Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

NEW Davis The lightest running Shuttle Sewing Machine ever produced, combining greatest simplicity, durability and speed. It is adapted to a greater va riety of practical and fancy work than any other. No basting ever required. For particulars as to prices. &c„ and for any desired information, address THE DAVIS SEWING MACHINE CO., WATERTOWN, N. Y. 158 Tremor t St., Boston, Mass. 1223 Chestnut St., Philadelphia, Pa. 113 Publio Square, Cleveland. Ohio. <*■-45. 48 & 50 Jackson St, Chicago, 111. For M&le in Bninmerville bj J. 8. CLEGHORN & CO. ALABASTINE A Superior Substitute for Kalsomine, etc Alnbastine is the first and only preparation made trim c dcined gypsum rock, for appli cation io walls with a brush, and is fully eov i-. . - .i , .-;e.| by many’.wars ' ... . , ujg os many coats as des red. one over another, to any hard surface, without danger of scaling, or noticeably aiding to the thickness of tho wall, winch is strengthened and improved by each additional coat, from time to time. T. ■ls the only material for the purpose not <!?. jiendem upon glue for its adhesiveness. At imstiue is hardened on the wall by age, moisture, etc., while ail kalsomines or whit- Wittig preparations have inert soft chalks and glue for their base, which tire rendered soft or scaled in a very short time. In addition to tho above advantages. Aiaiuisiine is less expensite, It requires but one-half the number of pounds to cover the same amount of surface with two coats, is ready for use by adding waler, and easily applied by any one. Fo ale by your Paint Dealer. Ask for C.K ui r containing Samples of 12 tints, mmitifactured only by the Ai.abisti.m-. Co., 1 U CmiKi'ii. Manuger,Grand Rapids, Mich- , v- PURE * KeadyForUse Clivcg., Terra Cottas end nil the latest la .uionable shades tor CUY COUNTRY OR SEASIDE. Warranted durable and permanent. Descriptive Lists, showing 32 actual si; .- .c. >ent on application- x • r>.e by the principal dealers, e.m. i and retail, throughout the Country. As; for them and take ho others. BOSS, TAYLOR & CO. C! EVELAND, OHIO. SANDS’ —* PATENT TRIPLE! A 4 X ? J** l * 3 jj J r 4 "ft kDU *7aa FREEZERX The only Freezer ever made haring three dietlnci tDOtior.x inside the can, thereby, clns» finer and smoother Cream than any other I uczer on the market. 300,000 in use. Catalogue and Price Liat bailed upon application. WHITE MOUNTAIN FREEZER CO., NASHUA, N. H. Aii Unpleasant Experience. An Oxfordshire vonijn met with an ; experience a few days days back which . should act as a warning to intending vis- j itors to lunatic asylums. The person m ' question journeyed to Littiemore, a vil- , luge four miles from Oxford, where i there is an asylum, with the intention of I visiting a female patient. The porter, , having admitted her, passed her on to j one of the matrons with the words “to visit a female patient ;” but the matron appears to have caught only the last words of the sentence, and a mistake re- B<. ted which caused the visitor a good deal of unpleasantness. Tue stranger was taken tn the top of the building, nu ll r the belief that she was going to see her friend, and then she was suddenly shut iuto an empty room, Shortly af terward a nurse entered, and, to theoon- Bb ruati. n of the visitor, at once pro ceeded to undress her. Protestations were unavailing, and the poor woman was strifp d and placed m a bath, after which she was forcibly put to bed. By this time the mistaken lunatic was, of couis--, in a frantic state of alarm, which only favored the belief that she was really a mad woman. Where this grue some farce might have ended it is not pleasant to contemplate; but by a lucky accident the mistake was discovered later in the day. and the uafortuna’e woman was set at liberty with profuse apulo gicb, @ljc -S’uinnuTuiUc (Bsijcttc. VOL XI. SUMMERVILLE. GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY-EVENING, JANUARY 6, 18S5. NO. 51. PUMPKIN PIES. Gentle stranger, let me ask, Did you ever stop to ba-k Id the atmosphere of cooking. When a maid* n fair is looking, Askancely from the depths Os her limpid, azure eyes— As she stoves in the big oven Those de Lioua pumpkin pies ? Ah. what ecstacir s appealing, As the ar<»mas gen ly srea.ing, P rmeate t e rural k tchen