Newspaper Page Text
i^QETky.
tmi.
The a or 14 ia full <4 funny ibiaga,
I'd like to t.,nn * * m> over .
It’trtftinny bow tlre half i rag*,
The other half )• clover.
Il’a funny bow Ibe [w'/i man seek*
To live among hfa belter*
It’a fi tiny bow tbe drunkard bug*
If. adamantine fetter*.
It’* funny how the pretty girl
Walk* out with smile* and simper#,
Hut when berm* deeir*-* her help
At kitchen wtk 4, whimper.
U* funny 10. . Uu. unarl young beau,
'I tic male . ol life Itegindiu',
f/< 1 ►! ug In le-il,- w liilc tome poor son!
I < Wttabmg out hi* linen.
Il’* -hinny heir ti.c giiaaip-iiLi,
With aktany lip, will mutter,
‘‘Now don't you tell for all the world
'Twa* Angelina Cutter.”
Ji' tunny bow tbe neighbor* will
Your weekly paper borrow,
And then return it, read to death,
A fortnight from "In morrow "
A i.aiiil.i.ii.o lalila* aintcgr
Wlm play* divinely on the harp
Hut cannot cook a dinner,
ft'* funhy that 11 Imre will nay,
'How angel like your baby,”
And widi it nt the antipodean
Or to perdition, may be.
It'alunny how an me pgoglMalk
Of love within a cottage,
Yet never try It while their r ath
Will buy them city pottage.
li'a lunny bow the ndlllonare
Will tall the begg.r bonry
'I bat he was never at a lbs*
Kor labor or for money
It'* tunny how the cl*uk will say
"'Tin of the latest fashion.
And when it's proved of last year's make
fly off into* paaanon.
!.c> fciw the lady guy
Will shun her si * degraded,
And smile upon the libertine,
Thou " lil* charm* are faded.
I" aim, n firriny wirrld.
And Ibd oi troth and fiistrin.
hlnk soiii 'twill burn ii : .'.}
Dlwnvi rtMK 111!' Thiel.
Nl‘k Bo* i'M >m n innnltpr <1 lll#' origt
dhl ( luixlv Minstrels, a Mil, In one tiny, was
lli greatest "middle roan nml interrogator'
known in the profession Nlrk used in tell,
witli great merriment, nn tnrhtcnr of his
boyhood To |trwr> the flavor of lhr re
latlon, wo will record In Nick's own lan
•* only regret that we cannot ac
company It with hie Inimitable gnatimU
Hon.
~ *bn- - ~T
"Hn*, wee n prmry steaty nl<l gent, but
twict hi ■ While lieWowld get ol.llvimn. a n ,f
wnlrr wm not the muse of It. I recollect n
c. ruin holiday Was approaching, ao 1 I
lir.l hern around to get a Hill.-
money to have a time witli l one that day ;
hut the fate* and pure*. Wi re against me
It weabut two di*y* prior to the anticipat
ed holiday, and hadn't narry a red Itemem
her lb If, buys; when I add llialou the sane
afternoon I came into the hour*, w hen lo t
there on the floor, totally evercorne by hia
libation*, by my respected daddy, and be
aidc him lay aU shining half dollar* whl 1.
had rolled frtnn Ida pocket. Boy*, I've been
an honest man all my life, but oner when
a bay I committed a theft, 1 hooked one
ol thoae hall dollara. Thinks lto myself
the old man’s been on a jan.borce, and
won’t know how much he’s spent, and will
never n.iw it. Itnt mark you, the next
rooming I and my two brothers were sum
moned Into our father’s presence. The old
man’s lace lowered. 1 thought o! the hall
■I-liar, and knew that a storm waa brew
ng ”
“Boys," said ho, “last night whan l rams
home I had sis half dollar*. One ol Vm’a
gone. Yoar mother didn't take it. There’*
tieen no one else in the house. Which one
of you took it ?’’
We all protested our innocence.
“Boy*," said the old man, "that half-dol
kr never walked off, and I’m going to find
out which one of you took it.”
Turning round, h* took down from the
wall mi .<ld Hint lock blunbcrhue* Tills he
and“ > ii Iv loHileil with powder and buck
our presence j then ‘as'eniug It up
-01 ' I.e table cocked it, tied a siring to the
itei't, hick a seat behind It, holding the
iling ir. hi* hand, aud in solemn tones ad
dressed ly.: „
“B <oing to discover the thief atv
punish u <l the same time. You must
tch of you blow into the nirric of tiiat
aUD. Whcu the guilty one blows, off gnes
his head. Now then you have a chauce ;
will you own up or blow ?”
