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VOL. VI.
THE APPEAL.
I'll BUSHED EVERY F-KIDAY,
By J. P. SAWTELL.
* Terrjafi v oU Subscription:
b.vß
IKVARiABLY IN ADVANCE.
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3 Months.
I Month.
So. Sqr’s.
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2 5.00 12.00 16.00 20.00
3 LOO 15.00 22.00 27.50
4.... 8.00 17,00 25.00 33.00
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Oft*r square, (tCu lines or less,) $1 00 for llie
O'st and 75 cents for each subsequent itiser
lion. X liberal deduction made to parties
who advertise by the year-
Persons sending advertisements should mark
lie number of times‘they desire them inser
ted, or they’wilUbe continued until foidiidimd
■•barbed accordingly.
Transient advertisements must be paid for
at the time of insertion: If not paid for before
the expiration of (bedtime advertised, 25 per
rent, additional will lie charged.
Announcing names of candidates for office,
$5.01). Cash, in all cases .*
Obituary notices over five lines, charged at
" regular advertising rates-
All communications intended to promote the
private ends or interests of Corporations, So
eteti’-B,.or.individuals, will be charged as ad
vertisements.
Job Work, such as Pamphlets, Circulars,
(’aids. Blanks, Handbills,etc., \yill be execu
ted in good style and at reasonable rates.
• All letters,addressed to the Proprietor wil'
to promptly attended to. - . ■
About a liilCi
The nutle stood on the steamers dock,
The land lie .would not tread ;
They pulled the lialter round bis neck,
And crocked hitn tree the bead.
Yet firm and steadfast there be stood,
As though formed for a rule ;
A critter of heroic blood
Was that there jcussed mule.
They cussed and swore—be would not go,
Until be I'el.t inclined ;
• And though they showered blow on blew;
He wouldn’t change bis mind. .
l lie deck baud to the shore then cried,
•'Tips here mule’s bound to slay,’’
And still upon 1 lie critters hide
With lash they tired away.
Ills master Ironi llie shore replied—r
“Tliat boat's about to sail,
As every other means you’ve tried,
Suppose you twist his tail! ”,
•■lts likely that will him land.”
The desk man, brave though pale
Approached him'witli outstretched hand,
To twist that there mules tail.
There came a sudden kick behind !
The man —oh ! where was he?
Ask of the softly blowing wind,
The-flsbcs in the sea !
Lora moment there was not a sound,
As Mint rattle winked his eye,-
As though to ask of those around,
••Now, how is that foe high ?”
• Cut that there mule's throat right away;’*
The Captain did command ; y
Hut the noblest critter killed that day
Was the fearless, brave baud.
T!»c (itirl who Wins,
The times lifts passed a\yay when
Woman must be pale and delicate 10
be called interesting— when she
must be totally ignorant of all prac
tical knowledge to be called refined
wild high;bred —when she must
know nothing of the current politi
cal news of the day, or be called
masculine and strong minded—
weak minds are not desirable.
It is not a sign of high birth* or
refinement to ‘ be ' slekly and igno
rant. Those who affect anything of
the hind arc behind the times, and
must shake up and air themselves,
mentally and physically, or drop
Under the firm strides of common
sense ideas, and be crushed into ut
ter insignificance. '
In dtesc days an active, rosy-fa
ced girl, with brain quick and clear
warm, light heart, a temper quickly
heated at intended insult or injury,
and just as quick to forgive; who is
not afraid of freckles, or to breathe
pure air of heaven, unrestrained by
Ihe-dravvn curtains of a close parlor
bud above all who can speak her
mind and give her opinion on im
portant topics which interest intel
ligent people, is’the true girl who
will make a good woman.
Vinegar— A New York chem
ist has declared that one-balf of the
vinegar in use is made by chemi
cals so poisonous as to gradually
undermine the health of the consu
mer. Sulphuric acid and sugar of
lead make a nice sour, and they are
largely used in vinegar making.
Cider vinegar is the only kind fit
for use That made from acids
should be discontinued.
