Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page.

« 4 THE ATLANTA SEMI-WEEKLY JOURNAL, ATLANTA, GA., FRIDAY, MAY 16, 1913. THE SEMI-WEEEY JOURNAL 4 ATLANTA, GA., 5 NORTH FORSYTH ST. Entered at the Atlanta Postoffice as Mail Matter of the Second Class. JAMES R. GRAY, President and Editor. SUBSCRIPTION PRICE Twelve months •-•••._ 75o Six months 40a Three months 26o The Semi-Weekly Journal is published on Tuesday and Friday, and is mailed by the shortest routes for early delivery. It contains news from all over the world, brought by special leased wires into our office. It has a staff of distinguished contributors, with strong: department! of special value to the home and the farm. Agents warted ct every postoffice. Liberal' com mission allowed. Outfit free. Write R. R- BRAD LEY, Circulation Manager. The only traveling representatives we have ars J. A. Bryan, R. F. Bolton, C. C. Coyle, L. H. Kim brough and C. T. Yates. We will be responsible only for money paid to the above named traveling repre sentatives. NOTICE TO SUBSCRIBERS. The label used for addressing your paper shows the time your subscription expires. By renewing at least two weeks before the date on this label, you insure regular service. In ordering paper changed, be sure to mention your old, as well as your new address. If on a route please give the route number. We cannot enter subscriptions to begin with back numbers. Remittances should be sent by postal order or registered mail. Address all orders and notices for this de partment to THE SEMI-WEEKLY JOURNAL, Atlanta, Ga_ •A Cheering Crop Outlook. .. As viewed in the May report for food crops the country ovei—is distinctly cheering. The wheat har vest promises to be even more abundant than it was last year. TJhe outlook for a great corn yield is also assuring and in so far as present conditions permit a prophecy a plenteous summer and autumnal for all food products may be expected. The year 1912 established a new record for staple crops in the United States and we still feel the im petus of prosperity which they gave. There were sections of /the South and of Georgia, however, where untoward weather conditions resulted unfor tunately; and, though times were exceptionally good in ue country at lr— these particular districts felt the pinch of circumstance- There is reason to hope that, such will not he the case this year. Certain it is, according to trust worthy reports, that the agricultural outlook is more encouraging in Georgia today than it was a twelve- month ago. The State College of Agriculture is advised by its farm demonstration agents that wheat and corn crops are very promising in most of the counties and that'extraordinary interest is manifesteu in t"he cul tivation of food products and the application of ad vanced agricultural methods. Of particular note is the growth and enthusiasm of the Boys’ Corn clubs. These productive institutions have been organized in a majority of the counties and their influence upon farming in genera] is widely felt. Perhaps the most significant fact of the year, ag riculturally speaking, is the reduction of Georgia’s cotton acreage and the devotion of more soil and en ergy to food supplies. The Franco-Spanish Alliance. King Alfonso’s visit' to Paris is being used as a peg on which to hang all manner of gossip concerning a Franco-Spanish alliance. The young monarch, we are told, has been in conference with President Poincare; farreaching designs are afoot whereby France, actively supported by her Iberian neighbor, will play a bolder hand in European affairs and whereby Spain, in return, will receive assistance in bettering her finances and in developing her natural resources. Spain’s military strength counts for comparative ly little, if considered within itself alone, but as an adjunct to that of France it woula become important. In commenting on this aspect of the rumored alli ance, the Washington Post points out that “Spain s not confronted by menacing neighbors, like her new ally; and in the event of trouble, her contribution to the mutual activities would be employed within French territory. No concealment of that feature of the arrangement is attempted, the French press favorably commenting on the prospect that two hun dred thousand fine soldiers would thus Income avail- . able for the defense of the country.” Never within recent years has the equilibrium of the Triple Alliance and the Triple Entente been so unsteady as withl the past few 'seasons. Germany and Austria are suspiciously watching every shadow of France and England and Russia. Especially marked just now is the distruct between Germany and France. The mere hint of a Franco-Spanish alliance is, thereore, enough to set Europe tiptoe with expectancy. Let the Courts Decide. Japan’s present attitude toward the