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HEWING MACHINES
1 30 UNION SQUARE NEWYORK
O A\CAg o 5 LA 'VA,
ILL MASS. GA.
FOR SALE DY
PH A I f R <fc CAIX.
SUMMERVILLE, GA. _____
'aU N ™
HiehAkm
□avis
The lightest running Shuttle Sewing
Machine ever produced, combining
greatest simplicity, durability and
speed. It is adapted to a greater va
riety of practical and fancy work than
any other. No basting ever requir- d.
For particulars as to prices. &c„ and
for any desired information, address
THE DAVIS SEWING MACHINE CO.,
WATERTOWN, N. Y.
158 Tremor t St., Boston, Mass.
1223 Chestnut St., Philadelphia, Pa.
1 IB Publio Square, Cleveland. Ohio.
46, 48 & 50 Jackson St., Chicag ,UL
For sale in Snnunerville bj
J. 8. CLEGHORN Jt CO.
alabastinl
A Superior Substitute
for Kalsomine, etc
Alabastincis the first and only prep:.: i
made from c>lcined gi|isum rock, (<»;■
cation to v.-il’.: with n brush. nnd i; It. <•
eoats as des.re.l. one over anoUi'.T, to any
hard surface, «illiout danger of seal’,,.:
noticeably adding to the thieknes; o: in
wall, which is strengthened and improve i : -v
each additional coat, from time lo tinu*. It.
is the only material fur the purpose not de
pendent upon glue for Ils atlliesivenen.
Al diustltic is hardened on the wall by age.
moisture, etc., while all kalsomines or whit
ening preparations have inert soft elialk.-
und glue for their base, which are rendered
null or scaled in a very short tint’'.
In addition U> the above advantages.
Alabastine is less cxpeii.-in-. : s it requires
tmt one-half the number of pounds to cover
the same nmoant of surface with two coats,
Is ready fur use by adding water, and easily
applied bj »ny one.
I’o. de by your Paint Dealer. Ask fur
Co n! r containing Samples of 12 lints,
inaimlaelured only by the At.vßAsrtM. t 0..
• 15 Cftna ti. Manager. Grand Itaoi.ls Mi< lr
* PURE vd
PAINTS
ReadyForUse
Olives, Terra Cottas and all the latest
fashionable shades for
CITY COUNTRY OR SEASIDE.
Warranted durable and permanent.
Descriptive Lists, showing 32 actual
shades, sent on application.
For sale by the principal dealers,
wholesale and retail, throughout the
country.
Ask for them and take no others.
BILLINGS, TAYLOR & GO.
CLEVELAND, OHIO.
HEED or SINKING FUNDS.
Last spring several Indiana farmers
took stock in a gas company in one of
the towns, and all were present at a
meeting at which the active officers were
elected. In outlining the policy of the
company the president made an estimate
of the expenses and income, and sug
gested that all the surplus for the first
two years be turned into the sinking
fund.
“Mr. President,” said one of the farm
er stockholders, “what’s the use of that?
I bored for salt and lost S9OO. I bored
for ile aid lost as much more. I took
the contract on that county ditch and
sunk over SSOO. I’ve been a sinking my
funds until I’m dead broke, and I sug
gest that any surplus we may have l
used to pay off the debts.”- Wa'l St rtf t
New*.
@ljc 3‘nmmermlle ©njcttc.
VOL XI. SUMMERVILLE. GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY EVENING, NOVEMBER 26, 1884. NO. 45.
=— SANDS' —•
PATENT TRIPLE
sMOTIONggI
The only Freezer ever made having three distinct
motions inside the can, thereby, of course, produc
ing finer and smoother Cream than any other
freezer on the market.
300,000 in use. Catalogue and Price List
Hailed upon application.
WHITE MOUNTAIN FREEZER CO.,
NASHUA, N. H.
Tidy and Feilile.