' The lady who called-the attention
of another to onr patched breeches,
Whereat they both laughed so hear
tily, is informed, that a ncqC' pair'
Will be purchased when, hey hus
band’s “little biH” is settled j it has
been clue nearly a year. Don’tcrit
ciize a printer’s dress so closely,
while wearing silk purchased with
money dwe him,— fftehanyc.
CUTHBERT lllf APPEAL.
m For the Cuthbert Appeal..
• A Tour Through Texas,
OB -
Information for Emigrants.
jSURLESTON COUNTY,
County Seat, Caldwell. Area,
.976 square miles. Population about
10,000. The Brazos RrveP- bounds
th is couuty on the east -and affords
large bodies of the finest bottom
lands, about thirty miles along the
river by five miles wide. It pro
duces over a bale of cotton to the
acre. The uplands or prairies pro
duce o.Ver half a bale to the acre, or
25 bushels of corn, or 12 bushels of
wheat. Corn range from 50 cents
to SI,OO per bosheL and wheat $1
to $2. There is a great deal of
post-Oak lands in the county of easy
cultivation. This is quite a stock
county and fine flocks of sheep are'
seen on all*the prairies; but the
area of cultivated lands is rapidly
increasing from year to year, as im
migration' come in. There is a
male and female academy in Cald
well, and several Elementary schools
all over the county. The Freed
mcn do better here than in many
counties/thcir wages being about
sls per month specie. Land vary
in price according to quality and
improvements, from $5 to S3O per
acre. This is a fine count} 7 for Hogs,
on account of the’ abundance of
■mast; all the farmers make bacon
for their own use and some for mar
ket. • Houston and Galveston are
the markets. ’
BURNET COUNTY, . .
County Seat, Burnet. Area, 995
square miles. Wheat and corn
with till the small. grains, are the
chief crops. Cotton is not grown
to any great extent, all other pro-,
ducts arc abundant and cheap.—
There is a superior quality of iron
ore, itt this county. Petroleum oil
is found near the county seat bps
no effort is yet made to procure it
for use. ‘ There is a plenty of fine
limestone, which-makes a beautiful
.white lithe. . The water is good and.
in large supply in .springs and
streams. This ’county is. in the
hilly or mountainous region and
has a delightful bracing air, though
in latitude as low as '3O deg. The
San Gabriel-and its small, clear,
tributaries arc the chief streams in
-the northern and eastern part,-
while the Colorado is on the-. Smith
side Ot the county. v Dense cane
brakes • cover a large part of the
county, and the surfape is generally
rocky, with a rich loorny soil/
What are known *as’*tlic Marble
Falls of the. Colorado ate .in this
county. These falls' afford admira
ble water-power. The •marble va
ries-from a pure white to a jet
black. This county lias, several
steam atid water mills, and some of
the finest water power in the State.
.CALDWELL county,
County 'Scat, Lockhart. Area;
535 .square milhs: Population
about 8,000. Though this is one
of*the smallest counties, it is proba
bly equal to any in richness of soil,
salubrity, and beauty of scenery.—
The same may be said about the
fertility of this county, as about
Caldwell, with about half the coun
ty prairie. The piesquit grows
spontaneously all over the county
• and makes it one of the best pas :
.turagesdn the State. Almost all
vegtables’urc grown here, but the
gardens often suffer from summer
droughts. Lwing is cheap, butter,
lard and bacon 10 cents, per pound;
eggs 8 to 10 cents, per dozen chick
ens 12£ cents each, etc. The coun
ty sends to market every year (rotn
5,000 to lO,GoO head of cattle, and
2,000 to 3,000 horses* and mules,
besides cotton, wool, hides, etc. —
Lockhart.is thifty. miles south of
Austin, and it is difficult to find a
more beautiful little town, sur
rounded by live-oaks. Here are
tbe celebrated Lockhart Springs,
about twenty in number, gurgling
with pure cool water, of several dif
ferent minerals. Ere long this is
bound to be a great summer resort
for those in search of health and
pleasure. This delightful place,
has to be seen to be appreciated.—
Lockhart is a most flourishing town
with some four or five churches,
several schools and a dozen stores.
