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YEAR WITHOUT A SUMMER. REJtARKABLtt WKATHKIt SOMK 07 VliAllS A4O. The Siorv of the I'henoMennl Weoiher Ihnl Followed a Cold >j iliir In IHIG. Daring a cold spring, liko that which is just now drawing to au end, people generally console themselves with tbo reflection that tho sun will eventually get tho victory, and that summer will certainly come at last, though its coming may be delayed. Uncertain as tho weather is, the general features of the seasons recur with a regularity which warrants the confidence thus repeat'd in the annual return of sect! time aud har vest; hut thcro arc instancea on record in which even the s 'asona seem to have lost their characteristic features, as if the ordinary laws of meteorology had been temporarily suspended. A remark able case of this kind, and one which the long-continued eo. l weather of this spring makes particularly interesting just now, is that of the year 181(1, which has been called "the year without n sum mer.” A communication printed in the Congrryalionalist gives the following summary of the weather of this remark aide year: January and February were mild; March was cold; April began warm, but ended in snow and ice. lee formed an inch thick iu Slav, and fields were planted over and over again till it was ton late to replant, June was the cold est ever known in this latitude; frost and ice were common. Almost every green thing was killed; fruit nearly all de stroyed. Snow fell to the depth of ten inches in Vermont, seven in Maine, three 11 the interior of New York and also in Massachusetts. There were a few warm days. It was celled a dry season. But little rain fell. Tho wind blew steadily Imm the north, cold and fierce. Moth ers knit extra socks and mittens for the children in tho soring, and woodpiles that usually di.wip|anrcd during tho warm spell in front of the houses were speedily built up again. Planting and shivering ,cro done together, and the farmers who worked out their taxes on h i country null wire overcoats and iiiitteus. In a town in Vermont a flock of sheep belonging to a farmer had been sent as usual to He ir pasture. On the 17th of Juno aln vy snow fell iu New England. The col 1 was intense. \ furniar w ho had a largo field of com in Tewksbury, built fires around it at night to ward off tile frost; many an evening he and his neighbors took turns watching them, lie was rewarded with the only crop of corn in tho neighbor hood. (lous'd r. 1!o damage was done in New Orleans i:i consequence of the rapid rise of the Mississippi Thver. Fears were entei Iri.ied that the sun was cooling off, and throughout New England all picnios wore strictly prohibited. July was accompanied with frost and ice. Indian corn was nearly all de stoyod; some favorably situated fields escaped. August was more cheerless, if possible, th.m the summer months which preceded i f . fee was formed half an inch in thickness. Indian corn was so frozen that th ivat r part was cut down and dried for fodder. Almost every green thin;: was destroyed in this country and in Eii ■ pe. On the 30th snow fell at I! met, forty miles from London. Vm tile corn ripened in New England u i . the Middle States Farmers supplied themselves from corn produced in 1815 for seed in the spring of 1817. It soil at from 81 to $5 i:r bushel. September furnished about two weeks of the pleasantest weather of the season, but in the latter part of the month ice formed an inch thick. October had more than its share of cold weather. November was cold and snowy. Decem ber was comfortable, and the winter fol lowing was mild. Very little vegetation was matured in the Eastern and Middl • CHIU**, me suns rays seemed to la destitute#%eat during the summer ; all nature was clad in a sable hue ; and mei exhibited no littlo anxiety concerning the future of this life. The average price of flour during the year in the New York market was 813 per barrel. The average price of wheat in England was 37 shillings per quarter. Bread riots occurred throughout Gnat Britain iu 1817, in consequence of the high price of the staff of life. A Terrible Experience. A bridal night experience almost sur passing in tragic horror that of tho bride of Lnmmermor, which Scott said was "an ower true tale,” is reported from Rio Grande del Hur, near the Uruguay frontier. A young farmer’s marriage was postponed on account of his