Newspaper Page Text
FART TWO.
Lasts but a very short time. We are not in the habit of writing sensational ads.; our Advertisements
have stood the criticism of the buying public for years. They appreciate the fact that when we
promise to do a thing we always do it. cost what it may. When we offer an article at a certain
• *
BOYS’ SUITS.
Sizes 4 to 14 years.
The Most Stupendous Sale on Record.
Mothers and Fathers who are wise will take heed
of the following prices:
SI.OO. $1.25, $1.50. $2.00, $2.50, $3.00,
$3.50. $4.00, $4.50, $5,00, $6.00,
$7.50. AND SB.OO.
Save money, time, trouble and annoyance by
coming direct to us. You will find an enormous
and elegant line of these fine Suits, in Cassimeres,
black and blue Cheviots, English Clay Worsteds, Blue
Flannel, Homespun, Serges, Scotch Cheviots, suitable
for Spring. Easter is not far off and boys should see
us about this during the coming week. We are not
blowing when we assert that we have the largest
stock of the finest goods at the lowest prices ever
shown in Savannah. It is the plain, honest fact.
Words can’t describe the beauties, varieties, qualities,
styles and cheapness of these suits for boys. Parents,
particular attention is called to the above prices, and
they are 35 per cent, less than equal values can be
bought for elsewhere.
SEE WINDOW
DISPLAY
AND PRICES.
CLERKS FOR UNCLE SAM.
TWENTY -THREE THOUSAND IN
WASHINGTON ALONE.
There Are Quantities of Lovely Girls
und Battalions of Gallant Swains, but
They Must Not Marry One Another
on Pain of Dismissal.
From the New York Advertiser.
Washington, March 18.—The recent at
tempt by the House of Representatives, de
feated in the Senate, to lengthen the work
ing hours and out down the vacations of
employes in the departments, was inspired
by a sentiment which is widespread in the
west. AH over that part of the oountry the
farmers, while deriding the army and navy,
most especially objurgate the government
clerks at Washington. They imag
ine that those servants of Uncle
Sam are so many luxurious idlers
fattening at the public trough. It was they
who struck this blow at them in Congress.
Very likely the attempt will be repeated.
The best thing for the officeholders to do Is
to form a union for defensive purposes.
There are 23,000 of them here, and their
combined influence would sutßce to defeat
any bill which might affect their interests
Injuriously.
An act of congress making such a change
as was proposed would beau absurdity, be
cause auy secretary oan, by a simple order,
increase the working hours of the clerks in
his department to any extent which he
thinks desirable. He is an autocrat, even
controlling matrimony among his subordi
nates. No two employes of the treasury
ran become husband and wife, both re
taining their places. Asa penalty for
mating, the woman must resign or be dis
charged, because it is held that one family
ought not to draw two inoomes from the
government. John Sherman iirst made
this rule. One day he summoned a pretty
clerk and said to her:
“You are employed iuthe treasury, while
your brother Is in the war department. It
is not right that two members of a family
should draw pay from Uncle Sam. Whioh
of you will resign i"
The girl looked grave for a moment. Then
glanolng up with a sporkllDg eye, she re
plied :
“Mr. Secretary, you are employed in the
treasury, while your brother is iu the war
department ae general of the army. Which
you is going to resign?"
Mr. Sherman did not answer the question,
but he seemed greatly amused. The pretty
clerk is still in the employ of the treasury.
Her brother was not interfered with.
Propinquity is said to be uature’s chief
matrimonial agent. Nevertheless, on ac
count of the regulation quoted, marriages
between government clerks very rarely
uccur. In many instanoos they have been
*ept secret, sometimes for years. To be
found out moans immediate disoharge for
tno woman who has committed the offense
of signing another thau her lawful name to
the pay vouchers. However, the secretary
is not restrained by the oivil service law
from dismissing without cause any em
ploye. The rule mentioned is not applied
*n all the departments. Secretary Tracy
mu not approve of it, and several weddings
•ook place under his regime.
Gf the lax ways of the “good old times"
The morning News.