Principle markets, Sayacca and Gal
veston ; distance- to each about the
same. Galveston is reached by
''Railroad and ” therefore the most
visited.
caluoux county,
County Scat, Area,
684 square miles. will be'seen
by fef'ering to Bye map of Texas
that this couufyis nearly surround
icd by water, and like all the coast
, counties'the surface is near a dead
GUTHBERT, GEORGIA, FRIDAY, JULY 19, 1872.
leveL The soil is not considered
very productive, and is better for
the stock raisfir than the farmer.—
The population is between 3,000
and’4,ooo, nearly all of which are
in the towns of Indiariola and La
vacca, which are twe of the. princi
ple Seaports, of the west, where
there is a very extensive and rapid
ly increasing commerce. There are
four or five churches in Indianola,
and tiro or three in Lavacea, with
quite a number of good schools.—
The San Antonio and Mexican Gulf
Railroad commences at Lavacco,
and the Indianola Railroad at In
dianola, and both connect a few
miles west of Lavacca, and proceed
by a eommon track to Victoria and
from thence to San Antonio.
CAMERON COUNTY,
County Seat, Brownsville. ' Area,
3,000 square miles. This county is
in the extreme South-eastern por*
’ tion of the State, and was first set
tled by Americans during the war
with Mexico in 18.46 —47. Browns
ville is perhaps the only town worth
naming, though Point Isabel, Bra
zos and Santiago have, a few in
habitants. The"'- .population of
Brownsville is believed to be about
0,000, and there are not probably
. 500 more in the county. There has
heretofore been a large /Mexican
trade at Brownsville,, but it lias
now greatly declined under the in
fluence of the Mexican law .called
Zona Libre, which" enables goods to
be landed on the Mexican si.de of
the liio Grande.free of duties. This
is a great slock county, and, except
the valley of the Rio Grande Is fit
for little else. . But tile valley of the
Rio Grande furnishes many thou
sand acres of the ’richest lands, ad
mirably adapted to cotton, corn
and. sugar-jaue. It is said • that
farms are now rapidly being opened
in this valley. This and the other
eoun-ties'of the Rio -Grande are sep
arated from ‘ the .balance of the
Stat* by a vast region uninhabited
except" by herdsmen - with* their
thousands and tens of thousands of
cattle, horses and sheep. «
CHAMBERS COUNTY,
County Seat, WallisvillcL' Area
900 square miles. .Population say
I,2oo.This ts a coast county, in
eluding both banks of the Trinity
River at its "outlet into Galveston
Bay, and also including the bay .as
far down as Red Fish bar.. But
our map will show its boundaries
and its land and water area, better
than any description give,
and llie same may be said of all the
counties; lienee I have generally
omitted to*.describe what can be so
much, more.- satisfactorily seen, by
one glance at the map. Every, one
that expects to Emigrate', to Texas
should'have a Texas map. This-is
.chiefly a prairie county, and though
it has much good alluvial land in
the Trinity valley, yet stock-rais
ing is the chief business. llo*gs
are also abundantly raised in the
bottoms.’ Products, Coni, cotton,
etc., as in other counties. Rice, "is
also grown successfully, and .sugar
catje promises to become a pcofita
bhi.crop, as’ indeed it already, is
found to be in this apd other comi
ties above. This county lias the
advantage .of regular communica
tioifte with Galveston, by naviga
tion over'the bay, and up the'Trini
ty, so .that its products can be easi
ly placed in market at a good price.
This-county has übuußiqts of fruits,
such as,peaches, apricots, necta
rines, and • plums. It also has a
large supply- of good timber on
both banks of the Trinty, and sup
plies Galveston market with much
of its fuel. Wallasvillc and the old
Spanish town of Analmac ate" the
principle-villages. The wealth and
population are both very small in
this county though it offers many
advantages to the imigrants on ac
count of market.
CHEROKEE COUNTY,*
County Seat, Rusk. Area, 1,144
square miles. Population 12,000.