being hi! ten by a dog. The wound was cau terized, and all went well. Three months later doctors declared all danger over. The marriage took place. A supper followed, and at supper the bridegroom was noticed to fall into gloomy abstrac tion. After supper camo dancing, and when the ball was at its height the bride and bridegroom withdrew. About an hour later piercing screams came from the bridal chamber. Tho door was burst open. On the floor lay the bride, still alive, but torn as though by a wild beast The bridegroom, covered with blood and foaming at the mouth, cowered hi a cor ner, but in a moment sprang upon one of the men, when a brother of the bride sent a bullet through his brain. The Nihilists. A correspondent writes that the declaration made by the accused at the recent Nihilist trials may be thus summed up: “It is a grave erroi to regard us as mere anarchists, or nihi lists, without a political platform, and with no other aim than to Rill and de sirov. It is not so at all. We are mon archists, hut we desire a constitutional monarchy, not a despotism. We ask ourselves hv what right are we forbidden to think and speak freely; by what right docs despotism reign in Russia ? It has HO right sayg the right oi might.’ (tljc (Dnjcttc. VOL. X NEVER THE TIME AND THE PLACE Never the time amt the place And (lie loved one all together! This path - how soft to pave ! This May—wbat magic weather! Where is the loved one’s face? In a dream, that loved one’s face meets mine. But the house is narrow, tho place is bleak Where, outside, rain and wind combine. With a furtive ear. if I strive to speak, With a hostile eye at my flushing cheek, With a malice that maska each word, each sign ! O, enemy sly and serpentine, Uncoil thee from t lie waking man! Bo I behold tho past Tims Arm and fast, Vet doubt if the future hold I can? This path, so soft to pace, shall lead Thro’ the magic of May to herself indeed f Or narrow if needs tic house must be, Outside are the storm and strangers ; we— Oh. close, safe, warm, sleep I and she, —I and she. Bbowkixo. DID HE LOVE HER ? Georgette was horn with a silver spoon iu her mouth; indeed, if I mistake not, it wns a gold spoon, richly encrusted with jewels and hearing in its bowl a monstrous lump of good fortune. In the first place, she was one of the loveliest girls I ever saw, both in stall and laxly. Her beauty was of a dark, mag nificent type, which suggested to me the diminutive name of “Jet,” by which 1 always called her. She was barely twenty, and heiress—it fairly takes my breath away to write it heiress to JCOO,OOO, li ft her by her uncle, a German of high rank, hut sin gularly destitute of kindred. Georgette's mother hod 1 wen an Ameri can girl who had mot young Rudolph Schubert during a summer tour in the Rhineland. They had married against tho wishes of Rudolph's family, who were greatly shocked at w hat they regarded as a /)<:- ■.aUinnt r. It was only after the lapse of years, when death seemed striving to ex terminate tlie Schuberts, that the old Herr Uncle, as lie was railed, opened his heart to the orphan child of his dead brother. Georgette had lieen horn in the United States, anil she was an American to the heart's core. I remember having thought -that afternoon when we sat out on the lawn together under the pink awning— that there wasn’t the slightest trace of her father’s nationality about her. She was sitting in a camp-chair with a bit of delicate embroidery in her hands. There was a table near by on which high tea” was to be served when Ralph Dealing and his mother arrived. Jet had invited them; hut I should have known they were coming if she had not told me, for when did her eyes ever shine so brightly, or when were her cheeks so rich a crimson, as when this penniless barrister was near at hand? Yes, Georgette was in love with him ; I saw it very plainly, and it male mo uneasy. If I had only lx-en sure of Ralph Dealing it wouldn’t have bothered me an instant. But though it seemed most unlikely that lie should not love her, I was haunted by a mortal fear that her money had something to do with his devotion. Loving Jet, as only a solitary old maid knows how to love, it was torture to me to think of my darling as the victim to the grovelling passion of a mercenary man. I had never hinted to her the drift of my thoughts, but I had made up my mind to do so, and I tried it that afternoon. Jet opened