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ADVANCE.
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1
IX A>1 INF, HOW )'OUK HUMOR IS INCLINED, AND WHICH. TIJEgUJdNG PASSION OF YOUR MIND.
44 i-1 4*
VOLUME V.
'ANTON, GEORGIA. THURSDAY $10KN1 NO MAY I SSI.
NUMBER* 81.
THE CHEROKEE ADVANCE.
PUBLISHED EYEKY THURSDAY
—¥Nr—.
HEN. F. I’ERUY. E liter and Proprietor.
Oftcr up-ataira. er>r,
eilie Marta
1F«i( Marirttn anti Gain*■
■near Court Jioure.
Oman- ohoan cheiiokkR countv.
TERMS OF 8UMCMPTI0N.
Pit A nnum in Atlvnni
1i payment is delayed
■e,
..,.*1.01
.... 1.2')
ptn5r*AJvorlj«in5 R ites ostronuTy low,
•o suit Hie linitM.".Xtsa
Legal advertisements inserted and
i li u [ t'd for ns jw*i?ril)0<l By uu act til
the General Assembly.'
Advertisoiueqta will l»o run until for-
Lidden, unions otherwise marked, anil
ch irgod for accordingly. All considered
due niter Hr*! ny-oitioei.
All comitiinirTiitlims InNelidod for pub-'
licit ion must bonr the namo of writer,
.ot ne -ossiry for pnWiCidibti, but a* a
i uimntee of pood faith,
W’i sludl not in any way lip rpmon-Uilo
for tJi'fiJtiluioi^oC t|)nfc-ilijilia'Hi' ' .
No eonunumcatioii will lo admitted
into our_ columns-having for its end#
dofnmati m of private character, or in
any other way ot a scurrilous ipipoi'Uof
pn I die pood
of
hr
All communications, letters of busi-
ness, nr'inc
prompt ot ton
HEN. Fi^F.llHV, (antgn, Ga.
P. O. Drawer 49.
FROM TT1E CRADLE TO TIIK ORA VB.
Thrro Ilia aarowitU'i KioUk'i> knoe.
Amt giilfiercd in her hand,
A little robe of puffs uml loco,
With nu cml'i*oiil(T*fl timid,
t rce her smile, 1 hear her sing
A lew, enroot lnUal-y ;
And oft I scea'Piouplit of joy
i.iidit ig) her bright bins eye ,
It is h rClm for her dear child
To be christen’d In 1
1 here lies across the mother's knco,
And gatlior'd in her hand,
A Ki|ken robe, with puffs of lacs.
Ami tin embroidered band.'
’1 is ulitte, and like n cloud at evo,
’i lint Hosts across the sky.
ilut oli, I lu hr thu luother givo
An oft-repested sigh.
It is a rolio for herileur child,
To be welded in.
TUeic lies across (be mnllior's knee,
And gathered in tier hand,
A roh« of softest wool ; hilt it
Hi a no enihj utdcred hntid.
And on her clictks so wan and pale,
'1 hu mother's kusrs. t s#->,
And li'i-ar her prat, L-dd, gdvc me stienglh I
Oh, givuT’hy strength to mo !
It Isa rube for her dear child.
- - .. » —* d - - ... .
1 <]tl lei's I IiiiSljaiid
Ethel V*no was ft young bcuuty oi
eighteen—ft beauty of the most radiant
Corrosp »mlvu«*c on nil point* eighteen—ft beauty of the most radiant
general impwtfi IwU lot 4ln;n\ hg'#Llomle type, witheyos that soeniod liko
idly to the point. * liquid wells of Liao light, wavy hair of
>o nunications, letters of luisi-
.quyUcinitUuicpa, to rjmyc
iitton. nmstsh-i tult’.n rtaoJto
Professional and Business
Cards.
W. A. & G. I. TtASLEY,
Attorneys at IjO w,
CANTON, GEORGIA.