Whose coniines hold a fair witch in, Fascinating, dainty, ra e, To intoxicating eyes! ’Tis the maiden, flour laden, Manipulator of the pies. Pumpkin pies ! What memories rist Even to the sunny skies, As she opens to your eyes The big or* n she did shove in Tho edelicious pumpkin pies. Golden orbs of luscious glory I Never had the world a story Fairer to the hear of man, Ay ! to beans of mortal c an Than the, manuscript in yellow Hot and toothsome *d< alii your eyes, And I fain would long to spell, oh, Worldly bass— in pumj kin pies. Quarter, half, the whole, oh, give it 1 I could dwell in bliss and Eve it In an hour such as this, Ah. for eveimore I wis— Sitting in the pleasant kitchen Whose confines hold a fair witch Fascinating, dainty, rare, Ask noeiy ».lancing from her eyes, At me, ov r pumpkin pies. JBaby’s 13ank. “No,” said the engineer, as he stoou hr the signal to start, “I wasn’t always aii engineer. I wasn’t anything for a long time. “I had the knowlege in my head all the while, but it was lost under a heap of rubbish. What fools men are when left to themselves sometimes I Now, look at me. Would you say 1 ever was a tramp ?” A tram pl His white, muscular throat—white and wholesome under the ooal dost —his strong, well-knitted frame, clear eye and firm hand, denoted the name of pluck and courage—a practical woiker; not the idle, nerveless, relaxed object which is denominated a tramp, and is a blight on the lace of nature. No; this man was never a tramp, and we told him so. “But I was, gentb men,” he said. "J was not only a trump, but the worst kind of one; and I worked harder and miff red more to get into that condition timu 1 ever did to teach this.” And he looked proudly at the polished trimimu gs of his iron steed. “111 tell you how it was,” he sii 1, ‘ T was a tramp, no matter how I cane tc be so, or why. I lost my Lome, friends, self-respect, and went from bad to worse, but I had never broken the laws, nor wronged anybody but myself, when I fell in with some fellows who thought they had found a tool, and they had. “They said every man lias Ins price, and they oflered me mine. 1 agreed to take money and do the work. “It was tins, to bang about and get acquainted with tile lusi le of a home— ti e house of the richest man in the place—and to show them the way. They said I looked the most respectable for the purpose, “Gentlemen, you wouldn’t trust one of the gang with a q larter, least of a 1 me as 1 looked then; hut I telt almost proud of the compliment, and that afternoon I was to go up to the house and look for work, or ask for food, just as it happened to strike me, and when there was no one at home but the women-toiks, and look around to see how we could get in that u>ght; fur rob. bing, and perhaps murder, was what they meant. “It >yas just such a pleasant, peaceful afternoon as this, and all the doors and windows were open, and not a soul saw me as I lounged in through the garden and up to the Verandah. “The gang I had fallen in with had male one mistake—they had kept me sober enough to make me feel thrt we were doing a dastardly tr ck; to make me, t -r the fi st time in many a dav. as vatned of my own company. But I had gone so far I must go on. “1 had walked up the steps and into the bouse without seeing a soul, and I stepped into along, cool room, and there I saw, on the mantle shelf, in a great gold-framed glass, a white face, and two I red, bloodshot eves—my own, but what a fright they gave me! and then I saw something else—a small iron bank such as children keep cents in. “It was made of latticed bars of wr light iron, and between every bar was the glitter of gold and silver coin : I hadn’t a cent in my pocket, was hungry, tired, footsore, and disgusted with what I bail undertaken. It came over me I like a fl uh that I conld take this money and get out of the gang; it would be dis honesty, but not such as this they had planned. “I reached out my hand, and stopped. “There, at my very feet, on a white lace pillow, and all white and fluffy, like an angel, Jay the loveliest baby I ever saw in my life. She was asleep; but as I I looked at her in startled wonder, she opened her eyes as wide and bright as daisies, held up both pretty hands, laughed like a bird singing, and Baid, . ‘Joe. Joe,’ which wasn't