California anti-alien land bill appeans to be one of prudence and restraint. Its ambassador a*t Washington, dispatches say, will make no further protest until Governor Johnson acts upon the measure; if he signs it, as is likely, Japan will not then proceed on its own ac count to test the constitutionality of the law, but “will wait a reasonable length of time to see what the federal administration intends to do,” and will look to our own government to determine through an appeal to the courts whether or not the California bill involves a treaty violation. That seems to be the most satisfactory course this vexed issue could take, unless California herself, yielding to a sober second thought, should withdraw or suspend the measure that has brought the discus sion to pass. It would have been far better had the settlement of these questions been left to diplomacy, instead of being seized upon pellmell by the Legis lature of a single State. Since a national treaty was involved, the matter of alien land ownership should have dealt with directly between Washington and Tokyo. But if the bill is to become a law, it must stand or fall by the decision of the courts. If it is ad judged to be in violation of the treaty between the United States and Japan, it will be void, for intcr- - national treaties are supreme law which no single State can contravehe. If, on the contrary, it involves no such violation, Japan has no ground for protest in t so far as this particular bill is concerned. In either event, a judicial test of the 1 *.w is the direct and logical way out of the present difficulty. Colquitt County’s Great Good Roads Campaign. One of the most interesting good roads enter prises in Georgia today is that of Colquitt county whose commissioners have undertaken to improve within the current year three hundred miles of pub lic highways. This ambitious task has been appor tioned among six crews of laborers, each under competent supervision and all working in accord ance with a general plan toward a common end. As a result, Colquitt county will have not only a large number of well built and durable roads, but it will have also a closely linked system of highways, so that trade and communciation between any point within its boundaries will be direct and easy. That is the great value of constructing voads according to a comprehens-, j design rather than piecemeal or independently. Each stretch of high way should be considered in its relationship to the roads as a whole and to the people’s common inter ests. Roads which are thus developed are perman- nent and diffusive in their usefulness. They quicken the progress of the entire community and tend to the upbuilding of both commerce and agriculture, of the town as well as the farm. They create a wider and keener sense of county pride and open the way for ail manner of constructivj and co operative endeavors. A particularly notable feature of the Colquitt coun ty work is its provision of means for maintaining the roads after they are improved. Much labor and money are often wasted by the neglect of this im portant need. The constant upkeep of roads is as important as their construction; and a compar atively small fund used in prompt repairs will save thousands of dollars to taxpayers. It is said that the farmers of Colquitt county have been instrumental in the enterprise that is now under way. They realize the vital need of good roads and, as The Journal’s corre^.-Men/ writes, “are demanding them at almost any price.” Cer tain it is that nothing is so costly to agricultural interests as poor roads. It is estimated that the cost of hauling, which amounts to millions of dol lars in the United States each year and to great sums of money in each State and county, could be cut in half, if the country were provided with an adequate number of well kept and closely linked highways. It is the part of economy as well as progress for every county to develop its roads. The liberal and far-reaching campaign of Colquitt should he a stimulating example to every community in Georgia. The Balkan Peace Treaty. Though the Balkan war virtually ended when Ad- rianople surrendered to the Bulgars, there has been subsequent fighting along the frontiers ‘ and several incidents which threatened to entangle the plans for peace have occurred. It is therefore doubly reas suring to learn that Bulgaria, Servia, Greece and Montenegro have all formally accepted the proposal of the Powers, and that hostilities will cease entirely pending the consideration of a peace treaty. Envoys from each of these States will proceed immediately to London, there to join with representatives of Tur nkey and of the larger nations in working out a satis factory settlement of boundaries, compensations and related issues. In these proceedings, Turkey