Mr. A. W. Cheever, during his sum
mer travels, found “a two-acre farm in
New York State,” which he describes as
“a perfect gem in its way,” and lie gives
some notes of the means employed to
keep it fertile and clean, which may help
others who, even under the discouraging
condition of adjacent land foul with
troublesome forms of vegetation, are
striving to “till the earth in obedience
to scriptural commands ” :
“We looked it all over without find
ing weeds either in cultivated ground,
lawn, hay field or orchard. The two
acres are occupied by a dwelling house,
barn, and other buildings, all in good
repair, and covered more or less by vines
producing fruit or flowers. A wirefenoe
marks the division between it and a
neighbor’s pasture. Apple trees enough
to bear two hundred bushels of fruit
occupy a row at one side. An orchard
grass soil gives frequent cuttings of
hay, aud makes a soft bed to catch the
falling fruit. No insects are allowed to
destroy tree, leaf or fruit. A garden
sufficient for the wants of the family
occupies a sheltered corner. In it are
straight rows of alt the small fruits and
vegetables desired.
“The soil is made sufficiently rich, and
is well tilled. The surface is kept per
fectly clean by frequent shallow rakings
with a light steel rake. The raking is
done very rapidly, and as a weed is
never allowed to get any age, the labor
is very light. All the land not required
for garden crops is kept continuously in
grass. It is top-dressed quite frequent
ly with horse manure and other fertiliz
ing matters, collected and carefully com
posted ou the place. Little or no fer
tilizer is purchased except wood ashes.
The grass is cut several times a year and
is fed to a horse.
“In the rear of the horse stable we
found a pile of compost sqnar.-dy and
neatly built, upon which daily accumu
lations of manure and other rubbish,
such aspeouies from the garden, etc., are
spread to decay. Underneath the pile
is a tank for collecting drainage. When
needed this liquid manure is poured
around any garden plants that it is de
sirable to force, or it may be dipped up
on the pile to keep it in proper condition
of moisture. By heating aud wetting
the compost before spreading it upon
the grass land no weed seeds are planted
with the manure. Frequent cutting of
the bay crop prevents weeds from going
to seed, etc. Any straggling weed is
pulled up when seen.”
It is fair to suppose that if the “des
tiny that shapes our ends” had placed
the occupant of the “two-acre farm” in
charge of one of average size, the same
intelligent and careful thoroughness
which give good results in a compara
tively small way would have been even
more conspicuous on a surface sufficient
ly extended to enable him to take advan
tage effectively of all the improved faoil
I ities of modern agriculture.
How the Contingency was Avoided.
The St. James's Gazette says:—The
Colonel of an Austrian regiment in gar
rison in Vienna, who seemstc have been
I ore of the class of persons popularly de
scribed as “more nice than wise,” wrote
a little time before the recent man«u-
I vres of the Austrian army to a medical
man in the little town of Anzern, near
which they took place, stating that he
was about to start with his regiment for
Anzern, and that he would feel much
obliged if the Doctor would find a lodg
ing of some sort for him; adding that lie
I hoped it would be in a Christian family,
I as he objected to live with Jews. A day
j or two afterward he received the follow-
I ing reply from Dr. Nenwirth, the per-
I son to whom he had applied:
I “Honored Colonel: The contingency
; which you contemplate with so much
I dissatisfaction, of having to live with
I Jews during your stay here, is happily
j obviated by circumstances. There are
only two Jewish families in the town.
j The Archduke Albert is staying with
i one of them; the Archduke William with
the other, which is my own. I have,
’ etc.”
, The costliest luxury which can be
thought of is ignorance and stupidity.
rf I ®.
>Oll-'
EMMONS, McKEE <fc CO.,
SUCCESSORS TO EMMONS. EADS & CO.
87 ZBIEdO-A-JD STR hTET, ROME, G-7X.
Clothing,, Furnishing Goods, Hats and Men’s Fine Shoes.
Our stock of Men’s Wear this season excels anything ever shown in R line. We want every man in Cherokee county to give us a call this f ill 11 I
we will save you time and money. This may seem like big talk, but our immense stock, bought at extremely low prices, warrants us in making broad asset's
tions. Ours is tee only establishment in Rome where is sold everything worn by the
MALE SEX —MAN OB BOY.