“Ben,” said the old man to my oldest
brother, "have you got that half-dollar ?"
“No, air.”
“Take a blow.”
Ben did so in safety.
"N.cit," ( h boys, 1 tell you the chills be
gan lu e rlwi down my back,) “got that half
doilar?"
"No, sir” said I, with a defiant swagger.
“Blow in that gun.’*
I walked up bravely, g*Te a blow, and—
odged 1
-Nick,” said the old mao, in a voice of
thunder, “where is that half-dollar ?”
He bad me. Truth dodged out of met
ciaid I, “Out in the barn, pap.”
—**■— *7
The Superior Court denies anew trial to
tfUikea, and he will probably lc bnog
“■•w’sTrkks TANARUS”
There it a doctor in thie city who ha* a
speaking-tube leading from the main >n
11 ranee of hi* building to hi* office, which is
up just a few flight*. Kor several day* paat
Ia smart young wag named Hwartz I>*>
amused birnselfby calling for tbe docton 1
ibr *ugb tbe pipe, ami then profanely or -
dering him to set out on an excursion to
Tartarus. Kor some lime this fun was ta
1 ken in good part until tne fine humor ot
‘ the joke no longer tier//foe apparent Ac
cordingly, one afternoon, the declple of Ke
cipaptus provided h;mseit vritli a temkettie
of wafer, heated to about 21 (f degree* Fahr
c cep, and wailed along wl Uie pljie
I’rruy *jen the old familiar sound came up
j tbio' The pipe, -s iy, Doe, how'* Tricks •* ,
j "Trick# la better' now I guetn he'll get :
-w-d, --fq,eul,|, ,| the d ’jrrfrrr, Tenr , rrre^" r oST~|
after ilia tea-kettle,
"WliUfjl been tbejnalter with birn * j
I “He's got burnt.**
•flow r
"I’ll tell in a miriul' ”
"'Ob, you go to
Tbe doctor had finished bis last sen lent e
and tberi let a '|U*rt of scalding **Mi .
down ll*e pipe Hwartz bad bis mouth ov
n it, arid when tle water struck it tie was
>Oll,l wlntt surprised WtU 1 w: a;,!
.brprtw, him, but hot water war an one*
peeled novelty.
'I In: man above poire-l in the Water fur 1
about a minute and then looked out of tbe
window. Tbe *m trl yourtsf in to wnge *,
ting along on the sidewalk at a pretty five
ty gnlt, having evidently got Up from a
, silting poalure lie w.ti IffTi/g Ito yell “po
; (Hi, A lend bail an hour afterward lie.
I lonnd himself able to #teak, ami tuquircri
| “Did Mint lx,Her esplosion hurt anyleidy 7 ”
j (Han Krauubuai (.bromcle.
llnsltls lllnta.
Wiirm brcd “p*‘ ki - thc atoiuac-h Ii n
cat It,'
The Ue>l nnd Mifrsl tiHilhwssk in Ui'
wothl i* tepid water
Two nkp r ions should no! <>■ I ;> y lie
mine loom i Ijic same lime
In sleeping don't "cm 1" lli< Isely Hlrep
I* siinigo, A, ■ #<k-> ■* 1 M Autju
loWa.
A (nisei) diet of animal and vegetable
food la Ibe beak Ihe vegetable pot lion
hliimili! predominate.
Wafer standing ft>r some time in s room
pur* from the n Drink fr*h*water,
j Whouvm pie < r>(*l or "o>g
gy" bread commits a erlme ngnlnsi hi*
pliyalckl well being, nnd milsl pay Ho (ten
; ally.
Muslr has 11 great curative powei An
emlwwnt’pliyielsi, says Tbsl .went, geilllt
rinisli- might ftrijuentljr s ivu Hie life ol n
dying man, —j
Smillgiit is in: ' ,in' ii’ "I CliWirfulin
Dole it to the sir k ehiim) r Heinemlirr
Hint plntits In Ibe dark become ah kly.
Ip tlio sunlight.
nurd Rolled l!ggs,
A Story is told nt n negrn in Virgin’s ,
*irr llireatened to give him ftaa
Itto-jrtt hr tirntml his h int again
Next morning tli eggs csine to tin tuir.i
still harder than before.
You ranral shnutrd the enraged planter
didn't I tell ymi to et>k th<w egc* •'•n’
Yes, tiinss i, said the frighten'd slave.
an’ 1 got up at i o’clock <li ®or lyin’, ami
biled iletn live hour*, an’ It seeTU to me 1
never kin git dwe eggs aoiter !
