej’d
teach yon to slander your friends. 1
“ Well, father, the villian tried to
bite me. I had him by the throat and
—I don’t know what I was going to do
with him, I was so enraged, but I car
ried him out on the deck, when he tried
to bite me worse than ever. I went to
kick him, and somehow—l was too an
gry to recollect just how—he either
lumped overboard, or I threw him over
board, and the wheel struck him and
killed him.
“Now, father, I have done. If you
blame me I must bear it, but I really
was glad he was dead when I came to
myself, for I thought what trouble he
would make with his lies.”
The old gentleman was pale as a
ghost.
“Bill,” said be, “you did right. I
ought to have known that he’d lie if he
could talk. Bill, here’s a hundred dol
lars. Don’t go and get drunk on this
money now, but Bill, don’t you say any
thing about this you have "told. Jerry
was a mighty smart dog, but somehow,”
he added in an undertone, “ I always
had an idea that dog was watching me!”
— Metropolitan.
Mortality of Races.
The Deutsche Versicherungs-Zeitung
of New Orleans, contains the following
interesting notes on the mortality of
the two races there, taken from statis
tics of Dr. Cliille. The mortality of
the colored population has always been
decidedly in excess of that of the white
population, excepting during yellow
fever epidemics, this disease chiefly
affecting the whites. There is no
doubt that the great mortality existed
before the war in New Orleans and
other cities—certainly in Charleston,
Washington, Baltimore, and New York.
In comparing tbe five years of
freedom from 1860-70 with "the four
years of slavery from 1856-60 we find
the aggregate death-rate has remained
about the same. But when comparison
is drawn between the whites and blacks
in these periods it appears that the
mortality of t e blacks has greatly in
creased. Thus, during the four years
1856-60 (1858, a yellow fever year, be
ing excluded) the colored death-rate
was about 44 to the thousand, and the
white 39 per thousand; while in the
four years 1865-70 (excluding the yel
low fever, 1867) the colored death-rate
amounted to 43 and the white to only
33 per thousand. What are the causes
to which we shall ascribe this larger
mortality of the colored race? The
official sanitary records afford scarcely
any data bearing upon this point, and
therefore are of no assistance in de
termining the question. Some of these
causes doubtless lie in the greater ig
norance in determining the question.
Some of these causes doubtless lie in
the greater ignorance and improvidence
of this race, and in the fact that its
mortality from smali-pox, cholera,
consumption, still births, and diseases
of children is greater. The future of
this race will depend upon the degree
of its natural increase by propagation.
The only reports of the health board
which throw any light upon this matter
are those for the years 1872 and 1873,
since these alone give the number of
deaths among children under two years
of age with the two races separated.
Regarding the population in 1872-3 as
the same as that in 1870, find that
in the year 1872, in every thousand
children, 154 white chidren died under
two years of age to 298 colored, and in
the year 1873 181 white and 335 colored
per thousand died under that same age.
This proves conclusively that in New
Orleans the mortality among the col
ored children as compared with the
mortality of white children is enor
mous.
The Uses and Functions of the Leaf.
The office and utility of leaves are
becoming better understood by cultiva
tors than formerly ; yet we find a good
many still adhere to the old belief that
the sun’s rays shining directly on form
ing fruit are what perfect it, independ
ently of other influences. On this sub
ject theory and practice have been in
variably found in perfect accordance
with each other. The principles of
physiology teach us that the sap of a
tree, when it passes in at the roots, re
mains nearly unchanged in its upward
progress through stem and branches
until it reaches the leaves, where, being
spread out in those thin organs to light
and air, it undergoes a complete change
and thus becomes suited to the forma
tion of new wood and new fruit. Strip
a rapidly-growing tree of its leaves at
midsummer, and from that, moment the
supply of new wood ceases, and it will
grow no more till new leaves are formed;
aud if it has young fruit the
and maturity of the latter will cease in
the same way. A few years since a yel
low gage plum tree lost all its foliage
from leaf blight when the plums were
not fully grown and while yet destitute
of flavor. The fruit remained station
ary and unaltered until in a few weeks
a second crop of leaves came out. They
then swelled to full size, assumed their
crimson dots and received their honeyed
sweetness of flavor. The object of
pruning should be, therefore, to allow
the leaves to grow fall size without be
ing injured from crowding. We find
the following corroborative fact Btate.l
in a late number of the New England
Farmer : “We once knew of an intel
ligent lady who stripped her grape
vines of a portion of their lea\ es in
order to let in the sun and ripen the
fruit; but to her surprise where the
leaves remained as nature had disposed
them the grapes were the earliest and
every way the best. This led her to
investigate the matter,when she was de
lighted to learn that the leaves were not
only the protectors but the caterers of
tbe fruit, constantly elaborating and
supplying it with tbe pabulum it re
quired to bring it to perfection, ” —The
( London) Garden.
