Newspaper Page Text
A __ -r } - JL/1 L : -rtjr __ w’-. '
; r * Sll 1 J . 1
Established 1866.
vol. xxxi n.
' mm AND INDUSTRY
SOME ITEMS OF INTEREST TO
UNION WORKMEN.
Hoctaltits l.o*o toy Five to One—Governor
TltD'ior I’ropow* » Korandy for *ltu
Htlnii* l.tko Th it at 4 irden—Gcnerul
bailor >otc«.
Tlio Solitary Hen per,
(An Ok! Favorite.)
Behold her, slngF tn the field.
Yon solitary Highland lass!
Reaping and singing toy herself,
Stop here, or gently puss!
Alone she cuts and hinds the grata,
And sings a melancholy strain;
Oh lisGo’ f.,r the vale profound
fs overflowing with the sound.
No n!gtitmg alf did ever chant
Mere w. !<■< nne non to weary tiands
Of travtd' Vs In rom" shady haunt,
Among Arabian rands
Such tbnlltiiK- o'ce w&8 never heard
tn t-pr ring-time from the cuckoo-bird,
Mreafei r:g the sttornce of the seas
Among tho farthest Hebrides
Will no. one tell me what she sings?
Perhaps the plaintive numbers flow
For old, unhtip; y, far-off things,
And battles to ago
Or ts it some mo) humble lay.
Familiar matter of to-day?
Bome natural sorrow, loss, or patn,
That has been, and may be again?
W'hafe’er lhe them* lhe maiden sang
An if her stir; ic¬ could have no ending;
J raw her Bing es in g at, her work.
And n’l’C thi a Okie bending,
I listen'd, motionless and still:
And when I mounted t>V the hill,
The mss c In my toeut bore.
Long after it was heard no more.
—W ords worth
One Dime .III)- Right Off,
(Contributed by a Laboring Man.)
When Governor Tanner said that he
took the course at Yirden that he did
because he believed that under the elr
eumstancos his official judgment die
ta ted the sam** to him as the best, he
gave probably the strongest defence of
hi- action- one that is not likely to be
successfully assailed; certainly not by
indictment that proceeding, on calm
or thought, appearing to be
tlj| wrong way to take the governor to
account.
But when Mr. Tanner approaches
the most difficult task of suggesting
what laws shall be framed to prevent
the recurrence of such conditions as
made S irden posBlble.he is not so hap¬
py In his selection, measured by the
standard of feasibility. A few days
■*go lie said;
"Wo have in Illinois 45,000 miners
and 70,000 railroad men. The late
labor trouble in my state was not a
light against negro laborers, as it has
been reported, but was simply a fight
against, the principle of men invading
our state from other states under arm
cd protection, 1 believe the laws of
Immigration, should apply as between
the states as well as between different
countries.
Application of federal immigration
laws to removal from one state into
another is the suggestion. Letting
aside discussion of the merits or de
merits of such a rule, it is pertinent to
note just what, must be done to make
such application possible. lhe four
teeut-h amendment to the constitution
of the United States, which went in
to effect July 28, 1S6S, provides that:
“All persons born or naturalized in
the United States, and subject to the
Jurb diction thereof, are citizens of «ie
United States, and of the state where
in the) re. ide. No state aim 11 make or
enforce any law which shall abridge
the privileges or immunities of clti
zens-.f the United States.”
Wlmt are the ‘‘privileges or Hamlin
iti">. of citizens of the United States?”
Fart * of section 2 of article IV of the.
federal constitution defines some of
them as follows:
J lie . ,
citizens of each state shall be
entitled to nil privileges and immtmi
iii-- of citizens in the several states.”
\eiv short. It means that any cit
Izen of Alabama has exactly the same
standing in Illinois aa has a native of
T lilmoiF; boundaries who has of Illinois. never been The outside
amend
mem . '■* quoted was adopted after
.
the civil war for the specific purpose
of extending to citizens 0 f color the
f-amo right enjoyed by whites under
i n- par t (it article F> quoted.
it follows that a revision of the
fundamental law of the nation would
be m-ces-wry t 0 accomplish even so
apj.ui nt y easy a thing as Gov. I an
msidu.uions Z«*;T n - such as this show,
‘ ‘ a 1 U ° ch a ,lgf ' ih "" I<! eVer be at ‘
t ti .opted, n . but . that , . whenever changes
tnmU;n;;‘ ’ ' ‘ ‘ > ’ Ula N ^ arefu t?# \° Bt ! "dy h H f0VmUa of the *
. X . ned
fUtU ’ ?U Ct detemina -
ti*m i rn, . ...oil the in its f° application l>e U f lhe pr01,0sed to the al “
. man
tm 1 l.?».‘nU Ilor m * U,d gr< :iltairs ‘ at majority of rm;n of - a
T , s. is
productive of good when accomplish
tMj,
N,,te “’
The ry, miii-jlvanla State
U’.g ;UfV ‘ remaiU iU 111 Harrt8bur se *#a S
’
-r
^ U U no,s want
rZ Increase 4 of “movpraJn, Urn m, n . . WaKeS A1
h -
, eecure tb ‘ 8 ad
van e ha begun
Denmark exports cauliflower seed
Au-trm, France, Great Britain.