will, play compar atively a minor and passive part. Utterly defeated by the little States whom she has heretofore so often thwarted in diplomacy, she must now accept rather than dictate or suggest terms; and, in fact, she has thrown herself on the mercy of the Powers, trusting to their own sense of self-interest to vouchsafe her whatever protection or privilege she may secure- The vital factors in the peace negotiations will he the Balkan allies and the great European Powers. Whatever agreement these may reach as to the di vision of territory and the adjustment of political problems must be accepted by the Ottoman govern ment. Turkey’s European realm will be reduced to a scant fragment of its former extent and Turkish in fluence will become but a shadow. One of the most difficult and delicate tasks of the peace conference will be the settlement of questions that have arisen or may arise among the Balkan States themselves. Having defeated the Turks, the Allies are now beginning to look more jealously to their individual interests. Each of them Is pressing its own claims as to boundaries and spht.„_ of influ ence. The determination with which Montenegro stood out for the possession of Scutari is but typical of a general, though less demonstrative, demand for all that can possibly he won anu neul in the tem.o.y to be partitioned. It Is evident, however, that the Powers are acting in effective concert so that their decision on the va rious issues that may arise will be conclusive. In any event, the big Balkan war is over and all Eu rope takes a breath of relief. True Conservation. In discussing the more liberal and constructive spirit that is now Infusing the conservation move ment, the Norfolk, Va., Pilot aptly remarks; “It isn’t enough to prevent our water courses from passing into the hands of private and special interests, to be exploited for their particular and immediate advan tage without thought or concern for the public’s rights and needs- Some means must he found for rendering this source of natural wealth available for the promotion of enterprise and for the development of fresh opportunities, without incurring the risk of wanton waste or the danger of monopolistic control.” What is true in this respect of water powers is equally true of all the stores of natural treasure. Conservation, when rightly interpreted and applied, means vastly mor- than mere preservation. It was to he expected that the first aim of this important movement would be the protection of streams and forests and mines against private greed and waste. Its first note was logically one of protest, for a time had come when resources that belonged to all the people and should tr held unimpaired for the needs of future generations were being sacrificed for the fortunes of a few men and were being monopolized by special interests. But conservation cannot end at this point, if its true mission is to he fulfilled. America’s natural treasure must be utilized for the public’s practical good, not indefinitely locke# up like a : User's hoard. It must be saved from selfish or unscientific exploita tion, but at the same time, in so far as is consistent with the laws of science and economy, it must be turned to fruitful account for the good oi uitj people of today. ■A THE TAX OF IGNORANCE BY DR. .FRANK CRANE. (Copyright, 1913, by Frank Crane.)’ The human race since time began has been preyed upon by parasites, bloodsuckers and thieves. History is but a record of the systematic, institutional plunder of the people by the shrewd and selfish few. It has been a lamb populace managed by wolf exploiters. Mankind has been taxed incalculably, taxed of money, blood, life. ' , But of all known taxes that of IGNORANCE has been the greatest, includes perhaps all other taxes. All the tyrannies of rulers, kings, upper castes and caoals v have not equalled in their pillage the amount robbed of humanity by Ignorance. All the pirates of the Spanish Main, all the buccaneers, freebooters, highway robbers, burglars and thugs have not taken from us so vast a pile of goods as has this same Ig norance. Not all the swindling schemes of mining shares,' watered railway stocks, wildcat investments, predatory trusts, stock exchanges, and money powers have so depleted us as Ignorance. All our loss by waste and profligacy cannot equal our loss by Ignor ance. Ignorance claims its cent per cent in all trades. Ninetenths of the failures are due to Ignorance. Boys enter into business untrained, uninformed; they go down in the struggle. The slums and prisons are full of men who stumbled into crime because they entered the battle for success without skill or weapons. Civilization systematically keeps its girls in ignor ance of the laws of their bodies, of the significance and functions of sex. The hordes of