Newspaper Page Text
CLIPPINGS FOR THE CURIOUS.
Half cents were issued from the
United States mints for half a cen
tury.
Manhattan Island, on which the
great city of New York is built, was
once sold for $22.
The first wedding in America was
that of Edward Wilson and Susannah
White at Plymouth, in 1621.
It was not until 1828 that Turkey
and Persia agreed to exchange priso
ners according to the custom of Chris
tian nations.
It is said that in the works of Shake
speare there are more than 550 quota
tions, allusions, references and senti
ments derived from the Scriptures.
Sandwiches are a great staple in Lon
don. Forty thousand women are dai
ly engaged in vending them, not to
mention the thousands who assist in
their preparation.
Yellow hair was in years gone by
regarded with iil favor, and esteemed
a deformity. In ancient pictures and
tapestris both Cain and Judas are rep
resented with yellow beard.
There are evidences that copper
mines were worked in this country by
the mound builders. The first copper
mines worked in the United States
were chiefly in New Jersey and Con
necticut.
The operation of the mechanical ap
pliances in a watch factory have be
come so rapid and systematic that it
is possible to take the raw materials
from stock in the morning and have a
watch running from them by noon.
To quiet a baby roaring with colic,
lay it on its back and pat it from its
neck downward over its little abdo
men, taking care not to pat upward.
This usually not only brings relief to
the infant, but to the family and the
neighborhood.
The Abyssinian alphabet consists
of 208 characters, each of which is
written distinctly and separately. The
labor required to write an Abyssinian
book is, therefore, immense, and some
times years are consumed in the pre
paration of a single volume.
The Clown's Days Ended.
“It is a sad fact,” mournfully said a
veteran circus manager, “but it is be
yound dispute that the days of the
joke-cracking and song-singing clown
are over. He expired when the doub
le ring circus came into vogue. In
his place the horse-play of pantomimic
Grimaldi arose.”
“How diil the double ring kill the
Witty down?” asked a reporter for the
Mail and Express.
“The vast audience could not hear
him. The miles of canvass the am
phitheatre, tilled with 10,000 people,
made the great lung power necessary
to bo heard an utter impossibility.
The large railroad travelling circuses
have nothing but pantomimic clowns.
In the small shows, where actors are I
few ard something must be done to I
fill in the time for the acrobats or ;
whatever they may be to rest, before
they appear in some other daring feats
under other dazzling names, the song-
Singtng, punning clown is used. Hut
he is fast going out for other reasons.
The newspapers and almancs contain ■
nearly all the jokes and puns, and to ‘
repeat them in the ring over and over :
again becomes monotonous and tires !
even those who do not read. Then to i
supplant this, horse-play was inven- |
ted.”
“What do you mean by horse-play ?” I
“Broad humor. For instance, the i
down sticks a needle in a chair, and |
the ringmaster innocently sets down I
on it. That kind of fun tickles the I
audience; they see it, and understand .
the point made, but it is not so with a
pun or joke. I was a clown before I
became proprietor, and 1 know all the
inside tricks of the profesh. When I
travelled in small towns of 8,000 and
lOJkK) inhabitants 1 always managed
to pump some garrulous man in the
town before the performance, so as to
get off a local gag. This always
pleased the audience, and occasion illy
caused a row if the ‘gag’ was at the ’
expense of some fellow in the audience, ,
Then I would sing a song, and hear all !
the little boys in the streets singing it I
afterward; there was some glory in
that. But now the clown must be a
first-class tumbler and a good panto
mimist to succeed. He sinks his in- I
dividuality with some ten or
fifteen others, who come out i
caparisoned in caps and bells.
The lines are drawn and the
old order giveth away to the new.
Grimaldia’s mask has more fun in it
th, n Dan. Rice’s double entendre :
jokes. Sic transit gloria mundi.”— l
A'rw York Mail and Express.
The Tramp's Little Joke.
“What are you looking for?” asked
Farmer Furrow of a tramp who was
prowling around the kitchen early one
morning.
“Oh, I was only looking for work.”
“Ah, yes. I see; trying to get up
an appetite for breakfast, eh?”
"Well, not exactly.”
“What, then?”
"I was trying to get a breakfast for
my appetite.”— New York Journal.
