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VOL. I—NO. 7. C|e fjamiltmt Visitor D. W. D. BOUIaLY, PBo^BifeToft. CASH SUBSCRIPTION RATES. One copy one year $2 00 One copy six months $i 00 One copy three months • • 75 Any one ftirnishinsr five subscribers, with the money, will reeeiVc a copy free. Subscribers wishing their papers changed from one post-office to another, must state the name of the post-office from which they wish it changed, as well as that to which they wish it seut All subscriptions must be paid in a'dvan'ce. The paper will be Stopped at the end of the time paid for, unless subscriptions are pre viously renewed. |£- titty numbers complete the year. CASH ADVER USING RATES. Spaed | 1 mo | 3 nios I 6 mos t 12 flVds 1 inch $2 60 $4 50 *6 00 $lO 0,1 2 “ 450 725 11 00 18 00 3 • 500 9 Oil 15 00 22 00 4* “ 550 ll 00 lo 00 27 00 l col GSO 14 00 26 00 35 00 1 col 12 50 |25 00 40 00 GO 00 1 col |22CO! 4MI I 62 00 100 00 Marriages aud deaths not exceeding six lines, published free. Payments quarterly in advance according to schedule laths, unless otherwise agreed upon. Persons sending advertisements will state the ieng'h of time they wish th .m published and the spa'ct! they, want them to occupy. Parties advertising by contract (or a given time, frill l*> charged extra for everything outsile of their legitimate business. LEGAL ADVERTISEMENT*. Sheriffs fales>, inch, four weeks. .$3 50 “ mortgage ti fa sales, per inch, eight weeks ..... 5 50 Citation for letters of administration or guardianship, th'rty day*..... 3 00 Notice to debtors and credilois, lorty day 5 00 Application for leave to sell land, four weeks Sales of land, etc , p.r inch, forty days 5 00 *• perishable property, |itl’ inch, ten tlayg .. .. . ■—• •••••• 200 App'icatiou for letters < f dismissicti from guaidianship, forty days... 500 Application for letters of dismission from administration, three months 7 50 Establishing lost paptrs, the lull space of three months, per inch 1 00 Compelling titles from executors or administrators, where bond lias been given by the deceased, tho f ill space of three months, per it ch, 7 FstraV notices, thiity days .... 3 to Rule for foreclosure of mortgiitfc, four months, monthly, per inch 0 00 Site of insi,'vent papers, thirty Homestead, two weeks 2 00 Business Cards LITER Y AN I) SALE STABLE, At llie I’rtck Corner, Within, twenty s'eps of the Car-shed, WEST POINT, GA. W. L. WILLI ms. Proprietor. TIIOS. S. MITCtItLL, M. D, Rcsiilrnt Physician and Stirgeon, HAMILTON, GEORGIA Rprt’ift! itlh titlon riven to Operative Sur gerv and treatment ot Chronic Diseases. IV I- ins casii. Jas. M. Motolcy Will continue to practice law iu all the Slate anti Uuitcd States Couits, (flue, llandltoti. Ua. DEL. A. Bussell, ATTORNEY AT LAW, HAMILTON, GEORGIA O' Special a Wntion given to collectfoil?. ~CIIATTATIOOGHEE HOUSE, By J. T. HIGGINBOTIIEM, WEST POINT, GA II E N RYC. CAME It ON , Attorney at laic, HAMILTON , QA Dll. J. W. CAMERON, HAMILTON, GA. Special attention to Midwifery. Charge? moderate. What makes a Jtushel. ARTICLES. POUNDS. Dried Apples 26 Bran.. 20 Bailey i 4 s Beans it Cow Peas *> u White Beans *>*' Castor Beans 46 Buckwheat. '*•’ Stone Ci at... <. 80 Shelled Cora. 50 Corn in the cat. 70 Corn Meal 50 Plaateiin; Hair . ® s Uusineked l.iine.ii < Barley Malt. Oats 51 Otiions s‘> Dried Peaches tlnpeeled 30 “ peeled 40 Millet Seed 50 Orchard Orasa Seed 14 Herd's tjrmw Seed 14 lri-lt Potatoes 460 Sweet Potatoes. .. 50 Peas 00 Bye 56 Bltte GrastJ Seed 14 Clover Mted .... 00 Flax Seed 56 Hemp 'CM .........44 Tiroothjf Seed .....45 lluiigAriafl Seed ......48 Coarse Salt 50 Fine Salt 55 'iufefp* 65 V’heat 60 CoHou Seed... ...33 THE HAMILTON WEEKLY IMfOIL A Model Newspaper. THE SAVANNAH DAILY NEWS. The Savannah Daily Morning News iS acknowledged by the press aud people to ,be the best daily paper south of Louisville 'And east of New Orleans. Carry ing with it the pres tige and rc!iabi!ityr of age, it has all the Vigor and vitality of youth, and its enterprise as a gatherer of the la test and freshest news has astonished its contemporaries and met the warm approbation ttf the public. Ddiiilg the year 1873, no ex pense of time, labor, And money will be spent to keep the Morning NeWS ahead of