many, Russia, South America and
1 mti'd states,
UdLLita'l!. Ttl , !ee Vever, ?U“! r,f m 00mlngt0n , ■
haa decided that the ’
"union labor
ly” clause in contractu has no
before the court.
t.nn* exports of domestic
disc in 1898 1 wtll W ;! r!,ount *•------- to over -
-ec ' - ' , Ih, ‘ ‘ n'K'd Kingdom
Si°t!iJu”$1 :
oTI™ ndlM VahleJ
Citgo ^.SiSSSU«, and Nortls M0 t„,
western railway
tern who has been In the service less i
than two years will be given a dis- 1
charge as a New Year’s present. j
"One of the most remarkable and ;
hopeful industrial movements noted
In the south of late years/' says the
American Miller, Mg the present ten¬
dency to curtail the cotton acreage j
and to enlarge that devoted to wheat.” j
about Changes 141.000 in the rates of wages report- of j j
work people were
cd to the British board of trade dur¬
ing October, of which number 1.40,300
received advances, and TOO sustained
decreases. The net result was an in¬
crease estimated at about 8 ! 4d per |
imad in the weekly wages of those af¬ j
fected. S
A meeting of much Importance to j
the printing crafta will be held In ,
J’iUsburg on'Jan, 8 between represen- j j
tat Ives of the International Typo . \
graphical union, the International I
Fruiting Pressmen and the Interna
tional Brotherhood of Bookbinders. A
representative of the lithographers i
may also he present. !
i
< u bans are fast catching onto Am
eriran laborers ways. Last 1 uesday
lhe Cubans constructing u quarter- i
master’s warehouse struck, demanding ;
13 a day in gold. They were receiving
25 cents, American money, for eight 1
hours’ work, in addition to rations.
The tight against the proposed new
departure was led by President Com
pers, and it is simple justice to say
that by this fight the veteran head of
the federation lias not only perform¬
ed a great deed for the cause of labor,
but has materially added to his pres- I
tige and weight among those who
take a conspicuous part In shaping 1
the policies and conducting the cam
paigns of labor.
The eighteenth annual convention !
of the American Federation of Labor j
advanced the cause of labor In two
ways—by some things it did. and by
refusal to do some things it was ask-|
ed to do. By a vote of nearly five to j
ono It refused to adopt resolutions
which declared that the only way to j
Insure to labor its Just reward and ■
proper recognition was to cast aside!
existing thenj Institutions and substitute for j
straightqut,. uncompromising so-!
cialisxn, and that this step should be
at once taken. What It did adopt, tn
stead, by an equally decisive Aote, was
this:
"We heartily recommend the cordial
acceptance of all assistance that may
be given by the trade union movement
by all reform forces, the socialistic
political parties included. The hope
and aspiration of the trade union Is
closely akin to that expressed by the
socialists. That burdens of toll may
be made lighter,that men shall possess
larger liberty, that the future shall he
better than the past, may properly be
the Ideals of those of all movements
which -rally- desire labor emancipa
tion. We appreciate, however, that
men, because of different environment
through life, must of necessity reach
different conclusions, if not as to the
end to he attained, certainly aa to the
roads to be traveled to the goal de¬
sired, We affirm the trade union
movement to be the legitimate channel
through which the wage earner of Am
: erica should secure present and future
emancipation We hold that the
trades unions o' America, as compris
j ed in the American Federation of La¬
bor, do not now and never have de
dared against the discussion of econ
omlc and political questions in the
meetings of their respective unions,
| We are committed against the indorse
j \ merit .or the introduction of partisan
political or religious differences or
! race prejudices. We hold it to be the
; duty of trades unions to study and
j discuss all questions that have any
| bearing upon industrial or political
! liberty, but we declare that it. is not
j .within the province of the American
Federation- of Labor to designate to
which political party a member shall
belong or for which political party he
shall vote.”