the way for me, just as though she had known what I meant to say. “ Emily,” she said, “what would you say if I were to get married ? ” “ God bless you,” I an overed prompt ly. “That is, of course, provided the match was all that it should he.” “ What—what doyoti—think of Ralph Dealing?" She was I lending low over her work, hut I saw that she was blushing. “Are you going to marry him, Jet?” I asked quickly. “No—o— that is—l don’t know. To tell the truth, he hasn’t asked me. But I thinks he means to." “Of course. ’’ “If he were to, what would you do about it?” “I looked up in ouprise, for I knew that she loved him with her whole generous soul. “I think I would try to find out his motive,” I said bluntly. “He loves me—at least he has told me so,” she answered softly. “And— and I think I can trust him !” “He told you he loved you, and yet went no further !” 1 cried. “That was unmanly, Jet; I hope you did not listen to him.” She blushed still more deeply. "He would ask me if he dared,” she said, defending him not only by words but by expression. "But he—he thinks —I know he feels there is a difference in our positions.” “Decidedly,” I said laconically, for what she had told me gave me a very unfortunate impression. “Ho is very proud and sensitive,” she added, and would have said more, but I took her hand aud spoke to her with great gravity. “Jet,” I said tenderly, “you know that I have no other wish than to see you happy. Forgive me, then, if what I say wounds you, but I cannot help feel ing that Ralph Hearing may have thought quite as much of your fortune a of yourself.” , “Do you know,” she Baid, with a little SUMMERVILLE, GEORGIA. WEDNESDAY EVENING, JULY 11. IBBR. catch in her breath, “that has troubled me, too. It would kill me if I wore to find it out." “No.” I answered; "not unless you found it out too late to avert the conse quences.” "But I could not give him up," she cried. “I wish I were poor, then I would know whether ho loved me for myself.” The tours started in her eyes, and her red lips quivered. “Hush!" I said warniugly. "They are coming—Mr. Hearing and his moth er, Jet.” Blie regained her composure iu au iu slant. When she gave her hand to Ralph her face was wreathed in tmiles. He looked so handsome that afternoon that I would have given anything to have been able to trust him. Within the sound of his musical voice some of my doubts did vanish and, knowing that he had to go away on the morrow, f had the grace to beguile his mother indoors, while he and Jet went down to tho lake after water-lilies— at least that is what they said they wore going for. “I can hardly realize that I am going away to-morrow," he said, with au audible tremor in his voice. “I wish there was no occasion for me to do so. I suppose it’s an old story to you, Miss Georgette, to hear a man say that he would like to spend his life iu your society?” “I have heard it before,” she said slowly; “hut I have not believed it always." His face flushed for an instant, and ho made a sudden gesture, hut he hit his lip a moment after and turned his head away. “You know that I lovo you,” ho said, in a low tone. “When Igo away to morrow, I will leave all my happiness behind me.” “One never knows when tolielieveyou men,” Georgette said with affected care lessness. “ I suppose it doesn’t make much dif ference whether you believe us or not,” he answered in a piqued tone. - “ Excuse mo,” she said quickly, “ but it makes all the difference iu the world to me—more difference, infinitely more than it evor could make to another wo man.” “ How?” Bhe paused a moment. “My position is so peculiar,” slio said presently. “If I accepted in good faith any protestations that might he made to me, I would ho called upon to subject them to a trying ordeal—-a test of sin cerity perhaps stronger than they could Ix'iir. ” “ You may” “ As for you, Mr. Hearing,” she inter rupted hastily, “ I know of old your gal lant speeches, so I do not take them for more than they are meant. But fancy my position if some day I wero to take a man at his word and entangle him in a matrimonial engagement I Perhaps you did not know, Mr. Hearing, that my un cle only bequeathed his fortune to me conditionally? If I marry an American it is to revert to a distant cousin. My uncle was bent upon mo having a Ger man husband, and if I married a for eigner I was to forfeit my inheritance.” Ralph Dealing had paled suddenly, and