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TEE CHEEOKEE ADVANCE.
* ■ ■ *
EXAMINE HOW YOUR HUMOR 18 INCLINED, AND WHICH THE RULING PASSION OF YOUR MIND.”
- - 3
\ OLUME VI.
CANTON, GEORGIA, FRIDAY, MOURNING, MARCH 6, 1885. *
NUMBER If).
fi'IVRN AND TAKEN.
B* lOBS QBESSI.EAI WHITTIKH.
Smoothing soft thn nestling head
Of ft maiden fancy-led,
Tims the grave-eyed woman paid :
“Hichcst gifts are those we make,
Dearer than the love we take
That we pivo for lovo's own nak&
“Well I know tho heart’s unrest;
Mine has been the common quest
To bo loved and therefore blest.
•‘Favors undeserved wiq-o mine;
At my feet ai on a shrine
Love has lai i its gifts divine.
“Sweet tho offerings seemed, and yet
With their sweetness came regret,
And a soneo of unpaid debt.
"Heat t of mine unsatisfied
Was it vanity or pride
That a deeper joy denied?
“Hands that ope but to receive
Empty close; they only live
Uiohl.v who can richly give.
“Still,” sho sighed, with moistening oyes,
“Love is s\v et in any guise;
But its best is Bacrilh o !
“Ho who, giving, doos not crave
I.ik' st is to Him who gave
Life itself the loved to bhvo.
“Love that self-forgetful gives
Kowb snipi iso of ripened sheaves,
Late or soon its own receives.”
—Independent.
LIFE OF A COUNTRY PARSON
TIIU It ICV. tilt, lilt *\YF(HCI>>8 DUN A-
TlON PAIITY.
Tim Most Siirrcssrnl lleltl In Vcnra, lint It
Iniled Him mid It la Wile—Seme Very
Curious Presents,
Peppertown, Doc. 20.—The near ap
proach of Christmas calls to mind the
curious experience iti this villuge on
Christinas Eve one year ago of tho late
Rev. Eleanor Crawford, Many of the
tacts concerning this experience are pub
lio property, wliilc others, which were
t la to the writer by ; the Rev. Mr. Craw
ford’s widow, just previous to her death,
Oct. 25 last, are now made known lor
t?i«t time. The siugle ohurch io
ttfis village waa tho ilrst niid only charge
Mr. Crawford ever had. He entered
the ministry when nearly 40 yeara old,
after an unsuccessful business career.
His, inexperience was impressed upon
him when Trustees Lemuel Carter,
Johnson Higbee and Amos Jackson
called upon him in his dingy homo in
West Twentieth street, New York, and
engaged him. “We will give you $550
a year and a donation,” said Trustee
Iligbeo, ‘.‘and if you make a go of
preaching and wo like you, why maybe
we will give you more uoxt year.”
The Kov. Mr. Crawford was anxious
to enter upon the work ho had olioseu
and accepted the offer. lie was kindly
and Rood, and thought that ho and bis
cheery English wife could live with their
three children on that salary. They
knew nothiug of country life, and Mr.
Crawford’s idea of a donation extended
so far only that he knew what the word
meant, in tho abstract.
They came here in June, 1883, and
gradually grew into the favor and good
will of tho 1,200 people who make the
village their home. They lived, of
course, in tho parsonage, which is con
sidered a very. • oomfortable house.
There is uo well and no cistern. Drink
ing water has to bo carried from a well
iii the yaid of Joo Long, the saloon
keeper, who lives next door, and rain
water is caught in tubs and barrels set
under the ends of the wooden eaves
troughs. The woodshed is in the rear
ot tho parsonage some ten feet, and
there is no barn. Mr. Crawford kept
neither a horse nor cow and needed no
barn. Accustomed as they bad been to
oity conveniences, they found the work
inseparable from housekeeping very
hard, but they bore that, as they did
'most troubles, patiently and without
murmuring.
