Newspaper Page Text
YOL. 11l
"tr :<i ;
Tlie Qoitfiiaa Reporter
IS I'Uni.ISHKI) KVKIIY TIH'IIKDAY 11Y
.TOW. r .l"I t.r.MAN, Pr>i>V.
U’liiltatS:
(me Year S:J ot>
Six Mentha | 1 O'l
Three Months "a
All subscriptions must he paid mvartr l.y
in advance no clisviiminiition in fitvcr m ,
anybody.
The paper will be -Hipped in nil martini-ex
t the expiration tp .hu time paid lor, unless
iubscrqAiourf are firevilmaly renewed.
RATES OE ADVEIitMIiG.
Vlv. \)' < ’. v ... i"*
par sciumm on* >ticH*■•for first inser
tion. and 75 cents for each subsequent in
sertion. . .
All 'lyfvef mtkA+fi ts snonld be marked for
a specified time, otherwise they will be
ohfffci|nndf tlw rule f so much tor the
first lhsirtion, and so much for each subse
quent. insertion.
Mandates, Obi.m a ties and Tributes of Ke
apeet wrll bo charged same rates as ordinary
advertisements.
U7//AY BiLLt AUK DUE.
Ail bills for advertising in this piper are
duo on the first appoaiince of the adv< rtiso
jlimit, except when otherwise, emincmd by
contract-, and will be presented when the
money is needed.
Dr. E. A. 1 ELKS,
Practicing Phy >ician.
QiITHAIN (*A.
Office: lJriok- butt/1 mg adjoining stor?
of Messrs. Briggs, Jclks & Cos., Screven
street. D-tf
S. T. K3XLKDEUY,
Attorney at Law,
QUITMAN, - - mOllO! A.
T’-'T OFFICE in new Brick Warehouse. "TVS,
Business before the U. S. Patent Office
I. A. Allbritton,
Attorney at Law,
QIITMAN, - GA.
SltT-GFFICK IX (.'Ot’UT HOOi’.ii. y
w. A. S. HUMPHREYS,
Attorney at Law,
QUITMAN, GEORGIA
.-7,9-OFFiqE in tlie Cmut House "SA
HADDOCK k li Ail-OKIE
Attorneys at I ,aw,
QMTM A GKO.
Will give prompt attention to all business
entrusted to their care.
Office t>ver Kavton's store.
Dr. J. S. N. Snow,
x> i-: isr t :r. s' t •
OFFICE —Front room up stairs over Kay
ton’s Store. Gas administered for painless
ly extracting teeth.
;* #•-Charges to suit the times.
jan 10, ly
R. H. Roiunson,
Pliysiciau and Surgeon
Having op nod an oftic" opposih the
Mclntosh House, in the building- formerly
occupied l*y Mrs. I Hack, offers lose rehas
to any who may call. Office hour- Irom 1)
to 12 .o’clock A. M, and from 2 to i e. M.
Quitman, (3a., Feb. 2, IK7O. :1m
Du. E. A. I elks. Du. ] Unity Xlabbktt.
Dias. JclksA Mabbett,
Having purchased the drug H'pni-tmont of
Messrs. J’riggs, Jclks A Cos., would respeet
fully notify their friends and tin- public. .
erdlv that they have just op-nod a NEW
DRUG STORE, in the house formerly occu
pied by JJr. .folks ns an offi • which they
have I‘onsideralily ‘enlarged, and arc now
supplied with a full and oomphh lock of
Drugs,
Patent Medicines,
Perfumeries,
Toilet Articles,
Oils, Paints
Window Glass,
Putty &(•., tSsC.
SVTTFF, Ac.
E. A. JERKS & lURKY MABBETT.
7-'em
STATE m:\YS.
H ' , * • " 1 ?■’ ill U.Lf -
j IVmtillugs mill ffj;; -springs from
our ExrJutugw.
-This unplna saint truth is from
Imp S iViuniflh A ; -' A gentleman
; remarked yesterday tin- if ho were in
.Sow York and mot un e.m migrant
! who Wanted to came to Savannah to
1 w rk for the people Inire ho would
say to him, “don’t no.” If yon vUtni
.to bet. work from th-' Savannah peo
ple yon slay at tin- North and they
wil send it to y Ml.” - n-rein a groat
>l-d of truth in this s', -a Stic remark.
v aoemakers cann-t- p- v rcutnf their
• indl'U.ls se- 1 .. . In i ; hues. and
this sententious truism will apply to
taylors, drv goods men, carpet men,
| furniture dealers, cUdommt (/tinis.
