Newspaper Page Text
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C|t planting ptoa
Morning News Building, Savannah. Ga.
TUESDAY. DEI EMBER 25. 1888.
Beattiered at the Past Office in Savannah
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INDEX TO NEW ADVEKTISEMENtT
Meetings— Oglethorpe lodge No. 1,1.0. O. F.
Special Notices— Notice to Water Takers. A.
N. Miller. Superintendent; As to Crew of British
Steamship Bellini; Roll of Honor, Savannah
Academy; Fireworks, Davis Bros.
Amusements- Miss Estelle Clayton at the
Theater; Christmas Races at Thunderbolt, Jos.
T. Doyle.
Sleamship Schedule— Ocean Steamship Com
pany.
Christmas Schedule— Coast Line Railroad.
Auction Sale— Fireworks, by J. McLaughlin
A Son.
Open To-Day—Art and Stationery Department
L. A B. S. M. H.
Fertilizers— Listers' Agricultural Chemical
Works, Newark N. J., Wm. R. Boyd.
Pianos and Oroams— Davis Bros.
Cheap Column Advertisements— Help Want
ed; Employment Wanted; For Rent; For Sale;
Reward; Lost; Miscellaneous.
The Morning News wishes all its patrons
and friends a merry Christmas.
Gen. W. T. Sherman rises up every now
and then to deny that he burned Columbia
and Atlanta. Well, during this Christmas
holiday, we will try to forget that he burned
them.
The Queen of England will not spend a
very merry Christmas. The Prince Consort
died just before Christmas of 1861, and since
that time the queen has spent the holidays
of each year at Osborne, and has denied
herself any Christmas pleasure.
Col. Bill Nye seems to think that Gov.
Gordon won’t interrupt Gen. Harrison’s
administration. Probably he won’t, but if
he should be sent to the United States sen
ate in a year or two, he might frustrate some
of the administration’s little schemes.
Various newspapers are talking about
what Gen. Harrison should do for ex-Presi
dent Hayes. The best thing that can be
done for Hayes is to let him remain at home
and attend to bis chickens. Gen. Harrison
cannot afford to uphold the fraud by which
Hayes was made President.
Minister Phelps distributed the prizes to
the students of the Westminster school the
other day, and the London representative
of the New York Tribune says of his speech
on that occasion: "Like all bis speeches,
this was notable fur its American quality.”
The Hon. Whitelaw Keid would have run a
blue pencil mark through that sentence if it
had been written prior to the election.
It begins to look as if Col Dudley would
escape indictment for writing the “blocks
of five” letter. Republicans in Indianapo
lis are said to feel confident that he will,
and their confidence is based on the fact
that the federal grand jury is composed of
a majority of republicans. The public un
derstands very well, however, that theinan
who bought Indiana in 1880 would not have
hesitated to buy it in 1888.
Ex-Congressman Wise and Gen. Mahono,
of Virginia, think that state will elect a re
publican governor next fall—that is. Wise
thinks it will if Mabone isn’t allowed to dis
tribute the federal patronage, and Mahono
thinks it will if Wise lsu’t allowed to dis
tribute the patronage. As there are only
two republican factions in Virginia, Gen.
Harrison probably will have a hard tim.<
•electing a dispenser of offices.
The newspaper man as a private secretary
seems to have come to stay. Mr. Cleveland
set the example of appointing newspaper
men to that position when he took Col.
Lament out of a newspaper office, and Geu.
Harrison has kept the ball rolling by in
vading an Indianapolis office. Now Mayor
Hart, of Boston, has selected a journalist
for that position, and it is probable that
after a while none but journalists will be
selected.
A conscience stricken Ohioan has sent $lO
to the state treasurer, to be added to the
conscience fund. He said he was once a
member of the Ohio legislature, and drew
stationery to the amount of $lO more than
be required. Home of the Ouioans assert
that they don’t believe be was a member of
the legislature, the reason for their opinion
probably being that no Ohio legislator
would be troubled with a conscience.
Probably they are light—they ought to
know.
Ex-State Senator Arkell, of New York, is
authority for the story that Mr. Deppw
would have been nominated for President
at Chicago if be had not made a martyr of
himself. It may look that’way, now that a
good many things connected with the
Chicago oouroution have become obscured,
but It certainly did not whan the oon veutiou
was In swdon. Mr. Depaw withdraw U>-
(Eum 1m saw that his nomination wss im
possible. A good many people thought be
eras vary foolish to enter the race.
Florida's Bright Prospects.
The late epidemic in Florida does not ap
pear to have hurt that state. The indica
tions are that she will have as many visitors
and immigrants during the coming year as
she has had in any previous year. Indeed,
there are reasons for thinking that the
travel on all the roads leading to Florida
; will be larger than ever before. The
Florida people are full of hope for the future
prosperity of their state, and are going on
with their improvements as energetically
and enthusiastically as if the yellow fever
had never paid them a visit. Capitalists are
investing their money freely in the state,
showing that their confidence in the state’s
; development and material progress is not
clouded by a doubt.
And why should the late epidemic check
Florida’s advancement? It was confined to
a small 'area. Only a few of her many
towns were afflicted, and only one of them
severely. There may never be another epi
demic of yellow fever within her limits. It
lis certain that greater precautions than
| ever will be taken to keep the jfever from
getting a foothold within her borders. The
legislature, which meets in April, will pro
vide for better quarantine regulations, and
every town will look more closely after
sanitary matters. The health! authorities
will administer with more care the trust
confided to them. The lesson taught by the
experience of the past summer will not soon
be forgotten.
