Newspaper Page Text
F. R. FILDES, Editor.
VOL. V.
Miscellaneous.
AGENTS W ANTED ! ‘
TO BF.LL OUR CKI.KBRATKD
GOLDEN FOUNTAIN
Acknowledged )*y all win* have used them tt> Iv
the best Pen rnade or sold in this country. N )
blotting! Nocoiled fingers 1 Sixty lines writ
ten with one non of ink ! Will outwear any s?<vl
pen ever made Bankers,; merchants, *eaohet ?
and all classes endorse them in the highest terms ,
of praise. Put up in neat slide boxes. Prices: i
two boxes. .*>o ct»nts ; five boxes SI.OO. Sent
free of postage, and guwantced to give perfect j
Liberal Commission to Agents!
We arc prepared to give any energetic person
taking the agency of these Pens, n commission
which will pay Two Hundred Hollars per month.,
Three sample Pens will be mailed for 10 cents
•Address,
W&sTEUN PUBLISHING CO.
PITTSBURbIJ, PjU*
April tAtb, 1870. fim
fuenitusehoule;
JOHN M. WITT,
Cabinet Jliikev sUndcrtalciT, ■
QUITMAN, CA.
fTVVKSS pleasure in notifying the,
I citizens of Brooks and adjoiningeSaSSK*! I
Counties, that he has established atLJweawKaS !
Quitman, a regular Furnit m*o 3lnu
nlsK*toi*^ r , and is prepared to put up to
order—
BUREAUX, BEDSTEADS, SECRETA
KIES, SIDEBOARDS, TABLES,
WARDROBES,
anti everything needed Li the Furniture liue. nail
in .inv style required.
An experience of many years. justifies tiim in
ftssui'inn the public that his work will give satis- j
faction in every respect.; and prices will eem j
pare favonOily with those of Savannah nr else j
where, with this important advantage to the .pur- !
chaser : every piece us Furniture leaving his es- i
tablishment will he warranted.
>■£». ItepniiinS done with neatness,
ami dispatch.
UNDERTAKER’S BUSINESS.
In connection with the Furniture business, he
is also conducting that of l NiiKßl'AKi.it, nod
will put 11)1. on very short notice, any descrip
tion of COi-TiN -Plain or Ornamented, neatly
trimmed, and mounted, if desired.
A general assortment of Coffins always kept
on hand.
jffiDr Prices as mod oral - ns possible.
WANTED.
T am in need of a large, qnantit/ of SEA“ j
SOWED LUMBER, y'! l : j ; 1 j
China. <’hurry, .Map!'*, l!!a< > ‘dsisnuf. Ac., Ac.,
for which a libera! price will be paid,
JOEEKf m. V7ZTT. !
Quitman. Ga. f .Tail 22, Ibiiil. Fit j
Purehisers of mijpic will consult tlmir own in
f * rests by subscribing to PutKits’ Mrsihai. M"\- j
a in,v. ft is issued on the first of each month. |
r nd gives all the latest and best Music, by such j
« utfeorsaS Hays. Iviiikle, Tlmnras. Hiahnp. hanks, j
I edit, Frev. Keller. Wym m. A c. Ev >-ry nnmls.-i |
r&ini peters* l w .:Vh
good Music, minted on -fine white paper and j
from full size music plat. -. . v ypi - "b.ch j
i. afterwards priuted in rh-'fl Iwrin. from ih«* j
s imo plates, and sold at from dd toiOccnts em-u. j
\ aluable musical '■v:; 1 :."
i t HO cents a copy, $3 a year, $ I • >'* lor : \ months-, j
and we guarantee to every yearly subseviber at
least 43- pages of ch «icc new music, bv the best
authors. We do not expect Peteta Musical i
MONTHLY VIcTZ
we give too much music for the money. It is is- \
aued simply to introduce our new music to the }
musical world. Ot sub»cvib ,, rs sing and I»la\ j
the music we give them. Then musical trieid-'j
hear the music, like it. and buy it in sheet music j
form, where we make our profit.