An agriculturist at Oakland, Cal., is
making an effort to introduce the cul
tivation of tea in that State. lie has
over 2000 tea plants in a very thriving
condition, and when they arrive at the
age of four years he will obtain Japan
ese labor and pick and cure. He has
also a number of camphor trees that
are growing well
Wye
VOL. XII.
Two Tableaux.
MOTHKB AND CHIU).
I.
Two littla dimpled, rose-bud feet.
As the apple blossoms sweet,
Nestled in one loving hand
Where bright sea waves kissed the sand,
Long ago!
Two little hands like rose leaves lay,
Two little hands all pink and white,
On a warm breast as fair as they;
Like the tinted sea-shell bright,
Long ago!
Two merry, glad, wide-open eyes
Looked up with wondering sweet, surprise
Into two mirrors, faithful, true, through
Which mother eyes looked fondly through,
Long ago!
Two pretty, pouting, pink-pearl lips,
Peach-tinged, like toes and linger tips;
Two Ups of richer, riper red
On love's warm kisses sweetly ted,
Long ago!
A precious, helpless lump of elay
In which a pure, bright spirit lay,
Waiting the mother's watchful eye
To train it for the “by and by,”
Long ago!
* • • • •
CHILD AND MOTHER
11.
Two wrinkled hands like dead leaves lay,
Soft folded o’er a breast of clay;
I'wo wrinkled, bony, bare, brown hands,
Where sea waves kiss the crystal sands,
Now as iheni
Two tired, tired feet, all thin and worn—
On life’s rough rocks oft bruised and torn;
Two weary feet too weak to go
Ou life’s pathway to and fro,
Now as then!
Two tearless eyes close veiled from light,
’Neath soft fringed lids ol pearly white;
Two love-lit eyes, deep, tender, true,
No more the mother-soul looks through,
Now as then!
A precious, lifeless lump of clay
From which the soul hath passed away.
A loving woman, tender, sweet.
Kisses the face, the hands, the feet,
Now as then!
Detroit Free Prctn.
THE ADMIRAL’S HORSE.
As every one knows, Admiral Van
Ruyter’s fame was world-wide ami
well-deserved, a fai t which naturally
caused much envy and jealousy. The
generals in the army were particularly
unpleasant toward Ruyter, and tried
in every way to vent their spleen
against him. At last they devised a
trick by which they thought to make
Ruyter ridiculous in tho eyes of others.
Once when his vessel was lying at
anchor, and Ruyter had gone to Am
sterdam, where he was the admiration
of young and old, one of the generals
Invited him to dinner in company
with all the principal officers and no
bility of the place.
After dinner, the host proposed that
they should go to his summer resi
dence, some three or four miles out of
the city, to drink coffee and smoke,
and accordingly horses were ordere I
to carry the guests thither.
The general knew perfectly well
that Ruyter had never been on a
horseback in his life, and did not know
how to manage a horse, so he thought
it would be a splendid opportunity t.o
take his revenge on the poor admiral
by alloting him the most high-spirited
and unmanageable horse that could be
found.
Although Ruyter did not care about
mounting the animal, yet he made no
remark, as he saw that no carriage was
to be had.
The company of horsemen went
quietly through the town, and for a
time all went well in spite of the
sailor’s uneasiness, which was visible to
everyone and caused much amusement.
Soon, however, the animal next to that
of the admiral, on which the general
was m Hinted, began to trot, and finally
went off into a gallop, the poor, un
fortunate Ruyter's beast followed suit.
His hat fell off, but he held on by
both hands to the saddle, and grasped
the horse with his knees as tightly as
he could. But it was all in vain, and
presently he was thrown to the
ground, where he lay smothered in th :
dust.
Had his companions not respectel
the feelings of the fallen man, they
would doubtless have burst into peals
of laughter. Happily, Ruyter was
uninjured by his fall, and able to pro
ceed to the house on foot. However,
although his share eyes soon preceive 1
by the expression on the faces of the
company that his misadvantage had
been preconcerted with a view to mak
ing him appear ridiculous, he wisely
refrained from giving vent to his con
jectures; so before the company sepa
rated, when he had driven back to the
•ity in a hired vehicle, he invited them
all to a feast on board bis vessel
When the guests arrived on tho ap
pointed day they found ihe fleck con
verted into a garden, tastefully deco
ated with plants and ferns, and a can
opy covered tie whole. Down the
centre of the deck was a table, already
laid. The yards and,every corner of
the vessel were manned by the sailors
dressed in their Sunday best, who
gretted every fresh guest with a thun-
SUMMERVILLE. GEORGIA, WEDNESDAY EVENING. AUGUST 12,1885.
dering hurrahl In order to make tho
entertainmet In no way inferior to
that given by the general, Ruyter had
provided musicians, who played dur
ing the feast
The meal being ended tho n 1 ’’■al
rose from his seat, filled his glass, and
requested every one to do tho same.