Will givo prompt a:tcnfciou to all busi
ness intrusted to them. Will pmsticc in
all tlio courts of the county aud in tho
HuRorior Courts of tho Blue Ridge eir-
, cui). v jonS-ly
''4k I). MADDOX.
r*
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
CANTON, GEORGIA
Refers by permission to John Silvoy &
Co., Thos. M. Clivrko Si Co., James It.
Wylie and Gnunling, Spalding A Co., all
of Atlanta, Ga. jaul-’83-ly
GEO. R. BROWN,
ATTRONEY AT LAW,
Will practlco in the Superior Courts
of Cobh, Mil on, Forsyth, Pickens and
Raws in counties, and ity tho Superior
and Justice courts of Cherokee.
Ofllco over Jos. M. McAfee’s store
Special attention given to the collec
tion of claims.
Business respectfully solicited.
[jan3- f 83 ly.]
n. W. NT.WHAN.
SSO. n. ATTAWAY.
NEWMAN & ATTAWAY,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
CANTON, - - - GEORGIA.
Will practice in the Superior Courts
*f Cherokee and adjoining counties.
Prompt attention given to all business
placed in their hands. Office in the
Court House. [jan3-’83-ly ]
P. P. DuPREE,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
CANTON, GEORGIA.
Will practice in. thr Blue Ridge cir
cuit and in Cherokee county. Offic.i in
tnn Court House witli the Ordinary.
Administrations on estates.
ftHTL'o lections a specialty.
7T * r- W
Q ' < <
fiitiN F. FBBHY,
AGI.NT —
FIRE AND LIRE INSURANCE CO.
» Office with Cherokee Advancm.
spun gold, and a complexion liko
freshly-opened oleander. She had n
ueut little fortune in her own riglit, and
she had a very elonr and well-defined
idea of doing what she pleased with it.
Miss Eudocia Eumes woe a middle-
aged second cousin, who hatl more gen
tility tlinu income, and who eked out
tho latter by noting iu tho capacity of
ohaperon and companion to tho unucy
licnuty, giving advice which Ethel never
took, and objeoting on principle to evory
gonflehian whom Ethel fancied.
But one day Miss Vane entered her
relative's presence with very rosy cheeks
and a deep sparkle in her eyes which
Eudocia had never seen there before.
“Miss Eudocia," she said, “I am en
gaged to bo married."
“Are yon ?” , said Miss Eudocia, with a
little gasp, ns if she were swallowing
castor oil.
“To Mr. Harold North."
“My goodness I" cried Miss Eudocia.
“Why, it isn’t three weeks since you
were first introduced lo him.”
“Oh, that's nothing," said saucy
Ethel. “I made up my mind that I
liked him in three days.”
“I think yon are running a great risk,
Ethel,” said Eudocia Eames. “I should
never marry a man that I didn’t know
all about,”
“Is that what has kept yon from mntri-
mony all those yoars ?" said Ethel Vane,
mischievously.
Miss Eames tossed her head, and tho
tips of her cheek-bones and tho end of
her noso became a degree more roseate
than nsnal.
“Well," said she, “of course you know
your own business best; and I ouly hope
you will never live to regret this precipi
tancy."
But Ethel married Harold North in
less than six weeks more.
“I never could reconcile myself to
such a rneli stop,” said Miss Eames.
“Oh, well,” said Ethel, “there seemit,
to be no occasion that you should.”
ing man, with one of those mysteriously
handsomo tapes which inspire all school
girls with Hie hlea that thkre must b*
sdr.ie secret chapter in his life. . But he
made himself very agreeable, and Miss
Eudocia began to relent in her opinion
of him. ' ’
Tho next day she wss beginning an
elaborate piece of worsted work in the
pink-and-silvcr drawing-room, when the
maid knocked at tho door.