For Good Goods, Correct Styles and Seasonable Prices, we are ACKNOWLEDGED HEADQUARTERS. A careful comparison cannot
fi'il to convince you of this fact. We will appreciate a call.
EMMONS, McKEE & CO,, Men’s and Boys' Ou'flilers,
rm; blue anj> the gray.
BY FRANCIS M. FINCH, NOW JUDGE OF THE COURT
OF APPEALS OF THE STATE OF NEW YORK.
By the flow of the inland river,
Whence the lie. is of iron have flod,
Where the Hades of the grave-grass quiv
Asleep on the ranks of the dead?
Under the sod and the dew,
Waiting the judgment day;
Under the one, the Blue,
Under th • other, the Gray.
t uise in the robings of glory,
Those in the gloom of defeat,
Ail with the battle-blood gory,
(n tlio dusk of eternity meet:
Under the sun aud the dew,
Waiting the judgment day
Under the laurel, the Blue,
Under the willow, the Gra
I’ioin the silence of >orrowful hours,
The desolate mourners go x
. .ovingly laden with Bowers;
Alike forth ■ friend and the foe;
Under the sod and the dew,
Waiting the judgment day;
Under the roses, the Blue,
Under the lilies, the Gray.
So, with an equal splendor,
Ti e morning sun-rays fall,
With a touch impartially tender,
On the bios-oms blooming for allt
Under the sod and the dew;
Wwiting the judgment day;
Broidercd with gold, the Blue,
Mellower! with gold, the Gray.
jo, when the Summer oalleth,
On forest and field of grain,
With an equal murmur falleth
The cooling drip of the rain:
Under the sod and the dew,
Wailing the judgment day;
Wet with the rain, the Blue,
Wet with the rniu. the Gray
Badly, but not with upbraiding,
l lio generous deed was done;
In the storm of th ■ years that are fading,
?o braver battle was won:
Under the sod and the dew,
Waiting the judgment day;
Und r the blossoms, the Blue,
Under the garlands, the Gray
No more shall the war-cry sever.
Or the winding rivers be red;
They banish our anger forever
When they laurel the graves of our doaa
Under the sod and the dew,
Waiting the judgment days
Love and tears for the Blue,
To-’.rs and love for the Gray.
The Mute.
A BTUANGB STOBI.
“Bab I the peasants 1” exclaimed
Charles. “Have nothing to do with
them. During the war they treated the
Prussians better than they treated us.
The sharpshooters hated them worse
than they hated the plague,
“You are wrong, my good fellow,”
eaid Pierre Nerot, who was leaning
against the mantel.
“Ah I you know better than I ?” asked
Charles.
“Yes. An occasion arose recently
which proved to me that during the
‘terrible year’ true French hearts
throbbed under the blouse as well as
under the uniform.”
There were eight or ten members of
the circle grouped about Pierre Nerot.
“A story 1” they all cried.
“Last summer,” said Nerot, “I was
with an old college friend, Dnbreuil,
who had established himself as a physi
cian at his home in a little place in the
Vosges. We had, risen from the table
one day and were about to go for a walk
in the neighboring wood. Dubreuil had
lighted his pipe and I my cigar, and we
were already on the steps when the
sound of footsteps made us turn our
heads. ‘There is the postman,’ said my
companion. ‘Wait for me a second. I
have a letter to give him. I left it up
stairs on my bureau.’ Saying this he
re-entered the house.
“I looked at the new comer. He was
a young man of twenty-six or twenty
seven years, apparently of a pleasant yet
energetic disposition, with an open
countenence and a bright glance. When
he saw me he inclined his head slightly
; n salutation. ‘Ab,’ I said to myself,
‘this is not a garrulous person. He does
io eve.;-av roo i- Liy. ’ Tnen address
ing h m, I eaid:—
■‘ ‘lt is card work, is it not, running
about in such warm weather?’
Hi .. .-id. • i head in assent. Ah, I
tl.ou.’i 1 :'. ii '“t know how to speak.
The young man read my surprise in my
looks. He smiled, somewhat sadly, and
then, putting two fingers to his lips, he
shook his head. This time I under
stood.
“ ‘You are dumb, my poor fellow ?’ I
said.