This is one of the finest counties of
the State, and is far above the aver
age in wealth, population and im.
provements. There are five schools
in Rusk, Alto, Larissa, and com
mon schools in all neighborhood. —
This is called the “ Iron county” of
Texas, on account of the great abun
dance of excellent iron ore in all the
.hills. During the war some foun
dries were established, but I un
derstand there is now only one con
tinued, though probably no busi
ness could be conducted more prof
itably with a little capital. The
rivers of this county, as will readily
be seen by the-map give an abun
dant supply of water, are
also numerous. This is a heavily
timbered county, and the extensive
piue and oak forests furnish large
amounts of lumber for 4he counties
'further west, where lumber is
scarce. Cherokee County is consid
ered one of the best farming coun
ties in the State, as there is a very
large amount .of productive land,
and very little, that cannot be profit
ably cultivated. The average yield
is about 1,200 lbs. cotton .in the
seed, and 20 to 35 bushels of corn
per aqre ; of wheat 12 bushels. Ev
ery farmer has ail his stock, he
wants, including cattle, horses,
sheep, hogs, etc,, though stock-rais
ing is not an exclusive business.—
Wine is made by all that take the
trouble from native grape, and
peaches, apples, plums, etc., suc
ceed well, and there are some splen
did orchards in this county. I will
here say that pears succeed as well
6r better in Texas than any other
fruits, and there are of’ them
than I have ever seen in any other
State. Unijnprovcd but good farm
lands can be bought at from $2, to
$lO, per acre, but improved farms
are valued according to the im
provements. Manufactories don't
receive much attention in tliis coun
ty.
CLAY COUNTY,
County Seat, Henrietta. Area,
1,110 square, miles. This is anew
and very sparsely settled-county,
the position of which is shown, by
the map. .It is at present a stock
county, though it has some excel
lent farming lands in its river and
creek valleys. .The Big and Little
Wichita arc the principle streams,
the banks of which are generally
covered with timber, This county
first began to be settled by stock
raisers in 1858‘; but-the Indians de
terred emigrants from going in, and
there are stilt but few inhabitants.
The soil is well 'adapted to wheat
and other cereals. The surface is
said to be broken and hilly.
Coleman County. Area, ’I,OOO
square miles.•-
Concho County. Area, 1’,0'25
square miles.
Callahan County. Alma, 900
square mjjes. . *
• The above three counties are yet
unorganized, and have but a few
inhabitants,, mostly engaged *in
stock-raising. Thei'e are new coun
ties, with hills only fit for grazing,
anti narrow valleys between, with
fine springs and some small streams.
Timber is scarce ; climate very dry
and salubrious. These counties are
said to afford fine sheep pasturage.
T. M. A.
Yoimaf ABiierßa.
Tluere is nothing more .pleas ten t
to behold than a bright-eyed, well
behaved boy, who "thinks of some
thing besides his oWn boisterous fun
and rude forwardness; who pays
some respect to years, *and does' not
crowd himsell where he has not
■been asked and rs not wanted.—
Many such gre not. They enjoy
everything that is gay and boyish,
and when among those who are old
er show tile;u excellence of manner
Fy giving preference to-age. They
trad rather Sprve than, be served
They never dream of aping the
style of the street rowdy who rs al
ways. str-iviirg to get up a elreaprep
utation for bravely—mostly by
misrepresenting the few words
which pass between himself and oth
ers. Such youths are types of true:
gentlemen, distinguished by courte
sy and correct feeling. They cafob
with enthusiasm at everything that
is exulting and happy, have their
own boisterous fun andjolity, but
hardly ever’dream they are men.
Tho opposites are the nuisances of
life. All over the. world can be"
found the true varieties. Some- of
the choicest little gentlemen we
have ever seen have* been among
those who were (Jompe’.led to toil
for their daily bread.
• Tattling. —Never repeat a story
unless you are certain it is correct
and not even then unless something
is to be -gained, either of interest
to yourself or for the g’ood of the
person - concerned. Tattling is a
mean and wicked practice, and lie
who indulges in it, grows .more
fond of' it in as he is suc
cessful
A young lady says that a gen
tlemen ought never to feel discoura
ged when the ‘momentous question*
is negatived by the object of his
choice, “for in life, as in grammar,
we always decline.before wo-, conju
gate.”
