Weekly Gwinnett herald. (Lawrenceville, Ga.) 1871-1885, June 05, 1872, Image 1
ItfINNETT HERALD.
I 'gCD *«RT WEDNESDAY, BY
IkPLES & YARBROUGH,
f ..'n M . rEEPLES, Editor.
IvtFS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
lATbl ATb «* r S 2 00
Pjjp.JJ rates an- cash-payable
»S°U P subscribers, and
W°< will receive a copy free.
wishing their papers
B'w «7ne post-office to another,
tifjname of the post-office
Mil l they wish it changed, as well
I-kbtisements.
levy W
3 , per square. ,; 5 00
tration.. - - 300
and creditors... 500
l uare 4 22
lon -y; 9 nn
° mestead o 22
land, by administrators,
rdians, are required by
the first Tuesday in the
he hours of ten in the
ee in the afternoon, at
i the county in which
uated. .
sales must be given in
10 days previous to the
>rs and creditors of an
; published 4(1 days,
ale of personal proper
n like manner, 10 days
>y- , ,
plication will be made
Ordinary for leave to
mblished for four weeks,
tters of administration,
must be published 30
an from administration,
lonths; for dismission
, 40 days.
reclosure of mortgages
monthly, four mouths ;
>st papers, for the full
ontlis; for compelling
tors or administrators,
been given by the de
ice of three months,
must be published for
two weeks.
11 always be continued
, the legal requirements,
rdered.
————
3NAL CARDS.
WM. E. SIMMONS.
SIMMONS.
EYS AT LAW,
, Georgia.
innett and the adjoining
inar 10-ly
PITCH INS,
EY AT LAW,
Ga.
Ie in the counties nf the Western
id iu Milton and Forsyth of the
to- mar 15-ly
ill M. PEEPLES,
rOBXEY AT LAW,
SEVILLE, r,A.
es iu the counties of Gwinnett,
bon and Milton.
j claims pruuiptiy attended to
r6m
■ N. GLE N N ,
jfciN’EY AT LAW,
ga.
attend to all business
care, and also to Land,
ension claims mar 15-Gm
|W K - & G A. MITCHELL,
MmCEYILLE, GA,
a continuation nf
services to the citizens
I LOe P constantly on hand a
ent of drugs and chemicals.
IDS carefully prepared.
af fer3eis7
,N AND surgeon,
*ENCEVILLE, GA.
6m
• Roberts,
10RKE * AT Law,
IRETTA » GEORGIA,
Me. of lht e ,T, Cuit - rdso
H , 1111 a| id Gwinnett of
"iS' 7 k 11 Waller
W«rranl» and
J " lH United States
jmie 14-bm
: house,
Shed,
W U NT*, ga .
KT ’' ' Proprietor.
V’ * 50 Cents.
■V
B' i * s| °N hotel
S. C . .
R-Jackson.
Weekly Gwinnett Herald.
T. M. PEEPLES, PROPRIETOR.]
Vol. 11.
Ye Editors Perplexities.
An editor ife \fr. Sqtiibbs,
A man cf t#rdly will;
A mighty map likewise to wield
Ye scissqrs and ye quill.
Ye humble honors of ye press
W ith lofty pride be wears ;
Although no millionaire, he hath
Well nigh a million airs.
He strives with dignity to feed
Ye little Squibbs with bread,
And eke upon ye wings of fame
Ye name of Sqnibbs to spread.
He takes his little perquisites—
Ye which each Press man knows—
With ready, gracious air,
For which he "puffs” bestows.
Now, Mr. Squibbs he had a pass
Upon ye railroad train ;
Ye which was stolen; ye loss of which
It vexed him sore with pain.
Then with a frown of dignity
Squibbs sought ye President;
“Give orders to your hirelings straight,
Through all your road's extent,
To seize the man, wherever found,
Who to my name aspires.”
Ye orders flew, and Mr. Squibbs
With dignity retires.
Not many days thereafter, Squibbs,
With dignity arose,
And clad his dignity and limbs
All in his Sunday clothes ;
For Squibbs was bid to scenes of mirth
All in ye distant town,
And merrily he cut his pen
To note ye doings down,
And while he viewed his toilette o'er,
All by a luckless chance,
He hit upon ye stolen pass,
“Sale in his Sunday pants.”
With lofty air Squibbs gave ye pass
Unto ye ticket man ;
“Eureka! ” muttered he, and turned
Ye face of Sqnibbs to scan.
