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licikly Democrat ' sK | I, Editor ami Piop’r *•“ - ■■ *=g^DAY. JULY 27,1882- scuscnnmoy. for Anno® i ^ tii 75 10 ** i !> ia advance. aiivebtisino rates asd rules. . iTer ti^tn«*» ;s insert,;. * 1 * * * at $2 per square ■ . in ,-rU'jn aui for each subse ts «rt! q 5 '" ,,e ' is e i ? ht -oli<l lines of this type. * ^ t( . rBj made will* contract adverti- n9 ticei of eight lines are $15 per or *■'.'» per annum. Local notices jffhanthree months are subject to tI *r*ntr»cn <, |Ver , i«"rs who desire their*<1- wrti.entrnt-changed, must give us two *rh!nzin-' advertisements, unless othcr- >e siipolat'"! in contract, will be changed m - per s jtuire. \Urri:»"* an 1 obituary notices, tributes of '4rt"»nd other kindred notices, charged *Tftjher advertisemeuls. W ilT, rti<emenl-< must take the run of the r as we do not contract to keep them ^Anauuncemenh-for candidates are $10, if "ilin^ireVue upon the appearance of the ndrertioemciit. and the money will be col- hdrfs-s 1,1 l»y the proprie.ot We9 hall adhere strictly tothe aboverales, j ivili depart from them under nocircum- lW«ces. 'bCMXKSS & 1*11 OFJSSSIONAL. ‘ VV. M. HARRELL,” Attorney At Law, ibiNDiUM'R, Georgia. Will be found at McGill's office. All bn-iuess entrusted to his care will receive prompt at ten* inn. t .’odectious a specialty. ' Jane 1. 1882—(itn. MEDICAL CARD. Dr. M. J. Nicholson, Has removed to Twilight, Miller coun- tr (tcor-ia. Olflce in J. S. (Hilton’s ■tore. ° fcb.9,’82. MEDICAL CARD. Dr. E . J . M o r. g a n- Has removed his office to the drug store, formerly occupied by Hr. Harrell. £tesi dence on Wc.-t street, south of Nhotwell, when falls at night will reach him. CHARLES C. BUSH, Attorney at Law COLQUITT, GA. Prompt attention given to all business en trusted to me. DENTISTRY. J. C . Curry, D. D. S., Can he found daily at his office on South Bread s'rce'. up stairs, iu K. Johnson’s building, where he is ready to attend to the wants of die public at reasonable rates. dec-5-78 D mcoili., M. o’neal McGILL & O’NEAL. Attorneys at Law. BAINUKIDGE, GA. Their office will be found over the post of- lee. t*a, «. DOKAl.SOV, BYRON B. BOWKS. BOWER & DGHALSON. Attornsys and Counsellors at Law. Office in the court house. Will practice iu Decatur and adjoining counties, and elsewhern by special contract. a-26 7 DO C TO R mTlT B ATT lT, Dentist. Office over llmds 8tore, West side coert house. lias line dental engine, and will have everything to make his office fiW'Class. Terms cash. Office hours 9 *• nt, to 4 p. in. jan. I3tf JEFF D. TALBERT, Attorney at Law, Bainbriilge. Georgia. M ill practice in all the courts, and busi ness intrusted to his care will be promptly attended to. Office over store of M. E. Barnett & .Son. feb.23,'82. DR. L. H. PEACOCK, " Respectfully tenders his professional serv ices to the people of Baiubridge nud vicini ty. Office over store of J. D. Harrell & Bro Residence on West end of Broughton Street, where he can be found at night. *Aprii c, 1881— House For Rent, 1 hereby offer for rent that comfortable festlence lately occupied by Mr. Fred ninth. It i s commodious, with all neces sarv out houses, anil splendid garden at tached. Apply to Thomas Scott, or the ua- detsijnod, 3T 1 ’ 82. J. L Boynton-. 1 * E3IOYAL, , ^*' s > s to notify my friends, patrons and the puhli- generally, that 1 have removed wv Harness Store next to F. L. babbit's on b '.uli Dread street, where I hope to receive :n t'*turo. the congratulations and patron- of my friends. Thanking the public for I 1 *' 1 " favors, and hoping a continuance of the same, 1 am Yours Respectfully, , J YOU 11 liOKN. Jan. 5. 1882. Baiubridge Academy. The above institution will begin oh the last Monday in August, the 2btli. A full ana able eorps of teachers will be employ ed and every endeavor made to give satis- aitton. Patronage of citizens of Bain- , ge and the surrounding country solicil- w - Tuitiou as heretofore. . Re- pectfully, -2, J. e Withkrspoox. MACOIN ’RMphpi MiBLl For special instruction in bookkeeping, Penmanship, business arithmetic, corres pondence, bill heading, telegraphy aud general business routine, W. WcKAY, - - PRN0IPAL. Par terms, information as to boarding to tlle principal. P. O. box »»s Macon, Georgia. BY BEX. E. RUSSELL. | BAIXBRIDGE, GA, THURSDAY, JULY 2T, 18S2. YOL. 11.