A SESATION
COLLATS'
not a few odd stories are told. Chief Clerk
Hogg of the navy department relates an
anecdote of a bureau now extinct, whioh
was conducted by a gallant naval offloer.
One day, about 2 o’clock p. m., the latter
stepped into the room of his assistant and
said:
“Billy, here's a draft of a very Important
letter that I am extremely anzlous to dis
patch by the afternoon mail. Please make
ine a clean copy of it as quickly as you can.”
It beiDg so lata In the afternoon, “Billy”
was resting. Hu looked up sleepily and re
plied:
“Why, oommodore, I have already writ
ten two letters to-day!"
“Well, then, Billy,” said the oommodore,
“never mind. To-morrow will do as well."
Clerkships in the department of state are
considered the most desirable. To begin
with, the incumbents are never discharged
without being provided with a consul
ship or some other place. Their em
inent oarries a certain amount of social po
sition with it. The most oonspicnous of the
young swells in Washington are employes
of the “foreign office," as they like to call
i!. Beaux being greatly in demand bore,
they have more invitations than they can ao
oept. With small salaries and no prospeots,
they would be regarded as "detrimentals”
in other cities, but here they are at the top of
the swim. Good manners and the faot of
wearing pantaloons constitute satisfactory
olaims to recognition in local society. They
gee their dinners at other people's bouses,
see all the plays that are going without pay
ing a cent. and enjoy excellent opportuni
ties for marrying the rich girls who fairly
swarm at the copital. They are not even
expected to send a bouquet in acknowledg
ment of the entertainment they receive.
The work of a olerk In the department of
state implies no little responsibility. A
wrong word in his transoript of a diplo
matic paper might place this government In
a false position. The business he transaote
is mostly of a secret nature. He may know
long in advance whom the President has
ohesen for a cabinet office, or what war
ships ere about to be sent to threaten the
cities of a foreign nation. If he tells any
body, and his information gets out, bis in
ilesoretlon may have upset a policy and dis
arranged a complete series of motives whioh
Uncle Bam is trying to oarry out Hap
pily . betrayals of secrets by government
clerks hove been very rare.
Though one-half of the applicants for
places in the departments are women, only
one person of the gentler sex is appointed
for every seven men. There i§ a prejudice
against female clerks on several aooounts.
Nevertheless, some offloials have discovered
that they oan often get a woman for 900 a
year who is more capable than a f 1,200 man.
Before the war the employment of women
as clerks by the government was almost un
known, though they sometimes got oopying
to do at home. The first woman regularly
employed was pul on the rolls of the navy
department thtriy-flve years ago. She was
a young widow. Tt was a grave question
what should be done with her, and it was
thought best to isolate her, as if she were
contagious. An atlio room was given her,
and she received and returned her oopy
ing by a messenger. To-day there
are 1,000 women in the treasury de
partmeol aloneu They and other# In differ
ent departments are effloient as account
ants, correspondents, linguists, draughts
men, typewriters, etc.
In 1881 the ooined monoy belonging to
the government geve out and congress au
MEN’S FINE SUITS.
We have iu our Fine Clothing Department 2,500
Suits, made to sell at sls-00. We place them before
you to open the Spring season with one of the greatest
sales on record. The assortment surpasses in extent
and variety anything of the kind heretofore shown in
this city. While these suits are perfection in fit and
quality, they have the additional merit of being
reasonable in price.
They are beautiful to look at; thdy are well
made; they are cheap in price only.
\
They come in all the latest styles, single and
double breasted Sacks. The fabrics are the newest
and the most fashionable known to the trade. They
are tailor made, and Coats are silk lined and Pants
satin lined.
We expect this sale to be the largest on record
by giving the Greatest Bargains in the history of our
establishment.