women wrecks that swarm in our cities is the resulting tax of Ignor ance. How much domestic tragedy is due to the same cause! Our entire literature teems with sex-sugges tion; we do everything to arouse passion, nothing to instruct it. In the way of hygiene what a measureless tribute the race has paid, to Ignorance. The pests of former ages, cholera, the black death and the red death, the multitude of corpses heaped up, simply because people did not know enough to keep clean! The myriad lives that have been darkened, and bodies tortured, by sincere but narrow men playing upon the common Ignorance of the unknown! This tax which the hierarchy has levied on tire light and joy of souls is perhaps most horrible of all. A tax due to pure Ignorance. War, it is impossible to pile up superlatives of execration, curses cannot be screamed too loud, to do justice to its abysmal infamy; and there never was a war that was not due to Ignorance. The spectre of every war shell arise on Judgment Day to point a de nouncing fing°r at the rulers of men; for it is only to cover their stupidity that the commons are led forth to slaughter. ‘‘There never was a war that could not have been better settled in some other way.” Add, then, to your tax of Ignorance all them that sleep in mounds by the Rappahannock, that perished at Lady smith, San Juan, or Sadowa, and all other of those orgies of blood and hate that fill the pages of history as the stars fill the sky. Think of the tax of economic Ignorance! Money piled up in extravagance here, and yonder human crea tures starving; all because we dqn’t know how to dis tribute the products of labor! v Look at til© human beings crowded like cattle into the street cars, look at the public everywhere insulted, bullied, assaulted, and we submit, because we don’t know how to help ourselves. Th© most economical thing the United States could do would be to spend a billion dollars more a year to give ALL children an education, and thus do what may be done to remove the taxation imposed by Ig norance. It is The Only Way! But when a man’s face is broken it never by any chance breaks into smiles. The Fight for Direct Primaries in New York.' A particularly interesting campaign in behalf of popular government as opposed to machine rule is now afoot in New York state, where an extra ses sion of the Legislature is soon to meet to deal with the Direct Primary bill. The purpose of this meas ure Is to enable the rank and file of a political party to choose their nominee for any office Instead of be ing compelled, * as is now the case, to accept the candidate of a convention which is more often than otherwise dominated by corrupt bosses. Its advo cates contend that under the party system of gov ernment, the people must control the parties, if they are really to control their government and that to this end they must he permitted to vote on nom inees as well as on candidates in the regular elec tion. Otherwise, particular interests can name their representatives as candidates of both or dll parties and leave the people to fight out a mock battle at the polls. This hill was defeated at the regular session of the Legislature by an alliance between Tammany and Republican bosses—the “Barnes-Murphy ma chine,” as it. is popularly known. On such an issue as this the selt-serving politicians know no party differences. The progressive forces are determined, however, that at the extra session the pressure of public sentiment and public judgment shall be brought to bear as heavily as possible upon those legislators who hesitate between loyalty to the peo ple and the machine. Governor Sulzer is showing qualities of true lead ership by using every influence at his command to break the power of the machine leaders. “The best of it is,” comments the New York Evening Post, “that Murphy’s hold on his machine now really seems to he loosening. As members of the organiza tion.- see one federal office - after another going to their party enemies, they must again curse the stu pidity that marked Murphy’s course at Baltimore, to which they are doubtless attributing Wilson’s anti- Tammany policy; though others may justly feel that the President’s attitude toward Tammany would have been the same had Murphy voted for him at the convention.” The man whois anxious to buy usually gets the worst of the bargain. The Standpatters’ Old Game. The demand of the Senate Republicans for new hearings on the Underwood tariff hill is obviously a bit of political strategy intended to delay and en tangle this all-important measure. For six weeks or more, the ways and means committee of the House was engaged in hearing the claims and protests of every interest that was concerned in tariff revision. TJhe’’reports of those proceedings would fill a volume of several thousand pages. The