Then, with a flaming lantern, sore,
He smote Squibbs on ye head ;
Three bloody brakemen, then he called,
Who bore him out as dead.
Upon ye lordly Squibbs then sat
Three brakemen, great and small,
Ye while the wrathful ticket man
His clothes did averliaul.
They found a pass on every road
That runs ye world around ;
They bound him last, and swore they lmd
Ye king or pass-thieves found.
His freedom was at last restored ;
II is dignity, alas,
IV as wrecked, and even to this day
/ Squibbs won’t ride on a pass.
The Selma (Ala.) Times counsels
■ the Democracy to make no nomi
nation in opposition to Horace
Greeley. It says: “Greeley, the
uncompromising opponent to De
mocracy for a life time, is now the
hope of the Democratic party, in
preventing the coriupt and imbe
cile administration of Grant for
another term. We believe that
we utter the sentiments of nine
tenths of the white people, the
tax payers of this section, when
we say that we hope that the Na
tional Executive Committee of the
Democratic party which will meet
to-morrow, will decide that it is to
the interest of the people of the
entire Union, bnt more especially
to the people of the South, not to
hold a National convention ; or if
a convention is held, that it be
merely to keep up the organization
of the party, and to hold the ‘bal
ante of power/ to be thrown into
the scales at tire time and place
where most can be accomplished.”
mm ♦♦♦ ——
Pot Agreements in Writing.—
How many misunderstandings arise
from the loose way in which business
matters are talked over, and then
when each party puts his own con
struction on the conversation, the
matter is diminished by each with
the words “all right,” “all right.”—
Frequently it turns out all wrong and
becomes a question for lawyers and
the courts.
More than three-fourths the litiga
tion of the country would be saved
if the people would put down their
names to it. Each word in our
language has its own peculiar mean
ing, and memory may by the change
of a single word, or even by the
change of its position in a sentence,
convey an entirely different idea from
that intended. When once reduced
to writing, ideas are fixed, and the
expensive law-suits avoided.
Two mischievous children, each
about eight years old, were recently
placed on trial, in England, on the
charge of placing pieces of iron on a
lailroad. It must have been a curi
ous spectacle, the Judge sitting in
state, arrayed in a formidable wig
and robes trimmed with ermine, and
surrounded with all the solemn
pomp of an English court, with the
jury empannelled, and learned coun
sel elaborately arguing points of
law, while the heads of the two des
perate culprits were hardly visible
above the dock.
Lawrenceville, Ga., Wednesday, June 5, 1872.
A NOTABLE I>UEL.
Gratz Brown and Gov. Itey
nolds, of Missouri.
Since Gratz Brown has been
brought prominently before the
country as the Liberal candidate
for Vice-President, on the ticket
with Horace Greeley, the following
account of a duel fought between
him and Gov. Reynolds, of Mis
souri, some fifteen or sixteen years
ago will be read with interest. It
was the last political duel fought
iu Missouri:
The duel was fought iu 185 G, on
au island in the Mississippi, some
forty or fifty miles below fc>t. Louis.
The principles were at the time
young, earnest and able politicians
—men of intelligence, highly edu
cated and full of ambition. Brown,
a Kentuckian, was editor of the
Democrat, which was at that time
the organ of the Benton Democrats
and controlled by him ; and Frank
Blair, then as now, his close and
intimate friend, Reynolds, a Vir
ginia, bad, after completing his
studies in Germany, acted for a
while as secretary ot legation and
charge d’affairs at Madrid. He
had removed to St. Louis some four
years before, and was practicing
law.
In 1856 the quarrel between the
Benton Democrats and ihe anti-
Benton Democrats, the pro-slavery
and the anti-slavery men, had be
come extremely bitter, and was
made the more violent by the fact
that iu that year the Gubernatorial,
Presidential and Congressional
elections were all to be held. Col.
Benton had, after a tremendous
struggle, been left out of the Sen
ate,in which he had for thirty years
represented Missouri with distin
guished ability and unswerving
fidelity. From this action of the
Legislature he appealed to the
people by becoming a candidate
for Governor.
The anti-Benton Democrats nom
inated against him theii ablest and
most popular leader, Trusten
Polk, while the Whigs and Know
Nothings nominated Ewing. In
St. Louis the Benton men nomina
ted Frank P. Blair for Congret s.
The Whigs and Know Nothings
nominated the then incumbent,
Luther K. Kenneth The anti
Benton men nominated Thomas C.
Reynolds. All of them were ‘fight
ing men,’ and gentlemen of the
highest character.