During tbe war one of nur northern hotel
keeper* wa* on a visit In Norfolk. The egg"
came to the table boiled hard,
j 1,0 <k here, snkl tbe hotel keeper, Hatnbo.
i these eggs are Imiiod 100 bird. Now, take
i iiiy walidi and boll some three minutua by
| it.
.... ..
He gave the negro hi# splendid "gold
] waleh. In about five minule* the ftredman
; returned with Ibe egg* and watch on th*
same plate. The watch wa* wet.
S What have von been doing to my watch’
! asked the northern visitor. Why, it's *ll
wet *
Yes, sab, aid the negro. I biled dr
wtcl wid do eggs. All right di* 'time i
• th.
<
A Fuwkt Mistakb.—A marriol Johnny
went niarrbiug borne blind drunk tbe other
night, and thought he wa* climbing into
Ihe window of his honae, but got Into the
hog peo instead, where a flat porker lay
quietly snoozing. Taking off his clothe*
he hung them over tbe trough, and laid him
down beside hia "Belay,” a* he thought.—
After grumbling awhile at Betsy for breath
ing *0 loud, he began feeling around for
(be cover, and aoliUgulaed:
"Mighty enrna. Kiver must 'a fallen on
er floor— probblv tinner boil. 1 say. of
ooman. how y’r got yerself fixed? Bess
f-els offel rums— brissels ! *i* is a remaka
! hie coincicurrenee ! Old gal 'as aadljr ebang
ied sins las' wo met Wunner werezer 'ed.
(Gel’s hold of Ihe hog’s tail) Ha—ha—
-1 hie—l say, Bess, how y'r got y’r hair fixed?
Beat* aM—twle’ed, squitkd—hie—like a
heathen Chinee. liePs unwrap it, Xk
tighter'n 'ell—ao'm L Disgnstin way to
, wear hair. Don't care a d—n If it* style or
I n ot—‘s got to come down. Say, where's
y’r nose ? Strange—you had a nose. Now
look y’r, old ooo.an, this—hie—d—n fool
i*hue*a’a pereceded fur nuff- Perduce that
note, or ’ll ki—hk—you .outer bed.
The man’s wile, attracted by tbe noise,
appeared upon the scene at this critical
moment and managed to get her inebriated
lord iu'o the liou-e, he muttering alt the
white:
"At’* not right. Bess—take ’vantaga my
feeble condishun to turn me outer house
sod home. Be sorry for ziz w’o y’r get—
hie —sober."
While the United State* troop* are being
ratigbtercd Slaughtered by score* by the
Indian.'*, and the War DepakmeoLaad the
Njgneril-In Chief of the Array, Hbermat.
are anxccou 10 consult with the President
of the United Stales in regard to it, they
hod that officer on a junketing tour, im
; possible to be reached for that purpose
At ia>l accoam* be was-baring a good time
with some cliuten spirit* and in* sUid of
horses *1 bis farm in Missouri It j* s#M
that the President hart his horse* led out tr>
him 3*d expatiated eio/p-ntiy on tbtir good
1 point* Though he is no great shakes at
an inaugural or a reception speech, be can
talk horse nkr an oracke, atid know* more
about suxfflc bris sod cheek-reins than hr
doe* about Wchstei Dictionary or the
< ocULution He is, evidently, Alter for s
jtr/crta.or.jotikeyntfeam "hr-tr ferPrtwideiTt
of the United ritatrj! General flats.
has telegraphed that ’he 'i'residentii tour
tots wtH return to Wrrrirrrrgttjir rtzwnorrow
when a Cabinet meeting is to be Wrivcaed
|Hv. New*.
T*K (,Al h Hi cr tac-M.r SfAiao.—H-.fi I
lot flsyarj, of Defewwe. in a very vigorous
sjwcv h on ttie Louisiana <pieiiofi, made lie
fore tue adjournment ot <;oßgre*, m *‘V
this apt retort on the majority in tk >iei.
so- : . ‘ ’
-your pr,i',t:(4t party tirvl da TEcSc If:
years unhmiled (cmlrol of every branch of
•hi Kederal Hovernrnenl. Congrem has
made nnd unmade the k 'Sie tiovernmi'nu
in tb* Honth at will, and there b> no el
inehl Of i/>i government f>f whief. y U
party majority are not rm(oft*ibte. Th*
mingled Web of ignorance and hu l, of
and vena ily oi—r>|<i lly —fco-l
crime, in whose meshea those unhappy
rnmluuuUi** are vainly *ruggttng. Was wo
veti by your ban>l alone And when )•>
-caiiinirhniTtr 11, you put in the tVof ! {it tut
'' . !
