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herald.
„„ F n EVERY WEDNESDAY, EY
".’gEPtES 4 YARBROUGH.
IVI .ER SI. rEEM-ES, Ed,™
B.ITES OE SOBSCBIPIION
J*fi3SE“v£f
Odc*’ rates are cash-payable
gobscr'P v j 9 i o ns.
tn money *' P. |n _ five subscribers, and
A"? onn S Sveacopy free,
the money-.,"'' wishin g their papers
riub fr r "« rne post-office to another,
name of the post-office
3 , they wish it changed, as well
they wish it seot, _
- |SOJ L advertisements.
Sheriff per square... 500
“ ...5 00
Tax Coll f eC Xinistration 3 00
m
Application for a 3 00
Kstraj notice* - -
Sales of land, by administrators,
„r cuardians, are required by
rStid on the first Tuesday in the
a * e Mween the hoars of ten in the
month, botw j 0 t j, e afternoon, at
" Whi ‘ h
the property les mHBt be given in
.&&••***- »*
“v“ Mt m »'»1 creditors of an
Notice to published 40 days.
the safe of personal proper
(t2he givoii in like manner, 10 days
wiTl be made
. court of Ordinary for leave to
°n fnrl must be published for four weeks.
"'Srl lStc™ of «l,oio»tr..i»,
i .Bin ire must be published 30
lirofordEoission from administration,
13,1,, tte montl,., for d.rm.ss.on
Ifrmii guardianship, 40 days.
I for the foreclosure of mortgages
Last lie published monthly, four months ;
■for establishing lost papere, Vw the full
lie of three months ; for compelling
■titles from executors or administrators,
|where bond has been given by the dc
■ccased.thc full space of three months.
| Sheriff’s sales must be published for
pour weeks.
I Kstray notices, two weeks.
I Publications will always be continued
Lconling to these, the legal requirements,
Knless otherwise orderecK
I professional ;carps.
ftlM. J. WINS. WM. E. SIMMONS.
I WINN & SIMMONS.
attorneys at law,
■,AWItRNCKVIU.E G EORGIA.
I I’ractioe in Gwinnett ami tin- adjoining
Bounties. mar 15-ly
1] N. \j. HUTCHINS,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
B.aWKENCEVIIXF., Ga.
■ Practice in the counties nf the Western
H'ircnit.nnil in Milton and Forsyth of the
■line Ridge. . mar 15-ly
IrVI.KR M. I'KEPLKS,
I ATTORNEY AT LAW,
■aWRESCKVIU.B, GA.
■ Practices in the counties of Gwinnett,
■‘II, Jackson and Milton.
I Pension claims promptly attended to
■ mar 15-6 m
Ij J - N .GLENN,
I ATTORNEY AT LAW,
H*wrenckviu.e, ga.
■ ill promptly attend to all business
■trusted to las care, and also to I .and,
and Pension claims mar 15-Cm
■ RS t KG. A. MITCHELL,
| LAWRENCEVILLE, ga.,
■ Respectfully tender a continuation of
services t° the citizens
constantly on hand a
■ ilss, ! rtmc "t of drugs and chemicals.
inaTl 5^j 10n? careful, y prepared.
■^ 1- sIIA PEER, M. 13.,
■ Hy SICIAN and surgeon,
I UWRENOEVILLE, ga.
■J^rls-6m
I B - v. Roberts,
I , r ArTOUNEY AT Law,
■ ALPHARETTA, GEORGIA,
■ tf) a " business entrusted to
Hiilte count- 16 B Ridge circuit; also
H'^temdrTOit 11 * 11 a " d Gwinnett of
Gl> '' G 11 • Walker in
Hairuit the IT a ai 7 ants an( l LTaim cases
■ s -Government. juU-Cni
| AIR "LINE house,
W''"* Street, near the Car Shed,
I i ATLANT A, GA.
L ( J! TH ’ ■ ■ Proprietor.
■»u. l(^f ' ’ or Lo 'h'n.j, 50 Cent*.
§ G p NTs wanted
■resirinnT- Uo ' MlR I > «ed*H
1 AV la ‘ Cam P a *gn Book
laWo, fjf, C,lue * it.