The nominations were made in
May; the election was to be held
iu August. The canvass was con
ducted by all parties with the ut
most spirit and with great bitter
ness, the expression of which was,
however, generally kept within
the bounds of gentlemanly pro
priety; for in those days a candi
date for these high offices in Mis
souri never forgot, not let others
forget, that lie was a gentleman.
The Congressional District was
thoroughly canvassed by Blair
and Reynolds, who discussed the
issue of the canvass in presence
of the people, as was then the
good custom. Each was aided by
his friends, of whom Blair had a
powerful one in the editor of the
Democrat.
One day an article appeared in
that paper containing what Rey
nolds conceived to be an offensive
allusion to himself. He replied
through the Leader in a brief but |
bitter note. A challenge was sent'
and accepted.
Brown’s seconds were two well
known gentlemen, since dead—
Otd. Mitchell and Mr. Walker,—
These advised with 001. Benton,
Frank P. Blair, and other leading
men of their party, for it was a
public and party matter.
Reynolds’ seconds were Colonel
Ferdinand Ken nett and Captain
Hudson, both of whom have since
died. Their advisers were Col.
David 11. Armstrong, the present
Chairman of the Democratic State
Committee, and author of the Pas
sive or Missouri Policy, and Col.
Linn, then Collector of the Port.
The terms were agreed upon,
and the parties went with their
friends to an island in the Missis
sippi, fortj miles below St. Louis.
Both were men of unquestioned
courage and excellent shots,—
Brown was a bachelor. Reynolds
had a wife as brave as himself.
Kennett and Mitchell, old and de
voted friends, though then acting
for mortal adversaries, teased a
half dollar for choice of position.
Kennett won. They then tossed
for the word. Again Kennett won,
and Reynolds seemed to be in
luck.
“ COMING EVENTS CAST THEIR SHADOWS BEFORE!"
| We now quote from a recent
account of the affair i
The choice of position was nA
of much advantage, however, as
the Btin was too low to affect
either. The word remained with
Kcnnett, and he was to call out,
“Fire—One—Two—Three—Stop.”
The principals were not to lower
their pistols before the word fire,
and not to shoot after the word
' stop.
Kennett and Mitchell measured
the ground carefully. Each turned
after he had finished and threw a
keen glance along the tavvney
track, and then looked one into
the eyes of the other. They did
not speak audibly, yet both said
iu their heaOs—“lt is close.”
And it was. Too close for two
such men, who had oply between
them the unpleasant memories of
a political quarrel.
They were placed face to face—
Brown looked straight at his ad
versary a pleasant half smile on
his lip. Not a muscle quivered.
He stood as if carved from the
sand, immovable and yet full of
bountiful life. Reynolds’ attitude
was none the leas superb. The
Kentuckian and the Virginian
were to fight as their ancestors
had fought before them for a hun
dred years. They recognized the
'code, and it was well. By the
code they would be judged fairly,
standing or falling.
The pistols were brought and
loaded carefully. A grain of pow
der, more or less, might sacrifice
a life. They were ugly looking
weapons, to say the least of them,
and of English make. On each
barrel was the word “London” en
graved. The stocks were of ma
hogany, and of the saw-handle
shape. They had hair-triggers,
double sights, were smoothe bores,
and carried each an ouiicu ball.
The barrels were iTull six inches
long, and were dark looking and
ominous.
It was now between six and sev
en o’clock. The negro oarsmen
looked on in sober wonderment.
The surgeons arranged their instru
ments and bandages. The respec
live friends of each principal took
their positions, and when every
thing was ready, Kennett called
out iu a clear and distinct voice,
“Gentlemen, are you ready V”
So nearly together as to sound
as one voice, both Brown and Rey
nolds answered, “Ready,”
Kennett then cried out, "Fire.”
Betore the word one was heard
Reynolds lowered his pistol and
fired. Brown fired almost simul
taneously with his adversary.—
Indeed the two reports were blend
ed so nearly as to be indistinguish
able, and the secouds looked from
one to the other to see if either
was hit. Reynolds stood perfectly
still with his smoking pistol in his
hand, while Brown shifted his
weight from one leg to the other,
as if suffering pain.
Hudson walked up to Reynolds
and said to him, “I fear Brown is
wounded in the groiu.” Reynolds
replied, “You must be mistaken,
for I aimed at his knee.”
Hudson then went near to
Brown, returning in a short time
to his principal, remarking, “You
are right, he is shot in the knee.”
“I was ceitain of it,” replied Rey
nolds, “the wound will not be dan
gerous."