—NO. 40 Eve’s Daughters. A Louisville Belle has in her parlor ^icautiful embroidered motto, “E Plur ^jus, yum, yum 1” Lowell gixls put obnoxious gallants to flight by grouping around a feiiow and kissing him to pieces. The latest ‘‘edition” of the Btrictly fashionable girl in full ‘-bangs” is a pret ty good counterfeit of a porcupine at bay. A Hot Springs girl makes nine feet at a standing jump, but when the other girls hear of it they only make mouths. The prettiest girl in Hot Springs wears blue top stockings, and isn’t afraid to show them either. We saw them hanging on a line iu the back yard.—Ex. A writer in Lippincott’s Magazine says: Woman is primarily a being who listens,” and a graceless and libel- lions wretch at our elbow says, ‘‘Yes, at a keyhole.” A Texas girl has been b’riten five times in the calf of the leg by a rattle snake without sufferng any bad effect The rattlesnake is dead—probably choked to dea'h on sawdust. “Girls, invite your dashing Thomases to toe a mark and make three full jumps, with an egg in each hand. If neither egg is broken by involuntary spueezing, the young man will do to “tie to.” Sirs. Sat ah J. Van Buren’s face now ornaments the columns of the press of the land. She is the discoverer of a -‘ladies’ tonic.” Sarah knocks the colored hosiery right off of Lydia E. Pinliham for beauty, and of course will sell the medicine. Senator Mahone’s wife returned from an Eumperian tour recently, and her husband welcomed her home with a set of elegant diamonds worth $40,000. Mrs. Mahone is said to wear the hand' sotnest and most costly jewels of any lady connected with public life. The new craze among women is to form “broom brigades,” the object of which is to become more proficient in the manuil of the boom. In order that women may become more skilled in the use of her chief weapons of de fense, we suggest that the teakettle brigade be next organized. The art of squirting hot water in the face of a de tested man is yet only in its infancy. Blue veils may be fashionable; they may bi5 pretty ; they may be cheap and a’l that, but no lady should wear a blue veil if she wears a veil for what one should be worn for, and that is a pro tection to the face. The blue color admits an actinic ray, which is an enemy to a fair complexion and the cunning aud industrious ally to freckles, tan color, and chemical action on the cuticle. The ancient but good Susan Anthony, who holds kinship with Senators Laphaui and Anthony, through her grandfather and grandmother, promises to make it warm for these distinguish ed statesmen if they do not come up to the scratch on the woman suffrage question, now, for the first time, refer- red to a Congressional committee. That’s right, Susan ; if there is any work in these antedilvian Senators, get it out of them. The methods of trade are ever chang ing, if not improving. Two mercantile firms in New York have each “taken two of their youngest, best looking and cheekiest sales-ladies and sent them out oo the road with samples to work up trade, which under the old system ol drumming, was fast slipping away from them. The success of the ladies has been quite phenomeual. Hardly in a single instance have they failed to se cure large orders.” Why They I>o Not Put an “H in Sugar. When an old fashioned merchant in New Jetsey came to look over an order made out by hia new-fashioned clerk the other day, be looked over his spectacles and said: -James. I see you have spelled sugar without an -fa.’ ” -• Yes. sir; that is the proper way.” -But 1 hav*spelt it with au - h for the last twenty-nine years - ” “Cant help that.sir. Sugar should not be spelled with an -h,’ ” “Well, mebbe it shouldn't,” sighed the old man. “ mebbe it stiouldn't. 1 presume this mixing glucose does make ft difference somewhere.” Disagreeable People. ^ ulgar souls who ask personal ques tions. The “big I” and “little you” indi vidual. People who have more curiosity than manners. People who' overwork the ajectives “awful” and “splendid.” llich and vulgar men who fancy that it is aristocratic to be uncivil. Girls who mistake impertinence for wit, and good breeding. Newspapers which think there is no news worth printing except the details of crime. The man who borrows his neighbor’s Democrat as regularly as the week rolls around. Nasty young and old men who stand on street corners and make mean re marks about the women who pass. The wealthy, arrogant man who only has a pleasant “how-dy-do” and smile when he%ants a favor of you. Wealthy people who have to resort to arrogance of manner to prevent their innate vulgarity from boiug detected, Men who insinuate that such and such women are flirtatious; tiiat they know it because said women tried to flirt with them. Men who stalk into the composing- room of The Democrt, or any other priming office, and lolls around in su-h a manner as to disturb the men at work. Young ladies who at a ball insist on breaking rules of etiquette by going jrom one seat already filled to another, simply because a favorite is in that other seat. Men who parade themselves in pub lic places and in social affairs only for the purpose of making themselves con spicuous and appeasing their own per sonal vanity. Pearls of Thought. What makes life dreary is the want of motive. To see what is right and not do it is want of oourage ti No man was ever written out of repu tation but by himself. . “.Recollection is the only paradise from which we cannot be turned out. If you wish to remove avarice you must remove its mother—luxury. Charity and personal force are the only investments worth anything. We carry all our neighbors crimes in the light and throw all our own over our shoulder. It is in general more profitable to reckon up our defects than to boast of our attainments. Pleasure is the mere accident of our being and work is natural and most holy necessity. , There are none so low but they have their trumphs. Small succeses suffice for small souls. Youth is the tassel and silken flower of life; age is the full corn, ripe and solid in the ear. Education begins the gentleman, but reading, good company and reflection must finish him. Without the virtue of humility one can neither be honest in poverty nor Contented in abundance. 1 As concerns the quantity of what is to te read, there is a single rule—read much, but not many works. The best way todiscipline one’s heart against scandal is to believe all stories false which ought not to be true. A memory without blot or contami nation is an exquisite treasurer and an inexhaustible source of pure refresh ment. Sympathy of an Indignant friend. The Little Shoes I>id it. The following touching incident’ which we clip from an exchange, is worthy of being preserved in letters of gold. A young man, who has been reclaimed from the vice of in temperance, was called upon toAell how he was led to give up drinking. He arose, but looked for a moment very confused. All he could say was. “The little shoes,”as if his heart was in liis throat, he kept repeating this. There was a stare of perplexity on every face, and at length some thoughtlesjyouug people began to titter. The man, in all of his embarrassment, heard the sound, and rallied at once. The light came into his eyes with a flesh he drew himself up atid addressed the audience the choking went from bis throat. Yes, friends, he said, in a voice that cut its way clear as a deep toned bell, what ever you may thick of it, I've told the truth—the little shoes did it. I was a brute aud fool; strong drink made me both, and starved me in the bargain. I suffered—I deserved to suffer alone—no man who has a wife aud child—for the wtmian gets the worse share, But I am no speaker to enlarge on that; I'll stick to the little shoes I saw one night when 1 was all but done for—the saloon keeper’s child holding out her foot to her father to look at her fine new shoes. It was a simple thing, but my friends, no fist ever struck me such a blow as those little new shoes. They kicked reason into me. What reason hud I to clothe others with fineries, and provide not even coarse clothing for my own, but let them eo bare? And there outside was my shivering wife, and blue chilled child, ou a bitter cold Christmas eve. I took hold