Those who said Florida had received a
set-back from which she would not. recover
in years,'are already beginning to admit
they were mistaken. The rush of immi
grants and visitors to the state, and the
business activity everywhere noticeable
within the state’s limits, are a surprise to
them. They expected Florida would.!be
shunned, and that her business would not
show any signs of revival for a year or
more.
But why should 5 people hesitate to go to
go to Florida now? There is no danger to
health to be apprehended there. It is as
safe to go there as to any other state. The
local physicians have said that it is, and
t hey would not make a declaration of that
kind unless convinced of its truth. Hun
dreds of refugees have returned home and
hundreds of tourists and immigrants have
entered the state since’jthe epidemic in the
afflicted towns wns declared at an end, and
there has been no report that any one of
them has been attacked by the fever. What
better evidence is needed that the epidemic
is wholly a thing of the past?
The general manager of the Savannah
and Florida railway system has just; made
an inspection'tour through the state, going
as far south as Key West. His report of
the prospects for a busy and prosperous
season is a very gratifying one. ft He did
not find anylsigns of a feeling of depression
or hear any gloom vtforebodings. What he
saw and heard satisfied him that the Florida
boom was as promising as ever, and that
the people were not in the least dispiritod
by their recent misfortune. It may be ac
cepted as settled that Florida is going right
ahead, and that the coming year will be
one of the most prosperous in her history.
A Reform that is Here to Stay.
Congressman Spinola said in a debate in
the House the other day that at least three
fourths of the republicans and all the demo
crats of that body were opposed to the
civil service reform law. A vote was soon
after taken on the proposition not to make
an appropriation for the civil service com
mission. 138 voted in favor of the appro
priation and ouly 25 against it, thus
showing that an overwhelming ma
jority of the House was in
favor of enforcing the civil service
reform law. It is safe to say that at least
four-fifths of the people favor that law. If
Congressman Spinola will cut down his
shirt collar so that the voice of the people
can reach his ears he will be surprised how
greatly he has mistaken their sentiments
not only with regard to civil .ser
vice reform, but also other important
public questions. There are a few men in
public life who, like Gen. Spinola, think
the opinions they entertain are those of the
(teople, and it does not seem to them possi
ble that the people can differ with them.
There is notning more certain, however,
than that civil service reform has come to
stay, and that Gen. Harrison’s administra
tion will not dare to assume au attitude of
hostility to it. The people had become
thoroughly disgusted with the spoils system
when civil service reform was adopted, aud
they are by no means anxious to go back to
that system aud risk tne dangers which it
threatens.
Mr. C eveland is the only President who
has had the courage to make a firm stand
against the spoils seekers. Civil service
reform had been trie 1 during other admin
istrations, and always without su cess.
The spoilsmen always bulldozed the chief
executive into disregarding it. The effort
to bulldoze Mr. Cleveland into disregarding
it failed. Congressmen who had voted for
it were among those who tried to induce
him to defeat it. He has hem true to the
trust reposed in him, and the people will
remember him for this reform, if for
nothing else. Civil'service reform is a
permanent thing, 'and it will tie one of the
safeguards of the country long after Con
gressman Spinola is forgotten.
Here is a pointer for Mr. Blaine: In 1852
Mr. Webster wrote to Presideut Fillmore
as follows; “I have made up my mind to
think no more about the English mission.
My principal reason is that I think that it
would be regarded as a descent. I have been
among the candidates for the first office,
and, not having been nominated for that, I
think it proper to decline any secondary
place. I have been accustomed to give in
structions, and not to receive them.” If
there should be any truth in the rumor that
the Quay crowd is trying to buy off Mr.
Blaine with the English mission, he might
exclaim, with Mr. Webster, that he has
been accustomed to give and not to receive
instructions.
A letter, purporting to have been writ
ten by Chairman Quay to Dr. W. C. Spur
lock, who will apply for the postmaslership
at Fargo, Dak., states that Gov. For.iker
is certain to be offered a cabinet position.
The letter is as follows:
Indianapolis, Dec. 18.
My Old Friend—l leave here to-night for
Waebingtou and aiu in u rush You can, how
ever, pin vour everlasting faith on the appoint
inent for Farg'H as it ih already settled Fora
ker is sure for the Cabinet. M. 8. Quay.
It is now in order for Quay to deny that
he wrote the letter, or for Senator Sher
man to give way to disappointment. Of
course Ohio wsil not furnish two cabinet
officers.
Mr. WauaiuaUer refuses to say anything
with regard to a cabinet position having
been offered him. Is bis refusal to be taken
as evidenoe that be will go Into the cabinet?
If be dii not expect to go into it, wouldn’t
be be very likely tv say sol
THE MORNING NEWS: TUESDAY. DECEMBER 25, 1888.
Checkmating Chandler.