Brown’ll friends in the mean
while had approached lmu and led
him to oue side, while the surgeons
examined his wound. He was as
cool as grenadier. Although suf
fering extreme pain aud scarcely
able to stand, he Bternly deman
ded another fire, insisting on his
ability to remain upon the field.
The surgeon overruled his wish
es and immediately a conference
took place betweeu all the friends
of each, which was communicated
to the principals, and Reynolds
instantly advanced to where
Brown was lying—the pain of the
wound haviug forced him finally
to the ground—and offered his
hand in a frank aud friendly man
ner. Brown received it in the
same spirit, and they had some
plyasaut conversation together.
Mutual exprcssionxof esteem were
exchanged, aud the mutual with
drawal of everything offensive
that had taken place between
them.
Just at tliat time the steamer
Editor from Memphis, heavily
loaded and crowded with passen
gers, came in sight down theriver.
She was at once halted and stop
ped to take the party on hoard.
Brown had to be removed in a
blanket, <he ball having split the
knee on the right log just upon
the edge of the joint, causing pro
fuse hemorrhage find intense pain.
A state room was placed at once
at his disposal and he received the
m6st generous attention from all.
Reynolds went to his native
State in the late war and was for
two years the Confederate Gov
ernor of Missouri. He is now
practicing law in St, Louis, and
he and his old antagonist ate po
litically and socially friends.—
Brown was elected to the United
States Senate, and last year was
made Governor of Missouri by the
united votes of the Democrats
and Liberal Republicans t
From the Meridian Gazette.
A Bate for Matrimony,
an eixwino corn.* pursued by am
IRATE FATHER—A IIAII.HOAD TRAIN
TO THE RESCUE —RUNAWAYS
TRIUMPHANT.
As the northern bound train on
the Alabama and Chattanooga
railroad moved up to Brandi n sta
tion, in Georgia, a few days since,
it was observed by the passengers
and trainmen that something very
unnatial had occurred at that sta
tion. Inquiry from persons stand
ing in the excited crowd at the
depot, soon elicited the informa
tion that a youthtul couple, flee
ing from the cruel opposition of a
stern parent to the accomplish
ment of matrimonial union, had a
moment before galloped to the sta
tion with the intention of taking
the cars for some point beyond
pursuit; but that the cruel parent
of the blushing lass had followed
so close upon them that they had
put spurs for the next station,
closely followed by the vengeful
sire. No sooner were these facts
taken iu by the conductor of the
train than he communicated to the
engineer with orders to "pull her
wide open” and attend the race.
Now the country road, on which
the actors in this little drama had
suddenly departed, runs the whole
distance between Brandon and
the next station, right along side
of the railroad track; no that a
fine opportunity was afforded of
observing the race. About a mile
out of Brandon the rapidly moving
train came in full sight of the
ptirsoit, and in a few minutes was
neck ami neck with them. By this
time all the people of the train
had leen apprized of the status of
affairs and every soul had freely
entered into the contest. Ihe plat
forms and windows were crowded
with anxious and excited faces
and the gaze of all was soon riv
eted upon the old man. Mounted
upon a large and powerful horse,
his coat tail flying in the breeze,
stern vengeance setting solemn
on his angry countenance, the old
man applied whip and spur to his
charger and the speed he seemed
to be making argued ill for the
Seeing youngsters. lie deigned
for one instant to turn his head
away from the road before him,
but was deaf to the shouts hurled
at him from the train.
The sympathies of the passen
gers were universally in favor of
the young couple, and the engin
eer crowding on all steam, soon
swept out of sight of the lather
in pursuit of the object of his ven
geance. About a half mile further
on the elopers were overtaken.
Mounted on horseback they too
were crowding all sail. The girl’s
dishevelled tresses streamed
straight in the breeze, and the
hatless youth, with a curious
mixture of love and apprehen-
sion on his countenance, spurred
forward his own beast and bela
bored that of hid companion with
a frazzled limb, ever and anon
casting an anxious glance to the
rear. It was evident that their
horses were blown. With their
straightened necks and pauting
sides they promised every moment
to succumb. At this moment the
excitement on the train knew no
bounds—handkerchiefs were wav
ed, ladies screamed, men shouted
and the whistle blew. A few hun
dred yards more and the raec
seemed about to terminate in die
aster to tl>e youthful pair.