“Please, ma’am,” Bnid Thebe, in a
perturbed manner, “she will oomo in '
d|id she won’t send np her card ! And
t\c won’t wait in tho little green rccop-
Ueu-rgem for me to go tip to my mis-
fn-ss f And pleuso, ma’am, here,sbo is.
bn tho stairR now 1"
“Thebe,” said Miss Eames, “what on
oarth do yon mean ?’ r
At tho same minute Ethel North camo
softly in from an opposite door, and
found herself faced by a tall apparition
in block, with a dusty crape Veil, hag
gard oyes, and hnir originally black as a
raven’s wing, but now thickly streaked
with sAver.*
“Ah I” said she, as Ethel looked at
her with surprised bine eyca, “so it’s
you, is it, that have married my bus-
band?”
“Married your husband I"
Ethel could only gasp out tho words
after her iu breathless amnw'ment,
“Yes 1” uttered tho othor woman,
with a chuckle of malioions satisfaction.
“But don’t think that yon are to keep
him, in spite of your blno eyes, snd
yellow hair, aud pretty pink cheeks. I
was pretty once, in the days that arc
past. I have the first right to him, and
I mean to havo him. I’ve followed him
half ovor the world, and I’ve traced him
out at last. Whore is he? I say, where
is ho?”
Ethel looked at Miss Eudocia, and
*11rank behind her liko a frightened
doer.
“He is in the city,” said Miss Endo-
cia, bewildered and hesitating. “Ho
has not returned yet.”
“Then hem I wait until ho does re
turn,” said the woman, seating herself
but it is his fault. He can dress you,
you pitifnl doll-faced thing,” with n jerk
of her bead toward Ethel, “In silks and
jewels, while I am shabby and neglected.
But never mind; we shall see what the
law sayB to this. A man can’t have
two wives. I’ll wait—yes, I’ll wait.”
She laughed derisively as she spoke.
Ethel caught at Miss Endoeia’s hand;
“Oh, come awny 1" she faltered, with
trembling voice and changing color. “I
— I am afraid of that woman.”
And together they took rofuge in tho
library beyond, locking the door to bar
themselves cffootnally from all intru
sion.
“Miss Eudocia,” whispered Ethel, as
pnlo as a ghost, “what does it mean?”
“It means, my poor child, that you
liavo been cluatefl and dooelvcd t”
groaned Miss Eudocia. “Didn’t I tell
3on so? Didn’t I say Jon would livo
to regret your rash precipitancy ? Oh,
Ethel, I never liked that man’s face ! I
always knew that there was a dark mys
tery inWs life.”
“Whitt shall I do? Oh, dear! wha*
can I do?” gasped Ethel; aud Misrf
Eudocia could feel that her hands were
as c^ld ns ice.
‘Riot your things 1” said tho old maid.
“Oh, ^jk’m,’* said fco. ^‘He’s at
^Doctor Fishing's, waitin’ for yon-. Dr’s
been there this long time, and wo
couldn’t thihk where yon was gone. Ho’s
thrown alfthe other wives overboard and
come book to yon. Oh, it’s all right.”
Ethel North looked at Mias Eudocia.
Miss EttdaSia looked at pthel North.
“What jjeeso we hov« been I" cried
Ethel, radfcmtly.
“Qtit dkcumstonces did look rather
suspioioniy 1 ’ said M4t* Eames, blankly.
“I believe you’re sorry yet that you
can’t •gL ** t°id you so,’” laughed
Ethel, as gleeful as a child.
“N*, Imi licit n1 I deaqA Hn ><t Miss
Eudocia, WinHing iiito tears.
And she really and actually nioant iU
(or Miss EmVioia, old maid tliough she
was, had not u bad heart.— Vopulnr
Monthly,
Notes of a Sermon.
T-. NEWMAN',
HOUSE & CARRIAGE PAINTER,
Taper Hanging and Calciaiinlng,
Graining and Glazing.
A. Llj WUH X li V A. I IAN T EttD
Can be found a Warlick’s Bhop.
jj;iu3-83Ty]
J. M. HARDIN.
House, Sign, Carriage
f - —AX'D—
ORNAMENTAL PAINTER,
FRESCO AM) mm ARTIST ALSO.
0:1 ntal 'andGreeian painliii^.
Turin •, ('arm- Lmm:, pajiling in ce-
p'oi and India Ink.