■ ij A “ PAII,!i Goods. Adddress
lI.J ? DBP EED'S
■ 1 l[ ollst;
[ J ' L,ber, y Street, X ew York.
Weekly Gwinnett Herald.
T. M. PEEBLES, PROPRIETOR.]
Vol. 11.
How a Paper is Made.
A PARODY.
“Tray, how is a newspaper made? ”
The question is easy to ask,
But answer it fully, my dear,
Were rather a difficult task ;
And yet in a bantering way,
As the whippoorwill sings in the glade,
I’ll venture a bit of a lay
To tell how a paper is made.
An editor sits at a desk,
And ponders the thing's that appear
To he claiming the thoughts of the world-*.
Things solemn, and comic, and queer—
And when he has hit on a theme
He judges it well to parade.
He writes, and he writes, and he writes,
And that's how a paper is made.
An editor sits at his desk.
And puzzles his brain to make out
“Telegraphic” so squabbled and mixed,
It is hard to tell what it’s about.
Exchanges are lying around—
While waiting dispatches delayed,
He clips, and he clips, and he clips.
And that’s how a newspaper is made.
An editor out in the town.
In search of the things that are new—
The things that the people have done,
The things thev’re intending to do—
Goes peering and prying about,
For ites of manv a grade;
He tramps, and be tramps, and he tramps,
And that’s how a paper is made.
A nd all that those workers prepare,
Of every conceivable stripe,
Is sent to the printer, and he
Proeedeth to stick in tvpe,
His-lines, all respecting his will.
In slow-moving columns parade—
He sticks, and hes'icks. and he stick,
And that’s how a paper is made.
In short, when the type is all set,
A nd errors cleared up, more or less,
Tis “locked in a form,” as he says,
And hurried away to the press.
The pressman arranges his sheets.
His ink gives the requisite shade,
Then lie p ints and he prints,and he prints,
And that’s how a paper is made.
\! liy xvc Support Greeley.
He is the only man who has any
chance to succeed against Grant
and liis corrupt ring,
lie is an liiM cut mail.
He is a national, and not a sec
tional candidate
He is a statesman, and if elected
will make a good President.
He is in favor of giving to the
people of the State executive juris
diction over their local concerns,
lie docs not get drunk
lie has very few relations to
quarter on the people.
Because tiie South wants repose.
He is opposed to carpet-bag
supremacy.
The South can hope to see no
President for years to come who
did not take part against us in
the civil war, and Greeley is the
most magnanimous of all our late
foes
He is opposed to all sorts of
rings and ling masters.
lie is not mercenary or avarß
cious and has as much money as
he wants.
lie is an ardent friend of agri
culture.
He will not take gifts.
He has no talent for bull pups
and horsemanship.
He does not spend the summer
at Long Branch.
He will not send his children to
Europe, as if they were princes of
the blood, in government vessels.
He is an incessant worker and
not an idler.
lie will not appoint an imbecile
cabinet.
He will surround himself with
statesmen.
Our diplomacy under his admin
istration will not be a series of
blunders and backdowns
He will restore the fraternal
feelings that once existed between
tlie people of the North and the
South, aud put an end to the war
for our utter subjugation that is
still waged against us.
A Pecuniary Dog.—Some years
ago a ctiarcoal peddler, not far from
Hartford, says the Times, had a New
foundland dog which ho had taught
to jump into his basket and lie low
while he filled in the charcoal. When
the peddler carried the basket, very
full, into the cellar, the purchaser
looking out of the window and
checking the baskets* was quite :atis
fied. The dog, well trained, trotted
out with his master in a ‘‘nonchalance
manner,” to use the apt expression of
a military chieftain. The daughter
of this old charcoal peddler spent
several summers at Saratoga during
the war, with two large "solitaires”
on her person.
■ •♦> m -- ——
Speak kindly at night, for it n>ay
be that before the dawn some loved
one may finish his or her space of
life for this world, and it would be too
late to ask forgiveness.
Lawrenceville, Ga., Wednesday, October 2, 1872.
A Deserved Compliment from
tlie Special Correspondence
of the Morning News.