The jaded horses, »o longer
obeying the whip and spar, slack
ed their speed. In the distance—
scarcely half a mile away, a cloud
of dust, rapidly approaching,
struck terror to the fleeing daugh
ter, who, clinging to the pummel
of her saddle, seemed paralyzed
with terror. The young man
seemed uncertaiu what to do. He
looked about him as one about to
abandon the unequal contest iu
[*2 A YEAR, IN ADVANCE.
despair. At this point the excite
ment on the train reached its
height. Men shouted, “Go ahead,
iho old man is close behind.”
“Never give it up so.” “Hurrah!”
while the mail agents, waiving a
mail bag in his hand halloed, “Stick
to it—never say die.” But this
encouragement was lost on the
jaded steeds; slower and slower
and slower became their | ace
and nearer came the now visible
parent. At this moment the suc
cess of the pursuit seemed certain.
•Suddenly a voice yelled, “St"p the
train, for God’s sake, and take
them aboard." Immediately the
breaks were put down and the
train brought to a halt.
Out rushed trainmen and pas
sengers, some seized the fainting
damsel and tumbled her in the
train, others assisted the youth
aboard, and others slung iu their
carpetsack and saddlebags,
Scarcely was this accomplished
when the old man, furious with
passion, dashed up to the scene
and cr etf, "SHop, stop, or I'll kill
you,” But he Was too late. Toot,
toot, Went the engine, quicjtly
answered the driving wheels, and
the train moved off just a second
too soon for the old man to get
aboard. In the long whistle pro
longed for many seconds the en
raged parent heard his defeat, and
the last that was seen ot him lie
was running madly alter the train,
with fist clenched and brandished,
at the passengers, whoso jeers
came borne on the wiud from the
rear platform.
The age of the boy was fifteen
and that of the girl thirteen.—
They disembarked at the next sta
tion, were quickly made one, and,
the next day, returned in peace to
tire husband’s home.
From the San Francisco Chronicle.
How to Put on si Corset.
At this juncture the Coroner de
sired to show to the jury the
course taken bj' the ball, and for
this purpose produced the corset
worn by Mrs. Burkhart at the
time of the tragedy "You sec,’’
said lie—and here lie drew the cor
set around his waist with thy laces
in front—"the ball must gave gone
in here from behind. N 6, that
can’t be, either, for the Doctor
says the bull went in in front.—
Confound it, I’ve got it all wrong.
Ah! this way.” (Here the coro
ner put the Corset on upside down.)
“Now, you see,” pointing to the
hole in the garment, which rested
directly over his hip —“the ball
must have gone inhere. N»>, that
can’t be either, for ”
Here Mr. MatheV, the handsom
est man on the jury, broke in.—
‘Dr, Stillman,” said he, “you’ve
got that corset ou wrong/* IJeie
Dr. Stillman blushed like a puppy.
“Well," said he, “I’ve been married
twieej and 1 ought to know how
to rig a corset.” "Yes,” said Mr.
Mather, “but you don’t. You had
it right in the first place. The
strings go in front and the ladies
clasp them together in the back.
Don’t 1 know ? I think 1 ought to,
I’ve been married. If yotf doubt
it, look here (pointing to the full
ness in tlie top). How do you
suppose that’s going to be filled
up unless yoo put it on as I sug
gest 7” “That,” said Dr. Stillman,
"why that goes over the hips.—
“No, It don’t,” said Mr. Mather;
“that fullness goes somewhere
else —this way,” and here Mr. Ma
ther indicated where he tlmugi.t
the business ought to go.
At this a paht-facod yiutig m>an
( with a voice like a robin, and a
iiule book under his arm, said lie
thonglrt the ladies always clasped
their corsets on tire side. The
pale faced young nran said this
very innocently, as if he wished
to convey the impression that he
knew notning of (lie matter. The
jury laughed the pale-faced young
man to scorn, and one of them in
timated that he thought tire young
may was not so green about wo
men’s dresses as he tried to ap
pear. The young man was a re
porter, and it is therefore exceed
ingly probable that his knowledge
was fully as limited as was appa
rent from his suggestion, the jury
men to the contrary notwithsund-
I
Here another juryman discov
er’d that l>r. Stillman had the
corset on bottom side up, “Doc
tor,” said lie, “pot it on tb* other
way."
Then the Doetor pot on in rc
versecmler, with the laces in front.
This brought the bullet holes di
rectly over the tails of his coat.
“I don’t think," said Mr. Ma-
ftATES OI'AnVF.UTISIN-G/
space 3 mo’s. G mo’s, jVI ino'e.