all competitors in Georgia journalism, and to deserve the flatter ing encomiums heaped upon it from all quarters. There has, as ytet, beAki no serious attempt made to liVal tile telegrams which the NAWfc inaugura ted some years ago-, rtild the conse quence is, that the redder in search of the latest intelligence ill Way S looks to the Morning News. The tele graphic arrangements of the paper arb such that the omissions made by the general press reports are prompt ly and reliably supplied by its special correspondents. The Morning News has lately been enlarged to a thirty-six column pa per, and this bid ad scope Of type embraces, daily, everything of intei est that transpires in the domain of Literature, Art, Science, Politics, Re ligion, and general intelligence ; giv ing to the reader more and better di gested matter tliau any other paper in the State. It is, perhaps, needless to speak ijf tlie polities of the Morning News. For years and years—indeed, since its establishment— it lias been a leprsen tative Southern paper, and from that time to the present, in all conjunc tures, it has consistently and persis tently maintained Democratic States Rights principles, and labored, with an ardor and devotion that know no abatement, to promote and preserve the interests and the honor of the South. The special features of the Morn ing News will be retained and im proved upoll during the ensuing year, and several new attractions will be added. The Georgia news items, With their quaint and pleasant humor, and the epitome of Florida affairs, will be continued 'luring the year. The local department will be, as it has been for the past, year, the most complete and reliable to lie found iu any Savannah paper, and the commercial columns will be full and accurate. The price of the Daily is 610.00 per tin mini : 65.00 for six months ; 62 30 for three months; 61X0 lor one month. THIS Tttl-WEivKI.Y NHWS. This edition of the .doming Nfews is especially recommended to those who have not the facilities of a daily mail. Everything that, lias been said in the foregoing in regard to the daily edition may be I‘fipeated of the Tri=Weekly. It is made tip with great care, and contains the latest despatches and market reports. The price of this edition is 60 00 per annum, 6XOO for six months, 61.50 for three months. THE WEEKLY NEWS. The Weekly Morning News par ticularly recommends itself to the farmer and planter, and to those'who live off tho lines of railroad. It. is one of tho best family papers in the country, and its cheapness brings it wit hin the roach of all. It contains Thirty-six solid columns of reading matter, and is mailed so its to reach subscribers with the utmost prompt ness. It is a carefully and labori ously edited compendium of the news of the week, and contains, in addition, an infinite variety of other choice reading matter. Editorials on all topics, sketches of men, manners and fashions, tales, poetry, biography, pungent paragraphs and condensed telegrams cuter into its make-up. It contains the latest telegraphic dis patches and market, reports up to the hour of going to press, and is, in all respects, an indispetisiblo adjunct to every homo. Price —Ohe voaf, <l2 00; six months, 61.00; ‘three months, 50 cents. Subscriptions for citlier edition of the MoiJiilis' News umy be sent by express at the risk and expense of the proprietor. Address, J. 11. Estili., Savannah, Ga. Notice is hereby given that, from this date, the legal advertising of Harris county will be published in the Hamilton Visitok. B. 11. Williams Sheriff. ,1. if. (J. Williams. Ordinary. N. 11. Baiidkx, Clk. Sup. Ct. Hamilton, Ga., Jan. 2f), 1873. THE WEEKLY SUN. ONLY $1 4 YEAB. 8 PACES. The Best Family Paper; The Hist Agricultural Paper; The Best Political Paper; The Best Story Paper; The Best Fashion Heports; The Best Cattle Market Heports; The Best Paper Every Way. The Weekly New York Sim—B pages, 5G columns —$1 a year, or less than 2 cents a number. Scud your dollar. Address, The Si x, New York City. HAMILTON, HARRIS 00., GA., FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 21, 1871 fiPISSSSS IFISSJgS Of the niAn.y pens offered to the public, there are but few which liaV'A acquired the enviable reputation that Crider’s superior pens have justly merited. They have received the hearty commendation of every prominent penman Who has ever had an oppor- I tunity to give them a fair and impar tial trial. 