11 was at the November meeting of the
I’, nateos that tlm question of the doua-
1. ' came up,,and ChristnquH Eve was se-
leete.il as the time. After the evening
service the next. Sunday, Trustee C.irter
took the Pastor one side and told him
about the donation.
“You’ve done pretty well, consider
ing,” said Tru-tee Carter, as he worked
his arms into his heavy overcoat and
drew it up over his shoulders, ‘ ‘and we
are going to give you a first-class dona
tion party.”
“Yes, said the Pastor, tentatively.
Mr. Crawford liked his Trustees, but
,hoy were different from the men he had
tern aceu-tomed to, and there was
never the good-fellowship between them
and the minister that existed between
tne Trustees themselves and their fellow-
members in the church.
“I don’t suppose,” continued Trustee
C rtor, “that you ever saw-a donation ?”
“L never did,”said Air. Crawford, with
a liitle laugh.
“And don’t know anything about how
they’re run ?”
“No, not much,” answered tho minis
ter. (lushing a little and lookiug as if he
thought he ought to know just what a
donation party was.
“Oh, well, you’ll know all about
those things when you've been longer in
tho business,” said Trustee Carter, good-
uaturedly. “Yon see, ministers have to
live like everybody else, though the
Bible docs say ‘Tako no thought for
your meat.’ If a minister doesn’t have
things he has got to buy thorn like other
folks. N w, wo mostly raise r.U ncits of
stuff, you know, and ouoo a year we givo
t. our minister a Lot of vegetables and
things of that sort that he’d have to buy
otherwise. It's just the same as so
much more salary, only it’s easier for ns
and just as good for him.”
“Why, I should think that was an ex-
cellont plan,” said Air. Crawford, with a
good deal of interest. “It must—”
“Yes, it’s a tip-tap plan,” said the
Trustee. “You soo, we’ll all come to
your house in the evening—it will bo
Christmas Eve this year—and we’il
bring this stuff and loavo it und also
some (looked victuals, and havo a supper
and a first-rate time. The woruau folks
will drop in iu tho afternoon nud briu*
things that they make themselves, and
wo men folks will drop aroutul to sup
per. ”
“Eleazer told mo about tho donation
Alien lio came home,” said Airs. Craw
ford, one day not long before she died,
“and I said it was just as they did iu
Bib’o times, when thoy set apart a por
tion of the fruit of their toil as a thnnk
offeriug, only I couldn’t sec how so
many people were going to got into our
little house.”
There was capital sleighing the wee)
before Christmas, but tho minister am.
his wife staid indoors setting their house
in order for the donation. They Were a
little nervous whfiu tho day came and
wished it was over. It was nearly 3
o’clock when a big sleigh drew up in
front of the parsonage and Widow
Selina Archibald climbed out. Her
hived man dropped the roins and fol
lowed hor up to tlio door, staggering un
der th«5 weight vf a *rs*f. jar. ,
The minister opened the door and
welcomed Airs. Archibald, while the
hired mau stepped inside and put the
big jar on the floor.
"I’vo brought you some quince pre
serves,” said Airs. Archibald to Mrs.
Crawford. “They’ve just begun to
turn, but if yon heat them over they'll
bo all right again.”
“Thank yon,” said the minister’s wife
willi ns much warmth as she could mus
ter under the reflection that neither she
nor any member of hor family could
tolerate quinoes.
Tho two ladies wont through into the
parlor and the minister tugged and
11■ i!J«'il tho great jar through into the
panfry and down the cellar stairs. Just
then Trustee Jackson drove up with his
wife and six great pumpkins. “Them’s
awful good pumpkius,” said tho Trus
tee, n3 he set tho golden globes on the
steps and drove away, saying he had got
to go down to tho mill nud would be
back by and by. The minister carried
the pumpkins down into tho cellar and
got back in time to meet Mr. Higgins,
the blacksmith, who brought his wife
and a set of very heavy tongs, shovel and
poker, whioh ho assured the minister he
bad hammered out himself. Airs. Hig
gins had a tin pau full of caraway-seed
cookies, a paper bag full of pickles and
a frosted cake. She also had her two
children, one of whom she told Airs.