The motion which Senator Gibson, of
Louisiana, made in the Senate the
other day, to amend Senator Chandler’s
resolution providing for investigating the
November elections in the southern states,
so as to include all the states, is heartily ap
proved of by all who are anxious to see
justice done rather than partisan ends
accomplished. The aim of Senator Chand
ler is to create the impression that election
frauds are committed only in the south. He
and other republican leaders have been try
ing to do this for years. Even though they
fail to show that the south is guilty as they
charge, they know that if they are persist
ent in making the charge they will not only
lead the nortneru people to believe that the
southern people are guilty of suppressing
the bullots, but they will divert attention
from the election frauds committed in the
northern states.
Committee after committee of the Se late
has been sent to the South within the last
ten years to find something to sustain the
charges of the republicans that in the south
ern states a free bailot and a fair count are
denied. These committees .thave obtained
testimony which suited them, because it is
not difficult to find witnesses who will swear
to almost anything, but these witnesses, as
a rule, have been shown to be without char
acter and their testimony to be withou
foundation. Nevertheless, they have ac
complished their purpose to a certain ex
tent, because they have produced a wide
spread belief in the north that the colored
vote in the south is suppressed.
In the November elections in the north
voters were bought by the thousands. In
New York, Indiana and other states the
Republican party spent hundreds of thou
sands of dollars, if reports are to be credited,
in purchasing votes. One of the most Uis
tinguished of the republican leaders is now
waiting for the action of tne United States
grand jury at Indianapolis upon the charge
of bribing voters in Indiana. It would not
be difficult to find hundreds of witnesses in
the northern states who would testify that
the Republican party used money freely to
defeat the will of the people.
In view of the fact that there is more tes
timony of corrupt election practices to be
obtained in the north than in the south, it
will hardly lie denied that Senator Gibson’s
motion is an eminently proper one. Sen
ator Chandler, of course, does not want any
investigation of northern election methods,
and his resolution did not pro ide for it,
but if the investigation takes as wide a
range as Senator Gioson proposes, it will
cause more anxiety among northern repub
licans than southern democrats.
Cheating the Gallows.
Public sentiment agaiust the hanging of
women seems to become more pronounced
each year, and it is now quite difficult to
obtain a jury that will render a verdict of
murder against a woman, and more diffi
cult to execute a woman convicted of
murder. The pressure upon the governor
for commutation is such that it is almost
impossible to resist it.
This sentiment was shown very forcibly
in the case of Mrs. Surratt. Senator Wade,
of Ohio, used every effort in his power in
her behalf, but the chief argument upon
which he relied to save her life was con
tained in the question, addressed to Presi
dent Johnson, “Is this government going
to hang a thing in petticoats?”
No one will contend that murder is less
revolting when committed by women, or
that justice cries loss loudly for its punish
ment, but public sentiment seems to have
crystallized into the demand that it be
punished in some way other titan hanging,
and it is not improbable that at some time
different laws for men and women
'"Will be provided. A step in this
direction was made when, at
the time Mrs. Druse was under sentence
of death, a bill was introduced in the New
York legislature to punish women murder
ers by imprisonment for life. The bill was
not passed, and Mrs. Druse paid the death
penalty, but since then no other woman has
been hanged in that state.
It is a question if this sentiment has not
caused an increase of crime among women,
who, without the fear of death to restrain
them, commit deeds that otherwise they
would not. The other day, in a Chicago
court, a woman shot her lawyer because
she became dissatisfied with the way in
which he was conducting her case, and it
looks as if no action would be taken against
her. Would she have done this if she had
believed that she would be hanged for mur
der*
In the case of Mrs. Robinson, whose
crimes were most diabolical, tbe governor
of Massachusetts has yielded to the popular
clamor, but, although the murderess will not
he hanged, her punishment will be but a
degree less severe. Her sentence was com
muted to solitary imprisonment for life.
Her cell will be connected with no other,
and even the window glass will be darkened
to prevent her from seeing anything of the
outside world. The only privilege that will
be accorded her will be that of seeing her
relatives once in two months. Probably
she will wish she had been hanged before she
suffers from this sentence vary long.
The senator from the Twenty-eighth
Georgia district has pursued a course since
he went to Atlanta that is likely to cause
him to be discussed pretty freely by some
of the northern newspapers, and perhaps in
some instances tiie first syllable of tbe verb
should be left off. Senator Gibbs seems to
be a sort of unreconstructed southerner,
aud he talks right out every time a resolu
tion is offered that reminds him of the “re
cent little unpleasantness.” To judge from
some of his utterances, one would think
that he intended to go to New York and
fight the war over with Col. Elliott Shep
ard, but he doesn’t. He is a genial, good
hearted gentleman, and he lives in Morgan
county with a number of northerners who
have prospered there since the war, and
with whom, doubtless, he is on tbe best of
terms.
Woman is coming to the front in almost
every walk of life, and in many instances
she is a business power. "The,latest instance
of her sagacity in business matters is the
election of Mr. Mayer as presideut of the
Baltimore and Ohio railroad. Mr. Mayer la
said to owe his promotion to tbe efforts of
Miss Mary Garrett,' t sistur,of Jobu W. Gar
rett. Ihe policy of .the outgoing president
received the strong opposition of Miss Gar
rett, and she determined to elect anew
man. i’erlia|si, after a while. Miss Uarr.-tt
wilt he e acted president of tbe road. Who
knows? A railroad corporation in England
I as a female president who conducts Its af
fairs satisfactorily.