Don’t fail to see our $15.00 Black English Clay
Worsted Suits, in Sack, round and straight cut 3 and
4-Button Cutaways. They never sold for less than
S2O-00 the world over.
thorised the issue of legal tender notes pay
able In gold. These were the original
“greenbacks.” They came in sheet* from
the banknote oompanies with blank spaoes
for the signatures of the treasurer and reg
ister. It was necessary to ont them apart
with solssors and trim the edges, no machine
having as yet been invented for that pur
pose. Gen. Spinner suggested that womeu
be employed temporarily to out and count
the notes. A number of them were hired,
and after they had cut 100,000,000 worth of
paper congress authorized another issue, at
the same time making the employment of
the women permanent. Borne of these very
women are still at work in the treasury,
where their sex is intrusted up to the pres
ent time with the counting of the mooey.
From this starting point women gradually
made their way into the other departments.
A great many young men secure places in
the departments merely for the purpose of
supporting themselves while they are study
ing in the great sohoois of law and medicine
here. Matters are so arranged at these in
stitutions that a olerk who stops work at 4
o’oiock p. m. oan get dinner and be on
hand for the evening leotures, whioh begin
at 8 o'clock. After being graduated, the
young physician may practica and yet stay
In oflloe, brooming what is known as a
“sundown doctor.” The medioal schools of
the Georgetown College and Columbia Uni
versity are of the highest rank. In the
Army Medical Museum the fluest medical
library in the world is accessible. Justices
of tbe United Htates supreme court and
great medical officers of the government
are members of the faculties of these and
other learned establishments in Wash
ington.
The House voted to reduce the annual
vacation of the clerks from thirty days to
fifteen days. Undoubtedly many of the
government employes do abuse the present
privilege, whioh allows them thirty days
slok leave in eaoh year in addition to the
regular month of absence. It is reckoned
that one out of every six of them always
gets in as many as thirty days’ illness per
annum. Persons of this class always have
their holidays figured out for a year in ad
vance. By having things thus scheduled
they are able to turn their leisure to the
greatest advantage. For example, whenever
there is a legal holiday there is usually a
half-bolide von the day previons. Tbe olerk
takea the working part of that half-holiday
off. This gives him two days cloar. But
on the day liefora the half-holiday he goes
to the chief of his bureau and asks permis
sion to leave at 2:80 o'elook p. rn., so as to
catoh a train. Thus the single day's holi
day is ek nanded Into days. The in
genuity with whioh suoh affairs are man
aged is said to be wonderful. Legal holi
day* are not subtracted from tbe thirty
days’ leave. Likewise no aooount is taken
of the holidays that are granted when ex-
Beoretaries die. There were five holidays of
this latter sort in December. However, it
should be explained that two-thirds of the
department employes rarely tike a day of
the sick leave allowed them.
If a olerk is absent over sixty days in any
year, he or she mast pay a substitute. The
civil service commission provides all the
substitutes that are wanted. It is provided
that tbe clerks shall give to the substitute a
certain proportion of the pay, usually
amounting to about 56 per cent. By thus
hiring a substitute a clerk might retain his
plaoe in the service of the government for
ten years, though himself blind, paralyzed
and confined to hie bed. In all cases of
SAVANNAH, GA., SUNDAY, MARCH 26, 1893.
price we have it, and lots of them, too. Ours is a BARGAIN STORE every day in the year. OUR
NEW LINE OF SPRING GOODS ARE ALL IN. EVERY DEPARTMENT IS CHOCK FULL OF GOOD,
HONEST GOODS. AT HONEST PRICES and WE DEFY COMPETITION.
sickness a physician’s certificate Is required.
Not long ago the treasury department made
a rule to the effect that suoh certificates
mutt always state the nature of the oom
plalnt. But the looal medical society re
solved in formal council that suoh a thing
wag out of the question, and so the regula
tion fell to the ground.
The olerks are perpetually haunted by a
dread lest they are watched by detectives of
the secret service. That tort of thing is
Boruetimes done, but only rarely and on re
quest of a superior officer, who suspeots
that something is wrong. If a man who
occupies a responsible position gets to
driukmg and “playing tberaoes” it may be
thought worth while to have him shadowed
for a time, with a view to finding out what
his habit* are. If a governmaut employe
is dissipated his boarding-housekeeper,
washerwoman and tradesmen are apt to
suffer, and they do not hesitate to address
complaints to tbe department. If such ap
peals come in so frequently as to be annoy
ing an investigation follows. Oddly enough,
tbe clerk who misbehaves iu such ways Is
usually not a now man, but an old man
who feels sure of his plaoe.