1 They have a very fine, smooth point, aud are so constructed that they do not scratch like some line- pointed pens. Each small box borttains two dozen pens; each gross box contains six small boxes. Both the large and small boxes are rendered exceedingly convenient for opening and closing, when but one pen is wanted. In short, our pAns are gotten up in the very best style, combining every desirable qualiiy, and we challenge competition. We offer the following varieties, viz: Crid r's College I\:n. —This is a very neatj elastic and durable pen.— Per gross §1 50 ; box of 2 dozen, 30c. Crider's Normal Pen —This is a fine, firm pen—well adapted for gen eral use, correspondence, etc. Per gross, $1 25 ; box of two dozen, 25c. Crider's School Pen —This pen is coarser than cither of tho above, and. well adapted for schools. Per <o'oi<;v in gross boxes, 75c; pm gros.% snui" boxes, f1; box of .wo dozen,.2sc, Crider's Uusiness Pen —T'his is A large, firm pen. Price, per gross, in gross boxes only', st. ’ Any of the above pens sent by mail, prepaid, on receipt of price. Address Crider <fe Bro., Publishers and Book sellers, York, Pa. TRIED AND APPROVED! OHKSAIPJBSff iiSTZS) STERLING’S Snrhcrn Series ot School Books! 1, Sterling’s Southern Primer—in paper covers, 42 pages, per dozen, 90 cents; in boards, 48 pages, 6] 08. 2, Sterling’s Southern 1 Tutorial Primer, profusely illastralcd with ! now and handsome wood cuts, and I adapted as well for a gift as a school book, with elegant illuminated cover —l2 mo, 00 pages, per dozen, 62 40. 3, Sterling s Southern Elementary Spelling Book, pp. 128, per dozen 6i. 4, Sterling’s Southern First Read er, 101 pages, 25 cents each. 5, Sterling’s Southern Second Rea der, 210 pages, 50 cents each. G, Sterling’s Southern Third Rea der, 240 pages, 60 cents each. 7, Sterling’s Southern Fourth Rea der, 312 pagfeSj 90 cents each.. B, SI fling’s Sotttln rn Fif.h Eead- I er. 456 pages, $1 25 each. 9, Sterling’s Southern Little Ora j lor, 142 pages, GO cents each. ! 10, Sterling’s Southern Orator; 544 pages, f I So each. | Sterling’s Sottiliel'h Copy Books— ’ nine numbers—per and. zeu $1 50. Published by J. \Y. Burke & Cos., j Macon, Ga. jan3l Wmi’knx . Tilrs truly Valuable Medicine has won its wv? iilto every household in the nation, anti is cone* demiy recommended for the cure of DYSPEPSIA, CONSTIPATION, • : ANI) EVERY FORM OF INDIGESTION, CHILLS, FEVERS, and all diseases arising from Torpid T.ltfcf/ For CONSUMPTION mid CHBCNIC COUGHS, <**• TAPES, SBONCHITI3, and D23ILITY from any dis eases, it is h safe, agreeable, and reliable tonic. 11l al‘ Kidney and Bladder troubles it will be found beneficial. The purest and best Bourbon Whisky ir com* blued with materials iu this article which Mm the MOST EFFECTIVE TONIC KNOWN. . ALSO HOLLAND SCHNAPPS, AN INVIGORATING CORDIAL Tin: BEST bItUETIC KNOWN. W- H. WALKER Sd CO., Wholesale Wine and Litfttor Dealers, Genera! Wholesale Agents, *Jf> Main street, between First and Second, Ixmisville, Kentucky. I!. W. DUKES, mMA'M) ©ah© m, BAR AND RESTAURANT, Corner of Gilmer and Btindoljih Sited*, WEST POINT, OA. • O' Also a fn>t tl. s l ftiber *liop and good j ii’g hkli.S K iiMfUd witti lle I.Ct:te My friend* in linni* county ale in vittd to give cue ft tali wh n ilid) v*il Wot Point. Hinee Doaier, ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, WAVERLY HALT., GEORGIA Special attention will be given to all busi ness plated in my hanilt. liu2 ly GEORGIA, Harm* County. C J Cash has applied fur exemption of personalty, and setting apart and valuation of homestead, t.nd I will para upon the name on the 20th day of Janiiaiy, 1813, at my oflica. J F C W ILLIa MS, Oidlnary Written far the Visitor. A WIFE’S EXPERIMENT, hV sibiLl. Dear little Dingleton! What a lively remembrance I have of your unpretending cottages and muddy sidewalks—of the wavy line of blue mountains looming nii&til.y ttt the Norih, and the sky above looking, as Thackeray expresses it, “as if it did not know whether to laugh or cry, so lull is it o$ clouds and sun shine”—of your inquisitive old maids