SGO for *y>3. j . . ,
Remember! every yearly sub p an, P * ®
seviber trots dining the year.l
rtt loust 150 piecrs of oar best faß bc sccn a *
music, all of which we after-1
w.inl print iu A H form und’^M® 3 " B° nn * r
sell for over SOO. It. v> l»ub*|
Its had at tie* Mammoili Mum M.. |
Store of J L. Peters, 50iJ Broadway, New 1 ork, !
where every thing in the music line can be had. j
No matter bow small your order, it will be
promptly attended to. inalß-;*m
COMFORT AND ( ' IH-: FOR Tire ruptur-
ED. Sent p- . H alii on vy ■■eipt-of 10 cents.
Address l>r. E. B. Foot l , (Author of Medical
Common Sense.) No. I*2o Lexington Avenue,
New York. 11-fan
Vw.\ r wn i • lks. oid . -
new. e.idly, without doctor or medicines.
Sent post-paid on receipt of 10 cents. Address
Dr. E. B. Foote, 120 Lexington Avenue, New
York, 11-fm
MANUFACTORY.
QUITMAN, GA.
Bozeman & Lewis,
TANARUS) ESPECTFULLY notify the public that they I
\j have purchased the Shop, Tools, Material, !
Ac., recently owned by Mr. Samuel A. Graves. (
and propose to carry on the manufacture of Car- j
riages, Buggies, Wagons, etc., iu any style desir- j
ed, arid in a substantial, workmanlike manner. ,
MR. II T. FRET WELL,
. i
Conceded to be one of the best workmen in this J
section of country, will have charge of the Car ■
riage and Wagon Shop, which is a guarantee of j
good work.
We are also prepared to do all kinds of "\Yood j
work, and General Repairing. And in- connec
tion with our establishment, is a complete
BLACKSMITH SHOP,
Where planters and othefs no dins work in that
lino, c.m be accommodated on fair asms.
We are bard-working man, andderire to make
an honorable living. t strict attention to le.si
nass, and therefor" ; -‘' rily solicit a portion
of the patronage of the politic.'
BOZEMAN i- LEWIS.
Thankful lo my patrons for their liberal sup
port, I would cheerfully recommend for their
patronage. Messrs. Bozeman dr Lewis.
>’J Mi'll A. ORAVES.
January 7, I>7G- L-ts
(The (Quitman lUnucv,
ITi!USI!i:i) FYKUY PKIHaY.
iERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
Foi one year $2 00
For six months 1 Op
TERMS FOR ADVEKTISIXa.
One square, (TO lines, or less,) first Insertion
$2.00; each following insertion, SI.OO,
When' advertisements are continued for one
month or longer,-the charge will be as follows :
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jo Months.
; 1 Months.
15 Months.
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(7 Months.
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'l2 Months. I
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1112.00 18 24 30 30 40 42 44 4(i| 53
5 I ‘.OO 25 *33 SO 44 40 48 50 52j GO
61 16.00) 30 40 45 50l 551 56 57 58, 05
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Legal notices charged For the same as other
advertisements.
Obituary notices. Tributes of Respect, and aP
article; of a personal character, charged for a?
dlvTi’iisciiients.
j For announcing candidates for office, SIO.OO
MioccUancotis,
m. mm tm wiS
* D.ar, dear! no toast; eggs boiled as
j l ard as brick’ats, and the c<
C. Id ’’ M) ' v Xi\p> .
And Mr. Peters rose from tbc table in
a temper by no means amhrb'e, rnd
rang the bell violently There was no
answer He rang again, a third, a
f-nrtirtime, and still no answer! Out
of all patience, lie went to the door and
called—‘ Maria! Mafia!"
A slight, pretty little woman dressed
in a .soiled, tumbled wrapp r, with hair
in a direful state of confusion, answered
bis summons. She had one of those j
bright faces which Nature intended
should be decked with continual smiles;
but now, all its roses in hloom, it was
drawn to its fall length, and the large
blue eyes bad a serious, or ratlier|duleful 1
expression, tota'ly at variance with
their usual joyous look. Her voice, too,
bad lost its melodious, ringing sound, j
i and was subdued to a dismal whine.
“What, is it Joseph?”
Where’s Bridged?"
“Go: o out for me. I want more
white ribbon for my ascension robe."
Mr. Peters said a very naughty word
and then continued: “Hold coffee, hard
eggs, breakfast not fit to cat.”