On their all rising he cried out—
“ Drink to the health of the States Gen
eral; to the welfare of our Fatherland,
and of its army and navy.”
At that moment, as if with one
stroke, a hundred and twenty cannons
were discharged under the feet of the
assembled guest, The ship tottered
and trembled in every beam, and
whilst the naval officers stood as firm
as rocks, all the the military officers
were precipitated to the deck.
Ridiculous as the spectacle was, no
one laughed, though tho inclination to
do so must have been very strong.
When the pale and punished guests
were assisted to their feet, the admiral
stepped up to the general, and smiling
said in a tone loud enough for every
one to hear, “Dat is myn paard?”
which we may translate, “that is my
horse.”— Berlin Zeitung
Tho Preacher was Surprised.
An English lady had occasion, some
time since, to travel without escort
from Suffolk to London, and she was
forced to take a train on which there
were no carriages reserved for the la
dies.
“There is a compartment occupied
only by the Rev. Mr. Spurgeon,” the
guard said in answer to her expression
of disappointment,” “perhaps you do
not object to riding with him.”
The lady acquiesced, and according
ly was so placed.
An inquiry on the part of the rev
erend gentleman in relation to tho
window opened the conversation, and
presently the two travelers were dis
■ coursing amicably upon general top
' les. At length they reached Mr. Spur
: geon’s native village, where the train
paused a few minutes.
“I presume, madam,” the gentleman
observed with genuine enthusiasm,
“that you have heard of Spurgeon, the
great preacher. This village has the
I honor of being his birthplace.”
He went on from this text, drawn
out somewhat, it is true, by the lady,
and praised himself most unsparingly,
declaring Spurgeon to be the greatest
divine in all England. When London
was reached, he politely assisted the
lady into a cab, and was bidding her
good-bye, when she said:
“I thank you very much for your
kindness, Mr. Spurgeon.”
“Surprise, chagrin and anger all
painted themselves upon the face of
I he other, but he apparently struggled
; to maintain his countenance and his
temper. Striking himself melodra
i manually upon the chest, ho exclaim
ed:
“Down, temper! Down temper,
down!”
And turning upon his heel he left
her abruptly.— New York Tribune.
Mr. Beecher on a Higher Life.
“Men of an ordinary morality are i
Irrigated by mechanical appliances, as
it were,’’said Mr. Beecher at Plymouth
Church, “while Christian men are I
refreshed by the rain dropping from
heaven. They live in an atmosphere
and with an inspiration of feeling that
does not belong to those that are not
Christians.
“The full Christian lives in a higher i
realm than any other men. He lives i
where the best part of his life is un- i
■seen. It is the realm of imagination,
of affection, of divine inspiration, a
realm where the inshining of God’s I
nature raises a thousand beautiful im
ages which cannot be told of.
“Men say in regard to these higher ,
fanciful experiences, as they call them, I
that they are dreams. lam sorry for ;
the man to whom they have never
come.
“Men are so bound up in the practi- ,
cality of the lower life that they don’t
be.ieve in a higher life. It is poetic, | '
they say, as if poetry itself were not
the higher form of truth, or might be.
“Every deep soul has within it self a
threshold over which no foot may I
tread, and the most sacred feelings are
those that are never exhibited, not
< ven to the choicest and dearest. Are '
there no such cavernous crystalline
haunts within you?”
“Such a Nice Name.”
Upon one occasion when Artemus
Ward was in London, a children’s par- I
ty was arranged by the great humor- |
ist, and to which one of the sons of j
John Bright was invited. The boy
returned home aglow with delight. j
“Well,” said the English statesman to i ,
his son, “did you enjoy yourself, my ‘
boy?” “Oh, indeed, I did,” exclaimed : (
the little Bright, “and Mr. Ward gave
me such a nice name for you. papa.” ,
“What was that?” inquired the father.