Will Gen. Harrison distribute any Christ
mas preiwnta among republican statesmen
to-day I Tbe things he has to offer would
be very acceptable presents to a good in* jy
aiuuou* statesmen. 1
CURRENT commknt.
You Moke Us Tired.
From the Philadelphia Brest (Rep.)
The Randall boom for President in 1892 is
already running at large in Georgia. It is
crowding the season a little, but only for the
purpose or ascertaining whether there is any
vitality left in Mr. Cleveland's order against per
nicious activity.
Disposing of Hayes.
From the New York Graphic ( Dem .)
It is said that Gen. Harrison intends to give
Rutherford B- Hayes a diplomatic appointment.
He might send him as minister plenipotentiary
and envoy extraordinary to Cochin-China or
Shanghai. It would give the ex-President a
chance to improve the breed of his live stock.
Why, Indeed 7
From the New York World ( Dem .)
, \) by should Rutherford B. Hayes have been
' ignored by the great Boss Quay on a railway
train in Indiana. The former accepted a presi
dency which other men stole; the latter bought
a presidency for another man to accept. The
Li! ,1C j * s hardly great enough to warrant
taker SK * e n t ma^er snubbing.the presidency
Secure Unity Some Other Way.
From the New York Star (Dem.)
There is no doubt, as Mr. Oates says, that a
foreign war would remove all sectionalism from
our midst. It would unite the country against
the common enemy until there would be no
north, no south, no east, no west. But a war is
watseful in everything that is of value to a na
tion. It would cost us the lives of thousands of
our best citizens and millions of money. It is
too expensive a method of securing unity.
BRIGHT BITS.
No. she sobbed, in the sanctity of her
boudoir—“no, I can never marry a man whose
monogram is printed in green, and who ..rites
with purple Ink. Oh, if he had only asked me
to marry him instead of writing to me, things
would have been so different I“— Harper's
Bazar.
Farmer s Wife — Gentleman hire to-day to
offer you SIO,OOO for that railroad frontage
down in the meadow.
Farmer—Well. Matilda, it won t do fer U3 to
sell until my suit- agin the railroad fer damages
fer spoiling that meadow is settled Philadel
phia Record.
Assistance, Not Annoyance Friend
Heavens, Bagley! How can you write with that
baby’s unintelligible prattle ringing in your
ears?
Bagley—Don’t disturb us, Dobson. I’m writ
ing a dialect story and the baby is turnishiug
the language.— Life.
At the Academy—Mr Broadbrush (a promis
ing panter)—Good morning, Mrs. Budrose;
good morning, Miss Violet. You must excuse
me. ladies, but I have been watching you ad
mire my picture.
Both ladies (suddenly and without thought)—
Oh, Mr. Broadbrush, 1 hope you didn't hear
what we said!— Life.
A Terrible Disappointment. —Mother— Why,
my dear, what's the matter? Something has
happened at Mrs. De Music’s party, I know.
Tell me all about it, my child.
Daughter—Boo-hoo: Mrs. de Music asked me
to play, and—and when I told her I was out of
practice, she said she was “so sorry,” and didn't
ask me again. 800-hoo-hoo ’." -New York
Weekly.
The newest thing in wedding tours is called
the “Secret Honeymoon.” neither bride nor
proom having any idea where they are going.
The idea is not new. For years many young
people have married without having any idea
where they were going, or how they were goiug
to get there when t hey did know. They didn't
have enough money to go to housekeeping. -
Norristown Herald.
Ox the Honeymoon.— Mr. Seabury—Why that
smile, sweetheart':
Mrs. Seabury—l was just thinking of mamma’s
last admonition to he careful of alligators after
we got here.
Mr. Seabury—Nonsense! We haven’t seen
one since we left her. (And the suspicion of an
accent on the “her” maned what would have
been a very pleasant afternoon.)— Time.
Customer (to Chatham street gun and pistol
dealer)—l want to buy a pistol to commit
sui
Dealer—Vot! vot: vot! Mein freund. I know
shust vot you vam. You vant von of ray patent
selluf-cocking hair trigger, sure enuff. self-de
fenders. Dot vas made for me exclusively.
You need never feel alrail mit dot pistol in
your pocket. But be careful dot you don't
shoot yonrselluf.—.Veto York Sun
A s>ad Puzzle.— Grafton (entering his friend’s
apartments)—Good gwacious, Algy. why this
dishabille? Two o'clock in the awftawnoon ami
noewavat on!
Baboony (despairingly —Peace, peace, Cholly:
Tis better to have nothing than to be racked
with the thought that what you have might
have been bettah! I’ve looked ovah these 200
ties, but cawn't decide which best harmonizes
with this December sky.—Texas Siftings.
“What is the secret of your success?” asked
the poet.
“That’s just it,” replied the busy merchant :
“there is no secret about it; I’m the biggest ad
vertiser in the state. There's nothing secret
about my business.” And the poet made a note
of it. But the very next man to whom he spoke
about it happened to be his friend, the burglar,
who scoffed at the idea. “Why,” he raid
"secrecy is the very soul of success in my busi
ness. Never advertise, whatever you do." And
the poor poet went out and bought a three
months’ commutation ticket for the lunatic
asylum —Burdette, in Brooklyn Eagle.
PE3ONAu.
Miss Chamberlain, the American beauty, is
still the center of an admiring circle in l’nglarid.