Twenty-five per cent sivtd by apply-
'po-t, i me hcPoroeirUntOibur with other-*.
yiDcrial f urnished- at bottom piiee.i.
S.ili-sfacHon iji-vCn or no char;/ ■< niud.'.
See of rslire-'H J M liAUDlN,
fj»n3-'S3-ly] Canton, Georgia.
the barbed sting of her pretty young
courfin’s words.
“Oh, no; I shall not,” langliod Ethel.
But in spite of this war of words, the
young people had scarcoly settled down
after the honeymoon, before Miss Eames
onmo to visit them, with a fearful nrrtty
of Gqrfitoga trunks, bandbo*cs^ ond par
cels strapped up in brown paper. Ethel
ran to tho gate to welcome her.
“I am so glad you come just now,
dear Mies Eudocia,” said she, brightly.
“The roses aro all in bloom, and Eden
Villa is at its best. Wasn’t it nice of
Harold to engngo it ready furnished for
the season—servants, carriages, horses
and all? And he can go in and out of
the city every day, and I’m working a
pail- of slippers for him on tho sly; and
there’s such a delicious little cascade
down i.u the ravine, and a fernery among
tho rocks, and a little lilac-and-gold
boat on the river—that I can row my
self—hardh* bigger than a scallop sheli.
Do come in, and I’ll ring for tome tea,
and you’ll have time for a nice long nap
before Harold comes home.”
And the bride ied Miss Eudocia
Eames triumphantly into a pretty little
apartment, all paneled rose and silver,
with a white velvet carpet, windows
draped witli musliu and pink ribbons,
and a tiny conservatory opening out of
it.
“And are you happy?” said Miss
Eames, interrogatively.
“Oh, I am the happiest girl in all the
wide world!” said Ethel.
Mr. North came home to dinner,
presently—a dark-browed, corsair-1 ook-
ITIlIno Drop of Negro Wood.
Tho Belma (Ala.) Time» tolls the fol
lowing singular story Mr. Isaac
Frank, n^wdiitc moqf'tvnrlndietqd by tho
Inst dhni Jury lmdcr tho charge of
living in unlawful wedlock with a negro
woman, Aklrs. Mary Ann Frank, wife of
(bo accused, was present; also her
alleged mother, Lucinda Weaver, col
ored. Lncinda was sworn, and put upon
tho witness-stand. Her testimony threw
new Uglit upon tho case and caused a
little nutter of excitement aud surprise
among those present. Bho spoke in a
straightforward manner. Notwithstand
ing Lwoinda has always boon known as
the mott^er of Mary, it turns out that
tho young woman’s parentage is purely
white. Lucinda testified that she was
not the mother of Mrs. Mary Frank and
that Mta^l'rank was given to her when
an infant three days old; that a promi
nent gentleman in South Carolina brought
tho ya«*g tolald and presented it to
Lucinda, requesting that she ratae it a(
her own. Bho stated further that the
•hild was the illegitimate offspring at
an aristocratic woman, and it' was hlft
brother who gnvo the infant to the old
negroes to shield hi# sister’s reputation
and ooneaal her shame. The old uegress
truth of matters very probably never
would hate been uncovered to the world
but for Mary’s marriage to the white
man and tho indictment issued against
him. Mrs. Frank, now grown into
mature woniahiioad, has light, Btraiolit
hair, a fair complexion, and clear, blue
eyes, and doesn’t boar the remotest trace
of African blood. A ntimlier of gentle
men visited her recently, eonveAcu with
lier, and.decided that she was boyopd
doubt a white woman. After Lucinda's
testimony was heard, Bolicttor Pitts
agreed to a verdict of not guilty, And
the happy twain departed in peace.
In the Sniiilan.
“You’ll live to repent it,” persisted
Miss Eames, waxing venomous under T ..o£ m e"homo ^ith mo f Loave him for
ever 1”
“But I lovo him I” wailed Ethel.