“Why, he asked me how that gay and
festive cuss, the governor, was,” replied ■
the child.— Brooklyn Magazine.. i
TOWED BY A SEA MONSTER
A Shark Twelve F'eet High
and Seventy Feet Long.
The Thrilling Adventure of Some fisher
men in a Frail Ounce.
“We were fishing near the Seychelle
Island. All at once there appeared,
about five hundred yards from the
boat, a shark. I should guess it was
at least sixty foot. It didn't seem to
notice us, but kept right along, and
finally the canoe ran right alongside,
and hauling off the man let him have
it right behind the side fins, and at
tho same minute the men dug their
paddles into the water and away tho
canoe went, and I tell you, my boy, it
was just in time to save our bacon, as
the moment the iron struck, the fish
seemed to rise like aWg island right
into the air. I never saw such a sight,
and when it came down you’d have
thought the bottom had fallen out of
the ocean from the whirlpool it made,
and a wave struck us that would
have knocked an American boat all to
pieces, but as it was we seemed for a
moment to shoot into the air, fell back
with a crash, and then came the yell
of the man for the rest to look out for
line; but in tho confusion it took a
turn about a paddle and jerked it and
the man overboard quicker than I can
think of it, and talk about hissing
rope. I’ve been foul of some lively old
whales in my time, but it wasn’tnothing
to this. The line fairly played tunes
and hissed and smoked like a steam
engine, we a-pulling’ after it as fast as
we could, and it was a good thing we
did, as in a few seconds the fish had
taken all the slack, and there came a
jerk that sent every man to the bot
tom of the boat and I nearly overboard,
and I thought the planks had been
torn clean out of her.
“At first her bow went under, and
when the man climbed aft she was half
full of water and going along at a rate
that almost tore the buttons off your
coat from the friction. It was a lucky
thing for us that there was no sea on,
or we should have filled In no time
but as it was, we got her head up in
the air, and off we went, asking no fa
vors of anyone. We headed right out
to sea, a matter of four miles, and then
it changed again and struck in shore,
and when about a mile off the beach
we took in the slack, so we got a lance
into him, and I let him have four or
live bullets about the head, and, to
make a long story short, after a Hurry
that beat anything 1 ever saw, tho
shark gave up and rolled over, and we
got lines on, and after an hour’s hard
pulling got it aground, and at ebb tide
it was high and dry.
“Talk about fish—it looked more
like a big whale than anything 1 ever
saw. It was about twelve foot high
and about seventy foot long. The
mouth wasn’t on the under side, and ■
it had teeth hardly larger than a cod- i
fish, and in its throat a curious whale
bone like arrangement. I believe they
call ’em ‘gill-rakers,’ but they wore
used just about as a whale uses its
bone—small food is taken into the
mouth and kind of strained through
the ‘rakers’ anil so into the throat. The
natives cut it up and got about ten
barrels of oil, so that the fish paid
about S2OO.” — Philadelphia Tinies.
He Got the Pass.
A good story is told of a certain
prominent railway director, who is '
equally renowned for his ability to
take or make a joke. A railway em
ploye whose home is in the country
applied to hirn for a pass to visit his
family.
“ You are in the employ of the com
pany?” inquired the gentleman allud
ed to.
“ Yes.”
“ You receive your pay regularly ? ”
“ Yes.”
“ Well, now, suppose you were work
ing for a farmer instead of the com
pany, would you expect your employer
to take out his horses every Saturday
night and carry you home?”
This seemed a poser, but it wasn’t.
“ No,” said the man, promptly; “ 1
would not expect that; but if the ,
1 inner had his horses out, and was ,
going my way, I should call hirn a i
very mean fellow if he would not let
me ride.” <
The employe came out three minutes i
after with a pass good for twelve i,
mouths.— Detroit Free Press.
A Good Test.
“In my opinion, animals are color
blind.” ’
“I don’t believe it.”
“I do. I have been trying some ex- | ‘
periments which convinced me that I
• j j
none of our domes ic animals can dis i
tinguish colors.”
“Try another, and you’ll change
your mind.”
“What’s that?”
“Robe yourself in a red shawl and
walk through a field where a bull is 1
grazing.— Chicago Ledger.
Facts Ab«ut Carpets.