One of the most important and
beneficial measures piftsed by the
Legislature at its late session, was
the bill introduced by Senator Stead
man, of Newton county, for the en
couragement of cotton and Woolen
manufactures of Georgia. The act
exempts from taxation for a period ol
ten years all mills and factories that
may be hereafter built in the State
for the purpose of manufacturing
cotton and wool, whether into cloth
or yarns. The exemption includes
‘county and municipal, as well as
State taxes, and embraces the real
estate, buildings, machinery and
other property employed in the busi
ness. The act covers not only new
enterprises, to be undertaken here
after, but all additions to existing es
tablishments.
The effect of this law upon the
prosperity of the State will be in the
highest degree beneficial. We may
confidently expect a large amount of
the idle capital of the North to be
attracted hither, especially if Mr.
Greeley should be elected. There is
no reason why all the cotton grown
in Georgia should not he manufac
tured upon our own soil. Fuel and
labor are cheaper here than in the
Northern States, and the climate is
far better, while there is unsurpassed
water power at Columbus and Car
tersville, sufficient to spin and weave
up every bale of cotton and pound of
wool we shall ever he able to pro
duce. Indeed, there is hardly a
county north of a line drawn from
Columbus, on Chattahoochee, to Au
gusta on the Savannah,in which there
not an ample supply of labor, fuel
and water power to work up all the
wool and cotton grown within their
respective limits All we need is
capital, and this Mr. Steadman’s hill
was designed to invite from more fjr
tunate communities.
"We take the above extract from
the very intelligent Atlanta cones*
nondent of the Savannah Morning
News, “Ogeechee,” whose reviews of
the proceedings of the Legislature
•luring the recent session, have been
followed l»y ns with more than ordi
narv inletest. The independent spirit
which matks the correspondence of
this leading State journal is a true
reflex of the presiding genius of Sa
vannah, whose proverbial sincerity
renders appreciable a compliment
paid or a censure administered. It is
much to he regretted that the press
generally do not recognize this as the
sure approach to that popularity,
which secures a lasting friendship in
the preservation of that self respect.
With this reflection, readily suggest
ed by the spirit of the News, we are
prepared to recognize the deserved
compliment paid to our distinguished
fellow-citizen in the extract which
we have made from the correspond
ence of “Ogeechee.” To fully esti
mate the importance of this measure
as one of sound State policy, we have
but to comprehend the effect in any
community of well conducted manu
factures. There’is not now, nor can
there bo at any time, a more impor
taut subject for reflection among the
good citizens of our State, than the
inauguration of a judicious system of
immigration, and such measures of
ecouomy in the consumption of our
domestic products as will add to the
w-ealth of the community. Whether
wo view the results to he secured by
the establishment of factories, as an
increase of population, or as a means
of retaining the value of our prod
ucts at home, wo cannot place too
high au estimate upon the policy as
a sure means of adding to our pros
perity. In a pamphlet prepared by
the Honorable Senator, who has de
voted a life time to the study of the
question, we have these propositions
fully demonstrated in advance to
those practical experiments which
have added so much to the wealth of
Augusta, Athens, and many other
manufacturing points in Georgia.
If instead of exporting the cotton
of Newton, Walton, Rockdale or
Clarke counties, every pound of these
thousands of bales could be converted
here at home, into yarns, or cloth,
our population of industrious work
ing citizen? would not only be quad
rupled but every cent of the profits,
arising from the conversion of our
products into fabrics abroad, would
be retained at Lome. The margin
between the price received now by
the producer in this section for his
cotton and the price paid by the
same producer, for his own product
converted into bomespuu or calico in
New Jersey or in England, would, on
one cotton crop, add $300,000 to the
wealth of Newton county alone. Moro
than enough to establish a first-class
cotton factory. What we want to
start this wise system of political
“COMING EVENTS CAST THEIR SHADOWS BEFORE!”
economy is capital, and the act pre
pared by Senator Steadman, exempt
ing this capital from taxation for a
period of ten years, is designed as a
Mentis of securing this.