my name at aIL ; I didn't touch the bab v '; hand, and I & EMMONS, McKEE & C 0„, SUCCESSORS TO EMMONS. EADS & CO. 87 BIEdC-A-JD STREET, ROME, O-7L. Clothing, Furnishing ibois, Hats and Men’s Fine Sheas. Our stock of Men’s Wear thi« season excels anything ever shown in Rme. We want every man in Cherokee cn’tnty to give ns a oi’l thi’ i'll ai I we will save you time and m >ney. Ttiis mav seem like big talk, but our immense stock, bought at extremely lew prices, warrants us iu making broad asser tions. Ours is tee only establishment in Rome where is sold everything worn by the MALTC SEX —OR BOY. For Good Goods, Correct S’vles and Seasonable Prices, we are ACKNOWLEDGED HEADQUARTERS, A careful comparison cannot feil to convince you of this tact. We will appreciate a call. EfZMJNS, MEE 4 W., Men's and Bays'Orfta, 87 Broad Street, ROMS. Q . didn’t trw.ch t-be bany. “While I stood there, a little pale wo. man came out of her room, and nearly fainted when she saw me, and 1 sat down there and told the story, and asked | her to have me Bent, to prison for pro- I teotion for myself and others. “She went for her husband, and all ■ tlie time we were talking the baby laughed and cooed, and called me by the name she gave me—’Joe;’ and the rest of the gang were waiting at the turn of the road for me to come back to them.” “She must- be quite • large girl, now ?” “I didn’t give them up; it was not worth while, when I had put the people they had designed to rob on guard; they left the town that night, and didn't go to prison. “The man whose house was to be robbed gave me some work, but 1 didn’t reform all in a minute, and he never could reform me at all; it was the baby who did it. She trusted me. “When I found my evil iaclinations were getting the better of nuu I went to the bnby and she smiled on me. I grew strong light off ; it made a man of me. “I never could tell what the baby saw in my face to make her help me iu this way; but it wasn’t of this worliL She knew she could save me, and she did it. •‘That was ten years npo, gentlemen, und I am more of a man to-day than 1 ever was, and it is her doing.” “Shi- must lie quite a large gL'l, now,” we said. ‘ Maybeso; I don’t know how that is; some folks say they don’t reckon time j by mouths and years. “I’d like to feel that she’s the same sweet, smiling baby, holding out her hands in that confiding way, and cull mu that Bum : name; but 1 never wanted anyone to use the name since she said it the last time. “She was going to sleep, never to wake up, the doctor said; they told me she wouldu t know me, and that J would disturb her. “I went on my knees, and crawled up to the bed and looked nt her. “Dear child I she was us white as the sheets, and her pretty curls never stirred a hair, and her sweet eyes closed, and I groaned in my heart, fur I thought slm was gone; and then she opened hei oyis, and there came a great struggle for breath, and oh 1 I’d have died t< help her, and she just looked at me. and pnt one hand up—l fancied she jiointed up there —and she smiled on me, and says she, all at once. ‘Joe I Joe I’ and then she made her mother understand sho wanted something. “It was the little bank, and she wanted me to have it. I took it to humor her, and thought I’d give it back to her when she got well. “And then she smiled again, and I listened to hear her say ‘Joe,’ and all was still. “You see, I never could do wrong now; but how did she know about that little bank and my wicked thoughts ? “And she forgave and loved me too, pretty dear. The smoke makes me cry. There’s the signal. Good-day, gentle men. ” Did Not Object. Ma “I have my donbts about Mr. Grayfellow, my dear, and wish you had not said ‘yes’ before consulting me.” Daughter—“ Why, what is the matter with him?” “He has no trade, business or profes sion that I can discover, and has cer tainly no expectations, as his relatives are all poor.” “But, ma, just think what a good hus band he will make. There won’t be a quarrel from one year’s end to the other.” “You think bo now, no doubt.” “Oh ! but ma, lam sure of it He is bo amiable.” “Perhaps his amiability has not been | tested.” “Ab! but it has. Yon know how most men dislike parents-in-law. ” “Yes.” “Well, he said he would not object at all to living with you and pa.”