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31 (Johann (Srcctcti to JFntt.
VERY FULL.
A slim spark bespoke a pair of pantaloons
at a French tailor’s “ to be sure,” said he “ to
make them very full” “Yes, sare, I under
stand you very well, tank you, sare, your
custom will make me to much honneur ” —
tendering him the homage of a profound bow.
When the pantaloons were brought home,
how was he disappointed to find them of the
same dimensions as his skin! He stamped,
he raved at the tailor and the whole French
nation, during which the poor tailor stood in
the utmost consternation. “Did I not give
you particular directions to make them large?”
“Large! large! no sare, you say full; and
suppose he is large , I believe he is very emp
ty”
TURN ABOUT.
Two Yankees were strolling in the woods
without arms in their possession, and observ
ing a bear ascending a tree with its large
paws, clasped around the trunk, one of them
ran forward and caught the bear’s paws, one
in each hand. He instantly bawled out to
his comrade :
“Jonathan, I say go home and bring me
something as fast as you can, till I kill the
varmint. Mind don’t stay, for I’m in a fix.”
Jonathan ran off as fast as he could, but
was an exceedingly long time returning. Du
ring the interval the bear made several despe
rate attempts to bite the hands which held it.
At length Jonathan returned.
“Halloo Jonathan, what the deuce has
kept you 1 ?”
Jonathan replied: “Well I’ll tell you,
when at home, breakfast was about ready,
and I guessed it would be as well to wait for
it.”
Here now, Jonathan, said his companion;
“come you and hold it, and I’ll kill the crit
ter in a jiffy.”
Jonathan seized the bear’s paws, and held
the animal w r hile the other could kill it.
“Well, Jonathan have you got him'?”
“I guess I have,” replied Jonathan.
“Very well hold him fast; I guess Til go
to dinner 1
HOEING COLLOQUY.
“Peter, Peter, I see a toad,” saida little
darky to his brother, one day as they were
digging over a heap of manure.
“Where am he Joe?’’
“Why, right dar, don’t you see ’im Pe
ter'?”
No, I doesn’t see ’im, strike him wid de
hoe.”
Joe hit the toad a crack, which brought Pe
ter to the ground.
“Oh! you fool Joe! dat was my toe. I
see’d dat all de time.”
IN ADVANCE OF THE MAIL!
A lady of New Haven gave birth a few
days since to twins—a boy and a girl. As
the little girl was the first to make her ap
pearance in this bustling world, the mother,
upon consultation with her friends, has come
to the conclusion to name her Telegraph, on
the grounds that she was in advance of the
male.
NO END TO IT.
“ Put it out a little further,” said a doctor
w r ho was examining the tongue of a female
patient. She complied. “A little further, if
you please”—she obeyed again. “Put it out
as far as possible madam.” “ Mercy, doctor,”
said she, “ you must think there is no end to
a woman’s tongue.”
LEGAL ATTENTIONS.
A legal gentleman who lately paid his ad
dresses to the daughter of a tradesman, was
forbidden the house on, which he sent a bill
of ninety-one pounds thirteen shillings and
four pence, for seventy-five attendances, vis
iting on family affairs.
“ Sam,” said a mother to one of her “ wer
ry obedient children” one day, “how many
logs have you sawed,, eh'?” Why, marm,
when I get this and three others done I’ll
have four.”
“Well it Did.” —“John how much did
your pig weigh?” “Well,‘it didn’t weigh as
much as I expected, and I always thought it
wouldn’t.”
Douglas Jerrold calls the law of Primo
geniture, a law of Cain—for it knocks down
the second son.
&BIF$& &iB 7 ®&8ISIF TS ♦
®l)c ©ark (Jorucr.
THE ORIGIN OF RIDDLES.
Some of our young readers may not be a
ware of the fabled connection of the monster
Sphynx, with what we call riddles; and we
will therefore occupy space enough to tell
them that she is supposed to have invented
them, and proposed for solution the following
question:
“ What animal is that w r hich goes upon lour
legs in the morning, upon two at noon, and
upon three at night'?” All who undertook to
solve this riddle and failed, were torn r to piec
es by her, and in this way many perished;
until (Epidus, a Theban prince, answered it
truly, as follows: “Man in his infancy, that
is the morning of life, creeps upon all-fours;
in the noon of his life, he walks upon two
feet; in the evening of his days he totters
with the aid of his crutch, making three legs.”
Mythology informs us that the Sphynx was
so enraged at the discovery of her riddle, that
she threw herself from a high rock and per
ished! We regret that we cannot give any
better or more reliable account of the inven
tion of riddles than this. It is certain, how
ever, that they were in use in very remote
times—as we have an account of a very in
genious one in the life of Sampson—recorded
in Judges, XIV chapter. The Greek girls,
we. are told by Plutarch, “ worked at netting
and sewing, while the more ingenious made
riddles.”