Solid Men of Antiquity, —There
were tbe great scripture giants, Giliath
and Og. The former was six cubits
and a span (I. Samuel, xvn. 4), va
riously estimated to be from nine feet
six to twelve feet. Og is supposed to
have been even taller, from the fact
that his bedstead is mentioned in Deu
teronomy in., 2, as being nine cubits
long. During the reign of Augustus
Cseiar we read of two giants, Iduslo
and Secundilla, who were each ten feet
high, and after their death their bodies
were kept for a long time as a wonder.
During the reign of Yitellius, he sent
Darius as a hostage to Rome with pres
ents, and among these was a Jew by
the name of Eleazar, who was ten feet
two inches high. Gabara, the Atabian
giant, was nine feet nine inches high.
The Empeior Maximus was eight feet
and six inches high. Sacobus Damiun
was eight feet. Walter Parsons, seven
feet four. William Evans, seven feet
six inches high.
“ I’m sorry to hear of your embar
rassment,” said a gentleman to a friend
who had failed heavily. * “ Not at all,”
said the latter; “keep year sympathy
for my creditors ; it is" they "who are
embarrassed.”
CARTERSYILLE, GEORGIA, THURSDAY, APRIL 15, 1875.
THR GESKRAL CHORUS.
We all keep step to the marchftig choru?,
Rising from millionH of men sroHnd.
Millions have marched to the same before up,
Millions come on, with a sea-like sound.
Life, Death; Life, Death;
Such is the song of human breath.
What is this multitudinous chorus.
Wild, monotonous, low, and loud ?
Earth we tread on, heaven that o’er ns ?
I in the midst of the moving crowd ?
Life, Death; Life, Death;
IVnat is this burden of human breath ?
On with the rest, your footsteps timing !
Mystical music flows in the song,
(Blent with it?—Born from it ?)—loftily chiming.
Tenderly soothing, it bears you along.
Life, Death; Life, Death;
Strange is the chant of human breath!
Fraser's Magazine.
“A Thorough Investigation.”
“Punch’s” Parody on the Investiga
tion ot the Causes nt the Loss ot the
Cospat rick.
A few weeks ago the emigrant ship
Cospatrick, bound from England to
Australia, was burned at sea, resulting
in tbe death of nearly all the passen
gers and crew. Punch thus describes
the investigation of tbe disaster :
“Tbe loss of the emigrant ship
Crossbones, which took fire on the voy
age to Australia, and was burred to the
water’s edge, all hands being either
burnt or drowned, with the exception
of one man and a boy, was the subject
of an inquiry held yesterday.
“ The court was composed exclusively
of ship-owners. Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz
represented the board of trade and
charterers, while Mr. Phunky attended
on behalf of the relatives of the lost
passengers and crew.
“Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz, in opening
the matter, said that they were met to
inquire into the loss of the ship Cross
bones by fire, together with nearly five
hundred lives. No doubt such unto
ward events would occur, but in order
to meet the requirements of the board
of trade, certain witnesses—including
the survivors—one man and a boy—
would be called to prove that no blame
could be attached to ariy one, and that
the vessel was all that could be desired.
“ The survivors, who had been spend
ing the morning at the owners’ office,
were then brought into court. They
looked still very ill.
“James Jonah, able seaman, deposed
that he was one of the crew of the
Crossbones ; he had been so ever since
she was launched ; she was then called
the Death’s Head. She went ashore on
her first voyage, and strained herself.
Was afterward lengthened and rechrist
ened. Everything went well till the
fire broke out. Couldn’t imagine how
she could possibly have taken fire. The
cargo was composed of pitch, tar, rosin,
oil, paraffine, petroleum, rum, brandy,
spirits of wine, fireworks, gunpowder,
Ac. Did not consider that an inflam
mable cargo. Thought the fire must
have originated in one of the water
tanks. There were quite enough boats.
None of ’em were of any use. Was
saved by clinging to a bit of a raft with
the boy.
“ Serjeant Buzfuz—And that is how
you were buoyed out. [Laughter.]
“ Witness—Was rescued by the Pe
ruvian barque Pick-me-Up, the captain
of which treated us most kindly. Hit
everybody but us over the head with
belaying pins.