We cannot but agree with “Ogee
cbee,” in pronouncing this bill of
Senator Steadman’s “one of the most
important and beneficial measures
passed by the Legislature at Its late
session and congratulate this sec
tion • that with the sagacity of true
statesmanship we have been so ably
represented in the Senate. * * C.
—-—-
Chain—Shot.
Colonel Andrew J. Kellar was a
“rebel” who fought four years for his
country with bravery and distinction.
He is now the candidate of the Libe
ral Democratic party for Congress,
from the 9th District of Tennessee.
In*his brave address to the people, he
concludes in the follow ing manner:
The Southern people understand
the political situation, and will work
out their salvation if the politicians
of the old school will no longer op
pose them. There are two things
the Southern people desire to do, and
will do : First, to regain for the South
ern States positions in the new liiion
equal to those of the Northern States;
and, secondly, to restore at home
friendly feeling and mutual confi
dence between the whites and the
blacks. The first can be accomplish
ed by a restoration of a sentiment of
nationality, and a sespect and rever
ence for the Constitution as it is,
The second, by being just and gene
rous to the colored people, without
whose labor the Southern States
would be vast uncultivated fields,
growing into a wilderness.
The good will and good opinion of
my fellow-citizeus are more precious
to me than the mere honors of a pub
lie office But the South cannot now
return to the old grooves. If I am
elected to Congress, I shall go there
not as the chattel of any administra
tion or of any party. So long as the
incoming administration, whether it
bo that of Grant or Greeley, adheres
to that policy of administration which
recognises and invites equality of the
State* in this Union, 1 will sustain
it ; when it departs from those prln
ciples which un lerlie such a policy,
I shall take ny position in the ranks
of the opposition
The nomination of Horaco Greeley
was the work of disorganiseis, a ma
jority of whom were in the ranks o
the Republican party. IDs noruina
tion meant, and means, if it means
anything, the disintegration of the
old political war parties, which are
incapable of inaugurating and execut
ing a policy of peace, because the
leaders of these parties were the au
thors of a sectional, civil war, ami
cannot, if they would, forget the
hates and evil memories of the past.
Around the smoking ashes of the
war, these men are standing; and
they love to rake them over, rather
than to shake hands across a “chasm”
which none but these old leaders see.
I am therefore opposed to a rebel as
well as to a Union party ; to a Con
federate as well as to a Federal party ;
to a wite man’s party and to a black
man’s party ; to a sectional Republi
can party as well as to a sectional
Democratic party ; in short, opposed
to everything which serves no other
purpose but to keep alive the bates
and animosity of the war. The
great need of the Republic is a truly
National party, which will recognize
ami enforce not only the perfect
equality of rights before the law of
every citizen, but every State in the
Union. A new and more perfect
Union is what the South should
claim.
The Republic of the United States
is your inheritance and your chil
dren’s ; the Constitution is the only
bond which binds the States together,
and must be respected and preserved
as a sacred covenant and ark of
safety.
If elected as your member in Con
gress, I shall go there to work in the
cause of reconciliation, and in that
cause shall appeal to the more pros
perous States of the L nion to foster
and develop the Commercial and in
dustrial interest of Memphis, of ieu
nessee and the Southwest.
We all hear much about a reform
party. Before national reforms can
be adopted we must have a re-union
of citizens who were in both armies;
who have belonged to both political
parties, but who are now sick of sec
liotial bates, tired of the leadership
of politicians of the war school, and
who are earnestly devoted to the re
public as oue and indvisible
AsdrkwJ Kkllak.
Good is slow; it climbs. Evil is
swift; it descends. Why should we
■ marvel that it makes greater progress
iu a shorter time ?
Without the Newspapers.