lie caught at tho branch of a tall shrub as though ho sought its support. “What a very absurd proposition?” ho exclaimed. “It is no wonder, Miss Schubert, that you have resisted the pleading of so many suitors. A fortune like yours is not to be thrown away for a passing fancy. I was not aware that you held it conditionally. If I were only a German nobleman, now! But, alius! I am only a poor barrister and u free-born American.” He laughed ; lmt there was something in his voice that made Georgette’s heart strings vibrate with pain. He did not know, and she would not have had him know, that her money would have! icon as nothing in the bal ance against his lovo had she only been sure of it. “Shall wo go out on tho lake?” he asked, changing the subject so quickly that her heart gave a despairing quiver. It was only her money, then, after all, that he had courted so assiduously. “No,” she answered, shivering slight ly. “I think it is too damp this even ing. Besides, the lilies are closing. I will get some in the morning.” When they came into the house I saw by her face that something had hap pened. That night, after Ralph and his moth er had gone, she came into my room and said simply ; “There is no room for doubt. I have weighed him iu the balance and found him wanting.” Three days later she received a letter from Ralph Hearing, from Which this is all extract; “ I love you with my whole heart, Georgette; but I am neither foolish nor selfish enough to ask yon to marry me when l know what you would sacrifice liy so doing. “At first I was afraid to ask you be cause 1 feared you might misconstrue my motives, and my love for you caused me to shrink from the imputation that might have fallen upon me. “Then when I learned that by marry ing me you wolud loso the fortune you were horn to enjoy, I saw how wrong it would be for me to expect or ask it, though that you would for one moment listen to my suit is nothing more limn presumption on my part." She gave mo this with a sarcastic smile. “What does he mean about your losing your fortune?" I asked when I lmd read it. " I told him that mv uncle’s will was made iu my favor conditionally, and that if I failed to marry a German I would forfeit my fortune.” “ You never told me that! ” I cried. "No? I uover enrod to speak of it. 1 cannot bear to have questions of in terest and matrimony so closely con nected.” “Rut," I ventured to observe, “in that ease it would Imvc boon folly for you to marry Ralph Hearing. He has his mother to support, and ho hasn’t a penny in the world.” “Do you think I would have cared for that! ” she said, with a passionate hurst of tears. “If he had loved me f would have gone with him to the ends of the earth and lived upon bread aud water. ” 1 laid my hand gently an her glossy hair. “ 1 tear little Jet! ’’ I murmured, and I felt that I could have killed Ralph Hearing. Three months passed and there earn* a change—oh, such a change! -in Georgette. Hhe had born ill, and I hough the doctor said she hod pratically re covered, sho did not seem to gain a par tide of strength from dny to day. 11 was with terrible agony that I saw al last that if there were not a speedy im provement her days on earth wore num bered. One morning when we were out driv ing under the doctor’s orders she re quested to ho taken to tho office of Mr. Fa pshaw. “ I am going to make my will, Emily,” she said calmly, and I could not answer her. When wo called at tho lawyer’s office we were shown into the little room where ti gentleman was seated writing. It was too lute to retreat when I saw that it was Ralph Hearing. He greeted ns affably, hut I saw a look of horror on his face as ho noted Jet’s altered appearance. “ Mr. Fanslmw is in his privato office, Miss Behulx'rt,” he sail!, opening the door for her; “ walk iu.” “ I will call vim presently/' she said, ami then left mo alone with Ralph Deni ing. As tho door domed after her ho turned quickly ami strode toward me, grasping me fiercely by the arm. “What is the matter with her?” hi asked iu a bourse voice. I shook off Ins hand rudely anil answered with great bitterness : “ A broken heart, Mr. Hearing.” I could not refrain from saying il, though r knew Jet would be augry. “ What do you mean?” He seemed to be choking with his own words. “Ought you to ask such a question ?” I said pointedly. “For God’s sake !” he cried passion atolv, “have, done with this. You