*2 • • , * - .
Said a youngster in high glee,
displaying his.purchase to.-TA/psam
friend on the
cocoa-nuts for ten Pi
make me sick
won't •**'■ . • .
Hindoo Cleanliness.
*
During seven years’, residence in
India,T never knew of water being
drawn from ponds or pools for cook
ing purposes. While on journeys,
be they never so long, or the heat
never, so great, the natives will not
drink except they can obtain water
from good wells or running streams,
and iii their own dishes, which they
always carry with them, As for
foul smells, we had far rather take
our chances for pure air in a city
or town of India than in two-thirds
of the wards of any city in Ameiica
where the population exeee'ds fifteen
thousand inhabitants.
The crows, vultures,’ pariah dogs,
jackals and the' periodical rains
which co'me hi torrents and wash
away every remnant of filth, are a
lpore effective board of health than
any we know,of in this enlightened
country. There arc no out houses
thereto send out night and-day the
horrid effluvia which taints the air
of all our towns and cities. There
is,a caste Os people called mehtars,
whose inherited occupation is td do
the sweeping and to remove the filth
from the houses and the streets, and
who are paid by the families or by
the village or city authorities. All
filth incessantly removed by them
to some out-of-the-way place, and.at
the proper time it is taken for en
riching the fields or for burning
brick.
The immense waste and decom
position of animal and vegetable
matter caused by the prodiglaity o-f
thte. American people,, is entirely un
known in India. - Carefulness and
strict economy of food are .absolute
ly That there are stag
nant pools and •nnclcanliness is not
to be denied, but. comparatively,
India has greatly the advantage of
America. • .
In .personal cleanliness • the peo
ple of the.plains of India are incom
parably in advance of the Americans ■
Or Europeans. The Abbe Dubois,
who spent eighteen years of research
and inquiry, among the Hindoos, “as
one of them, conforming exactly in
all things to their manners, to their
style of living and -clothing, and
wen to most of their' prejudices;”
•says: “In their conduct and the
whole intercourse of life, the Bra
mins have nothing so much at heart
as cleanliness,” and goes on to re
cite a'great number of circumstan
ces which render it necessary for a
Bramin to - bathe. They always
’bathe before prepraing or eating
food. .All good Bramrns bathe once
a day, fastidious ones three times.
Other castes, though not so strict
as the Brand ns in washing their
bodies and garments, are yet clean
er thin Western nations. Many
of the’-poorcr .and lower castes are
dirty through extreme poverty and
overwork, but I hardly, think that
there could be found one who could
say, (isdid an English laborer on be
ing prescribed a .bath for a certain
ailment, ‘T haven’t washed for this
ere forty.year, anti I'll not begin
now.” ‘ .
TUE CLIENT AND IIIS LAWYER
Two lawyers when a knotty case waso’er
Shook hautls, and were as friendly as.before.
“Zounds!” said the client, “I would-f ain
knowjicrw • *
You can,be friends, who were such foes just
now ?” ' , •
.“Thou, foo! !” said one; “we lawyers though
so keen,
Like shears, ne’er .cut ourselves, but,what’s
between.*’ •
A noted wag in a College, one
morning, read a- theme of unusual
merit. The President being suspi
cious, asked pointedly if it was or
iginal. “Why, yes, sir,” was the re
ply, “it had original over it in the
paper I took it fronr.”
-*• A Georgia man lias his third
wife, thirty children, several tlious
■and acres of land, two. thousand
head of cattle and about tbe same
number of sheep. Happy man.
When couple of young people
’strongly devoted to each other, com
mence to eat onions, it is safe to
pronounce them engaged.
Pay yoUr little outstanding
earthly bills, and don’t romance
about the-sassing dues of heaven.
—The man who-popped the ques
tion by starlight got his sweet"
herart’s consent in a twinkling.