Wilton carpets were made for many
years before Brussels. It is probable,
however, that the Wilton of early
times was somewhat different in its
construction from that of the present.
Henry Herbert, ninth Earl of Pem
broke, introduced its manufacture in
1745, but the goods had been made
some time prior in France.
In 1755, English Axministers were
made. But it was not until 1749 that
a loom was constructed which would
produce a Brussels carpet, and just
here is an exceedingly interesting
anecdote, which has been handed down
from father to son as au inviolable
truth:
During 1730 and 1735, John Broom
traveled through Tournay and Brus
sels, studying tho stitch which was
then known as Brussels stitch. In
Brussels, particularly, weavers were
at that time making a carpet named
after the town—the Brussels carpet.
Broom studied with much earnestness
the mystery of the manufacture, and
finally made the acquaintance, in Tour
nay, of a weaver understanding the
secret. He and this weaver Imme
diately repaired to England, and near
Mt. Skipet, Kidderminster, they put up
the first Brussels loom, 1749. They
operated with absolute secrecy, but in
time their modus operandi was expos
ed.
Broom and his Belgian workman
labored night and day, and it being
known where their operations were
conducted, some enterprising fellow
climbed to the window, and night after
night, from his perilous perch outside,
he studied the operations of the me-1
chanism within, until he was able to I
carry away in his mind a model of the
Brussels loom. Then a second firm
and several others soon came into the
field, and in 1753 Kidderminster was
doing considerable in the way of Brus
sels.
Today there is hardly anything else
but Brussels made in Kidderminster,
and, odd as it may seem, there is hard
ly a yard of the original Kidderminster
carpet produced there.
How J. Wilkes Booth Looked.
Ben. Perley Poore says in his remi
niscences, published in tho Boston
Budget". John Wilkes Booth was, when
lie committed his great crime, 27 years
of age. He had played stock parts at
Washington and other southern and
western cities, where he had given un
mistakable evidence of genuine dra
matic talent. He had, added to his
native genius, the advantage of a voice
musically full and rich; a face almost
classic in outline; features highly in
tellectual; a piercing, black eye, capa
ble of expressing the fiercest and the
tenderest passion and emotion, and a
commanding figure and impressive
stage address. In his transitions from
the quiet and reflective passages of a
part to fierce and violent outbreaks of
I passion, his sudden and impetuous
manner had in it something of that
electrical force and power which made
the elder Booth so celebrated, and call
ed up afresh to tho memory of men of
the last generation the presence, voice
and manner of his father. Convival
in his habits, sprightly and genial in
conversation, John Wilkes made many I
friends among the young men of bis |
own age, and he was a favorite among j
the ladies at the National hotel, where I
he boarded.
His features in repose hail rather a
somber and melancholy cast, yet, under ,
agreeable influences or emotions, the
expression was very animated and
glowing. His hair, jet black and i
glossy, curled slightly and set off in ■
line relief a high, intellectual forehead
and a face full of intelligence. Both ■
chin and nose were markedly promi- j
nent, and the firm-set lips and lines j
about the mouth indicated firmness of
will, decision and resolution. He was |
scrupulously neat in his dress, and ;
selected his habits with a rare percep- ■
tion of what was becoming to his lig- ■
are and complexion. He would pass !
anywhere for a neatly but not over, i
dressed man of fashion.
Florida Saurian-.
Some interesting discoveries have I
been made in Florida by Prof. Law
rence Johnson, of the United States
Geological Survey. Just south of
Aluchua county line he found several;
specimens and skeletons of animals
which relatively belong to a not far
distant period. In piles, and somewhat
mixed, there were the remains of a
mastodon, two or three specimens ot
the rhinoceros, a large stag, a camel,
fully as large as the Arabian camel,
but in structure more allied to the
llama; also a tapir, very much like the
South American tapir, which lives in
swampy places; two teeth of some car- \
nivorous animal allied to the tiger and
panther; one set of teeth and bones of
a hippopotamus; several crodo tiles or
alligators, and innumerable other
b ines not identified. Apparently, tha
territory south of Aluchua was at
some time a large fresh-water lake
NO. 30.
COMMON SENSE IN EATING.
A Matter in Which Everyone
is Interested.