of my little one with a grip, and saw her feet! Men! fathers! if the little shoes smote me, how must the feet havesinote me! I put them cold as ice, to my breast and they pierced me through. Yes, the little feet walked! right into my heart and away walked my j selfishuess. I had a trifle of money left I bought a loaf of bread aud then a pair of shoes. I never tasted anything bnt a bit of bread all tbe next, day; aud I went to work like a man on Monday, and from thut day I have spent no money at the public houses. That's a 1 I’ve got to say —it was the little shoes that did it. Could there be a more powfal temperaue lecture tbau this? Seeking- to Cnth a Crab. They tell a story of a would-be fun ny broker who last season adopted a most fiendish method of getting even with one of the chronic flirts who arc said to make the piazzas here lively later in the seasoa. He obtained half a dozen energetic crabs from the fish ing beach, and, watching for an oppr- tunily when no one was in a particular tank, except the incon-istent. fair object of bis vengence, he dropped in the crusticans (way up term for crabs), The young lady continued her natato rial exercises (jam up for paddling) a few minutes longer, when she suddenly Uttered a blood-curdling shriek, and was helped up the ladder with a crab hanging on to her pink” little toe. She had several consecutive epileptic fits while the marine corn doctor was being removed. The Mephistophelean glee of the broker, however, gave him away, and for feat of some counter trick be de cided to bathe early in the morning thereafter. A few days after that the bath-house keeper Was startled by some terrific yel.s, and, hastily entering the tank-house, he beheld the broker flouudering out with a big, jagged tooth ed spring rat-trap clenched on his heel. “Who the devil put this horrible thing in the wattr ?” reared the broker. ‘ I did, sir,” sweetly replied the crabbed young lady aforementioned, stepping out of a bath-room. “I put it there to catch those horrible crabs you know.” The broker went home on a crutch —Ex. Modern Arithmetic. Six times seven girls are how many girls’ and what on earth are they good for? #■ A lady bought a bat for $12, a set friz zes for $4. a pair of shoes for $5, and a comb for $2. How much would all have cost her if *he man hadn't told her that he had qnite the trust system? If a man retires to a room under the window of which are eleven cats singing in the moonlight, how many times will he praise the Lord, and how much of tbe furniture will be in the room next morn ing? If a young lady is sitting at a piano playing and singing, “Who will care for mother now?” while the old lady is bring ing in wood from the alleyway, how much will the young man that marries her save the first five years of their married life? If two women go into a dry goods store and look at seventeen different kinds of calico, nine kinds of silk, three kinds of bombazine, eleven kinds of lawn, and then wind up by buying a 5-cent spool of thread, what sweet names will the clerk call them- as soon as they are gone? A man who gulps down a 5-cent glass of beer and tells the saloon-keeper to charge it, is obliged to pay a doctor $2 50 for cementing a crack in his skull, while the saloonist is fined S3 for doing such a cracking good business. How much money was involved altogether, and how much would have been saved if the beat had waited nntil a candidate come along and asked him to take something? Idol Exaelly a .tliracle. Richmond, Va., June 12.—A week ago a colored boy named James Cole man, pretended to be struck dumb im mediately after praying to God to paralyze his tongue. H« was a very bad iiml unruly boy, a member of the celebrated John Jasper’s church, out of which he was expelled, after being publicly whipped by order of the Court. His condition has been the sensation of Jasper’s church. During the past week one hundred white aud black people have visited the boy, and noth ing could induce him to speak. The negroes looked upon his condition as an awful warning to all evil-doers, and great excitement existed. To-day Drs. Lee and Tabb visited Coleman and subjected him to the in fluence of chloroform