Newspaper Page Text
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THE SUNNY SOUTH
Frank stanton’s column.
A Harvest Jingle.
Fodder in de shock now,
Cotton in de gin;
Solid as a rock now—
Money cornin’ in!
O Mister ’Possum, up the sweetgum tree.
You lookin’ mighty purty, en yon smilin’
right at' me!
Supper on de griddle,
Preacher savin’ grace;
Feller wid a fiddle
A-takin’er his place!
O Mister ’Possum, up the sweetgum tree,
\ ou lookin’ mighty purty, en you smilin’
right at me!
A Doubtful Patient.
lie ain’t appearin’ hearty—
Ain’t feelin’ as before:
He’s going to bolt the party,
Or the door!
Door!
Door!
He’s going ter bolt the party,
Or the door!
He ain’t a-eatin’hearty,
An’ you never hear him snore;
O, I’m feared he’ll bolt the party,
Or the door!
Door!
Door!
I’m feared he’ll bolt the party,
Or the door!
Theory and Practice.
The light of the world, my dear, is Love,
Hut alas! for the time—alas!
When Love builds a cot
In a beautiful spot,
He’s got to arrange for the gas—alas!
lie’s got to arrange for the gas!
The bread of the world, my dear, is Love,
Jlut alas! for this practical hour!
When Love has a cot
Near a grocery spot,
He’s got to arrange for the flour—
( That’s sour!)
For the sodary self-raising flour!
In September.
Keen hard on us—this summer time—on folks as well
as stock;
The very fodder in the fields is feelin’of the shock:
But we remember—in September, when the “bead” is on
the corn—
An’likewise on the squirrel, an’you hear the hunter’s
horn—
You’ll be happy—that you will!
In the valley—on the hill;
Thar’ll he pleasure to yer credit when you settle up the
bill.
The sun—lie’s been a-scorchin’ o’ the mountain an’the
plain.
An’ the craps—they got so thirsty that they almost
died for rain!
But remember—in September, when the craps air
gatherin’ in,
I hat the candy-pullin’s cornin’ an’ the dancin’ days
begin!
You’ll be happy—that you will!
In the valley—on the hill;
Thar’Il be pleasure to yer credit when you settle up the
billl
Before and After.
To grind the country’s axes
If elected;
To Cat down all the taxes,
If elected;
'To make each man that votes
K cti with twenty-dollar notes—
Silk beavers—broadcloth coats,
I f elected!
Hut oh, the sudden change
W hen he’s elected!
So distant, shy, and strange
When he’s elected.
The voters cease to shout
And in sorrow hang about,
And the police show ’em out
When he’s elected!
The Things that Hurt.
W e’ve nothing to s ty ’gain-t September—
For the summer was surely the worst;
Hut the thing that will bother
One chap and another *
Is this: It's September the first!
His Leading Questions.
How much money do you make?
Huh!
W hen’s your business going to break ?
Huh!
'Vert; you never in the war?
What you get your salary for?
W hen you’re sleeping, do you snore?
Huh!
Li and the Four Hundred.
“How old is that lady?”
“Is she married?”
“How much taniily?”
“She is very beautiful. What did it cost her?
“What salary does her husband receive?”
“When is his pay-day?”
“Does he gamble?”
“Does he own or rent his house?”
“I observe that he is bowlegged. What is the cause
of it?”
Billville on Li.
It is probable that Li Hung Chang will visit Billville,
but if he asks the head of our family her age, Lord help
him! r
W e don’t know that we shall be in a position to wel-
co , m ®^ i to Billville, for, having lost our ticket, the lo
cal Chinaman still retains our shirt.
Ten to one if Li attends a lynching bee in Billville, he
will ask the master of ceremonies, “Who pays for the
rope?” J
. t)ne thing is certain, if Li drinks moonshine liquor,
it won’t do to ask a fellow where he made it.
If he asks the circulation of the Banner, we shall tell
him we don’t swear.
He is perfectly welcome to know just how much sal
ary we don’t get.
And we can tell him in advance that we’re bowlegged
trom riding a mule in a hurry through the war.
At least 5,000 “Bryan marches” have been published.
It really seems that everybody is in the march for Bry
an.
“Is the colonel speaking yet?”
“Yes: he has just called you a liar.”