You should 'not stone your
neighbor, but you may rock Ms ba-
bv. ‘ . —r.«l»
-* y ; ouDA WATER
A deslrah: s- POWELL’S, Trustee,
.■ujrj'ist, Bookseller and Siatiouer,
|Beeswax .
am- * ■
i. ’ ‘ T. S.rOWELL, Trustee,
Druggist, liookseiler aim Stationer
ITIlU’k Twain oil the Wing.
Says Mark Twain iw discribiog
his travlesi I got into the cars and
took a seat in juxtaposition io a
female. That female’s face was a
perfect insurance company for her
—it insured her against ever getting
married to any body except a blind
nian. Her mouth looked like a
crack in a dried lemon and there
was no more expression in- her face
than there is in a cup of cold cus
tard. She appeared as if she had
been through one famine and got
about two thirds through auother.
She was eld enough to be great
grand mother to Mary that had a
little lamb. She was chewing prize
pop corn, and carried in her hand a
yellow rose, While a band box and
a cotton umbrella nestled sweetly
by her side* I couldn’t guess
whether she was on a mission of
charity, or going west tq a
aawmjlk I was full of curiosity to
hear her speak ; so I said :
“The exigenciei of the time
require great circumspection in a
person who is traveling.”
Says she, “What ?”
Says I, “Che orb of day shines
resplendent in the vault above.”
She hitched around uneasy like,
then she raised her umbrella and
said, “I don’t want any of your sass
—git out” and I got out.
Then I took a seat alongside a
male fellow, who looked like the
ghost of Hamlet lengthened out.
He was a stately cuss, and he was
reading.
Said I, “Mister, did you ever
see a camel leopard ? ’ I said camel
leopard bqcau.se it is a pious animal,
and never without getting
down on its knees. lie said he
hadn’t seen a camel leopard. Then,-
said I, “Do you chew ?”
He said, “No sir.”
Then I said, “How sweet is
nature ?”
, lie took this for a conundrum
and said he didn’t know. Then he
said he was deeply interested in the
history of a great man, “Alas!”
he exclaimed, “we are but few.”
, I told, him I knew one, “the man
made my cooking stove was a.great
man.”
Then lie’ asked, ‘.‘would I read ?”
Says I, “what have you got ?”
He replied, “Whatt’s Hymns,”
“Reveries by Moonlight,” and “How
to Spcnd-the Sabbath.”
I said, “None of them for Han
nah,” but if lie had that Los An
geles Business Directory I would
take a little read.
Then said the strangqr, “Young
man, do you see these gray hairs?”
I told him I saw.
Well, says he, your hairs will
be grayer than these before that’
Directory ever sees daylight.
Said I, “you needn’t think these
hairs are any sign of wisdom, its
or.ly a sign that your system lacks
iron ; and I advise, you to go home
and swallow a crow bar.” He took
this for irony, and what little entente
cordiale there was between us was.
spilled. It turned out that he was
chaplain of a base bifll club.
When we got to Rochester I
called for a bowl of bean soup. It
ought to be called lead soup. I
send you the receipt for making it:
“Take a lot of water, wash it well,
and broil it until its brown on both
'sides : tlien very carefully pour one
bean, into it and. let it sihimer.
When the bean begins to get rest
less,, sweeten it with salt, then put
it up in air tight cans, hjtch each
canto a brick, and chuck them
overboard, and the soup is done.
The above receipt originated
with a man in lowa, who got up
suppers on odd occasions for Odd
Fellows. He lias a receipt for oys
ter soup ; leaving out the salt. ,
Speaking of lowa rem; nds me of
the way I got -.the money to .pay.
for my ticket and pay for that fel
low’s supper. I bet a fellow a dollar
that I could tell him how much wa
ter to a quart went under tho rail
road bridge over the Mississippi at
Dubuque in a year. He bet, and I
said two pints to a quart. I. won
the bet, but after all that supper
wnsan awful swindle. If the city
didn’t spttle faster than its coffee
did, its .old settlers’ club would be'
a failure, aiid the city too.
Dubuque is celebrated for its
fine turnout on the streets ; while
I was there a- wagon upset and
spilled a lot of vv'omem I didn’t
see it—l . ’ e other way.