Never was a fiercer fight waged In
the Federation for the substitution of
socialistic for trades union principles;
never did the champions of the former
j coine more sure of victory, more intol
i eraut of contradiction; never was
their defeat more signal; never, and
j this Is the result of their attempts,was
the federation so firmly planted on
i those conservative, progressive
j principles that enable ft to come
to state and federal legislatures and
1 ! executlvea enforcement and of ask laws for enactment and
looking to the
i grpater reward . the fuller considera
; tion of labor.
i ln an at ' drp ss to the convention, in
reply to the argument in support of
j 'he socialistic resolution, Mr. (tampers
I Wid in part:
"The very men who advocate and
ask us to commit ourselves to this
1 movement have, in the past done all
;r aian One ™ of d ° the to parties — referred — Lilt- to
called a convention to form a rival to
this federation. At that convention
they, on a broad streamer, emblazon¬
ea 111 letters of red, "Wreck the Old
j Trades Unions and Pull for Soclal
ism.” They have attacked conserva
Item and everything that Is ground for
j °ur cause. If their proposition WflfD
' llk<?1 Y ,0 advance the interests of la
bor 1 would * ive it my adherence at.
I once * bllt Knowing, as 1 do, that every
. been followed by Ln era'of hu'rtlL ' and
indifference, I cannot ... suhficrihe to it.
Rather than turn our un ; on« Into ward
i we are wortdll g on the line that
11 be,,er 0Ur "''ureHts before the
! wiu >l« «>«ntry. I. know that progress
i is necessarily slow, and there is no
! such thing as a” short cut to the mil
lenium T am guru that we are on
- the path of
we- pain progress, which we are
; following; the day of labor Is at the
: e,lf5 ° f thal ,an «’ We should be
i * d comprehensive "TT broad
! an(l :u ‘ <h « flay ?"““ of labor's in all emancipation that *• we do
i tv III soon come,”
M WE APPLAUD THE EIGHT AND CONDEMN THE WRONG ”
JEBUP. GA.. THURSDAY, JANUARY 12, 1809,
TO RULE Til E WORLD.
phis SEEMS TO BE THE DES
TINY OF ISRAEL.
The Money-Lender Is Fast Gaining o
Position In Whleto Ho Can Ulotnto
to AU of the Governments of the
Earth.
I was deeply interested in the article
of Romesh Dutt and the editorial of
your Issue of December 8 on the' sub*
left, "Shall Israel Rule the World?”
The public generally ought to be en
lightened on that subject; It. is one of
intense interest to the whole world,
... . fe of the
a ’ A ; ur( ‘ aware
«P«^«y the vvorld on the subject ,, , of f
f ‘ " n 1 b >’ ^ T"* people 7 - Y V'l that until he
^ 5“ hr dI 8,mn « hure k »» l and T vorkl trnmiry east the nd
»*«. *°«W ® no more ' permit ; the ;‘ tak
mg of interest on money, or anything
e | ae| fi laQ the commission of any other
crime against the ten commandments
i eve | their denunciations. This Is as
well attested as anv fact ln history.
fj»tll then Interest on money was us¬
ury without regard to rate, ft war,
not allowed by the common law of
England. According to tlu* Mosaic
law the Jew was not permitted to take
interest from a Jew, hut he might of
the stranger or gentile. England and
Holland led off in the apostasy to le¬
galize usury, to win the Jew* money
lenders to their side of the political
contest between Protestant and Catbo
lie Europe. In that It succeeded, rt
put the Jew money lender to the front
in political Protestantism Sn those
countries.' Since then the apostasy
has become almost universal. Evers
the Roman Catholic church, that for a
long time resisted. It. now seems to ac¬
quiesce with the rest - of the world,
However, in an encyclical letter, May
15, 189.1, the present pope said. In
speaking of the measures that oppress
the working classes of the world:
"The evil has been increased by rapa
clous usury, which more than once
condemned by the church, is never¬
theless, under different forms, but
with the same gilt, practiced by avari¬
cious and grasping men.” As a Latin
and Bible scholar he undoubtedly used
the word "usury” as meaning the same
as interest, as it does in all early
church and Christian literature. This
apostasy now begins to bear fruit; the
Jew money power everywhere farms
public and private debt and uses Its
vast resources to corrupt the officials
and law-makers of the nations on
these subjects.
in 1691 the bank of England was
chartered, to enable the money lenders
to reap two interests at the same time
on the same principal. It was pro¬
vided that it should hold bonds of the
nation to secure and on which to base
its issues of notes. Its stockholders
thus draw interest on the bonds of
the nation exempt from taxation and
at the same time loan the notes of the
bank at interest based on and secured
by* the bond. That is, two Interests at
the same time on the same principal
and capital, the nation’s bond and the
bank’s note. This was seen by- the
money lenders to be such a fine
scheme that they decided the hank
must be perpetual. To accomplish
this, a part at least of the public debt
of the nation must be made perpetual.