know you saw that I loved her- worshiped the ground sho trod on. I would give my life for her this instant. What is the matter, Miss Emily?" “Do you mean what you say, Ralph Hearing?” “As heaven is above us, I do.” “Then,” I said joyously, “it is all a hideous misunderstanding. Georgette loves you. It is that that is killing her.” If ever a face was transfigured with rupture, his woh that, instant. “Are you telling me the truth?” ho cried. "Yes, J am,” I answered; “hut gi away before sho names out; she, cannot bear to see you now. I will prepare her for your coming to-night.” He obeyed me, anil it was not until evening that Jet saw him in hor own little sitting-room. When she, came in, looking so frail, yet so lovely, Ralph could not utter a word. He simply opened his arms, and the next instant her bead was on liis breast. “Darling,” he whispered, “I told yon the truth. Your fortune was nothing to me; but how could I ask you to give it up for the sake of sharing my poverty ?” “Your poverty was nothing to me,” she said, in a voice that thrilled with happiness; “but you never gave me a chance of saying so.” “And will you—can you—oh, Georg ette, my darling ! it will be a terrible sacrifice !” “You say so?" sho cried reproach fully, “yet you profess to lovo mol Tell me, Ralph, if it were ten times as much, would not you give it up gladly if you wero in my position?” “Dearest,” he said, kissing her with tender reverence, “I would give up tho world for you !” “Besides,” she added, with an en chanting smile. “I told a white"lie, Ralph. Canyon forgive me for it? I was trying to weigh your love in the balance with my money, and how sadly I miscalculated the result! But—it is only half of my fortune that I forfeit in marrying you. I think we can still manage to live on half. Don’t you think we can, Ralph ? ” He looked at her in a kind of delirium. “ What what” lie stammered. “Don’t you understand?” she said putting both her arms around his nock, “ When I marry you I lose half my for tune, but there is still a goodly portion left to me. I would not have any of it, though, Ralph, if 1 had to live without you.” Real tears started to his eyes and he gathered her close to his heart. Win ■ti 1 came in after awhile Jot was seated on the sofa and ho was sealed dose beside hor. Her cheeks were crimson and her eyes shone like still's. “I don’t know what the doctor will ay to this," I said, shaking my head du biously. “We won 1 need any doel-or now, Miss Emily,” Ralph said with a joyous laugh. “ I have taken the eoiftract off his hands.” Ho fulfilled it, too; three months later, whoa Jet was married her health was better than it had ever boon before. The inscription in her wedding-ring was in Hebrew, and somewhat different from the judgment which Belshazzar saw written on tho wall. It signified iu our language ; “Thou hast been weighed in the bal and found true.” What lie Meant. In a suit before a Detroit Justice tho other day the defendant desired to prove that his financial standing was solid, and when his witness had taken the stand and testified that the defendant enjoyed the reputation of promptly pay ing his debts, the opposing counsel naked: “Mr. Blank, you say you consider Mr. White perfectly good?” “Yes, sir.” “If lie owed you 850 you’d expect to receive it when due ?” “Yes, sir.” “If 1m should ask you for tho loiiu of 825 you’d hand it right out?” “Y-yes, sir.” “Very well -very well. Mr. White, ask the witness for a loan of 825.” ‘Mr. Blank, loan me tho sum named,” said the defendant, as he reached out his hand. Mr. Blank grow red and pale by turns, hitched around like a hoy on a carpet tack, and finally replied: “What I meant to say was that I’d lend you 825 on a first mortgage on about 82,000 worth of r< al estate ! Make nut your papers I"— Detroit Free. Ficus. The Nature of Dipflicria. Dr. H. C. Wood, professor vf experi mental pathology in the University of Pennsylvania, a member of the commis sion appointed by tho United States Government to make researches into the nature of diptheria, after h iving spent several years in the work, recently gave the results of his investigation in a lec ture in Pennsylvania. He mild that dip theria, croup and gangrene are identical diseases; that diptheria is liy no means limited to what wo see in the pharynx; as any abraded surface may be trans formed with a genuine case of diptheria, that it is a local and