hu< li has l>eeii since the cios# > f the wr
the bistory rtf your rule, such it will c/m*
tin'ie Ui I Ultlil 11,.r a1i...l l.ulll ut y. I.a
Mile ,s change/), ami y<m to >o*tain
ignorin'• and rue in the r contest with ihe
Villus and li.tciiigen. <- n| i
lice,
” ■ -W...!*• •
What Would bavn-ls’e.i tin thoughts of
melt statesmen a* I .'lay, W<-b*(rr, JrfTvivtn
Menton, and the tent* of otl.ris who tear*
I
gfme down to honored gr.,ve:i, and whose
itantes wilt be revere..re.| long as -he
trfarrirynf the rjrsgt A m-RcpotTSc
’•bull live had they tier.. p riuiUf.) to r*
tun. to the Senate (hain tier while the
members of that body were disr'udng tin
'l'lesllor. whether some ol tlieir member*
should continue to occupy seats among
theiu, ut were )uUy cnt.Uad to.-sll* <n Ur*
■penitentiary-* Ttirr asfi;r*tior. of rhene
venerable men trorr- of an ent r rrfy itiffcrrrT
-1 or.vi*u ff***.. tltst wb+eb a. tnatetj fiirg
tmin. <i irflel.l,l .llax, Fuller* mi A Cos., of
tirrdit AlohltUr norrnptio i; they bred, not
to b hated and <Jej>!*ed r.. w.i* - -
ruplion, dishonor, am! (Hu|ury, bo* U. be
hottorr-t arid lovr.t, and tn make 1 namr
... me History of (~.r rouii rr that futon
gprifrotlon* shafl be promt Own The
names tlartteW, ttctJas 4- <v. furr - fuTT.
tm-;tieru;r:vrs, it,, Ttr-....., „[
these Modifier Sen 1 1 ur - < nr,., i, n
•vhrn 1-o.vlr .s’e.l with .1, e . 1 Ct 1., Wi fi
Ji r .ml o'til rs of ftirn ; H r,utor
contrast between the l.nnnrrd pa f amt it.e
.-t.-ii slto.g present { W.i-ud III) Times
A Smssor Anvv.jrrrnv Mr ll.d'ih s
stun' drank more than bis usual allowance
of rum and sugar one rnfctnfgtn t*l week,
the mu sequence n( which was he gave his
wife a rather confused account ol ids c >r
duct on his return horse
"Mr. Smith's grocery store iayiUid me to
go in and drink mutin Sam and you aee
the weather was dry — and I was very aiopy
' —lff I didul mind punaliio’ one drink
*nd It’a queer how tuy head went into the
punch, though I The way home waa *n
| dir./y that l slipped upon \ little dog—the
corner of *he sties.t hit roe-and an old
gentleman stopped ear* and brass
collar on bis neck said he belonged tn the
dog—and I waa-you understand—bk—
dial i, I don't know nothing more about it.
t'l rise for inlormation,’’ said oDe of the
dullest of the member* of ad America nleg
islature. “I am very glad to hear it,” said
one who wm leaning over the bar, |or no
one wants it more than youtaelt.’’ Another
member rone Ur speak on the bill to abolish
capital puniahmeut, and commenced by
saying, "Mr. Speaker, the generality of
mankind in general are disposed to exer
cise oppression on the generality of man
kind in gene**L" “Too had better •tap,"
o®© wfeo wis Qfif enough to
, pull him by the coat tail ; "you had better
! stop—you are coming out of the same hole
you went in at.’’
Charlbs F. Adams' account as aibitra
) tor for the United States at the Genera
Tribunal was recently closed at Washing
ton, he receiving $?2,500 in gold for ju*t
one year’s service. He was allowed the
same pay per annum that he received as
Minister to England, with an additional
sn,ooo for traveling expenses.
I
South Carolina has now a sound Re
publican representative in Congress who
once proposed in the Legislature of that
Stat3 to sell every tree negro in the State
into slaveiy, and a Republican Governor
who tore down the United States flag from
Fort Sumpter and trampling it in the dost,
‘hoisted the rebel flsg in its placet There is
loyalt) " for ye.
A son of James, the EnglLh novelist, is
the editor efa Wisconsin paper.
1873. 1873.