If a money oounter in tbe treasury takes
a gloss of beer in a saloon he imagines that
tbe man who picks his teeth on tbe other
side of the screen in the doorway is larking
there to watch tho motion of his elbow. If
tho young lady who helps hash tbe wornout
bills in the redemption division indulges in
a flirtation at an evening party it is with a
faint though lingering auxlety lest the cock
eyed violin player may possibly be observ
ing her at so muob an hour, drawn on
vouchers from the secret service fund. If
the youth who does up silver in bags of
sl,oijO each invest* $L> in poker chins he can
not help suspeoting that the newly intro
duced acquaintance on the opposite side of
the table, who keeps straddling the unto
so provoklngly, is an oflioer in disguise de
tailed to shadow him.
HANDWRITING BY TELEGRAPH.
An Experiment With the Telauto
graph Successfully Made.
From the Baltimore American.
Chicago, Maroh 21.—A number of news
paper men and invited guests witnessed au
exhibition of Prof. Elisha Gray’s telauto
graph in the Home lusuraneo building this
afternoon. The telautograph, as its name
Implies, enables one to transmit instantane
ously by wire a fao simile of his handwrit
ing to a distance. Au ordinary pen or pen
cil is employed. As it moves a pen at the
other end of the line moves simultaneously,
and forms tbe words and letters In precisely
the same way. Whatever is written at oue
end of the Une is reproduced In fac-simiie
at the other end. The tests this after
noon were entirely satisfactory, raanv of
them being made by tbe guests. Writing,
sketches, musical notation and stenographic
characters were transmitted with equal
fidelity. The testa were made through
artificial resistances representing hundreds
of miles of wires. It is said that the telau
tograph will be generally used as au ad
junct to the telephone, and for business
purpose* generally where private wires are
employed.
“Brown’s Bronchial Troches” are widely
kuowD as an admirable remedy for Bronchitis,
Hoarseness, Coughs, and Throat Troubles.
Sold only in boxee.—ad.
HATS.
/
We Still Hold the Fort, and ALPINES are all
the rage for Spring wear.
WE HAVE THEM IN 20 STYLES.
sll9 buys a Fine Brown or Black Alpine, Satin
lined. Silk Band and Binding.
$1.39 buys a Fine Black or Browu Alpine, Satin
lined, Silk Band and Binding.
$2.00 buys a Fine Fur Alpine, in Cedar, Black,
Brown, Pearl and Gray. Silk Band and Binding.
$2.10 buys a Fine Fur Alpine, in Gray, Black
and Brown. Silk Band and Binding.
$2-50 Buys a Fine Fur Alpine, in Black, Side
Nutria, Cedar, Blue Rock, etc. Silk Band and Bind
ing.
STRAW HATS.
They will be opened to-morrow. One of the
largest and finest lines you ever saw to select from.
Prices from 25c. to $3-00.
149 Broughton Sts
PAT CONAN ALL ALIV®.
He Declares Hia Displeasure With AU
He Beholds in tho Capital.
brum the New York Sun.
Washington, March 17.—1 have seen the
whole jamboree of dumping one administration
out and Jumping another in, except the grand
scalp dance known as an Inaugural ball, and the
spectacle has not increased my American pride
or self-respect.
Four years ago I saw the vast hordes ot drun
ken nioboerats along Pennsylvania avenue
howling themselves into grip and pneumonia
for Harrison, while nobody said Cleveland once.
This year I have seen the same storm bedrab
bled mob bawling itself to hoarseness for Cleve
land. while not one wretobed yeller whispered
Harrison’s name.
Four years ago the same gin mills, dives and
hasheries were flamboyant with the same cheap
and tawdry water-streaked bunting: but it was
the same physiognomical caricatures of Ben
and IjOvi that leered and smirxed from amid a
tangle of big bats aud log cabins on every bn I
cony and banner then, instead of the pictorial
atrocities of Grover and Adial that griu in
ghoulish glee now.