1 1 wish;” whined his wife, “you would
think less id temporial matters, and turn
year attention to the great end of life'" ]
Hang it h'l, madam, I like to enjoy ;
my life while Ido have it. Here was I, j
the liapji i si man in (lie l nited Mates, :
with a pleasant home, a chatty, chcei in! ;
loving wife, and good,quiet children; and
now, since y< u have j lined the Millcrites
what am 1?”
‘Oil Joseph, if you would only, come j
into that blessed circle."
‘Oh, Maria,j if you would only come j
out of it. Where are the hoy a?”
“I'm sure I dont know."
“Are they going lo school to day?” !
‘No, dear Joseph.”
“For what reason, madam? ’
“My dear, the teacher has given up ;
the school, and is turning her mind to j
ntor •( x died objects. Oh, Joseph, turn
now, while there is time. You have
still a week for preparation and repen
tance.”
“It 'pentanee! Well, when I take up
the subject, it wi l ! take mote than a
week to put it through-”
Aril Mr. Peters put on his coat and >
t ok up Lis hat.”
“Joseph,” said his wife, “you need |
not send home any dinner. 1 shall be
ont, and I shall take the boys over to
their uncle’s to dinner.”
Joo made no answer, unless the vio
lently emphatic manner in wh eh he
closed the door was one. Muttering
with anger, he strode into a restaurant
to make a breakfast- Here bo was
i bailed by one of bis friends, Fred. Som-
I niers, who looked up as he hoard Joe’s
! order.
“Hallo!’ he cried, 'yon here!’—What
' are yon doing litre at brcaklast time?
1 Wife sick?’
‘N .’
‘Had a quarrel?’
“No.’
| ‘TI on why don’t you breakfast at
j home?’
‘Ch’mnry on fire?’
‘No’
‘Servants all dead?’
i ‘No.’
* Well, what in thunder is to pay?’
'Maria’s j dried the Milleritesl’
‘Fred gave a long, shrill whistle, and
then said: Going to ascend next week?
‘Yes, and if I don’ commit suicide in
the meantime, you may congratulate me.
| I an almost distracted. Can’t get a de
cent meal, children rulining riot, servants
saucy, house ail in coufusi in, wife got
the blues, either"qn iting tiro speeches of
the elders at me; or sewing on a white :
p e, ad groan i>g every third or faurli
, stitch.
‘Hang it all, Pud I’ve a great mind to
' take poison or join the army.
' ‘H’m! Urn! you give an enchanting
■ picture, but I ttink I cuu suggest a cure
HERE SHALL TIIE PRESS THE PEOPLE’S RIGHTS MAINTAIN, tJNAWED BY PEAR AND UNBRIBED BY GAIN.
QUITMAN, GEO., JUNE 24, 1870.
‘A cure?’
‘Yes, if yon will promise to take my
advice, I will make your home pleasant,
your wife cheerful, and your children
happy.’
‘Do it!' cried Joe. I’ll follow your
word like a soldier under his superior
(i If cor. What shall I do?' At tea time
Mr. Peters entered his home, whistling,
Mai ia was seated at her sewing, and
there were no signs of preparations for
the evening meal.
‘Maria, my dear,’said Mr. Peters,'is
tea ready?’
'I don’t know,’ was the answer, ‘have
been out all day attending meeting-’
'Oh, very well; never mind. Atten
ding meeting?’ You have resolved, then
to leave next week!’
‘Oh! Joseph, I must go when I am
called.’
'Yes, my dear, of course. Well, 1
must resign myself, I suppose. By the
way, my clear, has it ever occurred ro
you that 1 shall be left a widower with
three children? I think I am a hand
some man yet, my love,’ and Joe walked
over to the glass, passed his fingers
through his hair, and pulled up his Col
lar uw mui.looki-.’f H'-'Atl.er s; “ wised.
. ‘A iiif vice, deal, it’, Jean ~; l relief for
you to go quickly, you know• It is so
wearing on the nerves to have long ill
ness; and besides, my dear, there will be
no funeral expense to p >y, and that is
quite a saving,’
Mrs Peters lip quivered, and her large
blue eyes filled with tears, Joe longed
to quit his heartless speech and comfort
her, hut he was fearful tho desired ef
fect was not yet gained.
‘So, my dear,’ he continued, if you
must go, I have been thinking of getting
another wife.’
‘What?’ cried Mrs. Peters.