not a constitutional disease; that any sore throat may become dipthcritic without any contagion; that dipthoritic poison injected into tho blood is perfectly harmless, it first being nec cssiry to make a wound and keep it in a state of irritation before dipthcritic poi son introduced into it could produce tho desired effect; that tho disease abounds ii low, swampy places; that diptheria u..rl micrococci, minute vogolahle fungi, are inseparably associated “no micro cocci, no diptheria”—said the doctor; that the dipthoritic poison cannot affect a healthy person; thoro must bo an abraded surface, and no healthy child can get it unless it has a sore throat al ready; that, in his opinion, micrococci do not produce the initial lesion; that any sore throat may end in diptheria, and the line cannot ho drawn where sore throat ends and diptheria begins; aud finally, that diptheria is a spontaneous disease, and not infectious, strictly speaking. An Indian View or While Politics. In an illustrated article on the Fran ciscan Missions of California, in the June Century, one effect of white exam ple upon tho Indian is described thus: “In a curious pamphlet left by one of the old friars, Father Boscana, is told a droll story of the logical inferences some of them drew from the political situa tions among their supposed betters. It wns a band of Ban Diego Indians. When they heard that tho Spanish viceroy in the city of Mexico had been killed, and a Mexican made emperor in his place, they forthwith made a great feast, burned up their chief, and elected anew one in his stead. To the stringent ro proofs of tho horrible friars they made answer: ‘Have you not done the samo in Mexico? You say ysur king was not good, and you killed him. Well, our eaptian was not good, and we burned him. If tho new one turns out had, wo will burn him, too,’ —a memorable in stance of the superiority of example to precept. ” A young city fellow, diTK.- ed in a fault less suit and a pair of shoes that tapered to a point in the most modern style, was visiting in a rural district. A bright little boy looked him all over until his eyes rested on tin ■ shoes. Ho looked at his own chubby feet and then at his visitor’s, and then looking up, said: “Mister, is njl your toes cut off but ono? Louise Me Journal, NO 25. THE MII.K MERCHANT. An liualei-ii ruble lll. n l.lvr llmikny In li. A young Moslem Arab from the Gulf of Persia, came to Bombay to make his fort-uno. Ho engaged in llm ancient trade of selling milk. Now, London or Melbourne, Bombay or New York, ns far as the sale of milk is concerned, is the sumo place. Our Moslem friend, af ter saving his morning prayers and bowing devoutodly to tho East, relig iously watered his milk, putting in as much water as there was milk. By dint of perseverance, frugal living, devout praying, and watering tho milk, 1m accu mulated fifty Turkish, or say English, pounds. lie then resolved to return to his native Arabia Felix, buy goats and sheep and live happily. Changing his money into gold, ho secreted his little bag of treasure about him, and went on hoard ono of tho many native Arab crafts that ply between Bombay aud the Gull of Persia. The happy young Arab oc casionally wont to a lonely placo on the craft, told and retold his treasure, play fully tossed his savings up in the air, caught thorn again, and felt himself in an earthly Paradise. Now, thoro hljfiponed to lie a playful but mischievous monkey on board, the pet of tho Arab captain and his crew. This littlo imp had often observed the young Arab’s occupation, and felt an irresistible desire to have a littlo play with tho coin. Watching his opportun ity, tho monkey snatched the littlo hug of gold from the unlucky Arab, and ran with it, where no ono could easily get at him, to tho top gallant mast head. The frantic cries of tho Arab brought tho whole orew to his aid. But alas I the monkey kept tossing the coin in the air, and, not able to catch it, it either fell overboard or on deck. At last the monkey got tired of tossing the coin, and dropped the hag with hut a few sovereigns in it. After a diligent search the unfortunate Arab found that all hie earthly wealth had dwindled down to just half its original amount. The other half had been tossed overboard liy the monkey. With streaming eyes and a heart bowed down in sorrow, the Aral) turned his head to tho East and said: “Oh ! Allah, all thy