Wo would remark that the rule don’t
! apply to daily newspapers and baker’s
! bread, an these ne.assirv articles of
civilization, furnish food for the stom
ach and the head, must be fresh. If
j they could he kept long enough it.
j may be assumed many of our people
would send North for them. A la
vorite pastime is to write North and
put some friend to the trouble of buy
ing something for you (for which you
pay a good cash price), then to go to'
a store on Congress or Broughton
streets and pick it out for yourself. Is
this trot a palpable truth, and does
not the fact impress upon you the
c nviction that to this cutis; is attril
utable, in a great measure, the incon
venience occasioned by the “hard
times,” of which there is such general
complaint.”
—Tim Atlanta Constitution publish
es the following:
Wo are in possession oi the follow
ing circular letter which is being sent
out to Hfldicals in alt the counties ol
the State. The design of the thing I
may be readily seen, and ,va are free
to suggest that there may be virtue in
the movement. Suppose the Demo
cratic State Central Committee opens i
the limit and secures such a list from
1866 to the present time ? Me should
like to see ii prepared. It would pro
duce another ease of “iiie engineer
hoist with his own petar-J.” Here is
the document, with its suggestions,
and questions:
“.Savannah, Gy.. May 1, 1870.
“Snt: I wish to obtain *.! -• full
particu!:-.rs of nay defalcations that
have , ssiu 110 l -I. s og.V-- COU lltv e
January Ist, 180’I, by national, State,
count', or t-e.rri officials. 1 hope and
believe tlii ■ util prove ! i neficiul to
our parly, juid therefor-.: urge v;uu to .
an.3l.er iiio mnowi’ig queminns, and
send to me by mail at your earliest
convenience.
“Very respectfully,
“David Pon-rmi.
“Hits there In cu utiy official de
faulter in your county ? Give name
of county; if any defaulter. give name
of nnmen: office held; politics-,, lie
publican or Democratic; amount of
defalcation; punishment iutkefed;
amount ri funded, if any ; any other
information regarding it; give your
liiimo and post office address.”
\Vo sincerely trust that David will
publish the list, without garbling, so
soon as he can fully make it up.
—The annual Horticultural and
Floral Fair of the South Georgia V.
A M. Association at Thpmasville will
be held on the 2tith ins'., and will ba
il umoronsly attended by the guberna
torial candidates.
The Baiubrirlgn firemen had their
eighth annual purude and jubilee last
week.
—Thirteen while men and nine ne
groes will represent Georgia in the
National Republican convention at
Cincinnati.
—(I. AY. Adair, u real estate agent
in Atlanta, has written a letter of ad
vice to the people of the North and
Northwest, who are thinking of emi
grating to Georgia, and in that letter
he has drawn a line from (kiiunihu
to Augusta, taking in Macon, ami
says south of that line it is dangerous
for them (the proposed new Metiers,
to think of going to, on account of
unheulthfulucsu of the climate.
Whereupon ('apt. Weston <>f the A1
bany X'tr.t goes on to cl ally demon
strate that Mr. Adair is ignorant of
the health reports and statistics of!
the State, and knows not whereof lie
writes.
The Columbus Tinu's of the 11th
says: About 10 o’clock yesterday the
Grand Jury came in the Superior
Court with a true bill against Roy.
(?.).* 0. A. Kendrick for seduction.
Iteese Crawford, Esq., one of the
counsel for the. prosecution, then ask
ed his honor to assess a bond, ns they
(the prosecution) did not care toko
troubled about a writ of halm* tvrpiu.
Ex-Judge William,'., olio of the coun
sel for the defense, said that he hoped
his Honor would not deem it necessa
ry to asses a bond then, as it would
come before bis Honor sooner or la
ter. They (tho defense) did not think
of slicing a writ of habi’n x corpus, nor
intend to offer a bond. The bond
was not assessed. Judge Crawford
said that ho would sit up >u the case
at any time that the defense uiglit
•■■li to give bond. A bench warrant
drick. This proven.s'fit! upon Ken
foro Judge Crawford if he should
ferbuud.
OUITMAN, OA., TIHJ IIS DA Y, 31A V IS, IS7R.
A .Matrimonial Incident.
Two nice old people, mmi and wife,
sat in the Detroit and Milwaukee de
pot, tlie other day, having come from
Canada, and waiting to go further
West. Shu called him “George” as
she ordered him to look ands: eif that
one-handed satchel was safe, and he
eallcdiher “Dolley” as he reported that
that 'ere satclu-l was a■; safe as If spiked
to a tree. By-iuul-by he wanted to
smoke, and lie went out and lit bis
pipe and strolled into a barber shop.