— Phila. Call. Inbtblctor in logic to Mr. H.—B' what method of reasoning do you infer ! that a bullet io Lot after it strikes s> i target? Mr. H.—By picking it up, sir. MAJOR BILKLXS. THE CONFIDENCE GAME THAT WAS WORKED ON AN UNBUcI'ECIING STRaNGE II. It was a sunny day in July. I was j lately home from a lengthened sojourn in Bombay, and had been to the India office to see one of the i.fliuia's iibcut my furlough. I had two or three hours to spare before my train—l lived at S v n onks—and I didn’t snow how to employ ‘lie time. Irresolute I stood at the corner of the haymarket, not having nude up my mind which Way to go. I hadn't stood there a second when I felt a hand laid upon my arm and saw at my side a very good-looking, weli-dnsnd num. “My dear fellow,” he said, "how are you ?”' I didn’t know but what I knew the man, for one meets so many people of his kidney ; and, for slight I could tell, I might have beeu hospitably entertained by,him somewhere or other up the coun try, so that I didn't like lo confess my ignorance of his name and quality. And we walked cordially together toward Hl. Martin’s church. “When was the last time we met?” said my new friend. "Surely at the governor-general's ball at Calcutta.” “Never was at Calcutta tn niy life,” I said; “mine’s the Bombay pn sideucy.” “And I've been talking to yon all this time for Col. S u>op. Is it possible that I am deceived.” With a slight degree of acerbity I re plied that l was no colonel at ail, but a mere civil servant. I “Mo-it wouderlnl !” cued my friend. I “Never was such an extraordinary re seinLLince. Pardon the unconscious liberty I’ve tale n.” Well, we were very polite to each other. M j Bilkins, it appeared, was the man’s name. He was un agreeable fellow, and we walked on together in a veiy amiable way. Bukins hoped I’d come and look him up nt- his litlle place in Surrey, and I gave hmi my curd and -aid I'd be glad to see him at Seven 0 ills. “And what are yon going to do now ?” said the niujor. “Como and lunch with me. What do you Bay to going into the city and having a bit of fish togeth er? 1 know a capital place—Ohuffiu’B, close to Billingsgate, and handy for our trains. T<ke tin penny boat from Hungerford, eh ?" I willingly agreed. The tide was well up, and we had a pleasant sail down river. There, is no more charming vista (han iliat from Hungerford bridge. We 1 mded close to London bridge, and the major introduced me to Chuff- ! in's. We had no end of fish of the very best. But the mij t seduced me into < x rrivugai.ee. A pint of champagne with our firn, s.ian brown sherry, and, to wi d up, some capital iced punch an iniquitous sort of proceeding for a man wliohad a larnny dinner awaiting him at 7; but 1 got into the spirit of the thing, somehow, and the major’s con vernation was redly quits interesting. “I most have now," said the major, calling the waiter and picking out a nine ■ penny cigar. He took a handful of i charge out of his pocket. “Yon 11 al low me to settle for this little afl'air ?” “Couldn’t think of it,” I said, warmly, “not oiuany account.” “Oh, nonsense I W 11 I won’t press it,” he said, seeing J was determined, i “Let's see, two-and-six, five, seveu-aud- j six and six for the waiter, 8 Bhibings a I piece; shall I settle ? ’ “Do, if you please," I laid handing i my friend half a sovereign. Tne major gave me a 2 shilling piece ' and lounged away to the little desk where they took the money, made his financial arrangements, and vanquished with 8 parting wave of the hand. For myself I confess that I felt a little muddled with the good things of which I had partaken. I ordered * brandy and-soda and a screw of tobacco, ami indulged in a long clay pipe. Presently, as the time for my train approached, I kn ickel out the ashes of my pipe aud inu ie my way to the door. “I have to pay for a braady-and-soda and tobacco, ”s nd L “Y-s, sir,” su'd the waiter, who hov ered aliont tochec'; off ih •’• • -. ‘and two dinners, cil mio-i-pie. ■ i i i.-uli —lB -hillings, it you pie.'