The antiquity of this amusement, not less
than the distinguished character of many who
have, in different ages of the world engaged
in it, are certainly warrant enough for our
devoting to it a portion of our columns week
ly, and w T e propose to offer the following—for
solution by our readers:
A man once launched a vessel large,
And live stock, too, he took in charge ;
He did not barter, buy nor sell,
Whichever wind blew pleased as well;
He sailed at random—was to no port bound—
And all he wanted was to run aground !
The following riddle is attributable to Cle
obulus, one of the seven wise men of Greece,
who lived nearly 600 years before the Chris
tian era. It is more remarkable for its an
tiquity than its obscurity.
There is a father with twice six sons; these
sons have thirty daughters a-piece, parti-col
ored—having one cheek wffiite and the other
black, who never see each other’s face nor live
above twenty-four hours.
For the Southern Literary Gazette.
A CHARADE.
I am a word of letters five,
Familiar to your hand;
Cut off my first, no man alive,
My influence can withstand !
ILiQijt for ti)e Dark Corner.
For the Southern Literary Gazette.
ANSWER TO CHANNING’S RIDDLE-
Cares rob their victim of his due repose,
Nor peace nor slumber his sad spirit knows ;
But add to cares a simple letter S,
You change their nature to a fond caress ;
Though cares are plural and of bitter taste,
S makes them singular and sweet in haste!
EPSILON.
ANSWER
To the Riddle in our last paper , entitled U A
Literary Character.”
A literary character you view.
Known to the moderns only— W :
I was physician to king YVilliam ;
When absent he would say, “ how —ill I am !”
In ancient days if I had lived the asp
Which poison'd Egypt’s queen, had been a —Wasp;
And the death-coolness ofth’ imperial arm
With life reviving had again been—Warm.
A friend to sprightHness, that neuter it
By sudden pow’r I’ve ebangod into a —Wit.
1 lie vainly-provident industrious ant
With cruel sport I oft reduce to—Want;
W hene’er I meet with an unlucky hack,
I give the creature a tremendous—Whack:
And many a time a puppy cries for help.
Jf I desert capriciously the—Whelp.
A friend to architecture, I turn all
(As quick as skilful builder®) into—Wall.
I’m honest, for whene’er I find some hose,
I seek the owner, loud exclaiming —Whose 1
Farther than Lancaster I educate,
My system’s always to interrogate;
Already have I taught my very hat
Questions of fact to ask, and cry out —Whatl
Questions of time my poultry, for the hen
Cackles chronology, enquiring—When I
My laundry’s labor I divide with ashes;
It is with them the laundress scours and —Washes:
And if an ugly rent I find, the hole
Instantly vanishes, becoming—Whole.
In short my, merits are so bright to view
How good soe’er you may be, just or true,
You can but halve my worth, for Iam —double you.
©nr Jorcign (Horrrsponkncr.
For the Southern Literary Gazette.
LONDON LETTERS-NO. IV.
London, May 16, 1848.
My Dear R. —As my protracted absence
from the Metropolis prevented me from wri
ting to you by the Hibernia , as you doubtless
expected, I will avail myself of the opportu
nity afforded me by the sailing of the United
Stales from Liverpool on the day after to
morrow, to send you my fourth letter for the
“Gazette.” By the way, if you have met
with no delay, the first number of your Jour
nal is now before the public, and I may hope
to receive a copy by the next Steamer. Well,
success to you in this enterprise, which cer
tainly deserves to succeed.
Exciting events are still occurring on the
Continent, and for the last twelve hours the
Londoners have been wondering over the
news of another revolution in Paris, which
has just taken place there. I must give you
a bird’s-eye view of the affair, as I glean it
from the daily Press. You know that a large
demonstration of the people was expected to
be made on the 15th, the ostensible purpose
of which was to express sympathy for Po
land, but it would seem that the National As
sembly, and many of the people of Paris, were
seriously apprehensive that it covered an ul
terior design, menacing the government, in
consequence of w 7 hich great excitement pre
vailed, and formidable military preparations
were made to pnotect the Chamber of the As
sembly. On Sunday, there were various pro
cessions of the Clubbists, and placards were
posted at different points; but it was not until
yesterday that the affair became serious; and
in the leading article of M. Girardin, in the
Presse , occurred these words: “The National
Assembly is warned : Polan# is the pretext,
but terror is the end.”