and Cupid-forsaken old bachelors— of barefoot children—ot simpering miSises—of tea-parties, compared with which the honors of'Ylw Inquisition were a Paradise ; where, to have pro posed cards, Would have brought down tile Aottiblubd indignation of the whole company upon one’s devo ted head, or to have insinuated that a quadrille or so would enliven the occasion, Wbuld have cxconiifiithiAA ted one from the society of those “ unco good.” Ah! Robert Burns, how I have sometimes longed for thy caustic pen, when I have secH such straining for gnats —such unhesitating swallowing of camels! But what I was going to say about Dingleton was, thAt one of tilb fe\v pretty cottages of the village belonged to Mr. John Smith, It was a neat little domicil, illustrating what the English are pleased to style, our American taste, with the whitest tft walls and greenest of blinds. The iuuentlo of our trans-Atlantic friends to die coni*ary notwithstanding, this little cottage, eo like an exaggerated cotton boll with its vWant surround ings, certainly looked very cool and inviting. Mr. and Mrs, John Smith were very nice people, so all the “ folks ” of Dingleton said; and if one’s neighbors don’t know till abdtlt one,who should 1? To be sure, Ma y Jones did say that Mr. Smnh got into awful tempers, and tore tip tilings in a wav dreadful to relate, when, like Mrs. Gummidge, bo was under the influence of die “ old nil.” But then, on the othdr hand, evtrybody knew that Mary Jones expcssCd "herself romantically, afid wits mJver so well j‘leased as when retailing some bit of gossi]) or scandal, as t’te case might be. What if site did sew for Mrs. Smith, mid Mn Smith, and all the lilde Smiths, Bob, Jane and tlie hftby, in die lilde ri oin off Mrs. Smith’s bedroom, which that lady spoke of as her “ botuloir” to people who did not knoiV ilutt it performed tiiple duly as dress'ug-roort), sitting-room and nuisci'y, But then it is not al ways necessary to be mo: c explicit than the occasion demands; while we arc enjoined to tell the truth, and nothing but the t'udi, we are not ob liged to tell the whole iruth. For tny part, 1 ilrnk Mrs. Smith’s economy of the Queen’s English quite proper, though theft! \\'t! r o some prejudiced and evil-disposed persons who called it pul.ing on airs. Well, in the boudoir Alary Jones did the sowing; thereby having the best opportunities to improve each shining hoar in tho way of informing herself of all the little private affai; s of the family. I don’t mean to insitt uate that Mary wag ever guilty of ap plying her car to the keyhole, if Mrs. Snath did find her (Mary’s) thirnblc and scissors suspiciously near the comuctiug door, when she entered une .peciedly her boudoir, after one of those maUimonial tornadoes; nor if Title Jane, dear child, did scream oiti, “Ou ’top on my doll ’cd, won on y utt so fas’—b-o o-lt; ” and I hope that Mary ’s explanation of being in chase of a stray spoolj was according to Alts. Opic; her subsequent ner vousness was doubtless attributable to the prolonged howls of the be reaved Jane. But when Alary rela ted Alt. Siniill’s shortcomings to tlie \ i.ehiog cars of tho Dingletoniaiis, and it transpired, in the course of her list ration, that she had heard him say to liis wife, that “ Mary Jones was a long-tongued, mischief-making old maid,” her listeners looked at each Oilier, and WOflde.ed how slie heard it—Mr. Smith being known to them as a Chesterfield in a small way : so, while they gave him credit for mort triuh than politeness in this instance, ond ihougli they dil not reject the pros of this strange s.ory, they kept, like Alexander, one ear for the cons. But Alary had not wandered so far from tho truth as some of tier kind friends were inclined to think. Air. Smith, the most affable of gentlemen away from home, or in tlie society of other people, seemed to think, like many other Air. Smith-*, that hone was the place to let off the accumu lated spleen of the day, whether en gendered by' outside trouble or do mestic shortcomings—not by any per sonal abuse of his patient wife, but by an insane wroakiilg of his venge ance upon such harmless objects as might huifle in his way; and many a mirror, which would otherwise have existed to a ripe old age, was carried