I.eft alone in a strung" tmtn. the wife
became nervous are! fidgety after a
few piiuntes, and walking over to it se
rious-lo'-kiiig chap win sat reading a
paper-covered -novel entitled. “The
Bushwhacker's sho-nsked:
“Yo id ut ti !.’• -!i" ! Aiy husband
has got lost, do yon ‘ ”
“Is yonr husband of phlegmatic dis
position, in dam V” he asked in reply.
She looked at him in a puzzled way,
and than hesitatingly sard :
“HeY good*ip;l lived, rnd I never
heard him swvai*, Vpt the time when
I forgot and left his boots in the ov
en.”
“Are your conjugal ties still ten
der ?” he asked.
“I’m Ins lawful w'fy’ she replied,
looking rather indignant.
"Yes, yes, I know; bat perhaps your
husbanu has cogent reasons for desir- ■
ing 1 o sever liis conjugal lies.”
"Jngal what V" Sic iltked.
‘■Hasn't iGu-cnrred to you, uunlaine,
that your husband may have run
n.va;, ?”
“Good gracious, no !”
“It has To me. i was studying both
of you before he went out. I saw that
he was of phlegmatic teniperanieui,
while you are vivacious.”
“(iood land !
“Yes, ma’am. 1 saw him looking
at you as you were looking at the lads
who tends "the eating st.iud. 1 could
almost lo ad his thoughts. 1 saw him
sigh. A look of deep; at sorrow crossed
hk face. I saw him draw away from
vou, as if your presence via , disagreea
ble.”
“V, ,n did
“Ami I saw him elevate hi.: nose.”
“Did he stick up bis nose at me ?”
“Yes, in. las he passed me going
out I heard him whispering to him
self: 'i i! leave the old jade and hunt
me up a blooming wife.” Imu sorry
for you, ma'am."
“You lieediit’the.” she slowly suit.,
draw- n her am iu.ilfewa-tiutibat-
V’o:-- • .f. in." A . :v. p, ,' AA. '
stuck op In ■ nos , eii ? And ne kinder
drew oft. eh V ( idled mo an old, jade,
did he V ’
' Ir Is a 3.1-1 o : isr, iret’anin'-' .. "nAiencd
the stranger, i. hesav her e ves snup
ping, “but of course you e,..n i -do any
thing about it.
“I can’t, eh ’:' she replied as s’.h
began stacking up the bugg ige.
"No, uuidiui. All you can do is to’
pawn your jewi nv, s li y our bag
gage, and return h me.'
“.Stranger, will you keep an eye on'
them thing'sV” she as.ied, jiointing to
llie baggage.
“1 will, inn am, bull be-;, you will
tnku.niy Hclviee.* Yon don't want to
make a public scan la!, do >ou ':
“Watch then) thing.-i," sit.- said,
waving her hand, and she went out
upon the street.
Nothing was t .ha see!) of “i ieorged’
She started uj the street, looking very
j pale around the mo„th. H, sat iu
the window ,-!’ tli • harbor shop, smok
! ing a why and reading- a neg ro minstrel
programme. She saw him as site
j was walking post., and site soft!y slid
i.i and bad him by the haa\before he
ijoked up.
‘\V hat oa earth - 1 Jolley- -,Do!ley V
lie veiled, in his sudden surprise.
I “Yes, it s your old jade !” s!ie hissed,
! trying to get holt with the other hand,
| too.
“Wind's this -who—bold on 1” he
exclaimed.
“For de Bawd's sake ! What’s nil
dis v are mean : ’ c.dhd to barber.
“Found that young and blooming
! wit' vet V she. . see i.'d, h aiding his
; head against the wall.
“What wife--wliat ails ye- -are ye
crazy V” he yelled.
“Now, dew stop dis v.-r bludshod
or I’ll cad out de police ! ’ added the
barber, waving his lather-brush
around.
“Sneeked in here in hopes I’d go did
von V” , emarki and the wife.
‘•Woman, are you mad ?” asked the
man.
“If she linin' done gone crazv tu a
fox, lien l never seed a ’proinis i” put
in the barber
‘-George” returned to the depot
I with her. 'Tho baggage was there,
lint the man with the novel wasn’t.
George sat.down and see beside him,
and in reply to his i xpk-.nation she
pressed her lips and said:
“Yon set, right where you are or
there’ll be hrookcu bones 1”
“But, Dolly -’’
“You lot Dollv alone! We’ll be
alone bitnebv, and you'd better get
ready to shive!”
The stranger was a mean man.