“Sergeant Buzfuz was most happy to
inform the court that it had been inti
mated to him that her majesty’s govern
ment intended presenting the captain,
in the course of a year or two, with a
kaleidoscope and a tin speaking
trumpet.
“Examination resumed: Considered
the Cressbones one of the safest skips
afloat until she was lost. Would not
have the slightest objection to have
gone to sea in her again, with the same
cargo, provided he was saved, and it
was made worth his while. Considered
lucifer matches on the top of a powder
barrel or petroleum cask rather orna
mental than otherwise.
“Mr. Phunky was proceeding to ex
amine the witness, when the court ad
journed for lunch.
“On its reassembling, Mr. Serjeant
Buzfuz submitted to the court that Mr.
Phunky had no locus standi.
“Mr. Phunky said he appeared for
certain persons who were not quite sat
isfied.
“ Mr. Phunky—l mean to say that
they are not satisfied that the vessel
was well found.
“ Serjeant Buzfuz—How could she
have been well ‘ found’ when she was
lost? [Much laughter, which was not
suppressed ]
“The boy who was saved then
called, and corroborated in every par
ticular the evidence of the former wit
ness. Thought the fire might have
originated in the fore-top-gallant mast.
Felt very hot after climbing up there.
“ An experienced stevedore was then
e died by Mr. Phunky, and said that he
considered the cargo a most dangerous
one, when ho was stopped by Mr. Ser
jeant Bnzfnz, who called the attention
of the court to the fact that witness
dropped his h’s, and was evidently a
most objectionable and untrustworthy
person.
“ The court allowed the objection,
and the witness was ordered to staud
dow*.
“ The learned serjeant then said that
it appeared to him quite unnecessary to
address the court any further.
“ The court, after consulting for two
minutes and three-quarters, said that it
was certainly most unfortunate that the
majority—in fact, a large majority—of
the passengers and crew of the Cross
bones should have met with such a dis
agreeable fate, but it could not be
helped. Everything that science, ex
perience and skill, as well as petroleum,
pitch, tar, gunpowder, spirits, and other
powerful agents, could do, had been
done, and the court only hoped that the
owners were fully insured. If the un
fortunate captain were before them,
the court would have immediately
granted him anew certificate, in case
his old one should have been burnt.
The co art were unanimously of the
opinion that the cargo was of a most
harmless description and properly stow
ed They would, however, recommend
that in future the boats should not be
launched keel upward, and that when
Capt. Shaw returned from Egypt he
should be consulted upon toe best
method of suddenly extinguishing ig
nited spirits and petroleum, as well as
fireworks.
“ Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz entirely con
curred with the court, and was happy
to say that the owners were more than
fully insured.
“ The inquiry then terminated.”
Thirst at Sea.— Thirst on land is
bad enough, but thirst at sea, with
water everywhere, yet not a drop to
drink, is ieu times worse. Of the agony
conception when we read, as in the case
which it occasions we may form some
of a late pliipwreck, of the survivors of
a boat’s crew greedily drinking the
blood of < heir den J comrades. No one
knows what his civil fortune may one
day bring him to endure. For the
benefit of the reader, therefore, we
make a note of the following question
put by the board of trade examiners to
the candidates for certificates of com
petency as mates in the English mer
chant service : “ What would you do in
order to allay thirst, with nothing but
sea water at baud ?” The answer is,
“ Kesp the clothes, especially the shirt,
soaked with sea water.” Drinking salt
water to allay thirst drives the sufferer
mad ; but an external application of it
gives relief, if it dees not satisfy the
demands of craving nature. It is a
pity that this simple yet truly scientific
remedy is known to but few of those
who tempt the treacherous main.
The Enipriss of Russia’s Betrothal.
A correspondent of the Boston Ad
vertiser writes : “ I must tell yon the
circumstances of the empress of Rus
sia’s betrothal, es I learned them from
one who is very near and dear to her.