And the aristocratic and Jew money
lending classes have seen to it, by suc¬
cessions of wars, that the public debt
of England has reached such propor¬
tions that only the interest on its prin¬
cipal can be paid. This influence has
stirred up and made wars in Europe
to the end that all its governments
should likewise become bonded in pub¬
lic debts so great that only the annual
interest can be paid.
In France, Spain and Italy this limit
has been exceeded, and they are on
the verge of bankruptcy. The Jews* of
London, Paris and Berlin can bank¬
rupt the government of any of those
countries any day. England ie in no
better condition, only that she robs
and plunders her dependencies, and
thus for a time keeps up appearances.
For Instance, the English government
of India had robbed and plundered the
starving people of that country of
1100,000,000, to be held as a famine ex¬
igency fund. When the famine came
again as usual and the people were
starving, inquiry was made for the
famine fund and the aristocratic
thieves were compelled to admit that
it had been stolen and misappropriat¬
ed. Wars and standing armies have
been the prolific means of thus blank¬
eting these nations in perpetual inter¬
est-drawing debts. The bank of Eng¬
land system of double interest has
been copied and duplicated in this
country and many others, wherever
British toryism and the Jew money
Power can so far corrupt the govern¬
ments of the nations as to accomplish
H- It is the financial prop and stay
of British imperial toryism. Of course
if such money systems could exist in
the countries thus attacked by this
devilish influence as would enable
their labor and production to more
than pay their annual interest and
taxes, and thus reduce and in time pay
the principal of these perpetual debts,
public and private, they would in the
course of time loose the grasp of the
Jew money power from their throats.
This must he prevented at all events;
ter lag the bank of England; annd the
hence the Tory-Jew money power,
with headquarters in London,
enacted the gold standard in
England in .1844, in re-charter
ing the bank of England; and the
American Tory power, during and
since the late civil war, has been fol¬
lowing the wake of British Toryism,
and has now made the RetmhRra« *<•*:
ty its Trojan horse, in which to stalk
m on tnr- American people and rob and
plunder them of their industrial liber¬
ty and make them debt serfs like the
people of Europe, Thus far they are
succeeding. Every movement of the
Tories discloses the antecedents and
purposes of the British policy. Noth¬
ing like the present, conditions of the
nations and people of Christendom
was ever known before In the history
of the race. If marks a crisis in the
history, of civilization.
O. D. JONES.
CURRENT COMMENTS.
Senator Morgan regards the opposi¬
tion to his bill for the Nicaragua canal
as purely obstructive, intended to pre¬
vent the canal being built at a!!. He
could prove that fact if his bill had
provided for direct government con¬
st ruction, ownership and operation,
which ft does not, says- the San Fran¬
cisco Star. If the canal admits even
the little finger of a private corpora¬
tion and it becomes law, that corpora¬
tion will got away with the whole
property, and it will follow the ex¬
ample of the Panama route In becom¬
ing part of a transportation trust with
the Southern Pacific.
A brilliant light has been cast on
the actual cost of transportation ser
vice by the contracts for the trass
poriatlon of 1.200 New York soldiers
from San Francisco to that city, The
rate Is $1.90 t o Sacramento and $16.30
thence to Ogden—-about 900 miles. But
from Ogdon to New York city they are
to be carried 1,925 miles for $9 SO. The
first rate, over a line controlled
the Southern Pacific monopoly, Is
nearly two cents per mile, the other
«„ out mrte over half h a cent T v w .
rate , of , $1.99. r from u here to . Sacramento,
is 49 cents more Jhan the regular sec
ond-class rate, The I n man com
pany made no bid, but will cuatge ^ t re
regular extortionate rate of *20.iA
extra.
As an antidote to Loudism we sug¬
gest, a parcels post, under which any
article now mailable can be sent at
two cents per pound, limited in weight
to ten pounds.
The only way to regulate a natural
monopoly Is for the people to own it.
The monopoly corporations are al¬
ready active in Cuba; street railway
stocks Jumped, in Havana, from S4 to
99, and others advanced similarly. The
American West Indies syndicate had
already secured “concessions" for rival
lines, and had begun construction of
a road, when the existing "Ferro Car
rit TJrbano,” paying them *30,000,
forced them to quit, under a law of
185P. This indicates that between old
Spanish laws and new American "con¬
cessions" the Cubans arc to be effect¬
ually squeezed before they can have
the least opportunity to establish gov¬
ernment ownership. There is no rea¬
son why old Spanish laws against pub¬
lic policy should be recognized either
under American control or Independ¬
ence. Better start with a clean slate.