‘Another wife, wife my love The
house must he kept in order, and the
boys cared for.’
The grief was gone from Maria’s face,
but her teeth were set with a look of
tierce wrath.
‘Another wife, Joseph! Another wife!
‘Yes, I think I have selected a good
successor. I have deliberated a long
time, when I was a bachelor, between
her and yourself. You will like her; she
is your bosom fi iend.'
‘Wb.it Sarah liigram?’
‘Yes, my flear, I think that mi the day
you a a.i ml, I will many Sarah Ingram!
‘Wliatl that good fornot iug, silly,
empty-headed old maid rhe mother of my
children! Wliatl’
‘Well, my dear, it seems to ho the beijt j
iliat I £<; und >. 1 ihm't want tip leave my
business to go a courting, and she will
have! me, 1 know.’
‘No doubt] Oh, yon great brutal, bate
ful
'Stop, my dear, don’t fly into aj fury!
\Ye wi'l try to spend our last week iu
happiness. Oh, by the way, I have a
propositi nr te make.’
'Goon, sir! I) n't spare me!’
'Alt, yes, that is the very tiling 1 wish
to do. I know your mind is entirely
engrossed with your assension, and 1
wish to spare you the care of the house.
Hupp ;o you invite Sarah here to-mor
row, to stay, a week !’
‘What!’
‘Then I can arrange onr matrimonial
preparations in the evening, while you j
arc at the lecture,’
‘ Wba' I’
‘And yon can leave the house in lie r i
| charge all day. That will give
I ty of tin e to go out. and. she cun learn
the ways of the house.’
'Wba: 1’
‘And, rny dear, one little favor. It
may bo the last I shall ever ask of you.
Stay at home-one or two day-s and show
her around where you keep things, and
so on, so that she won’t have any troub
le in keeping order after you go. You
will do this to oblige me, won’t you?’
Mrs. Peters, for an answer, rolled up
j the ascension r be into a ball arid fired
l it at Joe. The cotton, scissors, work
basket and table-cloth followed each
other in rapid succession, and he was
unable to fly. Then Maria's rage found
vent in words.
‘So! you arc going to marry Sarah !
That's the reason you whistled so nice
when you cam" in! But yon shan’t mar
ry her, sii! You shan’t have that grat
ideation! I will.stay if it is only to
spite you! I won’t go! I tell you Mr.
Peters, that I won’t go!’
‘But, my dear, you must go if you
are c une for,’
T won’t go!’
‘But consider, mv dear.’
‘I won’t go!’
‘But what will Sarah Ingrahm think
I of it?'
‘Sarah! Don’t dare to mention Sarah
to me again! 1—I—I—oh! —I am fairly
! choking!’ and the little woman threw
h i'ree'f iutaa chair, in a fit of hysterics.
Next morning Mr. Peters met Fred in
the street.
‘Well rdd boy, how goes ir?’
‘Fred,’ w. 13 the rep’y, ‘1 am the hap
piest man in the world! 1 have regain
i ed rny wife and domestic peace, ar.d got
rid of a busy tattling- old maid, who un
der pretenco of loving my wife, was ev
erlastingly interfering in a'l our house
hold arrangements.’
‘Then Mrs Peters will uot ascend, will
she?’
‘lf Sarah is to he my second wife, and
step mother to my children, Mrs. Peters
has concluded that on the whole she will
not go ’
WHAT A WOMAN SEES IN CHINA.