Like the princess of Wales, she was one
of a numerous and poor family ; but,
unlike that charming princess, she was
not beautiful, and no hopes were
founded upon her making a marriage
which would add glory to the modest
princess of Hesse Darmstadt. Such,
however, was destined to be the case,
and the projects of wise men were over
turned by tbe simple caprice of the
humanheart. Alexander Nicolajevitche,
grand due lieriteer, was, in the year
1841, a charming young prince of thirty
three, who, having reached the age
when it was thought necessary that he
should take a wife and perpetuate the
imperial line of Russian monarchs, went
forth on a voyage of discovery among-t
marriageable princesses, great and
small, armed with a list of the most
eligible names, and quite decided to
choose one from among them. Prinol
Orloff, who accompanied his imperiae
highness as mentor and guide, affirmed
and confirmed by each courier the state
of indifferent docility in which his fu
ture sovereign pursued his round, and
at last wrote begging l’Empereur Nicho
las to indicate a preference whioh would
help to turn the balance and decide the
important question. Before the an
swer was received fate conducted the
wanderers to the theatre, where the
first person upon whom the young
grand due’s eyes alighted attentively
was the Princess Maria Maximilianne of
Hesse modestly seated in the second
row of her father’s box. ‘ Who is that
young person?’ asked his imperial high
ness ; and when Prince Orloff replied,
he added decidedly, ‘and the future
empress of Russia.’ ‘ But her name is
not even on the list,’ cried the poor
Prince Orloff. ‘No matter, we will
make it first,’ replied the head-strong
youth, and he proved as good as his
word, the unconscious Princess Marie
was in due form demanded in marriage,
and has ever since been the faithful and
beloved of a good and great monarch.”
How a Woman Boys Meat.
When a woman enters a bntcher-shop
to select a piece of meat for dinner, she
has her mind made u > to take mutton
roast. Therefore, when the butcher
rubs bis hands and asks her what she
will have, she promptly replies :
“ I’ll take some of that mut— ”
She stops there. Her eye has caught
sight of a ham, and she suddenly de
cides to take ham.
“ Is that nice ham ?” she inquires.
“Best bam I ever saw, madame.
How much ?”
“ Well, you may give me three p
Well, I don’t know either. My hus
band was saying he’d like some sausage.
Have you any real nice sausage ?”
“ Plenty, madame. Now, then, how
much sausage will you have?”
“It’s pork sausage, is it?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Well, I suppose a pound would be
enough for our small family, but—
but—”
“Shall I weigh a pound, madame?”
“ I was just wondering if a veal pot
pie wouldn’t suit him better,” she an
swered. “ You have veal, I suppose?”
“Oh, yes, madame. Here’s a splen
did bit of veal—as good a piece as I
ever saw.”
“ Yes, that does look like nice veal,”
she says, lifting it up.
“ And you’ll t&ke it ?”
“Let’s see !” she muses. “ Y—no, I
guess not. I guess I’d better take pork
chopß.”
“Nice chops—how much?” he asks.
“ One of those slices will weigh a
pound, I suppose ?”
“ About a pound, madame.”
“ And it was a young hog ?”
“Quite young, madame.”
“And you’ll cut the rind off?”
“ Yes, madame.”
“ Well,” she says, heaving a deep
sigh, “ I guess you may give me some
beefsteak—some that’s nice, and be
sure to cut all the bone out!”
And she’s only been half an hour
coming to the point.
The Imaginative Sex.
Mr. T. W. Higgin3on believes in im
agination, and that women excel in that
high province of mind. He says : “I
rejoice that in women, at least, here, as
in Germany, the imaginative faculty
still retains its hold. I remember that
when Mr. Emerson was lecturing in
Boston, many years ago, an eminent
lawyer declined going to hear him on
the ground that Mr. Emerson was so
hard to comprehend ; ‘ but,’ he added,
‘my daughters understand him and
they go.’ The remark was generally
quoted by the lawyer’s admirers as good
satire, and by Mr. Emerson’s admirers
as good praise. Let any one notice in
our high schools, where boys and girls
recite together, which sex cares the
most for literature; and he will find
that if literature is of any value, the
preference affords grounds on whieh the
intellect of women may be defended.
Cotton Mather says that Arius sup
ported his blasphemies by first convert
ing five hundred virgins thereunto ; and
most of our poets have first won their
way by enlisting an admiring constitu
ency of women. The imaginative dis
position is there, in the feminine na
ture ; but if women have not criticised
as profoundly and created as grandly,
even in literature and art as men, it is
owing to other causes, often expounded
and forming a part of the general in
tellectual discouragement under which
they have labored. Woman has at last
fought her way into the field of fiction
and now stands at its head, both in
quantity and quality of work ; but it is
true, even here, that she has fought her
way through snee rs and < iscouragement.
It is a significant fact that the two
greatest living masters of fiction are
women who have found it for their ad
vantage to write under the names of
men.”— George Eliot and George Sand.
The entire territory of Scotland is
20,047,642 acres. Fifty-seven proprie
tors own a trifle more than one-third of
the country, and almost one-third of
this (upward of one-tenth of all Scot
land) belongs to the three richest of
them.