“At this moment Dubreuil returned 1
with his letter in his hand. He had |
heard my question.
“‘Yes,’he said, ‘he is dumb, poor
Jean Barrot. But that does not pre
vent him from performing his duties
well, since be can read and write and
can hear all that is said to him.'
“ ‘Then he was not born dumb, as he
is not deaf 1’
• ‘No, he was not born dumb.’
" ‘Did he become so by accident ?’
“ ‘Accident is, perhaps, not the right
word. Is it, Jean?
“Tue youug man smiled in an embar
rassed manner. He extended his hand
for the letter which Dubreuil held. The
hitter laughed.
“‘Ah, my boy, that annoys you. You
know I am going to tell your story, and
you do not wish to remain to hear it.
Very well, I will not detain you. I will
not tell it till you have gone.’
“Aud Dubreuil, giving him the letter,
pressed his hand warmly.
“The young man saluted us, turned
his back and departed with long strides.
Then Dubreuil took myarm and told me
the following story, as he led me toward
the wood whose verdure seemed to slum
ber in the white light of the August
sun.
“Jean Barrot, he informed mo, was
fifteen years old a little before the out
break of the war. His father, already
old, lived with his two sons in an old
house in the corner of the field. Joan
was the youi g:r of the brothers, Louis
being ten yearn his senior. Jean being
too young to light remained at homo.
Louis departed with his regiment. He
fought well in two or three engage
ments. But he also rendered other
services. Knowing the country well, he
asked the perilous privilege of bearing
dispatches across the German lines that
separated the army of Metz from the
rest of France. Three times already
had he accomplished that dangerous
journey, and old Barrot, whom his son
had, without doubt, visited some dark
night, was unable to hold his tongue,
and told of Louis's exploits everywhere,
so that the Prussians, who held that
part of the country for several months,
quietly kept watch of the hut, believing
that some day they would make a good
capture.
“And it happened just as they had
foreseen. One evening when Louis had
arrived and was talking with his father
in a corner of the kitchen without a
light, heavy footsteps were heard out
side, and the door was suddenly bat
tered with the butt ends of muskets. It
was too dark for the father and son to
see each’s pale face, but they joined
hands in the darkness and clasped each
other in a convulsive embrace. The
house was surrounded; '.hey were lost.
“Presently, Louis called his brother
in a lew voice.
“ ‘Jean,’ he said, ‘come here. Tty
to get away and conceal that in the
field.’
“He tore away a package of papers
that was sewed to the inside of his shirt
over his breast and handed it to the boy.
The latter took the package, opened a
door and disappeared.
“At the same moment the door at
which the men were battering gave way,
and seven or eight Prussian soldiers en
tered with revolvers in their hands. The
explanation that followed was short.
They seized the two men by the shoul
ders. The spy aud the father who had
harbored him were there. They would
be shot the next morning. In the
meantime, not to lose a moment, they
searched the young man, taking off his
blouse and his shirt. They fouad
nothing.
“ ‘The dispatches that yon brought,
where are they ?’ demanded the leader
of the soldiers.
“ ‘The dispatches?' replied Louis Bar
rot. ‘f have none.’
“ ‘What then was there a moment
since?’ said the officer, pointing to a
strip of ripped cloth which had formed
part of a pocket and from which the
threads still hung.
“ 'You think that I carried papers
there ?'
“T am certain of it. You must have
had them there a moment ago.’
“ ‘Well, then, since they are no longer
there look for them.’
“ ‘S arch every where I’ cried the offi
cer io his men.
“The soldi -. s "b. veil, opening every
drawer, ovettntuiiig the furniture and
examining the ashes ou the hearth,
They found nothing. Presently two sol
siers appeared on the threshold of the
door with little Joan. They had been
left on guard without, and had just seen
him as he was crawling behind a hedge.
They pushed him before them into
circle of flickering light cast by the furn- \
iug lamp. The boy concealed his hands |
behind his back.
“ ‘What is that you are hiding there ?’
said the officer to him in a rough voice.
“ ‘Nothing.’
“ ‘Show your hands, then.’
“The boy exposed his hands. They
were covered with dirt.