to the jjattret tVlth many curioilS re flections, and there, with disabled chairs and dilapidated tables, passed the remainder of its wretched exist ence in showing up, in a distorted and spiteful way, the imperfections of its associates, just as it had once delighted to reveal their fair propor tions. But let us return to our “muttoh,” which, in this case, is Mr. Smith. Ono morning, after one of these domestic storms, when Mr. Smith had betaken himself to his flourishing store, situated on the one street of which Dingtotbii could boast, and was there Measuring calico and weigh ing sugar in his blandest manner, a small female figure walks, with an energy' which y r on sec at once is hab itual, up to tho front door of that gentleman’s residence, and enters sans ceremonie. This is mama-in-law Brown. Alas! unhappy Smith. Look to your sceptre when this formidable personage discovers your numerous misdemeanors. Down the hall she goes, and without even the prelimi nary knock, opetYk the door of her daughter's bedroom. This daughter she sees seated de jectedly before the fire, feet Upm the fender, handkerchief lb eyes, her morning wrapper still oil, although the bauds of the little clock on the mant hi point warniiigly to 11 a. m , which, in the benighted region of Dingleton, meant nearly dinner-time. “ Why, Caroline, wliat bqs hap pened ? ” Halts mama in astonishment. “Oh ! Mania,” dries Mrs. Smith; and hursts into tears; then -struggles for composure. “What is the niattev?” asks Mrs. Drown again. “Oh! Mama —Mr. Smith*** “What about Air. Smith? lie is not dead or sick, for 1 saw him go to his stoic this morning.” “Oh no; not that; but—but ” and the handkerchief is brought into fresh requisition. “Come, Gii|;clino,” says mama sc verely. her brows; “ no more ifs, and and*, and bins; tell meat once ttlfu 1# the matter.” Atnl this energetic and unsympathizing woman scats herself iu a low, comfortable rocker, and draws from its receptacle the ever-read) 1 fctilttjhg. Thus adjured, Mrs. Siiiith begins, first giving a grant g!p, “ Mr. Smith—Mr. Smith behaves just like a bear.” “Why, Onroliliei Ain Smith is the most affable gentleman iu Diu gletnn. Everybody says that.” "I kn-iw they do,” returns Airs. Smith, finding words enough as her anger rises. “And no lie is, away from home, or where any one can see him. But when wo aio alone, and anything displeases him, lie acts jusE like a madman—breaks chairs j throws shots about, or anything else that comes to hand. You would not be lieve how he goes on, unless you were to see him. lie acts tike a Co-r inanoho.” Mrs. Smith’s idea of a Comanche being that of a very suVflge person, who flomishes toinal awks or any other murderous weapon over his head, while lie dances wildly about. Mama Brown suspends the impor tant manufacture of soaks in her as tonishment. lt Are jou very sure, Caroline, that you arc not exaggerating Mr. Smith’s acts?” she asks. 44 Exaggerate indeed ! ” exclaims her daughter Indignantly. 44 1 think it very unkind of you, Alaina, to ask such n question, when I have kept his Mi am etii I conduct a profound secret for ye. r, and endured it with the patience of a mwrtyf. Exaggerate! 1 only w isli you could see him.” 44 Do von provoke him ?” “No, indeed; I never say a word. Why, ALium, you do not know how many fibs I have told to shield him, I said 4 somebody ’ broke the parlor mirror, and had all the servants up, p’-etending to believe one of them did it, w hen 1 knew he broke it him self, because he could not tie his cra vat to suit him. And that beautiful cup you gave him as a Christmas gift last year; beause his coffee did not suit him, he Uir.