Sixteen to One or Him.
\^th over two hundred millions in
gold locked in the treasury to keep up
Its priqp, and with money daily leav¬
ing the regular channels of trade as a
result of an unnecessary bond issue,,
says the Journal of Agriculture,wheat,
cotton and all other American staples
of export must continue to be forced
down.
The first year of good crops abroad
will *ee prices in this country so low
as a result of this government’s Insane
policy of "bulling’' gold against our
producers, that wo will not get money
enough from abroad to settle balances
and pay our enormous debt of usury
to the English and continental plutoc¬
racy,
Mr. -Bland estimates that we owe five
billion dollars to England alone. If
allowed to use silver and treasury
notes freely at home, we might pay the
interest on this enormous debt in gold.
But when gobf Is made the sole stand¬
ard for all debt, domestic and foreign,
when all the staple crops with which
we must pay when we have rn money
are measured in gold and
by It, collapse is inevitable. The free
coinage of silver at sixteen to one is
our only possible escape from strin¬
gency after stringency, from panic
after panic.
No debtor nation of agricultural ex
porters can survive the gold standard.
For the whole country it is sixteen to
one or bust.
A Pertinent TAIk on Money.
The gold standard plutocrats say
they want sound money, an honest,
dollar, a dear dollar, a dollar that will
buy the most, because it is In the in¬
terest of labor Now let us Investigate
this and see If it i* true. They want
the dollar that will bay the most. Buy
the most of what, I ask? They say,
of the things that people need to live
on, wear and use. Do the plutocrats
produce these things? No. Then who
does produce them? I answer: Labor
produces everything that man needs.
Who. gets the benefit of the high pric¬
ed or dear dollar? The people who
produce all things useful, or the men
who have or can control the dollars
and must buy the things the people
produce? If it is in the interest of
labor to have a high priced or dear
dollar, of whom must the people buy
the things they need, in order to get
the benefit of the dollar which buv S
much? Surely not to get from the.
Producers (labor) the things he needs
to live on, wear and use. Do you
think the p. itoerat would favor a dear
dollar, if a cheaper dollar were more
to bis interest? Not much! He is
j not Journal built of that Agriculture. way,—C J, Bowlby in
ANCIENT FEASTS.
Much Gluttony Among UieOld Greet,* ami
l*ersmns;.
“Bright Sides of History” is a i;er
ies of papers contributed by E, H.
House ‘
to St. Nicholas. In the last
number the author says:
Enormous feasts were spread at the
Persian and other Asiatic courts, and
the great Grecian conqueror of tb oae
regions was once or twice in his daz¬
zling career more lavish than even the
the successors of Otssstr. But it was
not a regular habit with him, nor was
reckless prodigality ever a vice of his
nation. Of course, there were excep¬
tions, and that societies devoted to
Insurious living existed in Athens we
know from the works of Arehost-rahre
and Athemeus, who wrote long poems
to the glory of cookery. The Hellenic
epicures were ingenious and often fan¬
tastic in their ideas, but were not, aa
a rule, gniliy of gross extravagance.
They were fond of such conceits as
having a whole pig served, one side
roasted and the other boiled, and
stuffed with a great variety of delica¬
cies, although the animal had never,;
been cut or separated in any way.
Their cooks were also skilful in pre¬
paring vegetables to taste like meat.
A certain king had an intense long¬
ing for a fish called an “aphy,” at a
time when he was so far away from the
sea that he did not suppose his desire
could possibly be artificial tratified; but, bis
cook made him an aphy out
of a turnip, and disguised it so
cleverly by sauces that the monarch
Was completely deceived. Occasion¬
ally we hear of voracious gluttons
among the old Greeks, One of the
most noted was Philoxenns, who
ho l,al a neok * iko a « rano * «°
:iat fn;;oymont of wlmt , he swal
lowed could be lengthened by several
inches. This selfish fellow used to
llig throal in (l , liniu< , by gargling
u vvit!l seallHng y ., lter . Then he
bribed tbe coo ks, wherever he went,
Rj a y the meals furiously hot;
and thus he finished the best there
was of each dish, before anyone else
dared to touch a morsel. A fellow
guest was once so; ofi'emled at this
that he refused to remain at the table
of rhiloxcnns, saying that he had
been invited to dine with a man, and
not with au oven.
WORDS OF WISDOM.
Do nothing carelessly or in a hurry
Be sure you are right, then go ahead.
To preserve credit, do not use it
much.
There is no such thing as dishonest
success.
Always be at the bead of your own
business,
“Look One step onward, and secure
that step.”