. , Sir.” “B-ut,” I remonstrated, ‘my friend paid for all that.” “I beg your pardon, sir,” said the young woman at the desk; “he hit word, sir, that yon would settle for everything.” Well, they wouldn’t let me go without paving, and I wont home rather crest fallen. I wrote to Major Biikins, at Blickley Park, Surrey, but my letter came back in duo course marked in red and other colored inks nil over it: “Not known; try ” ever so many places. Oh, Major Biikins, I didn’t mind so much paying for your feed and giving yon a little pocket money, but it was rather too bad to hand me for change out of my halt sovereign a florin that proved to boa “duffer.” IlnuFehold Hints ami Helps. Tender turnips cooked thus make a good entree; Put into a pan six ounces of butter and a tablespoonful of flour simmer these over a quick fire until they become slightly brown. Add a gill of boiling water, then six ounces of raw bam cut into dies, a little salt and pep per, one onion, a little parsley, aud four or five small turnips cut iuto small bits. Cover the sauce-pan, and let this cook until the turnips are done. Carrots are also cooked in this way, and the season ing is sometimes removed and the vege table served without it. A most appetizing salad is made by shaving cabbage about as fine as it is possible to shave it, sprinkle white mus tard seed over it, using enough so that there will be a distinct mustard flavor. An ounce of seed to one small head of cabbage will do; one or two yellow pep pers should be cut into very email slices and added; pour cold vinegar over all, add a little salt and sugar, and then let it stand for a day or two, so that the i cabbage and pepper are really pickled. This may be packed in jars or put into cans aud kept all winter. It is nice with oysters or with cold meats. The old fashioned way of stewing i pumpkin is done away with forever. A woman of an investigating turn of mind, I tried baking the pumpkin. She cut it ; iuto several pieces and set it into tho i oven. When soft she took it out, scraped all tho pumpkin from the shell, rubbed it through a colander, and there it was fine and light, absolutely free from lumps. Dried pumpkin used to form an important part of the winter’s stores, and those of us who are so fortunate as to remember the pies of our grand mothers, know that no other mole of preparing pumpkins for pies in winter is so excellent. It is very little trouble I after the pumpkin is baked and sifted, jto spread it on plates and dry it. It must be kept iu closely-covered jars, or it will become wormy. Pies made of apple butter are highly recommended. For one pie take half a cup—a good large half cup—of the but ter, one egg, half a cup of sugar, one third of a teaspoonful of allspice, and sweet milk to make the requisite quan tity for one pie. Bake with a lower crust only. > A South Carolina Ballot The Barnwell (3. 0.) People says that j the following qnaintaud curious indorse ment was found on the back of a Cleve land and H- ndricks ticket, cast at Barn well, Nov. 4: - “Grover Cleveland, stand up 1 A jury I of your countrymen have found you ! guilty of designing and conspiring wiih i divers Democrats to become President ; of the United 8 ates, to the great harm ! and personal injury of over 10 >,ODO loyal ! officeholders of the Republic. And more: You have caused auger, hatred, I ill-will, curses, aud maledictions tospritig up aud live among the hitherto united I Republican family of this country. “Your advocates have defended you with great zeal and ability; indeed, such zeal aud ability have never before been j known in the history of Presidential campaigns in these United States. “As the jury have recommended you to mercy, I make your sentence as leni ent as the law allows. “It is, that you, Grover Cleveland, be i confined at hard labor within the walls of the White House, in the city of Washingion, District of C alum 1 da, for the term of four long years. Aud mqy the Lord have merev ou your soul, ■ “Bring in Tom Hendricks." AN EPISODE ON FIFTH AVEXUE. A (worgeoiia F<i«*pnsr« , » tt stMnewque Tiger sui<l u i a•” Driver. An equipage whirled around tlie cor ner of Thirty-ninth street, New York, says a local paper, about 11 o'clock and dashed up Fifth avenue with a clatter and rumble that attracted the eyes of the spectators and brought a crowd of well-fed looking faces to the Union League Club’s windows. There was a team of blooded horses harnessed to an English vehicle that looked something like a mail phaeton. The horses were perfectly matched, beautifully built and mettlesome and