Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

heWw' ift z-< V*) w*’ ( le H' t’?^ B ga$ e ywmwßß-; Y ' <-45 • z ’AS N 0 eqUA 1 - / 30 UNION SQUARE NEW YORK -Y' b^ A *>- ill MASS. CA. FOR SALS BY t >n .. SUMMERVILLE, GA * stikl new HiehAem □avis .The lightest running Shuttle Sewing Machine ever produced, combining greatest simplicity, durability and speed. It is adapted to a greater va riety of practical and fancy work than any other. No basting ever required. For particulars as to prices, &c„ and for any desired information, address FHE DAVIS SEWING MACHINE CO., WATERTOWN, N. Y. 158 Tremor t St., Boston, Mass. 1223 Chestnut St., Philadelphia, Pa. 113 Public Square, Cleveland. Ohio. 46. 48 &50 Jackson St., Ci >c, 111. For sale in Summerville bj J. 8. CLEGHORN A CO. ALAE ' CINE A Superior Substitut-; for Kalsor;-.ct,< Alabartine ?; the /and/, ; roi> ■. ma<lefrom n.dcin? ; mn-nn r,r :•/>"■.■ ‘ 1,1 r '• .1’- 'ip: tnid sutfaw, without d.u.u.-r’o/’.-.-uf...’.. i.oliceably adding to the thickness <>f i: ■> wall, which is strengthened mid Impro-.e I each additional coat, from time to Ln; • p. is the only material fur the puqivbc not <’ * pen<lcrif ii|>on gh«a for mlbcstvenes*. is hardened on Urn wall bv age, moisture, etc., while all kalsomines or whit. <‘bpreparations have inert soft chalks ixi I,‘iue for their base, which arc rendered soft or >cakd in a ven bort lime. In i. nlion i > : e above advantage Aiaba.->tiim is less expensive, as it requires lat one-half (lie numlm*t of pounds to li.e same amount of surface with two coats, is remix for use by adding water, and easily applied by any one. I - • by your Paint Dealer. Ask for <'iciibi containing Samples of 12 tints ■nnufactured <ml\ by the Alabasti.se Co., B Chi'kch, Manager,Grand Rapids, Mich. >-■ PURE * ReadyForUse Olives, Terra Cottas and all the latest fashionable shades for CITY COUNTRY OR SEASIDE. Warranted durable and permanent. Dc-ccriptive Lists, showing 32 actual shades, sent on application. For sale by the principal dealers, wholesale and retail, throughout the country. Ask for them and. take no others. 3ILUHGS, TAYLOR & CO. CLEVELAND, OHIO. A PrcrmiAß Fipweh—Some year-; ago travelers in Dalmatia noJveu large tracts of land covered by a wild flower, near which not a sign of insect life was visible. The bloom was the pyrethrum, whose odor deals death to the lower forms of life and whose powdered leaves form the basis of “insect powders.” The seed of this flower was distributed in the U sited States, and a Dalmatian has been growing it with great success at Stock ton, Cat Prof. Snow recently read an article on the subject before the Kansas State Board of Agriculture, and it seems likely from the report that an industry of importance will arise from the Dalma tian’s experiment The Arabs of the desert drink bu' < nee every two days. There are no free lunch saloons in that section. @ljc dfrajefte. VOL XI. SUMMERVILLE, GEORGIA. WEDNESDAY EVENING, DECEMBER 10, 1884, NO. 47. «- SANDS' —• PATENT TRIPLE sMOTIONgga The only Freezer ever made having three distinct motions inside the can. thereby, of course. pr< Jn. ing finer and smoother Cream than any other Freezer on the market. 300,000 in use. Catalogue and Price List nailed upon application. | WHITE MOUNTAIN FREEZER CO., NASHUA. N. H. An Ancient Tunnel. The Governor of Samoa, Abysside Pasha, has at last succeeded, after years of work, in uncovering the entrances to a tuunel of which Herodotus Bfieaks u ith admiration as the work of Eipalinos and Megaira, and which, according io the same authority, was built during tho tenth century B. 0. The tuunel, about 5,000 feet long, was intended to secure a supply of fresh water to. tho old sen port town of Samos, and consists of three parts. They are the tunnel proper, 5; feet high and 6 feet wide; a canal about 5 feet deep aid nearly 3 feet wide, which runs in the middle or on tho side of the base of the tunnel; and the aque duct running m this canal. The aque duct consists of earthen pipes, each 215 feet long, 32 inches to 33 inches in cir cumference, the sides averaging about 1| inches in thickness. Every other joint has a hole, for what purpose has not yet been fully explained. Mr. Stam