S ie was one evening last week one of the prim
cipal attractions in the royal box at the Patti
concert at Albert hall, London.
The Princess of Wales’ boudoir in her Lon
don house is an octagon room, lurnished in ;t
light and delicate style. The wills are plain,
except here and there, where plaster casts give
them artistic seierity. They are hung with
haud-painted silk panels. The doors are of
satiuwood and mahogany and cameo panels.
The Rev. Huqii ('ALLAN, M. A., of St. An
drew's Cathedral. Glasgow. Scotland, has just
returned to bis native land from a tricycle tour
through Palestine, Turkey. Bulgaria and Ser
via. He wheeled about 2,700 miles. His tri
cycle created astonishment and dismay in many
places, and in Jerusalem the people becamo
much excited over it.
Count Herbert Bismarck, who is one of the
rising sons of F.uropean statecraft, carries ?
scar received in battle. He was shot through
the thigh in the memorable cavalry charge on
the afternoon of Mars-le-Tour, in which he rode
as a private dragoon. It was in the same charge
that Count Khaden, Mine. Pauline Lucca's first
husband, was wounded.
Already the number of babies who have been
named after Benjamin Harrison is large At
first the President-elect attempted to write a
iiersonal letur to all parents who honored him
by conferring bis name on their offspring. Now
Kiijah tries to perform this duty, but bis whistle
souuds very mournful at times as he looks at
the pile of letters before him, all of which refer
to Baby Benjamin.
Mlle. Dumas is tbe president of an associa
tion of Protestant ladies who visit systematical
ly the semen's prison of St. 1 azare. in Paris
Some idea of Mile. Dumas' devotion in this good
work may be gathered from the circumstance
that when she was 82 years of age (she is now
Mi) she learned S|>anisb. that she might apeak
words of comfort to a young Andalusian who
did not understand French.
Count Deym. tho new Austrian ambassador
to tbe Court of Bt. James, is a man almost |iain
fully tall He was councillor of legation at
London during the ministry of Count Beust.
Ills wife is a VieauUful woman, belonging to a
Prussian family of nobility. Count Deym, in
spite of Ills name, is enormously rich, and will
entertain on a luxurious scale. The count and
countess both speak Kngiisb perfectly, as do
their children.
Says the editor of the London World: “Mrs
Cleveland, in quitting the white bouse, will, I
hear, take with her rather an unpleasant
souvenir of her husband's term of office The
conatant handshaking she has undergone has
permanently’ enlarged tier right hand to such
an extent that ahe la obliged to wear on it a
glove two Sixes larger than tbe one which flu
her left hand " This shows how an uyran voy
age Will beget eaaggera’lon in a rumor When
the aIKMt yarn left these shore* It was 4 glo. .
of Old/ one siza larger which Mrs. Ogeelau 1
worn on her right hand.
(’oust llrunss Bosuns made his maiden
speech in the Reichstag last Friday I'nlik - his
fat her, he drauk no i't.in iy during the thirty
minutes tie waa addressing his ciillesgiv-s Hut
lie resembled Ills sire In bM delivery (lie voice,
eii'ineutiiou, gwei ere* nod abrupt noth' *l w-re
mind) like those • ( tin slier Itiknierek Ills
pr seme Is not as impressive as his father s, hut
that may be iwause i/f his youth Ills -p*-* L
was aide . sal on the whole, wort hy of his eg
abed origin He wae very nervous at fins, hot
as tie went ouFev-ariieealm aid fluent In a very
stern time he will pam* Use cmlHeiee IS him
self of CM stl deleter
kngosUir* Haters nr* lism b**t retired y f.tf
removing ludigvaUou Ask your druggist for
tie genuine, prepared fry Irr J OH Ulegsrt * j
A Fatherly Interest.
From the Merchant Traveler.
“Well, what is it now?” said a father to his
son; “more money, I suppose. How much
do you want this time?"
“1 think about S2O will do, sir.”
"Twenty dollars, Poker, I suppose. How
many times have I told you to avoid gambling
as you would a pestilence! It will be your
moral and financial ruin if you don't atop it.”
“But it doesn't happen to lie poker, father.”
“Horse-racing then; it's all the same. Why,
when I was your age I never made a bet in my
life.”
“It isn't horses, either.”
“A box at the theater, then. Another reck
less piece of extravagance and utterly useless.
I cannot conscientiously, as a church member,
encourage such habits in you. You can't have
the money."
“But, father I wanted it on account of a little
prize flgnc.
“Prize fight, did you say* Prize fight! Where
abouts is it going to be!”
She Didn’t Buy.
From the Few York Star.
Taking a pleasant promenade through the
Metropolitan art musenm yesterday, I became
much interested in a little discussion carried on
between an old couple who were evidently visit
ing the art gallery for the first time. The old
lady was much struck with what she termed
the '‘naturalness” of a group of cows in a pict
ure of Sir Edward Eanaseer. Although it wasn’t
really so, the tail of one of the calves appeared
to be twisted round a tree, and to this the de
lighted lady called the attention of her hus
band.
"Do you think, though, Sammy," she said,
"that it is possible a cow s taii can be hooked
round a tree in that manner?”
"Nothing is impossible to genius," was the
concise answer of Sammy.
“I must buy that picture. Say, mister,” she
cried to an usher, “how much will you take for
that picture?”