ways are just. An hour ago my whole worldly posses sion was exactly the combination of hull milk and half water. Thy retribution h i., overtaken me. What was repre h.mted by milk I still have, and what was represented ,by water has gone back to water. Blessed is the name of Allah !” Oil Region Reminiscences. When Roberts’s glycerine factory at Titusville, I’enn., blow up, away back somewhere in the up-crook excitement of I lie sixties, a hole was left in tho ground large enough to bury tho largest church in Youngstown, O. Tho shock prostrated pedestrians who wore two miles distant, and the report was plainly heard forty miles away. It will never be known just what caused the accident, as the fom’ workmen wore never found. The most remarkable feature of this ex plosion was this: Every loose or semi buried pebble and rock that lay in the fields surrounding the factory was lifted from its resting place and shifted exactly eight inches eastward. I u the year 1878 a nitro-glycorinn mag azine exploded near Bradford, Penn., and to this day it is not known whether five men or seven were killed. In those days “moon-lighters” abounded, and as they did ail their work undercover of darkness in order to keep screened from the eyes of Roberts’s paid “spotters,’ they bought their glycerine in the night timo. One night a couple of gentry thought they would steal enough glycer ine to “shoot" a well, and they repaired to the above mentioned magazine on Tuna Creek. They tried to burst the door by exploding a small portion of the stuff in the lock, but from some cause the explosion did not take place. While they were still at work trying to burglar ize tho place, one of tho ownors of the magazine and several other men came along. As they advanced tho would-be burglars retreated, and in a minute or two the explosion occurred, probably on account of the action of the key in the lock that bail been filled with tho explo sive material. A few scraps of flesh wero found, hut nothing that would give any clow to the identity of the unfortu nate parties. A day or two afterward the trunk of a man’s body was found 300 yards away, beyond a hill seven hundred feet high, showing that tho body had been carried up into the air probably n thousand feet, falling at the other side of the mountain. There wero several men missing about that timo, but tho exact number that perished was never determined. a double discount. The Richmond, Va., Religious Her ald, say: We heard Brother Holmes of Savannah, Git., tell a good joke on a Richmond hotel man. He said that, when Dr. Price, of Wales, was attending our June meetings, some years ago, he slopped at Ford’s Hotel, and when he asked for his hill, Ford said: “Wo knock off half the price, as you are a minister.” Dr. Price thanked him, and asked: “ What do you take off for edi tor i? ’’ “ One half for editors, too,” was the prompt reply. “Well,” continued the doctor. “I am editor as well as preacher; so I am entitled to two halves, and Ihus my account is settled.” The hotel man laughed and let it go : o. I WIT AM) WISDOM. Tire roason men sucoood who mind their own business, is boenuso thoro/s so littlo oomjiotition. A oiiKST in a St. Albans hotel was ob served trying to pick up tho wick of an unsatisfactory gas burner. An bxohanob says: “What is iu a name?” Well, ask your bank directors to discount your note aud you will find out. Ik you ask a bald-headed man how he would prefer to he upholstered, lie’ll likely express a desire for mo’-liair on the top of his head. “ I’m saddest when I sing,” lamented tho poet, but if ho could liavo sung foi 85,000 a night he would probably have been saddest when ho oouliln’t sing. “ I love that man with all my heart," said a Philadelphia girl, “hut the trouble is that if T answer yes everybody will say that I married for money. He ih mi editor.” Colorado is judged in tho East by its bonanza kings. Bother! “Wo think so littlo of tliom here," says tho Denver Tribune, “that we send them to the Senate.” "Win 1 are politicians always talking about the party platform, my dear ?” queried Mrs. Rattler of her husband. “Looking for tho‘deals,’ my love," re joined Rattler. “Ann you any relation to my sister? He blushed and stammered, until llm young lady, taking pity on him, solved the matter by saying: “No, but lin’d like to he—wouldn’t you, Alfred ?” “Kind words cost nothing and go a long distance." Wo know a