Then tho million mouthed watchword of the
whole hurrahing iierd was “Baby McKee ” Now
it is “Baby Ruth."
What did the great inass of the leather-lunged
yellers kuow or care about the principles Iu
volved in the struggle whioh led to whole
sale swapping of governmental figureheads?
Not one Infinitesimal iota more than the street
car mules whose ears waved disconsolately at
half mast in the dismal tempest that always ac
companies inauguration day.
Tbe change of administration has already
given fresh aud mighty impetus to the he and
she slop-gushers and taffy daubers who nun
querade as journalists and press correspond
ents ot Washington, ai.d the paper's ail o-.er the
oountry are Hooded with their indiscriminate
and nauseating puffery of all sons and coudl
tlons of main aud female official cattle at tne
national capital. Their literary monstrosities
are wrought out with Manila whitewash brushes
dripping with commingled sorghum molasses
and gaudy-colored paint. Their style is a bad
cross betweeu a confectionery shop and a
scavenger cart, with a sick aurora borealis and
a paroxysm ot hystencs thrown in.
There are masculine gr.nders- out of Journal -
istic toadyism and Hunkeyism in Washington
whose fulsome effusions are enough to give any
well-regulated citizen an attack of green and
rollow seasickness at sight. The scent of free
lunch, champagne and vulgar hutnbuggary
elings to all their work. The trail of the ser
pent of servile fawning and bamboozlement is
over it all But the worst of them Uan Ad
disonian model of newspaperial dignity and
propriety compared with most of their feminiue
oolahorers in the bogus panegyric, fraudulent
greatness, and counterfeit grace arid beauty
trade.
In the scribbling bands of these annihilators
of truth, decency, common sense, ami all the
possibilities, every gold plated boor and rap
scallion who has bought Himself a stye in the
Sseußte; every pothouse shyster, slum divo
keeper, and crossroads blatherskite who has
been sentenced to two years In the liou-e, and
every political dirty worker, ward heeler and
scrap beggar who ha - had an oifics of any kind
or degree let down iu reach ot bis unclean
clutches, became at once a gum' of statecraft
and patriotism. Colossus of ability, grace and
virtue, and a thousand tlamtieau-power calcium
light and NJ ton Kobinoor of dazzling brilliancy
—too majestic too glorious, too replendent for
mortal contemplation without a step ladder aud
smoked glass spectacles. Any one of them
would split the molds In which were cast Alex
ander, C’a-sar. Demosthenes, Cicero and Cato.
Washington. Jefferson, Webster, Clay aud Ig
natius Donnelly all comhinei in oue. and leave
over enough of mightiness snd illustrlousneza
to make a score or two of Gladstones, uls
tnarcks. Garibaldis, and Ananiases
Every frowsy and uncouth Mrs. Secretary
Narerheardot, Mrs. Senator Ueehoggius, Mrs.
Representative Flapdoodle, Mrs. Judge Nin
SHOES.
75c. buys a pair Genuine Dongola, Oxford Ties,
Hand Sewed, worth sl-00.
$l5O buys a pair of tine soft, Dongolas, Oxford
Ties, all styles and widths.
Full line of Ladies’, Misses’, Children’s, Infants*
Oxford Ties, in Black, Red, Tan, Brown and White.
Look in our window at a cut shoe, it will show
you what our celebrated School Shoes contains.
8 to 11 at SI.OO. lli to 12 at $1.25.
$3.00 buys a a pair of Collat’s Celebrated Calf
Shoos, all styles, warranted equal to band sewed.
Gentlemon wearing narrow width Shoes can be
fitted iu our establishment at reasonable figures.
Soft and Comfortable Shoes for tender feet
Come in and ask for them.
compoop, Mrs. Gen. Uampfollower and Mrs.