"It is not for sale, madam; but if it were, you
would have to pay $15,000 f >r it.”
The old iady collapsed.
No “Britches" in His.
From the Few York World
“Wall,” said Uocle James to the boys in the
store, "I wuz down to see Maria t'other day in
New York, an' her mail, who is a liar thar. tuk
me out to dinner—’a Dutch grub." he called it.
"It was raly good, andl jes' sailed in. Thar
wuz soop, an’ a dish the waiter called a hallway
or entry or somethin', an’ a lot o’ little plates
with stuff on ’em, but mighty good.
“Wall, we waded right in, an’ I began to fill
up. When I had eat about ali I cottld go the
waiter looked at me.
“’Britches feryou. sir,’ he sez.
“Wall, I jest didn’t know what to say, fur I
didn’t like the idea of eatin’ pants, so I jest laid
back and haw-hawed right out, an’ sez: ‘No,
sonny, I an’t eatin’ clothes this trip.’
“Then 1 thought mebbe the cuss was foolin’
me, so I sez: ’But you might fetch me a little
piece of an ulster.'
"The waiter looked sorter riled, arid son in-law
he jest sot thar and tittered, and at last he sez:
‘All right, waiter, bring it along,’ and I swow if
the waiter didn’t fetch a hunk o’ cheese.
“All the way hum my smart Alec : son-in-laiv
would every oacet in a while snort out ‘pants'
an’ then laff, an’ when Maria heerd or it I
thought she’d die a laffln’. It beats me when
they call cheese britches,” and taking a handful
of soda crackers, the old man strolled away.
One of the Madame's Trlcka.
From the Few York S ar.
Now that the dashing but dangerous Diss De
bar emerges from her enforced retirement on
the “island" to day, it is a matter for conjecture
what trickery she will turn to. For, of course,
so restless and adventurous a spirit cannot be
disheartened by a single failure, after all these
years of brilliant rascality.
Some of my acquaintance, well-xnown society
ladies, have a very vivid and painful recollec
tion of the Princess Kditha, as the madarne
called herself.
“Oh, she was the suavest and cunningest
creature,” said a wealthy Fifty-fifth street
dame, at whose luncheons and teas the madarne
had frequently been an invited guest. “Here is
.Mrs. —indicating a young and handsome
woman beside her —“she can tell you a reallv
awful story of that woman. Can’t you, dear*’’
“Shi” said the other. “I don’t mind telling
you if you will only omit my name. It was
several years ago, In Kansas City, that I first
met her. She was then living with ‘the Gen
eral,’ as she called him, and by some means she
managed to insinuate herself into respectable
society. She used to excite wonder by doint
some tricks of legerdemain and memorizing"
One day she told me the spirits had a communi
cation to make to me, and a sitting was ar
ranged. I was 19 years old th n, and, I need
hardly say, a little impressionable. At the sit
ting she received, or pretended to receive, a
snirit letter from my dead uncle, directing me
to go to a certain place in St. Louis on a speci
fied day, where I would meet the man whom
fate designed and my uncle wished to be my
future husband.
“Of course I was upset by such a communi
cation. The letter closed with the solemn in
junction that I was to take nobody into the se
cret. For several days 1 was in a pitiful condi
tion, but at last I mustered up sufficient pluck
to tell one of my friends all about the matter.
Mr. 8.. at whose house I was stopping, was in
formed of it, and he at once made me go all
over the story again. ‘Why, Miss Alice,’ he
said, ‘there is a rascally purp. se in this, my
ieir. You will go to St. Louis and I will ac
company you.’
“Meanwhile he engaged detectives and put
them on the track of Mme. Diss Debar. Two
■lays before the time set for my rendezvous
the detectives reported that they had unearthed
iny ‘affinity.’ He was a dupe of the madame's.
just like young I-awrenco, and was entirely
willing to carry out her scheme and marry me.
the madarne coming in for a very handsome
commission when their victim was securely tied
at the altar.”
"Did you ever see the bridegroom she had
picked out for you?” I inquir and.
"No,” she replied, lauzhing. “And I’m not
likely to, either. The three left Kansas City
suddenly Fate brought me another ’affinity’
shortly afterward, whom 1 married, and I’m
perfectly sure uncle's spirit is appeased, for I
haven't heard from him since.”
Long ’fore He Knew Who Banty Claus
Wuz.
From Pipes o' Pan at Zewhtlmry.
Jos’ a little bit o' feller- I remember still—
L'st to almost cry for Christmas, like a young
ster will.
Fourth o’ July’s nothin’ to it!—New Year's
ain’t a smell; ,
Raster Sunday—circus (lay -jes’ all dead in the
shell!
lordy, though! at night, you know, to set
around and hear
The old folks work the story off about the
sledge and deer,
And “Santy” skootin' round the roof, all
wrapped In fur and fuzz—
long afore
I knowed who
“Santy Claus” wuz 1
Ust to wait, and set up late, a week er two
ahead;
Couldn’t hardly keep awake, ner wouldn't go to
bed;
While stewin'on the Are. and mother settin'
here
Darnin’ socks, and rockin' in the skreeky rockin'
cheer;
l‘ap gap', and wunder where it wuz the money
went,
And quar'l with his frosted heels, and spill his
liniment;
And me a-dreamin' sleigh-bells when the clock
'ud whir and buzz.