A Great Yolcano.
In her interesting work, “The Ha
waiian Archipelago,” Miss Isabella Bird
tells of a journey she made to the great
volcano of Manna Loa. This mountain,
which is situated somewhat to the
south of the centre of the island of Ha
waii, is the highest active volcano in
the world, rising to a height of 13,760
feet. The whole of the south side of
Hawaii down to and below the water’s
edge is composed of its slopes, its base
being 180 miles in circumference. “Its
whole bulk above a height of 8,000 feet
is one frightful desert,” though vegeta
tion, in the form of gray lichens, a little
withered grass, and a hardy asplenium,
extends 2,000 feet further up. Dnring
Miss Bird’s visit to the summit, the
thermometer registered 11 degrees of
frost. The crater Moknaweoweo is six
miles in circumference, 11,000 feet long,
8,000 feet wide, with precipitous side3
800 feat deep. The crater appears to
be in a state of constant activity, and
at times overflows, carrying destruction
to the lowest levels of tbe islands.
Since white men inhabited the islands
there have been ten eruptions from
Manna Loa. Of the condition of the
crater the following description of what
she saw on her visit, accomplished
amid hardships that few men would
care to undergo, will give the reader a
vivid idea: “When the sun had set,
aud the brief red glow of the tropics
had vanished, anew world came into
being, and wonder after wonder flashed
forth from the previously lifeless crater.
Everywhere through its vast expanse
appeared glints of fire—fires bright and
steady, burning in rows like blast fur
naces ; fires lone and isolated, unwink
ing like planets or twinkling like stars ;
rows of little fires marking the margin
of the lowest level of the crater ; fire
molten in deep crevasses ; fire in wavy
lines ; fire calm, stationary and restful;
an incandescent lake two miles in
length beneath a deceptive crust of
darkness, and whose depth one dare
not fathom even in thought. Broad in
the glare, giving light enough to read
by at a distance of three-quarters of a
mile, making the moon look as blue as
an ordinary English sky, its golden
gleam changed to a vivid rose color,
lighting up the whole of the vast preci
pices of that part of the crater with a
rosy red, bringing out every detail here,
throwing cliffs and heights into huge
black masses there, rising, falling,
never intermitting, leaping in lofty jets
with glorious shapes like wheat-sheafs,
oorruscating, reddening ; the most glo
rious thing beneath the moon was the
fire fountain of Moknaweoweo.” On
the east flank of Mauna Loa, about
4.000 feet in height, is the crater of
Kilauea, whieh, Miss Bird says, has
the appearance of a great pit on a roll
ing plain. “But such a pit! It is
nine miles in circumference, and its
lowest area, whieh not long ago fell
about 300 feet, just as ice on a pond
falls when the water below is withdrawn,
covers six square miles. The depth of
the crater varies from 800 to 1,100 feet
in different years, according as the
molten sea below is at flood or ebb.”
Among the Mormons.
The approaching trial of Lee, the
Mormon prophet, charged with being
engaged in the Mountain Meadow mas
sacre, in Utah, draws near, and a cor
respondent says the Mormons are pre
paring for some startling developments.
It is beyond question, he says, that not
only were obnoxious Gentiles put out
of the way in Salt Lake City without
any trial, but even many of “the
brethren ” were watched wbea out of
doors and quietly led to a place conven
ient for butchery, and there had there
“ throats cut,” for the double purpose
of keeping them from “opposing the
kingdom ” and atoning for their sins of
unbelief. It is said of Isaac C. Haight,
who was the lieutenant colonel of the
militia regiment that committed the
massacre at Mountain Meadows, that
he grew so fanatical and was so far re
moved from any supervisory authority
that he did as he pleased and disposed
of the lives of the obnoxious with all
the freedom of a doge of Venice. In
the little town of Cedar, the head
quarters of his militia, he is said to
have kept two of the brethren—Stewart
and Macfarlane—for that special pur
pose, and to aid at oid times in harass
ing and stealing from the passing immi
grant Gentiles.
No fewer than ten men were taken
down into the cellar beneath Haight’s
house, and from there they never came
out alive, and the only answer that was
ever made to any inquiry about a miss
ing person in those days was the la
conic sentence, “He has gone to Cali
fornia.”
To listen to the tales that are now
told by men and women of the early
times of blood one feels carried away
in reflection to dark ages aDd barbaric
nations, and it is this history that Brig
ham Young has good cause to dread
being brought to light in the forthcom
ing investigation of the Mountain
Meadow massacre, and 1 do not see how
he can prevent its exposure.