A correspondent of the Woodstock
Patriot, writing of his voyage across
the Atlantic, says i
“One of the features of a sea voy
age which it is very difficult for a
landsman to accustom himself to, is
the entire absence of all news from
tlie outside world. Accustomed as
we are to have our daily paper on mu
table every morning, and to glance
over the news that untiring corres
pondepts have gleamed from every
part of the woild, it seems a strange
deprivation to pass day after day in
entire ignorance of whatever is trans
piling among the busy haunts of
met). Then there is no post-office to
go to two or three times every dav ;
no letters to he received fiom fiiends
and kindred. The ship’s company j
is, for the time being, a community
apart by itself, and it has to live, as
it. were, in a -world of its mm, Vet
even here there are advantage* to
offset these inconveniences. The fa
vored speculator chii rest for a while, ,
with no gold speculations to peiple*
and annoy him. We are for a sen
son out of the reach of tlie telegraph,
where no gloomy, . worrying dis
patches can ferret ns out. The let
ters that await Us at our journey's
end are read with a hungering de
light and enjoyment such as we do
not feel at other times. With an ap
petite sharpened by abstinence, we
eagerly glance over the files of news
papers, aid we learn to appreciate
how much we are indebted to the
Press for a Urge share of our enjoy
ment and instruction. I have spo
ken of the social spirit which mani
fests itself among the passengers.
But toward the end of the voyage
one finds that that there is also an
other aspect of the subject under the
workings of the same social law—we
cluster into affinities on shipboard as
well as elsewhere. Many persons
who were quite intimate at first have
very plainly become tired of each
other, and were it not for the fact,
that they are cooped up and walled
on shipboard, would get as far away
from them as possible. 1 can imag
ine that persons who are not specially
congenial to each other, if thrown
together in tins way for two or three
ini>ntlis, would come tb hate and
loa'ho each other. So true is it that
many people are besL friends at a dis
tance, and that it does hot do to sec
too much of one ai other.”
Historical Lessons from a
it rick.
Who would suppose that an hum
ble brick would he capable of im
parting valuable and important In
formation, even to corroborate the
sacred writings? But an Austrian
mvanl lias discovered, by means of a
microscope, in a stone taking from a
pyramid of Dasliour, many interest
ing particulars connected with the life
of the Egyptians. The brick itself is
made of mud of the Nile, chopped
straw, and sand, thus confirming what
the Bible aud Herodotus have handed
down to us as the Egyptian method
of brick-making. Besides these ma
terials the microscope has brought
other things to light—the debris of
river shell, of fish, and of insects,
seeds of wild and cultivated flower*,
corn and barley, the field pea. and
the common flax,cultivated probably
both for food and texihle purpose,
and the raddisb, with many others
known to science. There were also
manufactured products, such as frag
merits of tiles and pottery, and even
pieces of string made of flax and
sheep’s wool. It has been truly said
that the antiquities of Egypt “have
not only confirmed Scripture history
in the most complete manner, hut
revealed each subtle harmonies of
geography, habits, manners, customs,
and language as prove that that iiis
tory must have prececde! from con
temporary writers ?”
- ■ ■ -- •
“Put up or Shut UP— For the
past week SIO,OOO has been waiting
at the office of the Daily News to
bet that Horace Greeley will be the
next President of the United States.
This fact has been daily advertised,
yet among the thousands of men who
have made hundreds of thousands and
even millions out of the administra
tion, not one of them will risk a dol
lar of their ill gotten gains upon the
candidate whom they say is “sure to
he re-elected,” “a perfect walk over,”
“Greeley no chance in the world.”
Now, gentlemen, all of you are not
too pious to bet money, and even if j
you are, you can (if you win) dis- ;
pense it in charity, or make another
handsome present to Ulysses. Who
knows, when Grant reconstructs his
cabinet (as it is rumored he has prom
jged a prominent journalist to do so),
but that a present bought with this
money might make the lucky fellow
Secretary of the Treasury ? —A. Y.
Sunday New.
[s2 A YEAR, IN ADVANCE.
Our Public Men.
Jefferson died comparatively poor;
indeed, if Oohgress had Wot pur
chased his library, and given him for
it five times its value, he would with
difficulty have kept the wolf from the
door,
Madhon saved motley and was
comparatively rich. To add to his
fortune, however, or rather to that of
his widow, Cotigress purchased his
manuscript papers and paid $300,000
for them !
Janies Monroe, tlie sixth l’residont
of the United States, died in New
York so poor thtlt his remains found
a resting place through the charity of
his friends.
John Quincy Adams left some
$50,000, the result of industry, pro -
deuce atid inheiitancC. He was a
man <>f method and economy.
Mum in Van Boren died very rich.