Long fore
I knowed who
“Santy Claus” wuz!
Size the fire-place up, and Agger how "Old
Santy” could
Manage to come down the cbimbly, like they
said he would;
Wistit tnat I could hide and see him—wundered
what he’d say
Ef be ketcbed a feller layln' fer him tliataway 1
Hut 1 bet on him, and liked him, same as er be
had
Turned to pat me on the back and say: "Look
here, my lad.
Here's my neck—Jes’ he'p yourae'f, like all good
boys does!"
Lung alore
I knowed who
“Santy Claus" wuz:
Wlslit that yam was true about him, aa 'peered
to be
Truth made out -• lies like that un’s good
enough foi roe
Wisiit 1 still wp- so u iiiAdm' I could jes'go wild
<irer bangin' i p m/ stockin'*. like the little
child
('limbin' In mjr lap tonight, arid beggln' me to
l#* I
llouttf. m rs ii leer* and "uld Haaty ' that ahe
l<p rli e 11,
1 m ball or. y for this little girl-sweetheart of
Ijjuk afore
him knows who
santy Claus" is'
A 1 Lag rant Wrong,
To a<l ve’Les in print >o by word of inouUi,
a debtifidw coHUZUMig ll.gredieiiU <iru
laowl to impair healthy Imth, or ezzielerate
tu* <l** y of lad iaw, is s flagrant wrong.
'TV <ksi purr day Lss healthful *#j. 1
VJVjWjjn only, j
ITS M3 OP INTER SST.
A bullet fired into a Tennessee nepn*o who
was stealing a pig struck him in the right arm,
ran up to the shoulder, passed down to the left
side, twisted around two ribs and dropped at
his feet.
The model of the monument which is to be
erected in Haymarket Square, Chicago, in mem
ory of the policemen who fell in the encounter
with the anarchists, has l>een finished, and will
be sent at once to New York for casting. The
foundation for the monument is now being put
in place in the square. The figure is 8 feet high,
and will stand on a granite pedestal 4 feet in
height. The model was a robust patrolman, of
splendid physique, whose face and figure are
familiar to many Chicagoans. Toe figure
stands with the right hand upraised, as if in
voking the law.
The town of Eaton, 0., is aroused over the
outline of a man's face, which apjiears on the
window glass of a house in which one Christ
man, who was murdered two years ago, lived.
Christman's wife and daughter occupy the
dwelling, and the Cincinnati Enquirer quote *
both as saying that they “have seen the face
since last March, and have avoided making it
known to the public, from the fact that they
did not want to be bothered with the people
coming to aee it." It is stated that others have
seen the face, and that it resembles very closely
that of the murdered man.
A Findlay (O.) sPEciAL*says: Crawfis college,
built by John Crawfis, a farmer, who had a sur
plus of wealth and wanted to build a monument
to himself, is nearly completed. It is situated
in Blanchard township, Putnam county, just
across the line from this county, and cost about
$15,000. When it is finished nobody knows
what it will be used for. Certainly no college
can be maintained that far fiom a town, and
unless Mr. Crawfis endows the Institution with
at least $50,000 there will be no \ jjfibility of
of maintainingeyen a small-sized senool, much
les3 a great seat of learning.
There was an exciting scene on North Grand
avenue. St. Louis, late the other evening, caused
by a horse attached to a roofer's wagon run
ning There was a stove in the vehicle,
and the horse, by making a short turn, scat
tered the live coals about the wagon, setting it
on fire. Flames several feet high leaped from 1
the wagon, but the horse nevertheless contin
ued on its aimless run. After a boy had been
knocked down and run over, an excitable citi
zen thought to shoot the steed, and, whipping
ont a revolver, joined in the chase. He ran
for several squares, but didn’t get within shooi
ng distance until the runaway had been
stopped. He was then so thoroughly exhausted
that he could hardly take aim and shoot the
animal, even if he cared to.
For four years Mrs. Benjamin Moyer of
Souderton, Pa., was totally bliud. Not long ago
she was taken ill, so that she had to stay in bed
several days. On the fourth day she awoke in
the morning and exclaimed: “I see!" Her
husband rushed to the bedside and was recog
nized. Then the other members of the house
hold came in and were recognized. She pointed
out different articles of furniture in the room,
told different persons what they were wearing,
and in many ways proved that she saw. She
asked that all her children and grandchildren,
twenty-five in all, come to her bedside, and they
did. She told them that she had earnestly
prayed that she might see them all once before
she died, and this was the answer to her prayer.
Then she said:. "This is the last day that I shall
ever have the use of my eyesight." She awoke
the next morning as blind as ever, and has been
so ever since.
At a recent auction sale in London the great
Hindoo Lingam god was knocked down to a
jeweler for $13,1)00. This curious relic stood 2(4
inches in bight. It was preserved for more than
1,000 years in an ancient temple at Delhi. The
base is of solid fold, and around it are set nine
gems or charms, a diamond, ruby, sapphire
chrysoberyl cat’s eye. coral, pearl, hyacirithine
garnet, yellow sapphire and emerald. Round
the apex of this gold pyramid is a plinth set
with diamonds. On the apex is a topaz l 10-16
mches in length and 9-16 of an inch in depth,
shaped like a horseshoe; in the center of the
horseshoe the great chrysobervl cat's eye
stands upright. When Bad Shah Eahador
Shah, the last King of Delhi, was captured and
exiled to tne Andaman Isles, his queen secreted
this gem, and it was never seen again until
being distressed during the mutiny, she sold it
to the present owner.