The Chinese officials and men of wealth
live in affluence—dress liohlyqand keep
a host of servants and retainers. But
the poor are very poor; they work for
very low prices, from five to ten cent- a
day, and food and clothe themselves from
these wages. The wealthy arc veiy in
dolcnt, and impose asysi ,j of.servitude
upon their employes which is in many
degrees worse than even American slave
ry in its worst stages could e ver have
been. The peasantry aie a quiet and
industrious people, but scorn to have
no higher aims in life than to make a
comfortable living on their farms, and
to propagate their species. They des
troy a great many of the female children
hence the male population is greatly iu
the majority. The laboring class in
China b tli male and female are literally
beasts of burden; they carry everything
that is used in building a great city, or
in catrying on the commerce of a great
commercial country upon their shoulders
by means of picks and baskets on each
end ol the poles. The peasant women
of China have large and natural feet.—
Tlicir costume consists of wide pains
reaching only to the knee; a loose sack,
reaching a little below tho hips, belted a
round the waist, and a little white apron
halfayaid square, pinned on plain.—
They do not wear any shoes and stock
ings; from the knees tho legs are bare
They have no fire in winter to warm by
and as the cold increases they put on
clothing until they arc of immense size,
and their bodies look like a barrel, with
a head sticking oqf ts tho top, walking
with bare legs and f’cet. None but those
who work in the rice fields in the son
ever wear any covering for the head.—
The rich and the pooT all dress their hair
in the same style; neatly combed in a
low knot on the top of the head, and all
these ornamented with flowersjaad long
hair pins or bodkins either silver or brass
The women of China are not tall, but
stocky and squarely built, aud the week
iug women very muscular. They will
carry with apparent ease two or three
hundred pounds on their shoulders.—
The small-footed women arc unable, to
do any heavy work, us they cannot walk
without a cano or someone to support
them. Nojmnn is satisfied unless lie has
one wife with small feet and unless be
trothed to ono when children by their
parents. They work years to gain
moans to buy one, and smaller the feet
higher the price.
A Timely I’n.tvKit. Before the adjourn
ment of the Alabama Legislature in Mont
joinery, at its last session a pious div
ine who was in the habit of praying for
the convicts in the penitentiary at We
tumpka having the love of truth and
fear of God before him, was requested
by the Speaker of tho House to open the
with prayer, which he did
in thq following manner:
‘Oh, Lord, we pray Thee that thy mer |
cii a may bo extended to those poor men
who have been sent here from all parts
of the United States convicted of various
crimes and misdemeanors : have mercy
upon them we beseech Thee, while they
are here serving out the time for which
they were sent, and when they have serv
ed arid arc dismissed from these walls,
may they return to their Northern homes
better men and in lime may they become
useful arid upright citizens and horiora- I
bio members of the society from whence
they came, we ask in the name and
thioiigh the merits of Christ our Re
deemer. Amen.
As soon as he had closed, old one arm
Richardson, alias Steel Trap, so-called,
frem Wilcox sprang, to his foot and in a
stentorian voice exclaimed. ‘Mr. Prosi. I
dent, I move to strike out Wilcox county’
Ilis amendment was unanimously rejec
ted amid a scene which can be better im
agiued than described.—Wilcox Vindi
cator.
It is related that a merchant in a coun
try town recently hired anew clerk, and
of course initiated him at once into the
mysteries of the “trade mark.’ The
same afternoon the newly inducted
knight of the yard slick was showing
some goods to a laly customer, when
she demurred to the price of the article,
The feelings of the merchant may be im
agined when the young man called at tin
top of his voice: ‘What shall I Sell this
foi? It is marked four dollars and a hall
and cost fifty cents!’ The engagement
with that clerk soon terminated.
•
A young ia ly clerk employed in thr
Treasury Department at .Washington
was nearly (lightened out of her wits
the other Jay by finding a mouse snugly
ensconced La Let chigueu-
Statement and Time Table of tin
lilacß Valley L-ili-oad.
Quit'k Ti/uc! ~~Acr.,::)hioualing Conductors- -Zoic
Psircsl Through Passengers arrive at about
Midnight.
Trains move by the following progres
sivo time table; accidents by ctiUi»ion»
j arc entirely avoided, as no up-trains are
i ruu over this road.
j Sipiiington, 6:00 a. >l I 'Murder Hallow,
■ Tipple ton, Toil) j idi it Flats
i Topersvtlle, 7:SO ] Uoliriumtiiwit,
1 Medicine liog, 7:1.1 I Deinondluiid.
| (inserter's Ju’n, 7:50 I Horneton -1 Thicket,
J Drunkard's Curve 5:0(1 ; ivcrli Owl Forest,
itowdyville, j Dismal .-wanip,
QuruTolvillo, lfobgol-ilnlVoods,
IsigMington. | Knit! - l,edgo,
j l’toody Gully I Dark Tmund,
I lJeouuoh Slough. Whirl: :nd Crossing,
I Kiil-couseionee Out, | Thundriland,
I t’lisonton, I Pi.;: k Valley,
j Beggarstown, Dead River, arrive at
I Pauper Desert, | DESTUUOTIOX at...
j Tickets sold at Liquor shops through
j the coun try. Daily patrons of the lv ad
I above Tippleton, supplied with through
j Tickets at reduced rates,
j From Drunkard’s Curve the train is an
| Express—all taking in being done above
that station, and principally of rospocta
i h’c people. Passengers for all places he
yon 1 are thrown out without stopping
the train.