“Dolly” will never believe there wasn't
! something iu it.
j Juwobll- -.in s iv.s he would jump out
! of a two story window to make Blaine
president-and out i a three story
' window to mal e Ui'a.l.ow prtJsideut.
The Worcester Fre suggests making
. it “Bristow uud,Blaine. ’ so as to have
the judge jump, out eJ, a live story
window. Tho Herald goes ouokeUi ;
by asking the jinky-i! Upit ■ on-, story
i u i {[.-iyflie diilvrenco in la: : estimate
Ilurringc! Aiuout? tin' Choctaws
From tUc Clbyvuuv bcader. J
’.£Sio.lndians talk little-underuny
circumstances. Thus it i* naturally
supposed that when a young fellow
dons his best < which is generally sot.
off with a calico lilous- , having large,
limning slocvos, an t his hut stuck
fill! of feathers, with two or three
yards of scarlet iihlxui hanging down
his back,) lie would be about speech
less by the time he arrives at the “old
man’s” maiteioa. After dismounting
from his pony he takes his p< dfitui on
the i'eiicn, ajui sits thorn until ho gees
his fair 0110 at U- - door, when lie
grins audibly, and., she dueth like
wise, he takes it foi gi uitnd Unit be w
welcome and goe-w^,... . tho house
which generally consists of one room
ami comaius all 'the family; and
therein he has to make his speech,
which at the furthest ariiona'ts to
three grunts, lfis success depends
very much upon an invitation to
smoke bn the father of. the courted ;
lass. If the "old man " has auv re
spect for him, lie ligh ts bis pipe, and,
after taking a whiff) bauds it to the
young mail, who in turn takes a
whiff, and so they proceed, wbill'j
about. The length of time they:
smoke depends altogether on the es
teem too lather has for the beau. Af
ter a icrtuia number of such visi l s he
filially musters up courage enough to
say, “Che-fe-ha-hadi-de-ht-it-uui-ini'f”
Which meins in English, “Will you
have me ?” If she says “Ky vo,” which
means “No,” he takes himself off. If
she gives a gruut, the prej jurat ions
are made.
On the day appointed for the wed
• ding the groom arrives on a pony,
amt lending another that has a side
saddle for the bride. On arriving at
the house, without dismounting, he
fastens her pony to the fence, and
then rides of! a short distance in the
direction they are to go. Shortly tile
bride steps out, dressed in the height
of fashion—a new calico die s, a
handkerchief around the neck, and a
large red one tied over her head and
ears, and a pair of new shoes across
her arms, which he puts on just be
fore lv.iebing the parsons. As soon
as she mounts her pony the man
starts mi, and she follows from fifty
to two hundred yards behind. On
arriving at the parsonage be gets oil,
ties ins hi rso and goes into the h -use
and makes his business known. By
this time the lady arrives. ,:k.mounts,
-ill-.. j- V II . . -. .y -- - '-yi---
k i"; ■:<?, leans herseli on sue side of it
; near the door, and naiieutly waits
till someone discovers 1 r and bids
: her enter. All things being in read
iness, tne minister, \\h ■is us ually a
white missionary, motions tho couple
to stand up, and performs the cere
mony in English, which is about as
intelligible to them as Greek; bijt
i wln-a the minister .slops ‘talking they
; depart, leaving the poor clergy man
without fee or thanks. Tk y usually
go to the husband's parents ami stay
about a year before attempting the
uni on, duties of house-keeping. Af
ter getting married a Choctaw does
as they do in Indiana; that is, if lie
doesn’t like the squaw, he gets a di
vorce, which is granted on the most
frivolous p- etext.
Errors in Printing.
Probably one of the worst business
es under trio sun is that of a punter.
His every deed seeks the light of day.
Turn e of tho lawyer lie iu dark boxes
nud between dusty shelves; tie-doe-■
tor places his indifferent handiwork
in the grave; the tradesman has hut
his customer to please and satisfy
when his work is on-.led, but the prin
ter every ignoramu ; pells over the
work of a printer.
Fellows who would fiud it impossi
ble to put twenty letters together
grammatically will point out with 1
glee a fault iu his work —indeed, it is
usually this class of individuals who’
make it a j oiut of finding out, every
little discrepancy. Did the public
know the thousands of different char
acters, dillereut letters and atoms
comprised in a printer's every day
life did they know tho variety of al
together foreign subjects he has to
set up, read, coma*, and revise day
alder any they would wonder how he
kept out of the lunatic asylum. But
practice makes perfect and constant i
friction has rubbed off all the roily/
edges from tho character of the man
of letters nothing takes effect upon
him -he can view errors of the most
frightful description with calmness.