“ ‘Ah, you little rascal,’ exclaimed the
officer, ‘it was you who concealed the
papers ? Whore are they?’
“The boy remained silent
“ ‘Listen,’ said the German. ‘There is
your fatiier, is he not ? and there is your
brother?’
“Little Jean twice nodded his head.
“ ‘Very well. If you do not tell
where the papers are they will both bo
shot. If you tell—they shall live.’
“The boy turned his eyes toward his
father,
“ ‘Jean,’ said the old man, ‘listen well
to what I say. Even though we die in
your sight, do not speak.'
“The boy replied, 'Very well.’
“‘To-morrow, then,’ said the officer,
with an angry gesture.
“The next morning at dawn, in the
square before the Mayor's office in
the neighboring village, old Barrot and
his son Louis stood erect, with uncovered
heads, immovable and pale. Twenty
steps from them stood the firing party,
with their arms at rest. All about, kept
back by a cordon of soldiers, were wo
men aud old meu, who craned their
necks in their efforts to catch a glimpse
of the prisoners, murmuring angrily,
their lips trembling and their eyes blood
shot. Near the firing party, between
two soldiers, stood little Joan, his face
livid, but Iris head erect
“Half an hour before the officer had
led him into a room in the mayoralty,
where his father and his brother were
guarded, and ordered that they should
be left by themselves. Wliat did he
hope from this interview ? That the two
men would melt before the tears of the
lad? The boy wept certainly, for his
eyes were red. But what had his father
said? When little Jean came out the
oflicer asked:—
“ ‘Do you wish to speak now?’
“Little Jean replied that he did not.
Then his father aud his brother would
be taken from him. They would be
placed together against the wall before
his eyes. Even now they were there
before him awaiting death.
“There was a moment of horrible
suspense. At last the officer gave a
command in German and the soldiers
levelled their muskets. The oflicer
turned to the boy.
“ ‘Do you wish to speak ?’ he said.
“Tue boy’s lips did not move; but his
form trembled, an expression of fright
ful anguish passed over his countenance
aud he uttered a half-stifled cry. Then
he tottered.
“The officer approached him, listen
ing for the confession which he thought
would fall from his contracted lips. It
was not a confession that issued from
his lips, but a flow of blood.
“The officer sprang back. On his
uniform, ou the breast just over his
heart, was seen a red stain, while at his
feet a shapeless thing, also red, fell on
the pavement. The boy had bitten his
tongue iu two and had spit part of it
forth into the face of his tormentor.
“ ‘Fire I’ cried the latter, furious with
rage.
“A discharge of musketry sounded
like a peal of thunder, and little Jeau,
fainting, fell at the moment when old
Barrot aud his sou Louis were killed.
“ ‘And that,’ said my friend Dubreuil,
'is the reason why our postman is
dumb ’ ” Joseph Montet.
He WoBKftD. —A fellow in McPher
l sou, Kv-., got rid of a judgment by
■ sweaiiug that''he worked for his wife
\ !ot a sai iry of iJIO a year and his chew-
I iug tobacco.” Teat wa? probably con
i siderably more than he was really worth.
The clam is gradually propagating
itself all aloug the California coast. It
is only ten years siuce the bivaive be
came common on the shores of San
Francisco Bay, aud now it is found as
far down the coast as Santa Barbara.
GIVING AWAY THE BABY.
A Tonching Little Ntory Told by M. Quan.
Some weeks ago a family consisting
f husband wife and a baby about 3
ears old, reached Detroit from some
point in a destitute condition,
and finally got n room in a house on
Catharine street with a citizen whose
sympathies had been aroused. For a
time both parents were ill, and the man
had scarcely recovered when the wife
died. Unable to work, and equally un
able to care for the child, he permitted a
woman living near by to take it home.