Throughout Ihs political life he look
ed out for his inteiest. It is not be
lieved that lm over spent thirty shil
ling'in politics. 11 is party shook
i lie bush and he caught the bird.
Daniel Webster squandered a mill
ion in his life, the product of his pro
lo'sional and political speculations,
lie died leaving property to his chil
dren and his debts to his friends.
The former sold for less than $20,000,
the latter exceeding $250,900.
Henry Clay left a handsome estate.
It probably exceeded SIOO,OOO. lie
was a prudent manager and a scru
pulously honost man in all his trans
actions.
James K. Folk loft about $150,000
$50,000 of which he saved from his’
Presidency of four yeats.
John Tyler left $20,000. Before
lie reached the Presidency he was a
bankrupt. In office he husbanded
bis means and then married a rich
wife.
Zachary Taylor left $150,000.
Millard Filmore is a wealthy man,
and keeps his money in a strong box.
It will not bo swalled up in specula
tion nor squandered in vice.
A Bream that Was not all a
Dream.
There must be something in omens
after all, particularly those that are
not influenced by indigestion, or some
other squally complaint equally pat
ent in disturbing tlie mental machin
ery. A mnn who eats a square meal,
votes the Liberal ticket, or a woman
who don’t want to veto or ride «
hone man fashion, may place a good
degree of reliance upon a well arranged
dream. This, we opine, is the con
clusion that a down East skipper came
to on the occasion of a recent cruise
in his schooner Belvidore Accord
ing to the account published in the
Gape Ann Advertiser, Captain Sunt.
Ell well, while sailing from the Ganges
to Capo Ann, dreamed that he saw
floating upon the sea a dead body.
All his efforts to secure it were un
successful, and his distress at seeing
this vessel ride over it awakened him.
He went immediately upon deck to
convince himself that the whole thing
had been a dream, and to shake off’
the impression it had left upon him.
While telling some of the crew
about it their attention was attracted
by a box which was floating toward
them. As it came nearer they tried
to grapple it and hiing it on deck,
but the waves washed it under the
vessel and they passed over it just as
he had passed over the body in his
dream. After this lie could not rest
until lie had sent a boat after it and
it was secured. Upon opening the
box, lying upon a bed of seaweed,
they found the body of a little girl,
whose bright golden hair lay over
tiie forehead concealing the marks of
probably her death blow. She was
nicely dressed, about four years old,
and had evidently beeu dead about
ten days As they were net to land
for several days, and as decomposition
had already begun, they had no alter
native but to sink the box in the
ocean. Whether the dreadful crime
can be traced to its perpetrators or
not is doubtful, but that a dream
should have disclosed it is very
strange. —Louisville Ledffer.
Eveything in life has a right side
and a wrong side. You can take any
joy, and by turning it around, find
troubles on the other side; or you
may take the greatest trouble, and by
turning it around find joys on the
other side. The gloomiest mountain
never casts a shadow upon both sides
at once, nor doe* the greatest of life’s
calamities.
Filial gratitude is an amiable trait
wherever found ; it should he cher
ished by every possible means, and
will meet its appropriate reward.
This world and the next resemble
the East and the West; you cannot
draw near one without turning your
hack to the other.
KAILS OF ADVERTISING.
spAcr 3 mo's. (> mo’s. 12 mo's.
U| i ire cr 1 ,)() | f, >)() g ltToo
2 sq m ii irt) io oo lft
3 *qr'* H 00 It 00 20 {,)
>4 col. 12 00 20 00 30 00
!g col. 20 OO 3ft (K) CO Of)
one col. 4(< no 7’> no Ih> oo
The money for advertisements is due
on the first insertion.
A Square is the space of one inch in
depth of the column, irrespective of the
number of lines.
Marriages and deaths, not exeeedii g
six lines, published free. For a man ad
vertising ills Wife, and all other personal
that ter, donble rates will lie charged.
No. 29.
A Sun-struck Maniac.
The distance from’ Utica to Rome
is about one good square jump for
Maik Twain's frog. Rome is not
built on seven bills, hut is built on
the Erie Canal, 1 saw a Roman War
rior to day. lie was a chiropodist,
and wanted to take my corns out for
a dollar.