Passengers not allowed to stand on
tho platform, or to put tlioir brads out
of tho windows below Rowdyvillc—the
corporation not wishing to alarm per
sons who are not patrons of tho Road.
Persons desiring to leave the train
will find the Stages of tho Temperance
Alliance at Drunkard’s Curve and all the
stations above ready to convey tliem
free to any of the villages upon the Cold
Stream River. Below Drunkard’s Curve
Ambulances will be used.
Persons living in the vicin’ty of this
Road must "look out for tho engine,’ as
no bell is rung or brakesmen employed
below Drunkard’s Curve, and the Compa
ny disclaim all responsibility for dun;a
.
All Baggage at (be risk of the owners
Widows aud Orphans in pursuit of bag
gage lost by friends on this Road, are
informed that tho Corporation will ad
here strictly to tho usages of tho Roan,
and positively will not restore lost bag
g i go.
Passengers in tho sleeping clrs espe
cially Stockholders, will be waked tip at
Screech Otvl Forest Thtinderlund and at
the end of the Road.
Stages from Tobaccoland connect with
all Trains.
NOTICE —At tho request of Superin
tendent Alcohol, there will boa Business
Meeting by and by, of the Stockholders
itud Conductors of the Road, to hear a
Report concerning.
Liabillics und<r the Tlir/her Land
By Order of
BEELZEBUB, President
MonF.it ate Drinker, Secretary.
STATEMENT OF Till BUSINESS OF
THE ROAD.
1. From accurate estimates carefully
made in the United States, it appears
that this ltoad is constantly carrying
over 300,000 persons, mostly young hi in
down to the condition of Common Drunk
ards.
2. If the families of drunkards aver- 1
age five persons, it carries untold misery i
and wretchedness directly to more Ilian |
1,500,000 persons, a largo portion o‘ |
whom arc women and children.
3. It keeps more than 200,000 in the
Aims House.
4. It keeps 75,000 ci iioinuis in Prison.
0. It is carrying towards destruction
multitudes of the brave and nobleyoupg
men in our army.
6. It lias carried d.wn to dl.-grase,
poverty and destruction, many of the
most talented men of the country, from
the Bar, the Bench, the Pulpit and the
Halls of Congress.
?. It carries more than 30,000 into
Eternity annually.
8. It carries more than 1,500,000,000
of Dollars lo Destruction. A distinguish
ed observer of facts says: “All ike
crimes on earth do not destroy so many
of the human race, nor alienate so much
propoi ly an Drunkenness.”
9 11 is prosecuting its terrible busi
ness against the laws of God and man,
and iu defiance of all authority. The
people of tin; United Stales according to
Commissioner Wells swallowed by re
tail in a singleyear $1,513,491,865 worth
of liquid pois m.
10. Its business is rapidly increasing.
There were recently living in a*small
town in Vermont four widows all eighty
i years old or more, all totally blind high
■ ly respected, and each tenderly eared
for by an unmarried daughter. One of
the quartette died last week.
; The ed tor of an lowa pa pet believes
I that any one man can start out and
| marry 20 women in his town before
! night.
A cireus elephant oot West was only
j calmed down by being shot several times
i and having one of his bind legs chopped
| for several m uutes with a tlm p hatch, t
[52.00 per Annum
NO. 25
OLD f-TORiES MADE NEW.
Tho pica of Mr. WhittennJore, argued
so'd is ae. tertut sly to his client Liy General
Butler, that the cadet money all went
to the poor, has revived the old story of
the miller who sometimes had crazy fits,
in which ho imagined himself to bo. the
Lord judging the world.
On these occasions lie would put ott a
paper crown, ascend a pile of meal bags
with great dignity aud call hts neigh -
bors in succession. The same ones wero
always judged;,and these were the mil
lers of I,is Vicinity.
The first one summoned was Hans
Scbimidt:
‘lTans Seimdt, stand opp-’
‘lians, vat is pea a your pishifess in
(i.-it odor world?’