“More fool, you 1” cried Miss Eudocia,
fairly losing patience. “Whit! after
ho l&s trifled with yon—deceived Voir—
blighted your whole lifeV Como home
witt me, l say 1 Don’t let kjg^g^t
over the min he has wrought r
But even ns Mias Eudocia pleaded
with the young wife, who sat there pale
and drooping as a broken lily, the blinds
of the open window back of them were
cautiously raised and a rubicund face
looked in.
“Ladies,” said the owner of the rubi
cund fnoe, iu a whisper, "don’t be
EtlarmeJ. There ain’t no ocoasion. But
U she hero?”
“Who ?” exolaimed Miss Eudocia, who
was the first to recover her self-posses
sion,
“Mrs. Nokes ! Escaped from the
Private Lunatic Asylum, three miles
down the river, this evening. Tall lady,
in black. Talks about her husband, as
she thinks is married to another wo
man 1”
“Yes,” cried Ethel, springing to her
feet. “Ob, yes—she is here. She Is in
the other room, ”
And she fell, hysterically laughing
and sobbing, into Miss Endoeia’s arms.
“Mum’s tho word, then,” said the man
with the rubicund countenance, disap
pearing from tlicj wimloqr ns niirnpiJ' au.’y
as lie appeared,
AqJ prffl'yjGy they saw him escorting
the tail lady in black down the carriage
drive, talking to her, as they went, in the
most persuasive manner possible.
The recent Botulan bnttle, in many of
ts lending details, reproduces with curi
ous exactness the great victory of Mlani,
or Meoaunoo, by which Gen. Napier, iu
1843, broke the power of tho hitherto
uuconquerod warriors of Beloocliislan.
Iu both cases tho European troops
assumed the offensive against a much
larger force thau their own, and the
beaten Orientals displayed a stubborn
tenacity seemingly quite at variance
with their usual impulsive temper. The
description of tho Arab mode of fight
ing, “rushing in under the muzzles ol
the guns upon their hands nnd knees
and then slashing right and left,” roads
liko tho story of Mianl over again. Tire
Bolooch swordsmen dashed in under tins
bayonets .and bowed with their short
swords at the limbs of the British sol-
diftw. After the battle 43 men of dtae
English jroffiment were found wonnded
by a slosh across the knee. Tho be
havior of Osman Digna’s Arabs in their
rotreat, "walking uway with arms
folded, as if sauntering through a
bazaar,” is a perfect photograph of that
of the Beloochis at Miani when the
splendid ehargo of the Irish Brigade
had finally turned the scale against
them. “Our troops,” said Napier, “fol
lowed up the retreating enemy, pouring
in volley after volley till they were tired
of slaughtering, but still the stern war
riors of Beloochistan preserved their
wonted swaggering stride and would not
quicken it even though death was at
their heels.” Evidently there are some
“impulsive Orientals” who are not easily
cowed by defeat, whatever some his
torians may say.
At A BE2-TEFIT ENTERTAINMENT ill NeW
Haven, one of the incidents of the
money getting was a mock auction sale of
old maids. There were thirteen of these
spinsters, and the bidding was spirited ;
but the result reflected on tho perspi-
oaoity of the gentlemen who (lid tho
bidding, for after the unmasking, tho
chattle who had commanded tlio fewest
offers, aud was knocked down at the hu
miliating figure of 23 cents, proved to bo
the-handsomest uud wealthiest young
woman of the city.
“Ye slinll receive power, after that the
Holy Ghost is oome upon yon," (Acts,
i., 8) was Dr. Hall’s text Bundsy Bon
ing, Among tlio notable sentences of
tho sermon wero:
“There aro questions whioh it is
wise for ns t* put off, ss tar as an an
swor is concerned.”
“Original power belongs to God, bnt
thcro aro forms of power whioh His
creatures can call into notion.”
“Yon would all agroo that tho minis
ter should preach tho word with nil
Mdncss, bnt are there not some of yon
itiio Hunk your religion is a matter be
tween your Maker and yourself, nnd tho
less yon say aliout it tho bettor ? If you
think this, is a matter of dlvino teaching
I say to yon, No,”
“Tho servants of God aro equnl to
tho burdens laid upon them.”