committee began holding sessions be fore the new Congress assembled and granted a full and free hearing to all who wished to present their views. It would, therefore, be merely a repetition of this work to reopen the hearings before the Senate finance committee. There Is no desire for precipi tate or ill-considered action on tariff revision, but the country has waited decades for a sorely needed reform in this field of its economic affairs. In this eleventh hour, when a bill that is fair and that is acceptable to the public has passed the House, re actionary efforts should not be countenanced. MOTHERS’ DAY, I went; to church this morning- and witnessed a beautiful \ religious ceremony commemorating the Mothers’ <Xay of the year 1913. I have no knowledge of th e starter or organizer of Mothers’ day, but I believe it has come to stay, as it seems to meet cordial welcome from both old and young. W e had recitations from some children and some excellent singing by the choir and congregation and all the people I noticed carefully had a carnation fas tened to their waists and coats. My flowers closely resembled what we called sweet pinks in my chid- hood, but they smell as sweet under their new and fashionable name of carnations. I also read a little poem since I returned from church which fits it rather nicely and gives the repentant girls’ side of the mother question. THE KISS. Last night I had to go. to bed All by myself, my mother said, ’Cause I’d been naughty all day through. She wouldn’t kiss me good-night, too. I didn’t want to let her know How much I cared ’bout that, and so I dropped my clothes right on the floor— A thing I never did before— And put each stocking in a shoe— She just hates that—and didn’t do My hair, or wash my face, or brush My teeth, and left things in a squash All ’round the room; and then I took Her picture and my fairy-book She gave me on my last birthday In June, and hid ’em both away. THE INCOME TAX III.—FIXING THE RATES. BY FREDERIC J. IIASKIN. When the ways and means committee of the house came to adopt the pending income tax bill as a part of the new tariff measure, there were many things it had to consider, but none of them of more importance or of wider bearing than the Ques tion of rates. Of course, the first test of an income tax law in this v country in particular, and in the world in general, is that it shall stand up under the stress of public sentiment. The universal experience has been that income taxes are unpopu lar at best when they are first levied. In time of great war crises, when nations realize that their very existence de pends upon drastic revenue measures, the people have been patient when income taxes have been levied even upon the small est incomes. But in times of peace it has required a long process of education to get the people to accept income taxation as a fair plan qt raising revenue. • * • In the present instance it has been hoped that these troublesome experiences in the readjustment of the public mind may be overcome in large measure by making the burdens of the tax fall upon the shoul ders of those who are able to bear it, and to make it descend upon them so lightly that no man will have to turn his face toward the poor house as a result. Whether or not this aim and hope will be realized re mains to b© seen. Certain it is, however, that the committee has framed a bill that fixes the exemptions very much higher and the rates very much lower than those of any other national income tax law. I put my father’s picture right Up in the middle pf the light, To show ’em just the way I feel, ’Cause he said, “Kiss the child, Lucille, Don’t let her go to bed like this Without your usual good-night kiss.” But she just shook her head and turned Her back, and then my eyes they burned Like fire. . . . It’s been a horrid day. . . . And then, of course, I didn’t say My prayers at all, but went to bed And wished and wished that I was dead. i Well, I don’t know just how it was, For I’d been half-way sleeping, ’cause I was so 'pletely* tired out— When I heard something move about So quiet, and the next I knew The door moved back and she came through And put her arm around m© so, And said, a-whispering very low, ‘‘My poor, dear child,” and was so sad, And kissed me twice—My! I was glad. —Harpers’s Magazine. • • • TEMPTATIONS AND SUGGESTIONS. It is a well understood fact that the Spanish mata dor uses a red flag or red shawl to make the bull in the ring rush to attack. Why red should be the color to inflame the mind of the beast I must leav^ to the scientist for explanation. I use the word “mind” for need of a better one, but the red flag or red scarf has been in use to in furiate the mad bulls of Spain for some centuries. What these red things suggest to the beast is beyond my ken, but