-w it upon the floor, and I told you it was broke.n acci dentally. Oh dear! I could tell you hundieds of thiflgs like th it, and hundreds of fibs to correspond, which I told to keep servants from talking. But lam tired of it how'. .TdsY See wliat ho did this morning ;** and she held up the ruins of a watch. “ 1 asked him to set this watch with his, so as to be exact about bis dinner time, and because he wound it too tight and broke the spring, he threw it with all his might on the hearth;” and this much tried woman looked ruefully at the mass of broken glass and battered gold in her hand. She was too angry to remain silent lohft my\ as Mama BrtWs> fc&l Will ing, only keeping up a vigorous rock ing of the low chair, and a nervous “ click, click, ’ of the needles, she re sumed : “ Why, Mama, only think. Last Week lie was in the parlor, and, fur some trifle, I do not remember wliat, he flew into one of his tantrums, sAISed a cliiiir and dashed it to the floor, threw my beautiful copy of Byron out of tho window, and there is no telling to wlmt lengths he would have gone, if, in Lite midst of this pleasant occupation, Mrs. Green and Mrs. Stanford had not. coine in. Just as soon as lie saw them, with his most gracious manner he invited them into the parlor, ‘ Dear little Bob,’ he said, “ will have his ptliy, lilkl \Vt5 fidn’t al ways keep him ouN f the prtrlor.* I wits So allgry I could not see straight, and how I did long to box his cars!” “I'm afraid, my dear,” says Mania Brown, “ Mr. Smith’s mother did not give him his due amount of spankin'', so you must take him in hand now.’*^ “ Gracious knows, I would spank him quick enough if I could,” says injllred Ales: Bini Mi. “ Yqti can’t spank him, my dear, I but you must put him under disci ! pline. have nerve enough, if )ou try, and I airi going to tell you how to conquer him.” And so, after a half-liour’s confi dential tetedi-tettt the ladies sepfUtttU, ttiftl Mrs. Smith’s face wears, fertile rest of the day, ai look of amused ex pectation. She had not many hours to wait before her lord and master gave her an opportunity to pllt lilattia Hrowit’s advice into practice. The next morning Air. Smith walks into breakfast, his collar White fis a snowdrift, and smoothly turned over the neatest of neckties, his shirt front With every Imttofi in its place, as white and smooth ns the collar, his whole personnel, from collar to pret tily embroidered slippers, bespeaking the c&feflil BiipefinltUdbnbfe Wife. A nice RfdatfaME sriiokos on the table, aIL unexceptionable, from the amber coffee to the nicely-broiled chicken— the golden butter delicious muffins, and cakes browned tU a tlfrn, telling of a skilful housekeeper ns well as wife. But these propitiatory offer ings were not destined Iff ilct'ohipllsh the end whereunto they were sent, for Air. Smith had, on entering the foom, strifes his pet corn against Bob’s hobby-horse, which sent an agonizing tremor through the lifffb, and lie now took his Abut With a deep scowl upon his comely features, mumbles out a grace utter this style: 4 4 Lordmukciisthankfulforwhutwenre ilbotlltoieeciveanieu,” aifd then pro ceeds to sip the coffee which his wife hastens to hand him, duly sweetened and Crbamed. “Whitt kind of coffee is this, Mrs. Smith ? ” lie asks. “Java.” “You must be mistaken—-it is Rio.” “I know it is Java,” persists bis wife, “for I gave it to Dinah Ut pwrt'bj myself.” “Well, Java or Rio, it is not fit for slops,’’ and this lord of creation pushes the cup from him in disgust. His wife looks down and becomes very much interested in the cups be fore her —she kuows that a storm is brewing. “This chicken is burnt up,” lie says presently, proceeding to curve it, how ever. “Airs. Smith, ymt mu very negligent of your duties; you ktp/W i particular)/ detest burnt chioLiu' Ji' *•1 know you particularly dt-iest anything that happens to come in your way when you are crosu,” rtf torts his wife with asperity. “ Madam! ” thunders her husband, scarcely believing the evidence of his ears. “I know who I am talking to,” fl iys Mrs. Smith, answering the words impliod, instead of uttered. “ 1 have been s mean-spirited creature to bear your ill-humor as 1 have done all these years, and 1 don’t mean to stand $2 A YfiAl it any longer. Jilst because you are vexed this morning, yon, accuse ine of neglect of duty—find f;h\U with the coffee, which is clear and stroiig; say the chicken is burnt, when I broiled it nvyselfi for fear Dinah would not Cook it properly -and UiS tt Ukl thanks I get for my trouble.” “ Madam! ’’ again thunders Mfc Smi’.li, who, between anger and asi tonishment, can find no other form of expression. “You nidy‘Madam’ as much aS you please,” says the wife, with flash ing eyes and contracted brow, though the corners of her mouth twitched at if with suppressed laughter, “but I wish you to understand cHstinotlyi