Superintendent of Cuspidors Fits-Lickspittle
blazes forth as a peerless paragon of tran
scendent beauty and accomplishments. Her
costumes, Iu all probability made by some
backwoods dress earp-liter, with the taste of a
saw mill hand, are mors gorgeous than imi>s--
rial robes, and tbe dazxle of her jewels—rhino
(tones and paste—smitss all beholders with
paralysis of the ayes and upbraval of the dia
phragm. Hhe never speaks less thau a
dozeu languages, any of them more flu
ently and correctly than she doss her
own; and the riob, mellifluous accent of
the wasbtub and the cook store, which lingers
on her tongue, has a J’arisian witchery all its
own. Her bearlug is regal and her smiles win
ning enough to pull up the paving stouss on the
side streets. Her painting would turn Raphael
green-eyed with Impotent envy, and at her sing
ing all tbe skylarks of heaven hush twittering
and take to the woods. (Compared with her
Juno, Hebe and the Venus de Medial, ths Queen
of Hhaba, Cleopatra, tbe Mother of the Gracchi,
Elizabeth, Mara of Argyle, De Stool and Dolly
Madia m would have nothing left to do but to
pull tbelr blue ebeuk aprons up over their heads
aud hire themselves out for scrub women to a
charity hospital, or dairymaids to a flock of
billy goats.
And every silly, simpering, giggling, tow
headed, white-eyebrowed, and freckled faced,
lanky, slab sided, gangling, gawky daughter of
a pro temiiore grandee, a two for four year big
panjandrum. blooms out as tbe rare and radiant
incarnation of all terrestrial and oeleslial loveli
ness, a queen of the fairies, a sister of the
angels, with the saraphio strawberry mark on
her matoiilea* left arm. Her tallowy complex
ion Is fair as tbe petal of an apple blossom, or
the Inner lining ot a deep sea shell. Her hair Is
the spun floss of everlasting sunshine. Heaven's
own entrancing blue is in her soulful eyes. Her
ungainly figure-looking, perhaps, like a her
ring box on two tobaccu sticks -is the exqui* to
perfection of a sculptor’s dlvluesl dream. Her
manners blend ths dignity of a duchess with
the freedom and affability of a barmaid; aud
her ennvorst tlon Is a marvelous and enchanting
mingling of the profundity of a Dutch unlver
slty with the wit of the whole Elizabethan axe,
tbe poetry of Burns, Byron, Moore, snd “the
sweet singer of Michigan," all melted Into one
golden nhalllce of liquid melody, and the tender
sentiment of earth and heaven meeting in a
rapt, divine, ecstasying embrace.
Bah! All this, and columns on columns more
of such Irredeemable idlooy and trash, such in
efTabls slush snd rot, day after day. the whole
winter long, the whole year round, the whole
auadrennial through, about a few hundred nr
inary American politicians, and their wives
and daughters—some of them really good look
ing, clever and charming people; but Dy far the
srenter5 renter part of them commonplace to the last
agree in appearance. In manners. In attain
ments, and tu achievements, and note few of
them downright ignoramuses and blaskguards.
There are criminals, and men under abases. In
the Benate; there arc barkeepers and hoodlooina
and freaks In tbe House; tbe bench holds judges
who should be playing onecker* with their noses
on the gratings of a cell and sscratarles even
when sjielled with a big 8 arc only clerks.
As for hackneyed phrase, “beautiful and ac
complished, as used by these capitohne dab
biers m ink and vulgar taffy, it means lose than
nothing “Accomplished" women are not ae
-Ciron as houest and independent public meu;
but It is doubtful whether. In all the world’s
1,000.1100,000 people to day, 100 women could
be found whom any competent JujJge would
pronounce “beautiful." I have seen nearly
every famous womau of mr day, and I have
never seen more than a dozen who were beauti
ful. There are many—thank God! very many—
who are exceedingly pretty, gloriously hand
some, bewltehlngly lovely aud enchanting
women, but lew in any age of the world who
rise to tbe sublime standard of beautiful it is
the highest word In our language, descriptive of
personal loveliness It Is the ne-plus-ultra of
pulchritude. All earth and heaven together
oan boast nothing that Is more than beautiful.
It Is rank blasphemy to apply such a term to
every woman whose husband or father happens,
by the ’’blind nigger luck" of our dirty politics.
PAGES 9 TO 16.