J, Jill 12-ts
RestaitPant &-Bau*
I have fitted up one of the *• best Bars and
Restaurants in S. W. Georgia, where the
FINEST LIQUORS AND CIGARS
will be kept, and where all iray enjoy a
meat at short, notfei.
mavd-Sm GEO. G. "BANCROFT
ISutlci* artd liis Dog.
A correspondent sends us llie fol
lowing anecdote of Ben Butler,
which he says lias never appeared
in print, but as it illustrates the
characters of tbe .man, it is too good
to be lost.
. Ben Butler waS a down east law
yer before he got to lie a major
general and a representative of his
district in Congress. Like all law
yers, Ben had a hard pull of it at
the start, and perhaps the sliarpnesa
acumen for which he is so univer
sally celebrated were acquired at
this early period of his life when he
was striving for a practice, nnd the
odds were brains or starvation.
One day while sitting in his office
there entered a long-legged gaunt,
hatchet-faced m specimen of the
genus Yankee, who looked sharp
enough to make his meals oft’pins
and needles, and who thus accos
ted the future Congressman :
“Mr. Lawyer', Y am going into
a little bit of law business, and as
you seem to be a right smart,
plucky sort of chap, I thought I
might as Well give the job to you.”
“All right” says the lawyer, “you
can’t trust your case in better
hands.”
“Well,'then, I had a ham hang
ing iu an* out-shed, and a neigh
bor’s dog came along and ate it.
What would you do?”
“Why, prosecute the owner of
the dog, of course. Make the
fellow pay for damages.”
“That’s the talk, Mr. lawyer,”
said the Yankee, with a sly smile
begining to work around the cor
ners of bis eyes and mouth. “But
you see—l don’t know as it makes
any difference—the dog was your’n.”
Butler'opened liis eyes a little at
this onslaught, but lie wasn't going
to be taken aback in that manner,
even by a brother Y r ankee.
“What do you value your ham
at?” asked Butler, drawing out
his wallet. *
“Well, I guess five dollars will*be
letting you off cheap,” said the
YankeJ “for it was an all-fired good
ham.”
Without entering a word of pro
test, Butler paid the money and
then said :
“There is your damage for the
ham. Now fork over the ten dol
lars.”
“What for ?” inquired tho Yan
kee, in his turn astonished.
“For my legal advice,” said But
ler “You don’t suppose I can
work without a fee, do you V y
Mr.’Yankee, was bit, so drawing
a face as long as his legs, lie slowly
counted out the money, and inward
ly vowed he would bring no more
law business before the youthful
but razor-like dispenser of Coke and
Blackatone.
A certain elder, who was noted
for seldom being up to time, seldom
animated, and seldom very brief,
once kept a congregation waiting
a long time for his appearance, and
when at last he did come, he preach
ed them a sermon of uuusnal length
on the text “Freed my Lambs.”
He had not finished when the
original old minister rose from a
Seat in the congregation and said*,
“Brother, I have had some experi
ence in raising lambs myself, and I
have found that the following rules
are absolutely essential to success
ful lamb-raising : * First, give them
food in .season ; second, give them
a little at a time,and third, give it to
them warm.”
“ Fred,” said a father to Lis
son, “I hear that you and yonr wife
quarrel, and wrangle every day.
Let me warn you against such a fa
tal practice.” “Whoever told you
that, father, was totally mistaken !
My wife and I havn’t spoken to one
another for a month.”
Ail the lower animals, and
most of the insects, as-far as investi
gations have been poshed, appear to
hare limb3 on the right side invari
ably stronger than their fellows on
the opposite side. Physiologists
have not yet been able to give a sat
isfactory solution of the problem.
—An old lady who inqnii*ed for
“the dollar vardeu hat’’ went away
sorrowing when the clerk told her
that they were just out, bqt he had
plenty of “six dollar’vardens.”
A Connecticut sheriff says: “If
any man doubts the Bible, doctrine
foimar depravity, I only; -trie that
wriuld
ine my stock and ptices before One
where to make their purchases, if/
and prices are not rttffideut inda#
you to purchase, the fault, will h f
If you can do as well, or bett-A
than elsewhere, it will afford me psp sa
waitonyon ’ ' •-
Ca!iand«ce me! 3. EDWARDS, >
ma}22-dm , Spiityg V>l. (j*.