atiades, a Greek archaeologist, believes that they were intended to facilitate tho cleaning of the pipes and to make tho flow of water easier. The canal is arched over, but twenty-eight manholes were provided to admit the workmen who were charged with cleaning ami re pairing the aqueduct. The tunnel is not quite straight, forming an elbow about 1,300 feet from one of the entrances. This elbow, according to .Mr. Stama tiades, was caused by a mistake in the calculations of the engineers, who bad none of the instruments used in tunnel building nowadays. The tunnel starts near a small water-conrse wbijh may have been quite a stream in olden times, pierces the mountain Kestri, winch was formerly crowned by the Fort bamos, and ends a few hundred yards from the old town of Samos, about ten feet below the surface. From the mountain slope to the citv this subterranean aqm-.uict is protected by a mus-ive stone struc ture, ending within the walls of the pres <nt convent of St. John. The preserva tion of this work—which is truly won derful, considering tee imperfvct me chanical resources at ti e di posal if the builders—for nearly 3,000 years is prob ably due to the care taken by Eupahrios, who, in all places where the rock did not seem of sufll ient firmness, lined the tunnel with several layers of brick, run ning on the top into a peaked arch.—• London Lun. -«► • A Plucky Young Man. Here is a trne story of sticc< ssful en ergy. A young drug clerk wrote from the Far West to a prominent pharma cist in New York, saying be would like to come to the city and enter a store. He came, but when the pharmacist questioned him personally he found that his visitor bad never put up prescrip tions in Latin; consequently, he could not get a situation. He did not know a soul in the great city, nor even the gen tleman to whom he had written (until he met him at his store). He sought in vain for a place, and finally found a sub ordinate position, where he was given five dollars a week and had to board himself. He was a studious, pushing, act ive young fellow, and soon managed to attend the lectures at the College of Pharmacy. Tbe gentleman with whom he corresponded took an interest in him, and invited him to come to his store and assist in the manufacturing of fluid ex tracts. Once he showed his employer what he could do in that line. Tbe man was surprised. “Why can’t you do something of that kind for me?" he asked. The clerk said he could, and his salary (which in the meanwhile had been slightly increased) was raised to very respectable proportions. He worked for a time in this way, eventually receiving a salary of SSO a week; finally • be opened a laboratory of his own, and to-day he employs forty or fifty “hands.” And yet, when he arrived in New York he did not hewe a dollar, and was with out influence and without friends.--<s?. Nicholas for November. Which is the most costly, a horse or a bicycle? The first cost is often about the same; the difference afterwards de pends on the relative price of arnica and oats EMMONS, McKEE & CO., SUCCESSORS TO EMMONS. EAOS & CO. 87 BZRzO.A.JD STREET, ROME, OJV Clothing, Furnishing Goods, Hats and Men’s Fino Shoes. Our stock of M -ns Wear thb season excels anything ever shown in Rune. We want, every mm iti Cherokee county to give us a ca’l this fill an I we will stive you time and m mey. This mav seem like big talk, but our immense stock, bought at extremely low prices, warrants us in making broad asser tions. Ours is tee only establishment, in Rime where is sold everything worn by the .MALI'. SEX —MAN OR. BOY. For Good Grinds, Correct S’vies and Seasonable Prices, we are ACKNOWLEDGED HEADQUARTERS. A careful comparison cannot, fril to convince you ol this fact, n e will appreciate a call. EMUS, Mc?EE & CO,, Men's and Boys’ ou&s. 87 Broad Street, ROME, C \. A WFUL HARD LINRS. Though you/uould oonie und kneel low at my 1 feet, And weep in blood-red tears of agony, It wouid not bring « ne single pang to me, Nor Ht.r my heart out of its quiet beat. There was a time when any word you spoke, Wh< n just the sound of your melodiout voice Would thrill mo through and make my heart rejoice. Your will was law. But now the spell