A Lady Subsisting on the Juices of Fruits
—The Real Cause of Old Age,
There is at this time so much con
flicting advice as to what we ought to
1 eat, those who are disposed to live on
hygienic principles are pretty nearly
put to their wits ends to know just
what course to pursue. Some one
finds himself benefltted by a particular
method of living, and forgetting how
much idiosyncrasy there is in these
matters he will at once advise every
body to follow his example. One
would have us abandon all meals,
others would live almost exclusively
on various preparations of the cereals,
still another would have us live wholly
on fruits. A late very interesting
case has been related, with the name
of the lady, place of residence, etc., in
the state of Connecticut, who has vir
tually eaten nothing for four years
During this time she has subsisted
wholly on the juices of fruits taken in
such scanty quantities as to be almost
inappreciable. “Physicians have stud
ied the case and have all alike been
puzzled and routed in their efforts to
master it.” A reporter of tho New
Haven News went to see the lady, ex
pecting to find her as thin as a shadow
and as bloodless as a turnip; but he
found her the picture of health. As
he expressed it: “.Slightly past middle
age, she seemed, indeed, a fine speci
men of the rugged old-fashioned New
England woman, used to out-door ex
ercise and younger in reality than the
average woman half a score years her
junior. Her eyes sparkled and the
flush of her cheek seemed the tint of
perfect health.” Previous to adopting
the peculiar diet described this lady
had been a terrible sufferer from dys
pepsia, but it seems that she has re
covered her health. Now, it would
not be strange if a school of philoso
phers should arise who would advise
us all to drop a mixed diet and live
wholly upon fruits. At least, such ad
vice would not be stranger than that
given by W. O. Dawson in a scientific
English periodical called Knolwedge.
Under the head of “The Possible Sus
pension of Old Age,” Mr. Dawson
says, “That the real change which pro
duces old age is, in truth, nothing more
or less than the slow but steady accu
mulation of calcareous matter through
out the system.” The arteries become
ossified, the heart’s valves become car
tilaginous, and all the living processes
become obstructed by the accumula
tion of earthy matters. Well, what
would Mr. Dawson havens do to avoid
this accumulation of calcareous matter
in the system ? According to his ad
vice we should ascertain what articles
of food contain the most of earthy salts
and avoid them. He says the cereals
have been found to be the richest in
earthy salts and that therefore, bread
Itself, the so-called staff of life, unless
used in great moderation, favors the
deposition of these salts in the sys
tem. “The more nitrogenous our
food,” this authority tells us, “the
greater its percentage in calcareous
i matter,” He thinks that fruit from
I its lack of nitrogen is best adapted for
■ suspending ossilic deposits. Old mut-
■ ton and beef contain a large quantity
of earthy matter, and he would have
.us consequently use more freely of
fish and poultry and of young mutton
and veal, forgetting apparently that
i the experiments tried on the stomach
of St. Martin have led us to believe i
that lamb and veal are much more dis- I
flcult to digest than old mutton or ■
I beef which are, indeed, preferable in |
j that respect to poultry and many kinds
I offish. He would have us drink dis
tilled water because ordinary water
has the earthy salts! He further advi
; ses us to take daily two or three tum
blers full of distilled water with ten or
fifteen drops of diluted phosphoric
acid in each glassful to retard the de
velopment of old age.— Health Month
ly.
Smoking Among the Puritans.
The early settlers of the Plymouth I
Colony were greatly addicted to smok- i
ing, which practice subsequently be- '
! came so common that the weed' was j
smoked in church dming service. This i
custom, it seems, soon caused consider- i
able annoyance, as the exercises were i
greatly disturbed by the clicking of I
flintsand steel to light their pipes, and j
clouds of smoke iu tlie church. Hence, ■
in 1669, the colony passed this law:—i
“It is enacted that any person or per i
sons that shall bo found smoking to- j
bacco on the Lord’s day, going to or j
coming from meetings, within two
miles of the meeting house, shall pay I
twelve pence for every such fault.” j
Under this law were fined Richard ■
Berry, Jedediah Lombard, Benjamin j
Lombard, and James Maker for smok
ing tobacco at the end of the Y'ar
mouth meeting-house on the Lord’s
day.— Hotel Register.
Childhood’s Faith.
llarasged by foolish doublings, borrt
Os pride in mental power,
I chanced to stray, one Sunday morn,
Beside a country bower—
A little cottage, creeper-clad—
And through the open pane
The Gospel story, sweet and glad,
Was told to mo again.