Says I, “Fvogot nocorns.’’
flays he, “Well, p|| take vour bun*
ions out for the same price.’'
Says I, “I wish, Mr. Julius Ctcsar,
that I had a bunion, so you could
take it out for a dollar, for your price
is very cheap ; hut I haven’t got any.”
Says he, ‘Why do you call me
Julius Otesar, sir ?”
Says I, “Because you hro a Roman
corn cures.”
He left as if he was (tying to catch
a baso ball on the fly.
1 shall remember Rome. Yenrs
ago the citizens got ilp a fair to try
and raise money to buy a minister a
night-shirt. I went to it. The clerks
at the fair Were fair females. I gave
a gal a five dollar hill for a chicken’s
hind leg without any gravy on it,
and she never gave me anv change
back. I loinarkc I iliat that was
dear. She offered to bet me the
price ot the pen wiper that it wasn’t.
I took the bet, and says I to tlie
gal 'lie ha>l with her:
“Don’t you think that it is dear ?’’
“No, sir,” saiil she j ‘I know it
ain’t deer; it’s chicken.”
I paid for the pen wiper.
I visited another tßblc,and I bought
a littie cottoh flannel dog for a dollar.
There was only three cents worth of
flannel and one cent’s worth of stuf
sing in that whole dog, and its tail
couldn't possibly have cist over two
cents to import. It was made to
stick pins into, and l could stick pin*
into it all day and it wouldn’t stir. I
think I paid too much for the dog. for
since that 1 bought a dog for fifty
cents, and you can’t stick one pin
into him without his sod.
Rome is a watering-place ; J saw
’em watering it to day with carts.
During the month ol August be
careful of your health, and never take
over eight watermelons at one dose.
To cure inosqiietocs fold them up
in six thicknesses of sheet iron, and
lay them in the bottom of the well.
It you haven't a well put on your
pumps, and heel’em standing on
’em.
Too many ears of corn will kill
people. Nature never intended tiie
stomach should have eais.
Whale* ate larger than silkworms
this year.
An infant prodigy exists in Rome.
She lives on a corner. Her mother
sent her to buy a spool of cotton.
The merchant prim e whom she visit
ed, raised himself from an old cheese
Im>x, on which his noble form was re
clining, and said ;
“Will you liavo Coat’s cotton ?”
“No,” said tlie little girl, “1 don’t
want Cont’s cotton Ma wants it to
sew pa’s pant* with.’’
Since this wen*red two planets
liaie been dlscoVeied at Clinton, New
York.
All fl*li caught In seines are net
profits.
Gum mucilage, poured in equal
quantities on you- head, will make
your hair stick to you
1 saw a man to-day, who speaks four
languages, viz: New York, Boston,
Hoboken, and English, lie is verv
mean—meaner than Bill Gilbert'*
powder. It is said that Bill Gilbert's
powder had grains as big as Inn kle
berries, and that a man might wade the
bad pi ce six week* with a sack of it
on Ins back a itli perfect safety. This
man, who is meaner than Bill Gil
bert’s powder, has been promising for
two yeai* to take his family to a wa
tering place; and one da)’ last week,
after they had been two week* pack
ing their trunk*, lie Idtchcd up his
team and drove ’em a!f down to the
pump.
The residents of Rome all believe
that lobster* are cooked in red water.
One of ’em tried to mrke me believe
it. lie swore that he’d seen ’em
when they were ripe, and not cooked,
and they were always green.
1 liomas Keno, aged twenty seven
) cars, four mouths and four days, got
into a boxing match the oilier day.
He had his eye blacked. He says
“it was a box of blacking did it.”
Anv how he got well polished off.
Bill Heads has an excellent ac
quaintance among book-keeper*.
The gum of ben-velo,* have no
teeth on’em.
To grow sweet milk, feed yoitrcows
on tube roses. If you want milk for
pies, feed your goat on old handbills.
A* the back* of tjiern arc covered
with paste they mike good milk f.>r
pastry. If you want milk to make
butter of a rich yellow color, feed
your goat on on old straw baU ; he’ll
eat ’em.