“If you havo bccu truly brought to
diseiplcHhip you will always lie hungry
for more truth.”
“We Trotestants agree in stigmatizing
the unseriptnrnl opun vperatum teach
ings of Romanists, but J put it to yon if
wo Trotestants are not in danger of fall
ing into an opim operation doctrine iu
onr own lino that is just as mischievous?
You sny yon hear a sermon overy Bun-
day, and I say to yon, what of it?
What havo you gainod ?”
“Real healthy appetite doos not load
a man to turn away from food because
food of the same kind has been served
to him before. What if yon have heard
a Berman of the Same kind before ?”
“Churoh fellowship has boon abused
aud counterfeited. Mon liave even taken
the ministry as a moons of making a liv
ing aud getting on in the world; but is
that an argument in favor of tho right
use of chnroh fellowship ?”
“I wonder if therq hove not been
church members who have taken and
hove been known to tnko downward
steps one after another, and havo gone
to ruin ? Who oan say: My brethren
never once spoke a kindly word of warn,
ing.”
commonly go a little too
~fnrpTi^(nO Mieuon against various
doctrines we, as Trotestants, have been
apt to make too little of the sacra
ments.”
“Most of you have been baptized
You would not rob a fellow man. Do
you rob God of what yon have solemnly
vowed to ponder to Him from day to
day ?”
“No man oan be suro that he is notin
danger of morbid feeling in some dlreo
tion.”
"Divine powor is always ready to lie
put into operation if we will koep the
clianuols ready.”
“You may tako a shoot of paper and
fill it with lines of ciphers, but they
amount to nothing till you put tho ono
at tho beginning. Numbers in a church
aro idle unless tho spirit of God leads
them.”
“The use of great quantities of quack
medicines is proof of widespread disease
or apprehension of evil.”
“Ask yoursolves if yon havo not been
living below yonr privileges.”
THE JOKER’S BUDGET.
•WIIAT WR PINO 1!R TOR IIIUt#»
PAI'KHH TO HMII.R C'VKK.
Tin old ouk nroR.
When thl
bod of the Ohio, Now
no swelling, shall run
dry, O, Maybe In tho dis
tant ages, then tho aelen-
tinta and saura will raok their
brains o'or tlio fossil remains
of the old gum shoo of the
inaid so trne. Tho wooping mat-
drn who so witli love was laden *,
that very daring daughter who wor
shiped Higher Water. Hno did her level
bout to save him from a watery grave. Trace
to his snnl I No more lie'll roam upon the
yellow foam; no more he'll hear the
poi'kins squeal; he’ll know no more of
woo or wral t for llsaven
will all his sorrows heal!
DUTIES OF A DfhEOTOll.
[ am a director in the company,”
said the devil in a newspaper office.
“You don’t say so ?”
“Yes, it’s true."
“What ore (he director’s duties ?"
“To direct wrappers, of course.”—
Merchant 'JVavaUcr,
Bel eg a Bey.
There is a great comfort to bo a boy
iu the amount of work lie can get rid of
doing. It is sometimes astonishing how
slow he can go ou an orrand; perhaps
he couldn’t explain himself why, when
lie is sent to the neighbors’ for yeast, he
stops to stone the frogs. Ho is not ex
actly cruel, but he wants to sco if he
can’t hit ’em. It is a curious fact about
boys, that two wiH hea great deal alower
abont doing nnylhing than one. Boys
have a power of helping each other do
nothing. But say what yon will abont
the general' usefulness of boys, a farm
without a boy would very soon come to
grief. He is always in demand. In the
fii st place, be is to do all tho errands, go
to tho store, post office, and carry all
sorts of messages. Ho would liko to
have as many legs as a wheel has spokes,
and rotate in about the same way. This
he sometimes tries to do, and people who
have seen him “turning cartwheels’’
ajoug the side of the road have supposed
he was amusing himself aud biding his
time. He was only trying to invent a
new mode of locomotion, so that he
qould economize legs, and do his errands
witli greater dispatch. Leapfrog is one
of the methods of getting over the
ground quickly. He has a natural gen
ius for combining pleasure with business.