the fact remains that he wants to fight, and he goes after the man who exploits the red, and will fight to the death. Suggestive evils are also common to humankind, when conditions are normal a man or woman may contain themselves and preserve self respect, but when there are morbid conditions, fevered brains, a domestic storm, strained nerves, dissipated habits, re verses in business, violent passion, morbid jealousy or sudden shock, it is only necessary to run up on a sug gestive picture or to be told something inflammatory by an evil-minded person, to fire up the brain and the deed is done! The red scarf is there. I am convinced that there are tens of thousands of prisoners who have waked up urjder the very shadow of the gallows tree, who could not explain how they came to do it. The old proverb says: “Evil communications cor rupt good manners,” but there is no need to make a proverb on the established fact that familiarity with criminal thoughts will engender criminal suggestions and crimnial temptations. Therein lies the danger of such elaborated stories, because they ar© the fuse in many cases to set off repeated explosions of continued violence. Leaving off the criminal part of this subject, there are also suggestions in “niide art” that are far from health to the average mind. While there are many sane and well-balanced people whose aesthetic sense is only appealed to, and they are able to separate in their minds the beautiful from the sensual. There are others whose inflamed imaginations may provoke what an able writer has called a “sensual debauch.” The “humn form divine” in nude Africa should always wear drapery in civilized America for reasons too ob vious to need explanation, and the half-naked dancer and singer, who is hired by rich debauchees in New York and other cities to fling herself about for their sensaul amusement, should be put qut of business by legal provisions. Th e licensed, gaudy, Godless drink ing resorts in large cities are responsible largely for the vice and criminality of such cities with the “scar let woman” **t hand. And may 1^ venture to remark that the nude exposure of a woman’s body anywhere, in theaters, in modern ball rooms or in the maze of a “dreamy waltz,” is a suggestive evil that should be abated by both law and gospel. I hasten to say also that I believe there are great numbers of decent wom en who wear very “decollete” apparel, and who live clean lives at home and abroad, but we do know that such “undressing” is more than oftentimes a menace to the chastity of men and youths, especially when the wine cup is near at hand, and the “dreamy waltz” becomes thrillingly attractive and where dance hugging is not reprobated by the customs of polite society. These are plain words from a very plain-spoken old lady, who is known to be chivalric in her devotion to her own sex and woh would do them always good and never any harm. BY JOHN •\K r . CAREY. Who hies from rural scrape the sky (although (See minutes of last mins gent. I-o-way, where cornstalks most every county in the commonwealth is dry)? W h o’s known as Hand some Albert to the populace back home—so tall and straight, with piercing eye and classic, shaggy dome? Who put the kibosh on the pass and fixed the 2-cent fare and chased the gang sters at Des Moines from out their comfy lair? Who’s played the game p o li 11 c a 1 way up to gover nor, and now who \ wars upon the trusts as U. S. senator? Who might consent, if duly urged, to be our pre sident? June in Chi.) That A. B. Cum- Remembering that it could aid in making the law popular by pursuing this course of low rates and high exemptions, at me same time it was necessary to fix the rates high enotigh to insure a sufficient amount of revenu© to make up the deficiencies of the treasury which will grow out of a reduction of tariff duties. The first effort was to ascertain th© probable income that will be brought into the treasury under the new tariff duties. This in itself is a task of large propor- ions and on© in which there are so many unfixable factors Except by experience, that at best the calcula tions may shoot wide of the mark. If it were possi ble to know what the volume of importations will be under the new law th© rest would be easy. But that depends on so manV things—the state of the public mind, the efforts of home manufacturers to readjust themselves to the competitive conditions to which it will giv© birth?, and a number of other conditions which defy accurate measure. • • • With this in mifld, and recalling the experience of the Wilson law and the overestimate of the revenues that would b© collected through it, the only course upon which the committee could safely calculate was to assume a safe minimum below which it would scarcely be possible for the country’s importations to