Crawford was probably coming down
witli the measles. Tho other child nar
rowly escaped falling down the cellar
stops, a disaster -whioh Mrs. Crawford
judged from Airs. Higgins’s manner she
would have been held responsible for.
Airs. Simmon’s, tho grocer’s wife, ar
riv'd next, carrying a 10-pound package
of brown sugar, the sweetening power of
which her husband had said was unusu
ally great. She had also worked a tidy
for Airs. Crawford’s rocking chair and
was quite surprised to find out that Airs.
Crawford had. some tidies already. Mr,
Wiuter, the hardware merchant, walked
over with his wife who had brought
some loaves of fresh bread and another
frosted cake. Air. Wiuter himself hod a
large package or tenpeuny nails and a
jackknife with a gimlet and button hook
attached. Trustee Higbee unloaded five
rftora pumpkins which the minister car
ried down to the cellar. One of them
rolled against a dry goods box upon
which the jar of quince preserves were
standing. The jar slid off and rolled
over the stones, and most of the pre
serves ran out on the ground. Deacon
Wiley came in next with some celery,
which ho told the minister he had un
derstood was excellent for building np
the nervous system. Mrs. Wiley had a
brace of chickens.already cooked, which
.she said would do for the supper. Dea
con Hiram Blodgett brought a bushel of
Spitzenberg apples, and his eldest son,
a laid of 18, had a bushel of black wal
nuts. Mrs. Blodgett had some raised
biscuits and a pan of seed cakes. Mrs.
Alartba Richards brought n couple of flat
irons which were too heavy, she said, for
her uso, and her daughter hod made a
handsome holder for taking the irons off
the stove when they were hot. Mrs’
Richards said her brother-in-law Alichael
would briug some pumpkins and another
squash or Iwo, and just thou Air. Rich
ards arrived. When Mr. Crawford car
ried tho squash down to the oellar he
slipped upon the spilled preserves, and
in falling slightly spraiued his wrist.
Air. Richards's wife had embroidered a
pair of siippers for the minister, which
wore found to be too small. Her dnngli-
; r had mrido a chintz-covorod chair
usbion, stuffed with corn husks, aud
tliis was too large for any ohair iu tho
house.
Tho druggist’s wife hod an elootrio
belt for the minister, which her hus
band warranted to cure any liver trou
ble known. Other ladies Drought va
rious good things for the supper, and
the gentlemen, when thoy arrived, had
a!« a great varioty of gifts. Among
tin m was a horsewhip, a sawbuok, a
cord oi wood, whioh was dumped out in
the street for tho minister to carry to tho
woodshed; a lot. of seed oorn tied to-
, thor by the husks, a peok of dried ap-
pi, . a (1 iii which was recommended ns
. ,.,g unequal d for thrashing out beans,
two liomo-made Dootjaoks, a curry comb
and brush, a “pouuding barrel” for
washing clothes and a pouuder, a gallon
of soft soap, and some more pumpkins.
Some of the ladies brought strips of rag
carpet, some of whioh were more or less
worn, aud one of them had a dozen balls
of carpet rags and some live pounds of
warp. There were also some newspa
per i with scolloped edges, which wore
suitable for pantry shelves.
But the most striking gift of all wns
that of Deacon Thomas Jeffers. It was
after dark when tho Deacon arrived ami
♦ lie house was crowded. Air. Crawford
heard him shouting out in the street
atid went out bareheaded. Tbe Deacon
was bolding the reins to his team with
one hand and a rope attached to a cow
with tbio other. ./i . t
*'There, Elder,” said the Deacon,
“there’s a oow I brought you. Hho’s
au awful good cow; been iu our family
more than 20 years. AIv father pave
her to me when I was married. She’s
farrow anil dou’t give any milk, but
sho's an awful good cow."