The investigation, when once begun,
will be like the letting out of water
the dam, once pierced, the breech will
widen and widen until it all is out, and
the revelations of crime will startle the
nation. Its ultimate result will be the
breaking down of a fearful superstition
and despotism and the deliverance of a
people who deserve to be free.
Strange Matches.
It is an historical fact that Frederick
of Prussia formed the idea of compel
ling unions between the tallest of the
two sexes in his dominions, in the hope
of having an army of giants. The
reader will, in all probability, recollect
the following ludicrous incident. It so
happened that, daring a rather long
ride, the king passed a particularly
tall youog woman, an utter stranger.
He alighted from his horse, and insisted
upon her delivering a letter to the com
manding officer of his crack regiment.
The letter contained the mandate that
the bearer was instantly to be married
to the tallest unmarried man in the ser
vice. The young woman was somewhat
terrified, and, not understanding the
transaction, gave an old woman the let
ter, which was conveyed to the com
manding officer and this old woman
was, in a short time, married to the
handsomest and finest man in the crack
regiment. It is not necessary to say
that the marriage was an unhappy one
—particularly so to the old woman.
In this connection comes another an
ecdote. A rich saddler directed in his
will that his only child, a daughter,
should be deprived of the whole of the
fortune unless she married a saddler.
A young earl, in order to win the bride,
actually served an apprenticeship of
seven years to a saddler, and afterwards
bound himself to the rich saddler’s
daughter for life. But the- union was
anj thing but a happy one ; the bride,
neither by birth nor breeding a lady,
reflected little credit on ber brice
groom’s choice ; and repeated quarrels
were followed by separation. So it is
with all unequal matches; gold and
brass won’t unite. Common sense say s,
“ Young folk, marry within the bourt
darv of your social and religious circle.”
There is, then, no reasonable ground
for complaint and recrimination. Many
matches which might, with ordinary
prudence, have proved at least mode r
ately comfortable, so far as regards the
dispositions of the parties, have, through
the inequality of their social relations,
proved miserable, because, like the
Prussian king, they did not well con
sider what they were abont.
Woman a Beast of Burden.
With all their fine culture and artisl ic
instincts, the Germans are not admira
ble in the arts aad elegancies of life.
There is among men none of the chiv
alrous deference and regard for women
that marks American manhood. In the
upper ranks women hold a tolerable
place, but in the lower snd middle sta
tions, she is a breeder or beast of bur
den, merely ; in tbe lower ranks she is
merely the latter, a beast of burden.
The work that men do in America is
done wholly by women here. There ii
no kind of farm work that they do not
perform; no manual labor on field,
or manufactory’ that they are not called
on to do. Indeed, there are but two
classes of laborers in the German cities
and villages, men over 45 and women of
all ages. The youth of the land, when
too old to go to school, must go into
the army, the daughters must take their
places in the field. You may walk from
the Rhine to the Danube, and you will
see in all the operations of toil, on the
farm especially, seven women to one
man at work ! Under these conditions
is it wonderful that German woman are
shriveled and unlovely? That softness
of voice or delicacy of feature have
perished wholly from the feminine par:
of the population ? You will find fine
looking men, for army life is by no
means laborious. Reflecting on" the
conditions nnder which these later gen
erations of Germans came into the
world, it is simply marvelous that the
whole raca is not one of hideous de
formity and mental imbecility. It is
impossible to think that this" raoe of
mothers could bear anything else than
physically decrepit and mentally ina
pt rfect beings. It i3 atrocious enough
t see women doing the hardest labor
of men in the field, but German life
exhibits other phases of feminine use
fulness, to which this is the lilies and
langors of life. In every country oi
Germany it is a common practice for
women to do the work of horses. You
may see it in this elegant capital of
Dresden and in the surrounding vil
lages, if you walk a block. With wide
straps over their shoulders and across
their breasts, their feet shod in wooden
shoes, their hands generally bare,
the women of the land may be seen
in masses taking the places of horses,
day in and day out, through every
province of Germany. These masters
of tbe Enropean world see nothing
wrong in this. They continue on their
way perfecting the machinery of war,
swallowing up the manhood of the na
tion in the pursuit of dominion. At
America, and her ways, means, and peo
ple, the German raises the voice of
scorn. A benighted people, they say, in
the wilderness as to education, and bar
barous as to manners. None but the
Germans know ho v to enjoy life ration
ally, they as good as declare. Mean
time, wiiat is the enjoyment of the
millions of mothers who share the har
ness before donkey carts with cows and
dogs? If we have no universaties of
Heidleberg, Liepsic, Bonn, and Berlin,
with their wonderful diffusion of prac
tical and elegant learning, we have
nothing of this at least.