—Charles Dudley Warner.
A rooNO Indiana woman was “fright-
oned into convulsions by going into a
dimly lighted room which she thought
unoccupied and there seeing a young man
of tho family throwing bis arms wildly
al .out in the. effort to put on his nver-
coftt.” Tim contortions o( the average
Indiana man while putting on a coat
would Irighton a railroad train off onto
i the first switch it could find.
A UTTTiB INTERVIEW.
Reporter— 1 “I suppose you. feel pratty
bod otor tlm failure ol your Laeker reso
lution to reach the Reichstag?”,
Ochiltree—“Well, I don’t mind that
so muob, but thorn is one thing that
makes mo sorry I introduced it."
Reporter—“What is‘that?”
Oohiltroo—“It has given Bismarck So
much prominonoe.”
If nu oonno no soteino better.
At n Lake Erie pleasure resort lost
summer, a certain small party oi young
ladies wero ont for a sail. The yacht
was managed by a handsome young
boatman, who unconsciously made a
mash ou the jolly girls.
“Bhnll I hug the shore?’’ asked the
sailor.
“Well—yes—if that’s the beat you
can do,’.’ was tho reply of ono of the
girls.—7Vie Jfooalc.r.
TOOK CARE OF THE HOIUH.
Passenger— How long have yon been
employed on tho street-cars ?
Driver—Fifteen year—barrin' whin I
was sick.
Passenger—Yon mnst be a great favor
ite with the company ?
Driver— Hal ha I ha 1 — D’ye see
that owld grgy mare I’m dhrivin’?
Well, we both fell sick together at wanst
Inst winter. They sint fnr a dootber for
tho horse, and they sint me mo resigna
tion.
I
THE TRUE MEANING.
“Will yon grant me a kiss?" said
General Bherman to a very pretty young
Indy in Bt. Louis.
“No,” was tho blushing reply.
“Ah, ‘no’ means ‘yes’,” ssid the Gen
eral, with mnoh manner, and he helped
liimsclf to a couple of kisses.
A few moments Istor he was asked it
he was a candidate lor the Presidency,
and lie blusliingly answered “No,”—
Kve.niny Call.
The 10m Bitrnsn reoimrnt has been
stationed at Halifax for some time.
Recently it was ordered to Malta.
Numerous desertions took plane, the
men fearing that they would be sent to
Egypt for actlvo service.
Henry James, who is said to bo a mart
of taste, says that the most beantlfnl
woman he ever saw is the cashier in a
Tovcnco restaurant. She is large, quiet,
and has the dignity of a Roman em
press. He also declares admiration for
t|e washerwomen iu tho Traatevere.
too strict, i »
In Germany, tho police' regulations
ore very strict, and any violation of them
is promptly punished. Tho people have
a holy terror of the law. Two gentle
men happened to meet in Berlin, and
tho following conversation took place :
“Have you heard the dreadful news
abont Miller?”
“No, what is it?”
“Ho was in a boat in the river. He
fell overboard, and was drowned. The'
water was too deep.”
“Didn't he know how to swim f ’
* ‘Swim ! Don’t yoa know that all per
sons arc forbidden by the police tp swim
in the river ?”—Texan Siftings,
WET ONE CANNOT LOVE A TOMATO.
The feminine mind early attains to the
consideration oi the ethics of the affec
lions. In a city school the other day
the class in English grammar was dis
cussing the difference between tho
words “liko” and “love.” “Now,” said
tho teacher, “wc can liko a tomato, but
is it proper to say wo can love a toma
to?” “No, it is not,” said a fresh young
miss; “one cannot love a tomato,”
“Why not?” inquired the teacher. “Bo->
cause, you know, you cannot—yon can't
—well, you can’t hug a tomato.”