“I’m very much obliged, I’m sure,
Denoon,” snid Mr. Crawford. Then he
took tho rope and, wrnling through the
snow, led the oow around to the wood
shed and tied her up there. The Pastor
hardly know what to do with the oow,
whioh had but one born and seemed un
commonly vicious for ono of her age and
good bringing up. The supper was a
great success. Thoro were several little
articles such as eggs and spices wanting
among the gifts, but these Airs. Craw
ford supplied from hor own storo. After
supper the Spitzenberg apples wore
oaten and so were the black walnuts.
The Pastor and his wife were very tired
when their party was over, and wont
directly to bed. When they arose in
the morning, they found their dry wood
i oi all been burned up the night before
in an effort to keep the bouse warm.
now had fallen and aftor the wood
which lay in the street had been cut up
by tho minister, it was found difficult to
make it burn. The cow manifested a
desire for something to eat by frequent
appalling sonnds, and the minister, after
trying her with the dried apples which
Hhe rejected, meanwhile endeavoring to
hook him with her one horn, gave her a
oouple of the t wenty-odd pumpkins in the
cellar. Every article of cooked food in
the house was gone, and the stores were
closed. Tho brown sugar still remained,
and there were tho winter squashes and
all the articles which could not be eaten.
Mrs. Crawford cooked some of the
squash, and with a few of the raised
biscuits which bad been overcooked,
they made r» breakfast. The Pastor
preached a very good Christmas sermon,
although somewhat hoarse. After the
sermon he was told by a number of per
sons that the donation was considered
the most successful held in years.
. hree months later there was another
fathering at the parsonage. The Rev.
Eleazer Crawford w as dead.
“Can.'lit cold some time during the
,' inter and never got over it,” said
Trustee Higbee. “Consumption, I
guess. ”
“I don’t think I was ever strong
- ..ough for a country minister’s wife,”
aid Mrs. Crawford, a day or two before
die died. “Why, do you know, that
donation party last Christmas tired
ITe zer and me completely ont.”—N. Y.
Times.
“How can we utilize tin scraps?”
asks an exchange. If you have come
lown to taking tin scraps in payment
: r subscriptions, yon had better buy a
goat.
THE IJME-RILN CLUB.
A Fm- Wtrdi I'rmn the I’rrmldfMit nt Hi*
Kr.il ol Hi* Yrnr.
THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT.
"My Irens,” snid Brother Gardner, as
he stood up in a new swallow-tailed coat
and exhibited a shirt front over which n
Chinese washerman had struggled for
abont-two days, “do olo y’nr am fadin’
fast away an’ a few mo’ days will sco do
las’ of 1884. While we stall’ heah iu do
red blush of health, some of our number
liov bin tooken away wid cholera mor
bus,.failin’ off do wood-shod, an’ varus
odot vindictive diseases. Wo bos much
to tie thankful fur. Givoadam Jones
baa lost most of his furnioher on a chat
tel mortgage held by a whito man, but
it might kov bin wnss. Sposein’ ho bad
lost de wifo who wery nearly supports de
hull farn’ly by wasliin’ an’ makin’ rug
carpets I Whalebone Howker walked
out wid his wife when do poach trees
bloomed, an’ do .Tunc breezes sighed
around deir ears. Whar’am she now?
lie am heali wid uh to-night, but
months ago she scooted wid a man who
lias a complcxun do color of a new boot
leg. It might liov bin wnss. Hhe might
hov sold de furnioher au’ coaxed away
hiB fo’ dogs.
“Las’ April Judgo Cadaver had $50
iu cash iu do bank, au’ u homo aroun’
whioh de robins an’ blue-birds sung
deir little souls away. Wliar’ am ho
now? A buck-saw which belonged to a
white man was foun’ in his yard ono
motnin’, an’ it took all his money to
satisfy de Judgo dat he was an innooout
man. Do landlord put in a claim fur
three months’ back rout, au! do robins
an’ blue birds an’ Judgo bad to move
into a cabin wid 15)0 air-holes in de roof.