From five in the morning until long
after dark at night as you stand by the
oity ga’es you will see this singular
spectacle kept up, the employes pre
senting the same general appearance,
here a woman and two dogs, there a
woman aud a cow, and presently two
women and no dog, and so on. These
carts supply the produce of daily con
sumption in the towns, wood, coal, po
tatoes, and the like. In most cases the
head of the house accompanies these
novel cortege, but never in harness. He
holds the reins, or the whip, and
smokes the stump that you see inva
riably in the German’s teeth. Having
disposed of the load by dint of tug
ging through miles of cobbled streets,
the weary women return at night home
ward, the master of the cortege, who
aided with his counsel only in the work
of the day, not unfrequently stretching
himself in the empty cart to be hauled
home by the docile drudges of his house
hold. Yet these are the mothers of the
sons that conquered the first military
nation of Europe, Franoe. Even un
der the best conditions, women do not
hold the place iu Germany that is con
ceded them in America. A man’s wife
is virtually his chattle. The law
awards it so, and custom sanctions it.
This is marked in a hundred ways. In
the streets, for instance, there is none
of the respectful courtesy shown the
sex that may be seen in the remotest
backwood town of America. The side
walks in all tbe German cities, save the
new part of Berlin, are merely single
blocks of pavement jutting from the
bnildiDg. No matter how wet the day
or how muddy the streets, a German
never thinks of stepping out to give
the lady the walk. Quite the contrary,
if she doesn’t flee she is rudely jostled
into the slush as if she were a beast.
Ablaze With Diamonds.
The Boston Transcript tells this glit
tering story : “A lady blazed all over
with diamonds at a Fifth avenue party
recently. On each shoulder she had
four stars, the size of a dollar, made of
diamonds, her hair was set thickly with
diamonds ; there was a diamond bande
let on her brow ; she had diamond ear
rings, and a diamond necklace; upon
the sides of her chest were two circles
of diamonds, from which depended
lines and curves of diamonds reaching
to her waist, upon which she wore a
diamond girdle; on her skirt in front
were large peacocks wrought in lines of
diamonds ; there were rosettes of dia
monds on her slippers, and diamonds,
large and small, all over her dress and
person, wherever they could be placed.
The lady’s grandfather was a cartman,
her father was a pawnbroker, and her
husband—well, he lives upon her father.
Tne old gentleman is worth his mil
lions, and still follows his business and
tends to his store. He is never present
at these parties although.”
The six foliies of science are said to
be tho following : The quadrature of
the circle, the establishment of perpet
ual motion, the philosopher’s Rtone,
the transmutation of metals, divina
tion, or the discovery of secrets by
magic, and, lastly, judicial astrology.
VOL. 16--NO. 16.
sayings and doings.
Mark Twain says : “To the poor
whites along the Mississippi river chills
are a merciiul provision of Providence,
enabling them to take exercise without
exertion.”
Dobe’s picture of the “ Seventh Cir
cle of Dante’s Hell” contains 900 fig
ures. Those in the foreground are the
size of life. They ere grouped in a
circle about Dante and Virgil, who are
on a central eminence,
At a horticultural exhibition in Paris
last fall, several gourds were exhibited
that had gourds of other varieties
grafted on them. The operation was
performed by introducing the stem of
a gourd through' the skin of one to
which it was to be joined.
Persons planting omt fruit trees are
informed by several experienced in the
matter that black walnut trees exert an
injurious influence on some other va
rieties, as the maples. It is according
ly desirable to plant them to them
selves.
There is an arlerian well in Mission
Bay, near San Francisco, over half a
mile from the shore. It is 200 feet
deep, and tbrongh a pipe eleven inches
in diamoter fnrnishe* 100,000 gallons
of pure fresh water every twenty-four
hours.
The following puzzle is again on its
rounds: “To five and five aod fifty
five the first of letters add, ’twill make
a thing tli&t killed the king and drove a
wise man mad.” It was published first
about twenty years ago, and bar never
teen correctly answered. But they say
there is an answer.
Spring baa conoo, Spring ha come, Spring has
come;
Hark! the feathered songsters tune their notes
of jov—
(tn a cage.)
Hark, the lowing herd! List, the warbling
bird
Gaily, smiling, budding, blooming Spring has
oome!
fin a horn.)