is broke, ■ Yon rudely woke me from my dream of bliss. Knowing my love, reading it everywhere; You Hou.'ht to see how much my heart would lietr. Such things I can forgive; but never this. And though an angel, with a shining brow, Should come from heaven and speak to me, i and say: “Go w th this man and be his own alway,” I would defy her, rather than tmst you now. Though you should pray me, writhing in white pain. For just one last caress, and 1 should know That you were draining .nil tho dregs of woe, i I would not let you hold my hand again. This is a woman’s love, a woman’s pride. There is a stream that never can be crossed; ! It rolls between Us, and the trust 1 lost Was sunk forever in the seething tide. —Hawkeye. 1 AN INVENTOirS I‘EIUL. The lane, leading east from Chatham street, is sometimes called Golosh street. If, is a greasy, sodden, dirt-laden place, crowded with junk shops and sec ond-hand clothing stores. St. Vrain, I the inventor, for a long time occupied the top floor of No. 11). It was a large, unfinished loft, with naked, smoko stained, cobwebbed rafters overhead, and two dingy windows looking down on I the Goloshian pavement, with its seven distinct strata of dirt. Since St. Vrain 1 had hired this comfortless garret, ten years before, no foot of stranger had ; entered it, not even that of his land lord. Only after nightfall did the in ventor himself leave the place, nor, even then, until he had locked and donble locked both his trap-door and the door at the foot of the stair. Occupying the central portion of the attic, and reach ing from window to window, was the machine upon which St. Vrain had spent his fortune. At each end of tho room was an upright, cylindrical mass of metal, covered with polished knobs of silver, connected tog< flier by wires, and insulated from the floor by plates of glass. The metal was steel, but it was steel which had been snbnaittcd to a costly and secret process, and treated with various chemicals, for a purpose new to science. In the space between these huge cylinders, each one fifteen feet high, were retorts, blowpipes, work benches, and all the tools of an expert chemist, also a forge, and the tools of a worker in metai. When one examined more closely tho huge steel cylinders, it was seen that they were made of small plates riveted together, and, huge as the task seemed, it was evident that one man’s unaided labor had produced it. St. Vrain rat beside his work-table, one night in August, and looked at the cylinders of steel. He touched a knob, close at hand, and a soft, lambent flame began to play about each. Toe dull metal became fairly luminous, and a delicate sound, clear and vibrant as that of an 33'rli.in harp, stirred the dull air, “It is done,” said St. Vrain, “and the forty million dollars that my grandfather rifled from the treasure-vault of the Incas, in the heart of the Andes, are nearly spent for the sake of this, my ' gift to poor, struggling humanity. Never yet have I said a word, and so, if I died to-night, and careless hands wrested apart my cylinders, half of New . York might perish; I must write down ; the outline.” He found a large sheet of coarse brown wrapping paper, and began to | write. Steadily for several hours, the 1 words flowed from his pen till both j sides of the sheet were covered with ai- j most microscopic writing. Then heteft : it on the table and went into the street ! below, returning with a miserable cur, j which he had cajoled upstairs with a bit of bread. St. Vrain now touched another knot The light that shone fr-.m one of the i tail cylinders grew brighter and its color varied from pale pearl and clear opal to lemon and orange, rose and crimson and tremuioiui violet; the light that shone j from the other changed to a sombre and inexpressibly mournful tint, from one ' came a sense of joy and warmth and vi- ‘ tality, from the other a sense of pain, i and cold, and decay. “Life and Death, North and South Pole,” cried St. Vrain, exultingly. “Now, let me test the invention that an nihilates time and space and sets the human race free from its bonds, and makes us gods on earth, and gives us a thousand years of life I” He picked up the crouching dog