fiery. Their necks were arched, aud as they threw their heads in the air the heavy chains that ran from the p -le to their collars rattled musical ly. The harness was gold plated, and the collars and reins were as white as snow. The phaeton had small wheels with many spokes and was bottle green in color. In the rumble behind sat a tiger in top boots and tight fitting coat. His arms were folded aud he held his nose high in the air. He seemed to be a part of the vehicle. Directly in front of him and on one side of the seat whs a benntifnl Scotch collie with silken ears and delicate paws. His nose was held iu the air, too, and he seemed like a statue, except for the softness of his coat. Beside him sat the driver. The toes of her tiny boots were pressed close to gelbcr on the foot rest ut the foot of the dashboard, aud she sat on her raised seat with an erec'ness that even the groom might have envied. It may be said that, her Andy chiselled nose was also held in the air. She was clad in an English jacket that fitted her superb form perfectly, and she kept her big eyes straight before her between the heads of her blooded horses. Ou her hands wire gloves with gauntlets that came above the elbow with a crest worked upon the buck of either hand. She held the reins well down aud bal- ■ aueed a long whip across them as the horses bounded along. As the team dashed across Fortieth ' street two girls, who were walking down I Fifth avenue, saw the fair driver and j one of tin rn waved her parasol and j stepped to the curb. The lady in tin i phaeton turned her horses toward the I curb and drew them up with an abrupt- ■ ness tint sent their heads four feet high • iu the air. The tiger slid from his place and stood at the horses’ heads and the driver exchanged n few words with the pedestrians. Then they all smiled and I nodded, the driver touched the horses I with the whip and the ligersprang aside l as they dashed up Filth avenue. He I jumped for the rumble, caught it by the merest chance, resumed his statuesque ' pose and folded his arms serenely. His ■ mistress never looked around to see if he was there, and the nose of the dog was still high iu the air. Tralii Pirates in Kansas City. The Kansas City Journal says: The cannon ball left the Union Depot on time and was whistled at the Bridge Depot by a switchman whose name could not be learned. When the train ; slacked up in the cut Engineer 0 Brien saw that the switch was not right and . signalled Conductor Langhorn to that ■ effect. Before his signal could be an swered, however, the train had gone on i the track reserved to the Hannibal and St Joe and a block was placed under i ihe wheels of the sleeper as soon as room t had been made to allow another train to i pass. This gave the impiession that the train had pulled out to allow a freight I to pass, and by this means the gang j which had the object of robbery were ■ ; enabled to accomplish their purpose. When a full stop had been mode some fifteen men sprang on board aud one of i them, with the usual call of “Change i | cars,” caused the passengers to leave 11 the train, and as the bewildered travel- I ers passed out one by one each was “held up” while their money and valu i ables were taken. How much the actu al 10-s is could not be learned, but from ! reliable sources it is estimated that the j' robbery could not have been less than s $5,000 aud may have been much heav f ier. The express car aud baggage were r not mol.sted, and the employees there f only knew of the trouble by hearing the j nibse of shots aud the exclamations ol i passengers as they were robbed. THE HUMOROUS PAPERS. WHAT WE FIND IN Til KIR, COLUMNS TO bMiLK OVER. A Giddy Younjr Thing— III* fiend wrr so l.igtH—A Hird tn tlir Hand—For Perfect Utt uiony— Wuh it Business Eye, Etc»« Etc. A BIRD IN THE HAND. “Well,” he said to the minister at the conclusion of the ceremony, “how much do I owe you ?” “Oh, I’ll leave that to vou,” was the reply. “You can better estimate the value of the service rendered.” “Suppose we postpone settlement then, say for a year. By that time I would know whether I ought to give you a hundred dollars or nothing.” “No, no,” said the clergyman, who is a married man himself, “make it three dollars now." BOTH KNEW HEB FEELINGS. “What struck you as being