letter eon taining a few that went from Now York to Philadelphia, and then camo hack to tlio sender’s wifo and caused a divorce unit. “ Tun last word ’’ is tho most danger oils of infernal machines; and tho hits hand and wifo should no more light to got it than they would struggle for the possession of a lighted bombshell. Douglas Jerrold. An article in a Chicago paper is headed, “Kissed by hor husband.” A Chicago man who has read it writes us that although it is rhetorically a lino piece of work tho effect is spoiloil by its utter lack of probability. It is feared that tho great Brooklyn Bridge will ho n failure because the footpath is in the middle, and the Amer ican citizen is thus deprived of tho pleas lire of leaning over tho outer railing and spitting on tho ferryboats. "Beo pardon, sir, hut could—hie you tell me which is tho opposito side of the street?” “Why, that side, sir” (pointing across). “Mosli oblish, I was sever there jus’ now, and asked ’nother gem’l’n which wins opps’ sido, an’ ho said this was.” A congressman's wife wont to tho Sergeant-at Arms of the Senate, just be fore Congress adjourned, and hogged for one of the Senator's desks. Bright sent her to the “property-man,” who has a perfect furniture store down in tho collar somewhere. To him said tho persistent “Mrs. Representative”: “I want a Sena tor’s desk ; I want to send it home and have it put in the library to surprise my husband when he goes hack. You see,” sho added in a hurst of confidence, see ing that tlie furniture man didn't look particularly cross, “wo go out on the 411 ■ of March, and xve want to get as much out of it as possible.” She didn’t get that desk. A Day Dream liifcrru Tho cry of “Roiul I road!” caused a business man to jump aside just in timo to avoid being run down liy a sled ill one of the city suburbs. The boys'wero making the most of the snow. As the weary man picked his way carefully up the slippery ascent recollections begar to crowd upon his mind of tho time when he was owner of a sled which could pass anything on tho hill. Tho lines of care iu his face began to relax as the symmetry of the proportions oMliat sled and the name cut on the bottom hoard with au old jacknife loomed up through the intervening years. Then there came into his mind another pic ture of a girl, xvhose bine scarf matched the color of her eyes, and the rose of whose complexion deepened a littlo as she picked up her skirts and sat timidly down upon the sled. He remembered what he said: “You needn’t he afraid, Noll; she’ll hold a ton !” The weight of that little hand upon nis shoulder still has power to stir his pulses. As the iron-shod runners shot swiftly over the snow the grasp tight ened and an arm was thrown around his neck with a little cry of alarm. Tho sled was now speeding liko a greyhound, and swaying from side to side. Another arm was thrown around his neck, and he heard her cry in affright: “O—h—h! sto—op h- e—-r, John!” The agonized entreaty failed to influ ence him, as he was satisfied with the condition of affairs, and only when the bottom of the hill was readied was tho willing prisoner released. Then the walk up tho hill in tho moonlight, with the eager and nipping air echoing with the merry laughter and shouts of his com panions. Perhaps as the moon slipped under a cloud— The feet of tho day dreamer wore sud denly knocked from under him at this point, anil as he assumed a sitting pos ture lie heard the derisive shout: “Old duffer, why don’t you keep out of the road ?” A Newspaper’s Money.— The Nash ville (Tenn.) American has got itself into trouble with a young lady of Ala bama, by profession, as described in her bill of complaint, “ a reciter and reader of selections from standard authors and a tragedienne in dramatic scenes.” It seems that the American ridiculed her public performances aud described hor as a Bmall woman with a tremendous nose and very homely. For all of which and more she sues the American for 825,000 damages. The American ex plains that the eriticisms were contained in letters from its correspondents in New Orleans and Mobile, and that one of these correspondents is a lady, and the American, while it would not presume to venture an opinion about a lady's per sonal appearance, would never, under any circumstances, have interfered with the divine right of one woman to speak her mind upon the personal and mental claims of another.