go, and to estimate the customs revenues thereupon. Using this as the basis of its estimates, the commit tee calculated that the total revenues under the forth coming customs laws will amount approximately to $235,000,000. Now, the other income of the govern ment amounts to about $630,000,000, including postal revenues, and the total annual disbursements of the government, including postal expenditures, approx imate $950,000,000. It, therefore, follows that if the government is to keep even it must raise $330,000,000 a year by customs revenues and income taxes other than the corporation tax. So, if the tariff duties yield $266,000,000, It also follows that the personal income tax must afford a revenue of $65,000,000. With this situation In mind, the question next turned upon the amount of taxable personal incomes there are in th e United States. Having decided that $4,000 shall be exempt, in order to prevent the ta\ from being burdensome, and that only suen income , as is above that amount is taxable, it became a prob lem to measure the number of people in the United States who get more than $4,000 a year, and the total amount of their excess of income over their exemp tions. And the standards by which it might accu rately be measured do not exist. We know that about 65,000 corporations out of nearly 300,000 are enjoying incomes of more than $5,000, or only a few more than one out of six. And we also know that with the ex emption at $1,000 and even less after and during the Civil war, there were comparatively few taxpayers. It is also plain, when on© counts noseS am^ng those about whose incomes he knows something, that there are comparatively few people who get $4,000 a year, but further than that no one knows accurately, and the best that can b© done is to borrow a page from English experience and then compare our own situa* tion as closely as may be. 9mm A few years ago England had taxable incomes, with an exemption up to $800, amounting to $3,500,000,000. Of this (and these figures reckon $5 to the pound sterling, which is, of course, a little over the real value), incomes of from $800 to $2,000 contributed $850,000,000, incomes ranging from $2,000 and $3,500 contributed $300,000,000, and incomes ranging •be tween $3,500 and $5,000 contributed $445,000,000. As suming that the natural proportion of this $445,000,- 000 was contributed by incomes ranging between $3,- 500* and $4,000, it will be seen that of the total in comes amounting to $3,600,000,000, approximately $2,- 150,000,000 represents incomes in excess of $4,000. Figuring upon a comparative basis of national wealth and population we find the national wealth of the United States is one and five-eighths times as great as that of England, and if income bears the same ratio to wealth i- both countries there would be tax able incomes amounting to about $3,500,000,000 in the United States. Assuming that the average of taxable incomes would take a 2 per cent rate, the total taxes would approximate $70,000,^00, which would, however, include the‘corporation tax. • |= JUST SMILES =" • Three traveling companions, Gray, Brown and Green, were breakfasting at a hotel in the south. Gray or dered coffee, rolls, creamed potatoes, bacon and fried eggs; Brown told the waiter he might duplicate the or der for him, and Green said: v , “You may bring me the same, all but the eggs—you may eliminate the eggs.” In due time the waiter appeared with the break fasts of Gray and Brown, which he served; then, step ping around to Green he said, in a conciliatory voice: “We got fried eggs an’ poached eggs an’ boiled eggs an’ scrambled eggs and om’let, sah, but we ain’t got no ’liminated eggs. “Well,” said Green, “my doctor says my eggs must be eliminated. Have it done at once and hurry up my breakfast.” Presently the waiter was back again, but without the breakfast^ • “The cook says tell you, sah,” he said, “he jes’ can’t Timinate no eggs dis mawnin’.” ’ “Now, see here,” said Green, in apparent anger, “I never before was at a hotel where I could not h^ve my eggs eliminated. Go tell the cook that and tell him to eliminate those eggs double sudden or I shall complain to the manager.' Away went the waiter, but returned almost imme diately, followed by the cook. “I come to 'splain to you myse’f ’bout dem eggs; sah,” said the excited chef. “I ain’t been here on’y a week an’ I don’t w n’ to lose my job an’ dis is de ve’y first ordah I had foh’ ’lim’nate eggs since I come. I was goin’ to ’lim-nate 'em right off, but I looked 'round for he ’lim’nator i.ey ain’t got none. Co’se I can’t ’lim’nate eggs ’thout a Timinator, but ’Is goin to have the boss git one dis ve’y day an’. If you’ll 'scuse me this mawnin’ nex’ time you come' I’ll ’lim’nate yo* eggs better’n yo’ve evah had ’em ’lim- ’nated befo’!”—Lippincott’s.