After all, what is an error, grammat
ically or otherwise? Simply so many
atoms out of place, that is all, and
quite enough—but not enough to up
set the equanimity of the printer.
He Wastkd Mow-: IV.t-rt.T - “Ala,’
said a Chicago hoy, the other day,
“I wish you’d make my pockets big
gcr.”
“Wliat can my little son want of
larger pockets V’ remarked the moth
er.
“Weft, yon see, mil,” replied the
innocent lamb, “the hew groerryman
on the corner keeps lots and slathers
of nice, things round in front, nn’ lie
ain’t no hand at all to watch ’em. - ’
Then that good mtether, taking off
her slipper, communed with her young
offspring upon the sinfiUiies,-t of his
plans.
Baid a Brooklyn school raiss to her
i-ompi-nion tile other day: “Oil, join
cur church ! There isn’t a man or wo
man in it that there Isn’t some gossip
u. scandal about .’
The Sweet Potato Crop.
Dr. H. A. Swas.-y, editor of tlit
j N Hi/iicrn Montgomery.
; Ala., talks directly to the point in the
] following article:
We very muon doubt that there is,
in the whole natal igno of Southern
! crops, n single ouo that.is more prof
: i table than the sweet potato.; i'.von
in the Middle and NortUwcstn'ij
Status, it is one of the indispensable
1 elements of successful farming -here,
jit is emphatically one of the roe i/uu
i ion*, and we have been - urpiisod to
sue bow subordinate it has generally
beorn kept in the prevailing system of
: Si nthi-ru 'husbandry.
iii Ikatrlanii, great stress i- laid ym
llieir turnip crop, t i which t has heen
said by one ot tlleir wise.-!, vtate.-anen
(hat tho British nation could hotter
dispense with iis navy than its tur
nips. Iu the North, both tho turnip
mid Irish potato crops are a main lu
liaiicfo-is a winter feed -without them,
shop, hogs and people wliould have
but n sorry time of it during those
long, dreary months v, In n they are
completely shut out from all other
green forage. \\ e have, hundreds of
li lues, heard Southern tanners regret
that they could not raise turnips arid
Irish potatoes hero as ihoy do iu I hose
more favored (?) climates of the
North and Marope sighing for a
shadow win a the -ilhsiai . . li at
their feet. To those woo have fully
tested the respective value of those
various root crops, the question uf the
superiority ot the sweet potato over
the other two is no longer a debata
ble on--. Found for pound, the sweet
potato is far more valuable ior all
feeding purposes tUuu the Irish pota
to, and immeasurable so than the
turnip. All stock are especially loud
of it, and thrive upon it as they do
upon no oth'-r green food. Where
other root crops derive their eh a. 1 nu
tritive qualities from the si area they
contain, and which, before assimila
tion, must bo •converted into sugar,
the sweet potato contains the sugar
itself, thus tanking the digestive or
gans t.o a far 1 s degree than in iho
ease of almost imv oilier food. Mo tal
as we a?- - eolicerne 1, we would not,
exchange our sweet potatoes for eh
the Irish potatoe. i u-i.ips ami sug tr
beets they an- :- > seii-laudatory over
both in iinrone and the- North--acre
for acre we can. ii rib S u ken crop,
beat trieim two ; r one iu all the nu
tritive eh a■; . not ;
crop, the sweat pot ito should rup< r
sede the staples already in cumtva
tion, but we speak of it as a home
crop to be used on the farm or sold
iu near local markets, for the • pur
poses it is certainly unrtvaleJ m prof
it an well as in facilities for general
production. N>r is if ; i/coora:. mar
ket value a matter to be wholly ig
nored. The i,.,.reusing demand for
the oai'lv vegetable p-roductieuis of
tile South that lias sprung up iu the
Northwest- within the las', lew years
leis made an opening for the sweet
potato crop that has largely mere-us
ed its profit to the producer. Tor the
last two or three years i;n.:rh of the
early clop leas been diippe and t North
ern markets, and tbs has had the ef
fect to greatly enhance the price to
homo Consumers. East year the price
for good table qualities ranged from
$2 to per bushel, even as lute as
tlih firs' of October, and nil fhron di
the fall and winter they were tar
above tk; > old time pric .