A day or two ago, having vainly searched
for work in Detroit, the man decided to
go farther west. Three or four different
families offered to take the baby and
adopt it, and he was forced to realize
that he must part with it. Poor, desti
tute, friendless, and with only money
enough to take him to Chicago, what
could he do ? When the time came to
make a decision there was a crowd of
women appealing to him and promising to
be a mother to the little waif. He took
the child in his arms and wept for it,
aud said in a broken voice :
“Poor Billy I I’m putting you away
forever I”
The child clung fast to his neck with
jne arm, and with the free hand wip»’
away his tears and said:
“Pa’s crying—pa’s crying 1 Is pa
sick ?”
The man pressed the boy to his heart,
kissed him again and again, and to the
woman who was to take him he said:
“It’s tearing my heart out, but it
must be done I He'll grow up to forget
his dead mother aud me, and never to
hoar our names spoken ; but I’ve got to
let him go. One more kiss, Billy.”
“Papa doin’ away?”
“Yes ; good bye.”
“Dood bye. Hurry home.”
The women sobbed and the men shed
tears, and all of a sudden the father
rushed from the house and hurried
from the neighborhood without one
glance behind him, doubtless fearing
that if he tarried a moment longer his
'eve would prove stronger than his '
ledge. _
——-
The Dying Dolphin’s Beauty.
EXQUISITE TINTS THAT OIVB PLACE, HUE
BY HUE, SOON AFTER THE FISH IS
CAUGHT.
A correspondent, on a fishing excur
sion at Fire Island Beach, says : “But
to-night we still hold the banner as the
champion fishers of Fire Island, having
caught, about seven miles from the
lighthouse, a dolphin weighing between
fourteen and fifteen pounds, the first one
that has been caught here by any boat
in live years. We had it broiled for
slipper and sent around to the tables
where we had acquaintances. It is a
rather dry fish, by no means equal in
flavor to a Spanish mackerel, but very
good eating. Now, I am going to tell
you how we caught it, and though a
a ‘fish story' it is literally true. Harry
(H. B. Dauchy) had the outrigger ahd
had omitted to fasten the stick. The
line is wound on so that the loop in the
end of the pole was all that held it.
Suddenly came a ‘big strike,’ bending
the pole so the loop slipped off and
away went fish and tackle. A general
shout of dismay—when in an instant
Mrs. Dauchy, who had the inside line on
the same side of the boat, said: ‘I have
a flsh.’ We let the boat come to and
began’pulling in. Lo! and behold—her
squid had caught the stick of Harry’s
tackle and she had saved both tackle
and fish. Joel pulled him alongside of
the boat and landed him with a gaff
hook. v
“Talk of beautiful colors. The ‘dying
dolphin’ is no vision of the poet’s fancy.
In the water an exquisite blue, a mo-
I ment after coming out a rich gold color
with black spots, then in another mo
j ment turning to silver with blue spots,
then blue with purple spots, aud finally
to a perfect mother-of-pearl with blue
I spots, the great back fin being an ex
\ qnisite peacock blue.”
A vigorous old fellow who had lately
buried his fourth wife was accosted by
an acquaintance, who, unaware of his
: bereavement, ask< I: “H >wis your wife,
Cip'n Norris?” To which the captain
r.plied with a perfectly grove face,
' “Waal, to tell ye sh: trowth, I'm kinder
out of wives just naow."
forever 1”
THE lItJMOROUS PAPERS.
VTIIAT WE FIND !N THEIR COLUMNS
TO SMILE OVER.
4 Dr nr I nder ilic Merclmnt’s
Counter—Tcrribh* I xperienres—Rrflne
i»H‘i I «>f Cruelty—Tired of :he Sinking
ndi Etc.
A SPOTTED DEAR.
Two young women were examining
the animals iu the Zoo Z >o.
“Oh, what a beautiful spotted deer 1”
said one, The other woman bowed her
head and wept.
“Why, what’s the matter?”
“Oh, you don't know how bad you
made me feel when you talked about
that spotted deer. I once had a dear.”
“You did ?”
“Yes. My dear was a conductor on
the horse ear line, and we were going to
get married, but the company spotted
him and he lost his position, and ever
since it makes me feel bad to hear peo
ple say anything about spotted dears.”
—St. Loxiis Critic.
THREE SHEETS IN THE WIND.
At sea: Small girl—“ Aren’t yon aw
fully glad to be on land sometimes?”