An aged dame read God’s own Word,
Spoke of His wondrous grace;
And all intent, two children
Faith written on each face.
And lo! I saw myself once more
Sitting at mother’s knee,
Reading the sacred writing’s o’er,
Trusting implicitly.
Oh, for the childlike fai’h of old,
That knew not doubt or fear,
That heard tho Bible stories told
And held them very dear!
God grant such faith to me again—
Tlie pure faith of a child—
To prison all my pride, and reign
With reason reconciled.
—G. Weatherly in the Quiver-
HUMOROUS.
A baker ought to be a dough- mestic
man.
The want of money is tho root of
much evil.
A bird on the toast is worth eighteen
in the bush.
A Court House—The home of mar
riageable daughters.
The meanest and most disagreeabl o
uncle is a carb-uncle.
The success of a church choir singer
is, after all, largely a matter of chants.
The crow is not so bad a bird. It
never shows tho white leather, and
never complains without caws.
Many musical instruments are now
made of paper. This is pleasant news
Paper is so easily destroyed, you know.
“Those birds on the new bonnets are
Immense,” said Mrs. Jones. “Yes,”
sighed her husband,” "especially the
‘bill’ part.”
In Bombay, husbands cut off their
wives’ noses for punishment. Th >
women in this country are too smart
for their husbands. They never talk
through their noses.
Emory Storrs, who ought to know,
remarks that ‘‘the average Chicago
man, who possess a ‘coat-of-arms’ to
day, probably wore the coat without
the arms twenty year’s ago.”
Immense crops of mustard aro pro
duced iu California, and several mills
have lately been established to work
up the product. This ought to “draw”
a good many settlers to California.
“Cabbages are better than gold,”
says a man who has tried both. “Yes.
but wo believe very few people wear
cabbage heads on their watch chains
for charms.” No, the usual place for
wearing cabbage heads, when they aro
worn at all, is directly under the hat.
Mrs. Langtry and the Cowboy.
Mrs. Langtry had been taught to
dread the cowboy as an incarnate fiend
to be fled from at all risks. On one oc
casion, when her servants had marched
off to the groggeries of the neighbor
ing settlement, she was quite alone in
her car, when there came a timid and
tentative knock at the door. She
opened it at once, anil there stood one
of the dreaded race, a gigantic leather
clad cowboy. His look was strange
and wild, but his words were meek
and mild. Extending his huge paw,
and raising his hat with the other, ho
said, “I guess, madam, you are Mrs.
Langtry. We are right glad to see
you in our part of the country.
There’s some of us boys who work up
in the mountains who don’t see a
woman, let alone a pretty one’ above
oncest or twice a year.” Mrs. Lang
try made a suitable reply, whereat the
cowboy grew bolder and said, “Might
1 jest ask you, madam, to wave your
handkerchief out of the window? You
see that little house down younder.
Wai there’s a girl there as I’m dead
gone on, and I kinder promised her
as I would get you to wave your
handkerchief to her. If you would
do this it might help me a bit.
Like any true woman Mrs. Langtry
had no objection to advance the cow
boy’s love affairs, and wave her hand
kerceief accordingly in the direction
indicated. He was profusely grateful,
but still not entirely happy. “I guess”
he went on, “you are a kind-hearted
lady. Now would you jest give me a
bit of old ribbon, or a glove you have
worn, or a torn handkerchief, to show
to the boys around as something that
once belonged to you?” There was
nothing for it, Mrs Langtry confesses,
but to give him a scrap of pink ribbon,
and then, after more thanks and ex
pressions of the devotion of the entire
territory, he stalked off.— London
World.
The Third Section Got Well.
When the great Majendie assumed
the professor’s chair of medicine at the
College of France, he thus addressed
the astonished students: “Gentlemen,
medicine is a humbug. Who knows
anything about medicine? I tell you
frankly, I don’t. Nature does a good
deal; doctors do very little—when
they don’t do harm.” Majendie went
on to tell the following pungent lit
tle professional tale out of school:
“When 1 was head physician at the
Hotel Dieu I divided the patients into
three sections. To one I gave the
regulation dispensary medicine in the
regulation way; to another I gave
bread, milk and colored water, and to
the third section I gave nothing at all.
Well, gentlemen, every one of the
third section got well. Nature invar,
ibly came to the rescue.”