in a mild degree This had no effect. The doctors then applied a valganic battery. As soon as the battery commenced (o work, Coleman faintly stammered, “Stop!” Dr. Lee said, “You will have to do better than this before we stop.” Cole man could not stand it, and yelled, “Please mass, stop; I can talk !” The colored people do not like interfer ence of the d)Ctors, declaring that Providence had the in charge, and that it was wrong for science to inter fere. Tbe matter is talked of a great deal among the negroes. The Unusual Noise. An Irishman had very bad luck in his family. He lost three of his chil dren by fever, aud going home one night from his labor fouud bis wife prostrated by spinal meningitis. At work the folic wing morning a fellow laborer and countryman asked him how his family was faring. ‘ Och, very badly; very badly, Moike. I’m havin’ the divil’s own luck. Sure it’s only the few nays ago 1 lost uiy three children, and. baa luck to me, what do you think but .-bin I went home last night 1 found me nul'e in bed with spinallo miningeetus.” i-Ye’s did ?” said Mike, looking up in amazement and anger. “And tell me, Pat, didn’t ye kill the snoozing Italian.”—El Everybody in Austin avenue remarked how miserable Col. Clary Hoskins looked when he came down Austin avenue to get his morning cocktail. “YYhat’s tbe matter with you thi3 morn ing?” asked bia friend, Jim Ratcliff. “I didn't sleep well last night. Any unnsuul noise wakes me up, and then 1 can't go to sleep again.” ~ “What was the unusual noise, Colonel?” asked Jim Ratcliff. “Well, you see. -my wife never scolds during the day, bnt she houses all her re- sentmert, like this stored resentment, and at night she turns it loose. I'm so used to it that it acts like a lullaby on me, and I sleep like a top.” “W'bat was it that disturbed you last •Ight?” “Well, you see, she began jawing away, aDd I fell asleep. aDd would have slept till morning if it hadn't been for the unusual noise.” “What was that unnsual noise that dis turbed yon after yon got asleep ?” “She quit talking,”—Texas SiftiDgs. A Blind. Witness With Experi ence. In an assault and battery case be fore a W r ayne county justice the other day, the prosecution introduced a blind man, who had to be led to the witness- box. “Is this a legal trial or a farce ?” demanded the lawyer for the defense as he sprang up. “This is a legal trial,” replied the other lawyer. ‘ And you want a blind man sworn to tell what he saw, do you ?” “^don’t claim that I saw the fight,” replied the witness as he tu-ned around. “Thm what do you know about it?” “Well, sir, I’m going on the stand to swear to what I heard. I’ve been blind and lame and had corns and boils for the last fourteen years, but when I hear the splinte^fly from a rail fence I don’t waut any eyes to tell me wheth er the plaintiff hit the t<-p rail with his head or feet! I heard the “ker- chug” of the blow, and when tbe plaintiff came down and hollered: “Oh. lands, but I’in a licked man !” 1 knew by the way he hung his words that he’d lost half his front teeth. I’m ready, your Honor!” A large nose is tbe sign of character. If it has a turkey-red finish or a big %nob oo tbe end, it is a sign that char acter has gone on a protracted vacation. From Onr Exchanges. The wheat crop ot Kansas, this yesr, is estimated at thirty million bushels England still refuses to permit a man to marry his deceased wife’s sister. Congress has very materially “cut down the bills” piesented by Garfield's butch- era Dr. J. Marrion Sims has received from the king of Spain the decoration of the order of Charles III. More than 1,000 persons were killed and wounded during the recent riot in Alex andria, Egypt, Russian Jews are still flocking to this country by thousands. Mauy of them are in abject poverty. Mr. Thomas Haygood, of Upson coun ty. has gathered 1,162 bnshels of oats from 17 acres. A negro iu Rhode Island has saed the managers of a skating rink for refusing him the privileges of the rink. The chemois is the only autelope found in Europe, and the baboon, on the rocks of Gibraltar, tbe only quadtumana. ' -Egypt will soon be depopulated of for- eighers, as they are leaving as fast ns