But it might liov bin wuss. Homo of do
chil’en might hev died, or do Judge bin
bit by a mad dog, or a comet hov fallen
an’ crushed de house au’ farn’ly.
“Let us not only bo thankful fur what
we hov, but thankful Home mo’ dat it atn
as good oh it ar’. While wo might all
lie better off, wo could all be mopped
aroun’ an’ stepped ou, au’ made to feel
dat life was an ole pastur’ full o’ this-
taUes 'o’ feet high. Wo will now addresH
. to de> exigencies of de occa-
I Imo!"—Detroit farce Press.
A Scandalous Abuse.
f TTH rRINTINO OF UNDELIVERED RrEEOUBS
AM CARRIED ON IN WASHINGTON.
[From tho Ne w York nornld. ]
. The resolution offered by Mr. Vest in
the U. H. Senate to abolish tho praotioe
of printing in tho Congressional Record
speeches never delivered in Congress is
nimed at an abuse which already
amounts to a publio scandal, and is
steadily growing worse. By figures
prepared by the Publio Printor it ap
pears that during the last four Con
gresses nearly six hundred speeches
have been published iu tho Record as a
part of the debates and proceedings of
Congress, but not one of them was ever
heard in that body. These flfirnres show
the extent to whioh the privilege of
"leave to print” is abused iu tlio House
alone. They do not inolude tho printed
but undelivered speeches of Benators.
Nor do they show the flagrant char
acter of tho abuse. Alost of the speeches
are a bulky mass of undigested stuff
which nobody will ever attempt to read,
and scarcely any of them are worth
printing in any shapo. Their appear
ance in the Congressional Record sub
jects the government to unwarranted ex
pense, brands with a lie the official pub
lication of Congress and makes it impos
sible for the jieople to know what has
actually been said and done by their
representatives in the national legisla
ture. Whether tho members of that
body will-have tho decency to reform an
evil of which they themselves are tho
iiuthors remains to be seen. But that the
country will heartily second the motion
made by Honator Vest cannot be
doubted.
Tho British Navy.
STRAY ODDS AND ENDS.
A Few Flaiirr* About II from nn Arrlilter*
turul Point •( View.
The entire mass of tho now concrete
beneath tho old foundations is 120 foot
0 inches square, 13 foot 0 inches in
depth, making a total depth of 30 feet
10 indies, and extends 18 foot within
the outer edgo of tho old foundation,
and 23 feet 3 inches without this same
line. Tho mass contains 7,037 onbio
yards of Portland cement, concrete, of a
mixture by volumo of ono part cement,
two parts sand, three parts pebble, and
four parts broken stone. This oonercte
possessed a orusliiiig strength, when
seven and one-half months old, pf 15F
tons per square foot.
The entire work of underpinning was
accomplished without causing tho
slightest crack or tho least opouing iu
nny joint of that portion of the mon
ument already described. Tlio area of
tlio original rubble foundation wigi 0,400
square feet, to which was added 10,002
square feet of concrete, a snrfaoo two
and one-half times as great, and as tho
monument, as now completed, weighs
80,470 tons, this will givo a normal pres
sure on tlio bed of the foundation of
more tlmu 3J tons to tlio square foot,
which will be iuorenHod to a maximum
pressure under tlio action of tlio wind.
The shaft, which is 555 foot high, lias a
base of 55 feet; it is therefore ton
diameters high, with an entasis of ono
foot in every thirty-four in height. It
iH fito id.with white, largo-orystal marblo,
and’ 1 backed with bine gfanito; but ns
the walls iuorease in height, the proper-
tioiF of granite diminishes, and at tho
level of 452 feet the backing disappears,
and the walls from that level to tlio top
are entirely of marblo. The settlement
of the structures varies at each corner,
but the average is 1.7 inches.
The interior of the monument consists
of an iron frame, in two parts, ono of
which carries tlio stairs and landing,
tho other tho elevator machinery; as
tho work progressed, this was utilized
for lifting the stones.
A New Story About Charlie Ross.