Watch the little Leaks, and you can
live on your salary.
Inscribe on your banner; “Luck is
a fool; pluck is a hero.”
Be generous. Meanness makes ene¬
mies and breeds distrust.
Be there a minute before time, if
yon have to lose a dinner to do it.
There is no open door to the temple
of success, no royal road to your
triumph.
Don’t try to begin on top. Begin
at the bottom, and you will be surer
of reaching the top, some time.
Make all the money you can hon¬
estly; do all the good you can with it
while you live; be your own executor.
One of the rocks on which young
business men full is lack of capital. A
young man should hesitate to embark
in business, no matter bow thoroughly
equipped in education and training,
until he has sufficient capital.
Militarism Iti Austria.
An extraordinary story of military
tyranny reaches uic from Koloinea, in
Galicia, A lieutenant of dragoons, ac¬
companied by six privates, entered
the Central Hotel there and demanded
a room. The proprietor, Herr Buekc.tr
stein, politely informed the officer that
the hotel was quite full and he could
not accommodate him. The lieuten¬
ant replied that a room must be found
for him, and approached the door of a
chamber already occupied by a guest.
Finding it locked, ho ordered his men
to smash it in. Herr Buckenstem pro¬
tested against this outrage, and threat¬
ened to report the aggressive officer to
the military authorities. The officer
thereupon rushed at Herr Rneken
steiu with his drawn sword, pursued
him into the street, and, overtaking
him, slashed at him with savage fury.
Herr Buckenstem received terrible
skull wounds, and was carried bleed¬
ing and unconscious into the hotel. A
crowd which had gathered attempted
to mob the officer, who at once called
his six dragoons, and charged the peo¬
ple with drawn swords, hitting out
wildly right and left. The officer then
re-entered the hotel, shouting that he
must have a room. On Herr Rucker!
stein’s aged father reproaching him
for liis violence, the military blusterer
assaulted the old man, and knocked
him down with a blow with the flat of
his sword. Some idea of the rampant
militarism in Austria will he gained
when I add that the officer and Ms
men are still at largo, and no steps
are being taken to bring them to jus¬
tice,—Vienna Correspondence Lon¬
don Daily Mail.
Hi« Narrow IkSOtpe.
An English officer whose ship was
stationed on the coast of Ceylon went by
for a day’s shooting, accompanied
a native attendant. Coming to a
particularly inviting river, the officer
resolved to have a bath, and asked the
native to show him a place where
there were no alligators. The native
took him to a pool close to the estuary.
The officer thoroughly enjoyed his
dip, and, while drying himself, he
asked hiN guide why there were never
any alligators an that pool. "Because,
sar,” promptly replied the Cingalese,
they plenty Laid of shark,”
WIT AND HUMOR.
Up*t0*Date Jokes oml Witticisms front
Comte Press,
IT5W HAVE CHOSEN.
The old man sat in bis easy choir,
Thinking Smoking his pipe of clay;
of the dozen daughters
At home, unmarried, this day.
Ho thought of those who
came
In search of a bonny bride.
“Many have called, but, just the same,
Tew have chosen,” he sighed.
THU jSMARIi boy's RBl’toY.
Teacher—What letter is that,
in y ?
Tommy—-That is Q.
“Bight. Now, Willy, tell me
is the next letter ?”
'MSr-er-er—I don’t, know,
“What comes at the end of dinner
“Oh 1 pie, ma’am!'’
AM, IIBADV FOR A BROXBNtNO.
John Doe—How will Spain ever
anothernuvy ?
Bjchard lioe—-Oh, I suppose
will begin at the bottom and work up.
A SECESSAHV DM.AY.
Nodd—“When are you going
move into that furnished
taken V” - -
Todd—“Just as soon as the
who own it have taken out ail the
sirable furniture.”
MAKINO IT EFFECTIVE.
“I’ll give you thirty, days in
Workhouse,” said lire Judge.
ought to give yon six mouths. ”
“Thanks for the, clemency,”
the culprit.
“No clemency at all, I assure
1. am afraid if yon stayed that
you might get used to it and not
it, ”
I'HO FJBSgrON a i. tie p a ktbe.
“Look at me,” exclaimed the
ing lawyer, warmly. “I never took
a drop of medicine in my life, and
as strong as any two of your patients
put together. ”
“Well, that’s nothing,’’ retortc
ilift physician. “I never wont to law
in my*life, and I'm as rich as any t
dozen of your clients, put together.”
ns vANiZD to am.
Commuter (who just missed his
train, t,o porter at railway station)—
Get me a mirror in a hurry.
Porter.....What for?
Commuter—I want to sea-the silly
expression on my face ! .