NO 29*
A jUillionare iii Sackcloik
and Ashes.
A Saratoga correspondent of tlifc
Albany Times says:
Among the recent arrivals at Sar
atoga is a young gentleman of great
fortune, who is a regular summer
visitor here, and who lias Invariably
made a great display. This season
lie'proposes to do the place on a
quieter scale, on account of lii§
mother’s recentdeath. Thislshow
he goes about it: He has a suit of
rooms at the Congress; tliiitj linde?
his supervisioh,’ keen so ar
ranged qs to present a rather som
bre appearance; for,, out of respect
for his mother’s memory, they liavo
been put in mourniflgi A deep
black border’ruiis around the ceih
ings, while the wall paper is of a
very gloomy color; the furniture
which recently arrived, is from
Egypt, and is exceedingly grdtesqfid
in appearance and mysterious iu
style like.it has' ever be
fore appeared in Saratoga. The
gentleman announces that he will
not enter a ball-room this summer;
but will entertain his IriCdds iff liil
rooms —in an elegant and costly
manner, of course —no levity. lie
is to drive a four-in hand, his
groom and coachman js to be attired
in mourning; and mourning lap
robes; like funeral palls, are to be
spread over the seats of his carria
ges, which will bo painted in keep
ing with the habiliments of woe.
For these emblems of sack cloth and
ashes lie pays SSOO pef Week.—
Shoddy society calls this “filial de
votion,” and speaks of him as “such
a good son,” “but so odd and eccen
tric,” while common-sense people
«ire unkind enough to call him*
snob, and one of the most outre
kind.
A Good One foe Smokees.— An
aged negress, whose piety had s4-
cured for her an extensive reputa
tion, in walking her usual round df
visits, dropped in upon a neighbor
who was equally well known as ft
temperance man and a hater of to
bacco*
• After being courteously rtceirf
ed, the negress pulled from her
pocket a long pipe, and conimenecd
smoking some very “union” tobac
co, to the infinite disgust of hes
host. The man maintained his
composure for several minutes : but
the fumes and smoke became too
powerful for him and rising from
the chair he said :
“Aunt Chloe, do ydu think jrdti A
good Christian ?”
“Yes, brudder, I speeiks I is.”
“Do you believe the Bible; aunt ?
“Yes, brudder;”
“Do you know there is a pas
sage in the Scriptures which de
clares that nothing unclean shall iri
herit the, kingdom'of Heaven ?”
“Yes, I’ye heard of it;”
“Do ydn believe it
“Yes.”
“Well, Chloe, you cannot entef
into the kingdom df heaved; be
cause there is nothing So unclean
as the breath of a sttioker. What
do you say to that ?”
“Why, I specks to leave my
breath behind nie wberi I go- td
heaven.”
—The Fort Wayne Sentinel
the following , cheerful ahhOuntic :
ment : A coffin room has befeh estab
lished on Wayne Street, in the rfear
of the Sentinel building. Any ohO
feeling like attacking the editor Will
save his eS tfotible by doming
ground that way and selecting his
box.”
— ; A Yankee doctor has contrived
to extract from sausages a pow
erful tonic, which lie says contains
the WliOle stfertgth of the original
bark. He calls it the sulphate Os
canine.
What can be wetter than a ffo
man’ with a Cataract iti lifct a
waterfall on her head,- a creek iri
her back forty springs in her skirts
a high tied shoes, and a notion in
her head ?
“Do write and fear not,” is
what the girls say to their corres
pondents*
Praise is sunshine to a child, rind
there is no child that does not need
it<
When does rriin bedome too fa*
milliar with a lady ? Wh&tt It Be
gins to pat ter On her back:
Someone says “the lobster *is
a posthumous work of creation; for
it is only red after its death.”
Why is Ireland likely to
come the richest country i« the
world t Because the capital is ah
wayirDuhlia*
’ 1 rfwe dollar trill pay T or ie
\bat<.mce of the year .-