The British Admiralty are going to
build during the forthcoming year four
first class ironclads, two torpedo rams of
3,000 tons each, ten scouts of 1,400 or
1,500 tons, thirty first class torpedo
boats and five belted cruisers. These
latter—a new class of ship—will have
armor belts of ten inches of steel with
which their vitals will be protected.
They will have a displacement of 5,000
tons, and tho weight of their armor will
be 1,000 tons. Their water-line will bo
protected by side armor from end toend.
Each will be armed with torpedoes and
some of her guns will bo fired from a
protected house. The ship itself will
also be capable of being directed as a
ram. Each will carry two oighteen-tou
guns and twelve four-tou guns aud her
i speed will be seventeen knots. With
I these additions to her navy, England
I still expects to hold her own against the
I other Naval Powers. The cost of the
' new vessels will be £3,100,000.
• A di»paieh front IDUimore,, Mi}., says:
Mrs. Hhulton, a yopng lady of good so
cial standing, reoen'tly published a letter
iu which she stated that while searching
for a child for adoption she met a woman
giving tho name of Airs. Alaggie Hall,
who had a beautiful child about ten
months of age, which she declared was
her own. The woman hail also a photo
graph of Charlie R ms. A correspondent
called, and Airs. BhuUoli said:
“Ever since I was sixteen years of ago
I have lmd a desire to have children
about me. Home time ago I answered
an advertisement of a mother who want
ed some ono to adopt hor baby. I an
swered tlio notiop,,aud Airs. Maggie
I fall called at my houso with the. child.
Atja glance I could see that the rough-
faced woman was not the motfipr of tlio
pretty child, aud I told her so. Hhe de
nied my story aud said I was mistaken.
I felt satisfied that tho child was stolen,
and said that I would not tako tho child
until she brought prqpfs of tho child a
parentage. After I said that she showed
me a picture of a little boy, about four
years of age, who, pho said, was the
missing Charlie R »ss. Aftor that I was
certain that tho child was stolen, and I
then published tho letter.” Tlio woman
whom Airs. Hhulton speaks of us Airs.
Hall, cannot be found! It is thought
that, a company travel about stealing
children in one city, aud dispose of them
at tho next place they stop.
lift Crew in Two States.
“Are you a native of the Htate ?” asked
the Judgo of tho United Htates Court,
addressing a fat man who had been sum
moned to testify in a case o , illicit dis
tilling.
“Alostly, Jcdge.”
“I mean were you bom in this
btate?”
“I understand. I wa’n’t born here,
but I am mighty nigh a native.”
“Came here when yon were quite
young, I suppose?”
“No, sir, ain’t been here but about
ten year.”
“How old are you?”'
“Fifty.”
“Then how is it that you are very
nearly a native of the Htate?”
“Well, when I come here I only
weighed about a hundred pounds. Now
J weigh two forty, no you see one hun
dred and forty pounds of me are native
while only ono hundred pounds comes
iium Missoury."—Arkunsuw Traveler,
Poor Bom—A London Policeman
arrested some lads the other day for
stone-throwing aud other disorderly acts.
Among those arrested were a few whom
the judge declared to he “young gentle
men,” and the over zealous policeman
tvaB sharply reprimanded for arresting
them. He was told that he ought to
A HATCH or .ilIKKS FHO.W ‘I’HR IIU-
AIOUOI'M CUMMINS OF TIIF. PAPKKM.
A HI* Hhopp-llow It wni Kronoiiin'cH-JHitt
rnmillitr with iho Nhimcs—Tho VUlitor’v
Itiiho—Tlio Wedding (■lll*« JKUfe
TIIK WRDDINO (1IFT3.
Pond Father—“Heo hero, my daugh
ter, this will nover do. You must not
invite those young hub os to your wed
ding.”
Daughter—“And why not, pa? They
are particular friends of mine. There
onn certainly be no objection to them
socially. Their father is a bank pres
ident.”