STIFF AS INSPIRATION,
Poet’s Wife—Algernon, you used
to nay before we were married, that
would ho a constant inspiration to
yon.
Poet—Ton arc, ray dear. Yon are
constantly reminding me of things
yon need. If I didn't have you to
provide for J wouldn’t think of half
the things 1 do to write about.
ME It PREDICAMENT*.
Mrs. Bargain—What are you worry
big about this morning ?
Bargain -I need some new clothes
and a bicycle, and J. can’t make up
my mind whether to get the clothes
at a store where they give away bicy¬
cles, or to. buy the bicycle at a shop
where they give away clothes.
her revenge.
“I used artist. to be ” engaged to a young
woman
“la that so?”
“Yea, sir; and last year she visited
uiy wife and painted a pond lily and the
•cattail panel b>r every iooui in
house. ” * *
intended to stay’. 1
“No, we can’t get rid of our cook.”
“What have you ’tried ?”
“Fvorvthinv L }*«,% Fhanced milkmen w,
«*
tal the Hi« director trm.br the
l aifj i.ilicetuiin uuil b,‘light
stove.”
...........* »»”»•”
a man of x.NowLKDtm,
Average Woman — “How am I to
fcnpw which is poison ivy and which
ihtl’l
Average Man—“By looking at it,
,»f course. How else would you
Subscription $1.00 Per Year.
NO. 3.
Plant System.
PASSENGER SCHEDULES.
READ DOWN. READ UP.
25“' "31 " j sf~r'8rr~~ tImjTcam) jsrrw & 22
Daily: Daily, Dally; Daily Tn Effect Nov. 19, 1898. j Daily; Daily! Daily Daily
.. ...j...... 1 ......12 9 00p 05a 12 9 09p, 30aiLv.....New Philadelphia York.....Ar ill 3 03i»j 6 Mad...*. 60a!.... I j.. . .
...... 25p! .. ,,, 25a; 3 Mai....
......:...... 23<n 2 ... Baltimore .... 9 02a! I .....
......1------ 4 30aj 8.46p ..Washington... .?'4l» : It lOp!.....i.....
...... ...... 9 05al 7 30 p ....Richmond... 4 00a! G 40p............
......! 2 05(1 U 15 r>! 'H r, 12(1 ... Charleston ... 439p ; 6 13a'.....1.
•_ o 00a 5 _13p: 3 20if 35a ... Savannah .... 12 15pi l2 15a 9 20a- 7 00f.
..... i 8 17a* 6 67|iJ 1 56aTO 00aj£*......Jesnp.....10 47a 10 36f> 7 31aj 5 *26pj !
dm* e Hill .... Way-cross .... ],v 9 50a 9 3f)p 6 20a* 4 20pi.
.. Brunswick .... 1 7 45a 7 00}) ...... i......
2 .....Albany..... ...... 3 3()p rwm ......i.
....._
.... Columbus..... ......! 10 00a 5 20r.
4- I 4 1 ......M aeon ...... ......;n aoa ti 25p ..
y lil 7 .... .Atlanta...... ......; 7 50a 1 7 SOp
1 -1 oSgf S9p- . . St. JacksoavlUe Augustine.,. ., ......! sota'7 (mV./: v •ioop.:
II lui .. 5 85p
12 2 23pj -iopi 4-ISpj i»40pi ... Gainesville... 315a! 3 45pi______
...... Ocala...... 1 36a* 1 45p
• 1 7 6 05j. 7 65p! .....Tampa..... 7 37p HI 05 ,h ...... I.,
......'ll 22p;.. «*!.. 12 56 p ... V aldosta ..., ...... fi 21p 4 03a;;.. :
......12 7 i 2 20p 3Pp . Thomasviile .. ....... 510p .. 2 f,0a 45pt,.. ....
45a 9 ., Montgomery .. .. 10&0n; 7
8 8 Kin! Kin . 7 40a .. New- Orleans .. .. 7 45p 7 55a!...
.! 7 7 00;. 00pi......! . 0 50a ..... Nashville .... .. 1 34a 9 00,i
..
7 05a!........ 4 05p ... Cincinnati ,, 4 o5p 11 00|ij...
All trains except Nos. 23, 32, 85 and 78 make all local stops.
Pull man buffet sleeping cars are operated-as follows: No-. 35 and 32 between New
York and Jacksonville. New York and Port Port Tampa Tampa via via West West Coast. Coast, Waveross Waycross and and Cin¬
cinnati .Savannah via Montgomery. Nos. 23 and 78 between New York and Jacksonville. No.