transportation can be secured. An effort is being made in New York to revive the old Know Nothing party, that played out more than tweuty years ago, Cigar makets and printers are more numerous in the lunatic asylums of New York than men of any other trade or pro fession. Charles Gordon, of Shelby, Ala., is 76 years of age. aud proudly points to a cradle full of twins, recently born, of which he is the daddy, A St. Lonis boy drank milk with a chew of tobacco in bis mouth. The milk wash ed the tobacco dowu his throat, aud there was a funeral at his father's house. During tbe last five years about thirty persoos have been killed aud about seven ty wounded, on the government side, in the war with illicit distilliug. Notwithstanding the recent stringent legislation of Congress against polygamy, the Mormons are emigrating from Europe to this country in unusual large numbers J’wo starving children have been dis covered in Virginia, They had been aban doned by their parents, and all the nour ishment they bad had for many days was roots and barks. A Vermont man has been allowed SL- OOO under the Arrears of Pensiou9 act, for injuries received by falling off an army wag on when he was so drunk that he could not keep his seat. A prominent Englishman was in the U. S.-Congress, when an act appropriating $100,000,000 was passed under a suspen sion of the rules, wheu be exclaimed: “My God! what a government!” New Orleans has had one case of yellow fever this season, but the authorities say there is no danger of its spreading. This assurance has always been given in post years, Guiteau, the lunatic, made, Arthur Pres ident, who opened the treasure vault of tbe nation to all the Radical thieves of tbe land, and he was rewarded by an igno minious death on the gibbet Buffalo Bill has brought suit to recover $4,000,000 worth of property in Cleveland, and some one expresses the hope that, in case he is successful, he will put-aside twenty cents of it and get his hair cut. Congressman Kelley, of Pennsylvania, called Congressman White, of Kentucky, a liar in the course of the proceedings in the Hon3e. Tbe other retaliated by call ing him a scoundrel. That’s right, gen tlemen ! Get down to deaFng with facts. Sheriff Weir has arrested 121 men for voting without paying their taxes. Look sharp. Oconee men and dont get cangbt in some trap at our next election.—Oconee Monitor. An inspection of tbe ballot boxes in the various counties of tbe State would show multitudes of illegal voters. The father of a young girl in San Fran cisco, who took Doison because her lover proved fickle, while standing m the ceme tery near tbe coffined remains of his daugh ter, looked up and taw the young man approaching, hat in hand. He instantly drew a revolver and fired five shots at him. Mrs. Christiancy is seeking for forgive ness and reconciliation with her hnsband, Senator Christiancy. After the great do mestic scandal they hare created, it is difficult to see how they can be reconciled, but wheu a young aDd pretty womaD de termines to control an old mao, she gen erally is successful. A 6on of tbe late President Tyler was lately arrested in Washington for drunk enness. “Although a poor, besotted crea ture.” says a Syracuse Jdltnal correspon dent, “be ia one of the most courtly and polished meD, iu demeanor and conversa tion, to be found in Washington. One who has not seen him accept aD invitation to take a driuk. and the air with which he A Tramp’s Philosophy. In the hip pocket of an old vagrant wda a memorandum book full ot his own writ ing with a pencil, and some of bis pbiloso-’ is good enough to be preserved. HiS first paragraph reads: “Drinking bail whisky because it is of fered free is like gr!tii.g in the way of bul lets purchased by au enemy.’, A secoud reads: “Honesty is the best policy, but some folks ar° satisfied with the second beak It is bard to be honest on an empty stom ach.” . “A dry plank under a rain-proof shed is better than a feather bed in jail, and one isn't annoyed by the jailer bringing in a square breakfast.” A fourth says: “Pay us you go. If you haven’t any thing to pay with, don’t go. If you aro forced to 'go, record every indebtedness’ and let your