About 11 o’clock a mass of people, estima
ted generally at fifty thousand, marched to
the Chamber of the Assembly, and crowds of
them rushed in and mingled with the mem
bers, crowding the Hall. Consternation and
confusion ensued. The leaders of the mob
made speeches and proposed motions, which
were carried by acclamation. A Mr. Hubert
shouted out, “In the name of the people the
National Assembly is adjourned.” Measures
were then taken by the populace, to establish
anew provisional government ; and the spirit
and purposes of the anarchists may be determ
ined from the fact that'of the members named,
were Ledru Rollin, Blanqui, Louis Blanc and
Raspail. There was not one of the moderate
party.
The National Guard and the Gardes Mobile,
meanwhile, were summoned by the Assem
bly to drive out the populace. This they pro
ceeded to do with alacrity and unanimity, and
thus maintained the government, which would
otherwise have been as effectually overthrown
as the Orleans Dynasty a few weeks previous.
The mob was intimidated however, by the
spirited bearing of the troops, and rapidly dis
persed. The new “ Provisional Government”
was speedily arrested and imprisoned; and so
temporarily ended the emeute. It is almost
vain to speculate on the prospect before the
French people. That this is but “the begin
ning of the end,” I feel as confident as if I
could see the whole course of affairs. Apart
Irom this outbreak, of which many may be
expected, and which surprises nobody, the
complexion of French affairs is decidedly
gloomy. Even supposing the National As
sembly to maintain its existence against the
efforts of the “Clubbists” of every name,
what ground have we to hope for judicious
and effective legislation by that body? A
friend of mine was present at the opening
of the Assembly on the sth, and he tells me
that the scenes of the day would absolutely
beggar description ! Such a Deliberative As
sembly never before convened, for the grave
purpose of governing a vast nation. The
wildest confusion existed; several delegates
spoke or shouted together. Now a rush
from different quarters wohld be made, and a
dozen or score of the deputies seek to reach
the tribune at the same time. In the very
midst of important business, there was a mo
tion for adjournment, which created all this
confusion, pending which there was much
personal altercation. My friend says that
his seat in the gallery cost him a dollar, but
that the scene was so novel and extraordinary,
that he considers it cheap! All this is indic
ative of the unpreparedness of the French
people for the great work they have com
menced; and while I wish from my very heart
that Republican France may prosper and em
ulate our national example, I fear and believe
that such will not be the case. Lamartine’s
influence appears to have grown wonderfully
less in a week, and this is one of the ominous
“ signs of the times.” But nevertheless, let
us throw up our hats, and shout again, “ Vive
la Republique.”
The “Battle of Limerick” has afforded a
fine theme for the Charivari to exercise its wit
upon; and although Mitchell, O’Brien and
Meagher escaped with their lives from the
melee, there is a reason to fear that they will
yet be Punched to death. By the way,
speaking of “Punch,” that facetious gentle
man twits the French with making a very
unnecessary boast of the frequency of their
Revolutions and claims the palm for England,
instancing as proof of his claim, that a steam
boat descending the Thames broke some of
her machinery, but succeeded in making/owr
teen revolutions in a minute!
We have had some charming weather here;
and the city is thronged with the gay and
fashionable from all parts of the Kingdom.—
Theatres, Operas, Concert Rooms, Gardens,
and a thousand other places of amusement
and interest, not forgetting the Coliseum , are
in full operation and are crowded nightly.
I heard Jenny Lind the other night at the
Queen’s Theatre, and my opinion is that she
is incomparably the finest singer I ever list
ened to. Her voice possesses a ravishing
sweetness, and the expression of her face aids
greatly its effect. I would not like to be com
pelled to describe her singing. It is like the
sweetest, wildest, most impassioned strains
of your mocking-bird, with the additional
charm of a human face and intelligible lan
guage.
At the Coliseum I saw yesterday a grand
moon-iight panoramic exhibition of Paris,
painted on something like 50,000 feet of
canvass. I have not yet been in the gay
city, but I am told that the panorama, with its.
brilliantly lighted streets, and its ten thousand
details, affords the spectator an admirable idea
of Paris itself. I have not seen the “ Model
of Rome” at the Sussex Gardens though it is.
a great attraction.
The warmth of the weather fills the public
gardens, and creates a demand for ice. It
was really refreshing to see the other day a
huge block of Wenham Lake Ice gleaming
in the window of the company’s office in the
strand. You know, doubtless, that the “uni
versal Yankee nation” supplies the Metropo
lis with the greater part of all the ice it con
sumes. John Bull pretends not to like being
dependent upon Jonathan for his supplies, but
in this case he takes it very cooly!
Lord Brougham has laid himself open to
much ridicule by his application to the French
Provisional Government for citizenship, and