21 and Montgomery, and connects at Waycross with sleepers- to- St. Louts via
Montgomery; -to Nashville .via Atlanta, and Port Tampa via Jacksonville and Sanford.
No. 24 Montgomery and Savannah.
Steamships leave o Port Tampa for Key West and Havana 9 p. tn. Mondays and
Thursdays, arrive Ke tey West 3 p. in. Tuesdays and Fridays; arrive. Havana 6* a. m,
Wednesdays and West Saturdays, p.’ Returning leave Havana 12:80 noon Wednesdays and Satur¬
darn, leave Key 7 sn sa ate days,, arrive at Port Tampa 2 p. rn. Th’ursd ays' and
Sunday*.' • further Close connection information ms •de by train 85 lor Key West and Havana,
B. For W. WitENN, Passenger apply Traffic to Man Agent.
a -r.
H, C, MeFADD.EN, Assistant General Passenger Agent.
know ? One has three leaves ami the
other five. Every man of sense knows
.
that, and I don’t see why women
shouldn't.” ,
“Yes, 1 know, ray dear, but. which
kind is the poison kind V"
“Why, yoif goosey, the three-leaf,
of course, or the five-leaf, I forget
which.”
HISS SWEKT KEVIINUP,
“Harry you y”scornfully exclaimed
the young woman. “Xo—not if you
were the last man on. earth ! PH
never No, marry a 300-pounder with :
14 foot and a hand like a split
ham !”
“J. perceive, Mitts Flyppe,” rejoined
the overgrown young man, his entire
frame trembling with indignation,
“that you are not only Wasp-vuisted,
but you can sting i”
And he went away, not wholly
crushed.
F E MINI Jf K M P It O SI AC V.
He—Why is it, Nellie, that I neve*
hear you ash any one if your hut is on
straight, us I so often hear othdr
women do ?
Hhc-.....Why, dear, it’s because Hove
you bo much.
He—But 1 full to see what, that has
got to do with it.
She — Just think how disgraceful
and humiliating 4t would bo to, you
were I to eall any one’s attention to n
hat I’ve worn two years.
N. H.—The following Sunday she
appeared in the very latest creation
of the milliner’s art.
bstkibotj vf. j cstick.
She—Do you think there is any
such thing as retributive justicd upon
i this earth ?
j He—Oh, yes, I’m stare of it. A
j man who once endeavored to kick me
, out of his office for asking him to let
me have his daughter struck the door
j casing, broke his knee cap, and has
I been a cripple ever since. What’s
more, his daughter is getting to be
au ®ld maid,
Cats and Monkeys
All animals, even the wildest, can
he subjected in some wily to I he do¬
minion of man, and be domestlonted
to some extent, Here, for; instance,
are two very curious facts about
cats. Many persons, inclutUuK some
of our great naturalists, Believe that
our English domestic cat is descended
from the Egyptian domestic cat. Yet
nil records go to prove That the cats
of Egypt lived in droves, were cared
for in droves, were fed in droves, and
worshipped in droves. -With the result
that Egyptian cats never got, domes
Heated nr became half,as intelligent
ns ours. The like truth is suggested
from India, where monkeys are, w
shipped. These are' .Viewed to lie
eobae . nuisances, They; are fed ami
they have any amount of liberty, and
what is the consequence? They never
lose their Inna re savagery. The
method of caring for them lure been
wrong. All the devotion and care ex
.
pended on them is practically wasted;
an ^ jf vve treated out cats hi the same
fashion tus the Indians do these moil
j ;eT «. they would become Just n* wild
and undomestieaied.- Qas-li’s Ms ga¬
x j tK ..
Signals for Explorers.
It has been suggested that the use"
electric signalling balLous , wiU.
greatly lessen the dangers of Arche
exploration. One of the great ijiffieut
i | t .s encountered is the. danger or by
coining sepntafed from the. ship. t ev (i n
when making bui «*o , nipnKa,t»vely >hojt •
oxuursions. if .t et ii.miiii,
oenAunatermh .containing j;o.ldrftd nice
trie lights, were attached';!)} ‘dibit 1 '? hi
the ship, and allowed
sufficient altmide. It w m jd ,a.l,n b ^ v
serve fls ft guiding stfu for, tig. _ jJbp * v -
'“"v- »l»> e™"*! **, u *“ r"!'"',”"!;" ’ f",- 1 :,;' ", •
of :l halite attacJldi t', Ih, itillii.il. J.nl
hi the ■»»*“'?'“" 1 •**
■sf
, inr tit>s supplied wiih powerful glas.-e.'
even though eighty or a hundred milcA
away.
j, .....................
The fifteen colonies under l-rnnh
have a population td 5MU5,'L«,