at i his feet, and hastily scrawling a few words on a scrap of paper, tied it by means of a strip of handkerchief to the dog's neck, lie went to the dark and co’d cylinder, the one he had likened to the South Pole. Gently, firmly, rever- I ently, as if in the presence of a mighty j force, he put his hand upon a great brown knob, and listened. He opened ! a curving-door—the cylinder was hollow. A dull smoke, like dust of opium, strug gled out, and for a second he staggered as against the influence of sleep. “Ah I the pores of the steel boxes eak a little still,*' he said, as he thrust the yelping dog inside and closed | the door upon him. St. Vrain went to tho other cylinder I and, opening tho door, peered in. A , warm and fragrant and inspiriting breath rushed out. Ho closed it and re turned to the first one. Four silver knobs were close to his hand. He spoke, as if explaining tho mysteries of the mechanism to a stranger ‘ Now, when I touch the first knob, my Solvent Force will operate, andpain ! lessly and instantaneously melt that dog into his original atoms. When t touch ; the second knob, these atoms will flow ■ out through the noTlow white wire, anil ■ into the second cylinder, arriving there : long before they have lost tiny Os their ■ mutual attraction, or relationship I drawn there by the virtue of the force in : that cylinder. When I touch the third knob this Force will instantaneously and painlessly reconstruct the creature, down to his every hair, and even reor ganize the ink particles of the letter I hung to his neck. When I touch tho last knob the cylinder door will open and he will step out, his accustomed onr-ship, unconscious that henceforth be is immortal, as the firsthvingcreature that was telegraphed through space,” The inventor's eyes glowed and his form dilated Ho touched the four knobs, one after another, as rapidly as a musician would strike four consecutive notes. The door of the second cylinder, sixty feet distant, claliged open, the dog sprang out, and came to St. Vrain at his call. About the animal’s nick was the paper roll. He opened it, read the mem oranda, and cried aloud in ecstasy: “The paper is more porous, and the ink seems faded; but I must not expect to transfer whole libraries across the Atlantic with- I out a little more practice. ” Then for a long lime he was lost in thought. Suddenly he exclaimed: “I must know the experience myseli. Who of all the world, but St. Vrain, shall first of men traverse space thus?” That frenzy and utter obiiviousness to danger, that at times beset all genius of the highest order, now controlled St. I Vrain, and he threw prudence to the I winds. “Anyone will do,” he cried. “Any I person can touch four knobs one after I another.” He hastened ou t upon the street just as the faint d:i .:i began to streak the cloudy east. A drunken sailor was lean ing against a post. St. Vrain approached ! him. “Come on. I want you to help me a minute, and I’li give you twenty dol lars.” “AU right, capt’n, I’ll go aboard, i Money ail gone. Time to ship for 1 ’nother v'y’ge.” Then St. Vrain hustled him upstairs, ! and, opening the door of the second cyl l inder, thrust him in a moment, till the | vital emanation from its walls somewhat , sobered him. zl few miuu’cs later St. Vniin and the ignorant stood before the j mysterious door over which the four sil i wr knobs gleamed. “Now,” said St. YTain, “I am trying an experiment of great importance. Win n I open the door and step in and i oiose it, you must touch, one after an other, these knobs marked one, two, threeund four.” And he made the man go through with thh> operation several times, till sure that 4 he understood it. “Whfin'k come out, which will be as soon asyoifiouch the last knob, I will give you, instead of twenty dollars, the one-huudred-dollar bill that I hold in my hand.” St Vrain stepped into the dark cylin der, armed with a firm will, and antici pating the astonishment of the sailor when he should step forth from the other. He closed it, and the man in stantly reached up to the four knobs. He pressed the first; St. Vrain was whirled into tho depths of total uncon sciousness. Dizzy, however, with the returning effects of his