AYlnm we take into c nisideration
the fact that e-n poor piny woods
lands over eOO km. dels to the :u-i-(-
have been Hi --ed- in one recorded in
stance ovhr JdO! -we ' can easily * o
how imniens -ly profitable if may i
-a even hi) ;a . -J - r bus! cl
We toil and struggle at least tee
ruonfhV to get a cotton crop into mar
ket, that”after all nets us jiorliaps.
where everything is favorable; ten
dollars pier aero profit, and neglect a
crop that occupies* us not one-halt
tlie time and yields us double the in
come !
Brother farmers',” think of these
tilings and rni-li over a ufrw leaf in
favor of those crops that pay best,
even if they arc n little les.-s aristocrat
ic..
Tim liinj.oi-- mi. Fkhioii. -She wore
around hat upon the biu-k of her
head like the aureole of a s: inf. to
whom her sweet, hie- gave her tho ap
pearance of kindred, lfor bodice was
close lifting--Hide J, drawn tight
about the. waist, like'dm bark of a
young tender tree. Her scant skirl
pulled tight in front so as to show
her form, and tied-back, terminated
behind in a short hut-lbko tail, li/ e
the tail of a’ mermaid. She was
mounted on shoes seieii sizes too
small for her feet -indeed, only her
toes appeared to have accommoda
tion in them; and the high In (Is com
ing under tlm instep tlel her fer
war-land complete ;i the grace of i.or
carriage. Allien she walked eho put
down one little foes after the oilier as
if euch h-g were as e!a Jin nn an ikon
rod. li was a great ] Unißiire to see her
pepping along, it thing of perfect beim
ty,ii/rc some of tjio .drawing;, qfsume
my tlnilogical biped by one of the old
masters. - fluiil'of I i.'iia.-.
A movt-im nt is on foot to i -it .hh h a
fottf-ifi'-hirn ; fit ~ h liae t 6 ritli lS
tween New Yovit tend 'pi’s', delphiii
during tlm coming se,u.;rt.i: Twelve
couches and at least, sixty hoi;-es w ill
hckuiiinred, a; a I-Oet for flm fa foil
of twenty thousand deJKis. Tk.e. rtili
ning time, would be s' ->ni ten b>>urs,
and the charge .-.'.mi d511... : ; -r -..
c
Tho SJout Woman Tlml. „ Ever
l.ivctt.
LH'i-nm th. i’liilajelpiiiii Bulletin;
YY.’ have doubts about the follow
ing Mon- which Conu s to us from the
interior; but the author is responsi
ble for what ha say.-:, and liis mime
can he .obtained upon application at
tliiri office.
L ist winjer two of tuy neighbors,
Mr. Miller and Mr. fit ant, lost theii
wives up .11 tpe same day, and both of
. the funerals took place, three days
-rib rwurd. , the iutcruient being nuulo
at the cemetery about the same hour.
As th - two funeral parties were com
ing - out of the burying ground Miller
me Grant, ami clasping each otlver’s
a,.i 1 they indulged in vmpath*ic
.squeeze, and tho following couversa
isalion ensued:
Miller- Tin sorry for you. I’fs tin
un 'louknblo loss, isn't it?
Grant Awwful! She was tho host
I woman that ever lived.
Miller She .vs-: indeed. I Jievcr
met her equal. :e was a good wife
to me
Giant I was referring to my
"ife.- Tlieio couldn’t he tim best you
know.
Alillei' Yes, I know. I know well
enough that youv wife couldn't hold a
candle to mine!
Grant Sheeouldn’f, hey? (,'ouldn’t
hold a candle? Yv by, she could dunce
dl around .Mrs. Miller every day in
the week, including Sundays, and not
half try! She was an, unmitigated
! angel, take her any way yon would.
-Miller- Oh, she was, was she?
\\ ell, i ilon t like to he persona), but
if ! ovvne 1 a cross-eyed angel with red
! hair and no teeth, and as bony as an
: omnibus horse, I'd kill her it she didn't
die -..! her own accord. Dance! How
could a woman dance that had feet
like candle boxes arid lame, at that?
Grant- Better be cross-eyed tuan
fveav ihe kin.: fa red nose thatyour
v.’iie doiiTikhe!--gr und til’s communi
ty. i bet i’ll burn a hole through
;be Colliei lid. And you pretend vou re
sony sh v-s ! But you ian t im-
V v on mi. I know you’re so glad
you can hardly bold in. She was the
ohnckle-headedes! woman that ever
and: or. .1 a gvavt-vr.i: that's what she
wm.
' 1 i l l -1 U’ you ni,us. my wife ITi
knock you down.
6lilt- - I’d like to see yon try it.
I uen ih. t , dioeousolate widow
iu _ ll;r ■ u.l - u***—
0.. - , : i : - ..ig awhile in the
v"v the ia. ur.e-rs pulled them apart
1 jus* as a r r. .'l<lh.-r was about to insist
up" : hi . wife’s virtue by biting off
Mr. Grant’s nose.