1 equine s> A 00 (j ti tKI $ Jit 00
2 sq’rs 0 00 lb 00 l .'> f,O
3 sqr e 800 14 00 J 20(0
t , col. i 2 00 20 00 30 0O
■„ col. 20 00 35 00 GO 00
one col. 40 OO 75 00 10U 00
The money tot advertisements is due
on the first insertion.
A square is lire space of one inch iu
depth of the column, irrespective of the
number of lines.
Marriages nnd deaths, not exceeding
six lines, published free. For a n.an ad
vertising Ids wile, nnd nff other personal
matter, double rates will he charged.
No. 12.
thcr, “that the tullet went in
there, Doctor,’’
‘ No, I dwu’t think it did,” wan
the reply. “Confound it is mighty
funny—six married men in this
room, and no one that knows how
to put on a woman’s corset.”
Here the. chronicle reporter, wlmt
had several sisters and always
keeps his eves open, advanced
and convinced Dr. Stillman and
Mr. Mat fief, alter mneli argument,
that the laces of a corset go be
hind, and that the garment is
clasped in front. After this ex
plan at ton the course of the bullet
was readily traced and found to
bear out the explanation afforded
by two physicians.
II i/m* cTr ou s.
A sea captain explained to nn in
quisitive Indy that tlioy Used shrouds
aboard s ips to bury dead calms at
sea.
Mrs. Annie Buckley, a Cairo wo
man, has achieved an infant which
starts with twenty-one pounds of
substance.
A bashful printer refused a aitua
lion in a priming office where females
were employed, saying that lie never
“set up” with a gal in his life.
An 1 rialiman describing the growth
ot potatoes in Ids native land, said,
as a clincher, “An’ sure, a bushel of
them will fill a barrel,”
An irresponsible fellow says of a
designing spinster that she is liko an
army quartermaster, because it is a
part of her occupation to advertise
tor “proposals."
Suhbs wonders where all the pil
low cases gu to. lie says ho never
asked a giil what she was making,
while sewing, without being told
it was a pillow case.
A New Albany bride waked up
in the night,dorgeitmg she was mar
ried, and aroused the neighborhood
with a rapid succession of shrieks.
She mistook John for a burglar.
A Western editor speaking of his
rival as “mean enough to steel the
swill Iroin a blind hug!” The rival
re tor i s hy saving, “He knows he
lies; l never stole his swill! ”
A man having an non need that 1m
wanted to marry a girl that had
plenty of snap in her, a paper advi
ses him to “go for the Wisconsin
girl who swallowed foity perciis ion
caps the other week ”
A man name 1 Well* having step
ped upon a quicksand in the liver
near Browiisvil'a, he instantly sank
out of ‘light, wheictipon one of hi*
companions remarked, “that’s a new
wav of sinking wells,”
There is a‘i r.vsfer can owned by
some f'oVs of a sportive character, in
Cleveland, that has never vet been
outrun by any dog in a fair street
race. They can always give the dog
the start, but cornu in neck and
neck, or lightly ahead on the home
stretch.
An orator, who had raised his au
dience to a great height by bis lofty
soaring*, exclaimed i
“1 will dose in the beautiful and
expressive language *>f the poet—T
forget fiis name—and —l forget what
he said too.”
"What kind of pens do you sell
here, mister?” asked a bov of a sta
tioner “We keep aM kinds, yon
voting vagabond/’ was tbe rude re
l ply. “Oh, you do. do you? Well,
| then. I’ll take ten ecu's wor.lt of
j pigpens ’’
Little Robbie went to a show, and
saw an elephant for the first time in
his life. When he came home, bis
mother ashed hint, what he had seen.
Robbie replied : “Art efephan*. mam
ma. that gobbled hav with Ids front'
l aril*
j A corpulent old lady asked for a
ticket at the window of one of the
Ilarlein Railroad depots the other
day. when the clerk thought be
would perpetrate a joke, and said,
“Yes’m; will you go in the cattle
train or the passenger train ?” The
old lady looked at him a moment,
and then sai I, “If yon are a speci
men of what I shall find in die pas
senger train, give me a ticket for the
cattle train, by all mentis.”
A Detroit woman named Joyce
had cause for rejoicing a few weeks
ago when her husband—who, *!-
thongo not a thing of beauty, gave
prospects of being a Joyce forever—
consented to sign the following
1 agreement to leave her bed and
board; "Detroith, Februry 21—thin
\ iz too Agre that if mi wife paze me
; 10 dolrs i won’t Never bother Her
1 annv mor as tren as i liv if i doo she
kan sind tlm plyese after me. llknky
Jotc):.”