A nADT went to pay her respects to
one of the latest arrivals on the list of
babyhood, when the following colotjuy
took place between her and the little
four-year-old sister of the new comer :
“I’ve come for that baby now,” said
the lady. “You can’t have it,” was the
reply. * “ But I must have it—l came
over on purpose,” urged the visitor.
“We can’t spare it all,” persisted the
child; “but I’ll get a piece of paper
and you can cut a pattern.’
“ Which, To-day, Abe.”—
Sweet flowers.
Ye were too faire,
With drooping lids,
Among your heavie morning tearea,
I found ye.
Faire buds!)
I left ye there,
For sorrow bids
Brief greeting to gay youth, it fearos,
To wound ye.
But deare roses, in yonr noone
(TUat graceful, merrie prime)
I stole away the lovely boone,
And was V. not a crime
To rob the wooing aire,
Of yonr sweet breath ?
Ah! daintie flowers,"
The wanton hours
Of midday’s golden shine
Will see ye pine,
To-morow, and so fade|
Away to death.
A qood natdbep but bothersome old
bore, who loafs about our office a good
deal, explained his projects tha other
day and what he proposed doing with
his sons: “ There’s Jim, now, he’s
idle an’ lazy and worthless. I think I’ll
send him to West Point an’ make a offi
cer out of him. Then Ephraim, who’s
stupid and good-looking. I’ll metamor
phose into a preacher. John is a pious,
religious, well-meaning youth, an’il do
first-class for an editor. But Ned,
Ned’s my hope, he’s a cute, sharp, in
telligent chap, as’ll make a name for
himself; I’m goin’ to set him up in a
saloon and cigar shop next week!”—
Washington Capitol.
PUBLIC DEBT.
Kegular illanthly Statement-Decrease
In 3larcli $3,681,810.
The public debt statement, shows a
decrease in the public debt during
March of $3,681,210 :
Bonds at 6 per cent.... $1,149,135,000
Bonds at 5 per cent... 674,253,750
Total .' ...t1,723.388.650
DEBT BEAMSO INTEREST IN LAWFUL MONEY
Lawful money debt $ 14.678.000
Matureddebt 7,373.650
DEBT BEARING NO INTEREST.
Legal tender notes $ 37,929,882
Certificates of deposit 43.045.000
Fractional currency 44.343,209
Coin certificates 24,191,990
Total without intereet ..$ 490,878,991
Total debt. $2,236,919,292
Total intereet 29,048,419
CASH IN THE TREASURY.
Coin i 84,105,520
Currency 518,252
Special deposit held for redemp
tion of certificates of deposit,
as provided by 1aw........... 4.354.000
Total in treasury f 132.332,933
DEBT LESS CASH IN TBEASCRY
Debt less cash in treiieury $2,133,634,778
Decrease of the debt during the
past m0nth........; 3,681,210
BONDS ISSUED TO PACTfIC RAILROAD COMPANIES.
INTEREST PAYABLE IN LAWFUL MONEY.
Principal outstanding $ 64.623.512
Bnnds issue! to Pacific Railroad
Companies, intereet payable
in lawful money, principal
outstanding debt $61,623,512
Interest accrued and not yet
paid 969,352
Interest paid by United States. 26,264,102
Interest repaid by transporta
tion of mails, etc 5,943,748
Balance of interest paid by the
United States 20.320,354
A Mexican Annexation Scheme.
The New York Sunday Mercury has
a Washington dispatch alleging that
the excursion of Senator Cameron and
others to Mexico has for its object the
annexation by purchase by the United
States of the northern States of that
republio. The Mexican authorities are
understood to have already acquiesced
to the transfer, the terms of which are
yet to be settled. The territory pro
posed to be annexed is all that part of
Mexico lying north of the Rapido river
and the Rio Grande de Santiago, com
prising the states of Sonora, Chihua
hua, Coahuela, Nueva Leon, Cinaloa,
Durango and Zacatecas, one half of
Tamaulipas, one-third of Jalisco, a
small portion of San Luis Potoai, and
the territory of Lower California, alto
gether about 438,000 square miles of
territory, and over 1,500,000 population
of whom less than 500,000 are whites,
the rest being Indians and mixed races.
The boundary line will commence at
the mouth of the Rapido, following
that river to its source to ward the town
of Penos in latitude 25-35, longitu le
101-70, thence to the source of the river
Santiago, and along that stream to its
month. The movement is understood
to have originated with the Mexican
i authorities, who desire to see this
sparsely settled country placed uuder a
power possessing the meansol enforcing
order among its population and of in
viting emigration tbiibej;.