‘I vas a miller, Oh Lort.’
‘Yus you a joost mon?’
‘Vol, vowoJo vater vas low, and. do
pishnesa Oli Lort, I sometimes
dukes a leetle extra doles.’
‘Vol Hans, you shall go over rnit to-
gotes, already yet
And so on in succession all were tried
and immediately sentenced to go over
to tbc goats.
L ist of all tho miller invariably tried
himself in the following style:
‘Yacop Miller, sthandoop.’
‘Yucob, vat was your pishness in do
odor world 1’
‘I vas a miller, Oh Lori.’
‘Van you always nj iost men, YncobP
‘Vel, Oh, L >rt, von do rater was a h e*
Ho low, and pishnesa vas pad, I sonde*
times dakes a leetle extra doles; but Oh
Lori, I all de vilcs gives does extra doles
to de poor.’
After a long pause, ‘Vel, Yacob Mi!-r
lor, you can,go otcr m.it de sheens—but
it von dam tight squeeze.’
The Shoctino Fish.-This very remark
able fish is a native of the East Indies.
Nature has constructed this aquatic
sp< rtsmau in a*vrry singular manner,
but one admirably adapted to his spor
ting predilections. Tin fish has a hol
low, cylindrical beak. lie frequents tiio
rivers of the sea shore in search of food
and from the usual manner iu which ho
provides for liis daily wants he derives
his na e. When this hungry gentle
man espies a fly or an insect not taking
due euro of himself lilt sitting on the
plants that grow iu »h illuiv water, ho
swims away to the distance of four or
five !' t that lie may tike aan at his
prey; and wheu ho"has dune so to Iris
satisfaction ho then, with am: zing dex
terity and cleverness ejecta out of his
tube like mouth one drop of water, which
is so well directed and sj swiftly shot
forth that it never fails to knock tho fly
into the water, and oiicu there, all hope
of escape is gone—the fish darts upon
his prey and eag- rly devours it ; thus
supplying us with another instance of
the diversfied modes by which nature.
qualifi: a its count! ss millions of crea
tures with the pnv r tier .-isary for pro
curing- food.
Electricity Rivals Ste'-.l— Anew in
vention isdeaeiibed in the into papers,
which substitutes electricity for steam
ns a mechanical power. The cost pet
day is estimated at thirty cents. Flail
ing machines and ether mechanical ar
r uigvmeut:s havo baon successfully at
j taghed to this v.-ondeiful electrical en
gine. If the machine now in corn-true
i lion in New York, works as beautiful On
Ia laige scale as its smaller predecessors
j nave a snip will soon pass over the ocean
| with a s'iealc of lame lightning in tiio
hold. This dangerous element appears
in tliis glued role in such a minute form
that it can he put in a smaller trunk
than is carried by a fashionable young
lady to a Rummer res rl. What next?
Two sable matrons we’re called up for
fighting in the Recorder’s Court iu New
Oilcans. ‘Why were yen fighting?’ in
quired the lb cord r. ‘Tljs woman lead
my blankets, and wouldn’t give them to
me,’ replied one of them. ‘Are those the
blankets?’ pointing; to a' bundle one of
them carried under !: r arm. ‘Yes sir.’
‘Howdid she come by them? ‘S': 1 carried
’em homo when ’my husband died of the
small-pox.’ ‘Small pox ! sinuli p ::!’
screamed the Court; ‘get out of bore!
Put them out!’
A now minister at New Bediorl to ik
a stroll before breakfast on the first Sun
day ho was there, and alter walking a
dozen blocks was accosted by a- shabby
looking citizen, who had been watching
*him, with, ‘You needn’t look any further
there ain’t ad— and saloon open.’
When theatrical ma uigetß make mon
ey they thank their stars fyr it.
A voice conies teen Vi ■ -’.mg'. ;I1 Tjr
ritory saying ‘Scad us wives. A thou
sand or more of virtuous, iodu.-trioas
a:rd good tempered young women arc
wanted as iie'pmates Ijf the lords of
creation. Tins region,’ the voice says,
'i 3 f utile, producing fifty bushels of
j wheat to the acre. Bit wh iI~S wheat
| without a wifi-. Iu out) county of me
I Territory alone there are bun hundred
j adult men and only twenty three women
| all told.’