heirs settle the bills.’' The filth explains: “We should have charity for all. When winter win :s blow cold and drear we vagsf should pity the poor lellows iu India who’ are having red hot weather.” A sixth is recorded; "Politeness costs nothing, bnt it is not expected that yon will wake a man np at midnight to ask permission to go through his heu house. It is more courteous to let him enjoy bis needed repose.” The seventh and lust we noted-down at follows: ‘When you pick np an apple core do not find fault because it is not tbe apple itself, but be satisfied with tbe grade of desent. Do not be ashamed of your oc cupation. We can not ail be lords, nor can we all be vrgraut3. As I can not be a lord, I should not lament at being a vagrant. ) e truthful and outspoken— that is. tell them you are a Chicago fire suffered Keep seasonable hours, or some other vag will get your plank first. Be hopeful, cheerful and good natured.' Growling won’t cure a sore heel,”—Phil- delphia Times. Only One Objection. I have often heard the cse'of the term, “I couldn't reach ; ’ often when it spemed appropriate often when it seemed amnsing ; but Dever to such good advantage as I did the other evening. At a select party con gregated in the spacious parlors of an up town mansion were two conspicuous fig ures—one an English inventor with a full,' rounded Cockney expression of language, the other a Chicago school girl on her summer vacation visit. The young lady was gifted with all the don’t-care-a guiu- dropaliveness of tbe ordinary Chicago creature. The Englishman, although au iuventor, was very swell and select in bia social methods. The twain were working the piano, tho former playing something cadenza, alfc the latter turning the music sheets a la sndanle. “Why,blast the thing, don’t yeouknow,’ I caun’t turn the leaves in armony,” said orr inventor friend. “Now, tell me, ’off is it, anyhow?” Then the Chicago young laely explained that she would nod her head when it necessary to turn. “I believe 1 will get up an h’inventlon for turning music sheets,” lie said musingly.' Neow, why couldn't you turn the leaves’ with your f. yeoukuow?” “Well, there is only one objection,,’ said the Chicago young lady blushiugly. “f couldn't reach.” If a St. Louis newspaper man had beenf present he would never have missed such' a splendid opportunity ol a fiendish para graph on the suffering feet of Chicago 1 ladies —Cincinnati Commercial. Kate Field says knee-breeches are “not one whit less manly than thtf hideous trousers of the period." Kate should not sit down on our trousers ia that epithetic manner. It is not right. She says, “The Gaulish Britons and other Celtic nations worejtrousers v^ry full, and gathered at the ankles, Hke . the present Highland Iruis.” PejO^ps they did. We don’t deny it. Kate was there at the time, hut we were net boro until a few generations later.—Ex,* A man on horseback, on a moon-light night, near Dublin, Ga., felt a tremen dous blow struck behind him, and hiff horse fell over to die, leaving him faoing an enormous, open-jawed aliga- tor. He killed him by thrusting < fence rail down its throat, and then shooting it a dozen times with a revol-' ver ; but it was subsequently found that its tail had been broken by the bio* which had given the horse, or the man might not have woo tbe fight. A news item says that a Sacrqg^pri lady kisses all the tramps who calf at her gate, for their motheA sake. She! seems to have solved the tramp question. Tramps never call at her gate the second time. They prefer ten days in the county jail An exchange says “an absent-mind ed Baltimorean took a bath in hie pectacles and lost them.” We should think he would. A pair of speclalee makes a very poor batliing-tnb, and be must have been a novel spectacle while thus bathiog. Perhaps the glasses got into his ear. Emma Abbot is playing a mitigated version of “Patience.” It contains more hugging and kissing, and less robing arouuu on the floor than the original. As m “Faust” and other operas, she introduces “Nearer, my will take it, has never, seen a true Virgin- j <,0< L t° Thee,'’ when an encore is de-^ ia gentleman of the real old style.” i maoded.- 31 .. . am