SEE WINDOW
DISPLAY
AND PRICES.
to be dumped or hoisted into a petty office *t
| Washington.
Judging by a good many of tbe pictures sent
out through the illustrated pres# association*
by some of these corresnoudentlal gusbsrs and
oversloppers during the administration Just de
funct a half dozen of the average alleged “bellaa
and beauties" of the capital would have scared
all ths coyotes out ot the Bad Lands. During
the Bioux outbreak two winters ago I sug
gested to tbe war department that I might sum
marily end all Die troubles by sending a bevy
of these wood-cutty darlings out to the Fine
Ridge and Wounded Knee region. I main
tained that the wildest savage (net ever worn
war paint and a breechc-lout would break hid
ueok a dozen times getting away from lueb an
api ailing phalanx oflapparitlons.
We soon had an opportunity to test my plan.
I was then living on Devil’s lake, a realm of
which tbe only respectable feature is tbe name.
One Hunday morning In January, 18 91. the pa
pers were filled With panicky dlspatohes about)
the Turtle mountain Indians, my most civilized
and agreeable neighbors, taking the war-path.
Tuey were reported burning, ravaging and mas
sacrelng all over tbs frigid dassrts that pass for
wheat farms about Bottineau, northeast of my
place. Battlers wore said to he flying for tbelr
lives. Frantlo epiwal* were Issued for troops,
arms and ammunition. The governor of tha
state kept the telegraph wires ablaze ordering
out the militia, and sent hia heroic staff officers
cavorting like redheaded Bobsdils here and
there and erery where -axoept where thevoould
be of use. The National Guard warriors of
Fargo, Grand Forks, Jlmtown, Bismarck, Hell
vllle and other olassio settlements ware under
arms day and night, and visions of sealpa and
carnage (filed everybody's dreams.
in tbs Dick of time 1 received a big batch of
pa|iers. Washington’s Ink geysers of gush and
slush were out in force One paper contained a
two oolumnr bapsody ou "the peerless beauties
of tbe season,” and a lot of stereotype portrait*
of the seml-divtne young creatures, who were
described in terms that split all puffery’*
brazen trumpets into hairpins, as queening It
In capitohne society Monday night I hung tho
naper with the “Beauty Plotures.’’ on a tama
rack tree on the Indian trail not far from my
cabin. Tuesday morning, our scouts, headed
by Death Doaling MaJ. Makee and Capt. Yorkey
reported that there was not an Indian, not a
savage with a red hide left in all tho neighbor
hood. They had folded their ghost shirts, liko
sheladdllng Arabs, and fled in wild dismay.
Within twenty four hours they were clear over
the Manitoba line and still a-runnlng The
Turtle Mountain Indian war was over. Beauty-*
suoh beauty—ls a power!
Seriously. Is it not time, in the name of
American decency—if there is any such thing—
local) a halt In newsitaperial flunke.vlsm and
abject jenkmsisni? For four years a disgusted
world lias been deluged with adulation of tha
Harrisons and Baby McKee, the Millers, Noble*,
Wauoiiiakers, Elkinses, ct id ornne crowdum.
Who knows or cares where or how they are
to-day?
Tbe same slush engines are being turned
loose on tha Cleveland* and Baby Ruth, tho
Stevenson*, Hoke Smiths, Bissells aud la
ments. For graolous sake, oail off the taffy
squirts and give us s rest. I am tough in en
durance, but tbe limit is well-nigh reached.
Yours appealingly.
Fx-Ssoiietarv Rusk said to a Washington re
porter; "Yes, I shall go back on my farm In
Western Wisconsin and resume just where I
left off four years ago. I follow farming not
for sentiment or pastime, but to make tt pay.
and so I shall start to raising bay and grtss and
breeding swine and oattle a* of old. But i shall
always look back with intense satisfaction to
my four years of official life, for, on the wnole,
the time has been spent pleasantly and profit
ably."
Zola is very careless as to the fate of his man
uscripts. He sends his novel* chapter by chap
ter to tbs printer without taking the trouble to
reread what he has hastily written, and the re
sult is that tbe task of revision is almost end'
leas.