' n tie y got hone Afr. Grant
t; 1 cn i ■ tipoit all Ins wimtinv-slrat
le.s to show liow deeply lie mourn
ed. and ; s Mr. Miller knew his grief
for Mrs. Mill: r was deeper, he not
only and. corn ted his shutters, but he
fixed live yards of black bombazine
on tin.- la k-pui! and dressed his whole
f.uedy In mourning. Then Grant de
termined that his duty to the depart
ed "a- m . to M himself he beathn by
a man v.ho e aildn t feel any genuine
sorrow, so he .. :v e i a black flag on
he ilg i. I rtg Ii and e.uucd the
front of Ids ias: .. u itfi black alpaca.
The:-! Miftcr Imcaihe excited, and
he ex; 1 1 I,i : sens 'of bercuvment
by pan.ting his dwelling black and bv
put.ing - . launuincut to Mrs. Mil
ler in his front yard. Grant there
upon staii,, J his yellow horse with
lampblack, tied crape to his cow’s
horn, daubed his dog with ink. and
l eg: ato v. ,pe .jo las- e on a Idas!,
tiuudkm -chief. As soon as Miller saw
tin p: c; edings Is: spread a layer
of charcoal all'over his front yard; he
issiimed ti black shi:t; he corked the
faces of hi family when they went to
church, u;id. ho juled a colored man
. ltd ; u iii.s steps and cry for
twelve hours every day. Just ns Grant
war: .about to see this am! go It one
ketier he encountered Miss Tang,-a
,'iuing lady from tho city, and in a
couple of weeks they were engaged.
! I;en lip. la an to take in tho evi
dence of iiis grief, and this made Mil
ler so mad that ho went around and
propose I to Alias .Tones, an old maid,
who nev, i-had anofTei- before. She :e
--eepted him on the spot, and they
win. inaiTind the day before Grant's
wedding, which so disgusted him
that lie \v ,ui-.l have given up Lang if
she hadn't threatened him with a suit
for breach <■* promise. 'There is jieace
be ween (he two families, but when
-ill’s. Miiiei gets on the rampage
sometimes Mr. Alik-, r mur.njs for his
* 1 rat wife more than ever.
tiV.m i.im. Nnvi.v I’lim-k!) Tnuns.
There are times when water is al
most, essential, but it is best to avoid
it if possible. Tu many cases trees
arc injure, 1 more by the kind hand
.inkling tho wafer-potthan they would
be by full exposure to the dry weath
er. If;: newly planted tree showed
signs of -vitlrs ing- its leaves on ttic
least warn weather, we should most
likely cut off a few of its branches,
which would lessen the evaporate
sari,mo. if it titi’.l seemed, to buffer,
choose a dry day to loosen the
earth' on flic surface about if,
to -i n say half an inch, and tliTu with
a ramrod uiihTeTcifiilly punch .and
pound it. This will so thorngbly
pulv nze the soil that, it will attract
moisture from the sniroutidinp
groin and. if, alter all, Ihe lent cs do not
wear.a aspect, make,’ft sha!-
10-. v basin about ti e roots’, ami poiii
ii n Intciieifnl iirtiv,, of water, and n
I i- ao i'oMowiiig fill it again with
and o .iff pa J. it-In. dog)
- a will ,! j for .. hok-'.ixmun.
i'evls from the Talmud.
If thv wife be steal], bond down to
her uni speak to her; do nothing with
out lmr advice.
liven thing iu life can be replaced)
the wife of earlv days is irreplacea
ble.
An b iiorablc mini honors bis wife
n contemptible one desptseth her.
tlii- loss of a first wifi) is like the
i oi ii man' , sanctuary in his lifo'
; time.
If a man divorce his wife, fills altar
itself sheds tear* over him.
Mail and wito well malehed
havo h,aveibs glory as their, com
panion; mini mid woman ill mat ch
id an- encircled by a 'tlevoimng
fire. • • • • •
Bat!, r V -j* vtniu Imrtsauhe;
rathev any evil than ftnjevit wife.l
lie who lovetu his wife,like hipji
jt'U'; u:io leadeth his sous and lint
daughters hi the path of integrity,
and who provides for their siittMc-i
meut in early life: to him may be ap
plied the .Scripture passage, “Thou
slmlt know that peace shall adorn thy
tent.”
A man w: > fakes a wrfo for tho'
sake of her money resits ill behaved
children.