potations and with the atmosphere from the interior of tho cylinder, tho sailor failed to press the second knob and open up communi cations ; he pressed the third, and a soft light filled tho room; he pressed tho fourth, and the second door opened, the light ceased; again the Vital Force revived his whiskey-sodden brain to ac tivity. No St. Vrain returned. He waited fifteen minutes, and he tried to open the door of tho cylinder, but failed completely. Then he pressed the first knob again. The roar as of a whirlwind followed, ami the room began to trem ble under foot; ho had released a double portion of the dreadful Solvent Force, the second silver wire began to hum like telegraph wires in a storm. To have pressed tho other knobs would have restored St. Vrain’s atomized body and flouting sou! to normal relations, but the shaking of the room frightened the sailor from further experiment in that direction. He saw another knob ttpon the cylinder, marked five, and pressed it in total desperatioii; The third wire between the cylinders threw forth mighty rays and foot-long electric sparks. Both cylinders toppled forward, and toward each other, and, as they fell, crashing, they melted under the frightened sailor's sight, first into flying fragments of iron, and then into faint and disappearing flakes of iron-rust. The Solvent Force and the Vital Force, released, and rushing into each other’s embrace, had naturally destroyed each other, and somewhere in the dual-sown particles of the dingy garret, into which the earliest sunlight was just beginning to shine, were the atoms that half an hour before had made np St. Vrain, tho greatest inventive genius the world had known. The trembling sailor fled from tho S| of. iti wild terror, and was on shipboard and at sea before another daybreak Deeper dust gathered on the walls and books ahd forge; the raiti drove in at the open window, and St. Vrain’s blankets molded and decayed month after month. At last the quarterly rent-day camo, and passed, and St. Vrain, for the first time for ten years and three months, failed to appear. The gruff, unshaven receiver of stolen goods who owned tho building wits delighted. “Dot queer man promise to pay double rent, so long as I never ask questions about his pis’ness. I dinks he counterfeit money. Now I make him pay more.” And he went to St. Vrain’s garret, took possession of his goods, tools, and curiosities and ultimately sold them. The receiver of the stolen goods could not read and St. Vrain’s descrip tion of his machine, written on brown wrapping-paper, was thrown into the ash barrel with other rubbish. Moral.—Keely himself would better not fool too much about bis motor witii its unknown vapor force. The first thing he knows he will be missing.— The Hour. Explorations In Africa. The largest exploring party now in Africa is that of Major Carvalho, who was finely equipped by the Portuguese Government last Jnne, and dispatched from Angola with a force of four hun dred native carriers to visit the domin ions of the Muata Yanvo, about five hun dred miles south of tbe Congo. He is the bearer of splendid presents to that Central African potentate, and hopes to open up his country, which is said to be as large as Germany, to travelers and traders. Only two educated Europeans, Drs. Pogge and Buchner, have succeed ed in reaching Kawende. the capital of the Muata Yanvo, who would not per mit them to pass throngh his country, but compelled them to retrace their steps. Three hundred chiefs owe him allegiance. In territorial extent his em pire is the largest in Central Africa, bnt it is not so densely f opuluted as Mtesus Uganda. m?d is supposed. Ho have only 2,000.000 inhabitants. IAINTY WORK FOR FAIR RANDS. .