’
—
h — r —~ ~t
’ ' w *-- - ■
yTnT^-awr
~
9
y
• — /
... „ „„„ '.nee. —~
is NOW IS FULL BUST
=—
ONLY i2 A YEAR]
r w
sumif Twr Ctßffl riPKI
*■
l.iirj luuu ni iiii>iti|,ri •n >
t> oUwuisi stuwriror tor mr
t I uilt 4<vts sst uut * I
- r-~
Only $2 a Year In ADVANCE
c •
Hereafter all the Lfgal adt rr
Using *f Herta ether Caaaiy
Wflt aypear la IM* pap# r
•> „..l
ry Row friend*, we aak one and A
sssulo u* in the enterpnw. Tbe Jpwpee
only TWO DOLLARS A YEAR, *"
every family * • cosinty tbould have +
Address, or cal! and we
WM.T.RXVILL, Editor,
Greenville, G.
|
MOORE MARSH Sc CO..
Wholesale
‘ / * "J*
DEALERS IN
rr / —= * 1
L>i‘> GcxmL-s
ISTot ions.
’ 7
/ ,
f
BOOTS, SHOES,
—— I -1
■ ' -
_ - •
~TrTirnn.il Ws[a. ’nd'y-Trr'r bv 1
\\ merchant*, ferfoir lurcli.*ll,? riw
where, to c*!l anri rwmmr '.nr airak thr
in the ‘Vr’.Ui IMdfbUe !* • it)£ dt|i
bought
‘ ■'• >. ,c 0
N
>/7.'/ 7/ I / ' > II
'
. QRirrts, , ■ • .osoßoi
|--X ' ''
v- \ * - . \
!• . ■ . \
| HAYB* N"W “ 1 'HE. AND
vfii! thr Hifh \ - ,r> . uahy
LARGEsnd WELL ASSORTED BTO< K
of
X- X
Fall ami Wintrr Goad*.
'
i
j
tf Th#nkfiil for the LONG and LIB
ERAL PATRONAGE eetended m me, 1
rMMßftiuU* lagilgL a frifltinflafVC* Of \ h**
. 1.
same, and pledge myself to m.akt it L f*e
INTEREST* Q tsafenwr* to
- *
9
NOTICE. —AII persona utdebteii to
me lor GOODS, are rupirtfully requeate
to cal! and settle. All debts are consider
ed due, hy Griffin merchants, early in tbe
Sail a* Cotton can be apWL And I now
give notice to ALL, that I am compelled
to have money to pay my debt* this FALL
and WINTER, and will not wait for any
part another year. J. A. BEEKS.
November 6 fc lßTS.t lj
♦
TUM.HU, STEW ART * BECIa.
f —-i.
I : — 1 :
Hardware
i
!Vl< ■ r< *1 mills.
AIX ANT A. GA„
1 ntoSfTvT H I. KIM'U.VLL HOI lE
Mamnacturci > A.: .N and Dewier* in
_ af! kiuds of
HARDWARE, .
■*“ X ... Jlf'OLl _■
BIEEL
( I TLERY,
TOOLS OF ALL KINDS,
•BUILDERS' and
CARRIAGE MATERIAL
Agents for Bill’s Sbineie Machine*. Syoa
tn-jre Powder (hwnruihy'* Rifle
and Blasting Powder Mill
Slone* ami Rolling
Ctotdrs. Pmpri
t-'t* >d Ihe
x iUhooks' ~
,
atiti Hat Srmi I’rK'**.
■. ' •••• )v. . , tt
. W
f ‘
lit’ H r roe do lVhi.h R tv, ,r ..,
and m ns ~.-p.„i hsml n uttlplv i. < .
‘ • *”i :■' Retail R. U lunls ml ItianisH
Jail gl-n
1 dhUVthK, HT*|V K STTdHE
ll IF JON LIS.
" ‘ ' : t ■ I- "a 1 ■ 1
V r * 4 r<r < uTi.j
Mh • * >*: *rti} Ib faii \h VntT jr
n*J
TIN WARE.
C'MIKI.VG AND IIEVTING STOYEA
Ot r-.tr. u •rript ion. i wry, in store *r4 said
As cheap a# th* **m< rpialitr of Htoro# '
can be #o!d anywhere.
htstove REPAIR.^
For any; .Stove now mjide. furnished a
SHORT NOTICE.
To Merchants.
Merchants can bare any Atlanta bill of Tin
ware duplicated with freight added.
LAMP GOODS.
A Complete Assortment of
* a t
LAMPS AND LAMP GOODS,
Off" Wry Cheap for Casl.jEJ
Orerrawet bj m*if win receie* pioinpl tttat.r.n
Satktactif a guaranteed !
f. b? ij W B. JONES.