Ho who [Harries a woman conge
nial to himself ,s loved by the Al
mighty.
When a iiKiiffldsiMh his wife, flic
world around him growctli dark, tho
light, in Ins lent is dim, and the light
before Lim is extinguished.
A Hkkulsi:. At Mendota, 111., Inst
week. Mr. \an J>..r,-u and wife had
gone out. to spend tin' CyoJiing with
a neighbor, leaving' file younger chil
dren in charge of their older sister,
Kate, who is about sixteen years old.
Mr. and Mrs. Van Doreu had- hardlv
departed when .some scoundrel, hav
ing his face masked, entered the house
and asked if Mr Yah Porch was in.
When answered in tho negative he
presented a pistol at the bead of Miss
Van Duron and demanded what mon
ey then: was iu the house. He said
he knew that Van Daren had money,
and ho wanted it. The girl displayed
great coolness, and told tho villain
that if her pa had any men - y it iau-V
be in his bedroom, and il lie would
wait whore he was she would go and
get it for him. He said that was too
thin, and followed her in to the bed
room. first putting bis pistol in his
pocket, anticipating no trouble from
..sunn ;l young vs : gsii.i n-...1—>. —.l. e.
.-CO in th S’- C'M-ii.TT.-rnit*")’*' >m a rifhi
cane belonging to her fe.ther, which
she seized anil immediately pointed
at the rascal, aid told liiui to leave.
When she pointed the cane at him lio
ejaculated, “Hc-11! a ritlo cane! You
are a prefly girl!” and commenced to
back out of the room, Miss Fan Do
ren endeavoring to set the trigger of
tlie rill j, which she failed to do owing
to her excitement. She backed tho
coward clear out of the bouse. As
as he had got c-lcaT of the prem
ises he started to run. For one so
young Miss Van Dorc-u has certainly
displayed a degree ol courage hardly
over excelled
It was a Scotch woman who said
, that a butcher of lu-r town only killed
half a Least at a time. It was a
Dutchman who said that a • ig had no
his.cars except a . hurt tail. It was a,
British magistrate who, being tolcl by
a v-tgabon that he was not married;
responded. “That u :i good thing for
your wife. ' Jt v.se-. an i:,ng>Ji r. por
ter who.stated at a meeting of tlm
Ethnological there were casts
f r ill.' : hull of- n in.l:\idnitl nt dif
perent periods of adult life, To show
he changes produeed in ten years,
though Dean Swift certainly men
tions two skull > era crvcl iu Xgc]aud,
one of a per on win :i he was n bv,
and the other of the i-cnrie person
when he grew to be a man. It was
a Portuguese Mayor who enumerated
among the marks by which the body
of a drowned man in'-ght To identified
when found, “a marked imp, diincut
in his speech.” It was a Fre n ennui ti,
the famous Cnrlino, who eontented.lv
laying his head upon a luy.- stone jai
lor a pillow, inquire 1 A t van not
rather hard, “Not i t luvu
stuffed it with hay.” T . . ~n Ameri
can lecturer who leci- lv ..:i and omi
ev, n ng. “ Far, *s m ne’ - havo chil
dren, or if not, your daughters may
have.
Non . ri-• 'Tun: to AV im:v, vSirs-A
As tile time lor wiiitcwashing, has
arrived, the following receipt for mak
ing the wash, iecmnmeudod liy the
’ fiwut'j-- ,f 1 n'T. lied. It
answers for brick, wood nr stone:
“.Slake about one half ' bushel nn
hiked lime witlyhoiliug water, keep
ing it covered during the process.
Strain it add a peck of salt dissolved
in warm water, three pounds of boiled
rice put in boiling wntirmd boiled
to a thin paste, one-half pound of
-'pani.-ii v.lnling, and one pound dear
glue di .s, Ived ; u warm water. Alice,
.tipr-o well togetlu-r, aiitl let tho uii.xtr
ure stand for several and iris. Keep the
wash thus prepared in a kettle or
portable furnace, find when used put
it on hot as possible-with either paint
ers’ or whitewash .brushes.
Tlm euapnencemeut senuou of Em
qry college wUI be preached on Sun
day, July, loth, by Bishop Pierce.
'Tiie Junior exliihifioK'will take plnco
on Tuesday, Ji.lA Pdf), and tho Soph
omore prizes will be delivered bv
Hou. 11. V. AI. Miller, 'j be alumni
address will by delivered ou Tuesday
by Pei .J. \\. Heidi. On AVednes
day, flip’oration before tho litefld-y
societies by Rev. A. AY. Wilson, of
Washington City.
No. 12.