■holograph Frnmeo. Tissue I.nmp Shade, und Lovely Je>' el Cases. It is now Hie fashion to carry the opera glass, handkerchief, etc., in a little bag held on the arm by a ribbon. A dainty one may lie made at home out of an old silk handkerchief and a piece of silk. The silk may lie in two colors, one for ' each side. The bag should measure ! eight or ten inches square and should be i lined with the silk handkerchief. The : ribbon should be run around the open j ing two inches from the top and tied in 1 a large loop and bow. The monogram I or initials embroidered on one side in I silk and an edging of Valenciennes or i Oriental lace about tbe top, add to tho effect. A pretty frame for a photograph may be made out of the cover of a pasteboard box. Cut out the frame to fit, then cover neatly with a piece of garnet or I dark-blue silk or silesia. Over this paste I maple leaves, which may be gathered ' beautifully tinted id this season. The leaves should be put on with tho points in one direction. Cover with a coating of copal varnish. If desired tho frame 1 can bo made oval or circular. A Brooklyn girl has made a pretty lamp-shade out of a sheet of pink tissue paper. Bho first cut it in a piece of eight inches wide and three-quarters of a yard long. This was neatly pasted to gether and the top and bottom cut in long pointed scallops. The whole was then folded in knife pleatings and pressed between two hooks. When carefully opened tho part to go about tho top of tho lamp was caught by a . band of the paper pasted an inch from the edge, and a butterfly bow ornta mented on otie side. When placed over the white porcelain shade a rosy tint is ' thrown out which will be found very pretty for tho parlor and also becoming the complexion. Lovely jewel cases may be made out of cigar-boxes. Cover the outside with some light-tinted silk or satin. Line the inside of the lid and box with one thickness of cotton-butting and cover this with the silk or satin. A box-plait ing of narrow satin ribbon or narrow velvet nailed down with tiny brass nails will keep tbe satin in place about the ' edges. A little musk or cologne should be sprinkled over the cotton. A pretty bed for a pet cat or dog may lie made out of an old square fruit basket. Tip one end of the cover in side the basket and fasten it so with strong cotton. Varnish the basket with ; shoe bronze and put a pretty bit of car pet inside, and a how of ribbon on the outside. A little bannerette of silk, with the name of the pet embroidered on it, placed over tbe front of the basket will ' make this little bed more attractive. > Getting There. It doesn’t take a great while to get a boy out of a place where he wants to I stay. Man comes out into the orchard. , “Child’en, come right down out en that are tree this miuute I” t “Which one?” “Why, that ini yer in.” “This one ?” , 1 “Yes, that one.” “This one here by the fence ?” [. i “Yes, that un yer in.” “Well, we’re cornin’ down.” “Well, come down mighty quick.” “Well, I am.” “Hurry, then.” “Must 1 come clear down?” “Clear down on the ground, an’ get 1 thar mighty quick, too.” ’ “Well”—slowly sliding down the trunk—“l am down ; what are you hol- >’ lerin’ at me for ?’’ If there are ten boys in the tree, the j entire dialogue with variations has to ' be repeated with each boy, in case the man is their father or some near rela tive, and by the time the last boy gets ' ' to the ground there isn’t an apple on ' the tree. In case the interviewer is a 1 stranger or a dog, however, the first word or preparatory bark isn’t com- I pleted before the tree is as desolate and • i solitary as a garden of cucumbers, while the adjacent load is full of howling ' . buys, casting into tbe orchard Parthian 1 shots of casual stones an I derisive re- • 1 marks.— Burlington Hawkeye. When a young lady begins to re ’ : mark, “He is not such a fool as .feg ■ looks, "it i o a sign that there will 1# a wedding soon. THE HUMOROUS PAPERS. WHAT WE FIND IN THEIR COLUMNS TO SMILE OVER. A Knle—The Diwscr of it— Chances In Bnnl ncNM—The Bnby—The .*»tnrM and th Woodpile—On the -afe Side, Etc , Etc. THE STARS AND THE WOODPILE. “Sometimes as I gaze into the great star-lit girdle of earth and try to fathom the mystery of space, I am lost in the utter helplessness of my littleness,” re marked Mr. Jarphly. “How impossible it is for the human mind to comprehend anything without a beginning and an end 1 It is beyond its capabilities, however cultured or brilliant that mind may be. For what, then, are our little petty ambitions, spites, malices, strug gles and exertions ? For what do we ex ist? For ” “Got that wood chopped yet, Jere miah ?” cried out Mrs. Jarphly from the kitchen. “I'm chopping it,” replied ier hus band. "Well, you’d better hurry. I reckon if you have to go without your supper you won’t tie wondering what you exist for.”