El Paso, Texas, is the distribution point of
some nther wild stories, of which |the follow
ing—the latest—is certainly a good specimen:
During a heavy snow storm in Sierra county.
New Mexico, Capt. Grozier got lost while en
route on horseba.-k from his ranch to Chloride,
a small mining camp. He nad neither a gun
with him to discharge, and thus attract atten
tion and help, nor matches to start a fire All
he had was a pocket knife. When he found that
he was fast getting benumbed he killed hi
iiorse with the knife, took out the entrails and
crawled into the warm carcasi, leadng only
the liver inside. Completely covered up witu
snow- he remained in this retreat for three days,
ijating meanwhile a portion of the horse's
liver. When he was missed a party went out to
hunt for him and was successful in its search
He was taken to Fairview, a mining camp o i
the Cudrillo Negro creek. He is badly frost
bitten.
An old man, who called at the Mayor’s office
in Baltimore, Monday, to learn the law govern
ing the sale of fruits, explained tnat he had
been a fruiter for many years, and during the
war sold apples in front of Independence Hall,
Philadelphia, by special permission of the May
or. With an eye to business he had the legs of
his stand painted red, white and blue, and or
namented the stand with the Union ffag and
several stanzas of bad poetry, referring to the
issues of the times. He wai born on Februarv
13. 1312, and, as his hair is yet black, the .Mayor
remarked that he must have been dying his
hair. The old man said that then- was nothing
artiffcial about him. "hook at this spring,” he
remarked, at the same time malting a number
of gyrations to attest to the activity of
his legs. Afler the exhibition of his condensed
war dance, he showed his ability as a go as-you
please pedestrian. He then quoted some of his
Independence Hall apple (poetry. and after ex
pressing the hope that he would meet the
mayor in heaven, the old fruit vender left.
Says the Pali Mall Gazette : When Mr.
Gladstone reads a book he does so pencil in
hand, marking off on the margin those passages
which he wishes to remember, querying those
about which he Is in doubt, and putting a crocs
opposite those which he disputes. At the end
or the volume he constructs a kind of index of
his own, which enables him to refer to those
things he wishes to rem mber in the book
Darwin records a meeting with Buckle and
“was very glad to learn from him his system of
collecting facts. He told me that he bought all
the books which he reail, and made a full index
to each of the facts which he thought might
prove serviceable to him, and that he could
always remember in wbat book he had read
anything, for Id* memory was wonderful. 1
asked him how at llrst he could judge what
facta would lie serviceable, and he answered
that he did not know, but that a sort of instinct
guided him. From this habit of making indices
he was enabled to give the astonishing number
of refi-rences on all sorts of subjects which may
lie found in his History of Civilization.' ” Dar
win's own method, as described by his son was
not very dissimilar. “In each book, as he read
a. he marked passages bearing on his work In
reading a book or pamphlet he male pencil
lines at the side of the page, often adding short
remarks, ami at the eml made a list of the pages
marked. When it was to be catalogued ami
put away, the markeil pages were looked at,
and so a rough abstract of the book was made,”
A pi-.oiiLKM that at a glance seems easy
enough to tempt many a schoolboy to spend a
portion of his Christinas vacation in an en
deavor to solve it, appeared recently in a
Maine journal, and is as follows: "Take the
numlier tlfteen. Multiply it by itself aud you
have22s. Now multiply by itself. Then
multiply that product by itself, and so on until
Alteon products have been multiplied tiy them
selves in turn." The question aroused con
siderable interest among lawyers in Portland,
ami their beet inattuupatlcian, after struggling
with the problem long enough to see how much
labor was eutaded in the solution, made the
following discount Jug re|x>rt upon it:
'I he Anal product called for contains
dh.Mtl figures It lie A rst of which are
1.112.) Allowing throe figures to nu Inch, the
answer would be over 1.070 feet long. To per
forin tlie operation would require about
■701,1*10,001 figures. If they can Ist mude at the '
rau* of 100 a minute, a |jer*ou working ten
noiirii a <lgy for days In **uoh ytittr would Imj
if* ymrn a:*out a. If, in iimltipi/itjg. he should
make a rw of ciphers, aa he do**n in other
figures, thf number of flgurv* um# | would lie
mor* than ftVl.W.tf.m That would tie the pro
cia*i iiumlaT of figures unod If the product of the
n*ft hand figure In each luui; ipl.cn ml by each
figure of in* fiiuliiph **r aae oiway* a single
fyi.re: but. an It is must fnju till}, and yet uot
alwavs, two figured, the metnod **fn|*loyed to
o’ fain Hie foregoing result cannot bn
applied. Afftorinijg that the cipher h u**d on
an average am** in tan tilm*e. 47:i,tfJ(l.uilU flgnr. •
je a ems* appro*imamm ut Um* actual ouiu
# i km** bus MMtosaip troubled wftli
Ocmgfca, n* iu mak tmm liars used *?*
Trai'fcrs, wUktU bars never failed,
aSMt I must say Umf ate second %4> ***** In Ute
world M —fUim A. H**. Cm*hUrr t §l, taui.
mum
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