Uncle—“ Why, what do you mean? I
flatter myself I am on land most of the
time.”
Small girl—“ You are? Why, papa
says that whenever h's sees you. you are
about half seas over.” - 7.ZA
SERVING DINNFB.
Mistress: “Bridget, I told you to
warm the soup plates and the tureen.”
Bridget: “Faith, mum, an’ the plates
is that hot ye can’t tech thim.”
Mistress: “The plates are hot, but the
tureen is quite cold.”
Bridget: “Shure an’ oi thot the soup
wud warrum the turane. mum.”
PENSIONING AN EMPLOYEE.
A faithful employee lipd grown old in
the service of a railroad, and at last be
came too feeble to work.
The President was asked if the com
pany would not do something for him,
as he was very poor.
“How long has he been with us?” the
official inquired.
“Over forty years.”
“Always did his duty ?”
“Never missed a day.”
“You say he is very old and feeble?”
“Yes, the chances are that he will
never leave his bed again.”
“H-m, poor fellow 1 Os course we
must do something for him. I’ll give
him a life pass.”
A DRY SEASON.
First Milkman—What a dry season
this has been, hasn't it ?
Second Milkman—Awful dry; never
«aw anything like it.
Plenty of water along in June.
Yes, but you can’t use your water and
keep it, too.
Wnat have you been doing to keep
your customers supplied ?
Why, I had to give ’em milk right
along.
Milk 1
Yes; what did yon give ’em? <
Why, I hauled water from the lake
an 1 let the cows drink the milk.—Bur
lington Free Preus.
WE PRINT IT AGAIN.
She was a remarkably sensible young
lady who made a request of her friends
that after her decease she should not be
buried by the side of a brook, where bab
bling lovers would wake her from her
drcams, nor in any grand cemetery,
where sight-seers, conning over epitaphs,
might distract her, but be laid away to
take her last sleep under the counter of
some merchant who did not advertise in
the newspapers. There, she said, was
to be found peace passing all under
standing, a depth of quiet slumber on
which the sound of neither the buoyant
foot of youth nor the weary shuffle of
old age would ever intrude.
A TRIBUTE TO THE RODENT.
Two Austin gentleman, Ooh Yerger
and Sam Bass, were talking about the
comparative intelligence of animals.
“I think that a horse is the most in
telligent animal,” remarked Col. Yerger.
“No, sir, the horse is not. The rat
is the shrewdest and smartest little ani
mal I know of. It has a wonderful
power of discrimination The rot never
sets tire to a scjro by nibbling at matches
until everything is insured for more
than its value. A rat who is in that
line of business is sharper than a fire in
surance agent with a sixty ounce brain
and thirty years experience.— Texas
Siftings.
WHAT PUZZLED HIM.
It is reported that u day or two ago
Mr. St. John went into a Kansas drug
tore aud called for a glass of sod?
water.
His left eye accidentally twitched as
the clerk gazed at him inquiringly. The
mistaken clerk, not knowing the gentle-
I man, gave him a liberal allowance of the
usual flavor demanded on such occasions,
and the glass was drained to the dregs
“My goodness gracious me!” said
the candidate, smacking his lips. “I
don't see how men can drink liquor
when they can get soda water like that.”
Graphic.
SUSCEPTIBLE OF PROOF.
“Yes, sir,” said a proud young father,
“she’s the prettiest little baby girl in the
city, aud I’ll bet money on it.”
“How can you prove it?” he was
asked.
“Prove it ? Why. I can prove it by her
mother.” _
The Watch.—lt is stated on good
authority that it is a well-known fact
that no watch will keep the same time
with two people. This is said to be
owing to the temperament of the wearer,
aud it is claimed that even the mere
physical difference in gait and movement
between different people will affect the
keeping of absolutely accurate time,
and it is probable, also, that it is effected
in some slight degree by the magnetism
of the wearer.
Haunted.—There is a cell in the
Leadville jail said to be haunted, and
prisoners are put into it for special pun
ishment. A superstitious woman was
thus frightened out of her wits, and has
since suffered nervous prostration. She
sues the jailer for damages.