Miss Fnsseufeather's strongest point?” asked young Orimsonbeak of young Yeast at the chib. “Well,” replied Yeast, rubbing his face at the thought of his recent exper ience with the lady in question; “her hand struck me about as forcibly as any thing I” ‘ Ah !” exclaimed his companion, who could remember a like experience; “you proposed to her, too, did you?” The same clove di I for both of them. Kongers Statesman. OOULD NOT STAND IT. Tlie adopted daughter of a North Carolina farmer ran away aud returned to the family hovel on the mountain. A neighbor looking for her stray cows came across her standing in the door, and accepted an invitation to enter. Looking around at the squalor and filth, she said: “I don’t see, Sallie, what made you leave them good folks, where every thing was so nice and neat.” “Wa’al," was the reply, “you see, I was just gorged with neatness.” SO VERY LIGHT. They were engaged. They had been engaged a long time, and the wild glamor of new love, with its sly hand squeezes and its soft sentiment, had given place to the sensible devotion of permanent affection. He was sitting on the sofa reading to her, and had pillowed his head on her shoulder. He read a while and then remarked: “Little one, am I heavy ?’’ “Oh, no; go on,” she replied, being interested in the story. “Don’t think such a thing. Your head’s as light as anything.” And he has been bothered ever since trying to make up his mind as to what she really meant. - IF ashington Hatchet BUSINESS CHANGES. Two gentlemen met on the street “Still in the hardware business?” asked one. “No,” replied the other. “I have re tired from the hardware business and am trying to do a little something in Wall street” A year later they met again. “Still in Wall street?” asked one. “No,” replied the other. “I have re tired from Wall street, and am trying to do a little in the hardware busiuesu. ” A GIDDY YOUNG THING. The very venerable President Barnard, of Columbia College, was showing the fine new library of that institution to a party, one component pJNt of which was a giddy young thing. She was duly impressed by the high forehead and white hair and head of the man of knowledge, aud was charmingly defer ential and attentive to his remarks. Tue library is a magnificent hall, and the books are in shelves around the sides, the upper ones reached* i>y bal conies. “We have a floor space almost a hun dred feet square,” said Dr. Barnard, with some enthusiasm, “entirely un hrokou by post or pillar.” The girl looked down at the expanse of smooth flooring. To her mind there was only one Worthy use of such facil ities. “Doctor,” she naively asked, “when do you give the first ball ? I vow I must have an invitation.”— Louisville Post. A HARMONY TOO PERFECT. A fashionably dressed lady, accom panied by a distinguished looking gen- ‘ tieman, called at the office of a promi nent Austin lawyer, who asked: “What can I do for you ?” “I want toobtain a divorce from my husband here,” said the lady. “And I want to obtain a divorce from her just us badly as she does from me,” said the husband. | “Where such perfect harmony of sen timent exists between husband ami wife the law provides no adequate remedy. You had better go back and live to gether until you disagree with each other more than you do at present, and then perhaps I can do something for you.”— Texat Siftinge. A SALE—NO ALE. •‘Ah, good morning,” said the pro prietor of the saloon, as a gentleman en tered the door and looked hesitatingly around, “what can I do for you this morning? Have some Bass’ ale, fresh and ” “No,” interrupted the gentleman; “I’ll have some Sheriff’s sale,” and he pinned the necessary notice on the wall.— ln trait Post. Mr. Douglas, the great English ship-builder, says that the Great East ern was a trifle ahead of her time in size, but not muoh. All experience has shown that the large ship is safer and more profitable than the small one. Only one captain and one set of officers is required, let the ship be ever so large, and I presume that ships of 20,000 tons will in the future be as com mon as are ships of 5,000 tons at pres ent. The limit in the United States is the depth of water. Your harbors are for the most part shallow, and so far as New York is concerned the limit tA '3 J draught has been reached.