that from this day forward t SMI not tolerate your tempers.” Dinah now appears at the door with a plate of cakes,“ hot and hot*” tfritlpii she bunds to the irate head of the house. He seizes the plate and sends it sailing across the room against t&A opposite walk This is the commencement of active hostilities, for which Mrsi Smith has waited. p “As the coffee is not fit for slops, I will not fnree you to drink it,” site says, seizing the coffee-pot and sAiid* ing it after the cakes; then the cups follow—the sugar-dish, cream-pitcher —everything, in fact, within range of her hand. “ Brass do Lor’, Mis’ Oa’linoffwiije crazy for shore,” says Poor DulstH; rolling up her eyos until the whites alone are visible, as she dodges, firsl on one side then on the other, to esa capo the flying crockery. “Caroline!” cries Mr Smith, who begins, with D : nah, to eiitertahi doubts as to his wife’s sanity. “ Oar' oline, my dear! ” But “ Caroline, my dear)’* is not td be pacified by endearing flames. SliA seizes (his plate, that cup, dishes; knives and forks, and hurls them with such impetus against the wall And floor, that not a whole one is It-it td tell tho tale, Tlieli silo catches up the chicken. “As this is burnt up, it is only fib for Carlo. Here, Csiflo ’’- and tint chicken, iu company with the mut* fins, go to form Carlo’s breakfast; 44 {Stop, for Hcaveli’s fiiike!” criesj Air. Smith, who sees his breakfast vanishing literally in thin air, ns InJ makes a dive more noticeable for Ce lerity than grace, just iu time to pre* vcilt a collision between his head and the ten-tray. 44 Caroline, my dear/ tJalni yourself.’’ llaVing no rndrb Worlds to conquer in the crockery line, Caroline calm# herself. Mr. Smith look# dt his, watch. lie has just fr e mintiitfS grace in which to reach his store to lultil an appointment of importance. “ Where is Dinah?’’ he IlgkS; it# his thoughts turn towards something with which to sustain the inner mart during the coming hungry hours: but that individual, firmly impressed with tho conviction that her injstrtfsß w# “gwine crazy,’’ had betaken itersell to parts unknown, and did not emergd from her hiding-place until long spied Air, Smith had departed, ,4 a saddeif and a wiser man.’4 “ Diltali,” said her iriist rrtS#; ## that person cautiously peered her face iri at the door to take a survey of thd battle-ground, “clear away this rtib hisli, and say nothing about it to any one. lam not crazyi” , Thus assured, Dinah coines in. 44 De Lor’ Ability knows, Mis’ Ca’l iuc, I tort sumbody dun kunjur yoni If you ain’t crazy, wai for yott dot dis? ” and rho begins tt) pick up thd Woken pieces, 44 1 wished to teach Mr. Smith t lesson,” Mrs .Smith replies. She succeeded. And Dinah, witli tlie characteristic reticence of her class, imparted the full partiul#fß id half a dojfctt of her friends before set, and that is lioW 1 came to kuow 1 anything about it, A Quaker PilnterN Proverbs* N ever sendest tlttiff 3H flf tlcle fof publication without giving tho editor thy name, for thy name oftentimes secures publication to worthless. artv cleft. l’hou shouldst not rap at the door of a pi biting office, for he that an-’ Bwercd the rap sh'Cbreth in his own sleeves ami loselh time. Never do thou loaf about, and ask questions or knock down type, or the boys will love you liko they do shade trees—when thou leattrtft. Tliofl shouldst never read the copy 6fi the prime.’s case, or on the sharp liooked container thereof/ or he may knock ibee. down. • Never inquire thou of the editor for the news/ for behold it is hie biiS'iiees at the appointed time to trive it to thee without asking. It f i mu right lha’ thou shouldst ask him who is U:o author of articles, lor it is his duty to keep such things unto When fhon dost enter bis office, take heed unto thyself that thou dost ii. >t look at what may be lying open and coiicernclh thee not, for tnip is not meet iu the sight of good breed-* ing, , Neither examine tboti the proof sheet, for it is not ready to meet thine eye that thou mayest under-' s', and. Prefer thine own town paper to any other, and subsoribo for it iinmc dnitel). - . Pay for it m advance and it shall be well with thee and thine. Don’t l|| to subscribe for Elm Visitob whew you come to tow%