— Pittsburgh Chronicle. THE BABV. He's como where he’ll have to scratch for his grub, And reach out for everything he geti; He’ll weep when they first douse him into the tub, And he’ll get shaken up when he frets. They’ll think he's smart when he first learns to crawl And they’ll go into fits when he talks; And hell have the most fun when he’s very, very small, For he’ll have to go it alone when he walks. B. J. Bubhettk. A FACETIOUS FATHER. “Pa, can money talk?” “That’s what betting men say, some times, my son.” ‘ 'What can it talk, pa ?” “I suppose it can talk good cents.” HE SQUEEZED OUT. “William Broker,* she said to her husband, very earnestly, as they sat at the breakfast table, “look me in the eye and tell me the truth. Are you losing all your money in a fruit speculation ?” He was scared to death when she be gan, bnt conscious innocence gave him strength and courage as she concluded her question. “No,” he said, firmly, “I am not.” “I believe yon are,” she said, shaking her head, ‘ ‘for last night you cried in your Bleep, and said you had lost every chip you had in the world on one little pear.” And then he gasped and admitted that he had dropped a few cases in a little deal in perishable fruits. But it was the narrowest escape ho ever had in his life.— Hawkeye. THE DANGER OF IT. Tiresome Dude: “I happened to, aw, get hold of an Erie papah to-day, and I saw the funniest thing in it—too funny for anything.” Tired Beauty: “Do tell it then.” “Why, it was about a young lady at a little town called Harborcreek. It said she dislocated her jaw while yawning. Wasn’t it stwange ?” “Nothing strange, lam sure. The young gentlemen of Harborcreek should be talked to.” “Weally, now, I can’t see what you are dwiving at, ye know.” “One of them probably called on her and stayed too late.” — J*hila. Call TAKING CARE OF THE SICK. “Oh, dear,” sighed a farmer’s wife wearily, bh she dropped into a chair after a hard day’s work, “I feel just as if I were going to be sick. My head throbs, and my back aches dreadfully and” “By goßh,” interrupted the farmer, starting up and seizing his hat, “that reminds me. I forgot to give the two year-old colt his condition powders to night, an’ he’s been a wheezin’ all day,” and he hurried to the barn. ON THE SAFE BIDE. “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t know you, and therefore cannot cash that check for you,” said the cashier. “Well, I don’t see why this letter won’t identify me. You are too careful altogether.” “Well, I can’t do it, as I said before, unless you bring some one to identify you. I want to be on the safe side.” “You want to lie on the safe side, do you, young man ? Well, if I were you and so anxious to be on the safe side, I would start at once for Canada;” and he left chuckling to himself and thinking that he had made that durned upstart feel mean A FAST LIFE. “There goes a man who leads a fast life.” “Is he rich ?” “No, he only gets 875 a month.” “Then he must steal to lead a fast life on that income ?” “Oh, no; he’s a railroad conductor.’ Graphic. REFINEMENT OF CRUELTT. “If yon should marry a coachman, and I had my way, do you know what I would do with you?” asked a mamma of her daughter. “No; I don’t know that I do.” “Well, I’d make you live with him, I would.” “Mamma, do yon know what I’d do, if I hail my way ?” “No, I don’t” “Well, I’d be just cruel enough to him to compel him to live in the house with his mother-in-law.” - The Beason.—There is complaint among merchants, says a Western pa per, of a scarcity of SI and SI bills, and the reason is said to be because there was no appropriation made for printing more of them. There are probably enough already printed, but just now, right after harvest, they have ai! been paid in on subscriptions to country pub ! lishers, who have not yet paid them out. They will soon get into circulation again. Editors don’t keep money ! salted down lone Father (to daughter going out topost some letters)—“Yes. my dear, mail the 1 notes, but don’t note the males.” W“. , S