“Exnotly so, my child, and that’s just
why they must not come, nis bank is
tlio only ono I have nn aooount with,
nud they might tell their father about
that $100,000 check whjch 1 am to give
yon to display among' your wedding
presents.”
“But suppose thoy do 1 , pa?”
"Can’t yon sco? He knows I never
had $5U0 there at. ono time iu my life.”
—PhiladdiMa Call.
nSI'AUTCB
They were luiu hlnu, ono day.
In ft hnnilsome cafe,
And she Imp))' le d to say,
Am she noticed tlio way
I list lie and ies-orcain were In unity,
"Cun you out Ico-crmin with Impunity?”
And ho nmdii tho reply,
With nwrinli of tho cyo,
“No, but I cun with a spoon.”
Itiit her triumph came Moon)
Ah thoy left tho Mnloon,
fie nave hor a nood opportunity)
“And now ReaMo, dear,
As tho weather ih clear,
Can you tiik* a walk with Impunity P
Her Hitllle whh Hi hrlxht US tlui lliooil,
And dolieioiialv nhy
Clime tlio mocking leply,
“No, hill 1 can with a spoon,”
liis.N Wood Davis.
DIDN'T TJNPKHHTAND,
On au Arkansas railway train, a pas
senger culls the conductor and Hays;
‘beeins to tako some time." “Yes,
they are rather slow to-night,” “Why
don’t ymt burn ooal so you wouldn’t have
to stop and wood up?” “Wo do burn
coal.” ‘•Then what are you stopping
here for?” “Oh, I didu’t understand
you when you said it took ’em some
"time. We are waiting for the train rob
bers to blow open tho express safe.
Don’t ho iii a hurry, they'll bo through
pretty soon. All, here thoy come now.
Better hold up your bauds, I reckon.”—
Arkansaw Traveler.
na was. a siieef.
An Austin Bundaj’-sohool teaoher en
deavored to muko his pupils under
stand the parable abont the good shop-,
herd, lio Huid :
“Now, little ohildren, supposo you
were all little sheep, whut would 1
be ?”
lie expected them to say that he
would bo the good shepherd, but much
,o his disgust ono of them replied :
“If we were little sheep you would bo
a big sheep,” whereupon tho tonchei
looked very sheepish, indeed. Ho did
not want to be looked upon an a big
sheep—Siftings.
TilK EDITOR •» wtuniib
“Alot with au accident ?” said a sub
scriber who was two or three years in
arrears, us he entered tho sanctum of a
rural editor. “I see your face is hrnised
and you have got a black eye.” “Well,"
said tlio editor, with a sigh, os he arose
and begun to *roll up his sleeves, “de
linquent subscribers must bo made to
pay up somehow, but I sometimes oome
out second best, as you seo." “Hal"
laughed the visitor as be took out his
wal'et, “I just dropped in to pay
my bill.” And tho editor chuckled
softly to himself aftor the visitor’s de
parture: “Life itf'fuil of.nom[»ensations.
Falling over that wdod-bftx was a bless
ing to me.”—DosUM Courier.
NOT TO I)B MADE KNOWN.
Young Husband (complainiugly) — I
wish wo could find a oook who can
make pumpkin pic such as my mother
used to make.
Fashionable Young Wife (with sur
prise)—Did your mother go into the
kitchen and make pie?
Young Husband—Yes, and mighty
good pie it was, too.
Fashionable Young Wife—Well, I
hope you won’t say anything about it
in the presenoo of the servants.
ONE WAY TO REMEDY IT.
“My friends,” went on the tempor-
auce lecturer, “do you realize when
spending your money for whisky how
little original value you get for it? Do
you kngw that you pay ten or fifteen
cents tor what costs tho producer less
than one-sixth of a cent ?”
A look of horror swept over the faces
of the audience.
“Now, ’he went on excitedly, “I ask
you as sella ble and responsible beings,
as men upon whom ' the support of
wives and little children depends, what
ought to be done ?” .
“The tax ought to be abolished,” was
ttie indignant cry.