“If that's the case, he must be pretty well through.
Please hand me my shotgun.”
+ + -r -r -r
SUNNY SOUTH SEWING MACHINE
The Handsomest and Finest Proportioned Sewing Machine Now Manufactured.
High Arm. Light Running.
Noiseless.
with Almost Unlimited Capacity.
A Perfect Machine
GUARANTEED 4>
SHIPPED SUBJECT TO APPROVAL!
And if not entirely satisfactory, after ten days’ trial,
or if not found to bear out the published claims made
~ by us, it may be returned at our expense. What
more can you ask P The Machine is guaranteed to be just as represented, and such as is sold for ^J^W-ill last a life-
time, and out wear any two.of the highest priced machines in the market. A few of the excellent features of tC—
South” Sewing Machine are as follows: All wearing parts are of case-hardened steel, possessing great durability, and by the
^ turning of a screw all lost motion, caused by wear, can be taken up. All parts are fitted so accurately that these machines
4F* are absolutely noiseless, and as easy running as fine adjustment and best mechanical skill is possible to produce. No expense
or time is spared to make them Perfect in Every Respect, as every machine passes a rigid inspection by competent men
before leaving the factory. Nickel-plated. The balance wheel and many of the fine parts are nickel-plated, with other parts
finely enameled and ornamented, giving it a rich appearance. Improved Automatic Bobbin Winder. So simple that a child
can easily operate it, winding the thread automatically on the bobbin as evenly and regularly as the thread on the spool.
This valuable attachment renders possible a perfect control of the shuttle tension, and all annoyance resulting from shuttle
thread breaking while the machine is in motion, which is common to many machines, is entirely obviated. A Self-Setting
Needle and Self-Threading Cylinder Shuttle are used in the “Sunny South” Sewing Machines. They are so simple that any
one can easily operate them in a few minutes time, as our instruction book is fully illustrated, showing how to do all kinds of
fancy work with attachments. The Self-Threading Shuttle is so simple that with two motions of the hand backward and
forward the shuttle is threaded. The Woodwork furnished on “Sunny South” Machines is the choicest oak or walnut. It
t is impossible to give a complete idea as to the elegance of our woodwork by printed description. The covers are known as^
G ' the bent woodwork. The side drawers are in skeleton cases. Center drawers extending the entire length between the stand
castings and are lined with velvet. Side drawers with elegant nickel-plated ring handles. The entire finish is most elaborate,
w f
comparing favorably with the high polish found on pianos, organs, and t.ie choicest articles of household furniture. Extra
G'* Attachments in velvet lined drawers, as shown in the illustration sent free with each machine: 1 Tucker, 1 Ruffler, with
shirring plate, 1 Hemmer Set, (four widths) and Binder, 1 Braider (foot and slide), 1 Thread-cutter. These attachments are
furnished free with each “Sunny South” Sewing Machine, and should not be compared with those furnished with other
machines. Note that these furnished with the “Sunny South” are of steel, adjusting, heavily nickel-plated, and took the
only medal for sewing machine attachments awarded at the World’s Columbian Exhibition. These attachments are the most
complete and expensive ever offered free. Additional Accessories.—Each machine is supplied with the following outfit: 1
^G* Hemmer and Feller (one piece), 10 needles, 0 bobbins, 1 wrench, 1 screw-driver, oil-can, filled with oil, cloth guage and thumb
screw and a book of instructions. The book of instructions is profusely illustrated and answers the same purpose of a
competent teacher.
HOW TO OBTAIN THIS MACHINE Hard times always bring surprises. Bargains in business are sometimes
—— secured below the actual cost of the articles, because money must be obtained,
either to meet obligations or to advance new projects of special importance to the seller. For the last named reason the A
publishers of the “Sunny South” have secured a contract for providing us with an unlimited number of these first-class Sewing © a
Machines under our own name within a given time, at a price which enables us to make the following unparallelled offer: *
: $22 Hie Sunny South for mm Tear aoUThis Mine for $22
S20 OR, THE MACHINE WITHOUT THE PAPER FOR S20.
This machine is perfect in construction, thoroughly tested, ready for immediate use and guaranteed for five years.
Address, SUfflM SOUTH PUBLISHING GO.,
ATLANTA. GEORGIA.
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